"La vie est-elle si prcieuse et la paix si douce, qu'on les veuille acqurir au prix des chanes et de l'esclavage ? A Dieu ne plaise ! Je ne sais le parti que vous prendrez ; pour ma part, j'ai choisi : donnez-moi la libert, ou donnez-moi la mort." - Patrick Henry (((bien pens, sinon bien dit, car la libert n'est pas donne, mais conquise)))
"Is life so dear, or peace so sweet, as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God! I know not what course others may take; but as for me, give me liberty or give me death." -- Patrick Henry, Speech of March 23, 1775 (((well thought, if not well said, for liberty is not given, but conquered)))
I don't know which lies to believe in any more.
The complete lack of evidence is the surest sign that the conspiracy is working.
Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
Real men don't fear real women.
No sense being pessimistic. It wouldn't work anyway.
Why experiment on animals when there are so many lawers.
What part of MEOW didn't you understand ?
I was on a diet for a month and lost 30 days.
Only my cat understands me.
Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them ?
I want to be a Barbie. The bitch has everything.
What part of NO! didn't you understand ?
I think therefore I'm dangerous.
I do many things well. None of which generate income.
Forget the Internet. Just talk to me !
Cats know how you feel. They just don't care.
I understand life and the universe. Cats are beyond me.
I may not look busy but I'm creating carbon dioxide.
Guess my age & weight correctly. And die.
I've nothing against God. It's his fan club I can't stand.
Am I supposed to be impressed ?
Do you want to talk to the boss or someone who knows what's going on ?
My life goals don't include pleasing you.
I'm not a slave but I play one at the office.
Tax stupidity and pay off the national debt.
No silicone here.
Originally, I wanted children, but then cat food seemed so much cheaper than college...
Let's get rid of the kids. The animals are allergic to them.
 I'm grinning from 'ere to 'ere
  {COMMO} {COMMO} COM doobie do down down
 Dogs,  Cats,  Criminals.
		      ---- This space for rent ----
 This side up
[0mThe [30minvisible [37mtagline.
                                    <-- Stealth Tagline
     Nyuck Nyuck Nyuck! [POP!] Oooooooh, a wise guy!
 1955-1975: 36 Elvis movies.  1975-1989: nothing. | Tom Neff
 I love happy faces! Don't you?
 I see how their eyes are gathered into one
 Not on your life
 Where we operate at a 90 angle to reality
! Not on your life !
! edis gnorw eht morf siht ta gnikool era uoY
! enif tsuj si gnihtyrevE
! enilgaT siht edisni deppart m'I ! pleH
!!! ereh fo tuo em teG  !!! pleH
!085 lhadmA na edisni deppart m'I  !pleH
!Reality Overload Warning!     Escape to Star Trek (Y/n)?
!edis gnorw eht morf siht ta gnikool era uoY
!enif tsuj si gnihtyrevE
!enilgaT siht edisni deppart m'I !pleH
!sgub evah t'nseod CP sihT ?sgub naem ayaddahW
"                                  " - [cloaked tagline]
" Every little BYTE helps "
" Go 'head and steal my tagline it flatters me."
" If All Fails, READ THE DOCS ! "
"#Include <me out>" - Sam Goldwyn
"... all the modern inconveniences ..." | Mark Twain
"... an experienced, industrious, ambitious, and often quite often picturesque liar." | Mark Twain
"2nd star on the right, then on until morning"
"42"?!  7.5 million years and all y-- oh, you were running Windows ..."
"42? 7 and a half million years and all you can come up with is 42?!"
"640K ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill Gates, 1981
"640K ought to be enough for anybody." |  Bill Gates
"A dirty book is rarely dusty"
"A lie is terminological inexactitude." Churchill
"A man came into the the office one day and said he was a sailor.  We cured him of that."  | Mark Twain, on his days as a doctor's apprentice in California
"A phaser is the universal communicator."
"A tree is a tree.  How many more do you have to look at?"| Governor Ronald Reagan (1966)
"A witty saying proves nothing." | Voltaire
"AMDAC?" asked the disgruntled FE.
"Acting is an art which consists of keeping the audience from coughing."
"Admiral, there be whales here"  ...  " | Scotty
"Adopted kids are such a pain -- you have to teach them how to look like you ..." | Gilda Radner
"Alaskan Visuals" by A. Roaring Boring Alice
"All decks, condition red!" - Sulu
"All flesh is grass" -- Isiah 		Smoke a friend today.
"All life's answers are on TV" -Homer Simpson
"All modern American literature comes from one book by Mark Twain called Huckleberry Finn." | Ernest Hemingway
"All my friends and I are crazy.  That's the only thing that keeps us sane."
"All the parts falling off this car are of the very finest British manufacture"| Bumper sticker
"And this, Wesley, is an airlock."
"And what will you do when you grow up to be as big as me?" asked the father of his little son. "Diet."
"Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise man to be able to sell it."
"Apple I" (c) Copyright 1767, Sir Isaac Newton.
"Apple" (c) Copyright 1767, Sir Isaac Newton.
"Are you out of your Vulcan mind?!?"
"Are you saying we should tax... Thingy?"
"Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate?"
"Arguments with furniture are rarely productive." | Kehlog Albran, "The Profit"
"As part of the conversion, computer specialists rewrote 1,500 programs -- a process that traditionally requires some debugging." | USA Today, referring to the IRS switchover to a new computer system.
"Assembly language is also available." | Jordan Henderson  (jordan@hackercorp.com)
"At last I'm organized", he sighed, and died.
"Avoid overuse of 'quotation "marks."'"
"Back to reality." - Sulu
"Bad knee, gotta run" - Pat Buchanan to his draft board
"Batman is the hero any of us could be, given determination, exercise, and deep  psychological trauma." |Chris Jarocha-Ernst
"Beam me aboard, Scotty!"  "A 2x4, sir??"
"Beam me aboard, Scotty." "Sure. Will a 2x10 do?"
"Beautiful story.  Kinda gets you right HERE" | Q
"Benson, you are so free of the ravages of intelligence" | Time Bandits
"Besides, it is clearly a bunny rabbit" | Data
"Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proved it correct, not tried it." | Donald Knuth
"Bob" Dobbs came, and comes again and again, to this plane, this planet, in order to bring Slack, yes SLACK, to the mutants, the misfits and the abnormals.
"Bob" Dobbs said, "I don't practice what I preach because I'm not the kind of person I'm preachin' to."
"Bob" is a Sex God...and He has come and come again to RATIONALIZE your sins!
"Bones, I'm a captain, not a doctor." -Kirk
"Borg?  I don't see any B%^&# NO CARRIER
"Bother!", said Pooh, as Klingons ran past his Promenade shop again.
"Bother!", said Pooh, vomiting up the gagh.
"Bother", said Pooh, as Dax's cold hands made him jump in bed.
"Bother", said Pooh, as Garanian Bolites made him itch & change color.
"Bother", said Pooh, as Kai Opaka gripped his earlobe.
"Bother", said Pooh, as Keiko O'Brien gave him a -F- for his work.
"Bother", said Pooh, as Kira accused him of being a Cardassian spy.
"Bother", said Pooh, as Kira ate him instead of the palukoo.
"Bother", said Pooh, as Kira laughed at his non-existant genitalia.
"Bother", said Pooh, as Kira told him her nose was cuter than his.
"Bother", said Pooh, as Major Kira kicked him in the crotch.
"Bother", said Pooh, as Worf nicked him in a Bat'leth tournament.
"Bother", said Pooh, as he found Odo in his honey pot.
"Bother", said Pooh, as he lost again at 'Quarks Place'.
"Bother", said Pooh, as he was voted most unrealistic alien on DS9.
"Bother", said Pooh, as his amorous advances were rejected by Dax.
"Bother", said Pooh, as the Jem'Hadar fighter crashed into his ship.
"Bother", said Pooh, as the away team beamed up without him.
"Bother", said Pooh, as the glue holding his goatee beard failed.
"Bother", said Pooh, getting his head stuck on a stick of jumja.
"Bother", said Pooh, losing count as he counted all of Dax's spots.
"Bother", said Pooh, realising Odo was disguised as his honey pot.
"Bother", said Pooh, tasting the yamok sauce.
"Bother", said Pooh, trying to figure out how Odo forms a commbadge.
"Bother", said Pooh, trying to find his self-sealing stem bolts.
"Bother", said Pooh, wishing he had a nose like a Bajoran.
"Bother",said Pooh,as Lursa & B'Etor refused to conceive his children.
"Bother," said Pooh, and deleted his message base.
"Bother," said Pooh, as he saw the mushroom cloud.
"Bother," said Pooh, as his character was replaced by Worf.
"Boy, Data, you look great in a push-up bra" | Riker
"Boy, that Data is slicker than cow snot" | Guinan
"Build a watch in 179 easy steps" by C. Forsberg.
"But I don't like Spam!!!!"
"But I don't like Spam"
"But the pusher don't care / If u live or u die"
"But this is my sister's bike!"
"But this is my sister's bike"
"But what we need to know is, do people want nasally-insertable computers?"
"By the time you get to Christian Heaven, you'll be wishing to GOD you'd made it to SubGenius Hell!!" -- St. Janor Hypercleats
"C is the assembly language of Tcl." | Karl Lehenbauer (karl@hackercorp.com)
"C++" should have been called "B-".
"COINCIDENCE" happens.
"Call it a hunch." | Quasimodo
"Call waiting", great if you have two friends
"Calling J-Man Kink.  Calling J-Man Kink.  Hash missle sighted, target Los Angeles.  Disregard personal feelings about city and intercept."
"Calvin Coolidge looks as if he had been weaned on a pickle." | Alice Roosevelt Longworth
"Calvin Coolidge was the greatest man who ever came out of Plymouth Corner, Vermont." | Clarence Darrow
"Captain Picard, I have a clever plan!" - Ensign Baldrick
"Captain, I sense millions of minds focused on my cleavage." --Troi
"Captain, Permission to hook up blender attachments to Mr Data"
"Captain, why not just give the Borg Windows 3.1?" | Worf
"Captain, you _can't_ mix matter & anti-matter _cold_!" - Scotty
"Captains Log Supplemental. The Enterprise is spiralling down..."-Kirk
"Captains Log, Stardate 1673.1  - Something has happened to me." -Kirk
"Cleveland?  Yes, I spent a week there one day."
"Colonel North, do you understand what we mean by the U.S.S.R.?" "Yes sir, it is a code name for Russia."
"Computer, delete WESLEY.EXE" - Entire Enterprise crew.
"Computer, delete WESLEY.EXE" | Entire Enterprise crew.
"Computers are useless; they can only give answers." | Picasso
"Conclusion": the place  where you got tired of thinking
"Contrariwise," continued Tweedledee, "if it was so, it might be, and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't.  That's logic" | Lewis Carroll, "Through the Looking Glass"
"Could you continue your petty bickering? I find it most intriguing."
"Criminal Lawyer" is a redundancy.
"Cut life support to all quarters with children" - Picard
"DEL *.*" - 100% file compression.
"DO NOT, repeat, DO NOT blow the hatch"
"DOS=HIGH" Hmm, I knew it was on something...
"DROPPED FROM UTS" is just VM's way of saying "Booga, Booga!"
"DROPPED FROM UTS" is just VM's way of saying "Booga, Booga"
"DROPPED FROM UTS" is just VM's way of saying UTS is out to lunch!"
"DROPPED FROM UTS" is just VM's way of saying UTS is out to lunch"
"Dad, have you seen Blip? I can't find him anywhere!"
"Dad, have you seen Blip? I can't find him anywhere"
"Damage control is easy. Reading Klingon -- that's hard."
"Dammit, Jim  I'm a doctor, not a physician"  | McCoy
"Damn it, Jim, I'm a doctor, not a tagline." Dr. McCoy
"Damnit Jim, I'm a doctor not a Tagline..."
"Danger Will Robinson Danger Danger Danger Danger"
"Danger Will Robinson! Danger! Danger! Danger! Danger!"
"Data does it in serial..."  | Tasha Yar
"Data enjoys a lot of confusion, Jean-Luc." - Deanna
"Data enjoys a lot of confusion, Jean-Luc." | Deanna
"Data! I thought you were dead!" "No, Sir. I rebooted."
"Data, I thought you were dead" "No, sir, I rebooted.."
"Deliver yesterday, code today, think tomorrow."
"Democracy is also a form of worship.  It is the worship of Jackals by  Jackasses." | H. L. Mencken
"Did ya put the cat out?" "I didn't know it was burning"
"Die?  I should say not, dear fellow.  No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to happen to him." | John Barrymore's dying words
"Do you know any Klingon opera?"  | Worf
"Dok-tor - oowoo oowoo"
"Don't believe anything you read and only half of what you see." | Will Rogers
"Don't dispute death unless you've lived through it."
"Don't mince words ... what do you *REALLY* think?"
"Don't tell me what you dream'd last night for I've been reading Freud."
"Don't use our trashcan, it's only for apples!"
"Drop the guy with the devil ears." | NBC, June, 1965.
"Energize" said Picard and the pink bunny appeared...
"Ensgin Expendable, step on that rock!" - Kirk
"Ensign Pillsbury?  He's BREAD, Jim!"
"Even historians fail to learn from history." -John Gill
"Every creature has within him the wild, uncontrollable urge to PUNT."
"Every man has his time, every man, without exception." - Picard
"Every woman should marry -- and no man." Disraeli
"Everybody, remember where we parked." -- Adm. Kirk, STIV
"Everyone lives by selling something." - R.L. Stevenson
"Excuse me, do you mind if I squish in here?" - Odo
"Excuse me, do you mind if I squish in here?" | Odo
"Extra pickles.  A warrior's condiment" | Worf
"Facts are stupid things" - Ronald Reagan
"Facts are stupid things."  | President Ronald Reagan
"Facts, though interesting, are in my opinion irrelevant." - The Borg.
"Fascinating," said Spock, watching Kirk's lousy acting.
"Fascinating."  Spock figures out the Energizer Bunny.
"Fire, Mr. Worf!"  [Worf picks up extinguisher]
"Fire, Mr. Worf"  <Worf picks up extinguisher>
"Fire, Mr. Worf"  [Worf picks up extinguisher]
"Floggings will continue until morale improves!"
"Florence of Arabia" -- feminist camelmanship
"Flowers  Is there a 'John Luck Pikkerd' here?"  | Q
"For once I agree with you, doctor." - Spock
"For there is no sea, with out the dolphin" | Oppian
"Forgotten men at the bottom of the economic pyramid" FDR
"Format all 10?  Only 3 fit in the slot
"Garlic roll, Barnabas?" "Garlic? Aieeeee!!"
"God help that country where informers thrive, where slander flourishes and lies contrive to kill by whispers, where men lie to live.  God help that country by informers fed, where fear corrupts, where suspicions spread, by look and gesture, even to the dead." -- G. Gordon Gordon
"God not only plays dice, He sometimes throws the dice where they cannot be  seen." | S. Hawking
"God said, "Let Newton be!" and all was light." Pope
"Ground Beef" -- A Cow With No Legs!
"Grub first, then ethics." | Bertolt Brecht
"Gun's don't kill people...Class 2 phasers do!"
"Hand me that solar-powered flashlight..."
"Hang onto being a human for one minute longer!" - Kirk
"He is considered the most graceful speaker who can say nothing in most words."
"He is now rising from affluence to poverty." | Mark Twain
"He taught us drawing, stretching, and fainting in coils."
"He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes ..."
"He's a potato Jim, Let's gouge out all of his eyes"
"He's dead Jim."
"He's just a politician trying to save both his faces ..."
"He's the kind of man for the times that need the kind of man he is ..."
"Heisenberg may have slept here"
"Hello, World" 17 Errors, 31 Warnings....
"Help! I've fallen and can't get up." A. Tree
"Here Bunny, Bunny, Bunny..."
"Here at the Phone Company, we serve all kinds of people; from Presidents and Kings to the scum of the earth ..."
"Hex Dump" - Where Witches put used Curses?
"Hey  Who took the cork off my lunch??"| W. C. Fields
"Hey, Worf I hooked Data up to a Modem... wanna see?"
"Hey, Worf...I hooked Data up to a Modem...Wanna see?"
"Hi, my Goldfish looks just like yours!"
"His death is irrelevant, Jim." - McCoy of Borg
"His mind is like a steel trap -- full of mice" | Foghorn Leghorn
"His super power is to turn into a scotch terrier."
"History tends to exaggerate." -Colonel Green
"Hit me again, I love it!" Soddam Hussein
"Home is is the place where your computer lives and runs your life." | Chrome Cowboy, sobiloff@thor.acc.stolaf.edu
"Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense"
"How are things?"
"How can you be deaf with ears like that?" - McCoy
"How can you be so deaf with those huge ears?"
"How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise MY hand!"
"How to Budget Your Money"  by  I.R.S.
"Humor is a drug which it's the fashion to abuse." | William Gilbert
"I  must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up." | Mark Twain, "The Innocents Abroad"
"I am Keating of Borg, prepare to be bankrupted!"
"I am Lennon of Borg.  Imagine there's no assimilation ..."
"I am a Klingon, sir. I *DO NOT* whistle while I work!"
"I am a doughnut." --John F. Kennedy
"I am a jelly doughnut." | John F. Kennedy
"I am made from the dust of the stars, the oceans flow in my veins." | Rush, "Presto"
"I am not an Economist.  I am an honest man" | Paul McCracken
"I am not sure what this is, but an `F' would only dignify it." | English Professor
"I am programmed in multiple pleasuring techniques."  | Data
"I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top." | English Professor, Ohio University
"I am the housekeeper!"
"I am the housekeeper"
"I am what I am and that's all that I am"
"I did it. I killed them all." Timothy
"I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them." - Isaac Asimov
"I do not fear computers.. I fear the lack of them." | Isaac Asimov
"I don't bite. Well, that's wrong. I do bite."  | K'Ehleyr
"I don't care who does the electing as long as I get to do the nominating" | Boss Tweed
"I don't have any solution but I certainly admire the problem." | Ashleigh Brilliant
"I don't know what you mean by YOUR way, all the ways about here belong to ME"
"I drank WHAT!?" - Socrates
"I drink to make other people interesting."| George Jean Nathan
"I hate Victor Hugo", said Les miserably.
"I hate questionarres" | Worf
"I hate quotations.  Tell me what you know." | Ralph Waldo Emerson
"I have been poor and I have been rich.  Rich is better." | Sophie Tucker
"I just ate a fishing lure," said Tom with baited breath
"I just need enough to tide me over until I need more." | Bill Hoest
"I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones."| Albert Einstein
"I like my species the way it is." | Worf to Locutus
"I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity."  | Albert Einstein
"I may not be totally perfect, but parts of me are excellent." | Ashleigh Brilliant
"I must precaution you, that legal trickery is not permitted!" - Q
"I never did trust this thing in the first place." - McCoy
"I never lie when I have sand in my boots" | LaForge
"I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member" - Groucho Marx
"I remember every fact I am exposed to, Admiral"  Data
"I said a BUD LIGHT." - J. d'Arc
"I survived torture.  I'm ready to date Lwaxana." -Picard
"I think not," said Descartes, and promptly disappeared.
"I think not," said Descartes; and promptly disappeared.
"I think there's a world market for about 5 computers." | Thomas J. Watson, Chairman of the Board, IBM (around 1948)
"I understand your concerns.  Request denied." -- Data
"I used a hand phaser and ZAP!, hot coffee." - Yeoman Rand
"I want to buy a husband who, every week when I sit down to watch `St. Elsewhere', won't scream, `FORGET IT, BLANCHE ... IT'S TIME FOR "HEE HAW"'" | Berke Breathed, "Bloom County"
"I was trying to comprehend the meaning of the words." Spock
"I wish I'd stolen that tagline."  "You will, you will!"
"I wonder what makes it _do_ that?!" - McCoy
"I would give the Devil benefit of the law for my own safety's sake." | _A_Man_for_All_Seasons_ by Robert Bolt
"I'd love to go out with you, but I did my own thing and now I've got to undo it."
"I'd love to go out with you, but I have to floss my cat."
"I'd love to go out with you, but I have to stay home and see if I snore."
"I'd love to go out with you, but I never go out on days that end in `Y.'"
"I'd love to go out with you, but I want to spend more time with my blender."
"I'd love to go out with you, but I'm attending the opening of my garage door."
"I'd love to go out with you, but I'm converting my calendar watch from Julian to Gregorian."
"I'd love to go out with you, but I'm doing door-to-door collecting for static cling."
"I'd love to go out with you, but I'm having all my plants neutered."
"I'd love to go out with you, but I'm staying home to work on my cottage cheese sculpture."
"I'd love to go out with you, but I've been scheduled for a karma transplant."
"I'd love to go out with you, but it's my parakeet's bowling night."
"I'd love to go out with you, but my favorite commercial is on TV."
"I'd love to go out with you, but the last time I went out, I never came back."
"I'd love to go out with you, but the man on television told me to stay tuned."
"I'd love to go out with you, but there are important world issues that need worrying about."
"I'll be your valentine! Now give me the cat and the flame thrower!"
"I'll have the dark bread," said Tom wryly.
"I'm Beverly...","I'm Geordi...","We are Hugh..."
"I'm Having A Ball Doing Nothing At All"
"I'm a Leo.  Leos don't believe in this astrology stuff." | Tom Neff
"I'm a grub. And I'm here to help you!"  Kirk
"I'm a lawyer." "Honest?" "No, the usual kind."
"I'm all ears, hooman" | DaiMon Perot
"I'm confining you to quarters. I want you to stay there." - Kirk
"I'm happy the affair's over. A most annoying emotional episode."-Spock
"I'm looking for Mr. Dover, first name Ben.."
"I'm not Bajoran.  Sisko punched me in the nose."  | Kira
"I'm not the one that misplaced the Deltivid asteroid belt"
"I'm the Doctor... gotta love me" | Bashir
"I've lost my flower," said Tom lackadaisically.
"I've struck oil!" Tom gushed.
"If God lived on Earth, people would knock out all His windows." | Yiddish saying
"If I had only known, I would have been a locksmith." | Albert Einstein
"If I were human, I believe my response would be 'Go to hell.'" -Spock
"If a guy tells me the probability of failure is 1 in 10E5, I know he's full of crap."  | Richard P. Feynmann, "What Do You Care What Other People Think?"
"If all men were brothers, would you want one to marry your sister?" | (title of a Theodore Sturgeon short story.)
"If dolphins are so smart, why did Flipper work for television?"
"If it keeps up, man will atrophy all his limbs but the push-button finger."
"If it works, don't mess with it" school graduate
"If it's a despot you would dethrone, see first that his throne erected within you is destroyed." | Kahlil Gibran, 1923
"If looks could kill it would've been us instead of him!"
"If looks could kill it would've been us instead of him"
"If the King's English was good enough for Jesus, it's good enough for me"| "Ma" Ferguson, Governor of Texas (circa 1920)
"If the human mind were simple enough to understand, we'd be too simple to understand it." | Pat Bahn
"If the shoe fits, buy it."  Imelda Marcos
"If we are to begin packaging ourselves as boxes of cereal, Democracy will die... for you could not win the presidency without proving unworthy of  the job."  | Adlai Stevenson
"If we can't fix it -- we'll fix it so nobody can."  B. Gibbons
"If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars."| J. Paul Getty
"If you do everything, you'll win." | Lyndon Baines Johnson
"If you go on with this nuclear arms race, all you are going to do is make the rubble bounce" | Winston Churchill
"If you have to hate, hate gently"
"If you hear muffled screams, consider that a request for a beam out."
"If you prick me, do I not...  Leak?" | Data
"If you took all the sincerity in Hollywood and put it in the navel of a fruit  fly, you'd still have room for three carraway seeds and a producer's heart." | Fred Allen
"If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster..."
"If you want to make enemies, try to change something." - Woodrow Wilson
"If you wants to get elected president, you'se got to think up some memoraboble homily so's school kids can be pestered into memorizin' it, even if they don't know what it means." | Walt Kelly, "The Pogo Party"
"Imagination is more important than knowledge" | Einstein
"Imagination rules the world" Napoleon I (1769-1821)
"In a moment, in the twinkling of an eye..."
"In defeat, unbeatable; in victory, unbearable." | Winston Curchill, of Montgomery
"In my expert medical opinion, I'd say it's...sick." - Bashir
"In short, N is Richardian if, and only if, N is not Richardian."
"Is that funny?  Is that a joke?"  | Data
"Is that lemon in your tea?"  "No, s'lime."
"Is that your name or your species?" - O'Brien
"Is" is the verb for when you don't want a verb.
"It can't happen here" is number one on the list of famous last words.
"It compiled?  The first screen came up?  Ship it!" -- Bill Gates
"It is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased." | Kehlog Albran, "The Profit"
"It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give up because by that time I was too famous."
"It's Fabulous  We haven't seen anything like it in the last half an hour" | Macy's
"It's a mystery and I don't like mysteries!" - Kirk
"It's bad luck to be superstitious." | Andrew W. Mathis
"It's comin' apart, Lad" | Scotty
"It's easier said than done." ... and if you don't believe it, try proving that it's easier done than said, and you'll see that "it's easier said that `it's easier done than said' than it is done", which really proves that "it's easier said than done".
"It's like nothing we've dealt with before." - Spock
"It's not Camelot, but it's not Cleveland, either." | Kevin White, mayor of Boston
"It's not an inference. It's a definite suspicion." - Odo
"It's not supposed to do that." - McCoy
"Jesus saves sinners... and redeems them for valuable cash prizes" | John Wichers (wichers@husc4.HARVARD.EDU)
"Just as they are."
"Just once, I wish we would encounter an alien menace that wasn't immune to bullets" | The Brigader, "Dr. Who"
"Just when we finally got good at this, we    \_i_/  run out of planets." | a Voyager scientist
"Keep the smoke inside." -- 1st Rule of Electronics.
"Keep your eggs in one basket. And watch it carefully!" - Mark Twain
"Keptin, a Romulan Wessel ahead!" "A _wessel_, Mr.Chekov?"
"Kernal" is not a word.  The correct spelling is "kernel".
"Kirk to Enterprise -- beam down yeoman Rand and a six-pack."
"Knowing when to optimize is as important as knowing how." | Tom Neff
"LARKS' VOMIT It don't say nothing on the box about larks' vomit"|Monty Python--"Trade Descriptions Act"
"Laughter is the closest distance between two people." | Victor Borge
"Lets visit the tomb," said Tom cryptically.
"Life may have no meaning -- or even worse, it may have a meaning of which I disapprove."
"Life," said Marvin. "Don't talk to me about life."
"Like the ski resort full of girls looking for husbands and husbands looking for girls, the situation is not as symmetrical as it might seem."  | Alan McKay
"Listen, have you seen the dolphins yet?" | Geordi
"Logic is logic. That's all I say." Holmes
"Look at all the Indians" | General Custer
"Look at those newborn kittens," said Tom literally.
"Lubricant. Pennzoil. Steaming hot." * Locutus of Borg
"Luke... Luke... Use the MOUSE, Luke" - Obi Wan Gates
"MAC user's dynamic debugging list evaluator? Never heard of that."
"MEOW"...SPLAT..."RUFF"...SPLAT...(Raining cats & dogs)
"MODEM"... Mostly Overpriced Data Eating Machine.
"MacDonald has the gift on compressing the largest amount of words into the smallest amount of thoughts." | Winston Churchill
"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain." | Lily Tomlin
"Mate, this parrot wouldn't VOOM if you put four million volts through it!"
"Mate, this parrot wouldn't VOOM if you put four million volts through it"
"Matrimony isn't a word, it's a sentence."
"Maytag" is my middle name; I'm an agitator.
"Meanwhile, we remain in orbit to complete our mission." - Kirk
"Medically impossible by any standards." - McCoy
"Memory serves wise commanders." | Tz'u-hsi, 638 AD
"Men, in general, are but great great children" Napoleon
"Might as well be frank, monsieur.  It would take a miracle to get you out of Casablanca and the Germans have outlawed miracles."
"Millions long for immortality who don't know what to do with themselves  on a rainy Sunday  afternoon." | D. P. Barron
"Mind your own business, Spock.  I'm sick of your halfbreed interference."
"Mister Worf, show these children the airlock." - Picard
"Modem," said the gardener when he'd finished the lawn
"Modem," said the gardener when he'd finished the lawn..
"Modesty died when false modesty was born." Mark Twain
"Monopoly? No, we just don't want competition" --Intel
"Monopoly? No, we just don't want competition."
"Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." | Abe Lincoln
"Most humanoids have the potential to be irrational" - Data
"Mr Worf, scan that ship!" "Aye, Captain. 300 dpi?"
"Mr. Worf, fire phasers at @FN@" ... Zzzzzap
"Mr. Worf, scan that ship." "Aye Captain. 300 dpi?"
"My God, Thiokol, when do you want me to launch?  Next April?"  | L. Mulloy
"My God, it's full of stores" - 2001: A Shopping Odyssey
"My demonstration of concern will not change what has happened."-Spock
"My favorite color?  Red.  No, BluAAAAAHHH!"
"My favorite part of dinner"| Riker
"My name is Crusher.  Where's Ensign Walnut?" | Beverly
"My stereo's half fixed," said Tom monotonously.
"My weight is perfect for my height -- which varies"
"NASA Announces New Deck Chair Arrangement For Space Station Titanic." | Tom Neff
"NASA Awards Acronym Generation System (AGS) Contract For Space Station Freedom" | Tom Neff
"NO KILL I"  -  HORTA
"Nature loves a vacuum.  Digital doesn't."  | DEC sales letter
"No problem is too big it can't be run away from"  | Linus
"Nondeterminism means never having to say you are wrong."
"Not a problem."--Parker Lewis
"Not only is this incomprehensible, but the ink is ugly and the paper is from the wrong kind of tree." | Profesoor W.
"Now bid me run, and I will strive with things impossible - yea, and get the better of them." | W. Shakespeare, JULIUS CAESAR
"Now is the time for all good men to come to."| Walt Kelly
"Now, more than ever, it is evident that `good taste' only refers to that  which reinforces the status quo."  | Andre Peret
"Nurse! I said: "Take off his SPECtacles!"
"Of course it's the murder weapon.  Who would frame someone with a fake?"
"Oh  I thought that was a parrot".   "No, no... They turn that color."
"Oh!  I thought that was a parrot!".   "No, no... They turn that color."
"Oh, Aunty Em, it's so good to be home!"
"Oh, Aunty Em, it's so good to be home"
"One planet is all you get."
"Oops." -- Richard Nixon
"Our Pentium-driven sensors indicate 3.000005243 Romulans decloaking."
"Paid off"?  What does that mean?
"Pascal is not a high-level language." | Steven Feiner
"Perestroika: could it happen here?" | Tom Neff
"Picard, get some hair. Your brain has caught cold." * Q
"Please return stewardess to original upright position"
"Poor dear, there's nothing between his ears." | Margaret Thatcher, about Ronald Regan, 6/2/88 issue of The New York Times
"Psychoanalysis is the mental illness it purports to cure." | Karl Kraus
"Push to test" ..<click>.. "Release to detonate"
"Put knot yore trussed in spel chequers!"
"Q wants to do something *nice* for me." "I'll alert the crew."
"Question and die", sayeth the CZAR!!!!
"Quick and Dirty Program" is only half right.
"Quiet"...is an impossibility these days...
"Qvid me anxivs svm?"
"RESISTENCE IS FUTILE...." | The Borg
"Reading legal mush can turn your brain to guacamole"  | Amiga ROM Kernel Manual
"Really ??  What a coincidence, I'm shallow too"
"Really honey....just 1 more message."
"Rebellion is like witchcraft. That's what it is, it's like witchcraft." | Missouri State Rep. Jean Dixon, on labeling "offensive music".
"Religion is the biggest trick the Devil ever pulled.  "Bob", on the other hand, is the bigest trick ever pulled on the Devil."
"Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead." | W. Shakespeare, HAMLET
"Satanic Verses is a despicable book that could not have been written by  a person who wished to behave decently and responsibly." | Orson Scott Card
"Scotty  Beam me aboard"  "Aye sir  Will a 2x4 do?"
"Scotty!, beam me Augggg!" *...NO CARRIER
"Scotty, I've fallen and I can't beam up"
"Scotty, beam me up another Blue Wave message."
"Scotty, beam us a board" (2x4 drops from sky)
"Seek Error" - Who told it to look for anything?
"Sex is better than reading; no overdue fines."  | Jean-Luc Picard
"She is descended from a long line that her mother listened to." | Gypsy Rose Lee
"She's so fat that when she sings, it's over."
"Ships ahoy!" yelled Tom fleetingly.
"Simon, can you pronounce your name backwards?"... "No Mis"
"Sir Klingons on the starboard bow" "Well, scrape 'em off
"Sir, Deck Fourteen reports that the toilet's blocked."
"Sir, it's the USS CH9 hailing.. Look! there's repeats of us on!"
"Sir, there is a multi-legged creature on your shoulder"  Spock
"So many obituaries...And always the wrong ones" |Marian Balsam
"Socialism and Nazism is the same."  - Adolf Hitler
"Sometimes I simply feel that the whole world is a cigarette and I'm the only ashtray."
"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar" - Freud
"Sometimes you just have to say 'What the heck'"
"Soviet Union? That's a code name for Russia." | Ollie North. :-)
"Stalinism begins at home." | Tom Neff
"Stealing a rhinoceros should not be attempted lightly."
"Stop smirking Number One." - Picard
"Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government" | M. Python
"Stressed" is just desserts spelled backwards.
"Stupid" is a boundless concept.
"Such grudges.  Give us a kiss, Worf." | Q
"Suicide Hotline...please hold."
"Swab the poop deck, raise the mizzenmast" | Picard
"Take my Worf... please."  | Data
"Take my Worf......please"-Data
"Take off your engineering hat and put on your management hat." | Thiokol management, 1/27/86
"Tea, Earl Grey, Hot." -Picard "Ale, Romulan, Lots." -Kirk
"Tell me, is this Heaven?"  "No, it's Iowa."
"Text processing has made it possible to right-justify any idea, even one which cannot be justified on any other grounds." | J. Finnegan, USC.
"That makes 144," said Tom grossly.
"That must be wonderful  I don't understand it at all."
"That was the stun setting." <bleep> "This is not."
"That's no tagline  It's Odo"
"That's user, u s r, and then there's a space ..."
"The C Programming Language -- A language which combines the flexibility of assembly language with the power of assembly language."
"The Dolphin, ne'er has anything been more divine"| Oppian
"The Lord gave us farmers two strong hands so we could grab as much as we could with both of them." | Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
"The Nazis have no sense of humor, so why should they want television?" | Philip K. Dick
"The abstract means nothing to me!" Rorschach.
"The bland leadeth the bland and they both shall fall into the kitsch."
"The climate of Bombay is such that its inhabitants have to live elsewhere."
"The condition upon which God has given liberty to man is eternal vigilance." | John Philpot Curran
"The country couldn't run without Prohibition.  That is the industrial fact." | Henry Ford, 1929
"The difference between a misfortune and a calamity?  If Gladstone fell into the Thames, it would be a misfortune.  But if someone dragged him out again, it would be a calamity." | Benjamin Disraeli
"The faster you go, the shorter you are" - Einstein
"The filter has discreting sources." | KSC FIDO, 1/28/86
"The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a bit longer." | Henry Kissinger
"The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a bit longer."| Henry Kissinger
"The impossible has happened." - Kirk
"The law hath not been dead, though it hath slept." Shake
"The maid has the night off," said Tom helplessly.
"The more RAM you have, the better", M. Chambers
"The only victory over love is flight."  Napoleon
"The pen really is mightier than the sword!"
"The previous cookie was absolutely True." | God
"The real problem with SDI is that it doesn't kill anybody." | Tom Neff
"The security of the Enterprise is of Paramount importance"
"The society which scorns excellence in plumbing as a humble activity and tolerates shoddiness in philosophy because it is an exaulted activity will have neither good plumbing nor good philosophy ... neither its pipes nor its theories will hold water."
"The sooner you start to code, the longer the program will take." -Roy Carlson
"The voters have spoken, the bastards ..."
"The warning message we sent the Russians was a calculated ambiguity that would be clearly understood." | Alexander Haig
"The way to make a small fortune in the commodities market is to start with a large fortune."
"The way to make a small fortune in the commodities market is to start with a large fortune."
"The welfare of the people is the chief law."  Cicero
"The word?  The word is 'no.'  I am, therefore, going anyway." - Kirk
"The world's a theater, the earth a stage" -- WS
"There are _many_ things I don't understand, doctor." - Kirk
"There are three possibilities: Pioneer's solar panel has turned away from the sun; there's a large meteor blocking transmission; or someone loaded Star Trek 3.2 into our video processor."
"There are two ways of disliking poetry; one way is to dislike it, the other is to read Pope." | Oscar Wilde
"There goes Bill!"
"There goes Bill"
"There was a boy called Eustace Clarence Scrubb, and he almost deserved it." | C. S. Lewis, The Chronicles of Narnia
"There's no such thing as gravity - the earth sucks."
"There's nothing wrong with Southern California that a rise in the ocean level  wouldn't cure. " | Ross MacDonald
"There's nothing you can do that can't be done."  John Lennon
"There's nothing you can do that can't be done." |John Lennon
"These are not kid gloves, Mr. Valiant"
"They are not the hell your whales." | Spock
"They thought to use and shame me but I win out by nature, because a true freak cannot be made.  A true freak must be born." | K. Dunn, _Geek Love_
"They told me I was gullible ... and I believed them"
"They took some of the Van Goghs, most of the jewels, and all of the Chivas!"
"They took some of the Van Goghs, most of the jewels, and all of the Chivas"
"Thief" is so ugly.  I prefer "Creative Acquisition Specialist."
"This hat's not big enough for both of us" :Guinan
"This is a country where people are free to practice their religion, regardless of race, creed, color, obesity, or number of dangling keys ..."
"This is one American Marine who will always tell the truth, Sir."|Ollie North
"This meat is hard to chew," Tom beefed jerkily.
"This sentence no verb." - Douglas R. Hofstader
"Those who worked the hardest are the last to surrender." | Gary Ward
"To YOU I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition." | Woody Allen
"To be, or not to be."--Hamlet   "Do-bee-do-bee-do."--Sinatra
"To err is human, to forgive....$5.00"
"To have a horror of the bourgeois is bourgeois." | Jules Renard
"Toto, I don't think we're in DOS anymore..."
"Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore!"
"Toto, I don't think we're in Kansas anymore"
"Trees cause more pollution than automobiles do." | President Ronald Reagan
"UNIX should be used as an adjective." | AT&T
"US out of North America, NOW" | Richard O'Rourke
"Ummm, Trouble with grammar have I! Yes!" -Yoda-
"Unlike you, we humans are full of unpredictable emotions." - Kirk
"Unlimited campaign spending eats at the heart of the democratic process." | Barry Goldwater
"Wanna byte my bit?"
"War is like love; it always finds a way." | Bertold Brecht
"Wayne Newton is," he says, "an example of what America can be."
"We are Homer of Borg.  Prepare to be assimil...oooh, doughnuts...."
"We fall into error if we attribute to strategy a power  independent of tactical results."| Karl von Clausewitz, On War
"We have luck only with women -- not spacecraft" | R. Kremnev, builder of failed Soviet FOBOS probes
"We must laugh at man, to avoid crying for him" | Napoleon
"We must never forget that if the war in Vietnam is lost... the right of  free speech will be extinguished throughout the world." | Richard Milhouse Nixon, 10/27/65
"We plan absentee ownership.  I'll stick to building ships." | George Steinbrenner, 1973
"We walked on the moon -- you be polite."  | Joni Mitchell
"We're Going North Like Hell"
"We're beaming down with some questions." - Kirk
"Welcome to Earth, third rock from the sun!"
"Well I've often seen a cat without a grin, but a grin without a cat"
"Well! I've often seen a cat without a grin, but a grin without a cat!"
"What is your favorite color?"  "Blue - no - yel"
"What's 'e matter w' that thing?" - Scotty
"What's 'e matter w' that thing?" | Scotty
"What's the definition of a good flame?  One you agree with..." | Karl Lehenbauer
"What's up, Doc?" - Ensign Bugs to Crusher
"When it comes to computer security, paranoia is not enough." - Ralph Jones
"When you have to kill a man it costs nothing to be polite."| Winston Curchill, On formal declarations of war
"Where there's smoke, there's a big-headed trans-dimensional soul-eater." -- Dr. Onan Canobite
"Who am I to argue with the Captain of the Enterprise?" - Kirk
"Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster." | Nietsche
"Whom are you?" said he, for he had been to night school.
"Why don't the Japanese live in the mountains?  Certainly, they could;  apparently they just don't want to." | elturner@phoenix.Princeton.EDU
"Why isn't it ever unfair in MY favor?" Calvin.
"Why stop now?  Just when I'm hating it."| Marvin
"Will toys amuse when medicines cannot cure?" Reverend Edward Young
"Worf  Still struggling up the evolutionary ladder?" | Q
"Yes dear, one more star WILL fit on that collar
"Yes, Virginia...there IS a global Conspiracy."
"Yield to temptation, it may not pass your way again." - L. Long
"Yields falsehood when preceded by its quotation" - DRH
"You can explain _that_ to the Captain." - Spock
"You can measure a programmer's perspective by noting his attitude on  the continuing viability of Fortran." | Alan Perlis
"You can't get snot off of a suede jacket." | Lenny Bruce
"You could say, I have a magnetic personality!" - Data
"You have your intelligence controlling your fear." - Spock
"You killed Ted, you medieval dickweed" | Bill
"You mean I can send mail to myself?"
"You mean you can't take less, it's very easy to take more than nothing."
"You open that scab, there's a hell of a lot of things... This involves these Cubans, Hunt, and a lot of hanky-panky that we have nothing to do with..."  | Richard Milhouse Nixon
"You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat.  You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles.  Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there.  The only difference is that there is no cat." | Albert Einstein, when asked to describe radio
"You shouldn't have anymore problems..."
"You're concerned over a letter of the alphabet?" - Lwaxana
"You're good, kid, but as long as I'm around..."
"hat in God's name am I doing wrong?" | Wile E. Coyote
"reproduces if added to its quotation." reproduces if added to its quotation.
# @(#)/usr/games/lib/fortunes	1.7 10/21/86 16:08:28 - Amdahl/UTS
# of Vulcans needed to replace a bulb? Precisely 1.0000000
#define QUESTION ((bb) || !(bb))  - Shakespeare.
#define flame_retardant  I know you are, but what am I?
#include <mandatory_cute_tagline>
$ egrep -n '^[a-z].*\\(' $@ | sort -t':' +2.0
$ fortune
$ rm -r $HOME
$$$ not found --  A)bort, R)efinance, D)eclare bankruptcy
$$$$$$$$ Money is the root of all wealth $$$$$$$$
$10  Whatta you want $8 for? You know how much $6 is. Ok. Here's $4. (Gives son $2 and asks for $1 change).|Jewish Father
$100 invested at 7% interest for 100 years will become $100,000, at which time it will be worth absolutely nothing. | Lazarus Long, "Time Enough for Love"
$1000 reward for finding this man :
$1000 reward for finding this man:
$3,000,000
$Big book, big bore.
&   <:=======   (Snake stalking ampersand).
&TheMenWhoHoldHighPlacesMustBeThe1stToStart..
'A fair day's wage for a fair day's work': it is as just a demand as governed men ever made of governing. It is the everlasting right of man. Thomas Carlyle
'Ah  I have access.' | Data
'Be Yourself' is about the worst advice you can give to people. Mark Twain
'C' What ?
'Cause that's the way the computer crumbles.
'Do you pray for the Senators, Dr. Hale?' someone asked the chaplain. 'No, I look at the Senators and pray for the country.' Edward Everett Hale
'Don't you worry, and don't you hurry.' I know that phrase by heart, and if all other music should perish out of the world it would still sing to me. Mark Twain, from Home Conditions 1900, referring to a saying from his Grandmother.
'God works in many ways His wonders to perform.' But He's not a skillful mechanic. A man drived over a cliff and 'by a miracle' he only breaks his back. It would be more divine if he were a better driver and stayed on the road. Paul Goodman
'Has eighteen letters' does.
'Home, Sweet Home' must surely have been written by a bachelor.
'I'm so insane, I voted for Eisenhower.' 'Oh yeah, well I'm so insane, I voted for Eisenhower TWICE!' Ken Kesey from 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest'
'Only a vaRool would use such language in public.' | Riker
'Perhaps you and the jerko here could come with us.'
'Personal hygene is the key to success'- W. Nels
'Saddle up, father' | Alexander, to Worf
'Share and Enjoy' - that's my motto.
'Stay' is a charming word in a friend's vocabulary. Louisa May Alcott
'The question is,' said Alice, 'whether you can make words mean so many different things.' 'The question is,' said Humpty Dumpty, 'which is to be master that's all.' Lewis Carroll
'The universe is a spheroid region 705 meters in diameter'
'There is no use trying,' said Alice; 'one can't believe impossible things.' 'I dare say you haven't had much practice,' said the Queen. 'When I was your age, I always did it for half an hour a day. Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impos Lewis Carroll (Through the Looking Glass)
'These are days you'll remember.' If you recall nothing else from your graduation ceremony, remember you heard the New Jersey Governor quote from 10,000 Maniacs. Christine Todd, NJ governor, Wheaton College Graduation, 1995
'Tis against some men's principle to pay interest, and seems against others' interest to pay the principle. Benjamin Franklin
'Tis mad idolatry To make the service greater than the god. William Shakespeare
'Tis more blessed to give than to receive; for example, wedding presents. H.L. Mencken
'Tis not the many oaths that make the truth; But the plain single vow, that is vow'd true. William Shakespeare
'Tis the business of little minds to shrink; but he whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves his conduct, will pursue his principles unto death. Thomas Paine
'To be or not to be'... that's not a question!!!
'Transporting really is the safest way to travel.' | Geordi
'til you come back to me, that's what I'm gonna do...
(!@&*#%^!#%) -- Censored by GAWD Himself...
((((((((((HYPNOTIC))))))))))((((((((((TAGLINE))))))))))
(((((((HYPNOTIC)))))))(((((((TAGLINE)))))))
(((((This message in Stereo where available)))))
((wrong && wrong) != right)
(1) Ignore (2) Retry (3) Abort (4) MeltDown
(A)bort (F)ail (T)oss computer across room
(A)bort (R)epent (I)gnorant?
(A)bort (R)etry (F)ail, (G)rab_Hammer
(A)bort (R)etry (G)et The Sledge Hammer
(A)bort (R)etry (I)gnore, (K)ick system?
(A)bort (R)etry (I)gnore, (O)verthrow System?
(A)bort (R)etry (I)gnore, (S)orry I Asked
(A)bort (R)etry (I)nfluence with large hammer
(A)bort (R)etry (K)ill innocent bystanders
(A)bort (R)etry (P)anic
(A)bort (R)etry (P)retend this never happened . . .
(A)bort (R)etry (S)ell it
(A)bort (R)etry (S)mack the @#$&*~ thing
(A)bort (R)etry (S)mack the friggin thing
(A)bort (R)etry (S)ue
(A)bort (R)etry (T)ake an axe to it?
(A)bort, (F)ail, (T)oss computer across room
(A)bort, (R)epent, (I)gnorant ?
(A)bort, (R)etry, (F)ail, (G)rab Hammer ?
(A)bort, (R)etry, (F)ail, (T)oss computer across room ?
(A)bort, (R)etry, (I)gnore, (K)ick_system ?
(A)bort, (R)etry, (I)gnore, (M)eltDown ?
(A)bort, (R)etry, (I)gnore, (S)orry_I_Asked !
(A)bort, (R)etry, (I)nfluence with large hammer ?
(A)bort, (R)etry, (P)anic ?
(A)bort, (R)etry, (P)retend this never happened...
(A)bort, (R)etry, (S)ell it ?
(A)bort, (R)etry, (S)mack the @#$&*~ thing!
(A)bort, (R)etry, (S)ue ?
(A)bort, (R)etry, (W)hackitonthesideofthemonitor!
(A)bort, (R)etry, or (C)oerce with hammer.
(A)bort, (R)etry, or (I)nfluence with hammer.
(C)ontrol (A)lt (B)ye
(D)inner not ready:  (A)bort (R)etry (P)izza
(D)inner not ready: (A)bort, (R)etry, (P)izza ?
(I)gnore (R)etry (A)bort (M)eltdown
(Ice rocks hit the hull)  "Captain, we are being hailed."
(This fortune deleted due to painfully extreme insipidity.)
(W)indows, (I)cons, (M)ice, (P)ointers, (S)heesh !
(a+b) = a * b =0
(beep) Help, I've fallen and can't reach the beer.
(char *)lie = "brown";
(huskily) Oh, yes ! Scan me NOW ! ޺۳ݳݳ
(takeoffs == landings) ? win() : lose()
(U) What are you lookin' at ?
(U) What are you looking at ?
* * * WELCOME HOME THE TROOPS * * *
* *TAKE A KID CAMPING THIS SUMMER* *
* Unix is a Trademark of Bell Laboratories.
* YMBAT If you killed your dog testing your home-made transporter.
*'M ST*P*D - I'd like to buy a vowel, Pat, an "O" please.
*** NEWSFLASH *** Russian tanks steamrolling through New Jersey  Details at eleven
*** TAGLINE BAN IN EFFECT IN THIS CONFERENCE ***
**** Nothing Follows ****
************ eta testers are CRAZY ! ************
**FLASH** Everready Bunny arrested, charged with battery.
*- I read it on the Continuum -*
*I* didn't do it, the *computer* did it !
*IT IS* documented, look under "For Internal Use Only."
*NOW* is a point in time that is already gone.
*Who WAS that masked mailer?*
*_?!^%$#+\)#!~ = Klingon for "Hello, dear."
- A RAM is a terrible thing to waste.
- BBSing: Files, folks and fun.
- FOR SYSOP USE ONLY - Do not write below this line.
- How're you going to do it?  Upgrade It!
- Q: 386+387?       A: 486-8K
- The Def. of Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.
- This space for Rent -
- This space intentionally left blank -
- Thou shall not kill.
- this space intentionally left blank -
-  Most people deserve each other!  -
-  Time is forever -- a diamond is only temporary  -
-  Today is cancelled due to lack of interest !  -
-- Nature always sides with the hidden flaw ! --
---      There's ALWAYS one more bug !      ---
--- A naked man fears no pickpocket ---
---- This space for rent ----
---- Who do you call to exorcise software ? ----
------+--+ TAGLINE MEASURING TAPE +--+------
---------- Out of Order ----------
--------------------- cut here --------------------------
----> If you cut here, you'll ruin your monitor. <----
--T-A+G-L-I+N-E--+M-E-A+S-U-R+I-N-G+--G-A+U-G-E--
-> Today is cancelled due to lack of interest! <-
->BOREALIS is where I'm at.
.. Carefull the camel spits  <* * * * *
.. So we immediately rushed out and set up our own Lost Manual Review Committee..| HavenTree
... And malt does more than Milton can To justify God's ways to man | A. E. Housman
... Borg spreadsheet program: Locutus 1-2-3
... Ensign, Engage!
... Had this been an actual emergency, we would have fled in terror, and you would not have been informed.
... I believe one of America's most priceless assets is the idealism which motivates the young people of America. My generation has invested all that it has, not only its love but its hope and faith, in yours. Richard M. Nixon
... Scotty, Hurry beam me u%#$&      NO CARRIER
... So it is Written, So Let it be Done!
... The Anarchists' [national] anthem is an international anthem that consists of 365 raspberries blown in very quick succession to the tune of "Camptown Races".  Nobody has to stand up for it, nobody has to listen to it, and, even better, nobody has to play it. | Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"
... and eliminate and wipe out redundancy
... anything a customer thinks a store is losing money on. Kin Hubbard
... as we wake or sleep, we grow strong or we grow weak, and at last some crisis shows us what we have become. Bishop Westcott
... at least I thought I was dancing, 'til somebody stepped on my hand. | J. B. White
... government that 'substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few.' George Bernard Shaw
... it's a sort of bloom on a woman. If you have it you don't need to have anything else; and if you don't have it, idoesn't much matter what else you have. James Matthew Barrie
... not picked from the leaves of any author, but bred amongst the weeds and tares of mine own brain. Thomas Browne
... one who never hurts anyone's feelings unintentionally. Oliver Herford
... the instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country. Ambrose Bierce
... the patriotic art of lying for one's country. Ambrose Bierce
.... now touch these wires to your tongue!
......<-Stealth Tagline
...Make...the Taglines go awaaaaaaaaaay....
...Now where did I put that fire extinguisher?
...and all the children are above average
...and in between are the doors.
...and my special thanks to the Other Forty-Nine
...and never, ever cut a deal with a dragon.
...and sometimes the bear eats you.
...and that is how we know the Earth is banana-shaped.
...and the horse you rode in on!
...and then I woke up
...and then a shout was heard from the Holodeck......"Fooooodfiiight!"
...and they lived happily ever after.
...and this is your brain with a side order of bacon.
...boldly going where no clusters have gone before.
...but have you tried PRUNES?
...but there are no old, bold pilots.
...but what I really want to do is direct.
...going where no clusters have gone before.
...make us eat our vegetables, do our homework, and turn off the TV whenever it became violent or sexy. Jonathan Lange, age 10, from Easton, PA, on what it would be like to have Bob Dole as a fill-in parent, 1996
...no thanks, I'm already having one.
...now, where did I put that fire extinguisher ?
...only a test. Had this been an actual tagline...
...square root,cube root,log of pi;let's go get'em RPI!
...to point at the moon a finger is needed, but woe to those who take the finger for the moon... D.T. Suzuki
...when you have eliminated the impossible, that which remains, however improbable, must be the truth. Arthur Conan Doyle, english author
...whose food is night, winter, and death.
...would you like me to sing you a song?
...ywercs lla og tsuj sgniht semitemoS
..Just a RIME without a reason.....
..and the lawyer looks down at his mutilated and severed arm and says: My Rolex, my Rolex
.ASM programmers drive stick shifts !
.aixelsyd evah t'nod I ,aN
.signature not found!  reformat hard drive? [Yn]
/EARTH is 98% full. Please delete anybody you can
/usr/news/gotcha
0 0 0 Destruct 0........ ^&#^_&$(@! NO SUB-SPACE CARRIER ....
001010010010101101010101000010010101011011010101
07/11 PDP a ni deppart m'I  pleH
085 lhadmA na edisni deppart m'I  pleH
0x2B || !0x2B -- Hamlet
1 + 1 = ?  Ask my calculator.
1 + 2 = 3 therefore 4 + 5 = 6.
1 Minute Shut Mouth Is Worth 1 Hour Explanation !
1 Minute Shut Mouth Worth 1 Hour Explanation
1 bulls, 3 cows
1.  None.  (Moses didn't have an ark). | Answers to Last Fortune's Questions:
1.  The most powerful force in the world is that of a disc  straining to land under a car, just out of reach (this force is technically termed "car suck"). 2.  Never precede any maneuver by a comment more predictive than "Watch this" | Two constant Laws of Frisbee
1. Never be first.
10 9 8 7 {Bo Derek Getting older}
10.0 times 0.1 is hardly ever 1.0.
100 blocks of crud on the disk, 100 blocks of crud You patch a bug, and dump it again: 101 blocks of crud on the disk ...
113 grams, 10 milliliters ... He's lead, Jim.
11th Commandment: Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's tag
11th commandment - Covet not thy neighbor's 586.
15c of every stamp is for storage
186,000 miles per second -- it's not just a good idea, it's the law
186,000 miles per second -- it's not just a good idea, it's the law!
186,000 miles per second: it's not just a good idea, it's the law.
186,282 miles per second: It isn't just a good idea, it's the law
1912 - U.S. Income tax enacted to tax wealthiest 5%.
1991 -- The Year of the Palindrome.
1st LAW OF TESTS: 80% of the final will be on the one lecture you missed and about the one book you didn't read.
1st Law of Thermodynamics: Go to class!!
1st rule of intelligent tinkering - save all the parts
1st we shoot all the lawyers, 2nd we strangle them, 3rd..
2 + 2 = 3.999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.
2 + 2 = 5. It HAS to : the computer says so.
2 is not equal to 3, not even for very large values of 2. Grabel's Law
2 wrongs don't make a right - but 3 lefts do !
2 wrongs don't make right but 3 rights make left
2+2=3.999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
2+2=5... It HAS to, the computer says so.
2-0 is a cricket score in this sort of football.
2.  Your mother, by the pigeonhole principle. | Answers to Last Fortune's Questions:
2. Never be last.
2.998e10 cm/sec;  It's not just a good idea, it's the law.
20 years experience... or 1 year repeated ?
205 Mb hard drive... 5 Mb free...
23. ...  r-q1
24 hours in a day and 24 beers in a case.  Hmmmm.....
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case, Hmmm.....
2400 Baud makes you want to get out and push
24th century Political correctness... We are Borg.
2B, or not 2B, or should I use a biro.
2nd LAW OF TESTS: When reviewing your notes before an exam, the most important ones
3 dreaded words when making love: Is that it?
3 out of 4 Americans make up 75% of the population.
3 x 10^8 m/s. Not just a good idea, it's the law.
3.  I don't know. | Answers to Last Fortune's Questions:
3. Never volunteer for anything.
3000000 km/sec -- it's not just a good idea, it's the law
3000000 km/sec -- it's not just a good idea, it's the law!
320
33mHz ain't fast enough
355/113 -- Not the famous irrational number PI, but an incredible simulation
4 food groups: fast, frozen, microwaved, and junk
4.  Who cares? | Answers to Last Fortune's Questions:
43% of all statistics are totally worthless !!!
43% of all statistics are worthless.
43.3% of all statistics are meaningless.
43.3% of statistics are meaningless !
43rd Law of Computing: Anything that can go wr.. |fortune: Segmentation violation -- Core dumped
43rd Law of Computing: Anything that can go wr...
4500 more jokes, one liners and stupid phrases become available when you register| Use Control Panel "desktop" applet for details
4Dos, without it your PC is broken!
4Sale, braille dictionary like new, must see 2 appreciate
4am?  Already?  Oh no not again!!
5 out of 4 people have trouble with fractions.
5 schizophrenics agree!
5.  6 (or maybe 4, or else 3).  Mr. Alfred J. Duncan of Podunk, Montana, submitted an interesting solution to Problem 5. | Answers to Last Fortune's Questions:
50 states, and I had to pick this one...
5th LAW OF THE OFFICE: Vital papers will move from where you left them to where you can't find them.
5" floppy is not better than 3" hard.
5" hard is better than 3" floppy.
6.  There is an interesting solution to this problem on page 1029 of my book, which you can pick up for $23.95 at finer bookstores and bathroom supply outlets (or 99 cents at the table in front of Papyrus Books). | Answers to Last Fortune's Questions:
600 Mb hard disk, 5 Mb free.
63.12% of all statistics are meaningless.
640K ought to be enough for anybody. -- Bill Gates, 1981
667 : Satan's neighbor.
668 - Neighbor of the Beast
69 is fine...but 77'll get me 8 more...
69, 714, 2112 : Sex, drugs, and Rock and Roll !
7 Days without pizza makes one weak...
74% of all statistics are made up on the spot
8 + 8 = 10
8 out of 5 doctors feel it's OK to be skitzo!
80 Mb hard drive... 5 Mb free...
80 meg hard drive...5 megs free...
9 out of 10 dentists recommend oral sex....
9 out of 10 men who tried Camels prefer women.
9.8 m/s}: Not just a good idea; it's the LAW
90% of being smart is knowing what you're dumb at.
90% of everything is crud.
911: Press 1 if robbery. Press 2 if house on fire. Press 3...
9600bps and under are insults to HST'ers | Hacker's law #5
9600bps modem, 1.5bps fingers.
99 blocks of crud on the disk, 99 blocks of crud You patch a bug, and dump it again: 100 blocks of crud on the disk
: FORTH CREATE program that DOES> what is needed . ;
: is not an identifier
:) :D :O :( :[ ;) 8) B) :> |I :P =) :S :B :] :\
:-) I don't wanna, I don't wanna.....Aw zipit kid...(-:
:.::: ::..: ::.::.  :..:: Tagline in Braille
<%>{ 1 fish, <%>{ 2 fish, <%>{ red fish, <%>{ blue fish
<-- Why the funny square?
<----- The information went data way ----->
<<---- THIS SPACE FOR SALE ---->>
<>>>>>>>>>>>>  SURF NAKED  <<<<<<<<<<<<>
<BEEP> Insufficient Memory : Cannot load System Beep
<Baaa baaa... flap flap flap ... whoosh ... thud.>
<Ctrl><Alt><Del> to read the next message
<ERROR><ERROR><ERROR><ERROR><ERROR><ERROR>  {SMACK}  C:\>_
<F6> - Add Tagline
<I>nferior <B>ut <M>arketable
<This page is intentionally left blank.>|IBM
<ZAP> That was *not* manual override.  | Data
==================Taggig linje==================
>> BEER.CAN not found, USER.EXE not loaded <<
>> If you can't be offensive WHY BOTHER?     <<
>>THE PS/2!<< IT'S! hummm, uhhhh IBM COMPATIBLE!
>From listening comes wisdom and from speaking repentance.
>From the creative workshops of Soong, Inc.
>From uucp Mon Dec  3 21:05:46 1979
A "PROGRAM" is used to turn data into error messages.
A .44 magnum beats four aces.
A .45 beats a royal flush EVERY TIME.
A 100% right of return both ways.
A : I don't know  and I don't care.
A BBSer's telephone bill knows no bounds...
A Bird in the hand will doo doo on you.
A Buddist nudist practices yoga bare.
A Bugless Program is an Abstract Theoretical Concept.
A CONS is an object which cares. | Bernie Greenberg.
A Christian is a man who feels repentance on Sunday for what he did on Saturday and is going to do on Monday. Thomas Ybarra
A Computer Programmer is a machine for turning Coke into code.
A Dirty Mind is a Terrible Thing to Waste.
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother. Anonymous
A GOOD friend KEEPS the surplus zucchini!!
A KGB keyboard has no <ESC> key!
A LISP programmer knows the value of everything, but the cost of nothing.
A Law of Computer Programming: 	Make it possible for programmers to write in English and you will find the programmers cannot write in English.
A Long Nose Is Forever.
A PROGRAM is used to turn data into error messages.
A Penny earned is a Penny owed (probably to Uncle Sam).
A Penny earned is a Penny owed.
A Penny saved is a Penny earned. The rest is Uncle Sam's.
A Programmer Is Only As Good As His Units By Other Programmers!
A Puritan is someone who is deathly afraid that someone somewhere is having fun
A Q a day keeps the Borg away.    ......well, maybe not.
A Qmodem is a happy modem!
A RAM is a terrible thing to waste.
A Robin redbreast in a cage puts all heaven in a rage.
A Rolling Stone gathers no moss, but drug convictions are another story.
A STOIC brings the baby; a CYNIC is where you wash it.
A Smith & Wesson *ALWAYS* beats 4 Aces.
A Smith and Wesson beats four aces.
A Stanford research group advertised for participants in a study of obsessive-compulsive disorder. They were looking for therapy clients who had been diagnosed with this disorder. The response was gratifying; they got 3,000 responses about three days after the ad came out.All from the same person. Ano
A Tagline is a terrible thing to waste.
A Tale of Two Zities -Dickens's cookbook
A Thousand points of Broccoli
A UNIX saleslady, Lenore, Enjoys work, but she likes the beach more. She found a good way To combine work and play: She sells C shells by the seashore.
A USRHST-world's most powerful modem-feeling lucky- punk?
A Warriors Drink -- Well that Explains a lot.
A baby is God's opinion that life should go on. Carl Sandburg
A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. Carl Sandburg
A baby is an alimentary canal with a loud voice at one end and no responsibility at the other.
A bachelor enjoys the chase but doesn't eat the game.
A bachelor is a guy who is footloose and fiancee free.
A bachelor is a selfish, undeserving guy who has cheated some woman out of a divorce. | Don Quinn
A bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty and a boy forever. Helen Rowland
A bachelor's life is a fine breakfast, a flat lunch, and a miserable dinner. Jean de La Bruyre
A bad beginning makes for a good ending.
A bad man is worse when he pretends to be a saint. Francis Bacon
A bad workman quarrels with his tools.
A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it rains. Robert Frost
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain.| Mark Twain
A bare assertion is not necessarily the naked truth. George D. Prentice
A bargain is a bargain unless bought from a Ferengi.
A bargain: Something you have to find a use for once you've bought it.
A beard signifies lice, not brains.
A beautiful lady is an accident of nature. A beautiful old lady is a work of art. Louis Nizer
A beautiful woman will enrich your life soon.
A big enough hammer fixes anything.
A big mac, french fries and a large coke
A big mac, french fries and a large coke!
A bigot will not reason, a fool cannot, a slave dare not.
A billion here, a couple of billion there -- first thing you know it adds up to be real money. | Everett McKinley Dirksen
A bird in the bush can't mess in your hand!
A bird in the bush is better than one just overhead.
A bird in the bush usually has a friend in there with him.
A bird in the bush....HURTS!
A bird in the hand can be messy.
A bird in the hand is a big mistake.
A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.
A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush Proverb
A bird in the hand is worth what it will bring.
A bird in the hand makes it awfully hard to blow your Nose
A bird in the hand makes it awfully hard to blow your nose.
A bird in the hand makes it hard to blow your nose.
A bird in the hand might.
A blind man will not thank you for a looking-glass. Thomas Fuller
A bodily disease may be but a symptom of some ailment in the spiritual past. Nathaniel Hawthorne
A book is a mirror: If an ass peers into it, you can't expect an apostle to look out. G. C. Lichtenberg
A book is the only immortality. Rufus Choate
A book might be written on the injustice of the just. Anthony Hope
A bore is a fellow who opens his mouth and puts his feats in it.| Henry Ford
A bore is a person who opens his mouth and puts his feats in it. Henry Ford
A bore is someone who persists in holding his own views after we have enlightened him with ours.
A bore is someone who persists in holding his own views after we have enlightened him with ours. Anonymous
A bottle of wine, boudin rouge, and her!
A boy becomes a man when he walks around a puddle instead of through it.
A boy doesn't have to go to war to be a hero; he can say he doesn't like pie when he sees there isn't enough to go around. Ed Howe
A boy gets to be a man when a man is needed.
A boy is a magical creatureyou can lock him out of your workshop, but you can't lock him out of your heart. Allan Beck
A brain is worth little without a tongue.
A budget is just a method of worrying before you spend money, as well as afterward.
A bug is a feature that didn't make it into the manual.
A bureaucrat is a Democrat who holds some office that a Republican wants. Alben W. Barkley
A bureaucrat is a politician with tenure.
A burnt child dreads the fire. English Proverb
A business that makes nothing but money is a poor kind of business. Henry Ford
A camel is a horse planned by committee.
A can of worms full of Pandora's boxes.
A candidate is a person who gets money from the rich and votes from the poor to protect them from each other.
A careful driver is one who honks his horn when he goes through a red light. Henry Morgan
A cat a day will keep the Salmon away!!
A cat has nine lives, a Trill can have many more.
A cat's purr is the sound of it generating cute.
A catherdral, a wave of storm, a dancer's leap, never turn out to be as high as we had hoped. Marcel Proust
A cats worst enemy is a closed door.
A celebrity is a person who is known for his well-knownness.
A centipede is an ant made to government specs.
A chain is no stronger than its weakest link.
A chicken is an egg's way of producing more eggs.
A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five. Groucho Marx
A choice is always possible, even without any options.
A chubby man with a white beard and a red suit will approach you soon. Avoid him.  He's a Commie.
A church debt is the devil's salary. Henry Ward Beecher
A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won't cross the street to vote in a national election. Bill Vaughan
A city is a large community where people are lonesome together | Herbert Prochnow
A city is a large community where people are lonesome together.
A civil guest will no more talk all, than eat all the feast. George Herheri
A clash of doctrine is not a disaster - it is an opportunity.
A classic is a book that is praised but not read.
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read. Mark Twain
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read. | Mark Twain
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.| Mark Twain
A clean desk is a sign of a -sick- mind
A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
A clean disk is the sign of a warped drive.
A clean, neat, desk is a sign of a sick mind.
A clean, neat, desk is a sign of a very sick mind.
A clear conscience is merely the result of bad memory.
A clear conscience makes a good pillow.
A closed mind gathers no intelligence
A closed mind is like a closed book; just a block of wood Chinese Proverb
A closed mind is like a sealed room - It's going to get awfully stuffy.
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
A closed mouth gathers no feet...
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
A closed mouth, gathers no feet.
A committee has 6 or more legs and no brain.
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
A committee is an animal with a hundred stomachs and no brains.
A committee takes hours to put into minutes what can be done in seconds. Judy Castrina
A company is known by the men it keeps.
A computer program does what you tell it to do, not what you want it to do.
A computer, to print out a fact, Will divide, multiply, and subtract. But this output can be No more than debris, If the input was short of exact. | Gigo
A concept is stronger than a fact. Charlotte P. Gillman
A conclusion is simply the place where someone got tired of thinking.
A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking.
A conclusion is where you got tired of thinking.
A conservative is a man who wants the rules changed so no one can make a pile the way he did. Gregory Nunn
A conservative is one who is too cowardly to fight and too fat to run.
A consultant is someone who asks their client what time it is, writes the answer in a report and charges the client for the privilege.
A cop stopped me for speeding. He said, 'Why were you going so fast?' I said, 'See this thing my foot is on? It's called an accelerator. When you push down on it, it sends more gas to the engine. The whole car just takes right off. And see this thing? This steers it.' Stephen Wright
A country that put men on the moon can't keep cold cereal from getting soggy.
A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. | Ben Franklin
A cow eats without a knife.
A coward is incapable of exhibiting love; it is the prerogative of the brave. Mahatma Gandhi
A critic is a man who leaves no turn unstoned.
A crowd always thinks with its sympathy, never with its reason. William Rounseville Alger
A crowd is not company, and faces are but a gallery of pictures. Francis Bacon
A cruel story runs on wheels, and every hand oils the wheels as they run. Ouida
A crusader's wife slipped from the garrison And had an affair with a Saracen. She was not oversexed, Or jealous or vexed, She just wanted to make a comparison.
A cult is a religion without political power.
A cynic can chill and dishearten with a single word. Ralph Waldo Emerson
A cynic is a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, and not as they ought to be. Ambrose Bierce
A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything, and the value of nothing. Oscar Wilde
A cynic is a man who looks at the world with a monocle in his mind's eye. Carolyn Wells
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin. H. L. Mencken
A cynic is just a man who found out when he was about ten that there wasn't any Santa Claus, and he's still upset. James Gould Cozzens
A cynic is just a man who found out when he was ten that there wasn't any Santa Claus, and he's still upset. J. G. Cozzens
A cynic smells flowers and looks for the casket.
A day for firm decisions  Or is it?
A day for firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
A day not wasted is a day wasted!
A day without radiation is a day without sunshine.
A day without sunshine is like night.
A day without sunshine is like night. Anonymous
A dead man cannot bite.
A desire to resist oppression is implanted in the nature of man. Tacitus
A desk is a wastebasket with drawers.
A diamond is just a lump of coal that made good under pressure.
A diplomat is a man who can convince his wife she'd look stout in a fur coat.
A diplomat is a man who remembers a lady's birthday but forgets her age. Anonymous
A diplomat is a person who can tell you to go to Hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip. Anonymous
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
A diplomat thinks twice before saying nothing.
A diplomat's life is made up of three ingredients: protocol, Geritol and alcohol. Adlai E. Stevenson
A dirty book is rarely dusty.
A dirty book is seldom dusty.
A disc cannot be read as easily as a filing cabinet. Unless you have a computer - which has problems reading a filing cabinet.
A distributed system is one in which the failure of a computer you didn't even know existed can render your own computer unusable. Leslie Lamport, June 1992
A diva who specializes in risqu'e arias is an off-coloratura soprano ...
A doctor's reputation is made by the number of eminent men who die under his care. George Bernard Shaw
A dog is a man's best friend Proverb
A dog is man's best friend because he wags his tail, not his tongue.
A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. | Ogden Nash
A dozen, a gross, and a score, Plus three times the square root of four, Divided by seven, Plus five time eleven, Equals nine squared plus zero, no more.
A drawing pin is an excited Smartie
A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world. Oscar Wilde
A drop of honey catches more flies than a hogshead of vinegar. Proverb
A drunken man's words are a sober man's thoughts.
A fact in itself is nothing. It is valuable only for the idea attached to it, or for the proof which it furnishes. Claude Bernard
A fail-safe circuit will destroy others.
A failure is a man who has blundered but is not able to cash in the experience. Elbert Hubbard
A fair exterior is a silent recommendation.
A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. Ogden Nash
A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject. Sir Winston Churchill
A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject. | Winston Churchill
A farmer: A handy man with a sense of humus!
A fate worse than death : to be married alive.
A father is a banker provided by nature.
A fault recognized is half corrected.
A feature is a bug with seniority.
A fertile mind requires a lot of dirt.
A few cans short of a six pack, Six short.
A few fries short of a Happy Meal.
A few months in the laboratory can save a few hours in the library. Westheimer's Law
A few strong instincts and a few plain rules suffice us. Ralph Waldo Emerson
A filthy Data is Gunked, hosed down and sand blasted.
A financer is a pawnbroker with imagination.
A financier is a pawn-broker with imagination. Arthur Wing Pinero
A financier is a pawnbroker with imagination. Arthur Wing Pinero
A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it. Dogen
A fool always finds a greater fool to admire him.
A fool always finds a greater fool to admire him. Nicolas Boileau-Despraux
A fool and his honey are soon parted.
A fool and his money are SYSOP material.
A fool and his money are my best friends !
A fool and his money are my kind of customer.
A fool and his money are my two favorite people.
A fool and his money are soon parted Proverb
A fool and his money are soon parted.
A fool and his money are soon partying !
A fool and his money is my kind of customer!
A fool and his money rarely get together to start with.
A fool can no more see his own folly than he can see his ears. William Makepeace Thackeray
A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions. Miscellaneous Proverb
A fool finds pleasure in evil conduct, but a man of understanding delights in wisdom. Miscellaneous Proverb
A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control Miscellaneous Proverb A fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent man overlooks an insult. Miscellaneous Proverb
A fool may ask more questions in an hour than a wise man can answer in seven years. English Proverb
A fool must now and then be right by chance.
A fool searches for a greater fool to find admiration.
A fool wants to be king.  A wise man wonders if he can handle the job.
A fool's brain digests philosophy into folly, science into superstition, and art into pedantry.  Hence University education. | G. B. Shaw
A fool-proof method for sculpting an elephant: first, get a huge block of marble; then you chip away everything that doesn't look like an elephant.
A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.
A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds. Ralph Waldo Emerson
A formal parsing algorithm should not always be used. | D. Gries
A fox should not be of the jury at a goose's trial. Thomas Fuller
A friend asks only for your time, not your money.
A friend in need is a friend without Latinum.
A friend in need is a pain in the neck.
A friend in need is a pest indeed.
A friend is one who knows all about you and likes you anyway. Christi Mary Warner
A friend is someone who knows me and likes me anyway.
A friend of mine is into Voodoo Acupuncture. You don't have to go. You'll just be walking down the street, and...........ooooohhhhhh, that's much better... Stephen Wright
A friend of mine once sent me a post card with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space. On the back it said, 'Wish you were here.' Stephen Wright
A friend: someone who likes you even after they know you.
A friennd in need is a friend in deed Proverb
A full bladder is the best alarm clock in the world.
A full cup must be carried steadily. English Proverb
A gentleman can disagree without being disagreeable.
A gentleman will not insult me, and no man not a gentleman can insult me. Frederick Douglass
A gift of flour will soon be made to you.
A gift of flower will soon be made to you.
A gift of flowers will soon be made to you.
A girl a day keeps the wife away.
A girl is Innocence playing in the mud, Beauty standing on its head, and Motherhood dragging a doll by the foot. Allan Beck
A girl's best friend is her mutter.
A gleekzorp without a tornpee is like a quop without a fertsneet (sort of).
A gleekzorp without a tornpee is like a quop without a fertsneet.
A goal to either team would break the deadlock.
A god in hand is worth two in the bush. -- Aaron
A good Windows is a dead Windows -- General Cluster.
A good conscience is a continued Christmas. Benjamin Franklin
A good dog barks when told.
A good husband should be deaf and a good wife should be blind. French Proverb
A good listener is usually thinking about something else. Kin Hubbard
A good many dramatic situations begin with screaming., Jane Fonda
A good memory and a tongue tied in the middle is a combination which gives immortality to conversation. Mark Twain
A good memory does not equal pale ink.
A good memory is one trained to forget the trivial.
A good name, like good will, is got by many actions and lost by one. Lord Jeffery
A good pun is its own reword.
A good reputation is more valuable than money.
A good rooster crows in any hen house.
A good scare is better than good advice.
A good soldier, like a good horse, cannot be of a bad color. Oliver Wendell Holmes
A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water. Sidney Goff
A good way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.
A goose flies by a chart which the Royal Geographical Society could not mend. Oliver Wendell Holmes
A gossip is someone who talks to you about others, a bore is someone who talks to you about himself, and a brilliant conversationalist is one who talks to you about yourself. Lisa Kirk
A government is the only known vessel that leaks from the top. James Reston
A graceful and pleasing figure is a perpetual letter of recommendation. Francis Bacon
A graceful taunt is worth a thousand insults. Louis Nizer
A grave, wherever found, preaches a short and pithy sermon to the soul. Nathaniel Hawthorne
A great civilization is not conquered from without until it has destroyed itself from within. Ariel Durant
A great many family trees were started by grafting.
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. William James
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. | William James
A great obstacle to happiness is to expect too much happiness. Fontenelle
A great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.| Walter Gagehot
A gun gives you the body, not the bird.
A guy has to get fresh once in a while so the girl doesn't lose her confidence.
A guy walks into the chemists and asks: If I melt dry ice and swim in it, will I get wet? | Stevie Wright
A guy with Peaceable Texans for Guns called me the other day to say he was going to kill me. Keith Oakley, Texas State Representative, 1995
A habit of debt is very injurious to the memory. Austin O'Malley
A half moon is better than no moon at all.
A hammer sometimes misses its mark - a bouquet never.
A handful of friends is worth more than a wagon of gold.
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
A happy family is but an earlier heaven. John Bowring
A harp is a nude piano.
A healthy adult male bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people's patience. John Updike
A healthy body is a guest chamber for the soul: a sick body is a prison. Francis Bacon
A heart in love with beauty never grows old. Turkish Proverb
A hearty laugh gives one a dry cleaning, while a good cry is a wet wash. Puzant Kevork Thomajan
A heavy guilt rests upon us for what the whites of all nations have done to the colored peoples. When we do good to them, it is not benevolenceit is atonement. Albert Schweitzer
A hen is only an egg's way of making another egg.
A hen tomorrow is more valuable than an egg today.
A hen who lays an egg cackles as if it was an asteroid.
A hermit is a deserter from the army of humanity
A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is braver five minutes longer. Ralph Waldo Emerson
A holding company is a thing where you hand an accomplice the goods while the policeman searches you. Will Rogers
A hole is nothing at all, but you can break your neck in it. Austin O'Malley
A hole is nothing, but you can break your neck in it.
A home-made friend wears longer than one you buy in the market. Austin O'Malley
A horse  A horse  My kingdom for a horse
A horse!  A horse!  My kingdom for a horse!
A house divided against itself cannot stand. Abraham Lincoln
A house is not a home unless it contains food and fire for the mind as well as the body. Margaret Fuller
A human being is an ingenious assembly of portable plumbing. Christopher Morley
A hunch is creativity trying to tell you something.
A hundred men may make an encampment, but it takes a woman to make a home. Chinese Proverb
A hundred thousand lemmings can't all be wrong.
A hungry man is not a free man. Adlai E. Stevenson
A hungry people listens not to reason, nor cares for justice, nor is bent by any prayers. Seneca
A husband is a bachelor whose luck finally failed...
A hypocrite is one who sets good examples when he has an audience.
A hypocrite is the kind of politician who would cut down a redwood tree, then mount the stump and make a speech for conservation. Adlai E. Stevenson
A jerk present in a group indicates a jerk in charge.
A job is nice but it interferes with my life.
A joke never gains an enemy, but often loses a friend.
A journalist is a grumbler, a censurer, a giver of advice, a regent of sovereigns, a tutor of nations. Four hostile newspapers are more to be feared than a thousand bayonets. Napoleon Bonaparte
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Chinese Proverb
A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.
A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step. Chinese Proverb
A jug is carried under your coat for a dishonest reason.
A kind heart is a fountain of gladness, making everything in its vicinity freshen into smiles. Washington Irving
A kind heart is of little value in chess.
A king is one who has 'few things to desire and many things to fear.' Francis Bacon
A king's castle is his home.
A kiss can be a comma, a question mark or an exclamation point. Mistinguette
A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous. Ingrid Bergman
A kiss is a pleasant reminder that two heads are better than one.
A kiss, when all is said, what is it? A rosy dot placed on the 'i' in loving; 'Tis a secret told to the mouth instead of to the ear. Edmond Rostand
A knowledge of Sanskrit is of little use to a man trapped in a sewer.
A lack of leadership is no substitute for inaction.
A land without ruins is a land without memoriesa land without memories is a land without history. Abram Joseph Ryan
A language that doesn't affect the way you think about programming is not worth knowing.
A language that doesn't have everything is actually easier to program in than some that do. | Dennis M. Ritchie
A large dog will have a surprising effect on your life.
A large number of installed systems work by fiat.  That is, they work by being declared to work. | Anatol Holt
A law is valuable not because it is law, but because there is right in it. Henry Ward Beecher
A lawyer's opinion is worth nothing unless paid for.
A leader who does not hesitate before he sends his nation into battle is not fit to be a leader. Golda Meir
A lean agreement is better than a fat lawsuit. German Proverb
A leap year is never a good sheep year.
A learned fool is more foolish than an ignorant fool.
A lecture on time travel will be held yesterday.
A liar isn't believed even when he speaks the truth.
A liberal is someone too poor to be a capitalist and too rich to be a communist
A lie in time saves nine.
A lie that can be passed off as truth becomes truth.
A life in harmony with nature, the love of truth and virtue, will purge the eyes to understanding her text. Ralph Waldo Emerson
A light wife doth make a heavy husband.
A likely impossibility is always preferable to an unconvincing possibility.
A limerick packs laughs anatomical Into space that is quite economical. But the good ones I've seen So seldom are clean, And the clean ones so seldom are comical.
A lisp programmer knows the value of everything, but the cost of nothing.
A little bit of uh huh and a whole lot of oh yeah.
A little each day is much in a year.
A little experience often upsets a lot of theory. Cadman
A little greed can get you lots of stuff.
A little ignorance can go a long way.
A little ignorance can go a long way. Gerrold's Law
A little inaccuracy saves a lot of explanation.
A little inaccuracy sometimes saves tons of explanation.
A little knowledge is a dangerous thing.
A little knowledge is just that - little...
A little knowledge isn't enough.
A little learning is a dangerous thing; Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring: There shallow draughts intoxicate the brain, And drinking largely sobers us again. -Alexander Pope, An Essay on Criticism
A little neglect may breed great mischief. Benjamin Franklin
A little nukie never hurt anyone
A little of everything is nothing in the main.
A little pot boils easily. Dutch Proverb
A little rebellion now and then ... is a medicine necessary for the sound health of government. Thomas Jefferson
A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal. Oscar Wilde
A little truth helps the lie go down.
A little virtue will never hurt you. -- Piet Hein.
A loaf of bread, a jug of wine and <occupant>.
A long dispute means that both parties are wrong. Voltaire
A long habit of not thinking a thing wrong, gives it a superficial appearance of being right, and raises at first a formidable outcry in defense of custom. But the tumult soon subsides. Time makes more converts than reason. Thomas Paine
A long-forgotten loved one will appear soon.  Buy the negatives at any price.
A lost but happy dream may shed its light upon our waking hours, and the whole day may be infected with the gloom of a dreary or sorrowful one; yet of neither may we be able to recover a trace. Walter de la Mare
A lost ounce of gold may be found, a lost moment of time never.
A lot of advertisers lined up to throw money at this stuff because they were caught up in the hysteria about the Web. But now they want to know how you make money selling a $1.59 bottle of dish detergent on the World Wide Web. Karen Burka, electronic marketing analyst, 1995
A lot of men think that if they smile for a second, somebody will take advantage of them, and they are right. Don Herold
A lot of people I know believe in positive thinking, and so do I. I believe everything positively stinks. | Lew Col
A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls. | Vice President Dan Quayle
A male rite of passage: Writing your name in the snow.
A man always has two reasons for doing anythinga good reason and the real reason. J. P. Morgan
A man can fail many times, but he isn't a failure until he begins to blame somebody else. John Burroughs
A man can never quite understand a boy, even when he has been a boy. Gilbert K. Chesterton
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies. - Oscar Wilde
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies. Oscar Wilde
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies. Oscar Wilde (1854,1900), from The Picture of Dorian Gray
A man cannot spin and reel at the same time.
A man forgives only when he is in the wrong.
A man generally has two reasons for doing a thing. One that sounds good, and a real one. J.Pierpoint Morgan
A man in debt is so far a slave. Ralph Waldo Emerson
A man is a fool is he drinks before he reaches the age of 50, and a fool if he doesn't afterward. Frank Lloyd Wright, american architect
A man is a worker. If he is not that he is nothing. Joseph Conrad
A man is not old as long as he is seeking something. Jean Rostand
A man is not paid for having a head and hands, but for using them. Elbert Hubbard
A man is not where he lives, but where he loves. Latin Proverb
A man is sorry to be honest for nothing. Ovid
A man is too apt to forget that in this world he cannot have everything. A choice is all that is left him. H. Mathews
A man isn't poor if he can still laugh. Raymond Hitchcock
A man may be young in years, yet old in hours.
A man must be both stupid and uncharitable who believes there is no virtue or truth but on his own side. Joseph Addison
A man must consider what a rich realm he abdicates when he becomes a conformist. Ralph Waldo Emerson
A man of great memory without learning hath a rock and a spindle and no staff to spin. George Herbert
A man of maxims only, is like a cyclops with one eye, and that in the back of his head. Samuel Taylor Coleridge
A man once claimed nothing was true; but he was lying
A man paints with his brains and not with his hands.
A man serves best, when he serves himself.
A man should live forever, or die trying.
A man sits as many risks as he runs. Henry David Thoreau
A man travels the world over in search of what he needs and returns home to find it. George Moore
A man travels the world over in search of what he needs, and returns home to find it. George Moore
A man was given two ears and one mouth, to be used in that ratio.
A man who dares to waste one hour of life has not discovered the value of life. Charles Darwin
A man who does not plan long ahead will find trouble right at his door. Confucius
A man who gives his children habits of industry provides for them better than by giving them a fortune. Richard Whately
A man who is not a fool can rid himself of every folly except vanity. Jean Jacques Rousseau
A man who lives, not by what he loves but what he hates, is a sick man. Archibald MacLeishP>
A man who loses his money, gains, at the least, experience, and sometimes, something better. Benjamin Disraeli
A man who steals his neighbor's wife is not alone.
A man who turns green has eschewed protein.
A man who waits to believe in action before acting is anything you like, but he's not a man of action.. You must act as you breathe. Georges Clemenceau
A man whose errors take ten years to correct is quite a man. J. Robert Oppenheimer
A man with 3 buttocks.
A man with a watch knows what time it is. A man with two watches is never sure. Segal's Law
A man with one watch knows what time it is--with two watches he is never sure.
A man without a God is like a fish without a bicycle.
A man without decision can never be said to belong to himself. John Watson Foster
A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small package.
A man's best friends are his ten fingers. Robert Collyer
A man's brain is his Achilles' heel.
A man's country is not a certain area of land, of mountains, rivers, and woods, but it is a principle; and patriotism is loyalty to that principle. George William Curtis
A man's delight in looking forward to and hoping for some particular satisfaction is a part of the pleasure flowing out of it, enjoyed in advance. But this is afterward deducted, for the more we look forward to anything the less we enjoy it when it co Arthur Schopenhauer
A man's feet must be planted in his country, but his eyes should survey the world. George Santayana
A man's first care should be to avoid the reproaches of his own heart, his next to escape the censures of the world. English Proverb
A man's greatness can be measured by his enemies. Don Piatt
A man's house is his hassle.
A man's interest in the world is only an overflow from his interest in himself. George Bernard Shaw
A man's life is interesting primarily when he has failedI well know. For it's a sign that he tried to surpass himself. Georges Clemenceau
A man's only as old as the woman he feels.
A man's own good breeding is the best security against other people's ill manners. Lord Chesterfield
A man's own manner and character is what most becomes him. Cicero
A man's style is his mind's voice. Wooden minds, wooden voices. Ralph Waldo Emerson
A man's worst difficulties begin when he is able to do as he likes. Thomas Huxley
A man, a plan, a canal.  Suez
A man, a plan, a canal.  Suez!
A martyr is a hero who didn't make it.
A mask of gold hides all deformities. Thomas Dekker
A masterly retreat is in itself a victory.
A mathematician is a machine for converting coffee into theorems.
A member of your family will soon do something that will make you proud.
A memorandum is written not to inform the reader, but to protect the writer.
A metaphor is like a simile. Anonymous
A mind is a terrible thing to taste.
A mind is a terrible thing to ugg.. I forogt..
A miser grows rich by seeming poor; an extravagant man grows poor by seeming rich. William Shenstone
A miser is hard to live with, but makes a fine ancestor.
A misery is not to be measured from the nature of the evil, but from the temper of the sufferer Joseph Addison
A misguided platypus will lay its eggs in your shorts.
A miss is as good as a mile Proverb
A misty morning does not signify a cloudy day. Ancient Proverb
A mob is a group of persons with heads but no brains. Thomas Fuller Thomas Fuller
A mob is the scum that rises upmost when the nation boils. John Dryden
A moment's insight is sometimes worth a life's experience. Oliver Wendell Holmes
A moose once bit my sister.
A morning-glory at my window satisfies me more than the metaphysics of books. Walt Whitman
A mortgage casts a shadow on the sunniest field. Robert Green Ingersoll
A mother is not a dust rag.
A mother is not a person to lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary. Dorothy Canfield Fisher
A mountain is climbed a step at a time.
A mouse is an elephant built by the Japanese.
A muth once bit my sister.
A nation is a thing that lives and acts like a man and men are the particulars of which it is composed. Josiah Gilbert Holland
A nation is a totality of men united through community of fate into a community of character. Otto Bauer
A nation never falls but by suicide. Ralph Waldo Emerson
A nation which makes the final sacrifice for life and freedom does not get beaten. Kemal Atatrk
A nation, like a person, has a minda mind that must be kept informed and alert, that must know itself, that understands the hopes and needs of its neighborsall the other nations that live within the narrowing circle of the world. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
A neat desk is a sign of a sick mind.
A new dramatist of the absurd Has a voice that will shortly be heard. I learn from my spies He's about to devise An unprintable three-letter word.
A new scientific truth does not triumph by convincing its opponents and making them see the light, but rather because its opponents eventually die, and a new generation grows up that is familiar with it. Max Planck
A news sense is really a sense of what is important, what is vital, what has color and lifewhat people are interested in. That's journalism. Burton Rascoe
A newspaper is a collection of half-injustices.
A noble choice, but first ...
A nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat
A noisy exhaust to some almost amounts to a mating call.
A nose by any other name would smell.
A nose in artificial manure is not studying nature.
A nuclear war can ruin your whole day.
A nudist has no reason to fear a pickpocket.
A nut that is easy to crack is often empty.
A ounce of pretension = a pound of manure!
A painter told me that nobody could draw a tree without in some sort becoming a tree; or draw a child by studying the outlines of its form merely... but by watching for a time his motions and plays, the painter enters into his nature and can then draw him at every attitude, Ralph Waldo Emerson
A paranoid is a guy who just figured out what's going on.
A pat on the back is only a few inches from a kick in the pants.
A path without obstacles probably leads nowhere.
A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government. Edward Abbey
A peculiar proposition. Of no use to one, yet absolute bliss to two. The small boy gets it for nothing, the young man has to lie for it, and the old man has to buy it. The baby's right, the lover's privilege, and the hypocrite's mask. To a young girl, V.P.I. Skipper
A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
A penny earned is Cheap labor..
A penny for your thoughts ; $20 to act it out.
A penny saved is a Congressional error.
A penny saved is a Governmental oversight.
A penny saved is a penny earned Proverb
A penny saved is a penny earned. The rest is the IRS's.
A penny saved is a penny.
A penny saved is not worth very much.
A penny saved is ridiculous.
A penny saved is ridiculous.
A penny saved is two pence clear, A pin a day's a groat a year. Benjamin Franklin
A penny saved is worthless.
A penny will hide the biggest star in the universe if you hold it close enough to your eye. Samuel Grafton
A period of travel and relaxation when you take twice the clothes and half the money you need. Anonymous
A person is just about as big as the things that make them angry.
A person is never happy except at the price of some ignorance. Anatole France
A person never tells you anything until contradicted.
A person slow to anger is better than the mighty.
A person who can't pay, gets another person who can't pay, to guarantee that he can pay. Charles Dickens
A person who is too nice an observer of the business of the crowd, like one who is too curious in observing the labor of bees, will often be stung for his curiosity. Alexander Pope
A person who talks fast often says things she hasn't thought of yet. Caron Warner Lieber
A person with a bad name is already half-hanged. Proverb
A person without a navel lives within all of us.
A person's age is not dependent upon the number of years that have passed over his head, but on the number of colds that have passed through it. Shirley W. Wynne
A perversion of nature....how exciting!
A pessimist complains about the noise when opportunity knocks.
A pessimist is a man who has been compelled to live with an optimist. Elbert Hubbard
A pessimist is never disappointed.
A pessimist is one who feels bad when he feels good for fear he'll feel worse when he feels better. Anonymous
A pessimist is one who has been intimately acquainted with an optimist. Elbert Hubbard
A phaser is the universal communicator. | Worf
A phaser on stun is like a day without orange juice.
A physicist is an atom's way of knowing about atoms. | George Wald
A piano is a piano is a piano. | Gertrude Steinway.
A picture is worth a thousand words; a slide show is both.
A pig bought on credit is forever grunting. Spanish Proverb
A pill a day keeps the stork away.
A pitcher that goes to a well too often is broken first.
A place for everything and everything in its place Proverb
A place for everything, everything in its place. Benjamin Franklin
A plucked goose does not lay golden eggs.
A plucked goose doesn't lay golden eggs.
A point of view: an ulcer is wonderful to a pathologist. Austin O'Malley
A political career brings out the basest qualities in human nature. Lord Bryce
A politician is a man who understands government and it takes a politician to run a government. A statesman is a politician who's been dead for fifteen years. Harry S Truman
A politician thinks of the next election; a statesman, of the next generation. J. F. Clarke
A poor excuse is better than no excuse at all.
A poor excuse is better than no excuse! <grin>
A poor excuse is better than no excuse.
A poor life this if, full of care, we have no time to stand and stare. William Henry Davies
A poor man who eats too much, as contradistinguished from a gourmand, who is a rich man who 'lives well.' Elbert Hubbard
A popular Government, without popular information, or the means of acquiring it, is but a Prologue to a Farce or a Tragedy; or, perhaps both. Knowledge will forever govern ignorance: And a people who mean to be their own Governors, must arm themselves with the power which knowledge gives. James Madison
A pound of pluck is worth a ton of luck. James A. Garfield
A prejudice is a vagrant opinion without visible means of support. Ambrose Bierce
A present, over which you will shed tears of joy.
A pretty .GIF is like a melody.
A private sin is not so prejudicial in the world as a public indecency.
A procrastinator's work is never done.
A professional is one who does a good job even when he doesn't feel like it.
A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep.
A programmer's work is never done.
A programmer's work is never done. <Sigh!>
A programming language is low-level when its programs require attention to the irrelevant.
A project not worth doing at all is not worth doing well.
A promise must never be broken. Alexander Hamilton
A propagandist is a specialist in selling attitudes and opinions. Hans Speier
A proud man is seldom a grateful man, for he never thinks he gets as much as he deserves. Henry Ward Beecher
A proverb is a short sentence based on long experience. Miguel de Cervantes
A prudent question is one-half of wisdom. Francis Bacon
A psychiatrist is a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free.
A punishment to some, to some a gift, and to many a favor. Seneca
A quarrelsome man never lacks words.
A quarter-ounce of chocolate = four pounds of fat. | Slick's Law of the Universe
A radical is a man with both feet firmly planted in the air. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
A radical is one who speaks the truth. Charles A. Lindbergh
A radical man: Someone with both feet planted firmly in the air.
A real book is not one that we read, but one that reads us. W. H. Auden
A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works.
A real person has two reasons for doing anything ... a good reason and the real reason.
A reasonable man accomplishes nothing.
A red light means the next six cars may go through the intersection. | Rules for driving in New York
A red nose can be the result of sunshine or moonshine.
A reformer is a man who rides through a sewer in a glass-bottomed boat. James J. Walker
A relationship is like a shark.  It has to keep moving forward or it dies.
A religious life is a struggle and not a hymn. Madame de Sta'l
A reputation once broken may possibly be repaired, but the world will always keep their eyes on the spot where the crack was. Joseph Hall
A retentive memory is a good thing, but the ability to forget is the true token of greatness. Elbert Hubbard
A rich man has no need of character. Hebrew Proverb
A right delayed is a right denied.
A riot is a spontaneous outburst. A war is subject to advance planning. Richard M. Nixon
A road map always tells you everything except how to refold it.
A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral. | Antoine de Saint-Exupery
A rolling disk gathers no mos.
A rolling fat woman gathers no flour.
A rolling stone gathers momentum.
A rolling stone gathers momentum. Anonymous
A rolling stone gathers no moss Proverb
A rolling stone gathers no moss.
A room without books is like a body without a soul. Cicero
A sadder and a wiser man, He rose the morrow morn. Samuel Taylor Coleridge
A school without football is in danger of deteriorating into a medieval study hall. Vince Lombardi
A second class effort is a first class mistake.
A seminar on Time Travel will be held two weeks ago
A seminar on Time Travel will be held two weeks ago.
A senior always feels like the university is going to the kids. Tom Masson
A sense of the value of timethat is, of the best way to divide one's time into one's various activitiesis an essential preliminary to efficient work; it is the only method of avoiding hurry. Arnold Bennett
A sentimentalist is simply one who desires to have the luxury of an emotion without paying for it. Oscar Wilde
A sequel is an admission that you've been reduced to imitating yourself. Don Marquis
A serious writer is not to be confounded with a solemn writer. A serious writer may be a hawk or a buzzard or even a popinjay, but a solemn writer is always a bloody owl. Ernest Hemingway
A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for. John A. Shedd
A short saying often contains much wisdom. Sophocles
A shortcut is the longest distance between two points.
A shortcut is the longest path between two points.
A sick mind is not necessarily the sign of a clean desk.
A simple idea will be worded in the most complicated way.
A sine curve goes off to infinity or at least the end of the blackboard | Prof. Steiner
A single bad habit will mar an otherwise faultless character, as an ink-drop soileth the pure white page. Hosea Ballou
A single conversation across the table with a wise man is worth a months study of books.| Chinese Proverb
A single conversation with a wise man is better than ten years of study. Chinese Proverb
A single fact can spoil a good argument.
A single man has not nearly the value he would have in a state of union. He is an incomplete animal. He resembles the odd half of a pair of scissors. Benjamin Franklin
A slander is like a hornet; if you can't kill it dead the first time, better not strike at it. Josh Billings
A sleeping fox counts hens in his dreams.
A slight touch of friendly malice and amusement towards those we love keeps our affections for them from turning flat. Logan P. Smith
A small debt produces a debtor; a large one, an enemy. Publilius Syrus
A small good deed is better than the grandest intention.
A small leak will sink a great ship.
A small leak will sink a great ship. Benjamin Franklin
A smile is a curve that can set a lot of things straight.
A snake deserves no pity. Yiddish Proverb
A snake lurks in the grass.
A sneer is the weapon of the weak. James Russell Lowell
A sobering thought: what if, at this very moment, I am living up to my full potential? Jane Wagner
A social life? What board can I download THAT from?
A soft drink turneth away company.
A soft drink turneth away company.You're all over it, like a cheap suit.
A solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg who looked like he was waiting for a vacancy in the Trinity. | Mark Twain
A speculator is a man who observes the future, and acts before it occurs. Bernard M. Baruch
A spoonful of honey will catch more flies than a gallon of vinegar.
A stage? No, this is not a stage.
A stale article, if you dip it in a good, warm, sunny smile, will go off better than a fresh one that you've scowled upon. Nathaniel Hawthorne
A statesman shears the sheep; the politician skins them.
A stich in time saves nine, but does that include temporal anomolys?
A stiff neck usually supports an empty head.
A still tongue makes a wise head.
A stitch in time saves nine Proverb
A stitch in time saves nine.
A stitch in time would have confused Einstein.
A straw vote only shows which way the hot air blows. O. Henry
A straw vote only shows which way the hot air blows. | O'Henry
A strip of Latinum for your thoughts.
A strong, positive self-image is the best possible preparation for success. Dr Joyce Brothers
A student who changes the course of history is probably taking an exam.
A stumble may prevent a fall.
A successful baseball player gets a hit only once out of every three tries.
A successful marriage is an edifice that must be rebuilt every day. Andre Maurois
A successful tool is one that was used to do something undreamed of by its author. | S. C. Johnson
A surprised Data is propositioned by the E's Computer.
A surprised Data is propositioned by the Enterprise's Computer.
A sweater is a garment worn by a child when his mother feels chilly.
A sympathetic heart is like a spring of pure water bursting forth from the mountain side. Anonymous
A tart temper never mellows with age; and a sharp tongue is the only edged tool that grows keener with constant use. Washington Irving
A taste for irony has kept more hearts from breaking than a sense of humor for it takes irony to appreciate the joke which is on oneself. Jessamyn West
A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops. Henry Brooks Adams
A teetotaller makes the worst drunkard.
A ten-gallon hat really holds only three-fourths of a gallon.
A theory is better than its explanation.
A theory is no more like a fact than a photograph is like a person. Ed Howe
A theory must be tempered with reality. Jawaharlal Nehru
A thick head can do as much damage as a hard heart.
A thief believes that everybody steals.
A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.
A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it. Oscar Wilde
A thing is not vulgar merely because it is common William Nazlitt
A thing not looked for is seldom found.
A thing not worth doing is worth not doing well.
A thing of beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
A thing of shreds and zatches.
A thing worth doing is worth the trouble of asking somebody else to do it.
A thousand words will not leave so deep an impression as one deed. Henrik Ibsen
A threefold cord is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:12
A timid man has little chance.
A timid person is frightened before a danger, a coward during the time, and a courageous person afterwards. Jean Paul Richter
A tool is but the extension of a man's hand, and a machine is but a complex tool. And he that invents a machine augments the power of a man and the well-being of mankind. Henry Ward Beecher
A tool is but the extension of a man's hand, and a machine is but a complex tool. He that invents a machine augments the power of man and the well-being of mankind. Henry Ward Beecher
A total abstainer is one who abstains from everything but abstention, and especially from inactivity in the affairs of others. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
A tough lesson in life that one has to learn is that not everybody wishes you well. Dan Rather
A transistor protected by a fast-acting fuse will protect the fuse by blowing first.
A tree never hits an automobile except in self defense. American Proverb
A trouble shared is a trouble halved.
A true diplomat struts sitting down.
A true man of honor feels humbled himself when he cannot help humbling others. Robert E. Lee
A true victory requirest at the very least an antagonist and a battle; anything less is but a takeover.
A truly lazy person is never bored.
A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a Unicorn.
A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a moose.
A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.
A truly wise person never plays leapfrog with a Unicorn.
A turkey roast is a foul ball...
A type II phaser beats four aces. -- Worf (on a bad poker night)
A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students. | John Ciardi
A university should be a place of light, of liberty, and of learning. Benjamin Disraeli
A vacation is over when you begin to yearn for your work. Morris Fishbein
A vacuum is a hell of a lot better than some of the stuff that nature replaces it with. | Tenessee Williams
A vain man finds it wise to speak good or ill of himself; a modest man does not talk of himself. Jean de La Bruyre
A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.
A very intelligent turtle Found programming UNIX a hurdle The system, you see, Ran as slow as did he, And that's not saying much for the turtle.
A victim of a prank, Geordi puts a banana over his eyes
A violent man will die a violent death.
A virtuoso is a musician with real high morals.
A virtuous life is its own punisment.
A visit to a fresh place will bring strange work.
A visit to a strange place will bring fresh work.
A vivid and creative mind characterizes you.
A vow is a snare for sin. Samuel Johnson
A vow is fixed and unalterable determination to do a thing, when such a determination is related to something noble which can only uplift the man who makes the resolve. Mahatma Gandhi
A waist is a terrible thing to mind.
A want is a need with priority.
A waste is a terrible thing to mind.
A watched pot never boils Proverb
A weak mind is like a microscope, which magnifies trifling things but cannot receive great ones. Lord Chesterfield
A well adjusted person is one who makes the same mistake twice without getting nervous.
A well-crafted tagline is a joy forever.
A well-known friend is a treasure.
A well-written life is as rare as a well-spent one.
A wholesome mind is wasted potential.
A wicked book cannot repent. Old Proverb
A wife is a gift bestowed upon man to reconcile him to the loss of paradise. Johann Wolfgang von Goetke
A wife is essential to great longevity; she is the receptacle of half a man's cares, and two-thirds of his ill-humor. Charles Reade
A wise Ferengi changes his mind. A fool never will.
A wise government knows how to enforce with temper, or to conciliate with dignity, but a weak one is odious in the former, and contemptible in the latter. George Greenville
A wise man can see more from a mountain top than a fool can from the bottom of a well.
A wise man cares not for what he cannot have. Jack Herbert
A wise man changes his mind, a fool never.
A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends.| Baltasar Gracian
A wise man has something to say, a fool has to say something.
A wise man may look ridiculous in the company of fools.
A wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.
A wise man once said.... I don't know...
A wise man will live as much within his wit as within his income. Lord Chesterfield
A wise man will make more opportunities than he finds. Francis Bacon
A wise neuter joins with neither, but uses both as his honest interest leads him. William Penn
A wise old owl sat on an oak; The more he saw the less he spoke; The less he spoke the more he heard; Why aren't we like that wise old bird? Edward H. Richards
A wise person makes his own decisions, a weak one obeys public opinion.
A wise person sees as much as ought, not as much can.
A wok is what you throw at a wabbit.
A woman never forgets her sex.  She would rather talk with a man than an angel, any day. - O.W. Holmes
A woman of honor should not expect of others things she would not do herself. Marguerite De Valois
A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.| The difference between men & women
A woman who can't forgive should never have more than a nodding acquaintance with a man. Ed Howe
A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
A woman's guess is much more accurate than a man's certainty. Rudyard Kipling
A woman's hopes are woven of sunbeams; a shadow annihilates them. George Eliot
A woman's life is a history of the affections. Washington Irving
A woman's work is never done.
A womans work is never done, and a Bajorans doubly so.
A wonder last but nine days, but Ferengi's are quick salesmen.
A wonderful discoverypsychoanalysis. Makes quite simple people feel they're complex. Samuel N. Behrman
A word is not a crystal, transparent and unchanged, it is the skin of a living thought and may vary greatly in color and content according to the circumstances and the time in which it is used. Oliver Wendell Holmes
A word to the wise is enough.
A world of facts lies outside and beyond the world of words. Thomas Huxley
A writer must not shift your point of view.
A yawn is a silent shout.
A year spent in artificial intelligence is enough to make one believe in God.
A young boy is a theory, an old man is a fact. Ed Howe
A young man who does not have what it takes to perform military service is not likely to have what it takes to make a living. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
A zygote is a gamete's method of producing more gametes.
A PROGRAM is used to turn data into error messages.
A)bort R)etry G)et a stick and kill it.
A)bort, R)etry or S)elf-destruct?
A*C, who said A*C?
A. "Yes, but it is generally better to take it for a walk."
A:  I don't know  and I don't care.
AAAAA - American Association Against Acronym Abuse
AAAAA: American Association Against Acronym Abuse
AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA !!!
AAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaccccccccckkkkkk You brute  Knock before entering a ladies room
AAcckk !! II''mm iinn hhaallff dduupplleexx !!
ABORT: Drivel filter is compromised
ABORT: Drivel filter is compromised!
ACADEMY, n. [from ACADEME] A modern school where football is taught. Ambrose Bierce
ACTING: The most minor of gifts and not a very high class way to earn a living. After all, Shirley Temple could do it at the age of four. Katherine Hepburn
ADA, n.: Something you need only know the name of to be an Expert in Computing.  Useful in sentences like, "We had better develop an ADA awareness."
ADMIN - An Essential Information Resource
ADMIRATION, n.: Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves. Ambrose Bierce
AGGHHhhh, 4 AM Already !
AIBOHPHOBIA - the fear of palindromes.
AIDS -- The Plague Denied by the ACLU the AMA and man!
ALERT! ALERT! No, wait! It's TWO lerts!
ALEXANDER BELL'S THEOREM: When a body is immersed in water, the phone rings.
ALL PRICES INCLUDE POSTAGE IN THE U.S.
ALL-PURPOSE EXCUSE:It seemed like a good idea at the time
AMAZING BUT TRUE ... If all the salmon caught in Canada in one year were laid end to end across the Sahara Desert, the smell would be absolutely awful.
AMAZING BUT TRUE ... There is so much sand in Northern Africa that if it were spread out it would completely cover the Sahara Desert.
AND, it frees my palm to do other things!
ANTIQUE STRIPPER TO DISPLAY WARES AT STORE
ARCHITECTURE: The art of how to waste space. Philip Johnson
ARG n. Abbreviation for "argument" (to a function), used so often as to have become a new word.
ARIES (Mar 21 - Apr 19) You are the pioneer type and hold most people in contempt.  You are quick tempered, impatient, and scornful of advice.  You are not very nice.
ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH
ARTHUR'S LAW OF LOVE: People to whom you are attracted think you remind them of someone else.
ASCII and it shall be given unto you.
ASCII and ye shall receive.
ASCII stupid question, get stupid ANSI
ASCII stupid question... get a stupid ANSI
ASTROLOGY LAW: It's always the wrong time of the month.
ATWOOD'S FOURTEENTH COROLLARY: No books are lost by lending except those you particularly wanted to keep.
AUTOEXEC.BAT = Lee Iacocca as a vampire.
Aaarrrggghhh... 4 AM already !
Abandon all hope ye who have entered cyberspace.
Abandon all hope, ye who press  here.
Abandon all hope, ye who press enter here.
Abandon hope all ye who press ENTER here.
Abandon hope, all ye who <ENTER> here !
Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy.
Ability Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do the work. John G. Pollard
Ability hits the mark where presumption overshoots and diffidence falls short. John Henry Newman
Ability is a poor man's wealth. M. Wren
Ability is nothing without opportunity. Napoleon Bonaparte
Ability is of little account without opportunity. Napoleon Bonaparte
Ability may get you to the top, but it takes character to keep you there. John Wooden
Abort, Retry, Fail?| Microsoft
Abortion is a miscarriage of justice.
About all some men accomplish in life is to send a son to Harvard.
About as useful as an Ashtray on a Motorbike !
About the only thing on a farm that has an easy time is the dog.
About the only thing we have left that actually discriminates in favor of the plain people is the stork. Kin Hubbard
About the time we think we can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends. | Herbert Hoover
Above all else - sky.
Above all things, reverence yourself.
Abrasive - A fine mesh for sifting female undergarments.
Absence and death are the sameonly that in death there is no suffering. Walter S. Landor
Absence diminishes little passions and increases great ones, as wind extinguishes candles and fans a fire. Franois de la Rochefoucauld
Absence makes the dick grow longer.
Absence makes the heart go wander.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder Proverb
Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Absence of Evidence is not Evidence of Absence
Absence of occupation is not rest; A mind quite vacant is a mind distressed. William Cowper
Absent, adj.: Exposed to the attacks of friends and acquaintances; defamed; slandered.
Absentee, n.: A person with an income who has had the forethought to remove himself from the sphere of exaction. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Absolute liberty is absence of restraint; responsibility is restraint; therefore, the ideally free individual is responsible to himself. Henry Brooks Adams
Abstain from beans.
Abstain from wine, women and song. Mostly song.
Abstainer, n.: A weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Abstaining is favorable both to the head and the pocket. Horace Greeley
Abstenence makes the heart grow fonder.
Abstinence is a good thing if practiced in moderation.
Abstinence makes the heart grow fondler.
Abstract art is a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered. - Al Capp
Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Abundance, like want, ruins many. Romanian Proverb
Abuse is the weapon of the vulgar. Samuel Griswold Goodrich
Abuse of power comes as no surprise.
Academy: A modern school where football is taught.
Accelerate Windows - drop the disks into a Black Hole.
Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with whom fate brings you together, but do so with all your heart. Marcus Aurelius
Access denied--nah nah na nah nah!
Accident, n.: A condition in which presence of mind is good, but absence of body is better.
Accidents cause History.
Accidents cause people.
Accolade - An effervescent fruit cordial made from Accos.
According to my best recollection, I don't remember. | Vincent "Jimmy Blue Eyes" Alo
According to the latest official figures, 43% of all statistics are totally worthless.
Accordion, n.: A bagpipe with pleats.
Accountant - someone who can put two and two together and make a living from it.
Accumulate mannequins now; spare parts will be in short supply on D-Day. | Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
Accuracy is the twin brother of honesty; inaccuracy, of dishonesty. Charles Simmons
Accuracy is to a newspaper what virtue is to a lady, but a newspaper can always print a retraction. Adlai E. Stevenson
Accuracy of statement is one of the first elements of truth; inaccuracy is a near kin to falsehood. Tryon Edwards
Accuracy, n.: The vice of being right
Acetone = What you do in exercise class...
Achievement, n. the death of endeavor and the birth of disgust. - Ambrose Bierce
Acid -- better living through chemistry.
Acid Rain - Not as groovey as it sounds.
Acid absorbs 47 times it's weight in excess Reality.
Acorns were good until bread was found. Francis Bacon
Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Acquaintance: a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor or obscure, and intimate when he is rich or famous. Ambrose Bierce
Acquaintance: a person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. Ambrose Bierce
Acquire - A group of singers commonly found in churches.
Act nothing in furious passion. It's putting to sea in a storm. Thomas Fuller
Acting is like roller skating. Once you know how to do it, it is neither stimulating nor exciting. George Sanders
Acting is the most minor of gifts. After all, Shirley Temple could do it when she was four. Katharine Hepburn
Acting without thinking is like shooting without aiming.
Action and care will in time wear down the strongest frame, but guilt and melancholy are poisons of quick dispatch. Thomas Paine
Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action. Benjamin Disraeli
Action to be effective must be directed to clearly conceived ends. Jawaharlal Nehru
Actions are neither as good nor as evil as impulses.
Actions are usually right, but the reasons seldom are.
Actions from sanity are not necessarily from feeling.
Actions lie louder tha words. Carolyn Wells
Actions speak louder than words & Bajorans don't bother with smalltalk.
Actions speak louder than words -- but not so often.
Actions speak louder than words Proverb
Activity is the politician's substitute for achievement.
Actors will happen in the best-regulated families.
Actually it is an interplanetary greeting.
Actually, the Church of the Subgenius was started on a bet between two guys "Stang" and "Drummond" after the Jonestown deaths.  They modeled it after Scientology.
Actually, there IS a banana in my pocket...
Acute Angle - A very attractive early Briton.
Adam and Eve had many advantages, but the principal one was that they escaped teething.
Adam and Eve had many advantages, but the principal one was that they escaped teething. Mark Twain
Adam ate the apple, and our teeth still ache.
Adam ate the apple, and our teeth still ache. Hungarian Proverb
Adaptability is not imitation. It means power of resistance and assimilation. Mahatma Gandhi
Addiction - The process by which one becomes a dick.
Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.
Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later. Laws of Computer Programming, X
Adding manpower to a late software project only makes it later.
Admiration is a very short-lived passion, that immediately decays upon growing familiar with its object. Joseph Addison
Admiration is the daughter of ignorance. Benjamin Franklin
Admiration, n.: Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.| Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Admiration: Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.
Admiration: Polite recognition of self-reflection.
Admonish your friends privately, but praise them openly.
Adolescence is that period of time between puberty and adultery.
Adolescence is when children start bringing up their parents.
Adolescence, n.: The stage between puberty and adultery.
Adolescence: the stage between puberty and adultery.
Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Adore, v.: To venerate expectantly. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Adult, n.: One old enough to know better.
Adult:  One old enough to know better.
Advancement in position.
Adventure is not outside a man; it is within. David Grayson
Adventure is the champagne of life.
Adventure is worthwhile in itself. Amelia Earhart
Adversity is the first path to truth. Lord Byron
Adversity makes a man wise, not rich. Romanian Proverb
Adversity makes men, and prosperity makes monsters. Victor Hugo
Adversity makes people wise but not rich.
Adversity reveals genius, prosperity conceals it.| Horace
Advertisement: the most truthful part of a newspaper.
Advertising is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission. - Fred Allen
Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission. Fred Allen
Advertising is a valuable economic factor because it is the cheapest way of selling goods, especially if they are worthless. Sinclair Lewis
Advertising is the foot on the accelerator, the hand on the throttle, the spur on the flank that keeps our economy surging forward. Robert W. Sarnoff
Advertising is the life of trade. Calvin Coolidge
Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it. Stephen Butler Leacock
Advertising promotes that divine discontent which makes people strive to improve their economic status. Ralph S. Butler
Advertising raises the standard of living by raising the standard of longing.
Advice is a dangerous commodity.
Advice is a dangerous gift; be cautious about giving and receiving it.
Advice is easier than helping.
Advice is free: The right answer will cost plenty.
Advice is least heeded when most needed. English Proverb
Advice is like castor oil, easy enough to give but dreadful uneasy to take. Josh Billings
Advice is like snow; the softer it falls the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into the mind. Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Advice is seldom welcome, and those who need it the mosost, like it the least. Lord Chesterfield
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't. Erica Jong
Advice: 5 And Worth Every Penny!
Advice: Something we test out on others to see if it really works.
Advice: the smallest current coin. Ambrose Bierce
Advisor: The guy who told you how to screw up
Adweanne| Rocky
Aern't spill chukkers grate?
Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn't know that so it goes on flying anyway. Mary Kay Ash
Affection, like melancholy, magnifies trifles; but the magnifying of the one is like looking through a telescope at heavenly objects; that of the other, like enlarging monsters with a microscope. Leigh Hunt
Affirmative action rewards underachievement.
Affliction comes to us, not to make us sad but sober; not to make us sorry but wise. Henry Ward Beecher
Affliction, like the iron-smith, shapes as it smites. Christian Nestell Bovee
After I run your program, let's make love like crazed weasels, OK?
After a long bath Worf sees the fleas as his true friends
After a number of decimal places, nobody gives a damn.
After all is said and done, a lot more has been said than done.
After all is said and done, usually more is said than done.
After all, all he did was string together a lot of old, well-known quotations. | H. L. Mencken, on Shakespeare
After all, what is your hosts' purpose in having a party?  Surely not for you to enjoy yourself; if that were their sole purpose, they'd have simply sent champagne and women over to your place by taxi. | P. J. O'Rourke
After an access cover has been secured by 16 hold-down screws, it will be discovered that the gasket has been omitted. de la Lastra's Corollary
After an instrument has been assembled, extra components will be found on the bench.
After dark all cats are leopards. Native American Proverb (Zuni)
After dinner rest a while, after supper walk a mile.
After dinner, he said : Your modem or mine ?
After endless days of commuting on the freeway to an antiseptic, sealed-window office, there is a great urge to backpack in the woods and build a fire. Charles Krauthammer, in Time Magazine, 1996
After four decimal places, nobody gives a damn.
After much thought Picard assumes the bowling ball phase.
After silence that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music. Aldous Huxley
After the last of 16 mounting screws has been removed from an access cover, it will be discovered that the wrong access cover has been removed.
After the last of 16 mounting screws has been removed from an access cover, it will be discovered that the wrong access cover has been removed. de la Lastra's Law
After the storm comes a calm.
After they make styrofoam, what do they ship it in? Stephen Wright
After things have gone from bad to worse, the cycle will repeat itself.
After three days men grow weary of a wench, a guest, and rainy weather. -- Benjamin Franklin
After three days without reading, talk becomes flavorless. Chinese proverb
After victory, tighten your helmet chord. Japanese Proverb
After we pull the pin, Mr. Grenade is NOT our friend
After we pull the pin, Mr. Grenade is NOT our friend!
Afternoon very favorable for romance.  Try a single person for a change.
Afternoon, n.: That part of the day we spend worrying about how we wasted the morning.
Against stupidity, the Gods themselves, contend in vain !
Age 'n Treachery Overcome Youth 'n Skill
Age ... is a matter of feeling, not of years. George William Curtis
Age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill.
Age before beauty; and pearls before swine. -- Dorothy Parker
Age does not depend upon years, but upon temperament and health. Some men are born old, and some never grow so. Tryon Edwards
Age is a high price to pay for maturity.
Age is something that doesn't matter, unless you are a cheese. Billie Burke
Age isn't important unless you're a cheese.
Agethat period of life in which we compound for the vices that we still cherish by reviling those that we no longer have the enterprise to commit. Ambrose Bierce
Aggression which is flagitious when committed by one, is not sanctioned when committed by a host. Herbert Spencer
Agitation is that part of our intellectual life where vitality results; there ideas are born, breed and bring forth. George E. Woodberry
Agitation is the marshalling of the conscience of a nation to mold its laws. Robert Peel
Agnosticism is the philosophical, ethical and religious dry-rot of the modern world. F. E. Abbot
Agnosticism simply means that a man shall not say he knows or believes that for which he has no grounds for professing to believe. Thomas Huxley
Agrimony - What a divorced farmer pays his ex-wife.
Ah blow my nose at you, so-called 'Arthur Keeeng'!
Ah come on, just this one last little feature...
Ah fart in your general direction!
Ah well, they say it's not as bad as they say it is......
Ah! Don't say that you agree with me. When People agree with me I always feel that I must be wrong. Oscar Wilde
Ah, but a man's reach should exceed his grasp, Or what's a heaven for? Robert Browning
Ah, come on, just this one last little feature.
Ah, come on, just this one last little feature...
Ah, my trombone.  Let me show you how it works. | Riker
Ah, what a dusty answer gets the soul when hot for certainties in this our life! George Meredith
Ah-ooooh, where was the thunder?
Aha!  Now we see the violence inherent in the system!
Ahah
Ahah!
Ahead warp factor one, Mr. Sulu.
Aibohphobia - the fear of palindromes.
Aim at perfection in everything, though in most things it is unattainable. However, they who aim at it, and persevere, will come much nearer to it than those whose laziness and despondency make them give it up as unattainable. Lord Chesterfield
Aim at the sun, and you may not reach it; but your arrow will fly far higher than if aimed at an object on a level with yourself. Joel Hawes
Ain't WP Macro's *FUN*...!!!
Ain't Winter Grand?
Ain't nerd-life grand?
Ain't no horse can't be rode; ain't no cowboy can't be throwed.
Air Geordis - TNG footwear
Air bags...Inflation we can live with!
Air conditioned environment - Do not open Windows.
Air controllers nightmare: A pack of F-117s landing.
Air is water with holes in it
Air pollution is a mist demeanor.
Alas, I am dying beyond my means. | Oscar Wilde, as he sipped champagne on his deathbed
Alas, how love can trifle with itself
Alas, how love can trifle with itself!
Albatross!
Albatross, get your albatross ....
Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life. George Bernard Shaw
Aleph sub alpha is the alpha'th aleph.
Aleph-null bottles of beer on the wall, Aleph-null bottles of beer, You take one down, and pass it around, Aleph-null bottles of beer on the wall.
Alex Haley was adopted
Alex Haley was adopted!
Alex, I'll take "Things Only I Know" for $1000.
Alexander Graham Bell is alive and well in New York, and still waiting for a dial tone.
Alexander Hamilton originated the put and take system in our national treasury: the taxpayers put it in, and the politicians take it out. Will Rogers
Algol is not just a star.
Algorithm is a set of instructions. E.g. How to use the telephone: If 'phone not working' then 'phone operator.'
Alimony : the fee a woman charges for name-dropping.
Alimony and bribes will engage a large share of your wealth.
Alimony is a system by which, when two people make a mistake, one of them keeps paying for it. | Peggy Joyce
Alimony is having to say you're sorry once a month.
Alimony: the fee a woman charges for name-dropping
All Hail Discordia!
All I ask for is an opportunity to prove that money doesn't buy happiness.
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
All I ask of life is a constant and exaggerated sense of my own importance.
All I did was press E-N-T-E-R, like the screen said!?!?
All I need to know I learned from my cat.
All I want is a warm bed, a kind word and unlimited power
All Voles are grey in the dark.
All [the girls] I meet at work are sluts and lawyers."  Bull
All adventures, especially into new territory, are scary. Sally Ride
All animals are equal, some more than others.
All answers questioned here.
All art is but imitation of nature.
All art is quite useless.
All babies speak Klingonese
All celebrated people lose dignity on a close view. Napoleon Bonaparte
All computers wait at the same speed.
All concord's born of contraries. Ben Jonson
All crime is a kind of disease and should be treated as such. Mahatma Gandhi
All cruelty springs from hard-heartedness and weakness. Seneca
All decent people live beyond their incomes; those who aren't respectable live beyond other people's; a few gifted individuals manage to do both. Saki
All deception in the course of life is indeed nothing else but a lie reduced to practice, and falsehood passing from words into things. Robert South
All diagnostics are fatal.
All easy problems have already been solved. Anonymous
All for one and one for ONE !
All for one and one for all Proverb
All for one; more for me!
All for one; one for all. Alexander Dumas
All for one; one for all; ME above all!
All frauds, like the wall daubed with untempered mortar ... always tend to the decay of what they are devised to support. Richard Whately
All free governments are managed by the combined wisdom and folly of the people. James A. Garfield
All generalizations are bad.
All generalizations are false.
All good things are cheap: all bad are very dear. Henry David Thoreau
All good work is done the way ants do things, Little by little. Lafcadio Hearn
All government is theft, some just steal less.
All great discoveries are made by accident.
All great ideas are controversial, or have been at one time.
All history is a record of the power of minorities, and of minorities of one. Ralph Waldo Emerson
All honor's wounds are self-inflicted. Andrew Carnegie
All hope abandon, ye who enjoy tax forms.
All hope abandon, ye who enter here.
All hope abandon, ye who enter messages here.
All human activity is prompted by desire. Bertrand Russell
All human discoveries seem to be made only for the purpose of confirming more and more strongly the truths that come on high and are contained in the sacred writings. John F. Herschel
All human joys are swift of wing, For heaven doth so allot it; That when you get an easy thing, You find you haven't got it. Eugene Field
All humans things are subject to decay.
All husbands are alike, but they have different faces so you can tell them apart. Anonymous
All in a days work for "Confuse-a-Cat"
All in all it's just another brick in the wall...
All in all just another brick in the wall.
All is mystery; but he is a slave who will not struggle to penetrate the dark veil. Benjamin Disraeli
All is well that ends well.
All laws are basically false.
All left-handed people, please raise your right hand !
All life's answers are on TV. - Bart Simpson
All life's answers are on TV., Homer Simpson
All lovely things will have an ending, All lovely things will fade and die; And youth, that's now so bravely spending, Will beg a penny by and by. Conrad Aiken
All machines are amplifiers.
All major weaknesses have been exposed, analyzed, and replaced with new weaknesses. Bruce Leverett
All mankind loves a lover. Ralph Waldo Emerson
All married women are not wives. Japanese Proverb
All maxims have their antagonist maxims; proverbs should be sold in pairs, a single one being but a half truth. William Mathews
All men are born equal. The tough job is to outgrow it.
All men are created equal. It sticks out more on some.
All men can't be masters, and neither can they be Cardassian.
All men know the utility of useful things, but not know the utility of futility
All men of action are dreamers. James G. Huneker
All men should freely use those seven words which have the power to make any marriage run smoothly: You know dear, you may be right. Anonymous
All men think all men are mortal but themselves., Edward Young
All mimsy were the borogoves...
All my good tag lines are on my other computer.
All my life, as down an abyss without a bottom, I have been pouring van-loads of information into the vacancy of oblivion I call my mind. Logan Pearsall Smith
All my troubles seem so far away.
All nature is but art unknown to thee., Alexander Pope
All objects lose by too familiar a view. John Dryden
All of the people in my building are insane. The guy above me designs synthetic hairballs for ceramic cats. The lady across the hall tried to rob a department store...with a pricing gun...She said, 'Give me all of the money in the vault, or I'm marking down everything in the store.' Stephen Wright
All of us have mortal bodies, composed of perishable matter, but the soul lives forever: it is a portion of the Deity housed in our bodies. Flavius Josephus
All of us who served in one war or another know very well that all wars are the glory and the agony of the young. Gerald R. Ford
All of us, who are worth anything, spend our manhood in unlearning the follies, or expiating the mistakes of our youth. Percy Bysshe Shelley
All other boards have no RIME or reason...
All our final decisions are made in a state of mind that is not going to last. Marcel Proust
All parties without exception, when they seek for power, are varieties of absolutism. Pierre Joseph Proudhon
All people smile in the same language.
All people walk through life, some always looking back, others always looking forward. I always look upward.| Sly
All philosophy lies in two words, sustain and abstain. Epictetus
All power corrupts, but we need electricity.
All programers are optimists.
All programmers are playwrights and all computers are lousy actors.
All programmers want arrays
All programmers want arrays.
All progress is based upon a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income. Samuel Butler
All progress is based upon a universal innate desire on the part of every organism to live beyond its income. | Samuel Butler
All progress stems from change but all change is not necessarily progress.
All reality is aspect dependent.
All religions must be tolerated, for every man must get to heaven in his own way. Frederick the Great
All requests for sick leave must be approved two weeks in advance.
All right who's been cooking hot dogs in the Warp Drive?
All right, set phasers to deep fat fry
All right, set phasers to deep fat fry!
All right, they're on our left, they're on our right, they're in front of us, they're behind us...they can't get away this time. Chesty Puller (USMC, when surrounded by 8 enemy divisions during the
All right, we'll call it a draw.
All right, who's been cooking hot dogs in the Warp Drive?
All rising to a great place is by a winding stair.
All rivers run into the sea, yet the sea is not full.
All say, 'How hard it is that we have to die'a strange complaint to come from the mouths of people who have had to live. Mark Twain
All science is either physics or stamp collecting. | E. Rutherford
All sentences that seem true should be questioned.
All software expands to take the space available.
All space routes lead to Bajor.
All stressed out, and no one to choke.
All stressed out, and no one to choke...
All sunshine makes the desert. Arab Proverb
All sysops are not user friendly.
All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother. Abraham Lincoln
All that I care to know is that a man is a human beingthat is enough for me; he can't be any worse. Mark Twain
All that glitters has a high refractive index.
All that is human must retrograde if it does not advance. Edward Gibbon
All that is valuable in human society depends upon the opportunity for development accorded the individual. Albert Einstein
All the biblical miracles will at last disappear with the progress of science. Matthew Arnold
All the easy problems have been solved.
All the things I really like to do are either illegal, immoral, or fattening. Alexander Wolcott
All the troubles you have will pass away very quickly.
All the wit in the world is not in one head.
All the world is indeed a stage... Shakespear
All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed. | Sean O'Casey
All the world's a stage and the people on it are poorly rehearsed.
All the world's a stage, And all the men and merely players. They have their exits and their entrances, And one man in his time plays many parts.... William Shakespeare
All the world's a stage, but most of us are stage hands.
All things are difficult before they are easy.
All things are green unless they are not.
All things are possible except skiing through a revolving door.
All things are possible except skiing thru a revolving door.
All things change, nothing is extinguished.
All things come to those who wait, even Latinum.
All things come to those who wait.
All things excellent are as difficult as they are rare.
All things excellent are as difficult as they are rare. Benedict Spinoza
All things is made of the same thing: nothing
All this significance - what does it mean?
All trends towards Chaos.
All true wisdom is found in taglines.
All true wisdom is found on T-shirts.
All violence, all that is dreary and repels, is not power, but the absence of power. Ralph Waldo Emerson
All wars are ironic because all wars are worse than expected.
All wish to possess knowledge, but few, comparatively speaking, are willing to pay the price. Juvenal
All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound ?
All wonder is the effect of novelty on ignorance. Samuel Johnson
All words are pegs on which to hang ideas.
All work and no play, will make you a manager.
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then Success is sure. Mark Twain
All you need is ignorance and confidence... success will follow.
All you need to be a fisherman is patience and bait.
All you'll get from strangers is surface pleasantry or indifference. Only someone who loves you will criticize you.
All your future lies beneath your hat.
All's fair in love & war and weekly profit margins.
All's well that ends well -- E. A. Poe
All's well that ends well Proverb
All's well that ends well.
All's well that ends.
Alliance, n.: In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pocket that they cannot separately plunder a third. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Allowing for seasonal adjustments, things are actually getting better.
Almost all absurdity of conduct arises from the imitation of those whom we cannot resemble. Samuel Johnson
Almost all loan officers have artificial hearts.
Almost anything is easier to get into than out of.
Almost anything is easier to get into than out of. Allen's Law
Almost every man wastes part of his life attempting to display qualities which he does not possess. Samuel Johnson
Almost everything in life is easier to get into than out of.
Almost perfect... but not quite.
Alone, adj.: In bad company. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Alone: In bad company.
Alright degenerates. I want this place empty NOW!
Alright, who's been cooking hot dogs in the warp nacelles?
Also, avoid awkward or affected alliteration.
Although gold dust is precious, when it gets in your eyes it obstructs your vision. Hsi-Tang
Although the moon is smaller than the earth, it is farther away.
Although up to its neck in hot water, the tea kettle continues to sing.
Always a tag line!
Always be nice to people on the way up; because you'll meet the same people on the way down. Wilson Mizner
Always be sincere, even if you don't mean it.
Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other one thing. Abraham Lincoln
Always behave as if nothing had happened, no matter what has happened. Arnold Bennett
Always behave like a duck - keep calm and unruffled on the surface but paddle like the devil underneath. Jacob Braude
Always borrow money from a pessimist; he doesn't expect to be paid back.
Always borrow money from a pessimist; they don't expect to be paid back. Anonymous
Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. W. C. Fields
Always cut the cards.
Always do right.  This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
Always do right.  This will gratify some people, and astonish the rest.
Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
Always do right: Gratify some and astonish the rest.
Always do right; this will gratify some people and astonish the rest. Mark Twain
Always draw your curves, then plot the data.
Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much.
Always forgive your enemies.  They *HATE* that !
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much. Oscar Wilde
Always forgive your enemiesnothing annoys them so much. Oscar Wilde
Always glad to share my ignorance - I've got plenty.
Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance King George V Welcome everything that comes to you, but do not long for anything else. Andre Gide
Always hold your head up but keep your nose at a friendly level.
Always imitate the behavior of winners when you lose. Anonymous
Always leave time in your schedule to commit one final indignity.
Always let your flattery be seen through for what really flatters a man is that you think him worth flattering. George Bernard Shaw
Always listen to experts tell you why it can't be done, then do it.
Always look on the bright side of life.
Always pick on the correct idiom.
Always prefer the probable impossible to the impossible probable.
Always proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
Always question Authority; oft venal and rong
Always remember others may hate you but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself. Richard M. Nixon
Always remember that you are unique.  Just like everyone else.
Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn!
Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn.
Always remember you're unique - just like everyone else.
Always remove the last screw first.
Always rise from the table with an appetite, and you will never sit down without one. William Penn
Always tell a woman she's beautiful, especially if she isn't.
Always the dullness of the fool is the whetstone of the wits.
Always try to do things in chronological order; it's less confusing that way. Anonymous
Always try to exhort others to look upon you favorably.
Always use tasteful words.  You may have to eat them.
Always vote for principle, though you may vote alone, and you may cherish the sweetest reflection that your vote is never lost. John Quincy Adams
Always willing to share my ignorance...
Alzheimers advantage: New friends every day.
Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them? Abraham Lincoln
Am I wise, or otherwise ?
Am I wise, or otherwise? <grin>
Amateur Time Lord
Amazing "Bob" Pil Can Make You Insane!
Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound
Ambidextrous, adj.: Able to pick with equal skill a right-hand pocket or a left. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Ambiguity is the preserve of the nimble minded, yet frozen lipped.
Ambition destroys its possessor.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. | Charlie McCarthy
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having the good sense to be lazy.
Ambition is the last refuge of the failure.
Ambition is the last refuge of the failure. Oscar Wilde
America ... a great social and economic experiment, noble in motive and far-reaching in purpose. Herbert Hoover
America has believed that in differentiation, not in uniformity, lies the path of progress. It acted on this belief; it has advanced human happiness, and it has prospered. Louis D. Brandeis
America has meant to the world a land in which the common man who means well and is willing to do his part has access to all the necessary means of a good life. Alvin Saunders Johnson
America is a country of young men. Ralph Waldo Emerson
America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair. Arnold Joseph Toynbee
America is not fighting to win a war. We are fighting to give an application to an old Greek proverb, which is that the purpose of war is not to annihilate an enemy but to get him to mend his ways. And we are confident we can get the enemy to mend his. Arthur J. Goldberg
America is not merely a nation but a nation of nations. Lyndon Baines Johnson
America is the country where you buy a lifetime supply of aspirin for one dollar and use it up in two weeks. John Barrymore
America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone directly from barbarism to degeneration without the usual interval of civilization. Georges Clemenceau
America lives in the heart of every man everywhere who wishes to find a region where he will be free to work out his destiny as he chooses. Woodrow Wilson
America may be unique in being a country which has leapt from barbarism to decadence without touching civilization. | John O'Hara
America the land of the Chrysler 440 cubic inch engine
America was discovered by Amerigo Vespucci and was named after him, until people got tired of living in a place called "Vespuccia" and changed its name to "America". | Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"
America was not discovered by Americans, shame on them.
America! the land of the Chrysler 440 cubic inch engine!
America's best buy for a nickel is a telephone call to the right man.
America, thou half-brother of the world; With something good and bad of every land. Philip James Bailey
America.... It is a fabulous country, the only fabulous country; it is the only place where miracles not only happen, but where they happen all the time. Thomas Wolfe
America:  log on or log off
American diplomacy is easy on the brain but hell on the feet. Charles G. Dawes
American is a very difficult language mixed with English. Anonymous
Americans never quit. Douglas MacArthur
Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic. Dan Rather
Amiga multitasking - Can act as a paper weight AND a door stop.
Amityville - A good Place To Be From - Far From!
Amnesia used to be my favorite word, but then I forgot it.
Among economists, the real world is often a special case.|
Among free men there can be no successful appeal from the ballot to the bullet. Abraham Lincoln
Among mortals second thoughts are wisest. Euripides
Among the lucky, you are the chosen one.
Among these treasures of our land is waterfast becoming our most valuable, most prized, most critical resource. A blessing where properly usedbut it can bring devastation and ruin when left uncontrolled. Dwight D. Eisenhower
Amusement is the happiness of those who cannot think.
An American seeker: 'If you follow any way, you will never get there; and if you do not follow any way, you will never get there. So one faces a dilemma.' Hisamatsu: 'Let that dilemma be your way.' Contemporary Mondo
An American's a person who isn't afraid to criticize the President but is always polite to traffic cops.
An Electrician gets into people's shorts!
An Elephant Is Just A Mouse Built To Gov't Specs !
An Elephant;  A Mouse built to government specifications.
An Englishman never enjoys himself, except for a noble purpose. | A. P. Herbert
An abstract term is like a valise with a false bottom, you may put in it what ideas you please, and take them out again, without being observed.
An accommodating vice is better than an obstinate virtue.
An accordian: A bagpipe with pleats.
An actor entering through the door, you've got nothing. But if he enters through the window, you've got a situation. Billy Wilder, american director
An agreeable person: One who agrees with you.
An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do. - Dylan Thomas
An ancient buddha said, 'Mountains are mountains; waters are waters.' These words do not mean mountains are mountains; they mean mountains are mountains. Dogen
An angel's arm can't snatch me from the grave; legions of angels can't confine me there. Edward Young
An appeal is when you ask one court to show it's contempt for another court. Finley Peter Dunne
An appeal to the reason of the people has never been known to fail in the long run. James Russell Lowell
An appeaser feeds a crocodile, hoping to be eaten last.
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last. Sir Winston Churchill
An apple a day keeps the doctor away Proverb
An apple a day keeps the doctor away...  if it is aimed well.
An apple never falls far from the tree Proverb
An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her. Agatha Christie
An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have: the older she gets, the more interested he is in her. Agatha Christie
An armed society is a polite society. Anonymous
An army of sheep led by a lion would defeat an army of lions led by a sheep. Arab Proverb
An artist cannot speak about art, any more than a plant can discuss horticulture.| Jean Cocteau
An artist should be fit for the best society and kept out of it.
An ass is but an ass, though laden with gold. Romanian Proverb
An ass thinks one thing, his rider another.
An atheist has no invisible means of support.
An atheist is a guy who watches a Notre Dame-SMU football game and doesn't care who wins. Dwight D. Eisenhower
An atheist is a man with no invisible means of support.
An athiest is a man with no invisible means of support. John Buchan
An atom blaster is a good weapon, but it can point both ways.
An authority knows lots of things you don't care about.
An autobiography is the story of how a man thinks he lived. Herbert Samuel
An easily understood, workable falsehood is more useful than a complex, incomprehensible truth.
An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible. Alfred A. Knopf
An education isn't how much you have committed to memory, or even how much you know. It's being able to differentiate between what you do know and what you don't. Anatole France
An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.
An egotist thinks he's in the groove when he's in a rut.
An election is coming. Universal peace is declared and the foxes have a sincere interest in prolonging the lives of the poultry. T.S. Eliot
An electrician worries about current events
An elephant is a mouse built to government specifications.
An elephant is a mouse with an operating system.
An empty stomach is not a good political advisor. Albert Einstein
An enemy is anyone who tells the truth about you. Elbert Hubbard
An engineer is someone who does list processing in fortran.
An epitaph is a belated advertisement for a line of goods that have been permanently discontinued. Irvin S. Cobb
An error doesn't become a mistake until you refuse to correct it. Orlando A. Battista
An expert has a great reason for guessing wrong.
An expert is a person who avoids the small errors while sweeping on to the grand fallacy. Anonymous
An expert is someone from out of town.
An extravagance is anything you buy that is of no earthly use to your wife. Franklin P. Jones
An eye can threaten like a loaded and levelled gun, or it can insult like hissing or kicking; or, in its altered mood, by beams of kindness, it can make the heart dance for joy. Ralph Waldo Emerson
An honest God is the noblest work of man.
An honest God is the noblest work of man. Robert Green Ingersoll
An honest man nearly always thinks justly. Jean Jacques Rousseau
An honest man's the noblest work of God. Alexander Pope
An honest tale speeds best being plainly told.
An idea is not responsible for the people who believe in it.
An idea that is not dangerous is unworthy of being called an idea at all. Elbert Hubbard
An ideal wife is one who remains faithful to you but tries to be just as charming as if she weren't. Sacha Guitry
An idealist believes the short run doesn't count. A cynic believes the long run doesn't matter. A realist believes that what is done or left undone in the short run determines the long run. Sidney J. Harris
An idealist is one who, on noticing that a rose smells better than a cabbage, concludes that it is also more nourishing. H. L. Mencken
An idle brain is the devil's workshop. English Proverb
An idle mind is worth two in the bush.
An improper mind is a perpetual feast.
An inability to stay quiet is one of the conspicuous failings of mankind. Walter Bagehot
An inch of dog is better than a mile of pedigree.
An incompetent attorney can delay a trial for months or years. A competent attourney can delay one even longer. Evelle J. Younger
An infinite universe is at each moment opened to our view. And this universe is the sign and symbol of Infinite Power, Intelligence, Purity, Bliss, and Love. William Ellery Channing
An institution is the lengthened shadow of one man. Ralph Waldo Emerson
An intellectual is a man who takes more words than necessary to tell more than he knows. Dwight D. Eisenhower
An investment in knowledge pays the best interest. Benjamin Franklin
An object at rest will be in the wrong place.
An object at rest will be in the wrong place. Gerrold's Second Law of Infernal Dynamics
An object in motion will be heading in the wrong direction.
An object in motion will be heading in the wrong direction. Gerrold's First Law of Infernal Dynamics
An object of information most needed will be least available.
An object will fall so as to do the most damage.
An object will fall so as to do the most damage. Selective Gravity Law
An open mind doesn't always require an open mouth
An open mind, like an open window, should be screened to keep the bugs out. Virginia Hutchinson
An oppressed people are authorized whenever they can to rise and break their fetters. Henry Clay
An optimist believes this to be the best of all possible worlds.  A pessimist fears this to be true.
An optimist is a guy without much experience.
An optimist is a man who has never had much experience. Don Marquis
An optimist is a person without much experience.
An optimist laughs to forget..A pessimist forgets to laugh.
An ostentatious man will rather relate a blunder or an absurdity he has committed, than be debarred from talking of his own dear person. Joseph Addison
An ounce of application is worth a ton of abstraction.
An ounce of emotion is equal to a ton of facts.
An ounce of image is worth a pound of performance.
An ounce of pretention's worth a pound of manure...
An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure Proverb
An oyster is a fish built like a nut.
An ugly baby is a very nasty object, and the prettiest is frightful when undressed. Queen Victoria
An ulcer is what you get mountain climbing over molehills
An unbreakable toy can be used to break other toys.
An unbreakable toy is excellent for breaking other toys.
An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys. Van Roy's Law
An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.|
An unemployed court jester is no one's fool.
An unfortunate thing about this world is that the good habits are much easier to give up than the bad ones. W. Somerset Maugham, author
Anal retentive people don't give a crap.
Anarchists of the world -- UNITE !
Anarchy is against the law.
Anarchy may not be the best form of government, but it's better than no government at all.
Anarchy may not be the best form of government, but it's better than no government at all. Anonymous
Anarchy means ignoring things that really piss you off!
Anatomically Correct beats Policically Correct ANY DAY
Anchovies?  You've got the wrong man  I spell my name DANGER  (click)
Anchovies?  You've got the wrong man!  I spell my name DANGER!  (click)
Ancient Ferengi Love Saying:  Wenum can'tum waitum
Ancient Greeks made dolphin-killing punishable by death.
Ancient custom has the force of law. Legal Maxim
And Adam asked "What's a Headache?"
And Adam asked, "What's a headache?"
And God said, "I'll buy a vowel."
And God said: E = +mv} - Ze}/r, and there was light.
And God said: E = mv - Ze/r, and there was light.
And I alone am returned to wag the tail.
And I thought *I* had problems
And all the children are above average in our system.
And behind every man who's a failure there's a woman, too! John Ruge
And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
And gain is gain, however small. Robert Browning
And he disappeared in a puff of logic.
And here's another clue for you all:  The walrus was Paul.
And how can this be?  For he IS the Kumquat Haagen
And if I come again I will receive you unto myself!
And if Iraqs primary export was broccoli?
And if you believe that one, I have a cheap IBM mini to sell you| The sales man
And maybe we'll do in a squirrel or two.
And now a word from our sponsor...
And now for something completely different.
And now for something completely different. A man with 3 buttocks.
And now for something completely different...
And now for something completely else...
And now for something completely the same...
And now for something ruder...
And now, a word from our sponsor...
And now... The Larch.
And oft, my jealousy shapes faults that are not. William Shakespeare
And on the seventh day He took an aspirin.
And on the seventh day, He exited from append mode.
And remember.  NO ANCHOVIES, PLEASE!!!
And shun the frumious Bandersnatch
And so with vorpal sword in hand
And that is what I think... nyeh nyeh nyeh!
And that's inches babe, not centimetres.| Johnny Holmes
And the Dollar is holding steady at 100 cents.
And the Lord said 'Maxwells Equations'. And there was light.
And the days dwindle down to a precious few...
And the men who hold high places...
And the people bowed and prayed, to the neon Gods they'd made.| Paul Simon
And then Adam said, "What's a headache?"
And then it goes... BOOOOOMMMM!!!
And there he was, reigning supreme at number two.
And there's hamburger all over the highway in Mystic, Connecticut.
And they're off
And they're off!
And this is what you do for fun.
And this, Wesley, is an airlock.
And to preserve their independence, we must not let our rulers load us with perpetual debt. We must make our election between economy and liberty, or profusion and servitude. Thomas Jefferson
And tomorrow will be like today, only more so.
And when I get real, real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. Stephen Wright
And when we think we lead, we are most led. Lord Byron
And who are the greater criminalsthose who sell the instruments of death, or those who buy them and use them? Robert Emmet Sherwood
And who knows? Somewhere out there in this audience may even be someone who will one day follow my footsteps, and preside over the White House as the president's spouse. I wish him well! Barbara Bush, commencement address to Wellesley College
And you thought CHAOS ment rush-hour traffic
And, the driver compresses EVERYTHING, not just EXE & COM
Angels can fly because they take themselves so lightly.
Angels we have heard on High Tell us to go out and Buy. | Tom Leher
Anger and haste hinder good counsel.
Anger blows out the lamp of the mind.
Anger blows out the lamp of the mind. Robert Ingersoll
Anger is a wind which blows out the lamp of the mind.
Anger is never without a reason but seldom a good one. Benjamin Franklin
Anger is never without reason, but seldom with a good one.
Anger is not the same as frustration, But Anger is caused by it.
Angling: The name given to fishing by non-fishermen.
Animal Testing = Animal Suffering..
Animals are reliable, many full of love, true in their affections, predictable in their actions, grateful and loyal. Difficult standards for people to live up to. Alfred A. Montapert
Animals are such agreeable friends, they ask no questions, they pass no criticisms. George Eliot
Ankh if you love Isis.
Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Another bit of knowledge from the Hollywood Typographer
Another day, another shaving accident.
Another fine product from Bastards Inc.
Another font of knowledge from the Typographer.
Another good night not to sleep in a eucalyptus tree.
Another nearly-full box of Smarties
Another of our highly prized virtues is fidelity. We are immensely pleased with ourselves when we are faithful. Ida Ross Wylie
Another proud wearer of white walk socks.
Another smooth escape disguised as a dramatic exit.
Another such victory over the Romans, and we are undone.
Answers : $1, Correct answers : $5, Dumb Looks : FREE !
Answers: $1, Short: $5, Correct: $25, dumb looks are still free.
Answers: $1.  Correct answers: $5.  Dumb looks: Free
Antelope - Someone who is against all lopes.
Antelope freeway--1/4 mile.
Antenna coupling: insect foreplay.
Anthony's Law of Force: Don't force it; get a larger hammer.
Anthony's Law of the Workshop: 	Any tool when dropped, will roll into the least accessible corner of the workshop.
Anti-Mickeys of the world : Unite !
Antidisestablishmentarianism!
Antoine de Saint-Exupery Our lives are like a candle in the wind. Carl Sandburg
Antonym, n.: The opposite of the word you're trying to think of.
Ants are so much like human beings as to be an embarrasment...They do everything but watch television. Lewis Thomas
Any I.C. protected by a fast acting fuse will protect the fuse by blowing first.
Any IC protected by a fast acting fuse will protect the fuse by blowing first.
Any authentic work of art must start an argument between the artist and his audience. Dame Rebecca West
Any body seen my tagline...?
Any clod can have the facts, but having opinions is an art.
Any clod can have the facts, but having opinions is an art. | Charles McCabe
Any closet is a walk-in closet if you try hard enough.
Any excuse will serve a tyrant.
Any excuse will serve a tyrant. | Aesop
Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude toward it, for that determines our success or failure. Norman Vincent Peale
Any fool can criticize, condemn, & complain. And most do.
Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain, and most fools do. Benjamin Franklin
Any fool can make a rule, and every fool will mind it. Henry David Thoreau
Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise man to be able to sell it.
Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise person to be able to sell it.
Any fool can tell the truth, but it requires a man of some sense to know how to lie well. Samuel Butler
Any fool can tell the truth, it takes sense to lie well.
Any given program costs more and takes longer.
Any given program costs more and takes longer. Laws of Computer Programming, II
Any given program will expand to fill all available memory.
Any given program, when running, is obsolete.
Any given program, when running, is obsolete. Laws of Computer Programming, I
Any idiot can find something wrong with anything!  THAT'S WHAT MAKES THEM IDIOTS!!!
Any job worth doing is worth complaining about.
Any landing you can walk away from is a good one.
Any law that takes hold of a man's daily life cannot prevail in a community, unless the vast majority of the community are actively in favor of it. The laws that are the most operative are the laws which protect life. Henry Ward Beecher
Any man more right than his neighbors, constitutes a majority of one. Henry David Thoreau
Any man who has had the job I've had and didn't have a sense of humor wouldn't still be here. Harry S Truman
Any man who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad.
Any member introducing a dog into the Society's premises shall be liable to a fine of one pound. Any animal leading a blind person shall be deemed to be a cat. | Rule 46, Oxford Union Society, London
Any non-trivial program contains at least one bug. Laws of Computer Programming, VIII
Any order that can be misunderstood, has been misunderstood.
Any party which takes credit for the rain must not be surprised if its opponents blame it for the drought. Dwight W. Morrow
Any people anywhere being inclined and having the power have the right to rise up and shake off the existing government, and force a new one that suits them better. Abraham Lincoln
Any person, when confronted by enough stress, will sooner or later turn out a product which is utterly beyond their ability.
Any phenomenon, once observed and noted, will cease to exist.  In theory, a particularly astute observer could destroy everything as we know it...
Any philosophy that can be put in a nutshell belongs there
Any product cut to length will be too short.
Any product cut to length will be too short. Klipstein's Observation The trouble with resisting temptation is it may never come your way again. Korman's Law
Any program will expand to fill available memory. Laws of Computer Programming, V
Any shrine is better than self-worship.
Any simple idea will be worded in the most complicated way.
Any small object that is accidentally dropped will hide under a larger object.
Any sufficiently advanced bug will become a feature.
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a rigged demo.
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. Clarke's Third Law
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.| A. C. Clarke
Any system that depends on reliability is unreliable.
Any technology distinguishable from magic is insufficiently advanced. Anonymous
Any tool when dropped, will roll into the least accessible corner of the workshop. Anthony's Law of the Workshop
Any two philosophers can tell each other all they know in two hours. | Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
Any wire cut to length will be too short.
Any wire cut to specified length will be too short.
Any woman is a volume if one knows how to read her.
Anybody can be born right-handed. Only the best of us overcome it.
Anybody can win unless there happens to be a second entry. George Ade
Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.
Anybody can win, unless there is a second entry.
Anybody who doesn't cut his speed at the sight of a police car is probably parked.
Anybody who is 25 or 30 years old has physical scars from all sorts of things, from tuberculosis to polio. It's the same with the mind. Moses R. Kaufman
Anybody with money to burn will easily find someone to tend the fire.
Anyone can count the seeds in an apple. Anonymous
Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.
Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm. Publius Syrus
Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm. | Publilius Syrus
Anyone can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.
Anyone could do it with manuals.
Anyone entrusted with power will abuse it if not also animated with the love of truth and virtue, no matter whether he be a prince, or one of the people. Jean de la Fontaine
Anyone want a burger? It has cheese on both sides
Anyone want a burger? It has cheese on both sides!
Anyone who can cope with mathematics is not fully human.
Anyone who cannot cope with mathematics is not fully human.  At best he is a tolerable subhuman who has learned to wear shoes, bathe and not make messes in the house. | Lazarus Long, "Time Enough for Love"
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined. | Samuel Goldwyn
Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined., Samuel Goldwyn
Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new. Albert Einstein
Anyone who hates Dogs and Kids Can't be All Bad. | W. C. Fields
Anyone who hates children and dogs can't be all bad.
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. | Douglas Adams, "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"
Anyone who remembers the 60's... wasn't there.
Anyone who says you can't see a thought simply dosen't know art. Wynetka Ann Reynolds
Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young. Henry Ford
Anything can be made to work if you fiddle with it long enough.
Anything can be made to work if you fiddle with it long enough. Wyszkowski's Second Law
Anything done while honking your horn is legal. | Rules for driving in New York
Anything dropped in the bathroom falls in the toilet.
Anything free is worth what you pay for it.
Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.|
Anything is good and useful if it's made of chocolate.
Anything is good if it is made from chocolate.
Anything is impossible, if you don't attempt it.
Anything is possible, unless it's not.
Anything labeled "NEW" and/or "IMPROVED" isn't.  The label means the price went up.  The label "ALL NEW", "COMPLETELY NEW", or "GREAT NEW" means the price went way up.
Anything not nailed down is a cat toy.
Anything not nailed down is a cat toy...
Anything not worth doing is not worth doing well. -- G. Bell.
Anything that begins well, ends badly. Anything that begins badly, ends worse.
Anything that can go wr ... # ^% Bus Error | Core
Anything that can go wr... # ^% Bus Error -- Core Dumped
Anything that can go wrong will.
Anything we learn today may be disproven tomorrow.
Anything worth doing is worth overdoing
Anything worth doing is worth overdoing.
Anytime things appear to be going better, you have overlooked something.
Apathists of the world ..... ahh, forget it!
Apathy Error : Don't bother striking any key.
Apathy Error: Don't bother striking any key.
Apathy is a sort of living oblivion. Horace Greeley
Apology is only egotism wrong side out.
Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today. Mark Twain
Appearances can be deceiving Proverb
Appearances often are deceiving.
Applaud friends, the comedy is over. Ludwig van Beethoven, last words
Applause waits on success. Benjamin Franklin
Apple (c) Copyright 1767, Sir Isaac Newton.
Apple Computer don't threaten us, we can buy them out of petty cash.| John Akers, IBM
Applied emotion is the key to success with happiness.
Applying computer technology is simply finding the right wrench to pound in the correct screw. Anonymous
Appreciate me now -- and avoid the rush.
April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four.
April showers bring May flowers Proverb
Aquadextrous, adj.: Possessing the ability to turn the bathtub faucet on and off with your toes. | Rich Hall, "Sniglets"
Arabs wear turbines on their heads
Archaeologists take sedimental journeys.
Archaeologists will date any old thing.
Archimedes had no principles
Architecture is the art of how to waste space.
Are CD's really the Pits?
Are Cheerios really donut seeds?
Are Girl Scout Cookies made from real Girl Scouts?
Are RAM chips better than EWE chips?
Are You Abnormal?  THEN YOU ARE PROBABLY *BETTER* THAN MOST PEOPLE!
Are dog biscuits made from collie flour?
Are part-time band leaders semi-conductors?
Are the noises in my head bothering you?
Are they made from real Girl Scouts?
Are those cookies made with real Girl Scouts?
Are thunder thighs produced by "eat" lighting?
Are we having fun yet ?
Are we near a slaughterhouse, or did you forget your deodorant?
Are we not men?
Are we supposed to be having fun yet?
Are you a Klingon, or is that a turtle on your head ?
Are you a Klingon, or is that a turtle on your head.
Are you a turtle?
Are you afraid of the night?
Are you after MY pervert award or what ???
Are you bored with life? Then throw yourself into some work you believe in with all your heart, live for it, die for it, and you will find happiness that you had thought could never be yours. Dale Carnegie
Are you out of my mind?
Are you prepared to defend yourself?
Are you suggesting coconuts are migratory?
Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate ?
Are you sure (N/n) ?
Are you sure (Y/y) ?
Are you talking to me  ()...?
Are you waiting for your prey?
Aren't spill chukkers grate.
Aren't you glad that everything is going so smoothly?
Argh, 4 AM already !
Argument is the worst sort of conversation. Jonathan Swift
Arguments are to be avoided; they are always vulgar and often convincing.
Aristotle was all wet!
Arithmetic is being able to count up to twenty without taking off your shoes. | Mickey Mouse
Armadillo: To provide weapons to a Spanish Pickle.
Armadillo: To provide weapons to a Spanish pickle
Army food: the spoils of war.
Arnold Schwarzenegger Virus: Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.
Arnold's Laws of Documentation: (1) If it should exist, it doesn't. (2) If it does exist, it's out of date. (3) Only documentation for useless programs transcends the first two laws.
Arouse the mind without resting it on anything. Diamond Sutra
Arrogance is the obstruction of wisdom.
Art arises when the secret vision of the artist and the manefestation of nature agree to find new shapes. Kahlil Gibran
Art does not reproduce the visible; it makes visible.
Art for art's sake is a philosophy of the well-fed.
Art is I; Science is We.
Art is a lie that makes us realize the truth.
Art is anything you can get away with. -- Marshall McLuhan.
Art is either plagiarism or revolution.
Art is vision not expression.
Art is your fate; don't debate.
Art, like morality, consists of drawing the line somewhere.
Arthur's Laws of Love: (1) People to whom you are attracted invariably think you remind them of someone else. (2) The love letter you finally got the courage to send will be delayed in the mail long enough for you to make a fool of yourself in person.
Artificial Intelligence is no match for natural stupidity
Artificial Intelligence is the study of how to make real computers act like the ones in movies. Anonymous
Artificial Intelligence: The other guy's opinion.
Artificial intelligence. Natural stupidity.
Artistic ventures highlighted.  Rob a museum.
As A general rule, people marry most hapily with their own kind. The trouble lies in the fact that people usually marry at an age where they do not really know what their own kind is. Robertson Davies
As I said before, I never repeat myself.
As I would not be a slave, so I would not be a master. This expresses my idea of democracy. Abraham Lincoln
As Will Rogers would have said, "There is no such things as a free variable."
As Zeus said to Narcissus, "Watch yourself."
As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.
As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. Ralph Waldo Emerson
As a general rule, the freedom of any people can be judged by the volume of their laughter. Anonymous
As a man is said to have a right to his property, he may be equally said to have a property in his rights. James Madison
As a matter of fact, no, I don't have a life.
As a rule, there is no surer way to the dislike of men than to behave well where they have behaved badly. Lew Wallace
As blushing will sometimes make a whore pass for a virtuous woman, so modesty may make a fool seem a man of sense. Jonathan Swift
As confused as a termite in a yo-yo
As easy as 3.1415926535897932384626433832795028841
As easy as 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716
As far as the laws of mathematics refer to reality, they are not certain; and as far as they are certain, they do not refer to reality. | Albert Einstein
As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error.
As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error. | Weisert
As for me, all I know is that I know nothing.
As goatherd learns his trade by goat, so writer learns his trade by wrote.
As if we don't have enough volence on television. Barbara Bush, first lady, after her husband accidentally hit two spectators with golfballs during a celebrity golf tournament. 1995
As if you could kill time without injuring eternity. Henry David Thoreau
As knowledge increases, wonder deepens. Charles Morgan
As lacking in privacy as a goldfish.
As long as I can conceive something better than myself I cannot be easy unless I am striving to bring it into existence or clearing the way for it. George Bernard Shaw
As long as I can remember, I've had amnesia.
As long as I don't write about the government, religion, politics, and other institutions, I am free to print anything. Beaumarchais
As long as I live, I shall be, myself, no other, just me.
As long as our social order regards the good of institutions rather than the good of men, so long will there be a vocation for the rebel. Richard Roberts
As long as people believe in absurdities they will continue to commit atrocities. Voltaire
As long as the answer is right, who cares if the question is wrong?
As long as the world shall last there will be wrongs, and if no man objected and no man rebelled, those wrongs would last forever. Clarence Darrow
As long as war is regarded as wicked, it will always have its fascination.  When it is looked upon as vulgar, it will cease to be popular. | Oscar Wilde
As long as we are lucky we attribute it to our smartness; our bad luck we give the gods credit for. Josh Billings
As long as you keep a person down, some part of you has to be down there to hold him down, so it means you cannot soar as you otherwise might. Marian Anderson
As machines get to be more and more like men, men will come to be more like machines. Joseph Wood Krutch
As nuclear and other technological achievements continue to mount, the normal life span will continue to climb. The hourly productivity of the worker will increase. Dwight D. Eisenhower
As of 1992, they're called European Economic Community fries. Anonymous
As of next week, passwords will be entered in Morse code.
As one grows older, one becomes wiser and more foolish. Franois de la Rochefoucauld
As scarce as the truth is, the supply is much greater than the demand.
As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of demand.
As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand. Josh Billings
As society advances the standard of poverty rises. Theodore Parker
As soils are depleted, human health, vitality and intelligence go with them. Louis Bromfield
As soon as there is life there is danger. Ralph Waldo Emerson
As the Sandwich-Islander believes that the strength and valor of the enemy he kills passes into himself, so we gain the strength of the temptations we resist. Ralph Waldo Emerson
As the arteries grow hard, the heart grows soft. H. L. Mencken
As the axe entered the forest, the trees said, "The handle is one of us."
As the gardiner so is the garden.
As the grace grows nearer my theology is growing strangely simple, and it begins and ends with Christ as the only Savior of the lost. Henry Benjamin Whipple
As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" -- probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. | Woody Allen
As the trials of life continue to take their toll, remember that there is always a future in Computer Maintenance. | National Lampoon, "Deteriorada"
As threshing separates the wheat from the chaff, so does affliction purify virtue. Richard E. Burton
As well look for a needle in a bottle of hay.
As you get older, the pickings get slimmer, but the people don't. Carrie Fisher
As you journey through life take a minute every now and then to give a thought for the other fellow. He could be plotting something., Hagar the Horrible
As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round. Ben Hogan
As your Doctor I advise you to drink heavily.
Ask Not for whom the Bell Tolls, and You will Pay only the Station-to-Station rate.
Ask a lot, but take what is offered. Russian Proverb
Ask about your neighbors, then buy the house. Jewish Proverb
Ask me about my vow of silence.
Ask not for whom the bell tolls ; let the machine get it
Ask not for whom the telephone bell tolls ... if thou art in the bathtub, it tolls for thee.
Ask not what your country can do for you: Ask what you can do for your country. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
Ask others for help and be in debt forever.
Ask your boss to reconsider -- it's so difficult to take "Go to hell" for an answer.
Asking an incumbent member of Congress to vote for term limits is a bit like asking a chicken to vote for Colonel Sanders. Bob Inglis, 1995
Asking dumb questions is easier than correcting dumb mistakes.
Asking if computers can think is like asking if submarines can swim.
Asphault = Proctologist's malpractice insurance
Ass, n.: The masculine of "lass".
Assassination is the extreme form of censorship.
Assassins Do It Secretively, and Finally.
Associate reverently, as much as you can, with your loftiest thoughts. Henry David Thoreau
Associate with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation; for it is better to be alone than in bad company. George Washington
Associate with men of good quality, if you esteem your own reputation; it is better to be alone than in bad company. George Washington
Associate yourself with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation, for 'tis better to be alone than in bad company. George Washington
Assume the worst, you'll never be disappointed.
Assumed Decimal Point: Located two positions to the right of a programmer's current salary in estimating his own worth.
Assumption #1: Dan Quayle is smarter than broccoli.
Assumption is the mother of all screw-ups. Wethern's Law
Assumption is the mother of all screwups.
Assumption is the mother of all screwups...
Assumptions are the termites of relationships. I wrote that. Henry Winkler, actor, Emerson College Graduation, 1995
Astronauts are out to launch.
Astronauts get missile-toe.
At 19, everything is possible; tomorrow looks friendly.
At 20 years of age the will reigns; at 30 the wit; at 40 the judgment. Benjamin Franklin
At Group L, Stoffel oversees six first-rate programmers, a managerial challenge roughly comparable to herding cats. | The Washington Post Magazine, June 9, 1985
At a recent meeting in Snowmass, Colorado, a participant from Los Angeles fainted from hyperoxygenation, and we had to hold his head under the exhaust of a bus until he revived.
At all ages you are certain you still have another year.
At least she's the president of something, which is more than I can say. Bob Dole, US Senate Majority Leader, on his wife Elizabeth, president of the American Red Cross, 1995
At my graduation, I thought we had to marry what we wished to become. Now you are becoming the men you once would have wished to marry. Gloria Steinem, author and activist, Smith College Graduation, 1995
At some glad moment was it nature's choice To dower a scrap of sunset with a voice? Edgar Fawcett
At the end of the day, it's balls in the back of the net that counts.
At the end of the game, the king and the pawn go into the same bag.
At the heart of racism is the religious assertion that God made a creative mistake when He brought some people into being. Friedrich Otto Hertz
At the source of every error which is blamed on the computer you will find at least two human errors, including the error of blaming it on the computer.
At the tone, leave a message to Q & he will harass you when he has time.
At what point in the dairy process is the Milk Dud made
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
Atheist = Deity Disadvantaged.
Atheistic dyslexics don't believe in dog.
Atlee is a very modest man.  And with reason. | Winston Churchill
Auntie Em.  Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog.|Dorothy.
Auntie Em: Hate you, hate Kansas. Took the dog... Dorothy
Auntie Em: Hate you,hate Kansas, aking the dog.- Dorothy
Aural sex produces eargasms.
Auribus teneo lupum.  (I hold a wolf by the ears.)
Author of "Lead, follow, or get outta the way."
Author of "Zilch."
Authority tends to assign jobs to those least able to do them.
Autistics commit senseless violence.  Film at 11.
Autobiography: Unrivalled telling truth about others.
Autocracy is based on the theorem that one man is smarter than many.
Automobile, n.: A four-wheeled vehicle that runs up hills and down pedestrians.
Automobile: A four-wheeled vehicle that runs up hills and down pedestrians.
Avatar terminal, the long distance co.'s nightmare
Avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. Romans 12:19
Avenge the death of the working class!
Avert misunderstanding by calm, poise, and balance.
Avoid Computer virus -- practice safe HEX !
Avoid GOTOs completely if you can keep the program readable.
Avoid Quiet and Placid persons unless you are in Need of Sleep. | National Lampoon, "Deteriorada"
Avoid colloquial stuff.
Avoid commas, that are not necessary.
Avoid contradicting in general, especially people you love. Maurice Baring
Avoid criticism - say, do and be nothing.
Avoid flatterers, for they are thieves in disguise. William Penn
Avoid messes.. Remember to cover cat before microwaving.
Avoid overly pretentious job titles such as "Lord of the Realm, Defender of the Faith, Emperor of India" or "Director of Corporate Planning." | The Official MBA Handbook on business cards
Avoid popularity if you would have peace. Abraham Lincoln
Avoid popularity; it has many snares, and no real benefit. William Penn
Avoid reality at all costs.
Avoid reality at all costs.
Avoid run-on sentences they are hard to read.
Avoid temporary variables and strange women.
Avoid temporary variables.
Avoid the 5 o'clock rush - always leave work at noon.
Avoid the Fortran arithmetic IF.
Avoid the evil, and it will avoid thee. Gaelic Proverb
Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.
Avoid unnecessary branches.
Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold. Helen Keller
Awards are like hemorrhoids; in the end, every asshole gets one. - Frederick Raphael
Awwww its just a Harmless little Bunny
BABY ON BOARD -just means five more points
BAD command or filename...Go stand in that corner!
BAKER'S LAW: You never want the one you can afford.
BAR 1.  The second metasyntactic variable after FOO (q.v.) "Suppose we have two functions, FOO and BAR. FOO calls BAR..."
BAR 2.  Often appended to FOO to produce FOOBAR.
BARACH'S RULE: An alcoholic is a person who drinks more than his own physician.
BASIC is to computer programming as "qwerty" is to typing.
BASIC isn't; C stands for Confusing...
BBS 'till you drop - carrier
BBS addiction is a terminal disease.
BBS: a method to triple your phone bill.
BBSing : Files, Folks and Fun !
BCPL -> B -> C !!! No wonder C is so cryptic !
BE ALERT  (The world needs more lerts ...)
BEDFELLOWS RULE: The one who snores will fall asleep first.
BEER...  Drink your daily B-complex with a foamy head.
BENEDICT'S PRINCIPLE (formerly MURPHY'S NINTH COROLLARY): Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
BERYL'S LAW: The "CONSUMER REPORT" on the item will come out a week after you buy the item.
BETA testing is hazardous to your health.
BIRTH: The first and dirtiest of all disasters. Ambrose Bierce
BLISS is ignorance.
BOCKLAGE'S LAW: He who laughs last probably didn't get the joke.
BOING! ASCII stupid question; get a stupid ANSI.
BOOB'S LAW: (from MURPHY'S LAW): You always find something the last place you look.
BOUNDARY, n. In political geography, an imaginary line between two nations, separating the imaginary rights of one from the imaginary rights of another. Ambrose Bierce
BOY, n.: a noise with dirt on it. Not Your Average Dictionary
BRAIN.COM file closed. (A)rgue (R)etry (F)orget It
BREAKFAST.COM Halted... Cereal Port Not Responding.
BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding.
BREDA'S RULE: At any event, the people whose seats are farthest from the aisle arrive last.
BRINTNALL'S LAW: If you are given two contradictory orders, obey them both.
BROKEN adj. 1. Not working properly (of programs). 2. Behaving strangely; especially (of people), exhibiting extreme depression.
BS (bee ess): n. An uninformed statement.
BTW, FWIW, IMHO, yes. OTOH, AAMOF, maybe not.
BTW: Between The Words
BUFFERS=7 FILES=5, 2nd Down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go
BUG [from telephone terminology, "bugs in a telephone cable", blamed for noisy lines.] n. An unwanted and unintended (and undesirable) property of a program. See FEATURE.
BUG, n.: An aspect of a computer program which exists because the programmer was thinking about Jumbo Jacks or stock options when s/he wrote the program. Not Your Average Dictionary
BUGS, pl. n.: Small living things that small living boys throw on small living girls. Anonymous
BUREAUCRAT, n.: A person who cuts red tape sideways. J. McCabe
BUREAUCRAT, n.: A politician who has tenure. Anonymous
BUZZ v. To run in a very tight loop, perhaps without guarantee of getting out.
BYRNE'S LAW OF CONCRETING: When you pour, it rains.
BYTE ME -- BYTE ME -- BYTE ME -- BYTE ME
Babies are such a nice way to start people. Don Herold
Babies haven't any hair; Old men's heads are just as bare; Between the cradle and the grave Lies a haircut and a shave Samuel Hoffenstein
Baby Philosophy - If it stinks, change it.
Baby on board !
Baby... 	-- The Late Elvis Presley.
Bacchus, n.: A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Bachelor: Plays the field until the field comes in.
Bachelors have consciences, married men have wives. H. L. Mencken
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't, they'd be married too. H. L. Mencken
Back Up My Hard Drive? I Can't Find The Reverse Switch
Back Up My Hard Drive? I Can't Find The Reverse Switch!
Back Up My Hard Drive? I don't have a license yet
Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other!
Back up my hard drive?  I can't find the reverse switch!
Backup - originally to take a security copy of a program or file. Now used interchageably with pirate and steal.
Backup is for whimps.
Backup no encontrado ! : (R)eintento, (P)nico ?
Backup not found : (A)bort, (R)etry, (P)anic ?
Backup not found!  A)bort, R)etry or P)anic?
Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (P)anic
Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (S)ell Computer
Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (S)lap nearest innocent bystander.
Bacon & eggs - Hens are involved but pigs are commited.
Bacteria acts more intelligent than human beings
Bacteria, n.: the only culture some people have.
Bad Case #12: Nostalgia buff with amnesia.
Bad Command or Filename.  Or maybe you screwed up.
Bad Credit ? No Credit ? No Problem. No Money ? Problem.
Bad Latinum sometimes comes back.
Bad artists always admire each other's work. Oscar Wilde
Bad command or file name  Go stand in the corner.
Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.
Bad command or file name. Go sit in corner.
Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay..
Bad dog! Don't chew the power cor..!# NO TERRIER
Bad is never good until worse happens.
Bad luck is being run over by the welcome wagon.
Bad men are full of repentance. Aristotle
Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote. George Jean Nathan
Bad officials: elected by good citizens who fail to vote.
Bad taste is a species of bad morals. Christian Nestell Bovee
Bad weather reports are more often right than good ones.
Badges?  We don't need no stinkin' badges!
Badness comes in waves.
Bagdikian's Observation: Trying to be a first-rate reporter on the average American newspaper is like trying to play Bach's "St. Matthew Passion" on a ukelele.
Bagnolet : A good Place To Be From - Far From !
Bajoran phasers - because it's better to be sure than sorry.
Baker's First Law of Federal Geometry: 	A block grant is a solid mass of money surrounded on all sides 	by governors.
Bald spot? No -- solar panel for brain power.
Bald: follicularly challenged.
Ban the bomb.  Save the world for conventional warfare.
Bang, you're dead !
Bank error in your favor.  Collect $200.
Banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies. Thomas Jefferson
Barach's Rule: An alcoholic is a person who drinks more than his own physician.
Barfigngen: Car Sickness in a Volkswagen.
Barney and Baby Bop MUST DIE
Barnum was wrong....it's more like every 30 seconds
Barometer, n.: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Barth's Distinction: There are two types of people: those who divide people into two types, and those who don't.
Baruch's Observation: If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
Base 10 numbers are still not accepted by a number of older people who grew up with shillings and crowns.
Base 2 is a difficult base for computers to perform arithmetic in, particularly if the task involves variables, negative, fixed or floating point numbers.
Basic Airline Flying-Keep the pointy end forward..
Basic Airline Flying: Keep the pointy end forward
Basic research is what I am doing when I don't know what I'm doing. Wernher von Braun
Basic, n.: A programming language.  Related to certain social diseases in that those who have it will not admit it in polite company.
Bastards do have a redeemable feature:  mortality.
Batches, batches, we don' need no steenkin' batches!
Bathroom scale: Something you stand on and swear at.
Batman IS Mr.Mom?!?!
Batman, was around here somewhere
Be Alert! - the world needs more Lerts.
Be Nice to Your Enemies, It Drives Them Nuts.
Be Prepared Boy Scout Motto
Be a Lert ! What the world needs is more Lerts !
Be a better psychiatrist and the world will beat a psychopath to your door.
Be affectionate to one who adores you.
Be alert, the world needs more lerts.
Be as you would seem to be.
Be ashamed to die until you have won some victory for humanity. Horace Mann
Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most Souls would scarcely get your Feet wet.  Fall not in Love, therefore: it will stick to your face. | National Lampoon, "Deteriorada"
Be bold, and mighty forces will come to your aid.
Be bold. If you're going to make an error, make a doozey, and don't be afraid to hit the ball. Billie Jean King
Be both a speaker of words and a doer of deeds.
Be braver.  You cannot cross a chasm in two small jumps.
Be careful  Is it classified?
Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. Mark Twain
Be careful of reading health books, you might die of a misprint. | Mark Twain
Be careful out there. There are things that go bump in the night. Actually, there are things that go 'Give me your wallet or I'll kill you' in the night. John Larroquette, actor-1994
Be careful what you pretend to be because you are what you pretend to be. Kurt Vonnegut, author
Be careful what you swallow. Chew! Gwendolyn Brooks, poet, advice to graduates, Buena Vista University Graduation, 1995
Be careful what you wish for, you might get it.
Be careful what you wish, it might come true.
Be careful when a loop exits to the same place from side and bottom.
Be careful!  Is it classified?
Be careful, the last person using this keyboard had a terminal disease.
Be carefull out there
Be careless in your dress if you must, but keep a tidy soul. Mark Twain
Be cautious in your daily affairs.
Be cheerful while you are alive.
Be civil to all; sociable to many; familiar with few. Benjamin Franklin
Be consistent - but don't do it all the time.
Be convinced that to be happy means to be free and that to be free means to be brave. Therefore do not take lightly the perils of war. Thucydides
Be different DON'T speak your mind!
Be different: conform.
Be excellent to each other..
Be free and open and breezy  Enjoy  Things won't get any better so get used to it.
Be good to your environment -- purge your tree.
Be good; if you can't be good, have fun.
Be happy while you're living, For you're a long time dead. Scottish Proverb
Be happy with the real pleasures in life.
Be kind and considerate to others, depending somewhat upon who they are. Don Herold
Be kind to unkind people, they need it the most. Anonymous
Be kind to your inferiors, if you can find any.
Be kind. Remember everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.
Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there. Josh Billings
Be moderate where pleasure is concerned, avoid fatigue.
Be more concerned with your character than with your reputation. Your character is what you really are while your reputation is merely what others think you are. John Wooden
Be nice on your way up, you'll meet on the way down.
Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down. Wilson Mizner
Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home.
Be not afraid of growing slowly, be afraid only of standing still. Chinese Proverb
Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be. Thomas a Kempis
Be on your guard against a silent dog and still water. Latin Proverb
Be part of the solution -- not part of the problem.
Be part of the solution not part of the polution
Be part of the solution, not part of the pollution.
Be part of the solution--not part of the problem
Be patient with those who are slower than you, for they make you look better.
Be security conscious - National defense is at stake.
Be seeing you.
Be self-reliant and your success is assured.
Be slow in choosing a friend, but slower in changing him. Scottish Proverb
Be slow of Giving advice, ready to do a service.
Be sure not to start a tagline you can't finis
Be sure the brain is engaged before putting the mouth in gear.
Be sure to treat your assumptions as though they are reality.
Be sure to use DEVICE=EXXON to screw up your environment.
Be suspicious of all native-born Esperanto speakers.
Be tactful; overlook not your own opportunity.
Be the first to say what is self-evident, and you are immortal. M. Ebner-Eschenbach
Be there a will and wisdom finds a way.
Be thine enemy an ant, see in him an elephant.. Turkish Proverb
Be valiant, but not too venturous.  Let thy attire be comely, but not costly.
Be vewy vewy quiet. I'm hunting wabbits.
Be virtuous and you will be eccentric.
Be wary of strong drink.  It can make you shoot at tax collectors and miss | Lazarus Long, "Time Enough for Love"
Be wewy wewy quiet...I'm hunting Womulins
Be wiser than other people if you can; but do not tell them so. Lord Chesterfield
Beam me aboard Scotty.  Aye, will a 2x4 do captain?
Beam me aboard, Scotty ! A 2x4, sir ?
Beam me up Scottie, there's no intelligent life down here.
Beam me up Scotty. There's no intelligent life down here.| Capt. James T. Kirk
Beam me up Scotty. This isn't the men's room.
Beam me up, Scotty
Beam me up, Scotty!
Beam me up, Scotty, This planet sucks
Beam me up, Scotty, but leave the others here.
Beam me up, Scotty. There's no intelligent life down here.|J.T. Kirk
Beam me up, there's no intelligent life here
Beam me up, there's no intelligent life here !
Beat it through the lines
Beat me, whip me, make me read my Qmail
Beaten paths are for beaten men.
Beauty and grace command the world. Park Benjamin
Beauty and harmony are as necessary to you as the very breath of life.
Beauty faded has no second spring.
Beauty is an outward gift which is seldom despised, except by those to whom it has been refused. Edward Gibbon
Beauty is but skin deep, but what of Cardassians?
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder....
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder Proverb
Beauty is not caused. It is. Emily Dickinson
Beauty is only skin deep Proverb
Beauty is only skin deep, but it's a valuable asset if you're poor or haven't any sense. Kin Hubbard
Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.|
Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clear to the bone.
Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes right to the bone...
Beauty is power; a smile is its sword. Charles Reade
Beauty is skin deep, ugly goes to the bone.
Beauty is the first present nature gives to women and the first it takes away. George Brossin Mr
Beauty seldom recommends one to another.
Beauty seldom recommends one woman to another.
Beauty times brains equals a constant.
Beauty when most unclothed is clothed best. Phineas Fletcher
Beauty without grace is a violet without scent.
Beauty without virtue is a curse.
Because everyone uses language to talk, everyone thinks he can talk about language. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Because just as good morals, if they are to be maintained, have need of the laws, so the laws, if they are to be observed, have need of good morals. Niccol Machiavelli
Because the wine remembers.
Because, unlike =some= Robin Hoods, I can speak with an English accent
Become a millionaire, send $1.00 for details...
Become a possibilitarian. No matter how dark things seem to be or actually are, raise your sights and see possibilities - always see them, for they're always there. Norman Vincent Peale
Become a programmer and never see the world !
Bedfellows make strange politicians.
Been Transferred Lately?
Been there, done that, got the T-shirt.
Been there, done that, the T-shirt cost too much.
Beep ! Invalid Input. I take only cash.
Beep Invalid Input.  I take only cash....
Beep, Beep... nope, not felix the cat...
Beer cans empty! Memory Full! Zzzzzzzzzz!!!
Beer isn't just for breakfast anymore.|Bumper sticker
Beer!  It's not just for breakfast anymore.....
Beer's Law - you get drunk if you drink too much beer.
Beer. It's not just for breakfast anymore!
Beethoven always sounds to me like the upsetting of a bag of nails, with here and there an also dropped hammer. John Ruskin
Before a marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you've said; after marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish saying it. Helen Rowland
Before advising "Be yourself!" reassess his character.
Before backing up, make a backup.
Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which one you need more.
Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need more.
Before something goes wrong, there's always someone who knew it would.
Before you guys came along, we hunted and fished when we wanted to, the women did all the work, and we paid no taxes. And you thought you could improve on this system? Indians have to deal with four 'B.C.'s: Before Christ, Before Columbus, Before Custer, and before Costner.' Adam Fortunate Eagle
Before you louse something up, THIMK!
Before you meet any handsome price, you have to kiss a lot of toads.
Beggars can't be choosers Proverb
Beggars should be no choosers.
Begin at the beginning and go on till you come to the end; then stop. Lewis Carrol, from Alice in Wonderland
Begin well, end badly; begin badly, end worse.
Behavior is a mirror in which every one displays his image. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Behaviorism is the art of pulling habits out
Behaviorist psychology -- pulling habits out of rats.
Behind an able man there are always other able men. Chinese Proverb
Behind every argument is someone's ignorance.
Behind every great man there is a suprised woman. Maryon Pearson
Behind every succesfull man is woman with nothing to wear
Behind every succesfull man is woman with nothing to wear.
Behind every successful man you'll find a woman with nothing to wear.
Behind your back, your colleagues are talking about Jeckyl and Hyde.
Behold I do not give lectures or a little charity, When I give I give myself. Walt Whitman
Behold the turtle. He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out. James Bryant Conant
Behold the warranty ... the bold print giveth and the fine print taketh away.
Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! It is like the precious ointment upon the head, that ran down upon the beard, even Aaron's beard: that went down to the skirts of his garments. Psalms 133:1-2
Beifeld's Principle: The probability of a young man meeting a desirable and receptive young female increases by pyramidal progression when he is already in the company of: (1) a date, (2) his wife, (3) a better looking and richer male friend.
Being Politically Correct means always having to say you're sorry. Charles Osgood
Being a woman is a terribly difficult task since it consists principally in dealing with men. Joseph Conrad
Being able to say NO is the root to reclaiming your life.
Being busy does not always mean real work. The object of all work is production or accomplishment and to either of these ends there must be forethought, system, planning, intelligence, and honest purpose, as well as perspiration. Seeming to do is not doing. Thomas Alva Edison
Being in politics is like being a football coach. You have to be smart enough to understand the game and dumb enough to think it's important. Eugene McCarthy
Being is. Being is in-itself. Being is what it is. Jean-Paul Sartre
Being natural is simply a pose.
Being old sucks!
Being one man too many, Ensign Extra is booted off the E.
Being paranoid doesn't mean they _aren't_ out to get you!
Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't. Margaret Thatcher
Being too good is apt to be uninterresting. Harry S Truman
Being young is...I don't remember anymore!
Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man. Thomas Paine
Believe me : it's a hardware problem or a virus !
Believe nothing and be on your guard against everything. Latin Proverb
Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact. William James
Believe you are defeated, believe it long enough, and it is likely to become a fact. Norman Vincent Peale
Bell Labs Unix -- Reach out and grep someone.
Bell's Rule: The average time between throwing something away and needing it badly is two weeks.  This time can be reduced to one week by retaining the thing for a long time first.
Best file compression around  "DEL *.*" - 100% comp.
Best file compressor around: DEL *.* (100% compression)
Best to bend it while it's a twig.
Best way to be useful : stay out of the way.
Beta Testers do it first!
Beta testing is hazardous to your health.
Beta version - too buggy to be released.
Better a bird in the hand than one overhead.
Better a dish of illusion and a hearty appetite for life, than a feast of reality and indigestion therewith. Harry A. Overstreet
Better a mouse in the pot than no meat at all. Romanian Proverb
Better an ounce of luck than a pound of gold. Yiddish Proverb
Better an ugly face than an ugly mind. James Ellis
Better be ill spoken of by one before all than by all before one. Scottish Proverb
Better be safe than sorry.
Better break your word than do worse in keeping it. Thomas Fuller
Better dead than mellow.
Better hazard once than always be in fear. Thomas Fuller
Better late than never Proverb
Better late than never.
Better late than really late.
Better living a beggar than buried an emperor.
Better or worse, but never the same.
Better pointed bullets than pointed speeches. Otto von Bismarck
Better safe than sorry Proverb
Better shun the bait than struggle in the snare. John Dryden
Better than counting your years is making all your years count.
Better the devil you know than the Ferengi you don't.
Better the foot slip than the tongue.
Better to die ten thousand deaths than wound my honor. Joseph Addison
Better to face a danger once than be always in fear.
Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness Chinese Proverb
Better to light one candle than to curse the darkness.
Better to marry a man who loves you than one you love.
Better to see the face than to hear the name. Zen Saying
Better to send ten ambulances when they are not needed than one when it is.
Better to understand little than misunderstand a lot.
Better to use medicines at the outset than at the last moment.
Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship. Oscar Wilde
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before. -- Mae West.
Between two evils, always pick the one you never tried before.
Between two evils, choose neither; between two goods, choose both. Tryon Edwards
Beverly can turn Data off but only Tasha can turn him on
Beverly, Tasha and Deanna: A Menag a Trois?
Beware ! I'm armed and have premenstrual tension.
Beware low flying ducks
Beware of Bigfoot
Beware of Bigfoot!
Beware of Geeks bearing gifs.
Beware of Geeks bearing grifts.
Beware of Greeks bearing gifts Proverb
Beware of Klingons bearing gifts.
Beware of Programmers who carry screwdrivers. | Leonard Brandwein
Beware of a dark-haired man with a loud tie.
Beware of a half truth; you may be getting the wrong half.
Beware of a man of one book. English Proverb
Beware of a man's shadow and a bee's sting. Burmese Proverb
Beware of a new virus:'MICROSOFT WINDOWS'. Slows a 486 down to a XT
Beware of a tall dark man with a spoon up his nose.
Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes.
Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes. -- Thoreau.
Beware of attacking SPEED HUMPS!
Beware of dark rooms ... They might be the morgue.
Beware of friends who are false and deceitful.
Beware of geeks bearing .GIFS !
Beware of geeks bearing graft.
Beware of little expenses. A small leak can sink a ship.
Beware of little expenses. A small leak will sink a big ship. Benjamin Franklin
Beware of little expenses; a small leak will sink a great ship. Benjamin Franklin
Beware of low flying butterflies.
Beware of low-flying butterflies.
Beware of low-flying rocks.
Beware of men who won't be bothered with details
Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers.
Beware of quantum ducks.       Quark     Quark
Beware of quantum ducks: Quark, Quark.
Beware of rashness, but with energy, and sleepless vigilance, go forward and give us victories. Abraham Lincoln
Beware of the Turing Tar-pit in which everything is possible but nothing of interest is easy.
Beware of the man who knows the answer before he understands the question.
Beware of the opinion of someone without any facts.
Beware of the young doctor and the old barber. Benjamin Franklin
Beware of what you ask of the Gods, for they may...
Beware prejudices. They are like rats, and men's minds are like traps; prejudices get in easily, but it is doubtful if they ever get out. Lord Jeffrey
Beware the Jubjub bird
Beware the fury of a patient man.                  Dryden
Beware the fury of a patient man. John Dryden
Beware the fury of a patient man. Publius Syrus
Beware the legless man who teaches running.
Beware the low flying butterfly.
Beware the man with white feathers and an orange mouth, for he is a duck in disguise.
Beware the new TTY code
Beware the new TTY code!
Beware the thirty-first of November.
Beware the wise man giving Latinum.
Beware!  I'm armed and have premenstrual tension.
BhlarneyStone: For benchmarking vapourware.
Big Ideas are so hard to recognize, so fragile, so easy to kill. Don't forget that, all of you who don't have them. John Elliot, Jr.
Big book, big bore.
Big doesn't necessarily mean better. Sunflowers aren't better than violets. Edna Ferber
Big nostrils? Look at your finger size!
Big shots are only little shots who keep shooting. Christopher Morley
Big things come in .QWK packages.
Bigamist = Italian fog
Bigamist: One who makes the same mistake twice.
Bigamy : one wife to many. Monogamy : one wife to many.
Bigamy is having one spouse too many.  Monogamy is the same.
Bigamy: Too many wives. Monogamy: Same thing.
Bigamy: one wife too many. Monogamy: see Bigamy.
Biggest security gap - an open mouth.
Bigomy: one wife to many.  Monogamy: same idea.
Bigotry and intolerance, silenced by argument, endeavors to silence by persecution, in old days by fire and sword, in modern days by the tongue. Charles Simmons
Bigotry dwarfs the soul by shutting out the truth. Edwin Hubbel Chapin' The mind of the bigot is like the pupil of the eye; the more light you pour upon it, the more it will contract. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Bigotry murders religion to frighten fools with her ghost. Charles Caleb Colton
Bill Gates made $6.3 Billion selling us MS-DOS?
Bill Gates, have 'em write _real_ code...
Bill Gates, have them write *real* code !
Bill and Ted's excellent adventure happened in Florida
Binary, adj.: Possessing the ability to have friends of both sexes.
Bioengineers wear designer genes.
Biography should be written by an acute enemy.
Biography: One of the terrors of death.
Biology grows on you.
Bipolar, adj.: Refers to someone who has homes in Nome, Alaska, and Buffalo, New York
Bird lives.
Birds are trapped by their feet, people by their tongues.
Birds of a feather flock together
Birth, n.: The first and direst of all disasters. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Bit :  The increment by which programmers slowly go mad.
Bit Decay ?  Dd y s  Dy 
Biz is better.
Bizarreness is the essence of the exotic
Bire qui coule ne manque pas de mousse.
Bla bla bla bla bla bla bla
Black Holes are Out of Sight
Black Holes happened when God divided by Zero.
Black Holes were created when God divided by zero.
Black holes are outa sight!
Black holes are where God forgot to cancel the infinities
Black holes resulted when MS tried to beat a deadline!
Black holes resulted when Micro$oft tried to beat a deadline !
Black holes suck.
Blackberries are red when they are green.
Blah.
Blam! Blam! Click..Click.. um.. "Stop, Police!" - only in Victoria!
Blame is safer than praise. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Blessed are the Greeks
Blessed are the meek, for they shall inhibit the earth.
Blessed are the pessimists ; they make backups !
Blessed are the pessimists, for they make backups.
Blessed are the young, for they will inherit the national debt. Herbert Hoover.
Blessed are they that run around in circles, for they shall be known as wheels.
Blessed are they who Go Around in Circles, for they Shall be Known as Wheels.
Blessed is he that expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed. -- Poor Richard.
Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed. Johnathan Swift
Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he will never be dissappointed. Benjamin Franklin
Blessed is the influence of one true, loving human soul on another. George Eliot
Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact. George Eliot
Blessed is the man who, having nothing to stay, abstains from giving us worthy evidence of the fact. George Eliot
Blessed our young they will inherit our national debt.
Blessings ever wait on virtuous deeds, and though a late, a sure reward succeeds. William Congreve
Blessings never come in pairs; misfortunes never alone.
Blindness Hatred is blind, as well as love. Thomas Fuller
Bliss *IS* ignorance
Blonde Klingons: because it was a good day to dye.
Blood alone moves the wheels of history. Benito Mussolini
Blood is a cleansing and sanctifying thing, and the nation that regards it as the final horror has lost its manhood ... there are many things more horrible than bloodshed, and slavery is one of them! Padraic Pearse
Blood is thicker than water, and much tastier.
Blood is thicker than water, and tastier.
Blood is thicker than water.  Tastier and more nutritious too.
Blood will tell, but often it tells too much. Don Marquis
Blow - opposite of Buv.
Blow your mind - smoke gunpowder.
Blows are sarcasms turned stupid. George Eliot
Blue dove...the crackerjack is on the windowsill.
Blue... No, yelloooooooooooooow
Bluegrass is not just a weed.
Bo Knows MegaMail!
Bo Peep did it for the insurance.
Bo knows Taglines!
Bo knows your girlfriend.
Bohr Theory - the result of long chemistry lectures.
Boldly going Forward because we can't find Reverse
Boldly going Forward because we can't find Reverse!
Boldly going where no modem has gone before...
Boldness is a child of ignorance. Francis Bacon
Boldness is a mask for fear, however great. Lucan
Boldness is ever blind, for it sees not dangers and inconveniences whence it is bad in council though good in execution. Francis Bacon
Boling's postulate: If you're feeling good, don't worry.  You'll get over it.
Bolub's Fourth Law of Computerdom: Project teams detest weekly progress reporting because it so vividly manifests their lack of progress.
Bombs don't kill people, explosions kill people.
Bond. James Bond.|Pick up line
Bones, I hate your #@!*% human guts. Discussion?
Bonking with Barbie..
Boob's Law: You always find something in the last place you look.
Book never written: "Dog training." by Wille Bite
Bookie - pickpocket who lets you use your own hands.
Books are not men and yet they stay alive. Stephen Vincent Bent
Books, like friends, should be few and well chosen. Joineriana
Books, like friends, should be few and well chosen. Samuel Paterson
Boot & ye shall see. Replace & all will be made clear.
Borderline psychotic with hermit-like tendencys.
Bore, n.: A person who talks when you wish him to listen. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Bore: A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
Bored at 3:00 a.m. ? PSSSTTT - got a modem ?
Bored? Drive the speed limit... in your garage.
Boren's Laws: (1) When in charge, ponder. (2) When in trouble, delegate. (3) When in doubt, mumble.
Borg Empire: Equal opportunity Assimilator
Borg Mail Reader v2.1a  Tagline theft is futile.
Borg Mail Reader v2.1a  Taglines are irrelevent.
Borg Spreadsheet: Locutus 1-2-3
Borg saying: We came. We absorbed. We left.
Borg spreadsheet program:  Locutus 1-2-3
Borg spreadsheet: Locutus 1-2-3
Borg?  Where?  I don't se*(#$#..NO CARRIER
BorgBurgers - We do it our way; your way is irrelevant.
BorgBurgers: We do it OUR way. Yours is irrelevant
BorgDOS v5.0  - Assimilate Another? [Y/n]
Borger King - We do it our way Your way is irrelevant
Borger King: Have it our way. Your way is irrelevant.
Borger King: We do it our way. Yours is irrelevant.
Born Again Virgin.
Born crying, live complaining, die disappointed.
Born in iniquity and conceived in sin, the spirit of nationalism has never ceased to bend human institutions to the service of dissension and distress. Thorstein Veblen
Born to be Wiiiillllllddddddddddd
Borrow trouble for yourself, if that's your nature, but don't lend it to your neighbors. Rudyard Kipling
Boss spelled backwards is "double-SOB"
Boss, n.: According to the Oxford English Dictionary, in the Middle Ages the words "boss" and "botch" were largely synonymous, except that boss, in addition to meaning "a supervisor of workers" also meant "an ornamental stud."
Bosses are so busy delegating jobs, they have no time to work.
Boston, n.: Ludwig van Beethoven being jeered by 50,000 sports fans for finishing second in the Irish jig competition.
Both mind and heart when given up to reveries and dreaminess, have a thousand avenues open for the entrance of evil. Charles Simmons
Both of his feet are firmly planted in the air.
Both the cockroach and the bird could get along very well without us, although the cockroach would miss us most. Joseph Wood Krutch
Bother, said Pooh, as Q destroyed the universe.
Bought some powdered water..not sure what to add, though.
Bourbon. Tallulah Bankhead, last word
Bow down to Rick Wakeman
Boy Am I Tired! It Must Be The NET-LAG!
Boy, Deluxe sure is QWK.
Boy, n.: A noise with dirt on it.
Boy, that's bad!!
Boy: A noise with dirt on it.
Boycott Clockwork Peach.
Boycott meat - suck your thumb.
Boycott shampoo! Demand the REAL poo!
Boyle's Law - if you heat water high enough it will boil
Boys are beyond the range of anybody's sure understanding, at least when they are between the ages of 18 months and 90 years. James Thurber
Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.
Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men. Kin Hubbard
Bozo, I don't think we're in DOS anymore...
Brady's First Law of Problem Solving: When confronted by a difficult problem, you can solve it more easily by reducing it to the question, "How would the Lone Ranger have handled this?"
Bragg Equation - he made an equation so he could brag
Brain Disengaged; Call Back Tomorrow.
Brain damage? No thanks, I already have some.
Brain disfunction detected....
Brain fried -- Core dumped
Brain fried -- Memory dumped.
Brain over - Insert coin
Brain, n.: The apparatus with which we think that we think. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Brain, v. [as in "to brain"]: To rebuke bluntly, but not pointedly; to dispel a source of error in an opponent. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Brain: The apparatus with which we think that we think.
Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.
Brain: apparatus used to think we think.
Break up a relationship - buy a computer
Breaking Windows isn't just for kids anymore...
Breast Feeding should not be attempted by fathers with hairy chests, since they can make the baby sneeze and give it wind. | Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"
Breast size multiplied by IQ always equals 69
Breast size times I.Q. is constant.
Breath Deep, The Gathering Gloom...
Breathes there the man with soul so dead, Who never to himself hath said, This is my own, my native land! Walter Scott
Breathing may be hazardous to your health.
Breeding rabbits is a hare raising experience.
Brevis esse laboro, obscurus fio. (When I labor to be brief, I become obscure.) Horace, from Ars Poetica
Brevity There's a great power in words, if you don't hitch too many of them together. Josh Billings
Brevity and conciseness are the parents of correction. Hosea Ballou
Brevity is a great charm of eloquence. Cicero
Brevity is the best recommendation of speech, whether in a senator or an orator. Cicero
Brevity is the soul of wit.
Bride, n.: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Bride: a woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
Bring Windows to it's knees:  Start an application
Bring back the dobro to rock n roll!
Bring home the bacon?  HECK  I Brought the PIG
Bring me a bug and I will pummel it to pieces.
Bring order to your life, use random numbers.
Bring out your dead!
Bringing computers into the home won't change either one, but may revitalize the corner saloon.
Britannia waives the rules.
Broad-minded is just another way of saying a fellow's too lazy to form an opinion. Will Rogers
Broad-mindedness, n.: The result of flattening high-mindedness out.
Broadway has been very good to me. But then, I've been very good to broadway. Ethel Merman
Brook's Law: Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later
Brooke's Law: Whenever a system becomes completely defined, some damn fool discovers something which either abolishes the system or expands it beyond recognition.
Brooklyn -- the Fertile Crescent of Civilization
Brotherhood is not just a Bible word. Out of comradeship can come and will come the happy life for all. Heywood Broun
Brotherhood is the very price and condition of man's surval. Carlos P. Romulo
Brought to you by the Mother of all Messages.
Brought to you by the letters O & S and by the number 2.
Bubble Memory, n.: A derogatory term, usually referring to a person's intelligence.  See also "vacuum tube".
Bucy's Law: Nothing is ever accomplished by a reasonable man.
Bud said,`Let there be lite' and there was Lite.
Buddhism means never having to say you're sorry.
Budget: an orderly system of living beyond your means.
Buenos dias. Cmo ests?
Buffalo is not just the name of an animal.
Buffer - Member of Whitehall gentlemans club. Alternatively, a place to store data temporarily until a processor is ready for it.
Bug - when your computer tells you 2+2=TUESDAY you have a bug. See Feature.
Bug free, cheap, on time, works.  Pick two.
Bug off, Banana Nose; Relieve mine eyes
Bug, n.: An aspect of a computer program which exists because the PROGRAMMER was thinking about Jumbo Jacks or stock options when s/he wrote the program.
Bug: Small living things that small living boys throw on small living girls.
Bugger me with a fish fork..
Bugs are Sons of Glitches.
Bugs are sons of glitches
Bugs, like coathangers, breed if unobserved.
Build a system even a fool can use, and only a fool will use it.
Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will want to use it.
Build something foolproof and every fool will use it.
Build something that even a fool can use, and only a fool will want to use it. -- C. Shaw.
Building Contractors, not to be confused with homemakers
Bullets speak louder than reason.
Bullshit Detector. When alarm sounds, please re-engage your brain.
Bullshit makes the flowers grow and that's beautiful.
Bumper sticker on a hearse:  I'd rather be breathing
Bumper sticker: Auntie Em: Hate you, hate Kansas, taking dog. Dorothy
Bungee Diving - Living it up when you're going down!
Bungee Jumper? Catch you on the rebound.
Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time when the quo has lost its status. Laurence J. Peter
Bureaucracy: That place always in need of a laxative.
Bureaucracy: a method for transforming energy into solid waste.
Bureaucrat, n.: A politician who has tenure.
Bureaucratic organization is like a septic tank: the big chunks rise to the top
Bureaucrats are the meat loaf of humanity.
Bureaucrats cut red tape... lengthwise!
Bureaucrats do not change the course of the ship of state. They merely adjust the compass.
Burma Shave.
Burp.
Burroughs programmers have to pay a Poll tax.
Bus error (Passengers dumped)
Bus error -- Core dumped
Bush / Quayle   ERROR: Division by zero.
Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company can operate without. Anonymous
Business is like a wheelbarrow. Nothing ever happens until you start pushing. Anonymous
Business is like oil, it won't mix with anything but business.
Business is like riding a bicycle. Either you keep moving or you fall down. John D. Wright For age is opportunity no less Than youth itself, though in another dress; And as the evening twilight slips away, The sky is filled with stars, invisible by day. -Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Business is never so healthy as when, like a chicken, it must do a certain amount of scratching for what it gets. Henry Ford
Business will be either better or worse.  --Calvin Coolidge
Busy? I just spent four hours burying the cat.
But America is a great, unwieldy Body. Its Progress must be slow.... Like a Coach and sixthe swiftest Horses must be slackened and the slowest quickened, that all may keep an even Pace. John Quincy Adams
But Captain--the engines can't take this much longer
But Captain--the engines can't take this much longer!
But Honey, you NEED VGA for Dbase management !
But I DID read the manual...
But I don't like Spam
But I don't like Spam!
But I thought YOU did the backups...
But Ma, Johnny has all of his doors registerd!
But Windows bashing is my job...
But does Bo know double diamonds?
But friendship is precious, not only in the shade, but in the sunshine of life; and thanks to a benevolent arrangement of things, the greater part of life is sunshine. Thomas Jefferson
But in a larger sense we cannot dedicate, we cannot consecrate, we cannot hallow this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it far above our poor power to add or detract. Abraham Lincoln
But in our enthusiasm, we could not resist a radical overhaul of the system, in which all of its major weaknesses have been exposed, analyzed, and replaced with new weaknesses. | Bruce Leverett, "Register Allocation in Optimizing Compilers"
But let judgment run down as waters, and righteousness as a mighty stream. Amos 5:24.
But man is not made for defeat. A man can be destroyed but not defeated. Ernest Hemingway
But my little voice TOLD me to do it!
But of course, it *is* only my opinion.
But once you are real, you can't become unreal again.
But really, it was EXACTLY the same as before...
But scientists, who ought to know Assure us that it must be so. Oh, let us never, never doubt What nobody is sure about. | Hilaire Belloc
But society has now fairly got the better of individuality; and the danger which threatens human nature is not the excess, but the deficiency, of personal Impulses and preferences. John Stuart Mill
But soft you, the fair Ophelia: Ope not thy ponderous and marble jaws, But get thee to a nunnery -- go | Mark "The Bard" Twain
But soft, what bird through yonder window breaks?
But then I saw her face, now I'm a believer.| The Monkeys
But then again, I like cold toilet seats.
But what if I'm a figment of MY imagination?
But what if I'm a figment of my OWN imagination?
But which one is the fatherboard?
But you shall not escape my iambics.
But, boss, this IS part of my job !
But, officer, I was only going ONE way !
Butterfliers are free
Buy  Amdahl Stock to go up 100 points next week.
Buy Land Now.  It's Not Being Made Any More.
Buy a 486-33 you can reboot faster.
Buy a Mac. It can do SOMETHING right.
Buy in haste, repair at leisure.
Buy low, sell high.
Buy one, get one free? Does it have to be in that order?
Buy!  Amdahl Stock to go up 100 points next week.
Buying on trust is the way to pay double. Anonymous
By afflictions God is spoiling us of what otherwise might have spoiled us. When he makes the world too hot for us to hold, we let it go. John Powell
By all means, let's not confuse ourselves by the facts.
By annihilating the desires, you annihilate the mind. Every man without passions has within him no principle of actn, nor motive to act. Claude Adrien Helvtius
By asking for the impossible, obtain the best possible. Italian Proverb
By common consent gray hairs are a crown of glory; the only object of respect that can never excite envy. George Bancroft
By doing just a little every day, you can gradually let the task completely overwhelm you.
By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.
By following the good, you learn to be good.
By getting up a costume charity ball. Ogden Nash, from Pride Goeth Before a Raise
By gnawing through a dike, even a rat may drown a nation. Edmund Burke
By nature's kindly disposition most questions which it is beyond a man's power to answer do not occur to him at all. George Santayana
By nature, men are nearly alike; by practice, they get to be far apart.
By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation. OscaWilde
By protracting life, we do not deduct one jot from the duration of death.
By reading this, you're either a lawyer or a nut
By starving emotions we become humorless, rigid and stereotyped; by repressing them we become literal, reformatory and holier-than-thou; encouraged, they perfume life; discouraged, they poison it. Joseph Collins
By the age of twenty, any young man should know whether or not he is to be a specialist and just where his tastes lie. By postponing the question we have set on immaturity a premium which controls most American personality to its deathbed. Robert S. Hillyer
By the time I have money to burn, my fire will be out.
By the time a man reads women like a book he's too old to collect a library.
By the time you get to where you can make ends meet, someone moves the ends.
By the yard, life is hard.  By the inch, it's a cinch.
By this I mean that a political society does not live to conduct foreign policy; it would be more correct to say that it conducts foreign policy in order to live. George F. Kennan
By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest. Confucius
By trying we can easily endure adversity. Another man's, I mean. Mark Twain
By trying we can easily learn to endure adversityanother man's I mean. Mark Twain
By trying we can learn to endure another's adversity.
By vulgarity I mean that vice of civilization which makes man ashamed of himself and his next of kin, and pretend to be somebody else. Solomon Schechter
Bye Kids
Bye Kids!
C Programmers do it with models !
C Programmers do it with the LARGE model !
C code.  C code run.  Run, code, run... PLEASE !
C code.  C code run. Run code, run.
C code. C code run. Run, code, run... PLEASE !
C is for Bangers.
C program run, C program crash, C programmer cry.
C program run. C program crash. C programmer quit.
C++ classes - call for times and dates !
C++ programmers do it with class.
C++ programmers earns money by inheritence.
C, n.: A programming language that is sort of like Pascal except more like assembly except that it isn't very much like either one, or anything else.  It is either the best language available to the art today, or it isn't. | Ray Simard
C-ing is believing
C-ing is believing (this one is for you, Gilles !)
C-ing is believing (this one is for you, Gilles, though I don't agree !)
C-ing is believing.
C:\> SWEEP ECHO Y|DEL *.* <
C:\BELFRY is where I keep my .BAT files ^^^oo^^^
C:\DAMSEL.EXE crosslinked w/DISTRESS.COM--RESCUE?(y/n)
C:\DOS   C:\DOS\RUN    RUN\DOS\RUN
C:\DOS  C:\DOS\RUN  C:\DOS\CRASH
C:\DOS  C:\DOS\RUN  C:\DOS\RUN\WINDOWS  C:\DOS\RUN\SLOW
C:\DOS  C:\DOS\RUN  C:\DOS\RUN\WINDOWS  C:\DOS\RUN\SLOW.
C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN C:\DOS\RUN\AMUCK
C:\PROGRAM\RUN RUN\PROGRAM\RUN AW\COMEON\PROGRAM\RUN!
CA Driving : to change lanes, first pull out your 9mm.
CA bumper sticker: Cover me, I'm changing lanes.
CABBAGE, n.: A familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head. Ambrose Bierce
CAIRO:  Just another city in Egypt.....
CANCER (June 21 - July 22) You are sympathetic and understanding to other people's problems. They think you are a sucker.  You are always putting things off. That's why you'll never make anything of yourself.  Most welfare recipients are Cancer people.
CAPITOL: n, the seat of misgovernment. Ambrose Bierce
CAPRICORN (Dec 23 - Jan 19) You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You don't do much of anything and are lazy.  There has never been a Capricorn of any importance.  Capricorns should avoid standing still for too long as they take root and become trees.
CAT: n, A lapwarmer with a built-in buzzer. Anonymous
CAT: n, A soft, indestructible automation provided by nature to be kicked when things go wrong in domestic circles. Ambrose Bierce
CAUTION:  Dangerous and off Medication...
CAUTION: Do Not Look Into Laser With Remaining Eye.
CAUTION: Do not install prior to installation.
CAUTION: INCORRIGABLE PUNSTER!  DON'T INCORRIGE
CC -G -A -Z  HELLO.C GOODBYE.C ABBEY.C ROAD.C  | Dennis M. Ritchie
CCITT  : Confused Corporations In Thrall to Terror
CCITT - Can't Conceive Intelligent Thoughts Today
CCITT : Confused Corporations In Thrall to Terror.
CChheecckk yyoouurr dduupplleexx sswwiittcchh..
CD-WOM, Wead Onwy Memowy.
CELEBRITY: A person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being reognized. Fred Allen
CELEBRITY: One who is known to many persons he is glad he doesn't know. H.L. Mencken
CENSOR: A man who knows more than he thinks you ought to. Granville Hicks
CEO of Dementia and Other Meaningless Entities.
CGA is the pallete from hell
CHARNOCK'S LAW: You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
CHEF: n, Any cook who swears in French. Anonymous
CHEIT'S LAMENT: If you help a friend in need he's sure to remember you - the next time he's in need.
CHEMICALS: n, Noxious substances from which modern foods are made. Anonymous
CHEOPS' LAW: Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.
CHIP:  One California hi-way patrolman.
CHOCOLATE: The other major food group.
CHRISTIAN: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbors. Ambrose Bierce
CINEMUCK: n, The combination of popcorn, soda, and melted chocolate which covers the floors of movie theaters. Anonymous
CLARK'S LAW:
COBOL : (C)ompiles (O)nly (B)ecause (O)f (L)uck.
COBOL can be cured if detected early.
COBOL can be cured with early detection !
COBOL programmers understand why women hate periods.
COBOL programmers wanted. (quick lighting pref.)
COBOL... (C)ompiles (O)nly (B)ecause (O)f (L)uck
COFFEE.COM not found: (A)bort, (R)eheat, (S)nooze
COFFEE.COM not found: A)dd more, R)eheat F)reak out.
COIT-MURPHY'S STATEMENT ON THE POWER OF NEGATIVE THINKING: It is impossible for an optimist to be pleasantly surprised.
COKE IS IT
COKE IS IT!
COLDBEER.CAN not found! Operator HALTED!
COLE's LAW - Thinly sliced cabbage.
COM program murdered. "Bits everywhere" says witness.
COMMAND, n: In computer science, a statement presented by a human and accepted by a computer in such a manner as to make the human feel as if he is in control. Anonymous
COMMAND.com will not respond...System Query: promote Lt.Cmdr.com?
COMMAND:  A suggestion made to a computer.
COMMENT Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song, A medley of extemporanea; And love is thing that can never go wrong; And I am Marie of Roumania. | Dorothy Parker
COMMERCE, n. A kind of transaction in which A plunders from B the goods of C, and for compensation B picks the pocket of D of money belonging to E. Ambrose Bierce
CONFERENCE: A gathering of important people who singly can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done. Fred Allen
CONNECT 110?!? Help! I'm in s l o w  m o t i o n !
CONNECT 300 ? Help ! I'm in s l o o o o o o w  m o t i o n  !
CONNOR'S SECOND LAW: If something is confidential it will be left in the copier machine.
CONSCIENCE: The inner voice that warns us that someone may be looking. H.L. Mencken
CONSERVATIVE: n, A statesman who is enamoured of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal, who wishes to replace them with others. Ambrose Bierce
CONSULTANT: Person who makes good on salesman's promises!
CONgress (n) - Opposite of PROgress
COOPER'S METALAW: A proliferation of new laws creates a proliferation of new loopholes.
CORNUELLE'S LAW: Authority tends to assign jobs to those least able to do them.
CORPORATION, n. An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility. Ambrose Bierce
COWARD, n.: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. Ambrose Bierce
CPAV Warning:(S)top (C)ontinue (B)urn infected disk
CPU - Random number generator
CRANE'S LAW: There ain't no such thing as a free lunch.
CRASH:  Normal termination.
CRIME CONTROL: Fire a warning shot into his HEART!
CRIMINAL: A person with predatory instincts who has not sufficient capital to form a corporation. Howard Scott
CRITIC, n: One who boasts of being 'hard to please' because nobody tries to please him. Ambrose Bierce
CRUISING : 19200bps modem and 0.5bps fingers !
CURSOR: What you become when your system crashes.
CYCLIC REDUNDANCY CHECK: Stocktaking at a Bike shop
CYNIC, n. a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be. Ambrose Bierce
Cab drivers are living proof that practice does not make perfect. Howard Ogden
Cabbage, n.: A familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Cahn's Axiom: When all else fails, read the instructions.
Calamities are of two kinds. Misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others. Ambrose Bierce
Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others. Ambrose Bierce
Calamity is man's true touchstone. Beaumont and Fletcher
Calamity is the perfect glass wherein we truly see and know ourselves. William Davenant
Calamity is the test of integrity. Samuel Richardson
Calamity is virtue's opportunity. Seneca
Calculation never made a hero. John Henry Newman
California has its faults.
California is a fine place to live -- if you happen to be an orange. | Fred Allen
California raisins murdered: Cereal Killer suspected
Californians are not without their faults.
Call The Bates Motel BBS: 1-800-BIG-NIFE
Call no man foe but never love a stranger. Stella Benson
Call on God, but row away from the rocks. Indian Proverb
Call on God, but row away from the rocks. | Indian proverb
Call waiting, great if you have two friends.
Call your Father today: I wish I still COULD!
Call your parents today : I wish I still COULD !
Calling Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard...
Calm down -- it's only ones and zeros.
Calm down! It's only zeros and ones.
Calm down. It's only ones and zeroes.
Calm down. It's only ones and zeros.
Calm self-confidence is as far from conceit as the desire to earn a decent living is remote from greed. Channing Pollock
Camera bugs always know where to light!
Camptown Races, 6837.6 Meters Long. Do Dah!
Can I blame my spelling on Line Noise ?
Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?|Pick up line
Can I call you Ms. Dos ?
Can I yell movie in a crowded firehouse ?
Can YOU fly ?
Can anyone remember when the times were not hard, and money not scarce?
Can anyone remember when times weren't hard and money wasn't scarce?
Can anything be sadder than work left unfinished?  Yes, work never begun.
Can anything be so elegant as to have few wants, and to serve them one's self? Ralph Waldo Emerson
Can elephants fly?
Can one preach at home inequality of races and nations and advocate abroad good-will towards all men? Dorothy Thompson
Can taglines have sequels?  Hmmm.....
Can you do the Picard Maneuver in a Grand Am?
Can you find the mispelled word in hear?
Can you read a punched card, looking at the holes?
Can you repeat the part after "Listen very carefully"?
Can you say "Pervert", I thought you could.
Can you tell I need more tag lines?
Can you whistle 300 baud?
Can you whistle a telephone number?
Can't have everything. Where would you put it ?
Can't have evrything. Where would you put it?
Can't learn to do it well? Learn to enjoy doing it badly
Can't open /usr/lib/fortunes.
Can't wait for MS-DOS 5.01 !
Can't wait for MS-DOS 5.1 !
Can't wait for MS-DOS 7.1 !
Can't wait for them 100Gb, 10ns drives !
Canada Bill Jone's Motto: It's morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money.
Canada Post doesn't really charge 32 cents for a stamp.  It's 2 cents for postage and 30 cents for storage. | Gerald Regan, Cabinet Minister, 12/31/83 Financial Post
Canada has never been a melting pot; more like a tossed salad. Arnold Edinborough
Canada is a country whose main exports are hockey players and cold fronts. Our main imports are baseball players and acid rain. Pierre Trudeau
Canada:   C Eh? N Eh? D Eh?
Canada: a few acres of snow.   | Voltaire
Canadian DOS prompt: EH?\>
Canadian DOS: "Yer sure, eh?" [y/n]
Candy Is dandy But liquor Is quicker. | Ogden Nash
Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker.
Candy is dandy, but liquour is quicker. -- Ogden Nash.
Cannot fork -- try again.
Cannot open /usr/games/lib/fortunes.
Capital punishment is as fundamentally wrong as a cure for crime as charity is wrong as a cure for poverty. Henry Ford
Captain  The UARTs kenna' take these speeds
Captain Penny's Law: You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you Can't Fool Mom.
Captain Someone has snorted all the dilithium crystals.
Captain please, not in front of the Klingons.
Captain's Log, star date 21:34.5.
Captain's Log:  Same stuff.  Different sector.
Captain, I beleive it is time for a colorful metaphor.
Captain, I need to kill someone. ~ Worf
Captain, I protest.  I am NOT a merry man | Worf
Captain, phasers and photons down, get the hand phaser out
Captain, please,  Not in front of the Klingons.
Captain, please.  Not in front of the Klingons.
Captain, the UARTs won't take this Speed
Captain, we have attained ridiculous speed. * Data
Captain, we have engaged dataschlurp mode
Captains Log Stardate 45643.2 - "Got up. Had some tea. Went to bed"
Card-carrying member of the cultural elite.
Career is too pompous a word. It was a job, and I have always felt privileged to be paid for what I love doing. Barbara Stanwyck
Careful planning will never replace dumb luck.
Carelessness does more harm than a want of knowledge.
Caresses, expressions of one sort or another, are necessary to the life of the affections as leaves are to the life of a tree. If they are wholly restrained, love will die at the roots. Nathaniel Hawthorne
Carpe Diem.
Carpe diem, quam minimum credula postero   Horace (8 BC)
Carpenters are just plane folks.
Carry the battle to them. Don't let them bring it to you. Put them on the defensive. And don't ever apologize for anything. Harry S. Truman
Cast thy bread upon the waters: for thou shalt find it after many days. Ecclesiastes 11:1
Castration takes balls.
Cat bathing is a martial art.
Catholic girls, they never confess.
Cats : the proof that eating and sleeping isn't all bad.
Cats are like furry dilettanti, or the reverse?
Cats, proof that eating and sleeping isn't all bad.
Cauliflower is nothing but Cabbage with a College Education. | Mark Twain
Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
Cause of crash: Inadvertent contact with the ground.
Caution:  Blown Brain At Work!
Caution:  Breathing may be hazardous to your health.
Caution:  Contents under pressure
Caution:  Hungry Dieter   May bite if provoked
Caution: PET XING
Caution: This stuff is addictive...
Caution: breathing may be hazardous to your health.
Caveat emptor, no deposit no return, do not remove.
Cavorting about like that isn't proper behavior. | Picard
Celebrate Hannibal Day this year.  Take an elephant to lunch.
Celebrate Hannibal Day today.  Take an elephant to lunch.
Celebrity was a long time in coming; it will go away. Everything goes away. Carol Burnett
Celery farmers play the stalk market.
Celery raw develops a jaw. But stewed, is quietly chewed.
Celibacy is hereditary.
Celibacy is not an inherited characteristic.
Celibacy is not hereditary.
Censor - a man who knows more than he thinks you should.
Censorship is something [[[[[[ [[[[ I do [[[ like
Censorship reflects a society's lack of confidence in itself. Potter Stewart
Census Taker to Housewife: Did you ever have the measles, and, if so, how many?
Cent, 5 cent, 10 cent, dollar.
Center meeting at 4 pm in 2C-543.
Cereal Killer Strikes Again Cap'n Crunch found dead...
Certain brief sentences are peerless in their ability to give one the feeling that nothing remains to be said. Jean Rostand
Certain thoughts are prayers. There are moments when, whatever be the attitude of the body, the soul is on its knees. Victor Hugo
Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny-- 	Did you ever try buying then without money? | Ogden Nash
Certified to serve!
Chance favors the prepared mind. Louis Pasteur
Chance favours the prepared mind.| Louis Pasteur
Chance favours the trained mind. -- Pasteur
Chance fights ever on the side of the prudent. Euripides
Chance makes our parents, but choice makes our friends.
Change of weather is the discourse of fools. Thomas Fuller
Change your thoughts and you change your world.
Chaparral - A men only arral.
Character Density: the number of very weird people in the office.
Character is made by many acts; it may be lost by a single one. Anonymous
Character is much easier kept than recovered.
Character is not made in a crisis - it is only exhibited.
Charity begins at home, and mostly ends where it begins.
Charity begins at home.
Charity:  a thing that begins at home and usually stays there.
Charlie don't surf | Col. Kilgore (Apocalypse Now)
Charlie was a chemist, but Charlie is no more. What Charlie thought was H2O was H2SO4.
Charm is a way of getting a "yes" without having asked any clear question.
Chastity is curable, if detected early.
Chastity is its own punishment.
Cheap is dear in the long run.
Cheap things are of no value, valuable things are not cheap.
Check again to make sure it's not loaded.
Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.
Cheer up, the worst is yet to come. Philander Johnson
Cheerfulness smoothes the road of life.
Chef: A cook who swears in French.
Chemicals, n.: Noxious substances from which modern foods are made.
Chemistry professors never die, they just fail to react.
Chemistry professors never die, they just smell that way
Chemistry professors never die, they just smell that way!
Chemists have nice reactions.
Chemists have solutions.
Chemists never die -- they just stop reacting.
Chemists really know their bismuth.
Cheops' Law:  Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.
Cherish all your happy moments: they make a fine cushion for old age. Booth Tarkington
Cherish all your happy moments; they make a fine cushion for your old age. Christopher Morley
Chernobyl used MACs
Chevrolet, Heartbreak of America.
Chicago, n.: Where the dead still vote ... early and often
Chicken - the egg's way of making more eggs.
Chicken Little only has to be right once.
Chicken Little only has to be right once. Firestone's Law of Forecasting
Chicken Little was right.
Chicken Soup, n.:  An ancient miracle drug containing equal parts of aureomycin, cocaine, interferon, and TLC.  The only ailment chicken soup can't cure is neurotic dependence on one's mother. | Arthur Naiman, "Every Goy's Guide to Yiddish"
Chicken feed is what most of our nest eggs have turned into.
Chicken heads are the chief food of captive alligators.
Chickens are how eggs make more eggs.
Childish game: one at which your spouse beats you.
Children Learn What They Live!
Children are a great comfort in your old age - and they help you reach it faster, too. Lionel Kauffman
Children are a poor man's wealth. Danish Proverb
Children are entitled to their otherness, as anyone is; and when we reach them, as we sometimes do, it is generally on a point of sheer delight, to us so astonishing, but to them so natural. Alastair Reid
Children are innocent and love justice, while most adults are wicked and prefer mercy. Gilbert K. Chesterton
Children are natural mimic who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.
Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners. Anonymous
Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, And that's what parents were created for. Ogden Nash
Children aren't happy without something to ignore, And that's what parents were created for. | Ogden Nash
Children have more need of models than of critics.
Children need love, especially when they don't deserve it.
Children seldom misquote you.  In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.
Children: Pure love contained in soft packages.
Chinese saying: "He who speak with forked tongue, not need chopsticks."
Chipmunks roasting on an open fire.
Chipmunks roasting on an open fire...
Chism's Law of Completion: The amount of time required to complete a government project is precisely equal to the length of time already spent on it.
Chisolm's First Corollary to Murphy's Second Law: When things just can't possibly get any worse, they will.
Choose the life that is most useful, and habit will make it the most agreeable. Francis Bacon
Choose your friends carefully. Your enemies will choose you. Yassir Arafat
Choosy modemers choose GIF
Choosy perverts choose GIF.
Chown up.  Chow down.
Christ died for our sins, so let's not disappoint him.
Christ: A man who was born at least 5,000 years ahead of his time.
Christian: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbors. Ambrose Bierce
Christianity does not remove you from the world and its problems; it makes you fit to live in it, triumphantly and usefully. Charles Templeton
Christianity has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and not tried. Gilbert K. Chesterton
Christianity is a battle, not a dream. Wendell Phillips
Christianity is a missionary religion, converting, advancing, aggressive, encompassing the world; a non-missionary church is in the bands of death. Friedrich Max Mller
Christians do it with grace
Christmas comes, but once a year is enough.
Churchill's Commentary on Man: Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
Cigarette: A fire at one end, a fool at the other, and a bit of tobacco in between.
Cindarella's Godmother was a fairy.
Cinemuck, n.: The combination of popcorn, soda, and melted chocolate which covers the floors of movie theaters. | Rich Hall, "Sniglets"
Circular Definition : see Definition, Circular.
Circular Definition: see Definition, Circular.
Circumstances rule men; men do not rule circumstances.
Cities, like cats, will reveal themselves at night.
Civil servants are neither civil nor servile.
Civilization - biggest syntax error in history!
Civilization is a movement, it is a voyage not a harbor.
Civilization is a race between education and catastrophe.
Civilized society is perpetually menaced with disintegration through this primary hostility of men towards one another ... Sigmund Freud
Claravoiant meeting canceled due to unforseen events.
Clark Kent is a transvestite.
Class I like : public Sex { \
Classical music is the kind that we keep hoping will turn into a tune. Kin Hubbard
Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune. Kin Hubbard
Classified material requires proper storage.
Clean mind or clean body?  Take your pick!
Clean mind, clean body:  take your pick.
Cleanliness is next to "clean-limbed," in the dictionary.
Cleanliness is next to impossible.
Cleanliness is next to impossible.
Cleanliness is... In the bathroom cabinet.
Clear as mud
Cleats | From "101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR"
Cleveland still lives.  God must be dead.
Clever father, clever daughter; clever mother, clever son.
Cleverness is serviceable for everything but sufficient for nothing.
Click..Click..Click..Damn  Out of taglines
Click..Click..Click..darn, out of taglines!
Climate is what you expect.  Weather is what you get.
Climate is what you expect. Weather is what you get.
Clones are people two.
Cloning is the sincerest form of flattery.
Close the door and the light stays on!
Close your eyes and press escape three times.
Closed Captioned in HEX for Programmers.
Closed Hearing for the Caption Impaired...
Closed eyes are not always sleeping.
Closing on ship target.  Music on  Fire away
Clothe with life the weak intent, let me be the thing I meant. John Greenleaf Whittier
Clothes don't make the man, but clothes have got many a man a good job. Herbert Harold Vreeland
Clothes make the man.  Naked people have little or no influence on society. | Mark Twain
Clothes make the man. Latin Proverb
Clothes make the man; naked people have little or no influence on society.
Coastal access, next left.
Cobol programmers are down in the dumps.
Cobol programmers understand why women hate periods.
Cobol programs are an exercise in artificial inelegance.
Cocaine -- the thinking man's Asprin.
Cocaine -- the thinking man's Dristan.
Cocaine isn't what it is cracked up to be.
Coffee in England is just toasted milk.
Coffee not found -- Programmer Halted!
Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum -- "I think that I think, therefore I think that I am." | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Cogito ergo cogito
Cogito ergo spud: I think therefore I yam.
Cogli l'attimo                                                                                                         ogli l'attimo.
Cogli l'attimo                                                                                                         Cogli l'attimo.
Cold pizza:  the generic breakfast
Cold, adj.: When the local flashers are handing out written descriptions.
Cold, adj.: When the politicians walk around with their hands in their own pockets.
Cole's Law: Thinly sliced cabbage.
Cole's Law: Thinly sliced cabbage. Anonymous
Cole's law: thinly sliced cabbage.
Collaboration, n.: A literary partnership based on the false assumption that the other fellow can spell.
Collector: Person few care to see but ask to call again.
College don't make fools : they only develop them.
College: Guarantee the quality of the product or return.
Collision Theory - if you crash, the bigger car will win
Color is only a pigment of your imagination.
Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.
Columbus had a fourth ship - it sailed over the edge.
Colvard's Logical Premises: All probabilities are 50%.  Either a thing will happen or it won't.
Colvard's Unconscionable Commentary: This is especially true when dealing with someone you're attracted to.
Com'on folks, get a life ! It's all just 1s & 0s !
Come back ya pansie! I'll bite yer legs off!
Come in, Beverly, and I'll show you a real Picard maneuver.
Come on down to 292 Chesterville Rd, Moorabbin, and let me, do it right for YOU
Come on, folks, get a life ! It's all just 1s & 0s !
Come, every frustum longs to be a cone, And every vector dreams of matrices. Hark to the gentle gradient of the breeze: It whispers of a more ergodic zone. | Stanislaw Lem, "Cyberiad"
Come, let us hasten to a higher plane, Where dyads tread the fairy fields of Venn, Their indices bedecked from one to n, Commingled in an endless Markov chain | Stanislaw Lem, "Cyberiad"
Comedy is tragedy plus time., Carol Burnett
Coming Real Soon : Mouse Support for Turbo Edlin !
Coming Soon  Mouse Support for Edlin
Coming Soon!!  Mouse Support for Edlin!!
Coming Soon. Mouse Support for Turbo Edlin
Coming Soon. Mouse Support for Turbo Edlin !
Coming Soon... Turbo Edlin
Coming real soon : mouse support for Turbo Edlin !
Coming soon from Microsoft Foods: Animal Hackers !
Coming soon: Netware for Nintendo
Coming soon: Netware for the Nintendo!
Coming to a TV soon, "Days of Our Modems"
Coming to this tagline soon, a NEW HAM call sign
Command - used to instruct computers. Usually elicits the response "Syntax error".
Command, n.: Statement presented by a human and accepted by a computer in such a manner as to make the human feel as if he is in control.
Commander Data just installed doublespace, Now he remembers twice as much.
Comment is free but facts are sacred. Charles P. Scott
Commercial radio, commercial radio, commercial r
Commit the oldest sins the newest kind of ways.
Commitment, n.: Commitment can be illustrated by a breakfast of ham and eggs. The chicken was involved, the pig was committed.
Committee : a group which keeps minutes and waste hours.
Committee: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
Common Sense Isn't So Common.
Common malady: Diarrhea of mouth + constipation of brain
Common sense and nature will do a lot to make the pilgrimage of life not too difficult. W. Somerset Maugham
Common sense is compelled to make its way without the enthusiasm of anyone. Ed Howe
Common sense is genius in homespun. Alfred North Whitehead
Common sense is in spite of, not as the result of education. Victor Hugo
Common sense is instinct, and enough of it is genius.
Common sense is instinct, and enough of it is genius. Josh Billings
Common sense is only a modification of talent. Genius is an exaltation of it. The difference is, theherefore, in degree, not nature. Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton
Common sense is perhaps th most equally divided, but surely the most underemployed, talent in the world. Christiane Collage
Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.| Albert Einstein
Common sense is the knack of seeing things as they are, and doing things as they ought to be done. Josh Billings
Common sense is the least common of all senses.
Common sense is the uncommonest sense of all...
Common sense is very uncommon.
Common sense is very uncommon. Horace Greeley
Common sense is what tls us the Earth is flat and the Sun goes around it. Anon
Common sense isn't.
Commonplace minds usually condemn what is beyond the reach of their understanding. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Communication.. without it, everyone's a mushroom.
Communism is like a mouth on a lollipop
Communism is like one big phone company.
Communism: What's not illegal, is compulsory.
Comp Scis have bigger hard disks.
Compassion is the basis of all morality.
Compassion is the only one of the human emotions the Lord permitted Himself and it has carried the divine flavor ever since. Dagobert D. Runes
Competence always contains the seeds of incompetence.
Competition is the keen cutting edge of business, always shaving away at costs. Henry Ford II
Compile, run, curse. Recompile, rerun, recurse.
Compiling... Linking... Dialing Copyright Lawyer...
Complain to one who can help you. Yugoslav Proverb
Complaints? Write them here legibly [] <-
Complete abstinence is easier than perfect moderation. Saint Augustine
Complete adaptation to environment means death. The essential point in all response is the desire to control environment. John Dewey
Complex problems have simple, easy to understand wrong answers.
Complex problems have simple, easy to understand wrong answers. Grossman's Law
Compliments of the Itty Bitty Machine Company.
Composers should write tunes that chauffeurs and errand boys can whistle. Thomas Beecham
Compress - Female of Comperor.
Compression ain't over 'til the FAT table sings
Computational Physicist and all around nice guy.
Computer (com-pyoo-ter) n.-Incredibly fast idiot!
Computer Engineers do it bit by bit.
Computer Lie #1: You'll never use all that disk space.
Computer Marketing & Consults--Stay Clear!!
Computer Science is merely the post-Turing decline in formal systems theory.
Computer actors will never be great; they only get bit parts
Computer engineers do it bit by bit.
Computer programmers do it byte by byte
Computer programmers never die, they just get lost in the processing.
Computer users take more strokes.
Computer widow : Family goes broke watching Dad have fun.
Computer, microwave decks 5-10 until piping hot.  BEEP
Computer, microwave decks 5-10 until piping hot.  BEEP!
Computer: a million morons working at the speed of light.
Computers ARE the future. Oh the future looks grim
Computers All Wait at the Same Speed!
Computers Personally, I rather look forward to a computer program winning the world chess championship. Humanity needs a lesson in humility. Richard Dawkins
Computers also eliminate spare time.
Computers are OUR business, our ONLY business
Computers are not intelligent.  They only think they are.
Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are
Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.
Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are. Anonymous
Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable.
Computers are useless; they can only give answers.
Computers can never replace human stupidity.
Computers don't make mistakes, but foolish people do.
Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
Computers run on faith, not electrons.
Computers unite you have nothing to lose but your operators.
Computers:  the financial black hole of the 90's
Comrades, this man has a nice smile, but he's got iron teeth. Andrei Gromyko
Con 'sta pioggia e con 'sto vento chi e' che bossa a 'sto convento?
Con 'sta pioggia e con 'sto vento chi e' che bssa a 'sto convento?
ConEd - made in the U.S.A
Conceit causes more conversation than wit. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Conceit causes more conversation than wit. | LaRouchefoucauld
Conceit is a pain killer for stupidity.....
Concentrate on security.
Concentration is the secret of strength. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Concept, n.: Any "idea" for which an outside consultant billed you more than $25,000.
Conclusion : the place where you got tired of thinking.
Condense soup, not books
Condense soup, not books!
Condense soup, not books! Conscious is when you are aware of something, and conscience is when you wish you weren't. Anonymous
Conditional jumps is when you tell the computer to go to a certain place. Unconditional is if you put it in the wrong place so the computer goes to the wrong place.
Condom - external storage
Condominiums are not effective birth control.
Condoning sloppy spelling is guache.
Conference Host, Running & Being
Conference, U. of Colorado 1993) We love to expect, and when expectation is either disappointed or gratified, we want to be again expecting. Samuel Johnson
Confess your sins to the Lord, and you will be forgiven; confess them to men, and you will be laughed at. Josh Billings
Confessed faults are half mended. Scottish Proverb
Confession is good 4 the soul, but bad 4 the reputation.
Confession is good for the soul only in the sense that a tweed coat is good for dandruff. | Peter de Vries
Confession is good for the soul, but bad for your career.
Confidence is telling someone how to use his Twit Filter.
Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation.
Confirmation of the past is often the greatest surprise.
Conform and be dull. J. Frank Doble
Conformity obstructs progress.
Confucious say too damn much!
Confucious say: "I have no time for monks resisting the carnival"
Confucious say: I didn't say that!
Confucious say: Man who meows ate pussy!
Confucious say: Man who stand on toilet is high on Pot.
Confucious say: Man with no legs bums around.
Confucious say: Those who quote me are fools.
Confucius say too much.
Confucius say, Don't quote me with stupid accent.
Confucius say: "I have no time for monks resisting the carnival"
Confuse People:  Quote from the wrong message!
Confuse people - quote from the wrong.
Confuse people: start making sense.
Confused? Call Lt.Cmdr.Troi at 1-800-NCC-1701($1.95/min:5 minute min)
Confusion is always increasing in society.
Confusion not only reigns, it pours.
Confussion will be my epitaph
Confusticate and bebother these dwarves
Confusticate and bebother these dwarves!
Congratulations  The pressure will stop soon.
Congratulations  You are the 16,777,216th user to login to our system.
Congratulations  You are the one-millionth user to log into our system.
Congratulations  You have now used up another 250 hours of CPU time.
Congratulations Data, it's a girl.  Troy - The Offsprin
Congratulations!  The pressure will stop soon.
Congratulations!  You are the 16,777,216th user to login to our system.
Congratulations!  You are the one-millionth user to log into our system.
Congratulations!  You got the first fortune!
Congratulations!  You have now used up another 250 hours of CPU time.
Congress is so strange. A man gets up to speak and says nothing. Nobody listensand then everybody disagrees. Boris Marshalov
Conjecture as to things useful, is good; but conjecture as to what it would be useless to know, is very idle. Samuel Johnson
Conscience and cowardice are really the same things. Oscar Wilde
Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends. H. L. Mencken
Conscience is the inner voice that warns us somebody is looking | H. L. Mencken
Conscience is the mirror of our souls, which represents the errors of our lives in their full shape. George Bancroft
Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels so good.
Consciencethe only incorruptible thing about us. Henry Fielding
Consciously or unconsciously, every one of us does render some service or other. If we cultivate the habit of doing this service deliberately, our desire for service will steadily grow stronger, and will make, not only our own happiness, but that of the world at large. Gandhi
Conservation is ethically sound. It is rooted in our love of the land, our respect for the rights of others, our devotion to the rule of law. Lyndon Baines Johnson
Conservation means the wise use of the earth and its resources for the lasting good of men. Gifford Pinchot
Conservatism is the worship of dead revolutions.
Conservative: A Liberal who's been mugged.
Consider the postage stamp, my son. It secures success through its ability to stick to one thing till it gets there. Josh Billings
Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there. Josh Billings
Consider your reputation.  Try changing your name and moving to a new town.
Consistency : The last refuge of the unimaginative.
Consistency is the hobgoblin of small minds.
Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative.
Consistency: The last refuge of the unimaginative
Consolations, Consultations, Conflagrations.
Conspiracy to conceal information by leaving it mislabeled in plain sight dooms billions to lifelong servitude under soul-vampire pseudo-deities created by the ones they enslave!
Conspiracy: the opiate of the asses
Constancy is the complement of all other human virtues. Giuseppe Mazzini
Constant change is here to stay.
Constant success shows us but one side of the world; adversity brings out the reverse of the picture. Charles Caleb Colton
Constant tinkering buggers things up
Constants aren't. Variables don't.
Consult a real expert - Call your mother
Consult your friend on all things, especially on those which respect yourself. His counsel may then be useful where your own self-love might impair your judgment. Seneca
Consultancy - The art of extracting money from another man's pocket without resorting to violence.
Consultants are mystical people who ask a company for a number and then give it back to them.
Contact with a friend may provide some unexpected income advantages.
Contacts Plus... The adventure continues.
Contains less than 2% U.S. RDA for this echo
Contemporaries appreciate the man rather than his merit; posterity will regard the merit rather than the man. Charles Caleb Colton
Content is health to the sick and riches to the poor.
Contentment comes of the heart, not of the house.
Contentment is a pearl of great price, and whoever procures it at the expense of ten thousand desires makes a wise and a happy purchase. John Balguy
Contentment is natural wealth, luxury is artificial poverty. Socrates
Contentment is, after all, simply refined indolence. Thomas C. Haliburton
Contents may have settled out of court.
Contentsoftaglinemaysettleduringshipping.
Continental Life. Why do you ask?
Contraceptives: to be used on all conceivable occasions.
Control-Alt-Delete Thyself.
Control-Alt-Delete thyself
Convention is the ruler of all.
Conversation enriches the understanding, but solitude is the school of genius.
Conversation is an art in which man has all mankind for competitors. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Conversation should be pleasant without scurrility, witty without affectation, free without indecency, learned without conceitedness, novel without falsehood. William Shakespeare
Conversation would be vastly improved by the constant use of four simple words: I do not know. Andr Maurois
Conversation, n.: A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath is called the listener.
Converse with any plankton lately?
Convictions are more dangerous foes of truth than lies. Friedrich Nietzsche
Convince others to seek your approval and withhold it until they weep.
Conway's Law: In any organization there will always be one person who knows what is going on. This person must be fired.
Cooperation is doing with a smile that which you have to do anyway.
Copy from another: plagiarism. Copy from many: research.
Copyright the Intergalactic Thought Association
Copywight 1991 Elmer Fudd.  All wights wesewved
Core Error -- Bus Dumped.
Coronation, n.: The ceremony of investing a sovereign with the outward and visible signs of his divine right to be blown skyhigh with a dynamite bomb. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Correct in Thought, Statement, or Action....TRUE!!
Corrupt Data - a copy of Mac Playmate.
Corrupt, adj.: In politics, holding an office of trust or profit.
Corruption is not the #1 priority of the Police Commissioner. His job is to enforce the law and fight crime. | P.B.A. President E. J. Kiernan
Could be an ever-opening flower.
Could crop circles be the work of a cereal killer?
Could you be a little more vague, counselor?
Could you state that as a question, please?
Couldn't myself have better it said.
Counselor, can I, uh, use your com-badge?  Riker
Count Dracula - your Bloody Mary is ready...
Counting in binary is just like counting in decimal if you are all thumbs.
Counting in binary is just like counting in decimal, if you are all thumbs.
Counting in octal is just like counting in decimal if you don't use your thumbs
Coup de grace -- French for lawnmower?
Courage is fear that has said its prayers.
Courage is fear that said its prayers.
Courage is grace under pressure.
Courage is the price that life exacts for granting peace. The soul that knows it bot, knows no release from little things; knows not the livid loneliness of fear. Amelia Earhart
Courage is your greatest present fault.
Courage is your greatest present need.
Courtesy distinguishes humans from animals.
Courtesy on one side can never last long.
Courtship consists in a number of quiet attentions, not so pointed as to alarm, nor so vague as not to be understood. Laurence Sterne
Cover your stump before you hump.
Cow's breath attracts mosquitoes and tsetse flies!
Coward, n.: One who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Craft must have clothes, but truth loves to go naked. Thomas Fuller
Cranial Input Error: Line Status Register 02
Crash programs fail because they are based on the theory that, with nine women pregnant, you can get a baby a month. | Wernher von Braun
Crazee Edeee, his prices are INSANE
Crazee Edeee, his prices are INSANE!!!
Cream rises to the top... but then so does scum.
Create the impression that you have already reached your level of incompetence.
Create your own opportunity.  Blackmail a senior executive.
Creation is a drug I can't do without. Cecil B. DeMille
Creative semantics is the key to contemporary government; it consists of talking in strange tongues lest the public learn the inevitable inconveniently early. George Will
Creatures whose mainspring is curiosity enjoy the accumulating of facts far more than the pausing at times to reflect on those facts. Clarence Day
Credit card owner -- Member of the debt set.
Credit is like a looking-glass, which when once sullied by a breath, may be wiped clear again; but if once cracked can never be repaired. Walter Scott
Creditor: A man who has a longer memory than a debtor.
Creditors have better memories than debtors.
Creditors have better memories than debtors. Benjamin Franklin
Creditors have better memories than debtors. Proverb
Creditors have much better memories than debtors.
Credulity is belief in slight evidence, with no evidence, or against evidence. Tryon Edwards
Crewman Green, step on that rock  <BOOM>
Crime and punishment grow out of one stem. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Crime does not pay ... as well as politics. | A. E. Newman
Crime does not pay ... as well as politics.| A. E. Newman
Crime does not pay... as well as politics.
Crime doesn't pay... does that mean my job is a crime?
Crime is a product of social excess. Lenin, Vladimir
Crime is contagious. If the government becomes a lawbreaker, it breeds contempt for law. Louis D. Brandeis
Crime wouldn't pay if it was run by the Government
Crime wouldn't pay if the Government ran it
Crime wouldn't pay if the government ran it.
Criminal: One who gets caught.
Criminals do not die by the hands of the law; they die by the hands of other men. George Bernard Shaw
Crises and deadlocks when they occur have at least this advantage, that they force us to think. Jawaharlal Nehru
Crises bring out the best in the best of us, and the worst in the worst of us. Anonymous
Crises refine life. In them you discover what you are. Allan K. Chalmers
Critic, n.: A person who boasts himself hard to please because nobody tries to please him. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Critical error: (S)hout, (S)mash, (B)uy a mac.
Criticism comes easier than craftsmanship.
Criticism, as it was first instituted by Aristotle, was meant as a standard of judging well. Samuel Johnson
Crito, I owe a cock to Asclepius; will you remember to pay the debt?
Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country. Stephen Wright
Cruelty Cruelty, like every other vice, requires no motive outside of itself; it only requires opportunity. George Eliot
Cruelty and fear shake hands together. Honor de Balzac
Cruelty is a part of nature, at least of human nature, but it is the one thing that seems unnatural to us. Robinson Jeffers
Crusher: Worf, have you seen Wesley?   Worf: No, I haven't
Crusoe got everything done by Friday. Can you ?
Crystal balls aren't really very productive.
Cthulhu Calls -- using MCI
Cthulu Saves... in case he's hungry later!
Ctrl-Alt-Del to read the next message.
Cuando amor no es locura, no es amor. (When love is not madness, it is not love.) Spanish Proverb
Cultivate happiness and it becomes a habit.
Cultivate only the habits that you are willing should master you. Elbert Hubbard
Culture is one thing and varnish is another. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Culture is the habit of being pleased with the best and knowing why.
Culture is the habit of being pleased with the best and knowing why. Henry Van Dyke
Culture is the widening of the mind and of the spirit. Jawaharlal Nehru
Culture of the mind must be subservient to the heart. Mahatma Gandhi
Culture, with us, ends in headache. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Cunnilingus is a real tongue twister!
Cure for baldness: Put on your hat!
Cure the disease and kill the patient.
Curiosity didn't kill the cat, I got him with the mower!
Curiosity didn't kill the cat. I got 'im with the mower
Curiosity is as much the parent of attention, as attention is of memory. Richard Whately
Curiosity is only vanity. Most frequently we wish not to know, but to talk. We would not take a sea voyage for the sole pleasure of seeing without hope of ever telling. Blaise Pascal
Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought her back.
Curiosity kills more mice than cats.
Curious how naked death is less obscene than naked women.
Currency | From "101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR"
Cursor - small blob on the screen, usually flashing.
Curst greed of gold, what crimes thy tyrant power has caused. Vergil
Custom governs the world; it is the tyrant of our feelings and our manners and rules the world with the hand of a despot. J. Bartlett
Custom has furnished the only basis which ethics have ever had. Joseph Wood Krutch
Custom is the law of fools.
Custom is the plague of wise men and the idol of fools. Thomas Fuller
Custom is the principle magistrate of man's life. Francis Bacon
Custom meets us at the cradle and leaves us only at the tomb. Robert Green Ingersoll
Cut life support to all quarters with children | Picard
Cut life support to all quarters with children. * Picard
Cut my pizza in six slices, please; I can't eat eight.
Cut my pizza into six pieces please. I can't eat eight.
Cut quarrels out of literature, and you will have very little history or drama or fiction or epic poetry left. Robert Lynd
Cut your coat according to your cloth.
Cutting remarks don't cut any ice.
Cwm fjord-bank glyphs vext quiz.
Cynic, n. a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be. - Ambrose Bierce
Cynic, n.: A blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.  Hence the custom among the Scythians of plucking out a cynic's eyes to improve his vision. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Cynic, n.: One who looks through rose-colored glasses with a jaundiced eye.
Cynicism is but idealism gone sour in the face of frustration.
Cynicism is intellectual dandyism.
D.O.S. - program designed to make an even flow of dust round the disk.
DAM: Mothers Against Dyslexia.
DAMN IT, I GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE
DAMN IT, I GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE!
DANGER ! DANGER ! Computer Book Store Ahead, Hide Wallet.
DANGER ! DANGER ! Computer Store Ahead, Hide Wallet.
DANGER! DANGER! Computer Book Store Ahead, Hide Wallet.
DANGER! DANGER! Computer Store Ahead, Hide Wallet.
DANGER! Human at keyboard!
DATA COMPRESSION: What You Get When You Squish An Android
DATA COMPRESSION: What you get when you squish an android.
DAVIS' ANSWER TO ROGER'S LAW: Serving coffee on an aircraft causes turbulence.
DAY: n, A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. Ambrose Bierce
DBasers do it in fields.
DCE seeks DTE for mutual exchange of data.
DEAL'S SAILING LAW: the amount of wind varies inversely with the number and experience of the crew.
DEBUG - Takes bugs off the windshield with minimum fuss.
DEFINE: De ting you get for breaking de law.
DEFINITION: Address - Type of attire worn by some female programmers.
DEFINITION: Altair - A place where computers are sacrificed.
DEFINITION: Array - A blast from a CRT.
DEFINITION: BASIC- Beginner's All-purpose Sloppy Instruction Code.
DEFINITION: Backup - Opposite of forward.
DEFINITION: Branch - A stick used for beating.
DEFINITION: Buffer - A programmer who works in the nude.
DEFINITION: COBOL- Confused Oriental Bean-cOunting Language.
DEFINITION: Coding - An addictive drug.
DEFINITION: Computer - A device designed to speed and automate errors.
DEFINITION: Core Storage - A receptacle for the center section of apples.
DEFINITION: Cpu - C3po's mother.
DEFINITION: Dip - Inventor of a famous switch.
DEFINITION: Disassembler - An unattended five year old child.
DEFINITION: Disk Drive - A motor for a frisbee.
DEFINITION: External Storage - A wastebasket.
DEFINITION: FORTRAN- Formless Translations.
DEFINITION: Forth - One of the top five computer languages.
DEFINITION: GiGo - Garbage in garbage out.
DEFINITION: Initialize - Carving your initials on a floppy disk.
DEFINITION: Input - Food, beverages, painkillers, stimulants, etc.
DEFINITION: Iterate- A healthy illiterate.
DEFINITION: Joystick- A peripheral intended for use only by consenting adults.
DEFINITION: Language- A system of organizing and defining syntax errors.
DEFINITION: Macro - The last half of an expression of surprise: "Holy Macro".
DEFINITION: Math Chip- A piece of a broken abacus.
DEFINITION: Megabyte- A nine course dinner.
DEFINITION: Memory Map - A sheet of paper showing location of computer store.
DEFINITION: Mhz- Acronym for 'Megahurtz', meaning 'a million pains'.
DEFINITION: Microfiche - Sardines.
DEFINITION: Password- The nonsense word taped to the CRT.
DEFINITION: Upgrade - Take old bugs out, put new ones in.
DELETE A FORTUNE Don't some of these fortunes just drive you nuts? Wouldn't you like to see some of them deleted from the system? You can  Just mail to "fortune" with the fortune you hate most, and we MIGHT make sure it gets expunged.
DELIBERATION: n, The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on. Ambrose Bierce
DEMOCRACY, n: The recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half the time. E. B. White
DESQview - No hourglass required !
DESQview does Windoze.
DESQview:  Windex for Windows
DESQview: Better windows
DESQview: Faster than a Cray (running Windows)
DESQview: The Faster Multitasker
DESTINY: n, A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure. Ambrose Bierce
DEVICE=EXXON.SYS may mess up your environment
DEVICEHIGH:  Your device driver on drugs.
DEVRIES' DILEMMA: If you hit two keys on the typewriter, the one you don't want will hit the paper.
DILATE: To live longer.
DINER'S DILEMMA: A clean tie attracts the soup of the day.
DIODE: What happens to people who don't die young.
DISASSEMBLER: An unattended five year old child.
DISK ERROR: Please remove pizza from A:
DISREGARD LAST MESSAGE
DIVORCE =system("echo y| erase \wife\*.*" );
DO NOT ADJUST YOUR MIND - the fault is with reality
DO NOT REMOVE THIS TAG (UNDER PENALTY OF LAW)
DO NOT soak me up with honey please!
DON'T READ THIS !!!
DON'T STEAL - The government hates competition.
DON'T read the manual! Just WING that sucker!
DON'T throw away your 2 words.  I collect them!
DONTREADTHISUNLESSYOUWANTTOWEARGLASSESOK
DOS + Windows + ATM < OS/2 2.0
DOS 6.0  Yesterday's operating system, today!
DOS ERROR: Please remove cat from drive A:
DOS Tip : Don't use DOS.
DOS is just an operating system that runs Windows 3.0
DOS is just an operating system that runs Windows 3.1
DOS is the greatest computer virus ever written| UNIX user
DOS is todays CP/M - Windows is tomorrows CP/M
DOS means never having to live hand-to-mouse
DOS means never having to live hand-to-mouse.
DOS never says "EXCELLENT command or filename"...
DOS never says "Excellent command or filename..."
DOS-O-MANIA : Reboot is not kicking your computer again
DOS-O-MANIA : Root is not the book Alex Haley wrote.
DOS:  Tells a computer what to do with itself
DOS:  Tells a computer what to do with itself!
DOS=HIGH? I knew it was on something...
DOWN WITH EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!!
DOYLE'S LAW: No matter how many share a cab, each puts the full fare on their expense account.
DS9:  To boldly stay put where no one has stayed put before.
DSZ speed 300 ha ha ha tee hee hee rz -ZZZZZZ
DUCHARME'S PRECEPT: Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.
DYKSTRA'S LAW: Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
Dachshund: Half a dog high by a dog and a half long.
Daddy! Let me push a-!@# NO CARRIER
Daddy, what does "FORMATTING DRIVE C:....." mean ?
Daddy, what does FORMATTING DRIVE C: mean?
Daddy, what does RESET mean
Daddy, why doesn't this magnet pick up this disk?
Daddy?  What's this little red button for?
Dafynition #287:  TSR=Trash System Randomly
Dain Bramaged.
Daisies of the world unite You have nothing to lose but your chains.
Dammit Bones, I'm a captain, not a doctor
Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not a tagline writer.
Dammit no !  Don't pick on the pho^$ L%#!
Dammit, Jim, I'm a floor wax, not a dessert topping
Dammit, where'd I leave that tagline?
Damn It Jim  I'm a Doctor not a Tagline writer
Damn Outta Antimatter. I told Geordi $50 wasn't enough
Damn all expurgated books; the dirtiest book of all is the expurgated book. Walt Whitman
Damn it Jim, I'm a doctor not a doctor Hey, wait a minute
Damn this hobby is expensive
Damned if I do.  Damned if I don't.  Damn it, I will!
Dan Quayle's library burned...both books destroyed.
Dancing with Wolves, Sleeping with beavers
Dancing with a grass widow brings on hay fever.
Danger ! Human at keyboard !
Dangerous Exercise : Jumping to Conclusions.
Dare to be naive. Buckminster Fuller
Daring ideas are like chessmen moved forward. They may be beaten, but they may start a winning game. Goethe
Darkness can not drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Darkness within darkness. The gateway to all understanding. Tao te Ching
Darmok and Jhilad at Tanagra
Darn my hn i s ns
Darth Vadar  Only you would be so bold.
Darth Vadar!  Only you would be so bold.
Darth Vadar! Only you would be so bold.
Darth Vader sleeps with a Teddywookie.
Darth Vader sleeps with a teddywookie.
Data becomes vilently ill with a computer virus.
Data convinces the Coke machine that Pepsi is better.
Data convinces the Pepsi machine that Coke is better!
Data enjoys a smoke after interfacing with the Computer.
Data was very angry with me after I lost his emotion chip.
Data, data everywhere, and not a byte to eat
Data- "It IS the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man, Captain"
Database administrators do it with their relations
Dawn, n.: The time when men of reason go to bed. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Dawn: the time when men of reason go to bed.
Dawson's First Law: You don't have enough outlets.
Day of inquiry.  You will be subpoenaed.
De-accession euphemisms.
DeVries's Dilemma: If you hit two keys on the typewriter, the one you don't want hits the paper.
Dead Cardassians tell no tales.
Dead cat brush | From "101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR"
Dead, huh?  Well, that's one less thing. | Beverly
Deadlines amuse me.
Deadwood. Nineteenth Century Earth. The Ancient West.
Deaf, dumb, and blonde.
Dealing with failure is easy: work hard to improve. Success is also easy to handle: you've solved the wrong problem. Work hard to improve.
Deanna tries to read Picard's mind and sees Pontiac.
Deanna tries to read my mind and sees taglines.
Dear Miss Manners: My home economics teacher says that one must never place one's elbows on the table.  However, I have read that one elbow, in between courses, is all right.  Which is correct?
Dear Miss Manners: Please list some tactful ways of removing a man's saliva from your face.
Death : to stop sinning suddenly.
Death MAY ease tension, researchers report.
Death and taxes are inevitable. Thomas C. Haliburton
Death can be fatal!
Death comes equally to us all, and makes us all equal when it comes. John Donne
Death comes to all But great achievements build a monument Which shall endure until the sun grows cold. Georg Fabricius
Death cures cancer.
Death doesn't pay debts.
Death has been proven to be 99 per cent fatal in laboratory rats.
Death is 99 per cent fatal to laboratory rats.
Death is God's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy.
Death is Nature's way of recycling human beings.
Death is Nature's way of saying 'slow down'.
Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it. W. Somerset Maugham
Death is a very dull, dreary affair, and my advice to you is to have nothing whatsoever to do with it. W. Somerset Maugham, author
Death is an unfortunate side effect of attacking a cop!
Death is life's answer to the question 'Why?'
Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.
Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired. | R. Geis
Death is more universal than life; everyone dies but not everyone lives. A. Sachs
Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
Death is proven to be 99.9% fatal to all laboratory rats.
Death is the greatest kick of all. That's why they save it for last.
Death will be a great relief. No more interviews. Katherine Hepburn
Death:	to stop sinning suddenly.
Death: The unfortunate side effect of attacking a cop.
Death: To stop sinning suddenly.
Deaththe last sleep? No, it is the final awakening. Walter Scott
Debate Conf's=Mud Wrestling for the Pedantic
Debate, rebate, probate - what's the diff??
Debt is a prolific mother of folly and of crime. Benjamin Disraeli
Debt is the fatal disease of republics, the first thing and the mightiest to undermine governments and corrupt the people. Wendell Phillips
Debt is the slavery of the free. Publilius Syrus
Debt is the worst poverty. Thomas Fuller
Debug: De ting killed wid de pressure spray.
Debugger - de bloke dat sold us dis system.
Decay, inherent in all component things. Buddha-last wrds
Deceive the rich and powerful if you will, but don't insult them. Japanese Proverb
Decency is the least of all laws, but yet it is the law which is most strictly observed. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Decide promptly, but never give your reasons. Your decisions may be right, but your reasons are sure to be wrong. Lord Mansfield
Decisionmaker, n.: The person in your office who was unable to form a task force before the music stopped.
Decisions terminate panic.
Decouple - De man and him missus.
Deeds are males and words are females, but not with Bajorans.
Deeds, not stones, are the true monuments of the great. John L. Motley
Deep Space Nine:  The Third Coming of Star Trek
Deep down, you don't understand me.
Defeat is a school in which truth always grows strong. Henry Ward Beecher
Defeat is not the worst of failures. Not to have tried is the true failure. George E. Woodberry
Defeat never comes to any man until he admits it. Josephus Daniels
Defeat should never be a source of courage, but rather a fresh stimulant. Robert South
Defenders only... prosecutors will be violated.
Definition of Terror: A female Klingon with PMS.
Definition: pumpkin (v.): What people in Kentucky do.
Deflector shields just came on, Captain.
Degeneracy follows every autocratic system of violence, for violence inevitably attracts moral inferiors. Time has proven that illustrious tyrants are succeeded by scoundrels. Albert Einstein
Delay is the deadliest form of denial.
Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one's bread to determine which side it is buttered on. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Deliver me from writers who say the way they live doesn't matter. I'm not sure a bad person can write a good book, If art doesn't make us better, then what on earth is it for. Alice Walker
Deliver yesterday, code today, think tomorrow.
Delivered by Electronic Sled-Dogs.....Woof!
Democracy ... is a system of self-determination. It's the right to make the wrong choice. John Patrick
Democracy is a form of government in which it is permitted to wonder aloud what the country could do under first-class management. | Senator Soaper
Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few. George bernard Shaw
Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few. | G. B. Shaw
Democracy is also a form of worship. It is the worship of Jackals by Jackasses. | H. L. Mencken
Democracy is based on the theorem that many men are smarter than one.
Democracy is based upon the conviction that there are extraordinary possibilities in ordinary people. Harry Emerson Fosdick
Democracy is good. I say this because other systems are worse. Jawaharlal Nehru
Democracy is mob rule, but with income taxes. Anonymous
Democracy is only a dream: it should be put in the same category as Arcadia, Santa Claus, and Heaven. H. L. Mencken
Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage. H. L. Mencken
Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage. H.L. Mencken
Democracy is the form of government that gives every man the right to be his own oppressor. James Russell Lowell
Democracy is the government of the people, by the people, for the people. Abraham Lincoln
Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time.
Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time. E.B. White
Democracy is the recurrent suspicion that more than half of the people are right more than half of the time. | E. B. White
Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want and deserve to get it good and hard. H.L. Mencken
Democracy, I do not conceive that ever God did ordain as a fit government either for church or commonwealth. If the people be governors, who shall be governed? John Cotton
Democracy: Four wolves and a lamb voting on lunch.
Democrats Call for Amnesty, Reduced Sentences Likely.
Democrats cut red tape... LENGTHWISE.
Demons are a ghouls best friend.
Dentist : he lives from hand to mouth.
Dentist, n.: A Prestidigitator who, putting metal in one's mouth, pulls coins out of one's pockets. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Depart in pieces.... i.e., Split.
Department meeting in 3 minutes
Department meeting in 3 minutes.
Depend not on fortune, but on conduct.
Depend on no man, on no friend but him who can depend on himself. He only who acts conscientiously toward himself, will act so toward others. Johann Kaspar Lavater
Depression is merely anger without the enthusiasm.
Deprive a mirror of its silver and even the Czar won't see his face.
Design flaws travel in groups. Fifth Law of Design
Desire is the essence of a man. Benedict Spinoza
Despair is like forward children, who, when you take away one of their playthings, throw the rest into the fire for madness. It grows angry with itself, turns its own executioner, and revenges its misfortunes on its own head. Pierre Charron
Despair is the conclusion of fools. Benjamin Disraeli
Despair ruins some, presumption many. Benjamin Franklin
Despair: an extra tire in de trunk.
Desperation is sometimes as powerful an inspirer as genius. Benjamin Disraeli
Despite of the cost of living, it remains popular.
Despite the cost of living, it remains popular.
Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular.
DesqView's Upgrade Policy is good.... NOT!
Dessert? I'll take a piece of cherry c.
Destiny is no matter of chance. It is a matter of choice: It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.
Destiny is no matter of chance. It is a matter of choice: It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved. William Jennings Bryan
Destiny is no matter of chance. It is a matter of choice: It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved., William Jennings Bryan
Destiny. A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure. Ambrose Bierce
Detach the saucer, Data.  Don't spill the tea
Details 20 minutes from now on Action Central News, kids.
Detour: The roughest distance between two points.
Dew is the tears which the stars weep.
Diagnostics can best be understood in the context of the source code.
Diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
Diarrhea is hereditary.    It runs in your jeans.
Dictator - a potato with a penis.
Did I just step on someones toes again?
Did Qmodem originate in the Q continium?
Did Qmodem originate in the Q continuum?
Did Tarzan love Cheetah or Jane? - Pictures at 11.
Did you expect mere proof to sway my opinion?
Did you know ... That no-one ever reads these things?
Did you know that SATAN is an anagram for SANTA?
Did you know that clones never use mirrors?
Did you know that clones never use mirrors? | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Did you know that no-one ever reads these things?
Did you know that rats can't vomit?
Did you receive a proper socialist education ?
Didn't see it, don't have the T-shirt. --M. Hahn
Die Entropie des Welts strebt einem Maximum zu.
Die Jesu domine, Dona eis requiem." <bang>
Die, v.: To stop sinning suddenly. | Elbert Hubbard
Diets are for people who are thick and tired of it.
Diets are for those who are thick and tired of it.
Difference between a hero and a coward is one step sidewa
Difference between a house and a home - a family.
Difference between a virus & windows ? Viruses never fail.
Difference between a virus & windows?  Viruses actually get something done.
Difference between a virus & windows? Viruses never fail.
Difference between a virus and Windows 3.x ? Viruses never fail.
Difference between men & boys is the price of their toys
Difference between men and boys ? The price of their toys.
Difference between tax avoiding and evasion is 10 Years.
Different all twisty a of in maze are you, passages little.
Difficult solutions to easy problems are in the minds of Computer Programmers.
Difficult? I wish it had been impossible!
Difficulties are meant to rouse, not discourage. The human spirit is to grow strong by conflict. William Ellery Channing
Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body. Seneca
Difficulty is the excuse history never accepts.
Digital circuits are made from analog parts.
Dignity belongs to the conquered. Kenneth Burke
Dignity consists not in possessing honors, but in the consciousness that we deserve them. Aristotle
Dignity is a mask we wear to hide our ignorance. Elbert Hubbard
Dijon Vu: the feeling you've tasted this mustard before.
Diligence is the mother of good luck. Benjamin Franklin
Dime:  a dollar with all the taxes taken out.
Dimensions will always be expressed in the least usable term. Velocity, for example, will be expressed in furlongs per fortnight.
Din't mean to?! You put your sword right thru his head!
Dinner not ready : (A)bort, (R)etry, (P)izza ?
Dinner not ready, (A)bort (R)etry (C)all out for Pizza?
Diogenes is still searching.
Diplomacy - the art of letting someone have your way.
Diplomacy : Saying Nice doggie until you can find a rock.
Diplomacy is a disguised war, in which states seek to gain by barter and intrigue, by the cleverness of arts, the objectives which they would have to gain more clumsily by means of war. Randolph Bourne
Diplomacy is saying "nice doggy" until you find a rock.
Diplomacy is the art of letting someone else have your way.
Diplomacy is the art of letting someone have your way. Daniele Vare
Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a club.
Diplomacy is to do and say the nastiest things in the nicest way. Isaac Goldberg
Diplomacy: Saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock
Diplomacy: The art of saying "nice doggie" until you can find a rock.
Diplomacy: The patriotic art of lying for one's country.
Diplomacy: lying in state. Oliver Herford
Diplomats are just as essential in starting a war as soldiers are in finishing it. Will Rogers
Direct action produces direct reaction.
Direct from the Ministry of Silly Walks.
Disclaimer: All opinions are not really opinions.
Disclaimer: Written by a highly caffeinated mammal.
Disclose classified information only when a NEED TO KNOW exists.
Disco is to music what Etch-A-Sketch is to art.
Discontent is something that follows ambition like a shadow. Henry H. Haskins
Discontent is the first step in the progress of a man or a nation. Oscar Wilde
Discover all unpredictable errors before they occur.
Discoveries are made by not following instructions.
Discretion - putting two and two together and keeping your mouth shut.
Disease can be cured; fate is incurable.
Disease is a physical process that generally begins that equality which death completes. Samuel Johnson
Disease is the retribution of outraged Nature. Hosea Ballou
Disguise your feelings when you put your relatives on the plane for home.
Dishonesty is so grasping it would deceive God himself, were it possible. George Bancroft
Dishonesty, cowardice and duplicity are never impulsive. George A. Knight
Dishonor will not trouble me, once I am dead.
Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.
Disk Crash:Abort,Retry,Kill innocent bystandards
Disk Drive - machine part designed to collect dust, cigarette ash, etc.
Disk Error on C: - (A)bort, (R)etry, (D)estruct
Disk Head - that part of a machine designed to be worn down by dust.
Disk crisis, please clean up
Disk crisis, please clean up!
Disk error: (A)bort (R)etry (N)egotiate release of disk?
Disks travel in packs.
DisneyLand: A people trap operated by a mouse.
Dissent does not include the freedom to destroy the system of law which guarantees freedom to speak, assemble and march in protest. Dissent is not anarchy. Seymour F. Simon
Distance is a great promoter of admiration! Denis Diderot
Divers do it better under pressure.
Divers do it deeper.
Division has done more to hide Christ from the view of all men than all the infidelity that has ever been spoken. George MacDonald
Divorce is not an effective deterrent to marriage.
Divorced Barbie doll -- she comes with all of Ken's accessories.
Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?  Ask Data.
Do HD's sneeze when they catch a virus?
Do I even WANT ancestors? Some found I wish I could lose.
Do I smoke after sex?  I never looked.
Do NOT look into laser with remaining eyeball!
Do Not Attempt to Traverse a Chasm in Two Leaps.
Do Not Attempt to Traverse a Chasm in Two Leaps...
Do Not Remove This Tag (Under Penalty of Law)
Do Quarter Horses have only one leg????
Do anything rather than give yourself to reverie. William Ellery Channing
Do artificial plants need artificial water?
Do be a do-bee | Miss Sally
Do be do be do | Sinatra
Do bears bear-eth, do bees bee-eth?| David Addison
Do device drivers need a chauffeur's license?
Do files get embarassed being unZIPped ?
Do files get embarrassed when they get unzipped?
Do fish get thirsty?
Do it now There might be a law against it tomorrow.
Do it today, tomorrow it will be bad for your health or illegal.
Do it today, tomorrow it will be illegal.
Do it with style.
Do married women make the best wives?
Do molecular biologists wear designer genes?
Do not accustom yourself to consider debt only as an inconvenience; you will find it a calamity. Samuel Johnson
Do not adjust your mind, the fault is with reality.
Do not answer a fool according to his folly, or you will be like him yourself. Miscellaneous Proverb
Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight. Benjamin Franklin
Do not arouse disdainful mind when you prepare a broth of wild grasses; do not arouse joyful mind when you prepare a fine cream soup. Dogen
Do not attempt to do a thing unless you are sure of yourself; but do not relinquish it simply because someone else is not sure of you. Stewart E. White
Do not attempt to traverse a chasm in two leaps...
Do not bathe if there is no water. Shan Proverb
Do not be in a hurry to tie what you cannot untie. English Proverb
Do not be led astray onto the path of virtue.
Do not be overly suspicious where it is not warranted.
Do not believe everything you hear or anything you say.
Do not believe in miracles - rely upon them.
Do not believe in miracles -- rely on them.
Do not believe in miracles--rely on them.
Do not believe in miracles. Rely on them.
Do not bite at the bait of pleasure till you know there is no hook. Thomas Jefferson
Do not call for black power or green power. Call for brain power. Barbara Jordan
Do not clog intellect's sluices with bits of knowledge of questionable uses.
Do not clog intellect's sluices with knowledge of questionable uses.
Do not conceive that fine clothes make fine men, any more than fine feathers make fine birds. A plain, genteel dress is more admired, obtains more credit in the eyes of the judicious and sensible. George Washington
Do not confuse motion and progress. A rocking horse keeps moving but does not make any progress. Alfred A. Montapert
Do not count your chickens before they are hatched.
Do not curse the darkness, check your warranty.
Do not disturb -- I'm disturbed enough already.
Do not disturb. Already disturbed!
Do not do what you would undo if caught. Leah Arendt
Do not drink coffee in the morning or it will keep you awake until noon.
Do not employ handsome servants. Chinese Proverb
Do not expect the world to look bright, if you habitually wear gray-brown glasses. Charles Eliot
Do not expose this tagline to direct sunlight.
Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail. Muriel Strode
Do not fumble with a woman's logic.
Do not in an instant what an age cannot recompense.
Do not kiss an elephant on the lips today.
Do not learn more than you absolutely need to get through life. Karl Kraus
Do not learn the tricks of the trade--learn the trade.
Do not lend money to a fiend.
Do not lengthen the quarrel while there is an opportunity of escaping. Latin Proverb
Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do. John Wooden Experience is often what you get when you were expecting something else. Anonymous
Do not meet troubles half-way.
Do not merely believe in miracles, rely on them.
Do not mind anything that anyone tells you about anyone else. Judge everyone and everything for yourself. Henry James
Do not mistake a child for his symptom. Erik Erikson
Do not overestimate the decency of the human race. H.L. Mencken
Do not pay any attention to this.
Do not protect yourself by a fence, but rather by your friends. Czech Proverb
Do not put statements in the negative form.
Do not put your spoon into the pot which does not boil for you. Romanian Proverb
Do not read beyond this line.
Do not read this fortune under penalty of law.	(Penal Code sec. 2.3.2 (II.a))
Do not read this fortune under penalty of law. (Penal Code sec. 2.3.2 (II.a))
Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many. Anonymous
Do not remove this tagline under penalty of law.
Do not remove under penalty of law.
Do not sleep in a eucalyptus tree tonight.
Do not speak about Time, until you have spoken to him.
Do not stand in a place of danger trusting in miracles. Arab Proverb
Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive.
Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive. Elbert Hubbard
Do not tell big lies.  Small ones can be just as effective.
Do not throw the arrow which will return against you. Kurdish Proverb
Do not underestimate the power of the Force.
Do not wait for extraordinary circumstances to do good; try to use ordinary situations. Jean Paul Richter
Do not wait for extrordinary circumstances to do good; try to use ordinary situations. Jean Paul Richter
Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person. Mother Teresa
Do not wrong or hate your neighbor for it is not he that you wrong but yourself. Native American Proverb (Pima)
Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
Do something unusual today. Pay a bill.
Do steam rollers really roll steam?
Do televangelists do more than lay people?
Do the joke. Get the laugh. Move on.
Do unto others JUST BEFORE they do unto you
Do unto others JUST BEFORE they do unto you!
Do unto others as they should do unto you but won't.
Do unto others as though you were the other.
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you Proverb
Do unto others before they do unto you.
Do unto others before they undo you.
Do unto others such that they cannot do unto you.
Do vampires get AIDS?
Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
Do wah ditty ditty dum ditty do
Do well and you will have no need for ancestors.
Do well, you hear it never. Do ill, hear it forever.
Do what good thou canst unknown, and be not vain of what ought rather to be felt than seen. William Penn
Do what you can, with what you have, where you are. Theodore Roosevelt
Do what you feel in your heart to be right, for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do and damned if you don't. Eleanor Rooseveldt
Do you C my point?
Do you always hit the nail right on the thumb?
Do you feel Lucky, punk???
Do you have a job?
Do you have lysdexia?
Do you know JESUS? If so, tell him he owes me $2.
Do you know Montana?
Do you know how many of those pills it takes to prevent a super baby?| Lois Lane
Do you know how to keep a BBSer in suspense?
Do you know that the ready concession of minor points is a part of the grace of life? Henry Harland
Do you know what a pessimist is? A man who thinks everybody as nasty as himself, and hates them for it. George Bernard Shaw
Do you know what floccinaucinihilipilification means?
Do you like good music? That sweet Soul Music.| Atlantic Records
Do you like me for my brain or my baud?
Do you love me for my brain or my baud ?
Do you mind if I sit back a little? Because your breath is very bad. Donald Trump, hotel and casino owner, to Larry King, talk show host, 1989
Do you need me for anything, or shall I just sit here and rust?| Marvin, the paranoid android
Do you use MCI? So do I. List me as a friend...
Do you want fries with that?| McDonald's slogan
Do you want to see something swell?|Pick up line
Do you want to trace your family tree? Run for public office. Patricia H. Vance
Do your knees buckle, but not your belt?
Doc, note, I dissent.  A fast never prevents a fatness.  I diet on cod.
Docs....I don't need no stinkin' docs!
Doctor Who for president
Doctor, my brain hurts!
Documentation - The worst part of programming.
Documentation is for people who can't read.
Documentation is the castor oil of programming ...
Does "Bad FAT" mean disk has high cholesterol?
Does "Forsaking All Others" mean I can't date?
Does FAKE fur come from stuffed animal toys?
Does Mike Tyson live near here? Nelson Mandela, South African president, during a tour of New York City, 1990
Does Windows 3 ever need to be cleaned ?
Does Windows 3.1 come with a Hard Drive?
Does Windows 3.x ever need to be cleaned ?
Does anybody actually read Taglines ?
Does anybody have a ";" Reminder key?
Does anybody really read these things?
Does bouncing count?
Does fuzzy logic tickle ?
Does history record any case where a majority was right?
Does it really matter if he said he is Batman ?
Does it really matter which cola I drink?
Does killing time damage eternity?
Does killing time harm eternity ?
Does steel wool come from metal sheep?
Does that help at all ?
Does the E's Computer have enough RAM to run Windows?
Does the Enterprise printer use a Queue Continuum?
Does the Enterprise use DOS v 2356.0?
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?
Does the name Pavlov ring a bell ?
Does your back go out more than you do?
Does your computer talk to you?
Doesn't EVERYBODY wear straightjackets?
Dogmatism: Puppyism come to its full growth.
Dogs come when they're called. Cats take a message and get back to you. Mary Bly
Dogs come when you call. Cats have answering machines.
Dogs crawl under Gates, software under Windows.
Dogs crawl under gates, software under Windows 3.x !
Dogs crawl under gates, software under Windows.
Doing Windows in C is a pane in the glass.
Doing a little work around the house. I put fake brick wallpaper over a real brick wall, just so I'd be the only one who knew. People come over and I'm gonna say, 'Go ahead, touch it...it feels real.' Stephen Wright
Doing business without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark. You know what you are doing, but nobody else does. Steuart H. Britt
Doing gets it done.
Doing it the hard way is always easier.
Doing my part to preserve order in the universe
Doing nothing makes you tired 'cause you can't take a break.
Dollars cannot buy yesterday.
Domestic happiness and faithful friends.
Don't I know you?
Don't Panic
Don't Start Any Trouble, And There Won't Be Any!
Don't Support Shareware, just their Authors!
Don't Take Life Seriously, It Is Not Permanent.
Don't Think SCHEME
Don't Touch That Phone...I'm On The Mode+^%$#(*@
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. Ann Landers, author
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful., Ann Landers
Don't advertise: Tell it to a gossip.
Don't agonize. Organize. Florynce Kennedy
Don't ask me, I have intermittent memory loss
Don't ask me, I only work here.
Don't ask me, I'm making this up as I go!
Don't ask me; I was hired for my looks.
Don't ask the barber whether you need a haircut. Daniel Greenberg
Don't ask why, just do it.
Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain.
Don't attempt communication with dead people; it will only lead to psychological problems. | Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
Don't be a fool; Vulcanize your tool.
Don't be a schmuck... BE A SCHMUCK
Don't be a snob. Never lie when truth is more profitable.
Don't be afraid to give your best to what seemingly are small jobs. Every time you conquer one it makes you that much stronger. If you do
Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated; you can't cross a chasm in two small jumps. William Lloyd George
Don't be afraid to take a big step when one is indicated. You can't cross a chasm in two small steps. David Lloyd George
Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin. Grace Hansen
Don't be an agnostic. Be something. Robert Frost
Don't be an agnosticbe something. Robert Frost
Don't be conspicuous. In the combat zone, it draws fire. Out of the combat zone, it draws sergeants. Murphy's Seventh Military Law
Don't be mad about growing old, some aren't that lucky.
Don't be overly suspicious where it's not warranted.
Don't be so humble. You're not that great. Golda Meir
Don't be so open-minded your brains fall out.
Don't be too sweet lest you be eaten up; don't be too bitter lest you be spewed out. Jewish Proverb
Don't believe anything you hear or anything you say.
Don't believe anything you read, especially taglines.
Don't believe anything you read, especially tags
Don't believe everything you hear or anything you say.
Don't believe in miracles, expect them.
Don't bite the hand that has your allowance in it. Paul Dickson
Don't blame me I was dancing Friday night
Don't blame me! I was dancing Friday night!
Don't blame me... I didn't do it!
Don't buy furs, it takes trees to make protest signs.
Don't byte off more than you can multiplex.
Don't comment bad code -- rewrite it.
Don't compare floating point numbers solely for equality.
Don't condescend to unskilled labor. Try it for half a day first. Brooks Atkinson
Don't confuse me with facts, my mind's already made up!
Don't count your bridges before you burn them.
Don't count your chickens before they hatch Proverb
Don't count your upgrades before they're patched!
Don't crush that dwarf, hand me the pliers.
Don't crush that dwarf;  hand me the pliers.
Don't cry over spilt milk Proverb
Don't cut off your nose to spite your face Proverb
Don't cut off your nose to spite your face.
Don't despair -- your ideal lover is waiting for you around the corner.
Don't diddle code to make it faster -- find a better algorithm.
Don't diet, download a virus to remove the FAT.
Don't dig your grave with your own knife and fork. English Proverb
Don't do what I SAY, do what I mean!
Don't drink and drive - Smoke dope and fly home.
Don't drink and park, accidents cause people
Don't drink water. Fish make love in it.
Don't eat yellow snow.
Don't even think of putting a tagline here.
Don't ever slam a door; you might want to go back.
Don't ever slam the door; you might want to go back. Don Herold
Don't ever stand up to be counted or someone will take your seat.
Don't everyone thank me at once.
Don't expect to build up the weak by pulling down the strong. Calvin Coolidge
Don't fall before you're pushed. English Proverb
Don't feed the bats tonight.
Don't flatter yourself that friendship authorizes you to say disagreeable things to your intimates. The nearer you come into relation with a person, the more necessary do tact and courtesy become. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Don't force it, get a larger hammer.
Don't force it, use a bigger hammer.
Don't force it; get a larger hammer. Anthony's Law of Force
Don't gamble with security.
Don't gamble; take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don't go up, don't buy it. Will Rogers
Don't get hooked on drugs, get hooked on fishing.
Don't get mad, get even.| Robert F. Kennedy
Don't get stuck in a closet -- wear yourself out.
Don't get yourself involved with persons or situations that can't bear inspection.
Don't give a woman advice; one should never give a woman anything she can't wear in the evening. Oscar Wilde
Don't give up, I'm proud of who you are.
Don't go surfing in South Dakota for a while.
Don't go to sleep under big animals, e.g., elephants, rhinoceri, hippopotamuses | Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"
Don't guess - check your security regulations.
Don't happy, be worry !
Don't hate me, I'm just a tagline.
Don't hate yourself in the morning - Sleep till noon.
Don't hate yourself in the morning - sleep until noon.
Don't hate yourself in the morning -- sleep till noon.
Don't have a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent. Anonymous
Don't hide your contempt of the contemptible !
Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting, but never hit soft. Theodore Roosevelt
Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting; but never hit soft. Theodore Roosevelt
Don't hit the keys so hard, it hurts.
Don't insult the alligator till after you cross the river.
Don't interfere with anything in the Constitution. That must be maintained, for it is the only safeguard of our liberties. Abraham Lincoln
Don't judge a book by its cover Proverb
Don't judge a book by its movie.
Don't judge a man by his opinions, but by what his opinions have made him. G. C Lichtenberg
Don't just do something, stand there !
Don't just stand there - do something. Anonymous
Don't just stand there, scratch my back!
Don't just stand there...KNEEL!!
Don't kill the whale.
Don't knock the weather; nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while. Kin Hubbard
Don't know what apathy is and don't care....
Don't laugh at youth for his affectations; he is only trying on one face after another to find his own. Logan P. Smith
Don't laugh.  Your daughter could be in this vehicle.|Bumper sticker
Don't let a fool kiss you or a kiss fool you.
Don't let me get too deep.
Don't let school interfere with your education.
Don't let the sun catch you crying.
Don't let your sorrow come higher than your knees. Sweedish Proverb
Don't live in a town where there are no doctors. Jewish Proverb
Don't lock the stable door after the horse is stolen Proverb
Don't look Ethyl...  It was too late.
Don't look a gift horse in the mouth Proverb
Don't look at me in that tone of voice!
Don't look back, always look ahead.
Don't look back, the lemmings are gaining on you.
Don't look back. Something might be gaining on you.
Don't look now, but the man in the moon is laughing at you.
Don't look now, but there is a multi-legged creature on your shoulder
Don't make a big deal out of everything; just deal with everything.
Don't make use of another's mouth unless it has been leant to you. Belgian Proverb
Don't marry for money : you can borrow it cheaper.
Don't marry for money...You can borrow it cheaper.
Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
Don't measure yourself by what you have accomplished, but by what you should have accomplished with your ability. John Wooden
Don't mess with Murphy.
Don't mind me; I'm the designated drunk.
Don't need future shock -- Present shock is enough.
Don't need future shock--present shock is enuff.
Don't open a shop unless you know how to smile. Jewish Proverb
Don't open the darkroom door : it lets all the dark out.
Don't overestimate the decency of the human race. H. L. Mencken
Don't overuse exclamation marks
Don't overuse exclamation marks!!!
Don't panic.
Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live. Mark Twain
Don't pat certain animals, e.g., crocodiles and scorpions or dogs you have just kicked. | Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"
Don't patch bad code-- rewrite it.
Don't pick up that phon9  NO CARRIER
Don't place too much confidence in the man who boasts of being as honest as the day is long. Wait until you meet him at night. Robert C. Edwards
Don't play "stupid" with me - I'm better at it.
Don't play for safetyit's the most dangerous thing in the world. Hugh Walpole
Don't play stupid with me, I'm better at it!
Don't play what's there, play what's not there. Miles Davis
Don't press the keys so damned hard!
Don't put all your EXE's in one backup!
Don't put all your eggs in one basket Proverb
Don't put animals with sharp teeth or poisonous fangs down the front of your clothes | Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"
Don't put the cart before the horse Proverb
Don't put too fine a point to your wit for fear it should get blunted.
Don't question authority..... It hasn't got a clue!!!!!
Don't quit now, we might just as well lock the door and throw away the key.
Don't quit until you find someone to blame.
Don't read everything you believe.
Don't run too far, you will have to return the same distance. Biblical Proverb
Don't rush me.  I get paid by the hour.
Don't shoot the pianist.
Don't smother each other. No one can grow in the shade. Leo F. Buscaglia
Don't speak about Time, until you have spoken to him.
Don't speak now, and forever hold your peace.
Don't speak unless you can improve on the silence. Spanish Proverb
Don't start with me. You know how I get.
Don't stay long when the husband is not at home. Japanese Proverb
Don't steal - the government hates competition..
Don't steal : the government doesn't like the competition.
Don't steal! The government hates the competition.
Don't steal, the government doesn't like the competition
Don't steal.....Politicians hate competition.
Don't steal; thou'lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat. Ambrose Bierce
Don't stop at one bug.
Don't stop posting, a good laugh breaks up my day nicely
Don't strew me with roses after I'm dead. When Death claims the light of my brow No flowers of life will cheer me: instead You may give me my roses now! Thomas F. Healey
Don't surround yourself with yourself.
Don't sweat it -- it's only ones and zeros.
Don't sweat it, it's only ones and zeros.
Don't take life seriously - won't get out alive!
Don't take life so seriously.  It won't last.
Don't take life too seriously -- you'll never get out if it alive.
Don't take life too seriously, it's not permanent.
Don't take life too seriously, you'll NEVER get out alive
Don't take life too seriously. You'll never get out of it alive.
Don't take life too seriously; you won't get out of it alive.
Don't take the bull by the horns, take him by the tail; then you can let go when you want to. Josh Billings
Don't talk to me until I've had my second cup of coffee
Don't talk unless you can improve the silence.
Don't tell any big lies today. Small ones can be just as effective.
Don't tell me that worry doesn't do any good. I know better. The things I worry about don't happen. Anonymous
Don't tell your friends about your indegestion. 'How are you.' is a greeting, not a question. Arthur Guiterman
Don't thank me for insulting you. It was my pleasure...
Don't think of organ donations as giving up part of yourself to keep a total stranger alive. It's really a total stranger giving up almost all of themselves to keep part of you alive.
Don't think of retiring from the world until the world will be sorry that you retire. I hate a fellow whom pride or cowardice or laziness drive into a corner, and who does nothing when he is there but sit and growl. Let him come out as I do, and bark. Samuel Johnson
Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water is calm. Malayan Proverb
Don't throw away the old bucket until you know whether the new one holds water. Sweedish Proverb
Don't torture yourself...that's my job.
Don't touch it! It's the history eraser button you fool!
Don't touch that keyboard. We'll be right back.
Don't try to confuse me with the facts !
Don't try to go too fast. Learn your job. Don't ever talk until you know what you're talking about.... If you want to get along, go along. Sam Rayburn
Don't try to make children grow up to be like you, or they may do it. Russell Baker
Don't try to saw sawdust.
Don't unplug it, it will just take a moment to fix.| Famous last words
Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.
Don't use commas, which, aren't necessary.
Don't use contractions in formal writing.
Don't use no double negatives.
Don't use our trashcan, it's only for apples !
Don't vote--it only encourages them
Don't vote--it only encourages them!
Don't vote. It incourages them!
Don't wait for the last judgment. It takes place every day. Albert Camus
Don't wait for the translation...answer me now! Gen.Chang
Don't wait for your 'ship to come in,' and feel angry and cheated when it doesn't. Get going with something small. Irene Kassorla
Don't wait for your ship to come in, swim out to it.
Don't walk through the screen door, you might strain yourself.
Don't waste the whole day, laugh at least once.
Don't waste water.  Pee on a friend.
Don't wear earmuffs in a land of rattlesnakes.
Don't worry : the answer's at the back of the book.
Don't worry : the next message will be better !
Don't worry about being in a dangerous situation.  You have the rest of your life to straighten it out.
Don't worry if you're a kleptomaniac, you can always take something for it.
Don't worry over what other people are thinking of you. They're too busy worrying over what you are thinking of them.
Don't worry, I'm fluent in weirdo...
Don't worry, I'm fluent in wierdo.
Don't worry, I'm gong t bckup td
Don't worry, I'm gong t bckup td!&%#~%
Don't worry, be happy.
Don't worry, if everything worked right you'd be out of a job.
Don't worry, it's not loaded.| Famous last words
Don't worry, we can use the transporter.
Don't worry: the answer's at the back of the book.
Don't you hate boring taglines?
Don't you hate when your hand falls asleep and you know it will be up all night? Stephen Wright
Don't you just hate it when they verbify nouns?
Donsen's Law: The specialist learns more and more about less and less until, finally, he knows everything about nothing; while the generalist learns less and less about more and more until, finally, he knows nothing about everything.
Dos: Venerable.  Windows: Vulnerable.  OS/2: Viable.
Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that is the stuff life is made of. Benjamin Franklin
Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time; for that's the stuff life is made of. Benjamin Franklin
Double
Double your drive space Delete Windows
Double your drive space! Delete Windows!
Double your hard drive space with DOS6: Just type DELTREE C:\WINDOWS <
Double!
Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his twin brother. Kahlil Gibran
Doubt is not a pleasant condition, but certainty is absurd., Voltaire
Doubt is the beginning, not the end, of wisdom. George Iles
Doubt is the root of education, not faith.
Down with TLAs! (three letter acronyms)
Down with categorial imperatives.
Down with categorical imperative!
Down with ignurance
Down with ignurance!
Dr. McCoy, I hate your #*@%ing human guts.  Discussion?
Dr. Soong did not intend me to be used this way. | Data
Dracula died in vain.
Dragonslayer needed. Immediate position available.
Drama in her opinion is knowing how to fill a sweater.
Drama is life with the dull bits cut out.
Dramatize:  What well dressed RAM chips wear.
Draw from your fine command of language and say nothing.
Draw the curtain, the fraud is over. Rabelais, last words
Draw your salary before spending it.
Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing
Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing.
Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. Anonymous
Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. Robert Benchley
Dreaming is an act of pure imagination, attesting in all men a creative power, which, if it were available in waking, would make every man a Dante or Shakespeare. H. F. Hedge
Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives. Charles William Dement
Dreams are nothing but incoherent ideas, occasioned by partial or imperfect sleep. Benjamin Rush
Dreams are renewable. No matter what our age or condition, there are still untapped possibilities within us and new beauty waiting to be born. Dr. Dale Turner
Dreams of war, dreams of liars, dreams of dragon's fire.
Drilling for oil is boring.
Drink like a fish - Water only.
Drink nothing without seeing it; Sign nothing without reading it. Spanish Proverb
Drink wet cement, and get completely stoned.
Drink wet cement: Get Stoned.
Drink! for you know not why you go, nor where...
Drive A: not responding. Formating C: instead...
Drive A: not responding.. .Formating C: instead
Drive C: Error, (A)bort (R)etry (I)gnore (K)ick (S)cream
Drive C: Error, (A)bort (R)etry (I)gnore (K)ick (S)cream?
Drive Offensively!
Drive carefully in "Heavy Fallout" areas; people could be staggering illegally. | Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
Drive carefully, death is so permanent.
Drive defensively -- buy a tank.
Drive defensively, buy a tank.
Drive nail here [  ] for new monitor.
Drive not ready: Abort, Retry, Fail, Wait?
Drive slower than your guardian angel can fly.
Driving Lesson One: Shiny side up; rubber side down.
Drop 'cid not bombs.
Drop 'em.|Pick up line
Drop me a line...anytime!
Drop that pickle
Drop that pickle!
Drop the vase and it will become a Ming of the past.
Drop your CARRIER - we have got you surrounded!!!
Drop your carrier, we have you surrounded !
Dropped from my peeling lips like lousy fruit.
Drunk Borg: "Rsilience in floor tile. Wan'be similated?"
Drunk is feeling sophisticated when you can't say it.
Duck who fly upside down have quack up.
Ducks? What ducks?
Duct tape is like The Force-it holds the universe together
Dudley Moore is a phallic thimble.
Due to Budget Constraints light at end of tunnel is off!
Duh. . . I didn't know FORMAT C: did that?
Dumb Questions are better than smart mistakes!
Dumb Terminal - doesn't understand what you're trying to get it to do.
Dumb luck beats sound planning every time.
Dumb luck beats sound planning every time.  Trust me.
Dumb luck beats sound planning every time. Trust me.
Dumb questions are better than smart mistakes.
Durians, real fruits for real people.
During the blizzard we had three feet of snow, and the pigs are only 18 inches tall. We had to dig tunnels so they could get out. Dale Riffle, who, along with Jim Brewer, maintains a haven for unwanted Vietnamese Pot-Bellied Pigs in West Virginia, 1996
Duty is the sublimest word in our language. Do your duty in all things. You cannot do more. You should never do less. Robert E. Lee
Duty is what one expects from others.
Dwell not upon thy weariness, thy strength shall be according to the measure of thy desire. Arab proverb
Dying is easy. Comedy is difficult. Edmund Gwenn, last word
Dynamic linking error: Your mistake is now everywhere.
Dyslexia rules KO.
Dyslexics have more fnu.
Dyslexics of the World : Untie !
E Pluribus Unix
E=Mc^5...nahhh...E=Mc^4...nahh...E=Mc^3...ah, the hell with it.
E=mc^2 Very good, Albert. Next time show your work.
EAGLES May Soar, But Weasles Arn't Sucked Into Jets.
EDITOR: A person employed on a newspaper whose business it is to separate the wheat from the chaff, and to see that the chaff is printed. Elbert Hubbard
EDLIN doesn't have a bug...EDLIN _IS_ a bug.
EGGORY (eg' er ee) n. The part of the fridge that holds the eggs.
ELVIS HAD MY U.F.O. BABY!
EMS: Enhanced Money Scam
ENERGIZE, said Picard, and a pink bunny appeared.
ERROR 103: Dead mouse in hard drive.
ERROR 6F35: Enter any 12-digit prime number to continue.
ERROR : CPU not found.
ERROR : LPT1 not found... use backup -- PENCIL & PAPER
ERROR:  CPU not found
ERROR: REALITY.SYS Corrupted -- Universe unrecoverable
ERROR: Unable to come up with a good tagline.
ET; phone home. (9368428709:6448/31299.874)
EVANS' AND BJORN'S LAW: No matter what goes wrong, there is always somebody who knew it would.
EVANS' LAW: If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, you don't understand the problem.
EXPANSION SLOTS: The extra holes in your belt buckle.
EXPERT: An ordinary man away from home giving advice. Oscar Wilde
EZ come ... EZ go   SLMR come... He stay!
Each day the world turns over on someone who was just sitting on top of it.
Each day we are confronted with insurmountable opportunities.
Each generation produces its squad of 'moderns' with peashooters to attack Gibraltar. Channing Pollock
Each man has his own vocation; his talent is his call. There is one direction in which all space is open to him. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Each man is led by his own liking. Virgil
Each new year brings better and brighter expectations.
Each of us bears his own Hell.
Each one sees what he carries in his heart. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Each problem solved introduces a new unsolved problem.
Each year, one vicious habit rooted out, in time ought to make the worst man good. Benjamin Franklin
Eagles Soar!, but weasels aren't sucked into jets!
Eagles Soar, but weasels arn't sucked into jets
Eagles fly, but weasels aren't sucked into jet engines!
Eagles fly, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
Early morning cheerfulness can be extremely obnoxious. William Feather
Early to bed - makes you healthy, wealthy and boring.
Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise Proverb
Early to bed, early to rise makes people suspicious.
Early to rise and early to bed makes a man healthy, wealthy and dead.
Earn cash in your spare time - blackmail your friends.
Earth and sky, woods and fields, lakes and rivers, the mountain and the sea, are excellent schoolmasters, and teach some of us more than we can ever learn from books.
Earth hath no sorrow that heaven cannot heal. Thomas Moore
Earth is 98% full...please delete anyone you can.
Earth is but the frozen echo of the silent voice of God. Samuel M. Hageman
Earth was not earth before her sons appeared.
Earth, thou great footstool of our God, who reigns on high; thou fruitful source of all our raiment, life, and food; our house, our parent, and our nurse. Isaac Watts
Earth- Mostly Harmless (HHGTG 2nd ed.)
Earth:  Its only ours to borrow!
Earth: A solid substance, much desired by the seasick.
Earthquakes are Earth's way of saying, WAKE UP
Easter is cancelled this year.  They've found the body.
Easy Does It. But Do It !
Easy as pie, no fuss, no muss, no crust....
Eat Crap!  10 Trillion flies can't be wrong.
Eat My Shorts
Eat a live toad in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you for the rest of the day.
Eat any good books lately ~ Q
Eat more Possum!
Eat more possum.| West Virginian bumper sticker
Eat prune yogurt for that "get up and go" feeling.
Eat the rich - the poor are tough and stringy.
Eat to please thyself, but dress to please others. Benjamin Franklin
Eat well, exercise, and die anyway.
Eat yogurt and get culture.
Eat yogurt and get cultured.
Eating an anchovy is like eating an eyebrow.
Eating and scratching want but a beginning. Romanian Proverb
Eating while seated makes one of large size; eating while standing makes one strong. Hindu Proverb
Eating words has never given me indigestion. Sir Winston Churchill
Eating words has never given me indigestion. Winston Churchill
Ebius tagline. This is a moebius tagline. This is a mo ...
Echo: Only thing that cheats some out of the last word.
Economics is extremely useful as a form of employment for economists.
Economy is a way of spending money without getting any pleasure out of it. Armand Salacrou
Economy is for the poor; the rich may dispense with it. Christian Nestell Bovee
Economy makes men independent.
Ecosystems, schmecosystems.| Exxon
Edged tools are dangerous things to handle, and not infrequently do much hurt. Agnes Repplier
Edit, Save, Exit, Assemble, Link, Run, Curse, [Ctrl+Alt+Del], Edit...
Editing is a rewording activity.
Education helps earning capacity.  Ask any college professor.
Education is a better safeguard of liberty than a standing army. Edward Everett
Education is a progressive discovery of our ignorance. Will Durant
Education is a social process ... Education is growth.... Education is, not a preparation for life; education is life itself. John Dewey
Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught. Oscar Wilde, english author
Education is an admirable thing, but nothing that is worth knowing can be taught. Oscar Wilde
Education is that which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding. Ambrose Bierce
Education is the fire-proofer of emotions. Frank Crane
Education is the period during which you are being instructed by somebody you do not know, about something you do not want to know. Gilbert K. Chesterton
Education is the process of casting false pearls before real swine.
Education is the process of driving a set of prejudices down your throat. Martin H. Fischer
Education is too important to be left solely to the educators. Francis Keppel
Education is what survives when what has been learned has been forgotten. B F Skinner, american psychologist
Education is what you have left over after you have forgotten everything you have learned.
Education makes people easy to lead, but difficult to drive; easy to govern, but impossible to enslave. Henry Peter Brougham
Education means developing the mind, not stuffing the memory.
Education which is not modern, faces the organic fate.
Education, then, beyond all other devices of human origin, is the great equalizer of the conditions of men-the balance-wheel of the social machinery. Horace Mann
Effective Gun Control:  Keep muzzle pointed at target.
Efficiency is the ability to do a job well plus the desire to do it better.
Efficiency takes time  Frugality: who can afford it?
Efficiency takes time! Frugality: who can afford it?
Egghead: What Mrs. Dumpty gave Humpty
Eggheads unite!  You have nothing to lose but your yolks.
Ego Gratification through Violence
Ego: Something which enables people to bear living with themselves.
Egotist: a person of low taste. more interested in himself than me.
Ehh, Whats up doc?| B. Bunny
Eight out of five schizophrenics agree!
Einstein has "I before E" wrong in his own name, twice!
Either I will find a way, or I will make one. Philip Sidney
Either the wallpaper goes or I do. Oscar Wilde, last words
Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing. Benjamin Franklin
Ekkey ekkey ekkey p'tang wheee
Ekkie ekkie phatang zooboing
Ekkie ekkie phatang zooboing!
Electric chairs are period furniture: they end a sentence
Electric chairs are period furniture; they end a sentence.
Electrical Engineers do it till it Hz.
Electrician -- Person who wires for money
Electricians are qualified to remove anyone's shorts!
Electrolosis - the process of getting shocked
Elegant Frankfurter - A haute dog
Elevator men do it on all floors
Elevators smell different to midgets
Eliminate government waste no matter how much it costs.
Elizabeth Arden The most radical revolutionary will become a conservative the day after the revolution. Hannah Arendt
Elliptic paraboloids for sale.
Eloquence is logic on fire.
Elvis is alive and doing my laundry.
Elvis is dead and I don't feel so good myself.
Emotion is the surest arbiter of a poetic choice, and it is the priest of all supreme unions in the mind. Max Eastman
Emotion turning back on itself, and not leading on to thought or action, is the element of madness. John Sterling
Emotion vs logic ? Emotion always wins.
Employ thy time well if thou meanest to get leisure. Benjamin Franklin
Employ thy time well, if thou meanest to gain leisure. Benjamin Franklin
Employment brings enjoyment.
Empty vessels make the most sound.
Endocannibalism: The result of a really hungry cannibal.
Energizer Bunny Arrested! Charged with battery.
Engineers : often wrong, seldom in doubt.
Engineers do it precisely. Technicians do it a lot.
Engineers:  often wrong, seldom in doubt
England are a goal ahead -- that's a win if it stays that way.
English is wonderful, when used correctly.
Engraving is, in brief terms, the art of scratch.
Enjoy me, I may never pass this way again.
Enjoy what thou has inherited from thy sires if thou wouldst really possess it. What we employ and use is never an oppressive burden; what the moment brings forth, that only can it profit by. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Enjoy what you can, endure what you must. Goethe
Enjoy your life; be pleasant and gay, like the birds in May.
Enjoy yourself - spring is here
Enjoy yourself. It's later than you think. Chinese Proverb
Enjoyment is my speciality.
Enlighten the people generally, and tyranny and oppressions of body and mind will vanish like evil spirits at the dawn of day. Thomas Jefferson
Enough of blood and tears. Enough! Yitzhak Rabin, Israeli Prime Minister and Nobel Peace Prize recipient, 1994
Enough research will tend to support your theory.
Ensgin Expendable, step on that rock | Kirk
Ensign Pillsbury ? He's BREAD, Jim !
Ensign Pillsbury:  He's bread Jim
Ensign Singer... Make it sew.
Ensign Walnut approaches Dr. Crusher with caution.
Ensign, engage datasuck mode
Ensign, engage warp drive. Ensign? ENSIGN, WAKE UP!
Enter that again, just a little slower.
Enter your personal identification number.
Entropy ain't what it used to be.
Entropy isn't what it used to be.
Envy is a pain of mind that successful men cause their neighbors.
Envy is thin because it bites but never eats.
Epitaph on a gravestone: Cheerio, see you soon.
Epoch:  the sound made by a hen
Equal bytes for women.
Equal opportunity means everyone will have a fair chance at being incompetent. Laurence J. Peter
Equality is a myth - women are better!
Equinox - Cross between a horse and a cow.
Ere you consult your fancy, consult your purse. Benjamin Franklin
Eres encantador.
Eres precioso.
Errare umanum est.
Error #1511 : Brain Offline.
Error #1511: Brain Offline
Error - Operator out of memory!
Error - [A]bort, [R]etry, [F]ake like it's working...
Error 005: Windows loading. Come back tomorrow.
Error 216: Tagline out of paper
Error 96:  Dead mouse in hard drive.
Error 99 - CPU too tired to continue...
Error : (A)bort (R)etry (S)ell it
Error : Operator out of memory !
Error : [A]bort, [R]etry, [F]ake like it's working ?
Error failed! Press any key to resume error.
Error finding REALITY.SYS  -  Universe halted.
Error finding REALITY.SYS -- Universe halted.
Error in REALITY.SYS.  Run BIGBANG.EXE (Y/N)
Error is discipline through which we advance. William Ellery Channing
Error of opinion may be tolerated where reason is left free to admit it. Thomas Jefferson
Error opening COLDBEER.CAN  Glass not ready.
Error reading FAT Table...Try Skinny one ? (Y/N)
Error reading FAT table.  Try SKINNY one?  (Y/N)
Error: (A)bort (R)etry (S)ell it
Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.
Es hombre el que puede decir Soy; No es hombre el que slo dice Mi padre era.
Eschew Obfuscation . . .
Eschew and avoid redundant obfuscation.
Eschew dialect, irregardless.
Eschew obfuscation
Eschew obfuscation.
Eschew obfuscation. Anonymous
Eschew obfuscation.|Bumper sticker
Escort GT - An oxymoron
Espresso: ultra-efficient caffeine delivery system
Established technology tends to persist in spite of new technology.
Eternal Vigilance is the price of liberty. Thomas Jefferson
Eternal nothingness is fine if you're dressed for it.
Eternal rest sounds comforting in the pulpit; well, you try it once, and see how heavy time will hang on your hands. Mark Twain
Eternal vigilance is the price of liberty. Thomas Jefferson
Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny
Ethics is not necessarily the handmaiden of theology.
Ettore's law: the other line always moves faster
Eureka
Eureka!
Evangelists do more than lay people.
Even God lends a hand to honest boldness.
Even Programers need a bit of love.
Even a cabbage may look at a king.
Even a clock that does not work is right twice a day. Polish Proverb
Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue. Miscellaneous Prover
Even a hawk is an eagle among crows.
Even a noseless dog can stink.
Even a philosopher gets upset with a toothache.
Even a small star shines brightly in the dark.
Even a stopped clock is right twice a day. Anonymous
Even cowards can endure hardship; only the brave can endure suspense. Mignon McLaughlin
Even if you persuade me, you won't persuade me.
Even if you win the rat race, you're still a rat.
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. Will Rogers
Even if you're on the right trackyou'll get run over if you just sit there. Arthur Godfrey
Even moderation ought not to be practiced to excess.
Even on the most exalted throne in the world we are only sitting on our own bottom. Michel de Montaigne
Even paranoids have enemies.
Even small mouths can gather BIG feet!
Even supervising can be fun you know.
Even the best of friends cannot attend each other's funeral.
Even the best things are not equal to their fame. Henry David Thoreau
Even the blind can see money.
Even the boldest zebra fears the hungry lion.
Even the dullest candle burns brighter in the dark.
Even the lion has to defend himself against flies. Anonymous
Even the lion has to protect himself against flies.
Even the smallest candle burns brighter in the dark.
Even this shall pass away...
Even though this is late in an election year, there is no way we can go forward except together and no way anybody can win except by serving the people's urgent needs. We cannot stand still or slip backwards. We must go forward now together. Gerald R. Ford
Even though you know a thousand things, ask the man who knows one. Turkish Proverb
Events in the past may be roughly divided into those which probably never happened and those which do not matter. W. R. Inge
Ever feel like the whole world is a cigarette and you're the only ashtray.
Ever feel like you're not really wanted? * Geordi
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation. Kahlil Gibran, from The Prophet
Ever have one of those millennia?
Ever help the person behind the counter with their terminal/computer?
Ever just seem to not be able to get around to procrastinating?
Ever lob a live grenade into a basket of kittens?
Ever notice how fast Windows runs? Neither did I.
Ever notice how fast Windows runs? Neither did I...
Ever notice how irons have a setting for *permanent* press? I don't get it... Stephen Wright
Ever notice that Legos aren't biodegradable ?
Ever notice that even the busiest people are never too busy to tell you just how busy they are.
Ever shoot an elephant in your pajamas?
Ever stop to think and forget to start again ?
Ever stop to think and then forget to start again?
Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
Ever think about the fact that thorn bushes have roses?
Ever wanted to download pizza?
Ever wanted to have crazed sex with beautiful alien beings?  Then THIS may be for YOU!
Ever wish you had a copy of tomorrow's newspaper?
Ever wonder what O.O.P. Fortrash would look like ?
Ever wonder why Oprah spelled backwards is Harpo?
EverReady bunny arrested, charged with battery!
Every absurdity has a champion to defend it, for error is always talkative. Oliver Goldsmith
Every absurdity has a champion to defend it.
Every act of creation is first of all an act of destruction. Pablo Picasso
Every action of our lives touches on some chord that will vibrate in eternity. Edwin Hubbel Chapin
Every animal knows more than you do. Native American Proverb (Nez Perce)
Every burned book enlightens the world. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Every child should be given the desire to learn.
Every citizen should be a soldier. This was the case with the Greeks and Romans, and must be that of every free state. Thomas Jefferson
Every cloud engenders not a storm.
Every cloud has a silver lining Proverb
Every cloud has a silver lining, but it is sometimes difficult to get it to the mint. Don Marquis
Every cloud has a silver lining.
Every compulsion is put upon writers to become safe, polite, obedient, and sterile. Sinclair Lewis
Every country has the government it deserves. Joseph de Maistre
Every creature has within itself the wild, uncontrollable urge to punt.
Every crisis offers you extra desired power. William Moulton Marston
Every crowd has a silver lining.
Every crowd has a silver lining. P. T. Barnum
Every dark cloud has a Latinum lining.
Every day is starting to look like Monday...
Every difficulty slurred over will be a ghost to disturb your repose later on. Chopin
Every great advance in science has issued from a new audacity of imagination. John Dewey
Every great advance in science has issued from a new audacity of the imagination. John Dewey, from The Quest For Certainty
Every guest hates the others, and the host hates them all. Albanian Proverb
Every guilty person is his own hangman. Seneca
Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired, signifies in the final sense a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed., from an address to the American Society of Newspaper Editors, 4/16/53 Dwight D. Eisenhower
Every hard-boiled egg is yellow inside.
Every human being has a work to carry on within, duties to perform abroad, influence to exert, which are peculiarly his, and which no conscience but his own can teach. William Ellery Channing
Every human mind is a great slumbering power until awakened by a keen desire and by definite resolution to do. Edgar F. Roberts
Every instructor assumes that you have nothing else to do except study for that instructor's course.|
Every job is a self-portrait of the person who did it. Autograph your work with excellence.
Every king springs from a race of slaves, and every slave had kings among his ancestors. Plato
Every life is a profession of faith, and exercises an inevitable and silent influence. Amiel
Every little BYTE helps
Every little BYTE helps.
Every little picofarad has a nanohenery of it's own.
Every little picofarad has a nanohenry all its own.
Every little thing counts in a crisis. Jawaharlal Nehru
Every luxury must be paid for, and everything is a luxury, starting with being in the world. Cesare Pavese
Every man alone is sincere; at the entrance of a second person hypocrisy begins. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Every man has a mob self and an individual self, in varying proportions. D. H. Lawrence
Every man has a rainy corner of his life whence comes foul weather which follows him. Jean Paul Richter
Every man has a right to his opinion, but no man has a right to be wrong in his facts. Bernard M. Baruch
Every man has a scheme that absolutely won't work.
Every man has a scheme that will not work.
Every man has his price.
Every man has his price.  Every price has its man.
Every man is a volume if you know how to read him. William Ellery Channing
Every man is as Heaven made him, and sometimes a great deal worse.
Every man is born as many men and dies as a single one. Martin Heidegger
Every man is dishonest who lives upon the labor of others, no matter if he occupies a throne. Robert Green Ingersoll
Every man is guilty of all the good he didn't do. Voltaire
Every man is the architect of his own fortune.
Every man is the architect of his own fortune. Sallust
Every man is the architect of his own life. He builds it just the way he wants it. However, after he has built what he wants, he sometimes decides that he doesn't like what he has built and looks for someone or something to blame instead of changing himself. Sidney Madwed
Every man should have a college education in order to show him how little the thing is really worth. Elbert Hubbard
Every man thinks his own burden the heaviest.
Every man who is high up loves to think that he has done it all himself; and the wife smiles, and lets it go at that. James Matthew Barrie
Every man who observes vigilantly and resolves steadfastly grows unconsciously into genius. Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton
Every man's ability may be strengthened or increased by culture. John Abbott
Every man's life lies within the present; for the past is spent and done with, and the future is uncertain. Marcus Aurelius
Every man's memory is his private literature. Aldous Huxley
Every man's work is a portrait of himself.
Every man, either to his terror or consolation, has some sense of religion. James Harrington
Every morning you are handed 24 golden hours.....
Every new opinion, at its starting, is precisely in a minority of one. Thomas Carlyle
Every noble acquisition is attended with its risks; he who fears to encounter the one must not expect to obtain the other. Metastasio
Every noble work is at first impossible. Thomas Carlyle
Every numerous assembly is a mob; everything there depends on instantaneous turns. Cardinal de Retz
Every person constructs their own bed of nails.
Every person is an individual; we all have a set of designer genes.
Every politician has a price, some hold bargain sales.
Every problem has in it the seeds of its own solution. If you don't have any problems, you don't get any seeds. Norman Vincent Peale
Every program is part of some other program and rarely fits.
Every purchase has its price.
Every quarrel begins in nothing and ends in a struggle for supremacy. Elbert Hubbard
Every silver lining has a cloud around it.
Every silver lining has a dark cloud.
Every sin is the result of a collaboration. Stephen Crane
Every so often, I like to go to the window, look up, and smile for a satellite picture. Stephen Wright
Every so often, we pass laws repealing human nature. Howard Lindsay
Every society honors its live conformists and its dead troublemakers. Mignon McLaughlin
Every solution breeds new problems.
Every solution to a problem only creates new problems.
Every sperm is Sacred!
Every spirit makes its house, but as afterwards the house confines the spirit, you had better build well. Elbert Hubbard
Every sweet has its sour; every evil its good. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Every time Europe looks across the Atlantic to see the American Eagle, it observes only the rear end of an ostrich. H. G. Wells
Every time I lose weight, it finds me again.
Every time a child says 'I don't believe in fairies' there is a little fairy somewhere that falls down dead. James Matthew Barrie
Every time history repeats itself the price goes up. Anonymous
Every tyrant who has lived has believed in freedomfor himself. Elbert Hubbard
Every unpunished murder takes away something from the security of every man's life. Daniel Webster
Every valuable idea offends someone.
Every why hath a wherefore.
Every writer is a narcissist. This does not mean that he is vain; it only means that he is hopelessly self-absorbed. Leo Rosten
Everybody is ignorant only on different subjects. Will Rogers
Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.
Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects. Will Rogers, philosopher
Everybody needs a little love sometime; stop hacking and fall in love
Everybody needs a little love sometime; stop hacking and fall in love!
Everybody ought to have a friend.
Everybody remember where we parked.  | Kirk
Everybody says it, and what everybody says must be true. James Fenimore Cooper
Everybody should believe in something -- I believe I'll have another drink.
Everybody talks about the weather but nobody does anything about it. Charles Dudley Warner
Everybody wants to go to Heaven, but nobody wants to die.
Everyday happiness means getting up in the morning, and you can't wait to finish your breakfast. You can't wait to do your exercises. You can't wait to put on your clothes. You can't wait to get out, and you can't wait to come home, because the soup is hot. George Burns
Everyman has his faults. Ferengi's doubly so.
Everyone IS entitled to my opinion.
Everyone as they loveth, some people kiss cows.
Everyone complains of his memory, no one of his judgment.
Everyone complains of the badness of his memory, but nobody of his judgment. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have any film.
Everyone has a right to a university degree in America, even if it's in Hamburger Technology. Clive James
Everyone has a scheme that will not work.
Everyone has the right to be ugly, but some abuse the priviledge.
Everyone hates me because I'm paranoid.
Everyone is a genius at least once a year.
Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody. Mark Twain
Everyone is born a king, and most people die in exile.
Everyone is enthusiastic about your work.
Everyone is entitled to my opinion, just ask me...
Everyone is entitled to my opinion.
Everyone is entitled to my opinion...             FREE!
Everyone is entitled to their own version of my opinion.
Everyone is gifted. Some open the package sooner.
Everyone is gifted. Some open the pkg sooner.
Everyone is good at something, it's just a matter of finding what.
Everyone is of some use, if only to set a bad example !
Everyone likes flattery, and when it comes to royalty, you should lay it on with a trowel. Benjamin Disraeli
Everyone makes mistakes, if not we'd be single!
Everyone needs a place in the sun, especially when it rains.
Everyone needs a warm personal enemy or two to keep him free from rust in the movable parts of his mind. Gene Fowler
Everyone needs to believe in something; I believe I'll have another beer.
Everyone ought to have a maid.
Everyone serves a purpose in life, even if it is to be a horrible example.
Everyone should keep a mental wastepaper basket, and the older he grows, the more things will he promptly consign to it. Samuel Butler
Everyone stopping by with unsought advice will see your mistake.
Everyone takes the limits of his own vision for the limits of the world. Arthur Schopenhauer
Everyone thinks his own burden heavy. French Proverb
Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself. Leo Tolstoy
Everyone who ever walked barefoot into his child's room late at night hates Legos. Tony Kornheiser
Everyone wishes to have truth on his side, but not everyone wishes to be on the side of truth. Richard Whately
Everyone's so nice to me. What have I done to deserve it?
Everything You Know Is Wrong.
Everything alive either grows or dies.
Everything bows to success, even grammar.
Everything changes except change itself.
Everything comes to him who hustles while he waits. Henry Ford
Everything comes to him who hustles while he waits. Thomas A. Edison
Everything comes to him who waits, except a loaned book. Kin Hubbard
Everything coming your way? You're in the wrong lane!
Everything costs more and takes longer. Pournelle's Law of Costs and Schedules
Everything goes on sale ... right after you buy it.
Everything goes wrong all at once. Quantized Revision of Murphy's Law
Everything goes wrong all at the same time.
Everything goes wrong at once.
Everything going good? You must have overlooked something.
Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it. Confucius
Everything hurts ... and what doesn't don't work.
Everything important has been said before by somebody who did not discover it. Alfred North Whitehead
Everything in excess ! Moderation is for monks.
Everything in our favour was aginst us.
Everything in the world may be endured except continual prosperity. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Everything is just a thing.
Everything is just chemistry.
Everything is sweetened by risk. Alexander Smith
Everything is worth precisely as much as a belch, the difference being that a belch is more satisfying. Ingmar Bergman
Everything put together falls apart, sooner or later.
Everything put together, falls apart, sooner or later.
Everything runs to excess; every good quality is noxious if unmixed. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler. Albert Einstein
Everything should be transparent to the user.
Everything starts as somebody's daydream.
Everything takes longer than you think it will.
Everything takes longer than you think.
Everything takes more time and money.
Everything that can be invented has been invented. Charles Duell, Dir. US Patent Office, 1899
Everything that is not mandatory is forbidden.
Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease. Bill Maher, commedian and commentator, 1995
Everything you know is wrong
Everything you know is wrong!
Everything you know is wrong, but you can be straightened out.
Everything you see I owe to spaghetti. Sophia Loren, actress
Everything's coming up roses.
Everything's going my way.
Everything's got a moral if only you can find it.
Everytime I think I know where it's at, they shift it!
Everywhere I go I'm asked if the universities stifle writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle enough of them. There's many a best seller that could have been prevented by a good teacher. Flannery O'Connor
Everywhere is an LD call from here.
Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time. Stephen Wright
Everywhere is walking distance, if you have the time.
Evil Grin #13  <<<<<GRIN>>>>>
Evil always triumphs over good, because good is STUPID!
Evil is a hill.  We stand on ours, speak about others.
Evolution is RELIGIOUS because it can't be proven
Exaggerated sensitiveness is an expression of the feeling of inferiority. Alfred Adler
Exam is a four-letter word for torture...
Examine the contents, not the bottle.
Examine what is said, not him who speaks. Arab Proverb
Example has more followers than reason. We unconsciously imitate what pleases us, and approximate to the characters we most admire. Christian Nestell Bovee
Excellence in any department can be attained only by the labor of a lifetime; it is not to be purchased at a lesser price. Samuel Johnson
Excellent time become a missing person.
Excellent time to become a missing person.
Except for an occasional heart attack I feel as young as I ever did. Robert Benchley
Excess of grief for the dead is madness; for it is an injury to the living, and the dead know it not. Xenophon
Excess on occasion is exhilarating. It prevents moderation from acquiring the deadening effect of a habit. W. Somerset Maugham, author
Excited, Spock opens a box full of pointy ear tips.
Excreto ergo sum.
Excuse me if I sound bitter... I taste that way too.
Excuse me while I dance a little jig of despair
Excuse me while I sharpen my tongue.
Excuse me, I have to recharge my flamethrower.
Excuse me, can you spare a tagline?
Excuse me, do you know the way to Kansas City ?
Excuse me, do you mind if I squish in here?  | Odo
Excuse me, while I kiss the sky...| Jimi Hendrix
Excuse me. Do you wanna f**k or should I apologize?|Pick up line
Executive ability is prominent in your make-up.
Executive: An ulcer with authority.
Exercise caution in your daily affairs.
Exercise is bunk. If you are healthy, you don't need it; if you are sick, you shouldn't take it. Henry Ford
Expansion means complexity, and complexity decays.
Expect a letter from a friend who will ask a favor of you.
Expect nothing. Live frugally on surprise., Alice Walker
Experience deep trance meditation and communionication with the Space Brothers -- WHILE DRIVING!!
Experience increases our wisdom but doesn't reduce our follies. Josh Billings
Experience is a comb that life gives you after you lose your hair. Judith Stern
Experience is a good school but the fees are high. Heinrich Heine
Experience is a good teacher but her fees are high
Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterwards. Vernon Saunders Law
Experience is a school where a man learns what a big fool he has been. Josh Billings
Experience is directly proportional to computer time wasted.
Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing. Oscar Wilde
Experience is something you don't get, 'til you need it most.
Experience is something you get too late to do anything about the mistakes you made while getting it. Anon.
Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.| F. P. Jones
Experience is the best teacher Proverb
Experience is the comb life gives you after you're bald.
Experience is the name everyone gives to his mistakes.
Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes.
Experience is the name that everyone gives to their mistakes. - Oscar Wilde
Experience is what allows us to repeat our mistakes, only with more finesse! Derwood Fincher It's more fun to arrive a conclusion than to justify it. Malcolm S. Forbes
Experience is what causes a person to make new mistakes instead of old ones.
Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted.
Experience keeps a dear school, but fools will learn in no other. And scarce in that. -- Poor Richard.
Experience should be a guide post, but not a hitching post.
Experience should teach us to be most on our guard to protect liberty when the government's purposes are beneficent. Louis D. Brandeis
Experience shows that success is due less to ability than to zeal. The winner is he who gives himself to his work, body and soul. Charles Buxton
Experience teaches that a strong memory is generally joined to a weak judgment. Michel de Montaigne
Experience varies directly with equipment ruined.
Experience varies directly with the amount of equipment ruined.
Experience: What you get when you don't get what you want
Experience: a name everyone gives to his mistakes.
Experiments should be reproducible.  They should all fail in the same way.
Expert - anyone from out of town.
Expert - knows tomorrow why today's prediction failed.
Explain counter-clockwise to someone with a digital watch.
Exploding Piglet Falls Out Stupid Window...GIF   11
Exploding piglets!!!  My god, it's raining bacon!
Explosive when wet
Express an opinion, but send advice by freight.
External Security:
Extravagance is the luxury of the poor; penury is the luxury of the rich. Oscar Wilde
Extreme fear can neither fight nor fly.
Extreme good-naturedness borders on weakness of character.  Avoid it.
Extremes meet and there is no better example than the haughtiness of humility. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Extremes, though contrary, have the like effects. Extreme heat kills, and so extreme cold: extreme love breeds satiety, and so extreme hatred; and too violent rigor tempts chastity, as does too much license. George Chapman
Extrusion,  Science,  Art, and  luck
Exxon Valdez, Haven, cual ser el prximo?
Eyeing little girls with bad intent, heh.
F u cn rd ths u mst b n nglsh tchr!
F u cn rd ths, u cn gt a gd jb n cmptr prgmmng
F.A.R.T....Fathers Against Radical Teenagers
FACT: A conservative will blink when struck with a hammer
FAHNESTOCK'S RULE: If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
FARMER'S CREDO: Sow your wild oats on Saturday night, then on Sunday pray for crop failure.
FARNSDICK'S COROLLARY TO THE FIFTH COROLLARY: After things have gone from bad to worse, the cycle will repeat itself.
FARNSDICK'S COROLLARY: After things have gone from bad to worse, the cycle will repeat itself.
FEATURE n. A surprising property of a program. Occasionally documented.  See BUG.  A bug can be changed to a feature by documenting it.
FELDMAN'S AXIOM: When all else fails, read the instructions.
FERGUSON'S PRECEPT: A crisis is when you can't say "let's forget the whole thing."
FETT'S LAW OF THE LAB: Never replicate a successful experiment.
FIDELITY: A virtue particular to those about to be betrayed. Ambrose Bierce
FILE NOT FOUND..... Should I fake it? [Y/n].........
FILES=1  BUFFERS=0  FCBS=SAYWHAT  BREAK=GIMME
FINAGLE'S FIFTH RULE: Experiments should be reproducible - they should all fail in the same way.
FINAGLE'S FIRST LAW: If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.
FINAGLE'S FIRST RULE: To study a subject best, understand it thoroughly before you start.
FINAGLE'S FOURTH RULE: In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.
FINAGLE'S SECOND RULE: Always keep a record of data - it indicates you've been working.
FINAGLE'S SIXTH RULE: Do not believe in miracles - rely on them.
FINAGLE'S THIRD RULE: Always draw your curves first, then plot your data.
FINMAN'S PRINCIPLE: The one you want is never the one on sale.
FIRE!! BANG!! OOUUUCH!!!!! Whoops!  Is anyone down range.
FIRST LAW OF COMPUTER PROGRAMMING: The value of a program is proportional to the weight of its output.
FIRST LAW OF DEBATE: Never argue with a fool - people might not know the difference.
FIRST LAW OF TRAVEL: It always takes longer to get there than to get back.
FIRST POSTULATE OF ISO-MURPHISM: Things equal to nothing else are equal to each other.
FIRST RULE OF SUPERIOR INFERIORITY: Don't let your superiors know you're superior to them.
FISKE'S TEENAGE COROLLARY: The stomach expands to accommodate the amount of junk food available.
FLAME v. To speak incessantly and/or rabidly on some relatively uninteresting subject or with a patently ridiculous attitude. FLAME ON: v. To continue to flame. See RAVE.
FLASH!  Intelligence of mankind decreasing.  Details at ... uh, when the little hand is on the ....
FLOPPY DISK: Serious curvature of the spine.
FLUGG'S LAW: When you need to knock on wood is when you realize the world's composed of aluminum and vinyl.
FOO 1. [from the Yiddish 'feh' or Anglo-Saxon 'fooey'] interj.  Term of disgust. 2. Name used for temporary programs, or as arbitrary names.
FOR SALE: Iraqi rifle.  Never fired.  Dropped once.
FOR SALE: Won used spel chekkr, werks grate!
FORD : Fix Often, Repair Daily.
FORD : Found On Road Dead.
FORD = Fix Often, Repair Daily
FORD = Found On Road Dead
FORFEIT: What most animals stand on.
FREEDOM IS ALWAYS AGAINST THE LAW
FROTHINGHAM'S COROLLARY: The mountain looks closer than it is.
FUBB : Fouled Up Beyond Belief.
FUCK 'EM if they can't take a joke!
FUNDAMENTALISM is never having to open your mind.
FUTILITY LAW: No experiment is a complete failure - it can always serve as a negative example.
FUTURE-n That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true, and our happiness is assured. Ambrose Bierce
Faber: Knowledge is good!
Fac meam diem.  -- Clintus Estvoodicus
Fac meum diem. -- Clintus Estvoodus
Fact - red lights always last longer than green ones.
Fact is solidified opinion
Facts are God's arguments; we should be careful never to misunderstand or pervert them. Tryon Edwards
Facts are facts and will not disappear on account of your likes. Jawaharlal Nehru
Facts are stubborn things.
Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
Facts have a cruel way of substituting themselves for fancies. There is nothing more remorseless, just as there is nothing more helpful, than truth. William C. Redfield
Fad: In one era and out the other.
Fahrvergnkie: (n) Sex in a Volkswagon.
Failing to plan is planning to fail. Effie Jones
Failure is more frequently from want of energy than want of capital.
Failure is never fatal and success is never final.
Failure is only the opportunity to begin again more intelligently. Henry Ford
Failure to plan on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.
Failure to prepare is preparing to fail. John Wooden
Failures are divided into two classesthose who thought and never did, and those who did and never thought. John Charles Salak
Fain would I climb, yet fear I to fall.
Faint hearts never win in love nor sell life insurance.
Fairy Tale: A horror story to prepare children for the newspapers.
Faith goes out through the window when beauty comes in at the door.
Faith is love taking the form of aspiration. William Ellery Channing
Faith is the bird that sings while it is still dark.
Faith keeps many doubts in her pay. If I could not doubt, I should not believe. Henry David Thoreau
Faith may be defined briefly as an illogical belief in the occurrence of the improbable. H. L. Mencken
Fakir - Mann som kan beg selvmord og overleve
Fall seven times, stand up eight. Japanese Proverb
False Slack cannot make me happy, but it will provide me with the misery I like the best.
False appearance of fine speech.
False eyelashes | From "101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR"
False friends are worse that open enemies.
False modesty is the refinement of vanity. It is a lie. Jean de La Bruyre
False words are not only evil in themselves, but they infect the soul with evil. Socrates
Fame is a fickle food Upon a shifting plate. Emily Dickinson
Fame is a magnifying glass.
Fame is proof that people are gullible. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Fame is vapor, popularity an accident, riches take wings. Only one thing endures and that is character. Horace Greeley
Fame usually comes to those who are thinking about something else. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Fame: Chiefly a matter of dying at the right moment.
Fame: an embalmer trembling with stage fright. H. L. Mencken
Familiar acts are beautiful through love. Percy Bysshe Shelley
Familiarity breeds attempt.
Familiarity breeds children.
Familiarity breeds consent.
Familiarity breeds contempt - and children. Mark Twain
Familiarity breeds contemptand children. Mark Twain
Familiarity is a magician that is cruel to beauty but kind to ugliness. Ouida
Familiarity is the root of the closest friendships, as well as the intensest hatreds. Antoine Rivarol
Families with babies and families without babies are sorry for each other. Ed Howe
Family life is too intimate to be preserved by the spirit of justice. It can be sustained by a spirit of love which goes beyond justice. Reinhold Niebuhr
Famous Last Words #04:  "It's perfectly safe.  Let me show you."
Famous last words - Don't worry, I can handle it.
Famous last words - Icarus: Aaaahhhhhhhhh.
Famous last words - Jesus Christ: Father, beam me up.
Famous last words - Lion at the Circus of Rome: Burp..
Famous last words - You and what army?
Famous last words: "Hiyah, Captain BALDY!"
Fanatacism consists in redoubling your efforts when you have forgotten your aim. George Santayana
Fanatics have their dreams, wherewith they weave a paradise for a sect." | Keats
Fancy gizmos don't work.
Far and away the best prize that life offers is the chance to work hard at work worth doing. Theodore Roosevelt
Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure... than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in a grey twilight that knows not victory nor defeat. Theodore Roosevelt
Far duller than a serpent's tooth it is to spend a quiet youth.
Far more important to me is, that I should be loyal to what I regard as the law of my political life, which is this: a belief that that country is best governed, which is least governed ... George Hoadly
Farfignewton.. the cookie of the stars..
Farfignewton: n., from German, "ergonomic cookie"
Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil and you're a thousand miles from the cornfield., from an address at Peoria, IL 9/25/56 Dwight D. Eisenhower
Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months. Oscar Wilde
Fast ship?  You mean you've never heard of the Millennium Falcon?
Fasten your seat belt.
Faster cars, colder beer, younger women, more money!
Fat Wars: May the Sauce Be With You.
Fat generally tends to make a man a better husband. His wife is happy in the knowledge she is not married to a woman chaser. Few fat men chase girls, because they get winded too easily. Hal Boyle
Fat heads, lean brains.
Fat person: Nutritional Overachiever
Fatal Error Using Mouse. Replace and Bury Operator.
Fatal error : you're dead.
Fatal mouse error. (B)ury or (R)eplace?
Fate Protects fools, children and ships named Enterprise.
Fatigue is the best pillow. Benjamin Franklin
Fats Domino - the round of music
Faultily faultless, icily regular, splendidly null, dead perfection; no more. Alfred, Lord Tennyson
Faults are thick where love is thin.
Fax me no questions, I'll Fax you no lies
Fear follows crime, and is its punishment. Voltaire
Fear is the darkroom where negatives develop.
Fear is the parent of cruelty.
Fear is the tax that conscience pays to guilt.
Fear is your best weapon and your closest friend.
Fear kills more than the physician.
Fear less, hope more, eat less, chew more, whine less, breathe more, talk less, say more, hate less, love more, and all good things will be yours. Swedish proverb
Fear not a jest. If one throws salt at you, you will not be harmed unless you have sore places. Latin Proverb
Fear not, for I have given you authority.
Fear: when you see B8 00 4C CD 21 and you know what it means.
Feather by feather the goose is plucked.
Features should be discovered, not documented.
Feed your faith and starve your doubts to death.
Feel good ? Don't worry, you'll get over it !
Feel lucky???? Update your software!
Feeling Good? Don't worry; you'll get over it!
Feet Smell?  Nose Run?  Hey, you're upside down
Felines... nothing more than felines...
Fellow citizens, we cannot escape history. Abraham Lincoln
Fellow with closed mind often has open mouth.
Female programmers get their bits twiddled.
Females are nice to look at but Latinum is nicer.
Feminist bookstores have no humor section.
Fer sell cheep:  IBM spel chekker.  Wurks grate.
Few can stand prosperity... another's that is.
Few enterprises of great labor or hazard would be undertaken if we had not the power of magnifying the advantages we expect from them. Samuel Johnson
Few men during their lifetime come anywhere near exhausting the resources dwelling within them. There are deep wells of strength that are never used. Richard E. Byrd
Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder. George Washington
Few minds wear out; more rust out. Christian Nestell Bovee
Few of us can stand prosperity -- someone else's.
Few problems cannot be solved by proper application of high explosives.
Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example. Mark Twain
Few things are impossible to diligence and skill ... Great works are performed, not by strength, but perseverance. Samuel Johnson
Fewer things are harder to put up with that the annoyance of a good example.
Fiction: It can't hold a scandal to biography.
Fiddle: Friction of a horse's tail on a cat's entrails.
Fidelity is seven-tenths of business success. James Parton
Fidelity purchased with money, money can destroy. Seneca
Fidelity:  A virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
Fight War, Not Wars !
Fight the Greenhouse Effect:  PLANT TREES!!!
Fighting for peace is like f***ing for virginity
Figures won't lie, but liars will figure.
File Not Found. Loading something that looks similar.
File Not Found: (A)bort, (R)etry, (F)ake It?
File not found, I'll load something *I* think is interesting.
File not found, but if you'll hum a few bars...
File not found. Delete *.* and change directory? (Y/N)
File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)
File not found: Loading something that looked similar.
Files not found:  Delete user instead? (Y/y)?
Finagle's Law:  The perversity of the universe tends toward a maximum.
Financial sense is knowing that certain men will promise to do certain things, and fail. Ed Howe
Find me a one-armed economist so we'll not always hear "On the other hand".
Find out how many friends you have... rent a beach villa.
Find your aim in life, before you run out of ammunition
Fine = Tax for doing wrong. Tax = Fine for doing fine.
Fine, Fine...Have your Klingon servent get some chairs
Finite to fail, but infinite to venture. Emily Dickinson
Fire at Will  >ZAP<  THANK you Data...I mean, 'Number One'
Fire at will, Not at Will!
Firmness in politics is called obstinacy in a donkey.
Firmness of delivery dates is inversely proportional to tightness of schedule.
Firmness of purpose is one of the most necessary sinews of character, and one of the best instruments of success. Without it genius wastes its efforts in a maze of inconsistencies. Lord Chesterfield
First Shalt thou pull out the Holy Pin
First Shalt thou pull out the Holy Pin!
First ask yourself: What is the worst that can happen? Then prepare to accept it. Then proceed to improve on the worst. Dale Carnegie
First deserve, and then desire. English Proverb
First draw the curves, then plot the data.
First impressions are the most lasting.
First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity. George Bernard Shaw, english playwrite
First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity: no really self-respecting woman would take advantage of it. George Bernard Shaw
First secure an independent income, then practice virtue. Greek Proverb
First they take your money, then your clothes.
First thing you do is shoot all the lawyers
First things first, but not necessarily in that order. Doctor Who, fictional english SF character
First, learn the meaning of what you say, and then speak. Epictetus
Fish and guests smell in three days.
Fish and visitors stink in three days.
Fish and visitors stink in three days. -- Poor Richard.
Fish are so hard to toilet train.
Fish or cut bait. American Proverb
Fishing is a delusion surrounded by liars in old clothes.
Fishing rod: a hook at one end, a fool at the other.
Five great enemies to peace inhabit with us: viz., avarice, ambition, envy, anger and pride. If those enemies were to be banished, we should infallibly enjoy perpetual peace. Petrarch
Flames to dev/null/here/is/a/quarter/now/go/buy/a/clue.
Flaming nuclear death to Smurfs
Flattery is a kind of bad money, to which our vanity gives us currency. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Flattery is all right as long as you don't inhale.
Flattery is counterfeit money, circulated by vanity.
Flattery is from the teeth out. Sincere appreciation is from the heart out. Dale Carnegie
Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt of, not swallowed. Josh Billings
Flattery is the sincerest form of lying.
Flattery: Cologne water, to smell but not swallow.
Flee at once, all is discovered.
Flirt: A woman who thinks it's every man for herself.
Floggings will continue until morale improves.
Floppy disk - A disk that flops
Floppy not responding--formatting HDD!
Floppy not responding. Format hard drive instead? (Y/N)
Florence of Arabia -- feminist camelmanship
Fly By Nighters often hit tall buildings.
Flying is the art of throwing yourself at the ground... and missing
Fnord.
Folks who think they know it all bug those of us who do
Follow the good side right to the fire, but not into it.
Follow the wise few rather than the vulgar many.
Fonts and Typefaces : the more the merrier !
Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
Food will be scarce; you will have to scavenge.  Learn to recognize foods that will be available after the bomb: mashed potatoes, shredded wheat, tossed salad, ground beef, etc. | Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
Fools admire, but men of sense approve. Alexander Pope
Fools build houses. Wise Ferengi buy them.
Fools grow without watering. Thomas Fuller
Fools make feasts and wise men eat them. -- Poor Richard.
Fools rush in -- and get the best seats.
Fools rush in where angels fear to tread. Alexander Pope
Fools rush in where fools have been before.
Fools rush in wherever lottery tickets are sold
Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by committee meetings. George F. Will, journalist, political commentator, 1994
Football is a game that requires the constant conjuring of animosity., New York Times, 12/10/67 Vince Lombardi
Football is like life - it requires perserverence, self-denial, hard work, sacrifice, dedication and respect for authority. Vince Lombardi
Football's a funny game.
Football's a game of 90 minutes.
For God's sake, give me the young man who has brains enough to make a fool of himself. Robert Louis Stevenson
For I would rather be a servant in the House of the Lord than to sit in the seats of the mighty. Alben W. Barkley
For NASA, space is still a high priority. | Vice President Dan Quayle
For New Year's, I gave up sex & lying.
For New Year's, I gave up sex and lying.
For Sale: Dehydrated HO - $14 per quart
For Sale: Slightly used message. Enquire within.
For a REAL sponge cake, BORROW all the ingredients.
For a good time, call (408) 555-1212.
For a photographer, life us just a bed of poses.
For adult education nothing beats children.
For after all, the best thing one can do when it's raining is to let it rain. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
For all the sad words of tongue or pen, The saddest are these: 'It might have been!' -John Greenleaf Whittier, from Maud Muller
For all you do, this SCUD's for you.
For anything worth having one must pay the price; and the price is always work, patience, love, self-sacrifice. John Burroughs
For anything worth having one must pay the price; and the price is always work, patience, love, self-sacrificeno paper currency, no promises to pay, but the gold of real service. John Burroughs
For at the end of history lies the undiscovered country.
For best results, squeeze from the bottom of the tube.
For courage mounteth with occasion.
For discussion only. Not to be relied upon.
For every action there is an equal and opposite government program. Main's Law
For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
For every action, there's a = govt. agency.
For every benefit you receive a tax is levied. Ralph Waldo Emerson
For every problem, there is a neat, simple solution : it is always wrong.
For every problem, there is a neat, simple, wrong solution.
For every talent that poverty has stimulated it has blighted a hundred. John W. Gardner
For every vision there is an equal and opposite revision.
For every vision, there is an equal and opposite revision.
For everything you have missed you have gained something. Ralph Waldo Emerson
For fast acting relief, try slowing down. Lily Tomlin
For fools rush in where angels fear to tread.
For glory gives herself only to those who have always dreamed of her. Charles de Gaulle
For if Freedom and Communism were to compete for man's allegiance in a world at peace, I would look to the future with ever increasing confidence. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
For most men life is a search for the proper manilla envelope in which to get themselves filed. Clifton Fadiman
For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier...I put them in the same room and let them fight it out. Stephen Wright
For myself I am an optimistit does not seem to be much use being anything else. Winston Churchill
For of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: 'It might have been!' John Greenleaf Whittier
For people who like that kind of book, that is the kind of book they will like.
For sale, Toilet-seat cover.  Barely used.
For success today, look first to yourself.
For the American people are a very generous people and will forgive almost any weakness, with the possible exception of stupidity. Will Rogers
For the finest in brain candy.
For the love of god folks, don't do this at home. David Letterman, CBS Late Show, demonstrating the Donut-o-pult, 1995
For the moment. This baby's working. * O'Brien
For the most part fraud in the end secures for its companions repentance and shame. Charles Simmons
For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack. Rudyard Kipling
For the want of a nail the shoe was lost, For the want of a shoe the horse was lost, For the want of a horse the rider was lost, For the want of a rider the battle was lost, For the want of a battle the kingdom was lost, And all for the want of a horse-shoe nail. Benjamin Franklin
For thee the wonder working earth puts forth sweet flowers.
For this is what America is all about. It is the uncrossed desert and the unclimbed ridge. It is the star that is not reached and the harvest that's sleeping in the unplowed ground. Lyndon Baines Johnson
For those of you who think life is a joke, just think of the punchline.
For tomorrow I diet . . .
For what avail the plough or sail, Or land or life, if freedom fail? Ralph Waldo Emerson
For when the One Great Scorer comes to mark against your name, He writesnot that you won or lostbut how you played the Game. Grantland Rice
For your penance, say five Hail Marys and one loud BLAH
For your penance, say five Hail Marys and one loud BLAH!
Forbid a man to think for himself or to act for himself and you may add the joy of piracy and the zest of smuggling to his life. Elbert Hubbard
Force has no place where there is need of skill.
Force is all-conquering, but its victories are short-lived. Abraham Lincoln
Force is not a remedy. John Bright
Force rules the world, and not opinion; but opinion is that which makes use of force. Blaise Pascal
Ford, you're turning into a penguin. Stop it.
Fore-think, though you cannot fore-tell.
Forget Others' faults by remembering your own.
Forget PRIME DIRECTIVES! Give the BORG Windows!
Forget RTFM - Call The Author At Home!
Forget everything, as one day everything will forget you.
Forget injuries, never forget kindnesses. Chinese Proverb
Forget patience! I'm gonna kill something...
Forget the Joneses... I can't keep up with The Simpsons !
Forget the computer!  Where's my abacus??
Forget the past and live the present hour. Sarah Knowles Bolton
Forgive many things in others; nothing in yourself. Ausonius
Forgive your enemies but never forget their names.
Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee And I'll forgive Thy great big one on me. Robert Frost
Forgive, but never forget. John F. Kennedy
Format C:<CR>......OOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPSSSS!
Format all 10?  Only 3 fit in the slot.
Formatting Drive C:      Press      to abort...
Fort Wayne is not the headquarters of F troop.
Fortes fortuna adjuvat
Fortinlee, I downt nead a spel checkr.
Fortunately, the second-to-last bug has just been fixed. | Ray Simard
Fortune befriends the bold. John Dryden
Fortune favors the bold. Virgil
Fortune is a great deceiver. She sells very dear the things she seems to give us. Vincent Voiture
Fortune is ever seen accompanying industry. Oliver Goldsmith
Fortune is the rod of the weak, and the staff of the brave. James Russell Lowell
Fortune knocks at every man's door once in a life, but in a good many cases the man is in a neighboring saloon and does not hear her. Mark Twain
Fortune truly helps those who are of good judgment.
Fortune vomits on my eiderdown yet again.
Fortunes made in no time are like shirts made in no time; it's ten to one if they hang long together. Douglas Jerrold
Fountains mingle with the river, rivers with the ocean.
Four Food Groups: Beer, Chips, Chocolate, Pretzels.
Four and six a pound and him with a wooden leg?
Four be the things I am wiser to know: Idleness, sorrow, a friend, and a foe. Dorothy Parker
Four food groups: Fast, Frozen, Instant & Microwavable.
Four minus two is one and the same.
Four out five people think the fifth is an idiot.
Four things come not back: the spoken word, the spent arrow, the past, the neglected opportunity. Omar Idn Al-Halif
Frankly, my dear Charlotte, I don't give a damn.
Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn : C. Gable
Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn...
Fraud(n): A telephone number starting with "1-900"
Free Nelson Mandela, while stocks last!
Free advice is seldom cheap.....and even moreso when from a Ferengi.
Free advice is worth what you pay for it
Free people, remember this maxim: we may acquire liberty, but it is never recovered if it is once lost. Jean Jacques Rousseau
Free the Indianapolis 500.
Freedom Freedom suppressed and again regained bites with keener fangs than freedom never endangered. Cicero
Freedom from effort in the present merely means that there has been effort stored up in the past. Theodore Roosevelt
Freedom is a hard-bought thing - A gift no man can give.
Freedom is doing what you like, happiness liking what you do.
Freedom is just chaos with better lighting.
Freedom is not an ideal, it is not even a protection, if it means nothing more than the freedom to stagnate. Adlai E. Stevenson
Freedom is not worth having if it does not connote freedom to err. Mahatma Gandhi
Freedom is nothing else but a chance to be better. Albert Camus
Freedom is slavery.  Ignorance is strength.  War is peace.
Freedom isn't cheap and it never goes on sale.
Freedom of religion is also freedom FROM religion. . .
Freedom rings where opinions clash. Adlai E. Stevenson
Friction is a drag.
Friday means two more working days 'til Monday.
Friend: Anyone who has the same enemies you have.
Friendly fire - ISN'T !
Friendly fire isn't. Murphy's Second Military Law
Friends Come And Go, But Relatives Never Leave.....
Friends are Friends, regardless of their baud rate!
Friends are people you can be quiet with.
Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.
Friends come and go, enemies accumulate.
Friends don't let friends use Windoze.
Friends don't let friends use XMODEM
Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
Friends, I agree with you in Providence; but I believe in the Providence of the most men, the largest purse, and the longest cannon. Abraham Lincoln
Friends, Romans, Countrymen: lend me your noses
Friends: people who borrow my books and set wet glasses on them.
Friendship Never Explainyour Friends do not need it and your Enemies will not believe you anyway. Elbert Hubbard
Friendship is almost always the union of a part of one mind with a part of another: people are friends in spots. George Santayana
Friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity. Kahlil Gibran
Friendship is neither a formality nor a mode: it is rather a life. David Grayson
Friendship is one mind in two bodies. Mencius
Friendship is one soul in two bodies.
Friendship with ones self is all important, because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world. Eleanor Roosevelt
Friendship without self-interest is one of the rare and beautiful things of life. James F. Byrnes
Friendship, of itself a holy tie, Is made more sacred by adversity. Charles Caleb Colton
Friendships are not always preserved in alcohol.
Frink!
Frisbee players are ultimate lovers.
Frisbyterian: when you die, your soul goes up on the roof.
Frog philosophy: Time's fun when you're having flies!
From listening comes wisdom and from speaking repentance.
From listening comes wisdom; from speaking, repentance.
From my brain, an organ with a mind of it's own.
From principles is derived probability, but truth or certainty is obtained only from facts. Nathaniel Hawthorne
From such crooked wood as that which man is made of, nothing straight can be fashioned. Immanuel Kant
From the Department of Redundancy Dept.
From the body of one guilty deed a thousand ghostly fears and haunting thoughts proceed. William Wordsworth
From the end of the nose of the Buddha on the moor, hang icicles. Issa
From the equality of rights springs identity of our highest interests; you cannot subvert your neighbor's rights without striking a dangerous blow at your own. Carl Schurz
From the land of graft and corruption!
From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it. Groucho Marx
From the withered tree, a flower blooms. Zen Saying
Frostbite Falls Minnesota, home of Watsa Matta U.
Fruit flies like a banana.
Fuck!  Shit! Damn! I'll kill them if they come!  Hell yes I'll fight!  I'll fight!
Fudd's First Law:  "If you push something hard enough, it will fall over."
Fun, fun, fun till her daddy takes the modem away ...
Function reject.
Fungus trellis | From "101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR"
Funny you should mention that, I was a gynecologist once.|Pick up line
Funny, only sensible people agree with me.
Fuss, the god of the Southern Ocean, and Fret, the god of the Northern Ocean, happened once to meet in the realm of Chaos, the god of the Center. Chaos treated them very well and they discussed how to repay him. They had noticed that, where everyone Chaung-Tzu
Future looks spotty.  You will spill soup in late evening.
Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happinesss is assured. Ambrose Bierce, (1842,1914)
Fuzzy project goals avoid the embarrassment of estimating the costs.
G=Guns, PG=Plenty of Guns, PG-13=More than 12 guns...
GATTUSO'S EXTENSION OF MURPHY'S LAW: Nothing is ever so bad that it can't get worse.
GATTUSO'S EXTENSION: Nothing is ever so bad that it can't get worse.
GET A HAIRCUT!
GILLENSON'S LAW OF EXPECTATION: Never get excited over how people look from behind.
GIVE: Support the helpless victims of computer error.
GLYME'S FORMULA: The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made.
GOD is real .. unless declared integer.
GODISNOWHERE
GOEBEL'S LAW OF RUSH HOUR TRAFFIC: What speeds up, must slow down. But who says it's ever gonna speed up?
GOLD'S LAW: If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
GOLFER--Yells "Fore", Takes Five, Writes Down Three.
GORP [from a type of dried hikers' and bikers food, itself an acronym for Good Old Raisins and Peanuts] Another metasyntactic variable, like FOO & BAR.
GOSUB:coffee;work;RETURN:
GROSSMAN'S LEMMA: Any task worth doing was worth doing yesterday.
GROSSMAN'S MISQUOTE OF H.L.MENCKEN: Complex problems have simple, easy-to-understand wrong answers.
GUI : Grab the User In-the-face.
GUMPERSON'S LAW: The probability of anything happening is in inverse ratio to its desirability.
GURU: One who knows more jargon than you.
Gaffa tape is like the force: It has a light side and a dark side.
Gain cannot be made without some other person's loss. Publilius Syrus
Gain gotten by a lie will burn one's fingers.
Gallantry of the mind is saying the most empty things in an agreeable manner. Franois de la Rochefoucauld
Gallantry to womenthe sure road to their favoris nothing but the appearance of extreme devotion to all their wants and wishes, a delight in their satisfaction, and a confidence in yourself as being able to contribute toward it. William Hazlitt
Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something.
Gambling: a way of getting nothing for something.
Garfle, ni belquont; delberpho wifniel
Gargle twice daily - see if your neck leaks.
Gargling twice daily is a good way to see if your neck leaks.
Garlic is to salad what insanity is to art.
Gary Trudeau for President!
Gee Wiz, I didn't know DOS is that stupid
Gee, I wonder what this key does.
Gee, you don't sweat much for a fat chick.|Pick up line
Gene Police: YOU! Out of the pool.
Genealogy. Tracing descent from someone who didn't.
Genealogy: Tracing us back to the same brother and sister.
Geneology: chasing your own tale.
General Failure reading John Dvorak
General Failure reading drive A:  Please remove your fist.
General failure reading drive A: Please remove your fist.
Generally when there's a lot of smoke...there's just a whole lot more smoke. George Foreman, boxer and sports comentator, before a fight between Riddick Bowe and Hector Gonzales, 1995
Generic Brown Label Tagline
Generic Industry Standard Tagline
Generic Tagline
Generosity and perfection are your everlasting goals.
Generosity during life is a very different thing from generosity in the hour of death; one proceeds from genuine liberality and benevolence, the other from pride or fear. Horace Mann
Generosity is giving more than you can, and pride is taking less than you need. Kahlil Gibran
Genitalia is not an Italian airline.
Genius begins great works; labor alone finishes them. Joseph Joubert
Genius does what it must, and talent does what it can. Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton
Genius has its limits, but not stupidity.
Genius is 1 inspiration and 99 perspiration.
Genius is 10 percent inspiration and 50 percent capital gains.
Genius is an infinite capacity for taking life by the scruff of the neck. Christopher Quill
Genius is entitled to respect only when it promotes the peace and improves the happiness of mankind. Lord Essex
Genius is one per cent inspiration and ninety-nine per cent perspiration. Thomas A. Edison
Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration.| Thomas Alva Edison
Genius is one percent inspiration and ninty-nine percent perspiration. Thomas Alva Edison
Genius is the ability to act rightly without precedentthe power to do the right thing the first time. Elbert Hubbard
Genius is the talent of a man who is dead.
Genius starts at the top and works up.
Genius without education is like silver in the mine. Benjamin Franklin
Genius: One who can do anything except earn a living.
Genius: One who tries to convince people *they* are correct.
Gentle Reader: Please list some decent ways of acquiring a man's saliva on your face ...
Gentleman: one who can play bagpipes but chooses not to.
Gentlemen's agreements can get very ungentlemanly.
Gentlemen, start your debuggers...
Geologist -- Fault finder
Geometer turned general - a sphereless leader.
Geometry: what the acorn said after it grew up.
George Bush: 'A New World Odor!'
George Carlin An economist is a surgeon with an excellent scalpel and a rough-edged lancet, who operates beautifully on the dead and tortures the living. Nicholas Chamfort
George Orwell was an optimist.
Georgia REALLY sucks.
Get Revenge  Live long enough to be a problem for your children
Get a powerful right arm: subscribe to Playboy.
Get a sun lamp to keep you looking as if you have just come back from somewhere expensive. Aristotle Onassis
Get action. Seize the moment. Man was never intended to become an oyster. Theodore Roosevelt
Get behind early so you have plenty of time to catch up.
Get down and Modem the night away!
Get even...With the people that have helped you.
Get money first, virtue comes afterward.
Get off my kitchen floor...will ya
Get out of my way, and keep quiet. * Picard
Get out the Crisco.
Get someone else to blow your horn and the sound will carry twice as far. Will Rogers
Get stoned! Drink wet cement!
Get the facts first - you can distort them later!
Get the facts first. You can distort them later. Mark Twain
Get the facts, or the facts will get you. And when you get 'em, get 'em right, or they will get you wrong. Thomas Fuller
Get together a hundred or two men, however sensible they may be, and you are very likely to have a mob. Samuel Johnson
Get what you can and keep what you have; that's the way to get rich. Scottish Proverb
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please. Mark Twain
Get your facts first, then you can distort them as much as you please.
Get your grubby hands off my tagline I stole it first
Get your kicks...
Get your modem runnin, Head out for the Highwaves!
Getting a second chance is never a certainty.
Getting caught is the mother of invention.
Getting people to like you is merely the other side of liking them. The Power of Positive Thinking
Getting talked about is one of the penalties for being pretty, while being above suspicion is about the only compensation for being homely. Kin Hubbard
Getting to the top isn't bad, and it's probably best done as an afterthought. Anne Wilson Shaef
Ghosts are merely unsubstantiated roomers.
Gimme a hamburger, with cheese, bacon & onion. Chips and Coke.| Con
Gimme back my face! You're getting it ugly.
Gimme, gimme, gimme more donuts....| Elvis
Girl, bathing on Bikini, eyeing boy, finds boy eyeing bikini on bathing girl.
Girls seldom show dimples to boys who have pimples.
Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Chinese Proverb
Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish. Timothy Jones
Give a man an inch, and he thinks he's a ruler.
Give a speculator an inch and he'll build a condo.
Give a woman an inch  and she'll park a car in it.
Give a woman an inch and she thinks she's a ruler.
Give a woman an inch and she'll (try to) park a car in it.
Give a woman an inch and she'll park a car in it.
Give big space to the festive dog that shall sport in the roadway.
Give him an evasive answer.
Give it to Riker- he'll eat anything
Give me Slack.  Or give me food.  Or kill me.
Give me a fish and I will eat today.  Teach me to fish and I will eat forever.
Give me a productive error over a boring, mundane and unproductive fact any day. Anon.
Give me all the luxuries of life & I can dispense with the necessities.
Give me all your lupins
Give me all your lupins!
Give me chastity and continence, but not just now.
Give me matter, and I will construct a world out of it! Immanuel Kant
Give me one friend, just one, who meets The needs of all my varying moods. Esther M. Clark
Give me patience! RIGHT NOW!
Give me the ready hand rather than the ready tongue. Giuseppe Garibaldi
Give them all they want, and all they will want is more.
Give to a pig when it grunts and a child when it cries, and you will have a fine pig and a bad child. Danish Proverb
Give to us clear vision that we may know where to stand and what to stand forbecause unless we stand for something, we shall fall for anything. Peter Marshall
Give up.
Give us the luxuries of life and we will dispense with the necessities. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Give us the luxuries of life and we'll dispense with the necessaries. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Give your child mental blocks for Christmas.
Given any problem containing 'n' equations, there will always be n+1 unknowns.
Given my druthers, I'd druther not.
Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them good. H. L. Mencken
Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them good. H.L. Mencken
Glory built on selfish principles, is shame and guilt. William Cowper
Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever...
Glory is the shadow of virtue. Latin Proverb
Glory may be fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
Glory paid to our ashes comes too late. Martial
Glutton: one who digs his grave with his teeth. French Proverb
Gnaw the bone which has fallen to thy lot.
Go Ahead.. We're cleared for wierd.
Go For It!
Go Lemmings, Go!!!
Go Speed Racer, go Speed Racer, go Speed Racer, go
Go Speed Racer, go Speed Racer, go Speed Racer, go!!!
Go ahead and steal my tagline : it flatters me.
Go ahead, back up to the RAM disk.  I dare you
Go ahead, back up to the RAM disk. I dare you !
Go ahead, jump. 100,000 lemmings can't be wrong.
Go ahead...MAKE MY DOWNLOAD!!!
Go and boil your bottoms, son of a silly person!
Go away, kid.  You bother me.
Go away.
Go away. I'm all right. H.G. Wells, last words
Go not to the elves for advice, for they will say both yes and no. -- Tolkien.
Go often to the house of a friend; for weeds soon choke up the unused path. Scandanavian Proverb
Go on, just hit me! ...Name:Esc, #:27, Rank:UL..
Go softly... It's dark out there.
Go soothingly in the grease mud, as there lurks the skid demon.
Go straight to the docs.  Do not pass GO.  Do not collect $200!
God God never made His work for man to mend. John Dryden
God I hate floppies.
God I want patience, and I WANT IT NOW!
God appoints our graces to be nurses to other men's weaknesses. Henry Ward Beecher
God bears with the wicked, but not forever. Miguel de Cervantes
God cannot alter the past, but historians can. Samuel Butler
God could not be everywhere and therefore he made mothers. Jewish Proverb
God could not be everywhere, and therefore he made mothers. Jewish Proverb
God created man in His own image, says the Bible; philosophers reverse the process: they create God in theirs. G. C. Lichtenberg
God does not play dice with the universe.
God does not play dice.
God does not play dice.| Albert Einstein
God enters by a private door into every individual. Ralph Waldo Emerson
God gave teeth; He will give bread. Lithuanian Proverb
God give me the serenity to accept things which cannot be changed; Give me courage to change things which must be changed; And the wisdom to distinguish one from the other. Reinhold Niebuhr
God gives quietness at last. John Greenleaf Whittier
God gives us our relatives; thank God we can choose our friends.
God gives us relatives; thank God we can chose our friends.
God hangs the greatest weights upon the smallest wires. Francis Bacon
God has always been hard on the poor.
God has no intention of setting a limit to the efforts of man to conquer space. Pius XII
God has no place within these walls, just as facts have no place within organized religion. Homer Simpson (#100, 1994)
God heals and the doctor takes the fee.
God heals and the doctor takes the fee. -- Poor Richard.
God heals and the doctor takes the fee. Benjamin Franklin
God hears no more than the heart speaks; and if the heart be dumb, God will certainly be deaf. Thomas Brooks
God help the man who won't marry until he finds a perfect woman, and God help him still more if he finds her. Benjamin Tillett
God helps them that help themselves. Proverb
God invented women because sheep can't cook.
God is Dead -- Nietzsche. Nietzsche is Dead -- God. Nietzsche is God -- The (Grateful) Dead
God is REAL (unless declared INTEGER).
God is REAL unless declared INTEGER.
God is alive - he just doesn't want to get involved.
God is clever, but not dishonest. Albert Einstein
God is everywhere...but "Bob" has already BEEN everywhere else.
God is love...  Love is blind...  Ray Charles is God!
God is more truly imagined than expressed, and He exists more truly than He is imagined. Saint Augustine
God is not a cosmic bell-boy for whom we can press a button to get things. Harry Emerson Fosdick
God is not dead  He's alive and autographing bibles at Cody's
God is real, unless declared integer.
God is really only another artist.  He invented the giraffe, the elephant and the cat.  He has no real style, He just goes on trying other things. | Pablo Picasso
God is the brave man's hope, and not the coward's excuse. Plutarch
God is the tangential point between zero and infinity. | Alfred Jarry
God isn't dead, he just couldn't find a parking place.
God made an idiot for practice, and then He made a school board. -- Mark Twain.
God made machine language; all the rest is the work of man.
God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board | Mark Twain
God made the country and man made the town. William Cowper
God made the integers; all else is the work of Man.
God made the integers; all else is the work of Man. | Kronecker
God made the world in six days, and was arrested on the seventh.
God made whiskey so the Irish wouldn't rule the world.
God made whisky to keep the Irish from ruling the world !
God may be subtle, but He isn't plain mean. | Albert Einstein
God may be subtle, but he isn't plain mean.
God moves in a mysterious way, His wonders to perform; He plants his footsteps in the sea, And rides upon the storm. William Cowper
God must love the comman man, he made so many of them.| Abraham Lincoln
God must love the common man; He made so many of them.
God never built a Christian strong enough to carry today's duties and tomorrow's anxieties piled on the top of them. Theodore Ledyard Cuyler
God pardons like a mother who kisses the offense into everlasting forgetfulness. Henry Ward Beecher
God sends us meat, the devil sends us cooks. Proverb
God's finger touched him, and he slept. Alfred, Lord Tennyson
God's in his heaven, all's right with the world.
God's providence is on the side of clear heads. Henry Ward Beecher
God, as some cynic has said, is always on the side which has the best football coach. Heywood Broun
Going out of my mind, back in 5 minutes.
Going tagless has been a freeing experience
Going the speed of light is bad for your age.
Going to church does not make a person religious, nor does going to school make a person educated, any more than going to a garage makes a person a car.
Going to fly?  Walk, you'll get there faster
Gold has worked down from Alexander's time ... When something holds good for two thousand years I do not believe it can be so because of prejudice or mistaken theory. Bernard M. Baruch
Gold like the sun, which melts wax, but hardens clay, expands great souls. Antoine Rivarol
Gold will be slave or master. Horace
Gold's father is dirt, yet it regards itself as noble. Yiddish Proverb
Gold, n.: A soft malleable metal relatively scarce in distribution. It is mined deep in the earth by poor men who then give it to rich men who immediately bury it back in the earth in great prisons, although gold hasn't done anything to them. | Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"
Golden Rule : she who has the gold makes the rules.
Goldenstern's Rules: 1.  Always hire a rich attorney 2.  Never buy from a rich salesman.
Golfer: A person who hits and tells.
Gone crazy; be back later; leave message.
Good actions ennoble us, and we are the sons of our own deeds. Miguel de Cervantes
Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example. | La Rouchefoucauld
Good advice is something you give when you're too old to set a bad example.
Good afternoon, Tech Pacific, Tara speaking...| Tara
Good clothes open all doors. Thomas Fuller
Good communicationation is just as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. Anne Morrow Lingbergh
Good day for a change of scene.  Repaper the bedroom wall.
Good day for flying but bad day for landings....
Good day for overcoming obstacles.  Try a steeplechase.
Good day to avoid cops.  Crawl to school.
Good day to let down old friends who need help.
Good evening ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the universal amphitheater.
Good fences make good neighbors. American Proverb
Good fortune will find you, providing you gave directions.
Good girls go to heaven...but bad girls go EVERYWHERE!!
Good government is no substitute for self-government. Mahatma Gandhi
Good habits result from resisting temptation. Ancient Proverb
Good habits, which bring our lower passions and appetites under automatic control, leave our natures free to explore the larger experiences of life. Too many of us divide and dissipate our energies in debating actions which should be taken for granted Ralph W. Sockman
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Good health will be yours for a long time.
Good hours, excellent pay, fun place to work, paid training, mean boss. Oh well, four out of five isn't bad. Help Wanted Ad, PA newspaper, 1994
Good humor is one of the best articles of dress one can wear in society. William Makepeace Thackeray
Good humor is the health of the soul, sadness the poison.
Good humor isn't a trait of character, it is an art which requires practice. David Seabury
Good judgment comes from experience; experience comes from bad judgment.
Good leaders being scarce, following yourself is allowed.
Good luck is a lazy man's estimate of a worker's success.
Good luck is a lazy man's estimate of a worker's success. Anonymous
Good management is the art of getting other people to do all the work.
Good manners are made up of petty sacrifices. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Good men must die, but death cannot kill their names. Proverb
Good men must die, but death cannot kill their names. Spanish Proverb
Good news from afar can bring you a welcome visitor.
Good news is just life's way of keeping you off balance.
Good news.  Ten weeks from Friday will be a good day.
Good news.  Ten weeks from Friday will be a pretty good day.
Good night to spend with family, but avoid arguments with your mate's new lover.
Good night, Mrs. Calabash, wherever you are.
Good printers do it without wrinkling the sheets.
Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account. Oscar Wilde
Good taste is the excuse I've always given for leading such a bad life. Oscar Wilde
Good taste is the flower of good sense.
Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theatre. Gail Godwin
Good temper is an estate for life. William Hazlitt
Good will is a weapon against which there is no defense.
Good will, like a good name, is got by many actions, and lost by one. Lord Jeffrey
Good wine ruins the purse and bad wine ruins the stomach.
Good words cost no more than bad.
Good words cost nothing, but they don't make a profit.
Good-bye.  I am leaving because I am bored. | George Saunders' dying words
GoodMoaning.
Goodness has NOTHING to do with it.....
Goodness shouts. Evil whispers. Balinese Proverb
Goodness speaks in a whisper, evil shouts. Tibetan proverb
Gossip is always a personal confession either of malice or imbecility. Josiah Gilbert Holland
Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way that leaves practically nothing unsaid. Walter Winchell
Got Kleptomania? Take something for it!
Got Mole problem? Call Avogadro at 6.02 X 10^23.
Got Mole problems? Call Avogardo 6.02 x 10^23
Got a DEATH WISH? Join STARFLEET SECURITY today!
Got arrested for going 14400 in a 2400 zone.
Got run, my cat got stuck in the printer...
Goto, n.: A programming tool that exists to allow structured programmers to complain about unstructured programmers. | Ray Simard
Gotta have my Corn Pops...
Gotta love me!
Government You can't run a government solely on a business basis ... Government should be human. It should have a heart. Herbert Henry Lehman
Government expands to absorb revenue and then some. Wiker's Law
Government is a kind of legalized pillage. Elbert Hubbard
Grabel's Law: 2 is not equal to 3 -- not even for large values of 2.
Grace is savage and must be savage in order to be perfect. Charles A. Stoddard
Grace is to the body, what good sense is to the mind. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Gracefulness has been defined to be the outward expression of the inward harmony of the soul. William Hazlitt
Graduate life -- it's not just a job, it's an indenture.
Graduate of the Darth Vader School of Personnel Management.
Graduate, Whatsamatta U. School of Management
Graffiti has changed deface of the nation.
Grafitti have changed deface of the nation.
Graham's Law - graham crackers are good for making laws
Grandma got run over by a reindeer...
Grandpa Charnock's Law: You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
Grape nuts? I didn't know grapes had nuts.
Grass is nature's way of saying "high"
Gratitude is a duty which ought to be paid, but which none have a right to expect. Jean Jacques Rousseau
Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others. Cicero
Gratitude is one of the least articulate of the emotions, especially when it is deep. Felix Frankfurter
Gratitude is one of those things that cannot be bought. It must be born with men, or else all the obligations in the world will not create it. Lord Halifax
Gratitude is the fairest blossom which springs from the soul. Henry Ward Beecher
Gratitude is the heart's memory. French Proverb
Graveyards are full of the indispensable.
Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love. Albert Einstein
Gravity : it's not just a good idea, it's the law !
Gravity brings me down.
Gravity doesn't exist.  The Earth sux.
Gravity is a law.  Lawbreakers will be brought down!
Gravity is a myth -- the Earth sucks.
Gravity is a myth. The Earth sucks.
Gravity is a trick of the body devised to conceal deficiencies of the mind. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Gravity is only the bark of wisdom; but it preserves it. Confucius
Gravity: it's not just a good idea, it's the law!
Gray hair is a sign of age, not of wisdom. Greek Proverb
Gray hairs are death's blossoms. English Proverb
Gray's Law of Programming: `_n+1' trivial tasks are expected to be accomplished in the same time as `_n' tasks.
Great Britain and the United States are nations separated by a common language. George Bernard Shaw
Great Opportunities to help others seldom come, but small ones surround us every day. Sally Koch
Great discoveries and improvements invariably involve the cooperation of many minds. I may be given credit for having blazed the trail but when I look at the subsequent developments I feel the credit is due to others rather than to myself. Alexander Graham Bell
Great green gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts
Great hopes make great men.
Great intellects are skeptical. Friederich Nietzsche
Great is the difference betwixt a man's being frightened at, and humbled for his sins. Thomas Fuller
Great is this organism of mud and fire, terrible this vast, painful, glorious experiment. George Santayana
Great joy, especially after a sudden change of circumstances, is apt to be silent, and dwells rather in the heart than on the tongue. Henry Fielding
Great literature is simply language charged with meaning to the utmost possible degree. Ezra Pound
Great men are not always wise.
Great men are they who see that the spiritual is stronger than any material force. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Great minds discuss ideas ; small ones, people.
Great minds have purposes, others have wishes. Washington Irving
Great minds travel in the same sewers.
Great oaks from little acorns grow Proverb
Great souls endure in silence. Friedrich Schiller
Great souls have wills; feeble ones have only wishes. Chinese Proverb
Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.|Albert Einstein
Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition, from mediocre minds.| Albert Einstein
Great thoughts reduced to practice become great acts. William Hazlitt
Greatness is a transitory experience.  It is never consistent.
Greed captures the essence of the evolutionary spirit.
Greed is good!  Greed is right!  Greed works!
Greed is good, greed works.
Green light in A.M. for new projects.  Red light in P.M. for traffic tickets.
Greener's Law: Never argue with a man who buys ink by the barrel.
Greenhouse, schmeenhouse -- I'm FREEZING!
Grelb's Commentary Likelihoods, however, are 90% against you.
Grelb's Reminder: Eighty percent of all people consider themselves to be above average drivers.
Grief is the agony of an instant; the indulgence of grief the blunder of a life. Benjamin Disraeli
Groebe's Law: The more complex the problem, the sooner the deadline.
Ground water? Do you mean crushed ice?
Ground yourself, THEN hug your motherboard
Group Photo
Grow angry slowly; there's plenty of time.
Grow your own Dope - Plant a Politician.
Grow your own dope...   plant a man
Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional.
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional
Growing old is no more than a bad habit which a busy man has no time to form. Andr Maurois
Growing older is mandatory... growing up is optional!
Grub first, then ethics.
Grudnuk demand sustenance!
Guess what I made for dinner?  Reservations!
Guess who's coming to dinner.  | Chekov
Guest, like fish, begin to smell after three days.| Benjamin Franklin
Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days. Benjamin Franklin
Guidelines for Bureaucrats: 1. When in charge, ponder. 2. When in trouble-delegate. 3. When in doubt, mumble. James H. Borden
Guilt is always jealous. John Ray
Guilt is the source of sorrow, 'tis the fiend-Th' avenging fiend, that follows us behindWith whips and stings. Nicholas Rowe
Guilt once harbored in the conscious breast, intimidates the brave, degrades the great. Samuel Johnson
Guinan's secret power:  her hat is a solar panel.
Gun Control means holding it in both hands.
Gun Control: Keep muzzle pointed at target.
Gun control : keep the muzzle pointed at the target.
Gun control is hitting what you aim at.
Gun control:  Keep the muzzle pointed at the target.
Guns don't kill people... death does.
Guns don't kill people..., I KILL PEOPLE!
Guns don't kill. Fast-moving projectiles do.
Guten TAG.
Guts: putting the name "SYSOP" in your twit filter.
H lp!  S m b d  st l  ll th  v w ls fr m m  k yb  rd!
H y! Wh r  did my " " k y go?
H*LL WITH THE EVIDENCE : it's politically correct !
H. L. Mencken's Law: Those who can -- do. Those who can't -- teach. Martin's Extension: Those who cannot teach -- administrate.
HA I kill me
HADLEY'S LAW OF CLOTHING: If you like it, they don't have it in your size.
HAL 9000, you're pretty drunk aren't you Dave?
HAMILTON'S GLASS CLEANING LAW: The spot you are scrubbing is always on the other side.
HANGOVER: A self-inflicted wound. Anonymous
HANLON'S RAZOR: Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.
HARDWARE: n. The part you kick.
HARDWARILY adv. In a way pertaining to hardware. "The system is hardwarily unreliable." The adjective 'hardwary' is NOT used. See SOFTWARILY.
HARTLEY'S SECOND LAW: Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself.
HAS THE WORLD GONE MAD!
HAWKINS' THEORY: Progress consists in replacing a theory that is wrong with one more subtly wrong.
HD failure: (A)bort (R)etry (N)egotiate (C)ry
HE:  Let's end it all, bequeathin' our brains to science. SHE: What??  Science got enough trouble with their OWN brains. | Walt Kelley
HELL WITH JUSTICE, LYNCH THE @#$%^&!
HELLRUNG'S LAW: If you wait, it will go away. (SHAVELSON'S EXTENSION: . . . having done it's damage.)
HELP! My hard drive crashed & I can't boot up
HELP, I'm being held prisoner by this BBS.
HELP.. I need a tagline. HELP.. Not just any tagline.
HERSHISER'S FIRST RULE: Anything NEW and/or IMPROVED, isn't.
HERSHISER'S SECOND RULE: The Label NEW and/or IMPROVED means the price went up.
HHHHAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH| James Brown
HHeellpp!!    II''mm  ssttuucckk  iinn  hhaallff  dduupplleexx!!
HIC! HLLP I'M STUSCT IN BOOOZZZE WAREHUSE
HO!  <repeat three times>
HOFFER'S LAW: When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other.
HOFFSTEDT'S EMPLOYMENT PRINCIPLE: Confusion creates jobs.
HOPE: The feeling you have that the feeling you have isn't permanent. Jean Kerr
HOW can I be OVERDRAWN if I still have CHEQUES left???
HOWE'S LAW: Everyone has a scheme that will not work.
HUGO was a wimp compared to Desert Storm.
Habit converts luxurious enjoyments into dull and daily necessities. Aldous Huxley
Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time. Mark Twain
Habit is habit, and not to be flung out of the window by anyone, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time.
Habit, if not resisted, soon becomes necessity. Saint Augustine
Habit, n. a shackle for the free. - Ambrose Bierce
Habits are to the soul what the veins and arteries are to the blood, the courses in which it moves. Horace Bushnell
Hacker's Law: The belief that enhanced understanding will necessarily stir a nation to action is one of mankind's oldest illusions.
Hackers of the world, unite
Hackers of the world, unite!
Hacking's just another word for nothing left to kludge.
Hackito ergo sum.
Had I been present at the creation of the world I would have proposed some improvements. Alfonso X
Hail Eris!
Hail to the sun god He sure is a fun god Ra  Ra  Ra
Hailing frequencies open, Captain.
Hair barrettes | From "101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR"
Half Moon tonight.  (At least it's better than no Moon at all.)
Half a loaf is better than none Proverb
Half heart is no heart.
Half my lifetime I have earned my living by selling words, and I hope thoughts. Winston Churchill
Half of the American people never read a newspaper. Half never voted for President. One hopes it is the same half. Gore Vidal
Half of the people in the world are below average. Anonymous
Half the failures of this world arise from pulling in one's horse as he is leaping. Augustus Hare
Half the people who are constipated don't give a shit!
Half the work that is done in this world is to make things appear what they are not. Elias Root Beadle
Half the world does not know the joys of wearing cotton underwear. Phil Gramm, US senator and presidential candidate, promoting US exports, as quoted in Time, 1996
Half the world is composed of people who have something to say and can't, and the other half who have nothing to say and keep on saying it. Robert Frost
Hams do it with frequency, till their gigahertz.
Hams do it with greater frequency!!!
Hams do it with more frequencies.
Hand, n.: A singular instrument worn at the end of a human arm and commonly thrust into somebody's pocket. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Handle all business ventures with discretion so you do not end up a loser.
Handle yourself with your head, handle others with your heart.
Hands up!  Said the laser printer.
Hanging stops repeat offenders!
Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.
Hanson's Treatment of Time: There are never enough hours in a day, but always too many days before Saturday.
Happiness adds and multiplies as we divide it with others.
Happiness has many roots, but none more important than security. E. R. Stettinius, Jr.
Happiness is Earth in your rear view mirror.
Happiness is a hard disk.
Happiness is a twit filter...
Happiness is a warm gun.
Happiness is a warm modem
Happiness is a warm modem.
Happiness is a warm puppy with an empty bladder.
Happiness is an imaginary condition.
Happiness is finding special characters ^^^^^
Happiness is good health and a bad memory. Ingrid Bergman
Happiness is having ALL Star Trek shows on videotape!
Happiness is having a scratch for every itch. | Ogden Nash
Happiness is just an illusion, filled with sadness and confusion.
Happiness is like a sunbeam, which the least shadow intercepts, while adversity is often as the rain of spring. Chinese Proverb
Happiness is merely the remission of pain.
Happiness is no laughing matter.
Happiness is not a destination.  It's the trip.
Happiness is not a destination. It is a method of life. Burton Hills
Happiness is not a reward-it is a consequence. Suffering is not a punishment-it is a result. Robert Ingersoll
Happiness is not a rewardit is a consequence. Suffering is not a punishmentit is a result. Robert Green Ingersoll
Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory. Albert Schweitzer, doctor
Happiness is the harvest of a quiet eye. Austin O'Malley
Happiness is wanting what you have.
Happiness is your favorite program moving to Windows
Happiness is your favorite program moving to Windows.
Happiness is...receiving YOUR posts!!!!
Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember. Oscar Levent
Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember. | Oscar Levant
Happiness makes up in height for what it lacks in length. Robert Frost
Happiness makes up in height for what it lacks in length. Robert Frost Two things a man should never be angry at: what he can help, and what he cannot help. Thomas Fuller
Happiness must be cultivated. It is like character. It is not a thing to be safely let alone for a moment, or it will run to weeds. Elizabeth Stuart Phelps
Happiness takes no account of time.
Happiness, n.: An agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Happy days are here again.
Happy feast of the pig.
Hard DISK? Gee lady, I misunderstood you.
Hard Work never killed anyone, so why chance it?
Hard as it may appear in individual cases, dependent poverty ought to be held disgraceful. Thomas Robert Malthus
Hard where? soft where?
Hard work has a future payoff.  Laziness pays off now.
Hard work must have killed someone!
Hard work never killed anyone but why take a risk?
Hard work never killed anyone, but why chance it?
Hardware : the part you can kick.
Hardware Independent: Won't work on ANY hardware!
Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.
Hardware: the part you kick.
Hark, Hark, the dogs do bark The Duke is fond of kittens He likes to take their insides out And use them for his mittens | From "The Thirteen Clocks"
Hark, the Herald Tribune sings, Advertising wondrous things. | Tom Leher
Harmony of aim, not identity of conclusion, is the secret of sympathetic life. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Harp not on that string.
Harris's Lament: All the good ones are taken.
Harrisberger's Fourth Law of the Lab: Experience is directly proportional to the amount of equipment ruined.
Hartley's First Law: You can lead a horse to water, but if you can get him to float on his back, you've got something.
Hartley's Second Law: Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself.
Harvard Law: Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity, and other variables, the organism will do as it damn well pleases.
Has anyone found my marbles?
Has anyone seen my tagline?  I think someone stole it!!
Has this conference been sprinkled?????
Hasta la vista, baby !
Haste and rashness are storms and tempests, breaking and wrecking business; but nimbleness is a full, fair wind, blowing it with speed to the heaven. Thomas Fuller
Haste makes waste Proverb
Haste maketh waste.
Hasten to laugh at everything lest you be obliged to weep.
Hasty resolutions are of the nature of vows, and to be equally avoided. William Penn
Hat?  What hat?  That's a helipad for munchkins. | Guinan
Hate means never having to say you're sorry.
Hate shuts her soul when dove-eyed mercy pleads. Charles Sprague
Hateful is the power, and pitiable is the life, of those who wish to be feared rather than loved. Cornelius Nepos
Hateful to me as the gates of Hades is that man who hides one thing in his heart and speaks another. Homer
Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule. Buddha
Hatred is self-punishment. Hosea Ballou
Hatred is the madness of the heart. Lord Byron
Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Hatred, n.: A sentiment appropriate to the occasion of another's superiority. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Hau gerta ez dadin, oihan-guteak geldi tatzu!
Have Tardis, will travel.
Have a good day today and a better day tommorow
Have a nice day - unless you've made other plans.
Have a nice day - void where prohibited.
Have a nice day, and a better tomorrow !
Have a nice day.
Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else; this is not advice, it is merely custom. Mark Twain
Have an adequate day.
Have cursor, will curse.
Have more than thou showest-Speak less than thou knowest. William Shakespeare
Have no friends not equal to yourself.
Have patience awhile; slanders are not long-lived. Truth is the child of time; ere long she shall appear to vindicate thee. Immanuel Kant
Have the boy sent to the bridge. | Picard
Have the courage to be ignorant of a great number of things, in order to avoid the calamity of being ignorant of everything. Sydney Smith
Have time to waste ? Get Microsoft Windows 3.0 !
Have time to waste ? Get Microsoft Windows 3.x !
Have time to waste?  Get Microsoft Windows 3.0!
Have time to waste?  Get Microsoft Windows 3.1
Have we learned _from_ our past, or merely _about_ it?
Have you clubbed an ignorant human today ?
Have you crashed your Windows today?
Have you ever felt that all the world's a stage and you are the only one in the audience?
Have you ever noticed that the people who are always trying to tell you, "There's a time for work and a time for play," never find the time for play?
Have you ever received a Fax or a photocopy of a floppy?
Have you ever shown a novice the "any" key? ... Was it the power switch?
Have you ever talked into an acoustic modem?
Have you ever talked into an acoustic modem?... Did it answer?
Have you got all the stuffing up one end?
Have you heard the one about the rabbi, the goat and Bill Gates?
Have you hugged a porcupine today?
Have you hugged a programmer today ?
Have you hugged an electric fence today?
Have you hugged your Sysop today?
Have you hugged your computer lately ?
Have you hugged your logic probe today?
Have you hugged your motherboard today?
Have you locked your file cabinet?
Have you noticed that all you need to grow healthy, vigorous grass is a crack in your sidewalk?
Have you seen Quasimodo?  I had a hunch he was back.
Have you seen Quasimoto? I have a hunch he's back!
Have you sucked a crawfish head lately?
Have you thanked your SysOp today?
Have you tried on your smile today?
Have you uploaded clip art today?
Have your girl call my girl, and let's do lunch Thursday.| Yuppy Speak
Having a good memory is useless unless you have something good to remember.
Having children is hereditary: If your parents didn't have any, then you probably won't either.
Having nothing, nothing can he lose.
Having the critics praise you is like having the hangman say you've got a pretty neck. Eli Wallach
Having the fewest wants, I am nearest to the gods.
Having two bathrooms ruins the capacity to co-operate.
Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is in the Pacific. It is a part of the United States that is an island that is right here. Dan Quayle, IN senator and US vice president, during a speech in Hawaii, 1989
Hawaii is as American as apple poi.
He ain't heavy;  he's a Shareware Author.
He alone is an acute observer, who can observe minutely without being observed. Johann Kaspar Lavater
He bears misery that hides it most.
He bellows like a cow standing on her tit.
He can feel no little wants who is in pursuit of grandeur. Johann Kaspar Lavater
He does it with a better grace, but I do it more natural.
He does it with a better grace, but I do it more natural. William Shakespeare
He does not possess wealth that allows it to possess him. Benjamin Franklin
He does not seem to me to be a free man who does not sometimes do nothing. Cicero
He does the work of 3 Men...Moe, Larry & Curly
He does the work of three men: Larry, Moe and Curly.
He fishes well who uses a golden hook. Latin Proverb
He had occasional flashes of silence that made his conversation perfectly delightful. Sydney Smith
He had that rare weird electricity about him -- that extremely wild and heavy presence that you only see in a person who has abandoned all hope of ever behaving "normally." | Hunter S. Thompson, "Fear and Loathing '72"
He hadn't a single redeeming vice. | Oscar Wilde
He hadn't a single redeeming vice.| Oscar Wilde
He has Van Gogh's ear for music.
He has all of the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire. Sir Winston Churchill
He has been called a mediocre man; but this is unwarranted flattery. He was a politician of monumental littleness. Theodore Roosevelt
He has not acquired a fortune; the fortune has acquired him.
He has occasional flashes of silence, that make his conversation perfectly delightful. Sydney Smith
He has too many lice to feel an itch.
He hath eaten me out of house and home.
He is a fool who cannot be angry, but he is a wise man who will not.
He is a self-made man, and worships his creator.
He is a sheep in sheep's clothing.
He is almost a statesman.  He lies well.
He is almost a statesman. He lies well.
He is always the severest censor of the merit of others who has the least worth of his own. Elias Lyman Maggon
He is armed without who is innocent within, be this thy screen, and this thy wall of brass. Horace
He is greatest whose strength carries up the most hearts by the attraction of his own. Henry Ward Beecher
He is most free from danger, who, even when safe, is on his guard. Publilius Syrus
He is neither a strategist nor is he schooled in the operational arts, nor is he a tactician, nor is he a general. Other than that he's a great military man. Norman Schwartzkopf, US general and gulf war commander, describing Saddam Hussein of Iraq, 1991
He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides.
He is no wise man who will quit a certainty for an uncertainty. Samuel Johnson
He is not only dull within, but causes dullness without.
He is rich or poor according to what he is, not according to what he has. Henry Ward Beecher
He is rich who owes nothing. French Proverb
He is richest who is content with the least, for content is the wealth of nature. Socrates
He is the best physician who is the most ingenious inspirer of hope. Samuel Taylor Coleridge
He is the happiest, be he king or peasant, who finds peace in his home. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
He is the most sensible looking man talking nonsense.
He is truly wise who gains wisdom from another's mishap.
He is truly wise who gains wisdom from another's mishap. Anonymous
He is useless on top of the ground; he ought to be under it inspiring the cabbages.
He keeps differentiating.... flying off on a tangent.
He knows little who tells his wife all he knows. Thomas Fuller
He knows much of what men paint themselves would blister in the light of what they are. Edwin Arlington Robinson
He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career. George Bernard Shaw, english playwrite
He knows so little and knows it so fluently. Ellen Glasgow
He liked to like people, therefore people liked him.
He likes to flirt, but toward you his intentions are honorable.
He lives long that lives until all are weary of him.
He looked at me as if I was a side dish he hadn't ordered.
He mocks the people who proposes that the government shall protect the rich that they in turn may care for the laboring poor. Grover Cleveland
He must be very ignorant for he answers every question he is asked. Voltaire
He only employs his passion who can make no use of his reason. Cicero
He played the king as if afraid someone else would play the ace. | John Mason Brown, drama critic
He presents me with what is always an acceptable gift who brings me news of a great thought before unknown. He enriches me without impoverishing himself. Ralph Waldo Emerson
He serves his party best who serves the country best. Rutherford B. Hayes
He spake well who said that graves are the footprints of angels. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
He stands erect by bending over the fallen. He rises by lifting others. Robert Green Ingersoll
He submits to be seen through a microscope, who suffers himself to be caught in a fit of passion. Johann Kaspar Lavater
He that blows the coals in quarrels he has nothing to do with has no right to complain if the sparks fly in his face. Benjamin Franklin
He that can have patience can have what he will. Benjamin Franklin
He that can take rest is greater than he that can take cities. Benjamin Franklin
He that complies against his will is of his own opinion still. Samuel Butler
He that does good for good's sake seeks neither paradise nor reward, but he is sure of both in the end. William Penn
He that does not ask will never get a bargain. French Proverb
He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals.
He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals. Benjamin Franklin
He that falls in love with himself, will have no rivals. -- Poor Richard.
He that falls into sin is a man; that grieves at it, is a saint; that boasteth of it, is a devil. Thomas Fuller
He that fights and runs away will live to fight another day. Old English Rhyme
He that gives good advice, builds with one hand; he that gives good counsel and example, builds with both; but he that gives good admonition and bad example, builds with one hand and pulls down with the other. Francis Bacon
He that has done you a kindness will be more ready to do you another, than he whom you yourself have obliged. Benjamin Franklin
He that hath a trade hath an estate; he that hath a calling hath an office of profit and honor. Benjamin Franklin
He that hath ears to hear, let him hear.
He that hunts down two hares will catch neither.
He that is down need fear no fall. John Bunyan
He that is giddy thinks the world turns round.
He that is good, will infallibly become better, and he that is bad, will as certainly become worse; for vice, virtue and time are three things that never stand still. Charles Caleb Colton
He that is of the opinion money will do everything may well be suspected of doing everything for money. Benjamin Franklin
He that is possessed with a prejudice is possessed with a devil, and one of the worst kinds of devils, for it shuts out the truth, and often leads to ruinous error. Tryon Edwards
He that is without sin among you, let him cast the first stone. John 8:7
He that knows himself, knows others; and he that is ignorant of himself, could not write a very profound lecture on other men's heads. Charles Caleb Colton
He that knows little soon repeats it.
He that lives to forever, never fears dying. William Penn
He that lives upon hope will die fasting. Benjamin Franklin
He that loseth wealth, loseth much; he that loseth friends, loseth more; but he that loseth his spirit loseth all. Spanish Maxim
He that never changes his opinions, never corrects his mistakes, and will never be wiser on the morrow than he is today. Tryon Edwards
He that raises a large family does, indeed, while he lives to observe them, stand a broader mark for sorrow; but then he stands a broader mark for pleasure too. Benjamin Franklin
He that respects himself is safe from others; He wears a coat of mail that none can pierce. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
He that thinks he can afford to be negligent is not far from being poor. Samuel Johnson
He that thinks himself the wisest is generally the least so. C.C. Colton
He that waits upon fortune, is never sure of a dinner. Benjamin Franklin
He that will not command his thoughts will soon lose the command of his actions.
He that will not reason is a bigot; he that cannot reason is a fool; and he that dares not reason is a slave. William Drummond
He that will not sail till all dangers are over must never put to sea. Thomas Fuller
He that won't be counselled can't be helped. Benjamin Franklin
He that would govern others, first should be the master of himself.
He that would make his own liberty secure must guard even his enemy from oppression; for if he violates this duty, he establishes a precedent that will reach to himself. Thomas Paine
He that's secure is not safe. Benjamin Franklin
He thinks by infection, catching an opinion like a cold.
He thinks he could easily win your heart.
He thought he saw an albatross That fluttered 'round the lamp. He looked again and saw it was A penny postage stamp. "You'd best be getting home," he said, "The nights are rather damp."
He to whom the present is the only thing that is present, knows nothing of the age in which he lives. Oscar Wilde
He walks as if balancing the family tree on his nose.
He wants a shoe horn, the kind with teeth
He was a fiddler, and consequently a rogue.
He was a multi-millionaire. Wanna know how he made all of his money? He designed the little diagrams that tell which way to put batteries in. Stephen Wright
He was a self made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.
He was one of those men who possess almost every gift, except the gift of the power to use them. Charles Kingsley
He was so learned that he could name a horse in nine languages; so ignorant that he bought a cow to ride on. Benjamin Franklin
He was so narrow-minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.
He was so narrow-minded he could see through a keyhole with two eyes.
He went off in a huff. Make that a minute-and-a-huff.| Groucho Marx
He who Laughs, Lasts.
He who always plows a straight furrow is in a rut.
He who asks a question may be a fool for five minutes. But he who never asks a question remains a fool forever. Tom J. Connelly
He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever. Chinese Proverb
He who attacks the fundamentals of the American broadcasting industry attacks democracy itself. | William S. Paley, chairman of CBS
He who avoids the temptation avoids the sin.
He who believes the past cannot be changed has not yet written his memoirs.
He who borrows sells his freedom. German Proverb
He who buys what he needs not, sells what he needs. Japanese Proverb
He who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead; his eyes are closed. Albert Einstein
He who can take no great interest in what is small will take false interest in what is great. John Ruskin
He who can, does. He who cannot, teaches. George Bernard Shaw
He who cannot resist temptation is not a man. Horace Mann
He who chooses the beginning of a road chooses the place it leads to. It is the means that determine the end. Harry Emerson Fosdick
He who comes for the inheritance is often made to pay for the funeral. Yiddish Proverb
He who commits injustice is ever made more wretched than he who suffers it. Plato
He who cooks carrots and peas in same pot unsanitary.
He who decides a case without hearing the other side...though he decides justly, cannot be considered just. Seneca
He who dies with the most access, wins.
He who dies with the most software WINS !
He who dies with the most toys is still DEAD !
He who dies with the most toys is still dead.
He who does not understand your silence will probably not understand your words. Elbert Hubbard
He who doesn't risk never gets to drink champagne. Russian Proverb
He who enters contest is optimistic as submarine with screen doors.
He who falls in love with himself will have no rivals.
He who flees from trial confesses his guilt. Publilius Syrus
He who foresees calamities suffers them twice over.
He who forgiveth, and is reconciled unto his enemy, shall receive his reward from God; for he loveth not the unjust doers. Koran, sura 42
He who forsees calamities, suffers them twice over. Beilby Porteus
He who has a shady past knows that nice guys finish $ast.
He who has a shady past knows that nice guys finish last.
He who has a thousand friends Has not a friend to spare, While he who has one enemy Shall meet him everywhere. -Ralph Waldo Emerson
He who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare, And he who has one enemy will meet him everywhere. Ralph Waldo Emerson
He who has health has hope; and he who has hope, has everything. Arab Proverb
He who has health, has hope; and he who has hope, has everything. Arabian Proverb
He who has imagination without learning has wings and no feet. Joseph Joubert
He who has imagination without learning has wings but no feet.
He who has no taste for order, will be often wrong in his judgment, and seldom considerate or conscientious in his actions. Johann Kaspar Lavater
He who has provoked the shaft of wit, cannot complain that he smarts from it. Samuel Johnson
He who has the gold, makes the rules.
He who hates vices hates mankind.
He who hesitates is constipated.
He who hesitates is last.
He who hesitates is lost Proverb
He who hesitates is sometimes saved.
He who hesitates too long, must change his underwear.
He who hesitates.........miss'es out !!!
He who hoots with owls by night cannot soar with eagles by day.
He who hurries can not walk with dignity. Chinese Proverb
He who imagines he can do without the world deceives himself much; but he who fancies the world cannot do without him is still more mistaken. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
He who invents adages for others to peruse takes along a rowboat when going on a cruise.
He who is firm in will molds the world to himself Johann Wolfgang von Coethe
He who is flogged by fate and laughs the louder is a masochist.
He who is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.
He who is henpecked may lend an ear to other chicks.
He who is most concerned is always the last to hear.
He who is not impatient is not in love. Italian Proverb
He who is too scared to throw the dice will never throw six.
He who knows all the answers never gets asked the questions.
He who knows how to be poor knows everything. Jules Michelet
He who knows little quickly tells it. Italian Proverb
He who knows nothing doubts nothing. Italian Proverb
He who knows others is wise.  He who knows himself is enlightened.
He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.
He who knows, does not speak.  He who speaks, does not know.
He who labors diligently need never despair; for all things are accomplished by diligence and labor. Menander of Athens
He who laughs last didn't get the joke.
He who laughs last didn't understand the joke.
He who laughs last is S-L-O-W.
He who laughs last is probably your boss.
He who laughs last laughs best Proverb
He who laughs last probably doesn't understand the joke.
He who laughs last probably made a backup.
He who laughs, lasts.
He who laughs... lasts.
He who let woman on top is fucking up.
He who lives by the sword eats with bloody hands.
He who lives by the sword laughs last.
He who lives only to benefit himself confers on the world a benefit when he dies. Tertullian
He who lives without folly is less wise than he believes.
He who looks like his passport photo is not well enough to travel.
He who loses his head is usually the last one to miss it.
He who mistrusts most should be trusted least!
He who molds the public sentiment ... makes statues and decisions possible or impossible to make. Abraham Lincoln
He who never sticks out neck, never wins by nose.
He who opens a school door, closes a prison. Victor Hugo
He who places head in sand, will get kicked in the end!
He who praises everybody, praises nobody. Samuel Johnson
He who promises runs in debt. The Talmud
He who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is not fit for the kingdom of winners.
He who puts his nose to the grindstone gets a bloody nose.
He who puts his nose to the grindstone is a bloody fool.
He who puts up with insult invites injury. Jewish Proverb
He who reads many fortunes gets confused.
He who sacrifices his conscience to ambition burns a picture to get ashes.
He who sacrifices his conscience to ambition burns a picture to obtain the ashes. Chinese Proverb
He who shouts the loudest has the floor.
He who sits on the pinnacle of power is still sitting on his own backside
He who slings mud looses ground.
He who slings mud loses ground.
He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.
He who sneezes without a handkerchief takes matters into his own hands.
He who spares the guilty threatens the innocent.
He who spends a storm beneath a tree, takes life with a grain of TNT.
He who steps on others to reach the top has good balance.
He who stops being better stops being good. Oliver Cromwell
He who talks much cannot talk well. Carlo Goldoni
He who tells you how great he is usually isn't.
He who throws mud loses ground.
He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away. Raymond Hull
He who trusts secrets to a servant makes him his master. John Dryden
He who undertakes too much seldom succeeds. Dutch Proverb
He who uses bad language is an ignorant schmuck.
He who will not economize will have to agonize. Confucius
He who wishes to secure the good of others has already secured his own. Confucius
He who would leap far must first take a long run. Danish Proverb
He will always be a slave who does not know how to live upon a little. Horace
He would always rush in where fools fear to tread.
He wouldn't recognize subtlety if it hit them on the head
He's ALIVE, Jim. Where did I go wrong?
He's DEAD, Jim Go to Sick Bay and get the Maggot Master
He's DEAD, Jim. Get his ears. - Spock
He's DEAD, Jim. Tell the Klingons that dinner is served.
He's DEAD, Jim. You get his teeth. | "Bones" McCoy, DDS
He's Dead Jim, thats 10 this week already.
He's Dead Jim. Get His Phaser, I Got His Wallet.
He's a SOB -- but at least he's *our* SOB.
He's a wild man. Get out of here.
He's alive, Jim.  Should I shoot him again?
He's asking to have this VISOR shoved someplace.  Geordi
He's dead Jim.
He's dead Jim.  You get his tricorder,  I'll get his watch
He's dead Jim.  You take his phaser and I'll get his wallet
He's dead Jim. Grab his tricorder. I'll get his wallet.
He's dead Jim. Grab his tricorder. I'll get his watch
He's dead Jim... Grab his wallet
He's dead, Jim.
He's dead, Jim. Grab his tricorder. I'll get his wallet.
He's dead, Jim. Kick him if you don't believe me.
He's dim, Jed
He's got a magnet  Everybody BACKUP
He's got a watch with a minute hand, millennium hand, and an eon hand.
He's got less brains than a woodpecker on an aluminum telephone pole!
He's mostly dead, Jim. Get Miracle Max.
He's no failure. He's not dead yet. William Lloyd George
He's not dead, Jim, he's just metabolically challenged.
He's not the Messiah, he's a very Naughty Boy| Brian's Mum
He's still standing in that familiar upright position.
He's the kind of guy, that, well, if you were ever in a jam he'd be there ... with two slices of bread and some chunky peanut butter.
He's without doubt the greatest sweeper in the world, I'd say, at a guess.
Head Cleaner - rotary brillo pad.
Head Crash - what your crash helmet is for.
Heads I win... DITTO tails
Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Health is not valued until sickness comes.
Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship. Buddha
Health is the slowest possible rate to die.
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. Redd Foxx
Hear reason, or she'll make you feel her. Benjamin Franklin
Heard on Noahs' ark: Sailing is fun, but scrubbing the decks is aardvark.
Heather: Get drunk and tip cows.
Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned. William Congreve
Heaven sometimes hedges a rare character about with ungainliness and odium, as the burr that protects the fruit. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Heaven will be inherited by every man who has heaven in his soul. Henry Ward Beecher
Heaven will be no heaven to me if I do not meet my wife there. Andrew Jackson
Heaven, n.: A place where the wicked cease from troubling you with talk of their personal affairs, and the good listen with attention while you expound your own. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Heavy, adj.: Seduced by the chocolate side of the force.
Heisenberg may have been here.
Hell Hath No Pizza.
Hell There may be some doubt about hell beyond the grave but there is no doubt about there being one on this side of it. Ed Howe
Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned. Milton Friedman
Hell hath no fury like a bureaucrat scorned. | Milton Friedman
Hell hath no fury like a democrat scorned.
Hell hath no fury like lawyer of a woman scorned.
Hell hath no fury like the lawyer of a woman scorned.
Hell hath no pizza.
Hell is kept warm with profane burners.
Hell is truth seen too lateduty neglected in its season. Tryon Edwards
Hell with Pascal and C.  I am a QuickBasic Snob.
Hell's broken loose.
Hell, if you understood everything I said, you'd be me!
Heller's Law: The first myth of management is that it exists. Johnson's Corollary: Nobody really knows what is going on anywhere within the organization.
Hello I'm Bounder of Adventure
Hello little girl, want some candy?
Hello! I'm Bounder of Adventure!
Hello, Dave, it's good to be working with you again.
Hello, I am part number 3:^:3:3[3:]3:]33
Hello, I am part number ޺۳ݳݳ
Hello, Jane speaking.| Jane
Hello, happy taxpayer !
Hello, my serial number is޺۳ݳ
Hello, sailor!
Hello.. Incontinence Hotline.. Can you hold?
Hellrung's Law: If you wait, it will go away.  Shavelson's Extension: ...after having done its damage.  Grelb's Addition: If it was bad, it will be back.
Help  I'm parked diagonally in a parallel universe.
Help  I'm trapped in a PDP 11/70
Help  I'm trapped inside an Amdahl 470
Help  I'm trapped inside an Amdahl 580
Help ! I hit the power switch and it didn't die !
Help Every great man is always being helped by everybody; for his gift is to get good out of all things and all persons. John Ruskin
Help My computer is holding me prisoner...
Help a swallow land at Capistrano.
Help endangered species - adopt a KGB operative.
Help fight continental drift.
Help fight truth decay.
Help stamp out and abolish redundancy !
Help stamp out mental illness, or I'll kill you!
Help stamp out, eliminate, and abolish redundancy!
Help stampout 'smart mouthed' Sysops!
Help stampout unfriendly conference hosts!
Help the economy : buy something here !
Help you out? Certainly! Which way did you come in?
Help!  I'm lost somewhere in the Generation Gap.
Help!  I'm modeming...   and I can't hang up!!!
Help!  I'm parked diagonally in a parallel universe.
Help!  I'm trapped inside an Amdahl 470!
Help!  I'm trapped inside an Amdahl 580!
Help!  I've been stuck in here for years and years...
Help! I'm being held prisoner in a fortune cookie factory!
Help! I've fallen and can't get up.
Help! I've fallen off line and can't hang-up!
Help! I've tripped and I can't come down!
Help!! I hit the power switch and it didn't die
Help, I'm modeming And I can't hang up
Help,,,my (S)ex drive just crashed!!!
Help--I'm being held captive by my modem
Help.  I'm trapped at 0D1C:01DA.
Hepaticocholecystostcholecystenterostomy
Her last birthday cake looked like a prairie fire
Her legs went from here to here... Here smile went from here to here... Her tongue went from here to where?
Her mouth is a honey-blossom, No doubt, as the poet sings; But within her lips, the petals, Lurks a cruel bee that stings. William D. Howells
Here I sit, in a tizzy - all my favorite boards are busy.
Here Strange ain't Strange !!! It's Normal.
Here Strange ain't Strange. It's Normal.
Here Tag C'mon Tag Good Tag. Good boy
Here comes the orator, with his flood of words and his drop of reason.
Here in America we are descended in blood and in spirit from revolutionists and rebels, men and women who dare to dissent from accepted doctrine. As their heirs, may we never confuse honest dissent with disloyal subversion. Dwight D. Eisenhower
Here today, dawn tommorow.
Here today, dawn tomorrow.
Here today, gaunt tomorrow.
Here's Looking At You, Kid
Here's looking at you, kid.
Here, there........and everywhere......
Hereditary - Opposite of Thereditary
Heredity : If your parents had no kids, you won't.
Hero worship is strongest where there is least regard for human freedom. Herbert Spencer
Hero-worship is mostly idol gossip. Anonymous
Heroes are not known by the loftiness of their carriage; the greatest braggarts are generally the merest cowards. Jean Jacques Rousseau
Heroism Every hero becomes at last a bore. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Heroism is not only in the man, but in the occasion. Calvin Coolidge
Hesitancy in judgment is the only true mark of the thinker. Dagobert D. Runes
Heuristics are bug ridden by definition.  If they didn't have bugs, then they'd be algorithms.
Hex Dump - Where Witches put used Curses ?
Hey  Your Trakball is upside down
Hey ! Don't pick up that phoׯች NO CARRIER
Hey Jim, are we there yet ?
Hey Odo, got any more of that Jell-O in the 'fridge?
Hey Pee Wee, Button your fly!
Hey Rocky - watch me pull a sysop outta my hat!
Hey Underpants, I'm talking to YOU!
Hey Vanilla Ice! Meet Mr. Halite!
Hey Wally!  Come look at this.
Hey You can't park there| Mohican to first American settlers.
Hey babe, Wanna get LUCKY|Pick up line
Hey babe....do you realize that my mouth can generate over 750 psi?|Pick up line
Hey baby, let's go make some babies.|Pick up line
Hey baby...can you suck start a Harley?|Pick up line
Hey baby...can you suck the chrome off a bumper??|Pick up line
Hey baby...infect me|Pick up line
Hey!  Hacker!  Leave those lists alone!
Hey!  This is a morgue, not an amusement park!
Hey!  Who took the cork off my lunch??!
Hey!  Who uncorked my bottle of lunch?
Hey!  Your Trakball is upside down!
Hey! Don't pick up that phoׯች NO CARRIER
Hey!! When in Doubt Whip it Out!!!!
Hey, dad, will you buy me a flame thrower?
Hey, shit happens!
Hey, whats that beeping noise? Wheres that smoke comi
Hey, whats that beeping noise? Wheres that smoke coming from?
Hey, where do I get my Tourist shooting license?
Hey, who spilled coffee on my keyboard?!
Hey.. wait.. what are you doing..  Hey!  Put that down!   Aaaahhhh!
Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's Hand Grenades I throw
Hi I'm a tagline virus Steal me & join in the fun
Hi ho, Hi ho, its off to work we go.
Hi there  This is just a note from me, to you, to tell you, the person reading this note, that I can't think up any more famous quotes, jokes, nor bizarre stories, so you may as well go home.
Hi there I'm interested in having breakfast with you. Can I call you or nudge you?|Pick up line
Hi!  I can't remember your name either.
Hi, I'm Chip. Micro Chip. Eight-o-three-eighty-six!
Hi, kids  Ed Barbera here
Hi, kids!  Ed Barbera here!
Hi, my Goldfish looks just like yours !
Hi.  My name is Rover, I'll paint your car yellow free.
Hi. Just called to touch base with you guys.| Dave Parker, Sage Inc.
Hic sunt leones.
Hick: Looks both ways before crossing a one-way street.
Hide not your talents, they for use were made. What's a sundial in the shade? Benjamin Franklin
Hide your body in the Big Dipper. Zen Saying
Higgeldy Piggeldy, Hamlet of Elsinore Ruffled the critics by Dropping this bomb: "Phooey on Freud and his Psychoanalysis Oedipus, Shmoedipus, I just loved Mom."
High Level Languages are placed on more experienced computers.
High aims form high characters, and great objects bring out great minds. Tryon Edwards
High finance isn't burglary or obtaining money by false pretenses, but rather a judicious selection from the best features of those fine arts. Finley Peter Dunne
High thoughts must have high language.| Aristophanes
Hindsight is always 20:20.
Hindsight is an exact science.
Hindsight is an exact science. Anonymous
Hippie: One that leaves no turn unstoned.
Hippy: a guy who looks like a jill and smells like a john.
Hips or lips:  Let your conscience be your guide...
Hire teenagers while they still know everything.
Hire the morally handicapped
Hire the morally handicapped.
His face was filled with broken commandments.
His fork only has one tong.
His heart was yours from the first moment that you met.
His life was formal; his actions seemed ruled with a ruler.
His name isn't even IVAN STANG!  It's SMITH!  Doug Smith!
Historian: person with extra-century perception.
Historians prophesy about the past.
Historically the profoundest meaning of Passover is something which sets Judaism apart from other religions. It marks the birth of a nation. Out of a mass of slaves, Moses fashioned a nation and gave them a faith. From that day to this, Jews have neve Philip S. Bernstein
History The main thing is to make history, not to write it. Otto von Bismarck
History always repeats itself: once as tragedy, the second time as farce.
History books which contain no lies are extremely dull.
History doesn't repeat itself -- historians merely repeat each other.|
History is bunk.
History is bunk. Henry Ford
History is little more than the register of the crimes, follies and misfortunes of mankind. Edward Gibbon
History is more or less bunk. Henry Ford
History is nothing but a pack of tricks that we play upon the dead. Voltaire
History repeats itself because nobody listens
History repeats itself, and that's one of the things that's wrong with history. Clarence Darrow
History repeats itself.  That's one thing wrong with history.
History repeats itself. That's one of the things wrong with history. Clarence Darrow
History repeats itself; historians repeat each other.
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives. Abba Eban
History: An illusion caused by the passage of time.
Hit any user to continue.
Hit the any key?  Where's the any key?| DOS user
Hit the ball over the fence and you can take your time going around the bases.. John W. Raper
Hitch your wagon to a star. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Hiya, Doc What's cookin'? | Data
Hjrad's Law: For every action, there is an extreme and unwarranted revenge.
Hlade's Law: If you have a difficult task, give it to a lazy person -- they will find an easier way to do it.
Hmmm.. what's this red button foNO CARRIER
Hoare's Law of Large Problems: Inside every large problem is a small problem struggling to get out.
Hobo: A person who builds palaces and lives in shacks.
Hofstadter's Law: It always takes longer than you expect, even when you take Hofstadter's Law into account.
Hold on - wait, maybe the answer's looking for you.
Hold on- wait, maybe the answer's looking for you.
Hold still, this won't hurt me a bit.
Hollow chocolate has no calories
Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom.
Hollywood is where if you don't have happiness you send out for it. | Rex Reed
Hollywood: A trip through a sewer in a glass bottom boat.
Holy Smokes!...."the church is on fire!"
Home Home life is no more natural to us than a cage is to a cockatoo. George Bernard Shaw
Home cooking is the greatest thing in the world!
Home interprets heaven. Home is heaven for beginners. Charles H. Parkhurst
Home is not where you live, but where they understand you. Christian Morgenstern
Home is the most popular, and will be the most enduring of all earthly establishments. Channing Pollock
Home is the nicest place you will ever go.
Home is the place where, when you have to go there, They have to take you in. Robert Frost
Home is where the computer is plugged in.
Home is where the heart is. Pliny the Elder
Home, the spot of earth supremely blest, A dearer, sweeter spot than all the rest. Robert Montgomery
Homer          Marge           Bart            Lisa            Baby Maggie | THE SIMPSONS
HomerDOS error: Abort, Retry, D'Ohh!
Honest Politician: One who stays bought.
Honest differences are often a healthy sign of progress. Mahatma Gandhi
Honest differences are often a healthy sign of progress.| Mahatma Gandhi
Honest!  It's only a cold sore!
Honestly, the new modem's working just fi{Œ
Honesty and service.
Honesty is almost always the best policy.
Honesty is exact to a cent.
Honesty is the best image.
Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it. Mark Twain
Honesty is the first chapter of the book of wisdom. Thomas Jefferson
Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain't lawful tender for a loaf of bread. Josh Billings
Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people. Kin Hubbard
Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people. | F. M. Hubbard
Honesty pays, but it don't seem to pay enough to suit some people. Kin Hubbard
Honesty pays, but not enough for some.
Honesty's the best policy.
Honesty: Fear of being caught.
Honey, I'll be down in 10 minutes, I promise this time.
Honey, PLEASE don't pickup the p
Honey, just one more message... I really MEAN it this time !
Honeymoon - the morning after the knot before.
Honeymoon Salad: Lettuce alone, with no dressing.
Honeymoon: time between "I do" and "you'd better"
Honi soit la vache qui rit.
Honk if you hate bumper stickers that say "Honk if ..."
Honk if you love obscene gestures.
Honk if you love peace and quiet. | Bumper Sticker
Honor The louder he talked of his honor, the faster we counted our spoons. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Honor lies in honest toil. Grover Cleveland
Honor would be better served if I were your mate. | Worf
Honorable, adj.: Afflicted with an impediment in one's reach. In legislative bodies, it is customary to mention all members as honorable; as, "the honorable gentleman is a scurvy cur." | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Hoooow much is that Blooonde in the window!?
Hope In all things it is better to hope than to despair. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. English Proverb
Hope is a good breakfast, but it is a bad supper.
Hope is a waking dream.
Hope is sweeter than possession.
Hope is the only universal liar who never loses his reputation for veracity. Robert Green Ingersoll
Hope is the parent of faith. Cyrus A. Bartol
Hope is the struggle of the soul, breaking loose from what is perishable, and attesting her eternity. Herman Melville
Hope of ill gain is the beginning of loss. Democritus
Horn busted! Watch for finger...
Hors d'oeuvres--a ham sandwich cut into forty pieces.
Horse sense is the thing a horse has that keeps it from betting on people.
Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people. | W. C. Fields
Horse sense is what keeps horses from betting on people.
Horse's can't fly!  Horse feathers...
Horses just naturally have mohawk haircuts. Anonymous
Hospitals: Places where the run down wind up.
Hot air sometimes thaws out a cold reception.
Hot dogs are best when served with a ballgame.
Hot glass looks exactly like cold glass.
Hot glass looks the same as cold glass. Cirino's Law of Burnt Fingers
Hotel: A place you give good dollars for bad quarters.
Houdini escaping from New Jersey
Houdini escaping from New Jersey!
Hours are Time's shafts, and one comes winged with death. Scottish Clock Motto
Houseguests, like fish, stink after the third day.
Housework can kill you if done right.
Housework done properly, can kill you
Houston! do you read.
How about a helicopter with an ejection seat?
How about a little fire, scarecrow?
How am I supposed to know what a rhetorical question is ?
How apt the poor are to be proud.
How are you going to do it ? Upgrade it !
How awful to reflect that what people say of us is true. Logan P. Smith
How blind are those who refuse to see?
How calmly may we commit ourselves to the hands of Him who bears up the world. Jean Paul Richter
How can I fail when I have no purpose ?
How can I love you if you won't lie down?
How can I miss you if you won't go away ?
How can I miss you if you won't go away?
How can you avoid hurting someones feelings without being a liar?
How can you be deaf with ears like that? | McCoy
How can you be in two places at once when you're not anywhere at all?
How can you be so deaf with those huge ears ?
How can you govern a nation which has 246 kinds of cheese?
How can you tell if a man is lying? His lips move!
How can you tell when sour cream goes bad? The human mind ordinarily operates at only ten percent of its capacity. Anonymous
How can you work when the system's so crowded?
How come all the buttons keep flying off my shirt?
How come only your friends step on your new white sneakers?
How come pizza gets to your house faster than the police?
How come there's only one Monopolies Commission?
How come we never talk anymore?
How come wrong numbers are never busy?
How could I have downloaded a virus??  It said NO CARRIER
How could drops of water know themselves to be a river? Yet the river flows on. Antoine de Saint-Exupry
How did a fool and his money get together in the first place?
How dieth the wise man? As the fool.
How do I get my words to RIME ?
How do I set my Laser Printer to "Stun"?
How do I set my phaser to tickle?
How do YOU spell computer?
How do frogs die? Ker-mit suicide
How do they get teflon to stick to the pans?
How do you double the value of a Pinto? Fill the tank.
How do you explain school to a higher intelligence? | Elliot, "E.T."
How do you get holy water?... Boil the hell out of it!
How do you keep a turkey in suspense?
How do you know it's summer in Seattle ? The rain's warmer.
How do you know when you've run out of invisible ink?
How do you make Windows faster? Throw it harder!
How do you make Windows faster? Throw it harder.
How do you pronounce my name?   With reverence.
How do you tell if a bagpipe is out of tune?
How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
How do you write zero in Roman numerals?
How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? From a catalog!
How far must suffering and misery go before we see that even in the day of vast cities and powerful machines, the good earth is our mother and that if we destroy her, we destroy ourselves? Paul Bigelow Sears
How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in your life you will have been all of these. George Washington Carver, american inventor and horticulturist
How frighteningly few are the persons whose death would spoil our appetite and make the world seem empty. Eric Hoffer
How glorious it is - and also how painful - to be an exception. Alfred de Musset
How good bad music and bad reasons sound when we march against an enemy. Friedrich Nietzsche
How high I am  /  How much I see  /  How far I reach  /  Depends on me
How inimitably graceful children are before they learn to dance. Samuel Taylor Coleridge
How little do they see what is, who frame their hasty judgments upon that which seems. Robert Southey
How little it takes to make life unbearable: a pebble in the shoe, a cockroach in the spaghetti, a woman's laugh. H. L. Mencken
How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.
How long a minute is depends on which side of the bathroom door you're on.
How long befor it happens here?
How long will a floating point operation float?
How many "coming men" has one known!  Where on earth do they all go to?
How many "coming people" has one known Where on earth do they all go to?
How many Monty Python fans does it take to change a light bulb?
How many Monty Python fans does it take to change a light bulb? One another to claim he didn't want to change it anyway, he always wanted to be a lumberjack.
How many Monty Python fans does it take to change a light bulb? One to ask for a licence for his pet bulb, Eric
How many Monty Python fans does it take to change a light bulb? One to ask for a new bulb with no spam in it...
How many Monty Python fans does it take to change a light bulb? One to claim it is an ex light bulb, it is no more.
How many Monty Python fans does it take to change a light bulb? One to get nailed to the light socket.
How many Monty Python fans does it take to change a light bulb? One to say that in his day, they had it tough
How many Monty Python fans does it take to change a light bulb? One to summarise Proust.
How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb? None.  The Universe spines the bulb, and the Zen master stays out of the way.
How many consultants will fit onto the head of a pin?
How many hardware engineers does it take to change a lightbulb? None: "We'll fix it in software."
How many hopes and fears, how many ardent wishes and anxious apprehensions are twisted together in the threads that connect the parent with the child! Samuel Griswold Goodrich
How many of you believe in telekinesis?  Raise MY hand
How many software engineers does it take to change a lightbulb? None: "We'll document it in the manual."
How many tech writers does it take to change a lightbulb? None: "The user can work it out."
How many times do you need to be tolled anyway?
How many weeks are there in a light year?
How much can I get away with and still go to heaven.
How much can I get away with and still go to heaven?
How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
How much does it cost to entice a dope-smoking UNIX system guru to Dayton? | Brian Boyle, UNIX/WORLD's First Annual Salary Survey
How much easier is self-sacrifice than self-realization! Eric Hoffer
How much have cost us the evils that never happened! Thomas Jefferson
How much memory have you got?  One brain, one memory.
How much sin can I get away with and still go to heaven?
How much to downgrade to Turbo C 2.0 ?
How much to downgrade to Turbo C-- ?
How much wood did Peter Piper pick..No wait..
How noble the law, in its majestic equality, that both the rich and poor are equally prohibited from peeing in the streets, sleeping under bridges, and stealing bread! Anatole France
How sharper than a hound's tooth it is to have a thankless serpent.
How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is To have a thankless child! William Shakespeare
How these curiosities would be quite forgott, did not such idle fellowes as I putt them down. John Aubrey
How time flies, when you are in a heap of problems..
How to defend yourself against a Banana.
How to solve Mideast problems: DEL IRA*.*
How untasteful can you get?
How was Thomas J. Watson buried? 9 edge down.
How wonderful opera would be if there were no singers.
How ya like me now?
How you look depends a lot on where you go.
How you look depends on where you go.
How'm I flyin'?  Dial 1-800-BORG-YOU. | Borg
How's this for diplomacy?  Shoot them all  | Kirk
Howdy Doody had 48 freckles.
Howe's Law: Everyone has a scheme that will not work.
However gradual the course of history, there must always be the day, even an hour and minute, when some significant action is performed for the first or last time. Peter Quennell
However much we may distrust men's sincerity, we always believe they speak to us more sincerely than to others. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
However, never daunted, I will cope with adversity in my traditional manner ... sulking and nausea. | Tom K. Ryan
Howmanycharactersdoyouthinkyoucanfitintoonetaglineanyway?
Hug: A roundabout way of expressing affection.
Hugh Hefner is a virgin.
Huh?  What?  Am I on-line?
Human Being: An ingenious assembly of portable plumbing.
Human Intelligence. The greatest oxymoron ever
Human beings were created by water to transport it uphill.
Human brutes, like other beasts, find snares and poison in the provision of life, and are allured by their appetites to their destruction. Jonathan Swift
Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe. H. G. Wells
Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe. H.G. Wells
Human kindness has never weakened the stamina or softened the fiber of a free people. A nation does not have to be cruel in order to be tough. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
Human rights rest on human dignity. The dignity of man is an ideal worth fighting for and worth dying for. Robert Maynard
Human successes, like human failures, are composed of one action at a time and achieved by one person at a time. Patsy H. Sampson
Humanity Humanity to me is not a mob. A mob is a degeneration of humanity. A mob is humanity going the wrong way. Frank Lloyd Wright
Humanity either makes, or breeds, or tolerates all its afflictions. H. G. Wells
Humanity is a parisite
Humanity is never so beautiful as when praying for forgiveness, or else forgiving another. Jean Paul Richter
Humanity is the sin of God. Theodore Parker
Humans are unreliable, inefficient, often lazy, sometimes pregnant, liable to strike, need to be fed and paid, take up a lot of space and are slow by computer standards.
Humans: The species that should have never been...
Humble hearts have humble minds and they don't make good customers.
Hummingbirds never remember the words to songs.
Humor Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else. Will Rogers
Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law? Dick Clark, ageless music promoter, 1995
Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn. Irvin S. Cobb
Humor is the affectionate communication of insight. Leo Rosten
Humor is, I think, the subtlest and chanciest of literary forms. It is surely not accidental that there are a thousand novelists, essayists, poets or journalists for each humorist. It is a long, long time between James Thurbers Leo Rosten
Humorists...Those who can talk sensibly about a controversy.
Humpty Dumpty DOS - Just a shell of himself.
Humpty dumpty was pushed.
Hunger No one can worship God or love his neighbor on an empty stomach. Woodrow Wilson
Hunger does not breed reform; it breeds madness, and all the ugly distempers that make an ordered life impossible. Woodrow Wilson
Hunger never saw bad bread. -- Poor Richard.
Hungry men think the cook lazy.
Husband Husbands never become good; they merely become proficient. H. L. Mencken
Husband: what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted. Helen Rowland
Hydrogen and Stupidity - the two most common elements.
Hydrogen bombs make great party gags!
Hyphenate between syllables and avoid un-necessary hyphens.
Hypochondria is the only disease I haven't got.
Hypocrisy No man, for any considerable period, can wear one face to himself, and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be the true. Nathaniel Hawthorne
Hypocrisy is the Vaseline of social intercourse.
Hypocrisy is the homage that vice pays to virtue. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Hypocrisy is the type of homage vice pays to virtue.
Hypocrite: the man who murdered both his parents ... pleaded for mercy on the grounds that he was an orphan. Abraham Lincoln
Hlne... I just love you.
I  WP
I  WP 5.1
I  message database managers.
I **TRIED** to register it !
I *almost* stole a tagline I'm so ashamed
I *wish* I could remember where I parked my hard disk....
I AM RELAXED | Worf
I AM standing.
I BBS because no one can read my handwriting
I C, therefore I link (and think, and drink).
I C, therefore I link.
I DO NOT...I do not yell.  | Worf
I DON'T EAT ANYTHING WITH A FACE
I Disclaim All Warranties Of Merchantability.
I Feel Better Now.
I HATE it when it does that
I HATE it when that happens!
I Had A Life Once, Now I Have A Computer
I Have To Stop Now, My Fingers Are Getting Hoarse
I Have To Stop Now, My Fingers Are Getting Hoarse!
I I have seen the future and it works!
I Just can not resist a little fun along the way.  :-)
I M a tru beleever in hour edukashun sistum.
I PROMISE - I won't upload in your mouth!
I Print on Steel with an Industrial Laser
I Wonder What The Big Red Button Does....?
I [] CorelDRAW! v. 2.0 !
I [] My Cat.
I [] My Cat. I [] My Dog. (Would you [] my ex-wife ?)
I [] My Dog. I [] My Cat.
I [] My Dog. I [8] My Cat.
I [] QEdit!
I [] TheDraw v. 4.0!
I [] Ventura Publisher!
I ['d] My Dog. I ['d] My Cat.
I [8] you.
I accept reality and dare not question it. Walt Whitman
I added water, the oatmeal still tastes odd.... Oh, _HOT_ water!
I admit Dole would have the kids asleep earlier. Justin Schorr, NYC parent, on what it would be like to have Bob Dole as a fill-in parent, 1996
I admit it's offbeat, but lets not get hysterical.
I ain't a good spellir but I gots good grammers!!
I ain't got time to bleed.| Jesse Ventura
I almost stole a tagline! I'm so ashamed!
I always cheer up immensely if an attack is particularly wounding because I think, well, if they attack one personally, it means they have not a single political argument left., London Daily Telegraph, 3/21/86 Margaret Thatcher
I always considered statesmen to be more expendable than soldiers. Harry S Truman
I always felt rock and roll was very, very wholesome music. Aretha Franklin, queen of soul, 1995
I always get my muckin words fuddled
I always get the better when I argue alone. Oliver Goldsmith
I always like to try the one I've never tried before.
I always prefer to believe the best of everybodyit saves so much trouble. Rudyard Kipling
I always remember an epitaph which is in the cemetery at Toombstone, Arizona. It says: 'Here lies Jack Williams. He done his damnedest.' I think that is the greatest epitaph a man can have. Harry S Truman
I always say, as you know, that if my fellow citizens want to go to Hell I will help them. It's my job. Oliver Wendell Holmes
I always voted at my party's call, and I never thought of thinking for myself at all. Gilbert & Sullivan, from HMS Pinafore
I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific. Lilly Tomlin, actress, author and commedian
I am   ޺۳ݳݳ  --  Welcome to our NEW AGE !
I am Al of Borg. Aww, Peg, I assimilated you last year..
I am Borg ޺۳ݳݳ, who are you?
I am Burns of Borg. Smithers! Assimilate them!
I am Demtel of Borg. You will be assimilated...but WAIT! There's MORE!
I am Homer of Borg, prepare to ... ooohhh DOOONUTS!
I am Jordan of Borg. Gravity is irrelevant.
I am Keating of Borg. This is the assimilation we had to have.
I am Locutus of Borg.  Do you have any Grey Poupon?
I am Locutus of Borg. I demand Earl Grey tea - for 10000.
I am Ohm of Borg.  Resistance is relevant.
I am Pentium of Borg.  Prepare to be approximated.
I am Popeye of Borg. Prepare to be askimilgrated.
I am Ricki Lake of Borg. So, why did you assimilate your ex-boyfriend?
I am Shakespeare of Borg. Prepare to be, or not to be.
I am a computer. I am dumber than any human and smarter than any administrator.
I am a friend of the workingman, I would rather be his friend than be one. Clarence Darrow
I am a great believer in luck. The harder I work the more of it I seem to have. Coleman Cox
I am a man--nothing human is alien to me.
I am a man: nothing human is alien to me. | Terrence
I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house. Zsa Zsa Gabor
I am a part of all that I have met. Alfred Lord Tennyson
I am a part of all that I have met. Alfred, Lord Tennyson
I am a part of all that I have seen. Alfred Lord Tennyson
I am a person of color : my color is White.
I am a vampire.  Please wash your neck.
I am afraid [if the present trend in Vietnam continues] that direct confrontation, first of all between Washington and Peking, is inevitable. U Thant
I am afraid that is beyond my design parameters. | Data
I am always doing that which I can not do, in order that I may learn how to do it. Pablo Picasso, artist
I am an agnostic; I do not pretend to know what many ignorant men are sure of. Clarence Darrow
I am an optimistic pessimist.
I am become Death, the Destroyer of worlds | Oppenheimer
I am both of us & so are you.
I am calling from the Bermuda Tria{{{d~~{{{J~  NO CARRIER
I am certain that after the dust of centuries has passed over our cities, we, too, will be remembered not for victories or defeats in battle or in politics, but for our contribution to the human spirit. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
I am certain that, however great the hardships and the trials which loom ahead, our America will endure and the cause of human freedom will triumph. Cordell Hull
I am convinced that every boy, in his heart, would rather steal second base than an automobile. Thomas Campbell Clark
I am correct, the rest of you are wrong !
I am fond of childrenexcept boys. Lewis Carroll
I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.
I am free of prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
I am functioning within established parameters.
I am immortal, at least till I die.
I am in total control, but don't tell my wife.
I am looking for an honest man.
I am looking for an honest man.  | Diogenes (325 BC)
I am more afraid of alcohol than of all the bullets of the enemy. Gen. Stonewall Jackson
I am more bored than you could ever possibly be.  Go back to work.
I am mortified to be told that, in the United States of America, the sale of a book can become a subject of inquiry, and of criminal inquiry too. Thomas Jefferson
I am not a Merry Man! -- Worf
I am not a cat man, but a dog man, and all felines can tell this at a glance - a sharp, vindictive glance. James Thurber
I am not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing.
I am not a crook.
I am not a crook.| Richard Nixon
I am not a dictator.  It's just I have a grumpy face.
I am not a member of any organized partyI am a Democrat. Will Rogers
I am not a wimp.| George Bush
I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today.
I am not an animal!  I am ... well, not an animal.
I am not an animal.| Elephant Man
I am not arguing with you : I am telling you.
I am not arguing with you, I'm telling you.
I am not arguing with you; I am telling you
I am not asleep.| Ronald Reagan
I am not discriminatory, I hate everyone equally
I am not eccentric. It's just that I am more alive than most people. I am an unpopular electric ell set in a pond of goldfish. Dame Edith Sitwell
I am not now, and never have been, a girl friend of Henry Kissinger. | Gloria Steinem
I am not part of the problem; I am a Republican. | Vice President Dan Quayle
I am not young enough to know everything.
I am not young enough to know everything. James Matthew Barrie
I am not young enough to know everything. Oscar Wilde
I am only one, But still I am one. I cannot do everything, But still I can do something; And because I cannot do everything I will not refuse to do the something that I can do. Edward Everett
I am opposed to censorship. Censors are pretty sure fools. I have no confidence in the suppression of everyday facts. James Robinson
I am prejudiced in favor of him who, without impudence, can ask boldly. He has faith in humanity, and faith in himself. No one who is not accustomed to giving grandly can ask nobly and with boldness. Johann Kaspar Lavater
I am ready to meet my Maker.  Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter. | Winston Churchill
I am ready to meet my maker, but whether my maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter. Winston Churchill
I am serious.  And don't call me Shirley.
I am sweet and lovable at all times.
I am the future. | Senator Dan Quayle
I am the inferior of any man whose rights I trample under foot. Men are not superior by reason of the accidents of race or color. They are superior who have the best heartthe best brain. The superior man ... stands erect by bending above the fallen. He rises by lifting others. Robert Green Ingersoll
I am the inferior of any man whose rights I trample under foot. Robert Green Ingersoll
I am the mother of all things, and all things should wear a sweater.
I am their leader, which way did they go?
I am trying to do two things: dare to be a radical and not a fool, which is a matter of no small difficulty. James A. Garfield
I am wealthy in my friends.  -Shakespeare
I am ޺۳ݳݳ -- Welcome to our NEW AGE !
I am. Therefore, I think -- I think.
I am. Therefore, I think.  I think.
I am... Kirk... of Borg.  My... acting... is futile.
I apologise to the deaf for the loss of subtitles.
I appreciate your not breathing while I smoke
I attend Cedarupanz Flying School, Deadwood, MD.
I attribute the little I know to my not having been ashamed to ask for information, and to my rule of conversing with all descriptions of men on those topics that form their own peculiar professions and pursuits. John Locke
I bang my head against the wall cos it feels good when I stop.
I base my fashion taste on what doesn't itch. Gilda Radner
I be nibble, you be quick, he jumped over the Joystick.
I believe I will take this opportunity to remove my ears.
I believe in The Divine Right of SysOps.
I believe in a god which doesn't need heavy financing
I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers. Gandhi
I believe in free will - I have no choice!
I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean. | G. K. Chesterton
I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you dislike? Jean Cocteau
I believe in only one thing: liberty; but I do not believe in liberty enough to want to force it upon anyone. H. L. Mencken
I believe in the supreme worth of the individual and in his right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. John D. Rockefeller
I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality.| Martin Luther King
I believe the true function of age is memory. I'm recording as fast as I can. Rita Mae Brown
I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change.| Vice President Dan Quayle
I believe you are your work. Don't trade the stuff of your life, time, for nothing more than dollars. That's a rotten bargain. Rita Mae Brown
I belong to no organized party.  I am a Democrat.
I belong to no organized party.  I am a Democrat. | Will Rogers
I bet Patch drinks Carling Black Label!
I bet the human brain is a kludge. | Marvin Minsky
I bet you I could stop gambling.
I blinked, therefore I ran.
I bought a cordless extension cord.
I bought a dog the other day...I named him Stay. It's fun to call him...'Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!' He went insane. Now he just ignores me and keeps typing. Stephen Wright
I bought a house, on a one-way dead-end road; I don't know how I got there. Stephen Wright
I bought a self learning record to learn Spanish. I turned it on and went to sleep; the record got stuck. The next day I could only stutter in Spanish. Stephen Wright
I bought my brother some gift-wrap for Christmas. I took it to the Gift Wrap department and told them to wrap it, but in a different print so he would know when to stop unwrapping. Stephen Wright
I bought some powdered water, but I don't know what to add to it. Stephen Wright
I bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. Stephen Wright
I broke a mirror in my house. I'm supposed to get seven years of bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. Stephen Wright
I broke my arm trying to fold a bed. It wasn't the kind that folds. Stephen Wright
I call a fig a fig, a spade a spade. | Menander (292 BC)
I call my computer "Hole in the Desk"
I call things as I see them; If I didn't see them, I make them up!
I came to MIT to get an education for myself and a diploma for my mother.
I came, I saw, I confused.
I came, I saw, I took LOTS of PICTURES!
I came, I saw, She conquered. The original latin seems to have been garbled.
I came, I saw, she conquered -- Robert Anson Heinlein
I came. I saw. I charged it.
I came... I saw... I stole your tagline.
I can SPELL, I just can't TYPE worth a hoot
I can assure you that size will not be a problem. | Worf
I can be convinced of anything. With logic.
I can believe anything provided it is incredible. Oscar Wilde
I can do without essentials but I must have my luxuries
I can forgive, but I cannot forget, is only another way of saying, I will not forgive. Forgiveness ought to be like a cancelled notetorn in two, and burned up, so that it never can be shown against one. Henry Ward Beecher
I can hardly bear to watch.
I can honestly say that I was never affected by the question of the success of an undertaking. If I felt it was the right thing to do, I was for it regardless of the possible outcome. Golda Meir
I can jump black holes | Stephen Hawking
I can jump dictionareys | Dan Quayle
I can jump spreadsheets | Bill Gates
I can live for two months on a good compliment. Mark Twain
I can quit anytime I want; I just don't want to!
I can relate to that.
I can remember way back when a liberal was one who was generous with his money. Will Rogers
I can resist anything but temptation.
I can resist anything except temptation. Oscar Wilde
I can resist everything except temptation.
I can resist everything except temptation. - Oscar Wilde
I can see more on my knees than on my tiptoes
I can tell you are lying. Your lips are moving.
I can tell you're lying. Your lips are moving
I can tell you're lying. Your lips are moving.
I can usually judge a fellow by what he laughs at. Wilson Mizner
I can walk on water, but I stagger on alcohol.
I can write it perfectly. I just don't understand it.
I can't be overdrawn, I still have checks left!
I can't be overdrawn, I still have more checks
I can't be stupid, I completed third grade!
I can't begin to describe how happy I am.
I can't believe it's not air. Paul Schaffer, Musician, CBS Late Show bandleader, describing 'that stuff they make you breathe on airplanes', 1995
I can't believe it. I've heard of this disease.  Beverly
I can't believe my computer's on fire.
I can't complain, but sometimes I still do. | Joe Walsh
I can't drink a little, therefore I never touch it. Abstinance is as easy for me as tempreance would be difficult. Samuel Johnson
I can't hear you.  There's a banana republic in my ear.
I can't hear you. There's a banana republic in my ear.
I can't help it if I'm lucky...
I can't help showing my enthusiasm.
I can't reach the brakes on this piano
I can't reach the brakes on this piano!
I can't remember the last time I forgot something.
I can't stop thinking like this. Stephen Wright
I can't tell if I'm a kingpin or a pauper
I can't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of old ones. John Cage
I can't use Windows.  My cat ate my mouse.
I can't, Doctor. I might hurt you. | Worf
I cannot and will not cut my conscience to fit this year's fashions. Lillian Hellman
I cannot and will not cut my conscience to fit this year's fashions. | Lillian Hellman
I cannot spare the luxury of believing that all things beautiful are what they seem. Fitz-Greene Halleck
I carry a life size map of America in pocket. When people ask me where I'm from, I point to E - 5.| Stevie Wright
I chose my wife, as she did her wedding gown, for qualities that would wear well. Oliver Goldsmith
I cna ytpe 300 wrods pre mniuet!!!
I come unbundled.
I conceive that the great part of the miseries of mankind are brought upon them by false estimates they have made of the value of things. Benjamin Franklin
I conjure you, my brethren, to remain faithful to earth, and do not believe those who speak unto you of superterrestrial hopes! Poisoners they are, whether they know it or not. Friedrich Nietzsche
I could be arguing in my spare time.
I could be chasing an untamed ornithoid without cause.
I could have become a soldier if I had waited; I knew more about retreating than the man who invented retreating. Mark Twain
I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight. Mark Twain
I could never think well of a man's intellectual or moral character, if he was habitually unfaithful to his appointments. Nathaniel Emmons
I could not, at any age, be content to take my place by the fireside and simply look on. Life was meant to be lived. Curiousity must be kept alive. One must never, for whatever reason, turn his back on life. Eleanor Roosevelt
I could prove God statistically.
I couldn't care less about apathy.
I couldn't find the remote control to the remote control. Stephen Wright
I couldn't help it. I can resist everything except temptation. Oscar Wilde, from Lady Windermere's Fan
I couldn't possibly fail to disagree with you less.
I couldn't repair your brakes so I made your HORN louder.
I count him braver who conquers his desires than him who conquers his enemies; for the hardest victort is the victory over self. Aristotle
I cried because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no socks.
I cut down trees, I eat my lunch, I go to the lavatory.
I despise WINDOWS !
I despise the pleasure of despising people whom I despise.
I despise the pleasure of pleasing people whom I despise.
I did a picture in England one winter and it was so cold I almost got married. Shelley Winters
I did not win...I busted him up   Data
I didn't cheat, I just changed the Rules!
I didn't do anything. Unless I was supposed to.
I didn't do it. Nobody saw me. You can't prove anything !
I didn't get a toy train like the other kids. I got a toy subway instead. You couldn't see anything, but every now and then you'd hear this rumbling noise go by. Stephen Wright
I didn't get the documentation for the manuals!
I didn't know it was impossible when I did it.
I didn't know who or where I was, never felt better in my life!
I didn't mean to blow up the Academy - Wesley
I didn't say that I didn't say it. I said that I didn't say that I said it. I want to make that very clear. George Romney
I discourage a cult of personality. Newt Gingrich, US Congressman and House Speaker, 1995
I discovered I always have choices and sometimes it's pnly a choice of attitude. Judith M. Knowlton
I distinctly remember forgetting that.
I distrust camels and anyone else who can go a week without a drink. Joe E. Lewis
I divide all readers into two classes: those who read to remember and those who read to forget. William Lyon Phelps
I do desire we may be better strangers.
I do desire we may be better strangers. William Shakespeare
I do know a few things about anatomy, Jean-Luc. | Beverly
I do not believe in a fate that falls on men however they act; but I do believe in a fate that falls on them unless they act. Gilbert K. Chesterton
I do not fear computers.  I fear the lack of them.
I do not fear computers.  I fear the lack of them.| Isaac Asimov
I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use. | Galileo Galilei
I do not know anyone who has got to the top without hard work. That is the recipe. It will not always get you to the top, but should get you pretty near. Margaret Thatcher
I do not know myself, and God forbid that I should. | Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
I do not like broccoli. And I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it. And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli. George Bush, US president, 1990
I do not like this word bomb. It is not a bomb; it is a device which is exploding. Jacques Le Blanc, French ambassador to New Zealand, describing France's nuclear testing, 1995
I do not like work even when someone else does it. Mark Twain
I do not mind lying, but I hate inaccuracy. Samuel Butler
I do not participate in any sport with ambulances at the bottom of a hill. Erma Bombeck
I do not pretend to know what the ignorant are sure of.
I do not think that winning is the most important thing. I think winning is the only thing. Bill Veeck
I do this kind of stuff to him all through the picture.
I don't GET headaches, I GIVE them!
I don't believe in Beatles, I just believe in me.| John Lennon
I don't believe in astrology.  But then I'm an Aquarius, and Aquarians don't believe in astrology. | James R. F. Quirk
I don't believe in astrology. The only stars I can blame for my failures are those that walk about the stage.
I don't believe in principle, but I do in interest. James Russell Lowell
I don't care how much of a lama he is, he still needs his mother. Maria Torres, Spanish woman whose 10-year-old son is believed by Tibetan monks to be a reincarnated lama, 1995
I don't care what is written about me so long as it isn't true. Katharine Hepburn
I don't care what they call me as long as they mention my name. George M. Cohan
I don't even now how to use a parking meter, let alone a phone box. Diana, english princess, 1994
I don't get no respect.
I don't have a drinking problem.     I drink,    I get drunk,    I fall down,    No problem.
I don't have a life, I have a BBS.
I don't have a solution but I admire the problem.
I don't have a solution but I really admire the problem.
I don't have any taglines to give you.  Go away.
I don't have to take this abuse from you -- I've got hundreds of people waiting to abuse me. | Bill Murray, "Ghostbusters"
I don't just sweat. I rain. Charlie Talbot, the title character from the movie Angus, 1995
I don't just tempt fate - I give it the finger.
I don't kill my enemies: I slime them | Odo
I don't know and I don't care.
I don't know exactly what democracy is. But we need more of it. (Anonymous Chinese Student), during protests in Tianamen Square, Beijing, 1989
I don't know how I got here...
I don't know if there are men on the moon, but if there are they must be using the earth as their lunatic asylum. George Bernard Shaw
I don't know much about panda bears, Number One.| Picard
I don't know of a single foreign product that enters this country untaxed, except the answer to prayer. Mark Twain
I don't know what I like, but I know what art is.
I don't know what a scoundrel is like, but I know what a respectable man is like, and it's enough to make one's flesh creep. Joseph de Maistre
I don't know what will be used in the next world war, but the 4th will be fought with stones. A. Einstein
I don't know whether war is an interlude during peace, or peace is an interlude during war. Georges Clemenceau
I don't know who my grandfather was; I am much more concerned to know what his grandson will be. Abraham Lincoln
I don't know, I'm making this up as I go.| Indiana Jones/Adrian Lake
I don't know. I don't care. And it doesn't make any difference.
I don't lie, cheat or steal unnecessarily.|Bumper sticker
I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting. Andy Rooney
I don't like spinach, and I'm glad I don't, because if I liked it I'd eat it, and I just hate it. | Clarence Darrow
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hellyou see, I have friends in both places. Mark Twain
I don't make much sense because the rest of the world doesn't either.
I don't mind what language an opera is sung in so long as it is a language I don't understand. Sir Edward Appleton
I don't need a disclaimer. I OWN the company.
I don't object to sex before marriage, but two minutes before??
I don't remember ever having had the itch, and yet scratching is one of nature's sweet pleasures, and so handy.
I don't say we all ought to misbehave, but we ought to look as if we could. Orson Welles
I don't say what God is, but a name That somehow answers us when we are driven To feel and think how little we have to do With what we are. Edwin Arlington Robinson
I don't steal taglines -- I replicate them.
I don't steal taglines, I replicate them.
I don't think I shall ever get over this. Leigh Hunt, last words
I don't think much of a man who is not wiser today than he was yesterday. Abraham Lincoln
I don't think necessity is the mother of invention. Invention, in my opinion, arises directly from idleness, possibly also from laziness - to save oneself trouble. Agatha Christie
I don't understand the appeal of Spuds McKenzie. He's always surrounded by beautiful women. Now, I'm single, and I know the pickin's can be mighty slim, but you have to be really desperate to date out of your own species. Susan Norfleet
I don't understand you anymore.
I don't want it Now, or Right Now, I want it YESTERDAY !
I don't want it now, I want it RIGHT now!
I don't want life to imitate art. I want life to be art. Carrie Fisher
I don't want the world, I just want your half.
I don't want to be a cynic, but it's hard...
I don't want to be a geniusI have enough problems just trying to be a man. Albert Camus
I don't want to describe the hate mail we've gotten. Alma Powell, Colin's wife, on why she was fearful of her husban running for president, from an interview in the Ladies Home Journal, 1996
I don't want to die at 40.| J. Lennon
I don't want to think.  I just want to be...
I dont nead no speling cheker !
I dote on his very absence.
I doublespaced my cat and now it sleeps 48 hours a day.
I drank what?? ~ Socrates
I drink to make other people interesting.
I em a wuunderfull spelur.  I tipe vari gud two.
I enjoy the time that we spend together.
I fear God, and next to God I chiefly fear him who fears Him not. Saadi
I fear Greeks even when they bring gifts.| Virgil (19 BC)
I fear explanations explanatory of things explained.
I fear you must blame your own perverse urges. | Picard
I feel almost happy.
I feel coming on a strange diseasehumility. Frank Lloyd Wright
I feel fine.....Everything seems a little smaller.  | Picard
I feel like a fugitive from the law of averages.
I feel more like I do now than I did before.
I feel so good I could do a week's work this afternoon.
I feel so inar-inar-inar tic-u-late
I feel that the greatest reward for doing is the opportunity to do more. Jonas Salk
I feel we are all islands - in a common sea. Anne Morrow Lingbergh
I figure I'm pretty good with the bullshit but I love listening to an expert. Keep talking.
I figure I'm pretty good with the bullshit, but I love listening to an expert. Keep talking
I figure that my psychic should know when to call me.
I filled out an application that said, 'In Case Of Emergency Notify'.I wrote 'Doctor'...What's my mother going to do? Stephen Wright
I finally got it all together, but forgot where I put it.
I find it hard to restrain my enthusiasm.
I find it rather easy to protray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.
I find myself beside a stream of empty thought
I find push buttons very depressing......
I find that the further I go back, the better things, whether they happened or not. Mark Twain
I find the great thing in this world is not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are moving: To reach the port of heaven, we must sail sometimes with the wind and sometimes against it, but we must sail, and not drift, nor lie at anchor. Oliver Wendell Holmes
I firmly believe that if the whole materia medica could be sunk to the bottom of the sea, it would be all the better for mankind, and all the worse for the fishes. Oliver Wendell Holmes
I float like an anchor and sting like a moth.
I forget
I forgot all about the Amnesia Conference!!
I fought the lawn and the lawn won.
I found Rome a city of bricks and left it a city of marble.
I found the tests quite elementary.  Data
I gave it up until Lent
I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it. | Mae West
I get mail........ I exist.
I give advice worth the price....free!
I got a new shadow. I had to get rid of the other one...it wasn't doing what I was doing. Stephen Wright
I got arrested in LA and boy am I beat!
I got it all together, then forgot where I put it.
I got lost in thought. It was an unfamiliar territory.
I got my driver's license photo taken out of focus on purpose. Now when I get pulled over the cop looks at it (moving it nearer and farther, trying to see it clearly)...and says, 'Here, you can go.' Stephen Wright
I got my mojo wholesale.
I got up early today so as to have even more time to enjoy myself.
I got up one morning and couldn't find my socks, so I called Information. She said, 'Hello, Information.' I said, 'I can't find my socks.' She said, 'They're behind the couch.' And they were! Stephen Wright
I grow old, I grow old... I wear the bottom of my trousers rolled.
I guess a cynic smells different.
I guess the only way to stop divorce is to stop marriage. Will Rogers
I had a dislocated funny bone, <OUCH> but it's better now
I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car. Stephen Wright
I had a handle on life, but it broke.
I had a life once... Now I have a computer.
I had a life once... but now I have a modem.
I had grown tired of standing in the lean and lonely front line facing the greatest enemy that ever confronted manpublic opinion. Clarence Darrow
I had it all, and I blew it. Mickey Mantle, baseball player, shortly before dying from cancer and other complications of alcoholism, 1995
I had just received my degree in Calcium Anthropology...the study of milkmen. Stephen Wright
I had my head examined.  They didn't find *anything*!
I had no idea this thing was televised. Boy, is my face red. David Letterman, after doing a less-than-wonderful job of hosting the Academy Awards, 1995
I had one just like it.... only different.
I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street when suddenly the prescription ran out. Stephen Wright
I happen to be a Republican president- ah, the vice president.| Vice President Dan Quayle
I hate making predictions; especially about the future
I hate making predictions; especially about the future!
I hate quotations. Tell me what you know.
I hate quotations.| Ralph Waldo Emerson
I hate television. I hate it as much as peanuts. But I can't stop eating peanuts. Orson Welles
I hate the man who builds his name on the ruins of another's fame. John Gay
I hate to see things done by halves. If it be right, do it boldly-if it be wrong leave it undone. Bernard Gilpin
I hate war as only a soldier who has lived it can, only as one who has seen its brutality, its futility, its stupidity. Dwight D. Eisenhower
I have a 9600bps modem and 1.5bps fingers
I have a cunning plan | Baldric from BlackAdder (I - IV)
I have a dream:  DIR C: 965,465,065,464,984,030,373,436 bytes free...
I have a feeling this isn't Kansas, Bozo !
I have a feeling this isn't Kansas, Toto!
I have a firm grip on reality. Now I can strangle it.
I have a firm grip on reality. Now I can strangle it...
I have a great deal of company in the house, especially in the morning when nobody calls. Henry David Thoreau
I have a mind like a steel...uh...thingamajig...
I have a photographic memory, but I keep forgetting to put the film in.| Peter Campbell
I have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up. Mark Twain
I have a really good memory, except it's short.
I have a simple philosophy: Fill what's empty. 	Empty what's full. Scratch where it itches. | A. R. Longworth
I have a speech impediment... my foot.
I have a speech impediment....my foot
I have already not made that point
I have also seen children successfully surmounting the effects of an evil inheritance. That is due to purity being an inherent attribute of the soul. Mahatma Gandhi
I have always had a dread of becoming a passenger in life. Margareth II, Queen of Denmark
I have always said that a conference was held for one reason only, to give everybody chance to get sore at everybody else. Sometimes it takes two or three conferences to scare up a war, but generally one will do it. Will Rogers
I have always thought that every woman should marry, and no man. Benjamin Disraeli
I have an answering machine in my car. It says, 'I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out.' Stephen Wright
I have been thinking that I would make a proposition to my Republican friends.... That if they will top telling lies about the Democrats, we will stop telling the truth about them. Adlai E. Stevenson
I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided; and that is the lamp of experience. I know of no way of judging the future but by the past. Patrick Henry
I have come to the conclusion that politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.| Charles de Gaulle
I have decided to devote my entire career to looking for a career.
I have discovered the art of deceiving diplomats. I speak the truth, and they never believe me. Camillo di Cavour
I have dynamic memory : it needs refreshing.
I have found power in the mysteries of thought.| Euripides
I have found some of the best reasons I ever had for remaining at the bottom simply by looking at the men at the top. Frank Moore Colby
I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it. Harry S Truman
I have given my pain a name..!!
I have hardly ever known a mathematician who was capable of reasoning.
I have learned To spell hors d'oeuvres Which still grates on  Some people's n'oeuvres. | Warren Knox
I have lost everything, and I am so poor now that I really cannot afford to let anything worry me. Joseph Jefferson
I have made good judgments in the Past. I have made good judgments in the Future. | Vice President Dan Quayle
I have made mistakes but I have never made the mistake of claiming that I have never made one. | James Gordon Bennett
I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter.| Blaise Pascal
I have never accepted what many people have kindly saidnamely that I inspired the nation. Their will was resolute and remorseless, and as it proved, unconquerable. It fell to me to express it., on his 80th birthday, address to Parliament 11/30/54 Sir Winston Churchill
I have never advocated war except as a means of peace. Ulysses S. Grant
I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did. Jeff Foxworthy, commedian, 1995
I have never in my life learned anything from any man who agreed with me. Dudley Field Malone
I have never known a man who was sensual in his youth, who was high-minded when old. Charles Sumner
I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
I have never let my schooling interfere with my education. Mark Twain
I have never seen pessimism in a Company prospectus. Sir William Connor (Cassandra)
I have no regrets. I wouldn't have lived my life the way I did if I was going to worry about what people were going to say. Ingrid Bergman
I have no time for monks resisting the carnival.
I have no use for men who fail. The cause of their failure is no business of mine, but I want successful men as my associates. John D. Rockefeller
I have not yet begun to fight. John Paul Jones
I have noticed that the people who are late are often so much jollier than the people who have to wait for them. E.V. Lucas
I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.
I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. Anonymous
I have one criticism about the Negro troops who fought under my command in the Korean War. They didn't send me enough of them. Douglas MacArthur
I have one nerve left and you're getting on it...
I have one word for you, Mrs. Troi: VD.  Look into it.
I have only one ambition left: I should like to have a good epitaph. Prince Bismark
I have only one yardstick by which I test every major problem, and that yardstick is: Is it good for America? Dwight D. Eisenhower
I have seen gross intolerance shown in support of tolerance. Samuel Taylor Coleridge
I have seen the data. Now bring me some I can agree with.
I have seen the evidence.  I want DIFFERENT evidence!
I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.
I have seen the future and it is now the past.
I have seen the truth and it makes no sense.
I have something BETTER than chocolate. | Riker
I have suffered too much in this world not to hope for another. Jean Jacques Rousseau
I have sworn upon the altar of God, eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man. Thomas Jefferson
I have the simplest tastes.  I am always satisfied with the best.| Oscar Wilde
I have the world's largest collection of seashells. I keep it on all the beaches of the world...perhaps you've seen it. Stephen Wright
I have to stop now.  My fingers are getting hoarse.
I have too great a soul to die like a criminal. John Wilkes Booth
I have two very rare photographs. One is a picture of Houdini locking his keys in his car. The other is a rare photograph of Norman Rockwell beating up a child. Stephen Wright
I haven't laughed so much since yesterday.
I haven't lost my mind -- it's backed up on tape somewhere.
I haven't lost my mind, I know exactly where I left it.
I haven't lost my mind. It's backed up somewhere !
I hear what you're saying but I just don't care.
I hit the CTRL key but I'm still not in control!
I hold every man a debtor to his profession. Francis Bacon
I hold it true, whate'er befall; I feel it, when I sorrow most; 'Tis better to have loved and lost Than never to have loved at all. Alfred, Lord Tennyson
I hold, as an article of faith, that the worth of an organisation can be accurately measured as the reciprocal of how many 'Hollywood beautiful people' it attracts. It has never failed me yet. Barry Williams (the Skeptic of Oz)
I honestly believe it is better to know nothing than to know what ain't so. Josh Billings
I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. Stephen Wright
I hope I'm that frail when I am 202 years old.  Picard
I idiot-proof my programs,but along comes a bigger idiot.
I installed a skylight in my apartment....The people who live above me are furious! Stephen Wright
I is a university student.|Bumper sticker
I is knot dain bramaged
I is knot dain bramaged!
I just bought a cured ham. Wonder what it had?
I just bought a microwave fireplace... You can spend an evening in front of it in only eight minutes... Stephen Wright
I just gotta write some new taglines...
I just hate it when it does that !!
I just picked up a book called "Glue in Many Lands" and I can't put it down.
I just play here.
I just steal 'em, I don't explain 'em.
I just steal them, I don't write them.
I keep my .BAT files in D:\BELFRY
I keep six honest serving-men [They taught me all I knew]; Their names are What and Why and When And How and Where and Who Rudyard Kipling
I kew a girl, she was a macho man.
I know I'm lucky. I always have been.
I know I'm not in government anymore. In fact I'm out of work. Ronald Reagan-US president, on a speaking tour of Japan, 1989
I know a good tag line when I steal one
I know and I know you know I know.
I know but one freedom and that is the freedom of the mind. Antoine de Saint-Exupry
I know enough about the World, to know that I don't want to know anything more.| Sly
I know everything about everything, except that.
I know it all. I just can't remember it all at once.
I know karate, kung-fu, and 47 other dangerous words.
I know my Republican friends were glad to see my wife feeding an elephant in India. She gave him sugar and nuts. But of course the elephant wasn't satisfied. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
I know on which side my bread is buttered.
I know on which side my bread is buttered. |  John Heywood
I know so little, but I know it fluently...
I know that a man who shows me his wealth is like the beggar who shows me his poverty; they are both looking for alms from me, the rich man for the alms of my envy, the poor man for the alms of my guilt. Ben Hecht
I know that the Lord is always on the side of the right. But it is my constant anxiety and prayer that I and this nation should be on the Lord's side. Abraham Lincoln
I know what pleasure is, for I have done good work. Robert Louis Stevenson
I know where the Second Foundation really is!
I know you think you understood what I said, but what you heard was not what I meant.
I like Boolean logic. NOT
I like a friend better for having faults that one can talk about. William Hazlitt
I like a nice display, so I don't use just any two-bit video card ...
I like being single.  I'm always there when I need me. | Art Leo
I like bubbles and the whole thing. That's the fun of taking a bath. Earvin 'Magic' Johnson, basketball virtuoso, on his new Magic's Elixir Bubble Bath, 1996
I like candy, especially the gooey kind with nougat!
I like children, if they are properly cooked.
I like children. Properly cooked. W.C. Fields
I like it better in the dark.
I like kids, but I don't think I could eat a whole one.
I like my steak MIDIum rare...
I like my steak so rare a good Vet. could save it.
I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past. Patrick Henry
I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past. Thomas Jefferson
I like to fill my tub up with water, then turn the shower on and act like I'm in a submarine that's been hit. Stephen Wright
I like to go to art museums and name the untitled paintings...Boy With Pail...Kitten On Fire. Stephen Wright
I like to leave messages *before* the beep.
I like to reminisce with people I don't know.
I like to reminisce with people I don't know. Stephen Wright
I like to skate on the other side of the ice. Stephen Wright
I like to think of myself as a divide overflow.
I like two kinds of women: domestic and foreign.
I like women with big... HEARTS!  YEAH! THAT's it!
I like work... I can sit and watch it for hours.
I like work; It fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours. Jerome K. Jerome
I like work; it fascinates me; I can sit and look at it for hours.
I like work; it fascinates me; I can watch it for hours.
I like your approach, now let's see your departure.
I like your game but we have to change the rules.
I listened, motionless and still; And, as I mounted up the hill, The music in my heart I bore, Long after it was heard no more. William Wordsworth
I live in a house, but belong in a HOME.
I live in a quiet neighborhood -- We use silencers.
I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity. Albert Einstein
I live the life of Riley...when Riley isn't home.
I look better on a woman!
I look on that man as happy, who, when there is a question of success, looks into his work for a reply. Ralph Waldo Emerson
I look upon life as a gift from God. I did nothing to earn it. Now that the time is coming to give it back, I have no right to complain. Joyce Cary
I lost a button hole today.
I lost a button hole today. Stephen Wright
I lost my knickers at Niagara.
I love Americans, but not when they try to talk French. What a blessing it is that they never try to talk English. Saki (H. H. Munro)
I love California; I practically grew up in Phoenix. |  Vice President Dan Quayle
I love New York!     * * *       No Radio
I love a hand that meets my own with a grasp that causes some sensation. Samuel Osgood
I love acting. It is so much more real than life. Oscar Wilde
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. Rita Rudner
I love happy faces ! Don't you ?
I love mankind, It's the people I can't stand.
I love my computer. It's made in Taiwan
I love my job! I love my job! I love my job! I love my...
I love the smell of Napalm in the morning... | Colonel Kilgore
I love to go shopping. I love to freak out salespeople. They ask me if they can help me, and I say, 'Have you got anything I'd like?' Then they ask me what size I need, and I say, 'Extra medium.' Stephen Wright
I love to think of nature as an unlimited broadcasting station, through which God speaks to us every hour, if we only will tune in. George Washington Carver
I love treason but hate a traitor.
I made it foolproof, but they're making better fools...
I made it foolproof. They are making better fools!
I made wine out of raisins so I wouldn't have to wait for it to age. Stephen Wright
I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell this to my children they just about throw up. Barbara Bush, first lady, 1989
I may be compelled to face danger, but never fear it, and while our soldiers can stand and fight, I can stand and feed and nurse them. Clara Barton
I may be getting older, but I refuse to grow up
I may be lost, but I'm way ahead of schedule.
I may be stupid, but that still makes me smarter than you.
I may have my faults, but being wrong ain't one of them.
I may have settled in shipping.
I may not always be perfect, but I'm always me.
I may not be perfect, but I am all I got!
I may not be perfect, but parts of me are excellent.
I may not be right, but I'm never wrong!
I maybe fat, but your ugly-and I can lose weight!
I met this wonderful girl at Macy's. She was buying clothes and I was putting Slinkies on the escalator. Stephen Wright
I mistrust the judgment of every man in a case in which his own wishes are concerned. First Duke of Wellington
I multitask... I read in the bathroom !
I must be BLIND because I sure don't 'C'.
I must govern the clock, not be governed by it. Golda Meir
I must have a rapier wit; everyone keeps parrying.
I must have slipped a disk - my pack hurts.
I must have slipped a disk -- my pack hurts
I must have slipped a disk; my pack hurts.
I must hurry, for there they go and I am their leader.
I must respect the opinions of others even if I disagree with them. Herbert Henry Lehman
I must tell you that the supply of words on the world market is plentiful, but the demand is falling. Lech Walesa, forklift repairman and president of Poland, speech to US Congress,1989
I mustanottagottalotta sleep last night.
I ne d a n w ke bo  d.
I need Windows like a haemophiliac needs heart surgery
I need a practice target... Wesley! * Worf
I need some duck tape. My duck has a quack in it.
I need some new taglines. This one is getting old.
I need someone really bad.  Are you really bad?|Bumper sticker
I need to know the price of a gallon of milk and a dozen eggs. I need to know right now. Lamar Alexander, former governer and presidential candidate, campaigning in New Hampshire, 1996
I never buy books on impulse. Only on warp.
I never dared be radical when young for fear it would make me conservative when old. Robert Frost
I never deny, I never contradict. I sometimes forget.
I never did it that way before.
I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they do now. Will Rogers
I never fail to convince an audience that the best thing they could do was to go away.
I never found a companion that was so companionable as solitude. Henry David Thoreau
I never give them hell; I just tell the truth and they think it's hell. Harry S. Truman
I never give them hell; I just tell them the truth and they think it is hell. Harry S. Truman
I never go out unless I look like Joan Crawford the movie star. If you want to see the girl next door, go next door. Joan Crawford
I never knew I had so many friends.
I never knew how to worship until I knew how to love. Henry Ward Beecher
I never let school get in the way of my education.
I never liked you, and I always will.
I never loved another person the way I loved myself. Mae West
I never make the mistake of arguing with people for whose opinions I have no respect. Edward Gibbon
I never met a Lasagna I didn't like !
I never met a chocolate I didn't like!
I never met a man I didn't like. Will Rogers
I never met a piece of chocolate I didn't like.
I never metaphysics I didn't like.
I never once made a discovery ... I speak without exaggeration that I have constructed three thousand different theories in connection with the electric light ... Yet in only two cases did my experiments prove the truth of my theory. Thomas A. Edison
I never realised that FORTRAN was so exciting.
I never refuse. I contradict. I sometimes forget. Benjamin Disraeli
I never rise above the noise and confusion...
I never said all actors are cattle; what I said was all actors should be treated like cattle. Alfred Hitchcock
I never take my own side in a quarrel. Robert Frost
I never think he is quite ready for another world who is altogether weary of this. Hugh Hamilton
I never think of the future. It comes soon enough. Albert Einstein
I never thought much of the courage of a lion-tamer. Inside the cage he is at least safe from people. George Bernard Shaw
I never trust a fighting man who doesnt smoke or drink. Adm William Halsey
I never yet heard man or woman much abused that I was not inclined to think the better of them, and to transfer the suspicion or dislike to the one who found pleasure in pointing out the defects of another. Jane Porter
I not only use all the brains I have, but all that I can borrow. Woodrow Wilson
I now know how Abbot felt when Costello left, how Brinkley felt when Huntley left, how Sears felt when Roebuck left, and, of course, how Dan Rather felt when Connie left. Jim Lehrer, News Analyst, at Robert MacNeil's retirement dinner, 1995
I object to sex on TV. I keep falling off !
I often daydream about my inability to fantasize.
I often wish ... that I could rid the world of the tyranny of facts. What are facts but compromises? A fact merely marks the point where we have agreed to let investigation cease. Anon.
I only counted 100 dalmatians...
I only have to open my mouth and jolly thoughts pour out.
I only like two kinds of women: domestic and foreign.
I only regret that I have but one life to give for my country. Nathan Hale
I only wrote the thing, I don't have to understand it!
I owe, I owe, it's off to work I go.
I parked my hard disk and now I can't find it!
I parked my harddisk - and got a ticket!
I passed my ethics course. I cheated, of course.
I personally think we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain. Jane Wagner
I personally think we developed language because of our deep need to complain. Lily Tomlin
I photocopied a mirror. Now I have an extra photocopier.
I pity the man who wants a coat so cheap that the man or woman who produces the cloth will starve in the process. Benjamin Harrison
I place economy among the first and most important virtues, and public debt as the greatest of dangers ... We must make our choice between economy and liberty, or profusion and servitude. If we can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the Thomas Jefferson
I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window. Stephen Wright
I played poker w/ tarot cards-got a flush & 5 people died
I played poker with tarot cards: got a flush and five people died. ___
I plugged my phone in where the blender used to be. I called someone. They went 'Aaaaahhhh...' Stephen Wright
I post.......... I am
I postpone death by living, by suffering, by error, by risking, by giving, by losing. Anaias Nin
I practice moderation to excess.
I practice safe eating...I use condiments.
I prefer credulity to skepticism and cynicism for there is mo promise in almost anything than in nothing at all. Ralph Barton Perry
I prefer the company of equals. | Riker
I profoundly believe it takes a lot of practice to become a moral slob. | William F. Buckley
I program, therefore I exist.
I promise results, not promises.
I put a new engine in my car, but didn't take the old one out. Now my car goes 500 miles an hour. The harmonica sounds *amazing*. Stephen Wright
I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. Stephen Wright
I put hardwood floors on top of wall-to-wall carpet. Stephen Wright
I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. Stephen Wright
I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. 'It was supposed to be hot today.' Stephen Wright
I put spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone ...
I read comic books all day lon%$#^ NO CAREER
I read part of it.. all the way through.
I read the news today, Oh boy...| John Lennon
I realize that there are many people in this world who do not love their fellow human beings, and I hate people like that
I really hate this damned machine I wish that they would sell it. It never does quite what I want But only what I tell it.
I really think that sex always looks kind of funny in a movie. William Friedkin, Director, 1995
I refuse to admit I'm more than fifty-two, even if that does make my sons illegitimate. Lady Astor
I refuse to admit that I am more than fifty-two, even if that does make my sons illegitimate. Lady Astor
I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent.
I refuse to have a battle of wits, with an unarmed opponent.
I remember me... I think.
I remember the words. I don't understand.
I remember when Saturns were rockets, not cars.
I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights. Now it looks like I'm the only one moving. Stephen Wright
I respect faith, but doubt is what gets you an education. Wilson Mizner
I rose by sheer military ability to the rank of corporal. Thornton Wilder
I run a clean place.  Guinan
I said a BUD LIGHT." - J. d',"'Arc
I said copy the disk - not xerox it!
I saw Elvis.  He sat between me and Bigfoot on the UFO.
I saw a bank that said '24 Hour Banking', but I don't have that much time. Stephen Wright
I saw a close friend of mine the other day...He said, 'Stephen, why haven't you called me?' I said, 'I can't call everyone I want. My new phone has no five on it.' He said, 'How long have you had it?' I said, 'I don't know...my calendar has no sevens on it.' Stephen Wright
I saw a light at the end of the tunnel - it was a train.
I saw a lot of trees today ; and they were made of wood.
I saw a sign at a gas station. It said 'help wanted'. There was another sign below it that said 'self service'. So I hired myself. Then I made myself the boss. I gave myself a raise. I paid myself. Then I quit. Stephen Wright
I saw a sign: 'Rest Area 25 Miles'. That's pretty big. Some people must be really tired. Stephen Wright
I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second. Stephen Wright
I saw a tree fall in the woods, and I didn't hear it. Stephen Wright
I saw a werewolf drinking a pina colada at Trader Vic's ...
I saw what you did and I know who you are.
I saw, I came, I cleaned it up.
I say, beware of all enterprises that require new clothes, and not rather a wearer of new clothes. Henry David Thoreau
I see further by standing on the shoulders of giants.| Sir Isaac Newton
I see the President and the First Lady are not here - probably someplace testifying. Don Imus, at the Broadcaster's Hall of Fame banquet, shortly after being criticised for his not-quite-reprintable humor at teh Clinton's expense, 1996
I see the eigenvalue in thine eye, I hear the tender tensor in thy sigh. Bernoulli would have been content to die Had he but known such a-squared cos 2(phi) | Stanislaw Lem, "Cyberiad"
I see you're not one of our registered dealers...| Ramon Legnaghi
I see, therefore I scan.
I sense... *SLAP*  Not while we're on the bridge, Will
I sentence you to hang by the neck until you cheer up.
I seriously doubt if we will ever have another war. This is probably the very last one. Richard M. Nixon
I shall need to sleep three weeks on end to get rested from the rest I've had. Thomas Mann
I shall never permit myself to stoop so low as to hate any man. Booker T. Washington
I shave with Occam's Razor.
I sighed as a lover, I obeyed as a child.
I smell a rat.  Did you bake it or fry it?
I smell a rat. Did you bake it or fry it?
I snatch kisses. (and vice versa)
I spilled spot remover on my dog and now he's gone.
I spilled spot remover on my dog. He's gone now. Stephen Wright
I squirm when I see athletes praying before a game. Don't they realize that if God took sports seriously he never would have created George Steinbrenner. Mark Russel
I stand by all the misstatements that I've made. | Vice President Dan Quayle
I started out with nothing. I still have most of it. Davis.
I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. Stephen Wright
I steer my bark with hope in the head, leaving fear astern. My hopes indeed sometimes fail, but not oftener than the forebodings of the gloomy. Thomas Jefferson, 1816
I still miss my ex-wife - but my aim is improving
I still miss my ex-wife -- but my aim is improving !
I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. Shirley Temple Black, actress, singer, and US ambassador
I suggest a new strategy, R2.  Let the Wookiee win.
I support MERIT PAY for Politicians.
I support drug tests. Test the politicians.
I suppose Paradise must be like this.
I survived the Phoenix Sun. It's a dry heat. Yah Sure!
I survived torture.  I'm ready to date Lwaxana. | Picard
I take as my guide the hope of a saint: in crucial things, unity, in important things, diversity, in all things, generosity. George Bush-US President, Inaugural Address, 1989
I take it to be a principle rule of life, not to be too much addicted to any one thing. Terence
I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home. Robert Orben
I taught I taw a puddy tat.| Tweety
I teach that all men are mad. Horace
I tell people I'm too stupid to know what's impossible. I have ridiculously large dreams, and half the time they come true. Debi Thomas US and World figure skating champion, Olympic bronze medalist, and third year medical student, 1996
I tell them there's no problems...Only Solutions...
I tell you that as long as I can conceive something better than myself I cannot be easy unless I am striving to bring it in to existence or clearing the way for it. George Bernard Shaw
I tell you the past is a bucket of ashes. Carl Sandburg
I thank God for my handicaps, for through them, I have found myself, my work and my God. Helen Keller
I thank fate for having made me born poor. Poverty taught me the true value of the gifts useful to life. Anatole France
I thank my lucky stars I'm not superstitious.
I think ... therefore I am overqualified.
I think I am better than the people who are trying to reform me. Ed Howe
I think I could fall madly in bed with you.
I think I strained a muscle I didn't know I had!
I think I think, therefore I might be.
I think I think, therefore I think I am.  I think.
I think I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
I think I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
I think I've got a headache.....
I think a SysOp Needs Nine Lives - I need ten.
I think and think for months and years. Ninety-nine times, the conclusion is false. The hundredth time I am right. Albert Einstein
I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers. Anonymous
I think he's a couple bushels shy of a full crop
I think he's a couple keys short of a concert piano.
I think he's a couple of cans short of a six-pack.
I think he's a couple of ticks past the noon whistle.
I think he's a couple sharps short of B Major.
I think he's a few bars short of a finished symphony.
I think he's a few bricks short of a whole wall.
I think he's a few bytes short of a checksum.
I think he's a few channels short of Basic Cable
I think he's a few croutons short of a garden salad.
I think he's a few pipes short of a church organ.
I think he's a few strings short of a violin section.
I think he's one taco short of a combination platter
I think he's playing his oboe with just one reed.
I think he's playing solitaire with a pinochle deck.
I think he's playing the lead violin part on a viola.
I think he's playing the old five-string guitar.
I think most of the people involved in any art always secretly wonder whether they are really there because they're good - or because they're lucky. Katharine Hepburn
I think one of the great problems we have in the Republican Party is that we don't encourage you to be nasty. We encourage you to be neat, obedient, loyal and faithful and all those Boy Scout words, which would be great around a campfire but are lousy in politics. Newt Gingrich, House Speaker,1994
I think one of the reasons I'm popular again is because I'm wearing a tie. You have to be different. Tony Bennet, singer, 1994
I think sex is better than logic, but I can't prove it.
I think that I shall never see A billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall I'll never see a tree at all. | Ogden Nash
I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree.
I think that the team that wins game five will win the series. Unless we lose game five. Charles Barkley, making NBA playoff predictions, 1994
I think that we may safely trust a good deal more than we do. We may waive just so much care of ourselves as we honestly bestow elsewhere. Henry David Thoreau
I think that, as life is action and passion, it is required of a man that he should share the passion and action of his time at peril of being judged not to have lived. Oliver Wendell Holmes
I think the most uncomfortable thing about martyrs is that they look down on people who aren't. Samuel N. Behrman
I think the phrase rhymes with Clucking Bell
I think there are only three things America will be known for 2,000 years from now when they study this civilization: the Constitution, jazz music, and baseball. Gerald Early, writer, baseball documentary, 1994
I think there is only one quality worse than hardness of heart and that is softness of head. Theodore Roosevelt
I think there is only one quality worse than hardness of heart, and that is softness of head. Theodore Roosevelt
I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered at the White Housewith the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
I think we must make love on the front lawn like crazed weasels NOW|Pick up line
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
I think we're back to normality at last.
I think we're in trouble.
I think, therefore I am on-line.
I think, therefore I am overqualified.
I think, therefore I am paid.
I think, therefore I am.  I think.
I think, therefore I am. (Or am I?)
I think, therefore I am... dangerous, that is...
I think, therefore I scan.
I think, therefore I'm overqualified
I think. Therefore I am DANGEROUS.
I think................I am paid.
I thought DEL *.* -really- deleted the files
I thought I made a mistake once, but I was wrong...
I thought I was mistaken but I was mistaken.
I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken.
I thought that you thought... must be mistaken.
I thought you were dead...
I told her, "Like (*&^%$# you are!"
I took thee for thy better.  Take thy fortune.
I touch the future. I teach. Christa McAuliffe
I tried OS/2 once, but I didn't inhale.
I tried an internal modem, but it hurt when I walk.
I tried an internal modem, but it hurt when I walked.
I tried switching to gum but I couldn't keep it lit!
I tried switching to gum but couldn't keep it lit.
I tried the rest but bought the best!!!!
I tried to drown my problems but they can swim.
I tried to love my neighbor as myself, but everytime I tried to grab it she smacked my hand.
I tried to play my shoehorn, but all I got were footnotes.
I tried to stop smoking cigarettes by telling myself I just didn't want to smoke, but I didn't believe myself. Barbara Kelly
I try to make everyone's day a little more surreal.
I twaught I twall a pussy cat, I did!  I did!
I understand the inventor of the bagpipes was inspired when he saw a man carrying an indignant, asthmatic pig under his arm. Unfortunately, the manmade sound never equalled the purity of the sound achieved by the pig. Alfred Hitchcock
I use Windows... on my car, on my house, on my...
I use Windows...on my car, on my house, on my...
I use windows...on my car, on my house, but not on my...
I used to be a bartender at the Betty Ford Clinic. Stephen Wright
I used to be an airline pilot. I got fired because I kept locking the keys in the plane. They caught me on an 80 foot stepladder with a coathanger. Stephen Wright
I used to be apathetic, but now I just don't care.
I used to be disgusted, but now I'm just amused.
I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure.
I used to be indecisive.  Now I'm not sure.
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
I used to be lost in the shuffle. Now I just shuffle along with the lost.
I used to be schizophrenic, but we're alright now.
I used to get high on life but lately I've built up a resistance.
I used to have a Tandy, but I got better!
I used to have a handle on life, then DOS closed it...
I used to have a handle on life, then it broke.
I used to have a life, then I got an HST !
I used to have a life. Now I have Windows NT.
I used to have a life. Now I have windows 3.0 !
I used to own an ant farm but had to give it up. I couldn't find tractors small enough to fit it. Stephen Wright
I used to read books.  Now I read .qwk files.
I used to spell badlie, but now I got worser.
I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
I used to watch TV, then I bought a modem.
I used to work at a factory where they made hydrants; but you couldn't park anywhere near the place. Stephen Wright
I usually get my stuff from people who promised somebody else that they would keep it a secret. Walter Winchell
I usually make up my mind about a man in ten seconds, and I very rarely change it. Margaret Thatcher
I venture to say no war can be long carried on against the will of the people. Edmund Burke
I voted for Change! And that's all I've got left.
I wake near the end of the day.
I walk along a thin line darling, dark shadows follow me.| Elvis
I walk slowly, but I never walk backward. Abraham Lincoln
I wanna see 'em explode in every zip code!
I want .50 cal machine guns as a factory option.
I want a meal, not a snack.
I want a warm bed and a kind word - and unlimited power.
I want everything; do you have it??
I want it all or nothing. Or maybe some.
I want the world to know I'm happy as can be.
I want to be Robin to Bush's Batman. | Senator Dan Quayle
I want to be a veterinarian because I love children.
I want to get a tatoo of myself on my entire body, only 2' taller. Stephen Wright
I want to have Michelle Pfeiffer's baby
I want to have children and I know my time is running out: I want to have them while my parents are still young enough to take care of them. Rita Rudner
I want to live forever or die in the attempt.
I want to make this place so unpleasant that they won't even think about doing something that could bring them back. Joe Arpaio, sheriff for Maricopa County, AZ, describing conditions in his 'tent city in the desert' jail, 1995
I want to see you shoot the way you shout. Theodore Roosevelt
I wanted a manly mail reader... I got a silly one <sigh>
I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. G Radner
I wanted to remind stockbrokers what real stock is. Joe Fafard, sculpture, whose work 'The Pasture' features cast bronze cows in Toronto's financial district, 1996
I warn you not to underestimate my powers.
I was Rush Limbaugh in a previous life.
I was a veteran, before I was a teengager. Michael Jackson, singer, songwriter, and megastar, 1993
I was a war baby; one look at me and my parents fought!
I was an only child......eventually.
I was arrested for walking in someone else's sleep.
I was born an American; I live an American; I shall die an American. Daniel Webster
I was born by Caesarean section, but you really can't tell...except that when I leave my house, I always go out the window... Stephen Wright
I was born smiling.
I was going 70 miles an hour and got stopped by a cop who said, 'Do you know the speed limit is 55 miles per hour?' 'Yes, officer, but I wasn't going to be out that long...' Stephen Wright
I was going to procrastinate, but I put it off.
I was going to procrastinate, but I put it off....
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did.  I said I didn't know. | Mark Twain
I was in a job interview and I opened a book and started reading. Then I said to the guy, 'Let me ask you a question. If you are in a spaceship that is traveling at the speed of light, and you turn on the headlights, does anything happen?' He said, I don't know. I said, I don't want your job. S Wright
I was just stopped by the LAPD and boy am I beat
I was known as the chief grave robber of my state. | Vice President Dan Quayle
I was on a roll, till I slipped on the butter.
I was part of that strange race of people aptly described as spending their lives doing things they detest to make money they don't want to buy things they don't need to impress people they dislike. Emile Henry Gauvreau
I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything. Stephen Wright
I was really too honest a man to be a politician and live. Socrates
I was sane once... didn't like it.
I was the next door kid's imaginary friend.
I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganizing; and a wonderful method it can be for creating the illusion of progress while producing confusion, inefficiency, and demoralization. Petronius Arbiter
I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering. Stephen Wright
I washed my edible underwear and now they're gone.
I wasn't always like this, Lieutenant. | Picard
I wasn't born in a log cabin, but my family moved into one as soon as they could afford it. Melville D. Landon
I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn't have to go so fast. Stephen Wright
I watched too much Wile E. Coyote as a kid. I've outgrown it. Jon Bon Jovi, musician and actor, on why he does not want to play action/adventure roles, 1996
I weigh the man, not his title; 'tis not the king's stamp can make the metal better. William Wycherley
I went camping and borrowed a circus tent by mistake. I didn't notice until I got it set up. People complained because they couldn't see the lake. Stephen Wright
I went down the street to the 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, 'Hey, the sign says you're open 24 hours.' He said, 'Yes, but not in a row.' Stephen Wright
I went from Pheonix Arizona, all the way to Tacoma, Philedelphia, Atlanta, L.A.| Steve Miller
I went into this bar and sat down next to a pretty girl. She looked at me and said, 'Hey, you have two different colored socks on.' I said, 'Yeah, I know, but to me they're the same because I go by thickness.' Stephen Wright
I went mad once. Did me a world of good.
I went on a 30-day diet - and lost 30 days!
I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. Joe E. Lewis
I went to a 7-11 and asked for a 2x4 and a box of 3x5's. The clerk said, 'ten-four.' Stephen Wright
I went to a general store, but they wouldn't let me buy anything specific. Stephen Wright
I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. Stephen Wright
I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said, 'What for?' I said, 'I'm going to buy some sugar.' Stephen Wright
I went to the eye doctor and found out I needed glasses for reading. So, I got some flip-up contact lenses. Stephen Wright
I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. So I had to buy them again. Stephen Wright
I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums. Stephen Wright
I went to this restaurant last night that was set up like a big buffet in the shape of an Ouija board. You'd think about what kind of food you want, and the table would move across the floor to it. Stephen Wright
I will be brief. Not nearly so brief as Salvador Dali, who gave the world's shortest speech. He said 'I will be so brief I have already finished,' and he sat down. Edward O. Wilson, biologist, at Penn State University Graduation, 1995
I will defend to your death my right to my opinion.
I will feel equality has arrived when we can elect to office women who are as incompetent as some of the men who are already there. Maureen Reagan
I will fight for your right to your wrong opinion.
I will make you shorter by the head.
I will never lie to you.
I will not forget you.
I will study and get ready, and perhaps my chance will come. Abraham Lincoln
I will try to follow the advice that a university president once gave a prospective commencement speaker. 'Think of yourself as the body at an Irish wake' he said. 'They need you in order to have the party, but no one expects you to say very much.' Anthony Lake, national security advisor, U Mass
I wise man cares not what other poeple think of himself.
I wish I could remember where I parked my hard disk....
I wish I could stand on a busy street corner, hat in hand, and beg people to throw me all their wasted hours. Bernard Berenson
I wish I could step on this program's bug.
I wish I had a snappy Trek Tagline to put here...
I wish I was a Klingon.  I want a lumpy head.
I wish life had a scroll-back buffer.
I wish life had a scroll-back buffer...
I wish life had a scroll-back buffer.....
I wish life had an editable scroll-back buffer ...
I wish my M-5 had 4DOS...
I wish my deadly foe no worse, Than want of friends, and empty purse. Nicholas Breton
I wish scripts would do what I think I tell them.
I wish that every human life might be pure transparent freedom. Simone de Beauvoir
I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence.  There's a knob called "brightness", but it doesn't work. | Gallagher
I wish there was something interesting to read down here.
I wish they all could be California girls.
I wish to preach not the doctrine of ignoble ease, but the doctrine of strenuous life. Theodore Roosevelt
I wish you humans would leave me alone.
I wish you were a beer.
I woke up to discover it had all been a terrible film...
I won't take my religion from any man who never works except with his mouth and never cherishes any memory except the face of the woman on the American silver dollar. Carl Sandburg
I won't use Windows, I won't use Windows, I won't...
I won't use Windows, I won't use Windows, I won't....
I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, 'If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?' Stephen Wright
I worked myself up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty., Groucho Marx
I worship the ground that awaits you.
I would advise you to keep your overhead down; avoid a major drug habit; play every day; and take it in front of other people. They need to hear it, and you need them to hear it. James Taylor, singer and songwriter, Berklee College of Music Graduation, 1995
I would ask that you stop fiddling with my ears. | Data
I would be married, but I'd have no wife, I would be married to a single life. Richard Crashaw
I would dance for joy if there weren't people watching.
I would give all the wealth of the world, and all the deeds of all the heroes, for one true vision. Henry David Thoreau
I would give no thought of what the world might say of me, if I could only transmit to posterity the reputation of an honest man. Sam Houston
I would have suffered a lot more if understood.
I would jog, but the ice would fall out of my glass.
I would like to buy a fish liscence, please.
I would like to express my sympathy to all those impacted by this disaster. | Vice President Dan Quayle (re: crushed quake victims)
I would like to live in Manchester, England. The transition between Manchester and death would be unnoticeable. Mark Twain
I would live to study, and not study to live. Francis Bacon
I would not attack the faith of a heathen without being sure I had a better one to put in its place. Harriet Beecher Stowe
I would not become a member of a club or organization, that would have me as one of its members| Groucho Marx
I would prefer something a little more reliable than hope.
I would rather be a one-term President and do what I believe is right than to be a two-term President at the cost of seeing America become a second-rate power and to see this Nation accept the first defeat in its proud 190-year history. Richard M. Nixon
I would rather be able to appreciate things I cannot have than to have things I am not able to appreciate. Elbert Hubbard
I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than those attending too small a degree of it. Thomas Jefferson
I would rather belong to a poor nation that was free than to a rich nation that had ceased to be in love with liberty. Woodrow Wilson
I would rather fight with my hands than my tongue. Dolley Madison
I would rather lose in a cause that I know some day will triumph than to triumph in a cause that I know some day will fail. Wendell L. Willkie
I would rather lose in a cause that will some day win, than win in a cause that will some day lose! Woodrow Wilson
I would rather see the United States respected than loved by other nations. Henry Cabot Lodge
I would rather sit on a pumpkin, and have it all to myself, than be crowded on a velvet cushion. Henry David Thoreau
I would rather start a family than finish one. Don Marquis
I would remind you that extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice. And let me also remind you that moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue. Barry M. Goldwater
I would say more, but I'm limited to 45 chara
I would sooner be notorious than unknown.
I would sooner read a timetable or a catalog than nothing at all. W. Somerset Maugham
I would strongly oppose apathy, if I cared...
I would warn you that I do not attribute to nature either beauty or deformity, order or confusion. Only in relation to our imagination can things be called beautiful or ugly, well-ordered or confused. Benedict Spinoza
I wouldn't mind being poor if I had lots of money.
I wouldn't recommend sex, drugs or insanity for everyone, but they've always worked for me.| Hunter S. Thompson
I wouldn't say I invented tacky, but I definitely brought it to its present high popularity. Bette Midler
I wouldn't shoot him if I were you.  It will just make him mad.
I wouldn't touch the Metric System with a 3.048m pole
I wouldn't touch the Metric System with a 3.048m pole!
I wouldn't want to belong to any club that would have me as a member.
I wrote a few children's books...not on purpose. Stephen Wright
I wrote a song, but I can't read music so I don't know what it is. Every once in a while I'll be listening to the radio and I say, 'I think I might have written that.' Stephen Wright
I wrote my own benchmark, my machine is now 500MHz
I! finally! learned! how! to! punctuate! Kirk! sentences!
I'd always wondered about that.
I'd be a narcissist, but I'm WAY too ugly.
I'd change the world for the better if only I had the source code.
I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.
I'd give my left arm to be ambidextrous.
I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
I'd have written sooner but I thought I owed you money.
I'd just as soon kiss a Wookiee.
I'd kill Flipper for a good tuna sandwich right now.
I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
I'd like to live like a poor person with lots of money.
I'd like to, but last time I went I never came back..
I'd look good on you.|Pick up line
I'd love to but, I changed the lock on my door and now I can't get out.
I'd love to, but I changed the lock on my door and now I can't get out.
I'd love to, but I did my own thing and now I've got to undo it.
I'd love to, but I don't want to leave my comfort zone.
I'd love to, but I feel a song coming on.
I'd love to, but I have some real hard words to look up in the dictionary.
I'd love to, but I have to answer all of my "occupant" letters.
I'd love to, but I have to be on the next train to Bermuda.
I'd love to, but I have to bleach my hare.
I'd love to, but I have to check the freshness dates on my dairy products.
I'd love to, but I have to draw "Cubby" for an art scholarship.
I'd love to, but I have to floss my cat.
I'd love to, but I have to fluff my shower cap.
I'd love to, but I have to fulfill my potential.
I'd love to, but I have to go to court for kitty littering.
I'd love to, but I have to go to the post office to see if I'm still wanted.
I'd love to, but I have to jog my memory.
I'd love to, but I have to knit some dust bunnies for a charity bazaar.
I'd love to, but I have to rotate my crops.
I'd love to, but I have to sit up with a sick ant.
I'd love to, but I have to stay home and see if I snore
I'd love to, but I have to stay home and see if I snore.
I'd love to, but I have to study for a blood test.
I'd love to, but I have to thaw some karate chops for dinner.
I'd love to, but I have to wash/condition/perm/curl/tease/torment my hair.
I'd love to, but I have too much guilt.
I'd love to, but I left my body in my other clothes.
I'd love to, but I made an appointment with a cuticle specialist.
I'd love to, but I never go out on days that end in "Y".
I'd love to, but I prefer to remain an enigma.
I'd love to, but I promised to help a friend fold road maps.
I'd love to, but I think you want the OTHER Luke.
I'd love to, but I want to spend more time with my blender.
I'd love to, but I'll be looking for a parking space.
I'd love to, but I'm attending a perfume convention as guest sniffer.
I'd love to, but I'm attending the opening of my garage door.
I'd love to, but I'm being deported.
I'd love to, but I'm building a pig from a kit.
I'd love to, but I'm converting my calendar watch from Julian to Gregorian.
I'd love to, but I'm doing door-to-door collecting for static cling.
I'd love to, but I'm enrolled in aerobic scream therapy.
I'd love to, but I'm getting my overalls overhauled.
I'd love to, but I'm giving nuisance lessons at a convenience store.
I'd love to, but I'm going down to the bakery to watch the buns rise.
I'd love to, but I'm going through cherry cheesecake withdrawal.
I'd love to, but I'm going to be old someday.
I'd love to, but I'm going to count the bristles in my toothbrush.
I'd love to, but I'm having all my plants neutered.
I'd love to, but I'm having my baby shoes bronzed.
I'd love to, but I'm in training to be a household pest.
I'd love to, but I'm observing National Apathy Week.
I'd love to, but I'm planning to go downtown to try on gloves.
I'd love to, but I'm sandblasting my oven.
I'd love to, but I'm staying home to work on my cottage cheese sculpture.
I'd love to, but I'm taking punk totem pole carving.
I'd love to, but I'm teaching my ferret to yodel.
I'd love to, but I'm too young for that stuff.
I'd love to, but I'm touring China with a wok band.
I'd love to, but I'm trying to be less popular.
I'd love to, but I'm trying to cut down.
I'd love to, but I'm trying to see how long I can go without saying yes.
I'd love to, but I'm uncomfortable when I'm alone or with others.
I'd love to, but I'm up to my elbows in waxy buildup.
I'd love to, but I'm waiting to see if I'm already a winner.
I'd love to, but I'm worried about my vertical hold.
I'd love to, but I'm writing a love letter to Richard Simmons.
I'd love to, but I've been scheduled for a karma transplant.
I'd love to, but I've been traded to Cincinnati.
I'd love to, but I've dedicated my life to linguini.
I'd love to, but I've got a Friends of Rutabaga meeting.
I'd love to, but It wouldn't be fair to the other Beautiful People.
I'd love to, but It's my parakeet's bowling night.
I'd love to, but having fun gives me prickly heat.
I'd love to, but it's too close to the turn of the century.
I'd love to, but my Dress For Obscurity class meets then.
I'd love to, but my Millard Fillmore Fan Club meets then.
I'd love to, but my bathroom tiles need grouting.
I'd love to, but my chocolate-appreciation class meets that night.
I'd love to, but my crayons all melted together.
I'd love to, but my favorite commercial is on TV.
I'd love to, but my mother would never let me hear the end of it.
I'd love to, but my palm reader advised against it.
I'd love to, but my patent is pending.
I'd love to, but my plot to take over the world is thickening.
I'd love to, but my subconscious says no.
I'd love to, but my uncle escaped again.
I'd love to, but my yucca plant is feeling yucky.
I'd love to, but none of my socks match.
I'd love to, but people are blaming me for the Spanish-American War.
I'd love to, but the President said he might drop in.
I'd love to, but the grunion are running.
I'd love to, but the last time I went, I never came back.
I'd love to, but the man on television told me to stay tuned.
I'd love to, but there are important world issues that need worrying about.
I'd love to, but there's a disturbance in the Force.
I'd love to, but you know how we psychos are.
I'd offer everyone a Twinkie, but I'm not hostes
I'd rather be pissed off than pissed on.
I'd rather be rich than good-looking.
I'd rather be rich!
I'd rather have a 3.5" hard one than a 5.25" floppy one
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.
I'd rather have a free bottle in front of me than a prefrontal lobotomy.
I'd rather keep my promises to other politicians than to God. God, at least, has a degree of forgiveness. Anonymous Politician
I'd rather lose my memory than my..ummm...ahhh...never mind.
I'd rather marry a duck-billed platypus...
I'd rather wear out than rust out.
I'd really like to lay one across your teeth. | Beverly
I'd tell you more more, but you might blush.
I'll Have What The Fellow On The Floor Is Having
I'll backup my Hard Drive tomor*(&^)*98&^^...
I'll be back.
I'll be back. Maybe...
I'll be back....| The Terminator
I'll burn my books.
I'll buy that for a dollar
I'll deal with today tommorrow.
I'll deal with today tomorrow.
I'll eat anything that's BRIGHT BLUE!!
I'll fight! They're out there! They can hear us! Eyiyiyiyiyiyiyiyyiyyiyiyiyiyiyiyi!
I'll get to it on the 2nd Tuesday of next week.
I'll get you my pretty,  and your little dog too!
I'll get you, my pretty ... and your little dog too!
I'll grant the random access to my heart, Thoul't tell me all the constants of thy love; And so we two shall all love's lemmas prove And in our bound partition never part. | Stanislaw Lem, "Cyberiad"
I'll have another bowl of cereal, please.| Jane
I'll have one brain on drugs with bacon, toast and juice.
I'll have what the guy in the casket had.
I'll have what the guy on the floor is having.
I'll have what the guy on the floor is having...
I'll jump off that bridge when I come to it.
I'll just nip out and shoot myself.
I'll make you famous....
I'll never forget the....uhh...the...never mind!
I'll never forget what's-his-name.
I'll never get off this planet.
I'll not listen to reason. Reason always means what someone else has got to say. Elizabeth Gaskell
I'll panic if I bloody well want to
I'll see you in hell before I'd do that.
I'll tell ya, life aint easy for a boy named Sue
I'll tell ya, life aint easy for a boy named Sue!
I'll trust you to make sure that doesn't happen. Dan Rather-journalist, to the pilot of a deep sea submersible, upon finding out what would happen if the craft sprung a leak while submerged, 1996
I'll turn over a new leaf.
I'm "flower units" about you, too.
I'm Bugs Bunny of Borg.  What's up Collective?
I'm Buster Brown and I live in a shoe!
I'm C-sick !!!
I'm FLYING ! I'm FLYING ! >>THUD<<
I'm Jewish, and Shabtai Zvi will return!
I'm NOT 30..I am 18 with 12 years experience!
I'm NOT addicted. I just use the modem all the time.
I'm Not Schizophrenic, And Neither Am I.
I'm SO confused...
I'm a Bum...a BEACH Bum!
I'm a Hollywood writer, so I put on my sports jacket and take off my brain. Ben Hecht
I'm a Hollywood writer; so I put on a sports jacket and take off my brain.
I'm a Lumberjack and I'm OK
I'm a Lumberjack and I'm OK!
I'm a analog man in a digital world.
I'm a brain in a vat. Are you one too?
I'm a consultant because I'd rather be self-unemployed.
I'm a creationist; I refuse to believe that I could have evolved from man.
I'm a figment of your imagination.
I'm a fragment of your imagination
I'm a hero with coward's legs.
I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK.
I'm a natural blonde, so please speak slowly.
I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I'm perfect.
I'm a paranoid schizophrenic always out to get myself...
I'm a pea - I can feel a princess through 50 matresses.
I'm a power-crazed psycopath - I don't WANT inner peace
I'm a virgin, but I'm just not very good at it.
I'm a workaholic who resisted a rest.
I'm all for computer dating, but I wouldn't want one to marry my sister.
I'm all tagged out!
I'm amazed, that it works at all.
I'm an absolute, off-the-wall fanatical moderate.
I'm an apathetic sociopath - I'd kill you if I cared.
I'm an incorrigible punster, so don't corrige me!
I'm an influential person, gravitationally speaking.
I'm as bored as a pacifist's pistol.
I'm as confused as a baby at a topless bar
I'm as confused as a baby in a topless bar.
I'm as innocent as a new-laid egg.
I'm at the corner of Walk and Don't Walk.
I'm becoming addicted to happiness.
I'm bloody sick of standing here every day. | O'Brien
I'm cutting boy, but you aint bleeding| Foghorn Leghorn
I'm dangerous when I know what I'm doing.
I'm dappled and drowsy and ready to sleep.
I'm defending her honor, which is more than she ever did.
I'm definitely positively maybe decisive.
I'm disappointed, but I'm not going to run around like Dennis Rodman and head-butt somebody. Greg Norman, Australian professional golfer, after losing the Masters tournament, 1996
I'm donating my body to science fiction!
I'm easy to please as long as I get my way.
I'm extraordinarily patient provided I get my own way in the end. Margaret Thatcher
I'm fascinated by the way memory diffuses fact.
I'm fed up to the ears with old men dreaming up wars for young men to die in. | George McGovern
I'm feeling just great.
I'm firm. You're obstinate. He's a pigheaded fool.
I'm flexible... just don't change anything.
I'm from the Government... I'm here to help you!
I'm glad that ignorance is such bliss.
I'm going through some serious basketball withdrawl here. (Anonymous Basketball Fan), on a WVLK radio call-in show, less three weeks after the University of Kentucky won the US college basketball championship, 1996
I'm going to k-k-k-k-k-k-kill you K-k-k-k-k-k-ken
I'm going to make a prediction - it could go either way.
I'm going to the Missing Persons Bureau to see if anyone is looking for me.
I'm gonna plead insanity, what about you ?
I'm gonna plead insanity, what about you?
I'm growing older but not up . -Jimmy Buffett
I'm having an out-of-money experience.
I'm hopelessly addicted to my PC and modem!
I'm in Pittsburgh.  Why am I here? | Harold Urey, Nobel Laureate
I'm in a phone booth at the corner of Walk and Don't Walk.
I'm in charge here. | Al Haig
I'm in here for being crazy, not stupid.
I'm in love with Susy...
I'm in search of myself.  Have you seen me anywhere?
I'm in shape ... Rounds a shape isn't it?
I'm in shape ... decapolyhedron that is.
I'm in shape ... pear is a shape isn't it?
I'm in shape ... round's a shape isn't it?
I'm in shape... round is a shape, isn't it ?
I'm in total control, but don't tell my wife.
I'm incredibly jealous, but still glad for you.
I'm just a peripheral visionary.
I'm just about finished, just a coulple more seconds...
I'm just here for moral support. Ignore the gun.
I'm just here for moral support...ignore the gun.
I'm just looking at your nametag, honest!
I'm just trying out this tagline. It's not registered yet.
I'm kinda tired. I was up all night trying to round off infinity. Then I got bored and went out and painted passing lines on curved roads. Stephen Wright
I'm leaving my body to science fiction.
I'm like John Wayne. I only play good guys. Oliver North, retired US marine colonel, describing his cameo role on a TV series, 1995
I'm like a bad TSR; I keep popping up!
I'm losin' it | Geordi
I'm lost!  Can you help?....
I'm lost, but I'm still making pretty good time
I'm mad as hell, and I'm not going to take it anymore
I'm mad as hell, and I'm not going to take it anymore!
I'm mad at you because you were someone else.
I'm making a career of evil.
I'm making a home movie called "The Thing That Grew in My Refrigerator".
I'm mooning you now, you just can't see me.
I'm more humble than you are
I'm more humble than you are.
I'm moving to Mars next week, so if you have any boxes.
I'm moving to Mars next week, so if you have any boxes... Stephen Wright
I'm much too young to feel this damned old
I'm multitasking... I'm reading in the bathroom.
I'm neither for, nor against apathy
I'm neither for, nor against apathy.
I'm nervous and my socks are too loose.
I'm new and whats all this then?
I'm no stranger, just a friend you haven't met...
I'm not a Vulcan, but I play one on TV  Leonard Nimoy
I'm not a complete idiot - several parts are missing.
I'm not a complete idiot..several parts are missing.
I'm not a computer nerd : merely a techno-weenie.
I'm not a crook; I'm "ethically challenged."
I'm not a minority. I'm an outnumbered majority
I'm not a natural leader. I'm too intellectual; I'm too abstract; I think too much. Newt Gingrich, US Congressman and House Speaker, 1995
I'm not a real sysop, I just play one on TV.
I'm not a supreme being.  Picard
I'm not a witch doctor-- I'm only a folk medic.
I'm not an actor, but I play one on TV.
I'm not arrogant, I'm RIGHT
I'm not arrogant, I'm RIGHT.
I'm not as dumb as you look.
I'm not as think as you stoned I am.
I'm not as thunk as you drink I am.
I'm not asking you to LIVE in sin, only to visit awhile..
I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way.
I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way.         J.Rabbit
I'm not broke, I'm just badly bent.
I'm not conceited, I just can't stand mortals.
I'm not confused, I'm just well-mixed.
I'm not crazy, I'm chlorinated
I'm not cynical. Just experienced.
I'm not dead yet I think I'll go for a walk.
I'm not dead, I'm metabolically challenged.
I'm not dead. I'm electroencephelographically challenged.
I'm not dead; I'm "metabolically challenged."
I'm not easily offended--please try harder.
I'm not even going to ignore that.
I'm not fat just horizontially disproportionate.
I'm not going deaf. I'm ignoring you.
I'm not interested in age. People who tell me their age are silly. You're as old as you feel.
I'm not just one of your snuggle-girls, Will. | Beverly
I'm not loafing. I work so fast I'm always finished
I'm not lost  I'm "locationally challenged."
I'm not lost, I'm "locationally challenged."
I'm not lost, but I don't know where I am.
I'm not lost... I'm "locationally challenged".
I'm not nearly as think as you confused I am.
I'm not old. I'm chronologically gifted.
I'm not on drugs.  I am drugs.
I'm not opinionated, I'm just always right
I'm not paranoid ! Which of my enemies told you this ?
I'm not paranoid Which of my enemies told you that?
I'm not prejudiced. I hate everyone equally.
I'm not real smart, but I can lift heavy things.
I'm not rude, I'm "attitudinally challenged".
I'm not schizophrenic, I'm "multi-faceted".
I'm not schizophrenic.  It's this guy beside me
I'm not short and heavy, I'm just traveling near the speed of light.
I'm not short; I'm "vertically challenged."
I'm not sloppy, I'm organizationally challenged.
I'm not so think as you drunk I am!
I'm not super man. But I am very dense.
I'm not telling where my spots end! * Dax
I'm not tense, just terribly A*L*E*R*T.
I'm not ugly, just aesthetically challenged.
I'm not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am. It's jus the drunker I sit here the longa I get
I'm not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am. It's just the drunker I sit here the longer I get.
I'm not wearing any underwear. Film at 11.
I'm on the corner of Walk and Don't Walk
I'm on the crest of a slump.
I'm only here for the salad bar.
I'm only paranoid because everyone's against me.
I'm out of bed and dressed.  What more do you want?
I'm out of bed and dressed. What more do you want?
I'm outstanding in my field (left field) knee deep in BS
I'm pink, therefore I'm spam.
I'm positively enameled with this subject.
I'm practicing assertiveness.  Do you think that's okay?
I'm practicing assertiveness. Do you think that's okay?
I'm prepared for all emergencies but totally unprepared for everyday life.
I'm proud that I'm a politician. A politician is a man who understands government, and it takes a politician to run a government. A statesman is a politician who's been dead 10 or 15 years. Harry S. Truman
I'm proud to have been a part of your moral decline.
I'm proud to pay taxes in the United States; the only thing is, I could be just as proud for half the money. Arthur Godfrey
I'm really bouncing with joy today.
I'm really enjoying my stay on earth.
I'm really enjoying not talking to you ... Let's not talk again REAL soon ...
I'm really enjoying not talking to you, so let's not talk again real soon, okay?
I'm really sorry about always saying I'm really sorry.
I'm responsible for the MOTHER of all screw-ups!
I'm saving my money for when they get Phaser Printers
I'm schizophrenic and so am I.
I'm schizophrenic, What are you?
I'm sensing large dripping globs of chocolate. * Troi
I'm so bored, I'm starting to miss my husband.
I'm so broke I can't even pay attention
I'm so broke, I can't even pay attention.
I'm so close to hell I can almost see Vegas!
I'm so full of joie de vivre.
I'm so poor, I can't even pay attention!
I'm solidly behind whichever side eventually wins.
I'm sorry Dave, but I'm afraid I can't do that.| HAL 9000
I'm sorry, Dave. I can't do that. I'm all out of Taglines
I'm sorry, this tagline is not an apology
I'm sorry. I'm afraid I've caught poetry.
I'm sorry. Yesterday was the deadline on all complaints.
I'm spending a year dead for Tax Purposes
I'm spending a year dead for tax purposes.
I'm sure it's clearly explained in the Zmodem DOC's
I'm sure it's in the manual somewhere...
I'm sure that if there were a death penalty more people would be alive today.| N. Reagan
I'm terribly sorry, but I'm afraid you're just a mirage.
I'm the Vice-President. They know it, and they know that I know it.| Vice President Dan Quayle
I'm the guy with one star, 2 G's, 2 Nodes and one Saviour
I'm the leader, which way did they go?
I'm the one your mother warned you about...
I'm the person your mother warned you about.
I'm the person your mother warned you about...
I'm tired of love, I'm still more tired of rhyme, but money gives me pleasure all the time. Hilaire Belloc
I'm tired of thinking up new taglines
I'm too old and incontinent-oops-incompetent
I'm too skeptical to deny the possibility of anything...
I'm trying to find myself. Has anyone seen me lately?
I'm trying to think, but nothing happens.| Curly
I'm turning you in to the SPCA!
I'm user friendly, I don't byte -- I nybble.
I'm usually awake near the end of the day.
I'm waiting for Windows v4.0 !
I'm warning you One step closer and I'll drop carrier
I'm warning you! One step closer and I'll drop carrier!
I'm wobbling and I can't fall down! Weeble
I'm working on my 2nd $million...  Gave up on the 1st.
I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.
I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done. Stephen Wright
I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography. Stephen Wright
I'm youth, I'm joy, I'm a little bird that has broken out of the egg. James Matthew Barrie
I've always argued that it is just as desirable, just as possible, to have philosopher plumbers as philosopher kings. Edith Starett Green
I've always believed in writing without a collaborator, because where two people are writing the same book, each believes he gets all the worry and only half the royalties. Agatha Christie
I've always followed my father's advice: He told me, first, to always keep my word and, second, to never insult anybody unintentionally. If I insult you, you can be goddam sure I intend to. And, third, he told me not to go around looking for trouble. John Wayne
I've always wanted to make love to an alien.
I've been married to one Marxist and one Facist, and neither one would take the garbage out. Lee Grant
I've been rich and I've been poor. Rich is better. Sophie Tucker
I've been scheduled for a karma transplant.
I've been seduced by the chocolate side of the force.
I've been subjected - I think that's the word - to that music for years by my children. I.M. Pei, architect for the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, on Rock and Roll, 1995
I've been there.
I've boldly gone where no one has gone before.
I've come for an argument
I've come for an argument!
I've fallen and I can't get down, James Brown
I've fallen and I can't get up.
I've fallen, and I get get up!
I've fallen... and can't BOOT up!
I've fallen...but I'll be back...| Arnold Schwarzeneg
I've given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself.
I've got 256K of RAM, so why can't I run Windows 3.0?
I've got Parkinson's disease.  And he's got mine.
I've got a Mickey Mouse PC with a Goofy operating system.
I've got a devil in me.
I've got a mind like a... a... what's that thing called?
I've got a photgraphic memory, I just aint got any film in there
I've got a very bad feeling about this.
I've got morals. I just don't know where they are.
I've got to admit it's getting better.
I've got to sit down and work out where I stand.
I've had BETA days... and nights.
I've had a hard drive, think I'll crash.
I've had an exciting time; I married for love and got a little money along with it. Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy
I've had fun before.  This isn't it.
I've had quite a bit to drink, and you're beginning to look pretty good.|Pick up line
I've just broken all previous records on Space Invaders.
I've just had a pint of Owd Roger, so everything is rosy.
I've known countless people who were reservoirs of learning, yet never had a thought. Wilson Mizner
I've never been hurt by anything I didn't say.
I've never met a GUI I couldn't crash.
I've noticed that one thing about parents is that no matter what stage your child is in, the parents who have older children always tell you the next stage is worse. Dave Barry
I've only got twelve cards.
I've plummeted to my death and I can't get up!
I've run less risk driving my way across country than eating my way across it. Duncan Hines
I've said many a time that I think the Un-American Activities Committee in the House of Representatives was the most un-American thing in America! Harry S. Truman
I've seen you before. Milk carton?
I've told you a million times to quit exaggerating.
I've upped my standards, SO UP YOURS!
I've upped my standards. Now, up yours.
I've used Basic so long, my brain has gonesub permanently
I've used this particular tagline 346 times.
I've writing a book. I've got the page numbers done. Stephen Wright
I)gnore, R)eboot, or C)all Laura Palmer
I, for one, hope that youth will again revolt and again demoralize the dead weight of conformity that now lies upon us. Howard Mumford Jones
I/O I/O so off to work I go!
IBM - Making Tomorrow's Mistakes Today.
IBM - Yesterday's technology today!
IBM : Ice Box Machines.
IBM : Incredibly Boring Manuals.
IBM : Inertia Breeds Mediocrity.
IBM : Inferior But Marketable.
IBM : Making Tomorrow's Mistakes Today.
IBM : Yesterday's Hardware Today.
IBM = Ice Box Machines
IBM = Inertia Breeds Mediocrity
IBM = Inferior But Marketable
IBM ? [I]ncredibly [B]oring [M]anuals.
IBM had a PL/I, Its syntax worse than JOSS; And everywhere this language went, It was a total loss.
IBM stands for Inferior But Marketable.
IBM: I've Been Misled
IBM: Inertia Breeds Mediocrity
IBM: Inevitably Bad Marketing
IBM: It may be slow, but at least it's expensive.
IBM: When you care enough to spend the very most
IBM: When you care enough to spend the very most.
IBM: you can buy better, but you can't pay more
IBM?  [I]ncredibly [B]oring [M]anuals.
IDIOT-n A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling. Ambrose Bierce
IF STONE(ROTATION) > 1 THEN MOSS(PROPAGATION) = 0
IF code_works THEN don't_fix_it END IF
IF numcooks > .maxcooks THEN;SET V broth = 'spoiled';END
IF(!CRASH()) _THANK_GOD();
ILLITERATE ? Write for a free brochure.
IMBESI'S LAW OF THE CONSERVATION OF FILTH: In order for something to become clean, something else must become dirty.
IMHO : In My Honest Opinion.
INE Do Not Cross! - TAGLINE Do Not Cross! - TAGL
INFLATION is when the BUCK does'nt stop ANYWHERE.
INTERLACE: To tie two boots together.
IOT trap -- core dumped
IRON LAW OF DISTRIBUTION: Them that has, gets.
IT WON'T WORK !!!
Ideal Man is born a predestined idealist, for he is born to act. To act is to affirm the worth of an end, and to persist in affirming the worth of an end is to make an ideal. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Idealism increases in proportion to the distance from the problem.
Ideals are like the stars: we never reach them, but like the mariners of the sea, we chart our course by them. Carl Schurz
Ideals are the 'incentive payment' of practical men. The opportunity to strive for them is the currency that has enriched America through the centuries. Robert E. Hannegan
Ideas are the factors that lift civilization. They create revolutions. There is more dynamite in an idea than in many bombs. John H. Vincent
Ideas are the root of creation. Ernest Dimnet
Ideas don't stay in some minds very long because they don't like solitary confinement.
Identify your visitor.
Idiot Box, n.: The part of the envelope that tells a person where to place the stamp when they can't quite figure it out for themselves. | Rich Hall, "Sniglets"
Idiot, n.: A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Idiot: A member of a large and powerful tribe from which humans developed.
Idleness The way to be nothing is to do nothing. Nathaniel Howe
Idleness is an inlet to disorder, and makes way for licentiousness. People who have nothing to do are quickly tired of their own company. Jeremy Collier
Idleness is leisure gone to seed.
Idleness is the holiday of fools.
Idleness is the stupidity of the body, and stupidity is the idleness of the mind. Johann G. Seume
Idolatry The idol is the measure of the worshipper. James Russell Lowell
Idolatry is in a man's own thought, not in the opinion of another. John Selden
If  1st you dont succeed:Rewrite it from scratch
If "R" is Reverse, how come "D" is FORWARD?
If (Dog_bark = true) then letter:=arrived;
If 1st you dont succeed, rewrite it from scratch
If A = B and B = C, then A = C, except where void or prohibited by law. | Roy Santoro
If A equal success, then the formula is A equals X plus Y and Z, with X being work, Y play, and Z keeping your mouth shut. Albert Einstein
If A equals success, then the formula is A equals X plus Y plus Z. X is work. Y is play. Z is keep your mouth shut. Recalled on his death 18 Apr 55 Albert Einstein
If At First You Don't Succeed Ignore The Docs...
If Clinton is the answer, the question must be stupid.
If Corn Oil Is Made From Corn, What's Baby Oil Made From?
If Data is "fully functional," can he get a woman pregnant?
If ET married Peter Cetera he'd be ET CETERA.
If Einstein Had Been Black It would be E=MC Hammer.
If Glass=Empty .AND. Thirsty Then OpenTuborg
If God did not exist it would be necessary to invent Him. Voltaire
If God had intended Man to Smoke, He would have set him on Fire.
If God had intended Man to Walk, He would have given him Feet.
If God had intended Man to Watch TV, He would have given him Rabbit Ears.
If God had intended Men to Smoke, He would have put Chimneys in their Heads.
If God had meant for us to be in the Army, we would have been born with green, baggy skin.
If God had meant for us to be naked, we would have been born that way.
If God had meant us to eat meringue, he would have made chickens fart more.
If God had not given us sticky tape, it would have been necessary to invent it.
If God had wanted you to go around nude, He would have given you bigger hands.
If God has created us in His image, we have more than returned the compliment. Voltaire
If God is perfect, why did He create discontinuous functions?
If I am not for myself, who will be for me? And if I am only for myself, what am I? And if not nowwhen? Hillel
If I became a philosopher, if I have so keenly sought this fame for which I'm still waiting, it's all been to seduce women basically. Jean-Paul Satre
If I buy the steel wool, can you knit me a BMW?
If I buy the steel wool, can you knit me a Porsche?
If I can't fix it, it's probably dead.
If I can't have SessionManager, I don't want anything.
If I can, can you ?
If I cannot bend Heaven, I shall move Hell.
If I could think of one it'd be right HERE!
If I didn't start painting, I would have raised chickens. Grandma Moses
If I die, I forgive you, if I recover, we shall see.
If I follow you home will you keep me?
If I follow you home, will you keep me?
If I had a hammer, I'd use it on Peret, Paul, and Mary. Howard Rosenberg
If I had a plantation in Georgia and a home in Hell, I'd sell the plantation and go home. | Eugene P. Gallagher
If I had any humility I would be perfect.| Ted Turner
If I had anything witty to say, I wouldn't put it here.
If I had eight hours to chop down a tree, I'd spend six sharpening my ax. Abraham Lincoln
If I had my life to live over again, I'd make the same mistakes sooner.
If I had my way I'd make health catching instead of disease. Robert Green Ingersoll
If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide. Mahatma Gandhi
If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner. Tallulah Bankhead, actress
If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons. James Thurber
If I have done any deed worthy of remembrance, that deed will be my monument. If not, no monument can preserve my memory. Agesilaus II
If I have erred, I err in company with Abraham Lincoln. Theodore Roosevelt
If I have not read a book before, it is, for all intents and purposes, new to me whether it was printed yesterday or three hundred years ago. William Hazlitt
If I have not seen so far it is because I stood in giant's footsteps.
If I knew what I was talking about--would I be here???
If I only had a 486 . . .
If I only had a 486-33...
If I only had a 486...
If I only had one more teragigadactylbyte...
If I save the whales, where do I keep them?
If I save time, when do I get it back ?
If I save time, when do I get it back?
If I shot myself, my ex would sue me for the bullet
If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress. Will Rogers
If I throw a cat out the car window, is it kitty litter?
If I traveled to the end of the rainbow As Dame Fortune did intend, Murphy would be there to tell me The pot's at the other end. | Bert Whitney
If I want any shit outta you I'll squeeze your head.
If I want your opinion I'll beat it from you
If I want your opinion I'll beat it out of you
If I want your opinion, I'll ask you to fill out the necessary form.
If I want your stupid opinion, I'll beat it out of you.
If I wanted your opinion I'd ask your computer
If I wanted your opinion, I would have given it to you.
If I wanted your opinion, I'd ask your computer.
If I was Elvis, would you screw me?|Pick up line
If I were here more often, I wouldn't be gone so much.
If I were rich my butler would answer my mail.
If I were to prescribe one process in the training of men which is fundamental to success in any direction, it would be thoroughgoing training in the habit of accurate observation. It is a habit which every one of us should be seeking ever more to per Eugene G. Grace
If I were two faced, would I wear this one?
If I were you, who'd be me?
If I'd known how much packing I'd have to do, I'd have run again., on leaving the White House, from Time Magazine, 1/26/53 Harry S Truman
If I'm lying, I'm dying| David Addison
If I'm right 90% of the time, why quibble about the remaining 3%?
If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times, resist hyperbole.
If IBM has Bugs, does an Apple have Worms?
If J. Paul Getty opened a health resort, would it be a Spa-Getty?
If Jack's in love, he's no judge of Jill's beauty. Benjamin Franklin
If Jesus Christ were to come today, people would not even crucify him. They would ask him to dinner, and hear what he had to say, and make fun of it. | Thomas Carlyle
If Marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws !
If Murphy's Law can go wrong, it will.
If Noah had used Zip, he could have used a smaller boat.
If Q was female, would he be called O?
If Q were castrated would he become ... O ???
If Q were castrated, would he become O?
If R is Reverse, how come D is FORWARD ?
If Reagan is the answer, it must have been a very silly question.
If The Shoe Fits - The Sock Fits !
If Thomas Edison invented electric light today, Dan Rather would report it on CBS News as 'candle making industry threatened'. Newt Gingrich, US Congressman and House Speaker, 1995
If Windows sucked it would be good for something.
If a President doesn't do it to his wife, he'll do it to his country.
If a computer cable has one end, then it has another.
If a computer cable has one end, then it has another. Lyall's Conjecture
If a cow laughs hard, does milk come out of it's nose?
If a fly has no wings would you call him a walk?
If a group of N persons implements a COBOL compiler, there will be N-1 passes.  Someone in the group has to be the manager. | T. Cheatham
If a job's worth doing, it's worth taking the trouble to ask someone to do it.
If a law were passed giving six months to every writer of a first book, only the good ones would do it. Bertrand Russell
If a listener nods his head when you're explaining your program, wake him up.
If a little knowledge is dangerous, where is the man who has so much as to be out of danger? Thomas Huxley
If a man cannot be a Christian in the place where he is, he cannot be a Christian anywhere. Henry Ward Beecher
If a man could have half his wishes he could double his troubles. Benjamin Franklin
If a man could have half his wishes, he would double his troubles.
If a man does not keep pace with his companions perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music he hears however measured and far away. Henry David Thoreau
If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away. Henry David Thoreau
If a man does not make new acquaintances as he advances through life, he will soon find himself left alone; one should keep his friendships in constant repair. Samuel Johnson
If a man empties his purse into his head, no man can take it away from him. An investment in knledge always pays the best interest. Benjamin Franklin
If a man is called to be a streetsweeper, he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven played music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say, here lived a great streetsweeper who did his job well. King
If a man is destined to drown, he will drown even in a spoonful of water. Yiddish Proverb
If a man is in a minority of one, we lock him up. Oliver Wendell Holmes
If a man is right, he can't be too radical; if he is wrong, he can't be too conservative. Josh Billings
If a man owns land, the land owns him. Ralph Waldo Emerson
If a man should happen to reach perfection in this world, he would have to die immediately to enjoy himself. Josh Billings
If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. Erma Bombeck
If a man who cannot count finds a four-leaf clover, is he lucky? Stanislaw J. Lec
If a man would follow, today, the teachings of the Old Testament, he would be a criminal. If he would follow the teachings of the new, he would be insane. Robert Green Ingersoll
If a man writes a book, let him set down only what he knows. I have guesses enough of my own. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
If a program is useful, it must be changed.
If a program is useful, it will have to be changed.
If a program is useful, it will have to be changed. Laws of Computer Programming, III
If a program is useless, it will have to be documented.
If a program is useless, it will have to be documented. Laws of Computer Programming, IV
If a project is not worth doing at all, it is not worth doing well.
If a sight is worth seeing, someone will build a highway to it.
If a string has one end, it has an other.
If a string has one end, it has another.
If a tool is put away when you're sure it won't be needed again, it will. Soon.
If a town has one lawyer, he starves; if it has two lawyers, they both get rich.
If a tree falls and hits a mime, does he make a sound?
If a tree fell on a florist,would he make a sound?
If a woman rebels against high-heeled shoes, she should take care to do it in a very smart hat. George Bernard Shaw
If all be true that I do think, There be Five Reasons why one should Drink; Good friends, good wine, or being dry, Or lest we should be by-and-by, Or any other reason why.
If all economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion. George Bernard Shaw
If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error. | John Kenneth Galbraith
If all else fails, immortality can be assured by spectacular error.
If all else fails, read the directions
If all else fails, you are almost there.
If all fails, READ THE DOCS !
If all goes well, you've overlooked something
If all goes well, you've overlooked something !
If all is not lost, then where is it?
If all mankind were suddenly to practice honesty, many thousands of people would be sure to starve. G. C. Lichtenberg
If all the ladies bend over, I would be very happy.
If all the world's a stage, I sure got lousy seats.
If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door. | Paul Beatty
If all the world's economists were laid end to end, we wouldn't reach a conclusion. | William Baumol
If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail
If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. Anonymous
If ambition doesn't hurt, you do not have it.
If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.
If an experiment works, something has gone wrong. Finagle's First Law
If an experiment works, you must be using the wrong equipment.
If an injury has to be done to a man it should be so severe that his vengeance need not be feared. Niccol Machiavelli
If an item is advertised as "under $50", you can bet it's not $19.95.|
If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
If anyone has an idea why I do this, keep it to yourself.
If anything -can't- go wrong, it will
If anything can go wrong, it will.
If anything can go wrong, it will. (Murphy's Law)
If anything can go wrong, it will. Murphy's Law
If at first we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure.
If at first you don't succeed - suck another seed.
If at first you don't succeed read the manual Montgomery's Maxim
If at first you don't succeed, call it Ver 1.0
If at first you don't succeed, call it Ver 1.0 !
If at first you don't succeed, call it Ver 1.0.
If at first you don't succeed, call it version 1.0
If at first you don't succeed, change the rules
If at first you don't succeed, cry.
If at first you don't succeed, deny you even tried.
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you have tried. Rule of Failure
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
If at first you don't succeed, fake it
If at first you don't succeed, fake it !
If at first you don't succeed, forget it.
If at first you don't succeed, give up, no use being a damn fool.
If at first you don't succeed, give up.  No use being a damn fool.
If at first you don't succeed, hide your astonishment.
If at first you don't succeed, join the club.
If at first you don't succeed, lower your standards.
If at first you don't succeed, quit; don't be a nut about success.
If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.
If at first you don't succeed, the hell with it.
If at first you don't succeed, transform your data set.
If at first you don't succeed, try again at second base.
If at first you don't succeed, try skydiving ...
If at first you don't succeed, try, try again Proverb
If at first you don't succeed, work for Microsoft.
If at first you don't succeed, you'll get lots of advice.
If at first you don't succeed, you're about normal.
If at first you don't succeed, you're doing about average.
If at first you don't succeed, you've failed failed again
If at first you don't succeed; Blame everyone else.
If at first you don't succeed; call it Windows.
If at first you don't succeed; destroy all evidence that you tried.
If at first you don't succeed; read the instructions.
If at first you don't succeed; so much for skydiving.
If at first you don't suceed, you're about normal.
If at first you doubt, doubt again.
If bankers can count, how come they have eight windows and only four tellers?
If brains were dynamite you couldn't blow your nose!
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization. Weinberg's Second Law
If by saying that all men are born equal, you mean that they are equally born, it is true, but true in no other sense; birth, talent, labor, virtue, and providence, are forever making differences. Eugene Edwards
If code was meant to be portable, it'd have wheels...
If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in.
If corn oil is made from corn, what's baby oil made from?
If cows could fly, everyone would carry an umbrella.
If credit can possibly go to someone else, it will.
If dogbark=true .then. mailman = present
If entropy is increasing, where is it coming from?
If every fool wore a crown, we would all be kings.
If everything is coming your way then you're in the wrong lane.
If everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
If everything seems to be going well, you've probably overlooked something.
If evolution is outlawed, only outlaws will evolve.
If facts do not conform to the theory, they must be disposed of.
If fame is only to come after death, I am in no hurry for it. Martial
If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing. Anatole France
If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it's still a foolish thing. | B. Russell
If flies couldn't fly, would they be called walks?
If guns are outlawed, can we use swords?
If happiness is in your destiny, you need not be in a hurry.
If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how incapable must Man be of learning from experience! George Bernard Shaw
If honor be your clothing, the suit will last a lifetime; but if clothing be your honor, it will soon be worn threadbare. William Arnot
If humans have orgasms, do the Borg have Borgasms?
If idiots could fly, then this would be an airport.
If idiots could fly, this would be an airport.
If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?
If ignorance is bliss, why aren't there more happy people?
If in doubt, make it sound convincing.
If indeed you must be candid, be candid beautifully. Khalil Gibran
If it ain't borken, don't fix it.
If it ain't broke, break it and charge for repair.
If it ain't broke, don't fix it !!!
If it ain't broke, hit it harder.
If it ain't broke, let me have a shot at it....
If it ain't broke, wait a day or two
If it ain't broke, wait a day or two !
If it ain't one thing, it's two or three...
If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway. Lowery's Law
If it does exist, it's out of date. Arnold's Second Law of Documentation
If it doesn't matter, it does not matter.
If it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter.
If it falls on your head you know it's a rock
If it feels good do it, and if it does good feel it.
If it feels good, don't do it.
If it glows don't touch it!
If it happens, it must be possible.
If it has feelings, its not cooked enough!
If it has tits or tyres, there will be problems.
If it helps to make people think a little bit more what those ideals are, then I'll keep wearing this uniform. Barbara Adams, Alternate Whitewhater juror, after being rejected for wearing her Star Fleet uniform to court, 1996
If it is to be, it is up to me.
If it is worth fighting for, it is worth fighting dirty for.
If it isn't borken, don't fix it.
If it isn't broken, don't fix it.
If it isn't original, it isn't sin.
If it isn't true, at least it is a happy invention.
If it jams -- force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
If it jams, force it.  If it breaks, it needed replacement anyway.
If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing
If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing.
If it jams, force it....If it breaks, it needed replacing
If it looks easy, it's tough.  If it looks tough, it's damn well impossible.
If it looks easy, it's tough. If it looks tough, it's almost impossible.
If it pours before seven, it has rained by eleven.
If it says "one size fits all," it doesn't fit anyone.
If it screams it's not food......yet.  <<Evil Grin>>
If it screams, it's best not to eat it.
If it screams, it's not food... yet.
If it should exist, it doesn't. Arnold's First Law of Documentation
If it was easy, it wouldn't be any fun.
If it was easy, they wouldn't need us.
If it was raining soup, I'd have a knife & fork
If it wasn't for C we'd be using BASI, PASAL, and OBOL!
If it wasn't for EZ-RDR it would be hard.
If it wasn't so cool out today, it would be warmer.
If it wasn't so warm out today, it would be cooler.
If it were absolutely necessary to choose, I would rather be guilty of an immoral act than of a cruel one. Anatole France
If it were not for the company of fools, a witty man would often be greatly at a loss. Franois de La Rochefoucould
If it were not for the intellectual snobs who pay, the arts would perish with their starving practitionerslet us thank heaven for hypocrisy. Aldous Huxley
If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would ever get done.
If it works tinker till it doesn't
If it works, Don't fix it.
If it works, I didn't do it.
If it works, break it!
If it works, don't fix it !
If it works, don't fix it.
If it works, it must be obsolete.
If it works, rip it apart and find out why
If it works, rip it apart and find out why !
If it works, something went wrong.
If it works, tear it apart and find out why!
If it works, you must have done something wrong.
If it's Tuesday, this must be someone else's fortune.
If it's fixed, don't break it !
If it's free, it costs too much.
If it's good, they discontinued it.
If it's not Scottish IT'S CRRAAAPPP
If it's not broke, let me take a crack at it.
If it's not going to plan, maybe there never was a plan.
If it's not on fire, it's a software problem.
If it's not one thing it's another Proverb
If it's not worth doing, it's not worth doing well.
If it's obvious, it's obviously wrong.
If it's seems to Good to be True: IT IS!!!
If it's stupid and it works - its not stupid.
If it's stupid and works, then it ain't stupid
If it's stupid, but it works, then it's not stupid.
If it's too loud, you're too old.|Bumper sticker
If it's tourist season, where do I get a license?
If it's useless, it will have to be documented.
If it's working OK, then something's GOTTA be wrong
If its stupid and it works - its not SO stupid.
If life gives you lemons, make lemonade.
If life is a stage, I want some better lighting.
If life is but a Dream, please wake me up.
If life is but a dream please wake me up.
If little else, the brain is an educational toy.
If little green men land in your back yard, hide any little green women you've got in the house. | Mike Harding, "The Armchair Anarchist's Almanac"
If love is blind, lingerie makes great braille.
If love is blind, why is Lingerie so popular?
If love means never having to say you're sorry, then marriage means always having to say everything twice. Estelle Getty
If man has good corn, or wood, or boards, or pigs to sell, or can make better chairs or knives, crucibles, or church organs, than anybody else, you will find a broad, hard-beaten road to his house, tho it be in the woods. Ralph Waldo Emerson
If marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws.
If mathematically you end up with the wrong answer, try multiplying by the page number.
If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?
If men would consider not so much where they differ, as wherein they agree, there would be far less of uncharitableness and angry feeling in the world. Joseph Addison
If misery loves company, misery has company enough. Henry David Thoreau
If money can't buy happiness, I guess you'll just have to rent it.
If money doesn't grow on tree's, why do banks have branches?
If money is your hope for independence you will never have it. The only real security that a man will have in this world is a reserve of knowledge, experience, and ability. Henry Ford
If money talks, Being a SysOp is pretty quiet!
If more than one person is responsible for a bug, no one is at fault.
If my girlfriend caught me on this board...
If my husband ever met a woman on the street who looked like one of his paintings he would faint. Jacqueline Roque, wife of Pable Picasso
If nature had arranged that husbands and wives should have children alternatively, there would never be more than three in a family. Laurence Housman
If no one uses it, there's a reason.
If nobody measures up, check your yardstick.
If nobody uses it, there's a reason.
If nobody uses it, there's a reason. Rule of Reason
If not controlled, work flows to the competent person until he is submerged.
If nothing is impossible, how do you get off a mailing list? -Dik.
If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours. Henry David Thoreau
If one advances confidently in the directions of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours. Henry David Thoreau
If one cannot catch a bird of paradise, grab a wet hen.
If one man can be allowed to determine for himself what is law, every man can. That means first chaos, then tyranny. Legal process is an essential part of the democratic process. Felix Frankfurter
If one sticks to rigidly to ones principles one would hardly see anybody.
If one studies too zealously, one easily loses his pants. -- A. Einstein.
If one word does not succeed, ten thousand are of no avail.
If only Einstein had a 486DX-33....
If only Einstein had a 486DX-33....   like I do...
If only God would give me some clear sign  Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank. | Woody Allen, "Without Feathers"
If only I could be respected without having to be respectable.
If only I still had my Apple ][... If only...
If only I still had my Commodore 64... If only...
If only one could get that wonderful feeling of accomplishment without having to accomplish anything.
If only the people who worry about their liabilities would think about the riches they do possess, they would stop worrying. Dale Carnegie
If only women came with pull-down menus and online help.
If only youth knew... If only age could!
If passion drives you, let reason hold the reins.
If people listened to themselves more often, they would talk less.
If people listened to themselves, they would shut up.
If people turn to look at you on the street, you are not well dressed. Beau Brummel
If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is also true of trouble. Elbert Hubbard
If plugging it in doesn't help, turn it on.
If poverty is the mother of crimes, want of sense is the father. Jean de La Bruyre
If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, why practice?
If punishment makes not the will supple it hardens the offender. John Locke
If puns are outlawed, only outlaws will have puns.
If rabbits feet are so lucky, what happened to the rabbit
If rabbits feet are so lucky, what happened to the rabbit?
If rabbits feet are so lucky,what happened to the rabbit
If rabbits' feet are so lucky, what happened to the rabbit?
If reality wants to get in touch, it knows where I am.
If rich, eat when you please. If poor, eat when you can.
If sanity were dollars I'd be bankrupt.
If scientific reasoning were limited to the logical processes of arithmetic, we should not get very far in our understanding of the physical world. One might as well attempt to grasp the game of poker entirely by the use of the mathematics of probability. | Vannevar Bush
If screwups were dollars, I'd be a millionaire!!
If sensuality were happiness, beasts were happier than men; but human felicity is lodged in the soul, not in the flesh. Seneca
If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to? Bette Midler, singer and actress Everbody sets out to do something, and everybody does something, but no one does what he sets out to do. George Moore
If she [America] forgets where she came from, if the people lose sight of what brought them along, if she listens to the deniers and mockers, then will begin the rot and dissolution. Carl Sandburg
If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on a vacation. Kin Hubbard
If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on vacation.
If someone had told me I would be Pope one day, I would have studied harder. | Pope John Paul I
If someone says he will do something "without fail," he won't. | Ozman's Law
If something happened along the route and you had to leave your children with Bob Dole or Bill Clinton, I think you would probably leave them with Bob Dole. Bob Dole, US Senate Majority Leader and presidential candidate, speaking in the third person, 1996
If space is a vacuum, who changes the bags?
If speed kills, Windows users may live forever.
If speed scares you, buy Windows 3.1
If speed scares you, try Micro$oft Windows.
If speed scares you, try Windows...
If speed scares you, use Micro$oft Windows !
If that vital spark that we find in a grain of wheat can pass unchanged through countless deaths and resurrections, will the spirit of man be unable to pass from this body to another? William Jennings Bryan
If the Almighty were to rebuild the world and asked me for advice, I would have English Channels round every country. And the atmosphere would be such that anything which attempted to fly would be set on fire. Sir Winston Churchill
If the American dream is for Americans only, it will remain our dream and never be our destiny. Ren de Visme Williamson
If the B-2 is invisible, just announce you've built 100 of them and don't build them. John Kasich (House Budget Committee Chairman)
If the French were really intelligent, they'd speak English. Wilfred Sheed
If the Message Won't End, Continue It.
If the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch. Matthew 15:14
If the car industry behaved like the computer industry over the last 30 years, a Rolls-Royce would cost $5, get 300 miles per gallon, and blow up once a year killing all passengers inside. Anonymous
If the code and the comments disagree, then both are probably wrong. | Norm Schryer
If the creator had a purpose in equipping us with a neck, he surely meant us to stick it out. Arthur Koestler
If the customer wants vanilla, give him vanilla.
If the facts do not conform to the theory, they must be disposed of.
If the facts do not conform to the theory, they must be disposed of. Maier's Law
If the facts do not conform to your theory, they must be disposed of.
If the family skeleton must remain, make it dance.
If the force so strong with Yoda is, why in proper order a sentence contruct cannot he?
If the hours are long enough and the pay is short enough, someone will say it's women's work. Anonymous
If the odds are a million to one against something occuring, chances are 50-50 it will. Anonymous
If the odds are a million to one against something occurring, chances are 50-50 it will.
If the opposite of "pro" is "con", then what's the opposite of "progress"?
If the other person injures you, you may forget the injury; but if you injure him you will always remember. Kahlil Gibran
If the probability of success is not almost 1, then it is damned near 0.
If the shoe fits, it's ugly. Gold's Law
If the shoe fits, its ugly.
If the shoe fits, put it in your mouth.
If the shoe fits, try wearing it on the other foot; that's bound to make you feel better.
If the world should blow itself up, the last audible voice would be that of an expert saying it can't be done. Peter Ustinov
If there are epigrams, there must be meta-epigrams.
If there are two or more ways to do something, and one of those ways can result in a catastrophe, then someone will do it. Murphy's Original Law
If there had been a censorship of the press in Rome we should have had today neither Horace nor Juvenal, nor the philosophical writings of Cicero. Voltaire
If there is a God, atheism must seem to Him as less of an insult than religion. Goncourt
If there is a God, how come he allows Bonnie Langford to exist?
If there is a country in the world where concord, according to common calculation, would be least expected, it is America. Thomas Paine
If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong.
If there is a way to delay in important decision, the good bureaucracy, public or private, will find it. |Parkinson's Fifth Law
If there is anything better than to be loved it is loving. Anonymous
If there is no God, who pops up the Kleenex?
If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?
If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?| Art Hoppe
If there is no hell, a good many preachers are obtaining money under false pretenses. William A. Sunday
If there is no wind, row.
If there is no wind, row. Latin Proverb
If there is one word that describes our form of society in America, it may be the wordvoluntary. Lyndon Baines Johnson
If there isn't a law, there will be -- Gates' Law
If there isn't a law, there will be.
If there was a nuclear bombing, would I be alive to care?
If there was a wait for Q to show up, would there be a Q-wait?
If there was less sympathy in the world, there would be less trouble in the world. Oscar Wilde
If there were no bad speculations there could be no good investments; if there were no wild ventures there would be no brilliantly successful enterprises. F. W. Hirst
If there's anything a public servant hates to do it's something for the public. Kin Hubbard
If there's one thing I can't stand, it's intolerance.
If they don't like ARJ, they can eat Z..!
If they want peace, nations should avoid the pin-pricks that precede cannonshots. Napoleon Bonaparte
If thine enemy offend thee, give his child a drum.
If thine enemy offend thee, give his child a drum. Anonymous
If things appear to be going well, you have overlooked something.
If things were left to chance, they'd be better.
If this fortune didn't exist, somebody would have invented it.
If this is Quarqsday,THIS must be Earth!
If this is a battle, then you have already lost.
If this is a consular ship... where is the Fung?"
If this is heaven, why am I bored out of my skull?
If this is only a hobby..then why I am getting paid!!
If this is time-sharing, give me my share right now.  It's not time yet.
If this is timesharing, give me my share right now.
If this message goes into the void, call me!
If this were an actual tagline, it would be funny.
If this were funny, it'd be a tagline.
If this were subjunctive, I'm in the wrong mood.
If three people say you are an ass, put on a bridle.
If three people say you are an ass, put on a bridle. Spanish Proverb
If time heals all wounds, how come the belly button stays the same?
If time heals all wounds, why does the belly button stay the same?
If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happen if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it? Stephen Wright
If truth is stranger than fiction, you must be truth!
If turning it on doesn't help, plug it in.
If two men agree on everything, you may be sure that one of them is doing the thinking. | Lyndon Baines Johnson
If two people agree all the time, one of them is unnecessary.
If voting changed anything, they'd make it illegal.
If we are to live together in peace, we must come to know each other better. Lyndon Baines Johnson
If we begin with certainties, we shall end in doubts; but if we begin with doubts, and are patient in them, we shall end in certainties. Francis Bacon
If we believe absurdities, we shall commit atrocities.
If we can't fix it - it's broken
If we can't turn the world around we can at least bolster the victems. Liz Carpenter
If we could first know where we are, and whither we are tending, we could then better judge what to do, and how to do it. Abraham Lincoln
If we could have a little patience, we should escape much mortification; time takes away as much as it gives. Marquise de Svign
If we desire respect for the law, we must first make the law respectable. Louis D. Brandeis
If we desire to avoid insult, we must be able to repel it; if we desire to secure peace, one of the most powerful instruments of our rising prosperity, it must be known, that we are at all times ready for War. George Washington
If we devote our time disparaging the products of our business rivals, we hurt business generally, reduce confidence, and increase discontent. Edward N. Hurley
If we do not change our direction we are likely to end up where we are headed.
If we do not succeed, then we run the risk of failure. | Vice President Dan Quayle
If we do not succeed, we run the risk of failure. Dan Quayle
If we don't succeed, we increase our chances at failure.
If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant; if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome. Anne Bradstreet
If we have everything to gain by change, relax.
If we have not quiet in our minds, outward comfort will do no more for us than a golden slipper on a gouty foot. John Bunyan
If we have nothing to lose by change, relax.
If we left the bones out it wouldn't be crunchy
If we left the bones out it wouldn't be crunchy!
If we left the bones out it wouldn't be crunchy.
If we lose much by having things go wrong, take all possible care.
If we resist our passions, it is more through their weakness than from our strength. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
If we resort to lawlessness, the only thing we can hope for is civil war, untold bloodshed, and the end of our dreams. Archie Lee Moore
If we survive danger it steels our courage more than anything else. Reinhold Niebuhr
If we took the bones out, it wouldn't be crunchy, would it?
If we were not in Vietnam, all that part of the world would be enjoying the obscurity it so richly deserves. John Kenneth Galbraith
If we weren't supposed to juggle, tennis balls wouldn't come three to a can.
If winning isn't important then why keep score?
If wishes were horses then beggars would ride Proverb
If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.
If wishes were horses, dogfood would be a lot cheaper.
If work were good for you, the rich would leave none for the poor. Haitian proverb
If worst comes to worst, you *CAN* turn most things off.
If wrinkles must be written upon our brows, let them not be written upon the heart. The spirit should never grow old. James A. Garfield
If written correctly, legalese is perfectly incomprehensible.
If ya can't beat 'em.......RUN!
If ya can't feed em', don't breed em' !!!
If ya can't say anything nice, sit by me.
If you act enthusiastic, you'll be enthusiastic !
If you act like a dumbshit, they'll treat you like an equal.
If you always postpone pleasure you will never have it.  Quit work and play for once.
If you always postpone pleasure you will never have it. Quit work and play
If you always postpone pleasure you will never have it. Quit work and play!
If you are a host to your guest, be a host to his dog also. Russian Proverb
If you are content, you have enough to live comfortably. Plautus
If you are given a take-home exam, you will forget where you live.|
If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.|
If you are not too large for the place you occupy, you are too small for it. James A. Garfield, US President
If you are out of trouble, watch for danger. Sophocles
If you are out to describe the truth, leave elegance to the tailor. Albert Einstein
If you are patient in a moment of anger, you will escape a hindred days of sorrow. Chinese Proverb
If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm. Vince Lombardi
If you aren't going all the way, why go at all?
If you aren't rich, you should always look useful.
If you ask how much it is, you can't afford it.
If you believe THAT, I have a BRIDGE for sale...
If you believe in gambling, in the end you will sell your house.
If you believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.
If you believe that feeling bad or worrying long enough will change a past or future event, then you are residing on another planet with a different reality system. Anonymous
If you bow at all, bow low. Chinese Proverb
If you can be well without health, you may be happy without virtue. Edmund Burke
If you can find something everyone agrees on, it's wrong. Mo Udall
If you can kill a snake with it, it ain't art. -- Orcenith Lyle Bonge
If you can lead it to water and force it to drink, it isn't a horse.
If you can read this tagline, you're 2 close!
If you can read this you have a modem.
If you can read this, you are too close.
If you can read this, you're in range.
If you can read this, you're irrelevant. | Borg
If you can see the floor, it doesn't need to be cleaned.
If you can survive death, you can probably survive anything.
If you can't answer a man's argument, all is not lost; you can still call him vile names. Elbert Hubbard
If you can't be famous, try infamous.
If you can't be good, be careful.
If you can't be good, be careful.  If you can't be careful, give me a call.
If you can't be offensive WHY BOTHER?
If you can't beat em', mod em'.
If you can't beat your computer at chess, try kickboxing.
If you can't bite, don't show your teeth.
If you can't convince them - confuse them.| Harry S. Truman
If you can't convince them, confuse them. Harry S Truman
If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance, baffle 'em with bullshit.
If you can't debug it, deplug it.
If you can't elucidate, obfuscate.
If you can't go over, you must go under. Jewish Proverb
If you can't have faith in what is held up to you for faith, you must find things in yourself, for a life without faith in something is too narrow a place to live. George E. Woodberry
If you can't hear me, it's because I'm in parentheses. Stephen Wright
If you can't ignore an insult, top it; if you can't top it, laugh it off; and if you can't laugh it off, it's probably deserved. Russell Lynes
If you can't laugh at yourself, I'll laugh at you.
If you can't laugh at yourself, make fun of other people.
If you can't learn to do it well, learn to enjoy doing it badly.
If you can't learn to do it well, you should learn to enjoy doing it badly. Ashleigh's First Law
If you can't lick 'em, join 'em. American Proverb
If you can't live without me, why aren't you dead ?
If you can't make it good, make it LOOK good." B. Gates
If you can't make it good, make it big.
If you can't make it good, make it expensive.
If you can't make it work, make a statistic of it.
If you can't return a favour, pass it on. Louise Brown
If you can't say it in 50 characters, then don't b
If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying. It's the worry that gets you, not the lack of sleep. Dale Carnegie
If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen. Harry S Truman
If you can't think of a tagline, steal one! (like I do!)
If you can't win, make the fellow ahead of you break the record. Anonymous
If you cannot catch a Bird of Paradise, better take a wet hen. Nikita Kruschev
If you cannot convince them, confuse them.
If you cannot convince them, confuse them.| Harry S Truman
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton you might as well make it dance. George Bernard Shaw
If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance. George Bernard Shaw
If you change lines, the one you just left will start to move faster than the one you are now in. O'Brian's Law
If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
If you come up with a lemon, make lemonade.
If you compare ours with the best of French wines, we are definitely not there. But if you compare it to the worst of French wines, we are definitely better. (Anonymous Vintner), near Bangalore India, 1994
If you continually give you will continually have.
If you did manage to get any good shots, they will be ruined when someone inadvertently opens the darkroom door and all of the dark leaks out. The Third Law of Photography
If you didn't get caught, did you really do it?
If you do big things they print your face, and if you do little things they print only your thumbs. Arthur 'Bugs' Baer
If you do not change your direction, you may end where you are headed.
If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people. Virginia Woolfe
If you do something which you are sure will meet with everybody's approval, somebody won't like it.
If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten.
If you don't advertise yourself you will be advertised by your loving enemies. Elbert Hubbard
If you don't ask, you'll NEVER know.
If you don't care where you are, then you ain't lost.
If you don't care where you are, then you can't get lost.
If you don't eat garlic, they'll never smell it on you.
If you don't fall down, you're not trying!
If you don't have a memory like an elephant, leave tracks like one.
If you don't have a sense of humor, don't try to be funny.
If you don't have time to do it right you must have time to do it over. Anonymous
If you don't know what it does, don't fool with it!
If you don't know what you're doing, do it neatly.
If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you're old. Ed Howe
If you don't like my opinion of you - improve yourself !
If you don't like the news, go out and make some of your
If you don't like the news, go out and make some of your own.|Bumper sticker
If you don't like the weather in New England, just wait a few minutes. Mark Twain
If you don't make mistakes you don't make anything.
If you don't run your own life, somebody else will. John Atkinson
If you don't say anything, you won't be called on to repeat it. Calvin Coolidge
If you don't think women are explosive, drop one
If you don't think women are explosive, drop one!
If you don't try new solutions, then you can expect new evils.
If you don't understand it, squash it.
If you don't want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work Ogden Nash
If you drink like a fish, don't drive. Swim. Joe E. Lewis
If you eat a live toad every morning, nothing worse will happen to you all day.
If you eat yogurt, you'll have lots of culture.
If you ever have to support a flagging conversation, introduce the topic of eating. Leigh Hunt
If you expected it to be easy, you should have become a politician.
If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will.
If you find it, it is always in the last place you look.
If you follow reason far enough it always leads to conclusions that are contrary to reason. Samuel Butler
If you fool around with something long enough, it will eventually break.
If you get all the facts, your judgment can be right; if you don't get all the facts, it can't be right. Bernard M. Baruch
If you get angry at a newspaper columnist, he'll get rich or famous or both.
If you get up one time more than you fall you will make it through.
If you give Congress a chance to vote on both sides of an issue, it will always do it. | Les Aspin, D., Wisconsin
If you give a person a fish, they'll fish for a day.  But if you train a person to fish, they'll fish for a lifetime. | Vice President Dan Quayle
If you give me six lines written by the hand of the most honest of men, I will find something in them which will hang him. Richelieu
If you go in for argument, take care of your temper. Your logic, if you have any, will take care of itself. Joseph Farrell
If you had any brains, you'd be dangerous.
If you had one less chromosome, you'd be a Simpson!
If you had to have a diploma or a GED to collect unemployment, you'd see a lot more kids staying in school. Wayne Knight, actor, on Politically Incorrect, 1995
If you have a procedure with 10 parameters, you probably missed some.
If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time-a tremendous whack. Winston Churchill
If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third timea tremendous whack. Sir Winston Churchill
If you have anything really valuable to contribute to the world it will come through the expression of your own personality, that single spark of divinity that sets you off and makes you different from every other living creature. Bruce Barton
If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them. Henry David Thoreau
If you have knowledge, let others light their candles in it. Margaret Fuller
If you have no enemies, you are apt to be in the same predicament in regard to friends. Elbert Hubbard
If you have no feelings about worldly things, they are all Buddhism; if you have feelings about Buddhism, it is a worldly thing. Zen Saying
If you have nothing to do, don't do it here.
If you have nothing to say, please only say it once
If you have nothing to say, please only say it once!
If you have to ask what jazz is, you'll never know.
If you have to be responsible, it's not power.
If you have to keep reminding yourself of a thing, perhaps it isn't so. Christopher Morley
If you have to tell people you're famous, you aren't.
If you have to travel on a Titanic, why not go first class?
If you haven't found something strange during the day,
If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest. Kin Hubbard
If you haven't struck oil in the first three minutes-stop boring! George Jessel Do not accustom yourself to consider debt only as an inconvenience. You will find it a calamity. Samuel Johnson
If you hear an Onion ring, please answer it
If you hear an onion ring, answer it. Anonymous
If you hit every time, the target's too near.
If you itch for it, scratch for it.
If you just set out to be liked, you would be prepared to compromise on anything at any time, and you would achieve nothing. Margaret Thatcher
If you keep anything long enough, you can throw it away.
If you keep your mouth shut you will never put your foot in it. Austin O'Malley
If you knew how meat was made, you'd probably lose your lunch. I'm from cattle country. That's why I became a vegetarian. K.D. Lang, singer and songwriter, magazine advertisement, 1990
If you knew what Mona Lisa knew, you'd smile too.
If you lead a country like Britain, a strong country, a country which has taken a lead in world affairs in good times and in bad, a country that is always reliable, then you have to have a touch of iron about you. Margaret Thatcher
If you leave 2 bills together, they breed !
If you like laws and sausages, you should never watch either one being made. Otto von Bismarck
If you live in a country run by committee, be on the committee. | Graham Summer
If you live long enough, it WILL kill you...
If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age. George Burns
If you look at life one way, there is always cause for alarm. Elizabeth Bowen
If you look just close enough, you can see anything you want.
If you love life, it will love you back.
If you love something set it free. If it doesn't return, hunt it down.
If you love the sacred and despise the ordinary, you are still bobbing in the ocean of delusion. Lin-Chi
If you make a mistake you right it immediately to the best of your ability.
If you make a mistake, you right it immediately to the best of your ability.
If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; but if you really make them think they'll hate you.
If you meet Ken Thompson on the road, kill him.
If you mess with a thing long enough, it'll break.
If you mess with something long enough it'll break.
If you must hold yourself up to your children as an object lesson, hold yourself up as a warning and not an example. George Bernard Shaw
If you must play, decide on three things at the start: the rules of he game, the stakes, and the quitting time. Chinese proverb
If you must speak ill of another, do not speak it... write it in the sand near the water's edge. Napoleon Hill
If you need a calculator, its too complex.
If you need four screws for the job, the first three are easy to find. The N-1 Law
If you need n items of anything, you will have n - 1 in stock.
If you once forfeit the confidence of your fellow citizens, you can never regain their respect and esteem. You may fool all of the people some of the time; you can even fool some of the people all the time; but you can't fool all of the people all of the time. Abraham Lincoln
If you only have a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail. | Maslow
If you pay peanuts, you get monkeys.
If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which a procedure can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way will promptly develop.
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you.  This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. | Mark Twain
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. Mark Twain
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a man and a dog. Mark Twain
If you prick me, do I not get turned on?
If you pull the wings off a fly, does it become a walk?
If you push something hard enough, it will fall over.
If you push the "extra ice" button on the soft drink vending machine, you won't get any ice.  If you push the "no ice" button, you'll get ice, but no cup.
If you put garbage in a computer nothing comes out but garbage.  But this garbage, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow enobled and none dare criticize it.
If you put it off long enough, it might go away.
If you really need an officer in a hurry, take a nap. Murphy's Eighth Military Law
If you really put a small value upon yourself, rest assured that the world will not raise your price. Anonymous
If you really want to know, you won't ask me.
If you redo a batch file, does it become a son of a batch ?
If you redo a batch file, is it a son of a batch?
If you refuse to accept anything but the best you very often get it.
If you reveal your secrets to the wind you should not blame the wind for revealing them to the trees. Khalil Gibran
If you run after two hares, you will catch neither.
If you save the world too often, it begins to expect it.
If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back? Stephen Wright
If you scatter thorns, don't go barefoot. Italian Proverb
If you see a bright streak in the sky coming at you, duck. | Satellite Safety Tip #14
If you see a tennis player who looks as if he is working hard, then that means he isn't very good. Helen Willis Moody
If you see a whole thing, it seems that it's always beautiful. Planets, lives.... But close up a world's all dirt and rocks. And day to day, life's a hard job, you get tired, you lose the pattern. Ursula K. LeGuin
If you see an onion ring - answer it!
If you see in your wine the reflection of a person not in your range of vision, don't drink it. Chinese Proverb
If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies in yourself. Native American Proverb (Minquass)
If you seek, how is that different from pursuing sound and form? If you don't seek, how are you different from earth, wood, or stone? You must seek without seeking. Fo-Yan
If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?
If you smoke after sex, you're doing it too fast.
If you stand up to be counted someone will take your seat.
If you stay up all night wondering where the sun is, it will dawn on you.
If you stop arguing for a moment, you'd see that I'm right!
If you suffer, thank God! It is a sure sign that you are alive. Elbert Hubbard
If you suspect a man, don't employ him, and if ypu employ him, don't suspect him. Chinese Proverb
If you suspect a man, don't employ him.
If you suveyed a hundred typical middle-aged Americans, I bet you'd find that only two of them could tell you their blood types, but every last one of them would know the theme song from the 'Beverly Hillbillies'. Dave Barry
If you take the plunge, return it by Tuesday.
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire. Cannon's Law
If you think YOU have a lot to remember, imagine being a chromosome.
If you think before you speak the other guy gets his joke in first.
If you think big enough, you'll never have to do it. | Reisner's Rule of Conceptual Inertia
If you think education is expensive - try ignorance.| Derek Bok
If you think education is expensive, try ignorance.
If you think last Tuesday was a drag, wait till you see what happens tomorrow
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments. -- Earl Wilson
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.| Earl Wilson
If you think talk is cheap, try hiring a lawyer.
If you think the United States has stood still, who built the largest shopping center in the world?| Richard Nixon
If you think this fortune is confusing, then change one pig.
If you think yesterday was a drag, just wait until you see tomorrow!
If you think you have no faults, that makes one.
If you thought yesterday was bad, wait till you see what happens today.
If you throw a cat out the car window, is it kitty litter?
If you throw mud,  you will have dirty hands.
If you took the bones out, it wouldn't be crunchy, eh?
If you torture the data long enough, they will confess.
If you treat people right they will treat you right - ninty percent of the time. Franklin D. Roosevelt
If you treat people right they will treat you right; 90 per cent of the time.
If you try to be too sharp, you will cut yourself.
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
If you try to please everyone, somebody is not going to like it.
If you use a portrait monitor, does your mousemat have to be sideways?
If you wait, it will go away. Hellrung's Law
If you wake up Sleepy & Grumpy, you must be Snow White.
If you wake up and find yourself a success, then you haven't been asleep.
If you wanna know the value of money, try to borrow some.
If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster.
If you want it done right, do it yourself !
If you want it done right, let  do it.
If you want my advice, pay me!
If you want someone to keep a secret, keep it yourself.
If you want something badly, that is how you get it.
If you want something done, ask a busy person to do it. The more things you do, the more you can do. Lucille Ball
If you want to be respected, you must respect yourself. Spanish Proverb
If you want to cheer up, cheer up someone.
If you want to feel rich, just count all of the things you have that money can't buy. Anonymous
If you want to gather honey, don't kick over the beehive. Dale Carnegie
If you want to get across an idea, wrap it up in a person. Ralph Bunche
If you want to hide your face, walk naked.
If you want to kill time, why not try working it to death?
If you want to know how old a man is, ask his brother-in-law.
If you want to know how old a woman is, ask her sister-in-law.
If you want to recapture your youth, just cut off his allowance. Al Bernstein
If you want work well done, select a busy man - the other kind has no time Elbert Hubbard Cultivate only the habits that you are willing should master you. Elbert Hubbard
If you want your dreams to come true, don't sleep. Yiddish Proverb
If you want your eggs hatched, sit on them yourself. Haitian proverb
If you want your name spelt wrong, die.
If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer? Stephen Wright
If you wish good advice, consult an old man. Romanian Proverb
If you wish to appear agreeable in society, you must consent to be taught many things which you know already. Johann Kaspar Lavater
If you wish to succeed, consult three old people.
If you wish your merit to be known, acknowledge that of other people. Oriental Proverb
If you wish, You will have an opportunity.
If you would be pope, you must think of nothing else. Spanish Proverb
If you would be pungent, be brief; for it is with words as wwwwith sunbeamsthe more they are condensed, the deeper they burn. Robert Southey
If you would be wealthy, think of saving as well as getting. Benjamin Franklin
If you would keep a secret from an enemy, tell it not to a friend.
If you would know the value of money, go try to borrow some; for he that goes a-borrowing goes a-sorrowing. Benjamin Franklin
If you would live healthy, be old early. Spanish Proverb
If you would persuade, you must appeal to interest rather than intellect. Benjamin Franklin
If you would thoroughly know anything, teach it to others. Tryon Edwards
If you're a typical student, consider the fact there is
If you're early, it's cancelled, if you're on time, it's late, if you're late, you're late.
If you're feeling good, don't worry. You'll get over it.
If you're feeling good, don't worry; you'll get over it.
If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late. Henny Youngman
If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late. | Henny Youngman
If you're gonna get down...Get Down and Prey!
If you're happy, you're successful.
If you're in trouble, or hurt or needgo to the poor people. They're the only ones that'll helpthe only ones. John Steinbeck
If you're not confused, you're not paying attention.
If you're not part of the solution, then you're part of the precipitate. Anonymous
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
If you're not rejected at least three times a week you're not really trying.
If you're not very clever you should be conciliatory. | Benjamin Disraeli
If you're on fire, avoid gasoline and other flammable materials. | Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
If you're right 90% of the time, why quibble about the remaining 3 percent?
If you're there before it's over, you're on time. James J. Walker
If you're too old to learn, you were born so.
If you're trying to drive me crazy, you're too late
If you've done six impossible things before breakfast, why not round it off with dinner at Milliway's, the restaurant at the end of the universe?
If you've got part of it, flaunt that part.
If you've seen one nuclear war, you've seen 'em all.
If you've seen one redwood, you've seen them all. | Ronald Reagan
If your aim in life is nothing; you can't miss.
If your attack is going well, then it's an ambush..
If your behind is in front, you turned around!
If your bread is stale, make toast.
If your capacity to acquire has outstripped your capacity to enjoy, you are on the way to the scrap-heap. Glen Buck
If your computer speaks english it was probably made in japan.
If your contribution has been vital there will always be somebody to pick up where you left off, and that will be your claim to immortality. Walter Gropius
If your desires are not extravagant they will be granted.
If your feet smell and your nose runs - you're built upside down.
If your feet smell and your nose runs, you were built upside down.
If your head is wax, don't walk in the sun. Benjamin Franklin
If your mind goes blank, remember to turn off the sound.
If your parents didn't have children, odds are that you won't either.
If your sergeant can see you, so can the enemy. Murphy's Sixth Military Law
If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it
If your ship doesn't come in, swim to it.
If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way. Stan Levenson
If youth be a defect, it is one that we outgrow only too soon. James Russell Lowell
If youth but had the knowledge and old age the strength. French Proverb
If youth only had a chance or old age any brains.
If, before going to bed every night, you will tear a page from the calendar, and remark, 'There goes another day of my life, never to return,' you will become time conscious. A. B. Zu Tavern
If, when completion of a design is imminent, field dimensions are finally supplied as they actually are, instead of as they were meant to be, it is always simpler to start over from scratch. Fyfe's Third Law of Revision
If, when the chips are down, the world's most powerful nation, the United States of America, acts like a pitiful, helpless giant, the forces of totalitarianism and anarchy will threaten free nations and free institutions throughout the world. Richard M. Nixon
Ifyoucanreadthis,youspendtoomuchtimefiguringouttaglines.
Ifyoucanreadthisyouspendtoomuchtimefiguringouttaglines.
Ignorance & apathy : I don't know & I don't care.
Ignorance Ignorance is a voluntary misfortune. Nicholas Ling
Ignorance breeds monsters to fill up the vacancies of the soul that are unoccupied by the verities of knowledge. Horace Mann
Ignorance can be cured.  Stupid is forever.
Ignorance is Temporary ... STUPID is Forever
Ignorance is bliss. American Proverb
Ignorance is less hatefill that conceitedness.
Ignorance is stubborn and prejudice is hard. Adlai E. Stevenson
Ignorance is temporary - Stupidity is forever
Ignorance is temporary, stupidity is permanent
Ignorance is temporary. Stupidity is forever.
Ignorance is temporary; stupid is forever.
Ignorance is the mother of adventure.
Ignorance is the night of the mind, but a night without moon or star. Confucius
Ignorance is when you don't know anything and somebody finds it out.
Ignorance leads to Indulgence.
Ignorant men Don't know what good they hold in their hands until They've flung it away. Sophocles
Ignore alien orders.
Ignore previous fortune.
Ignore your teeth and they'll go away!
Illinois isn't exactly the land that God forgot -- it's more like the land He's trying to ignore.
Illiterate ? Write for free help.
Illiterate?  Write for FREE HELP
Illiterate?  Write for a free brochure
Illiterate?  Write for information!
Illusion A pleasant illusion is better than a harsh reality. Christian Nestell Bovee
Imagery is All In The Mind.
Images and reflections to brighten my day.
Imagination You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus. Mark Twain
Imagination disposes of everything; it creates beauty, justice, and happiness, which are everything in this world. Blaise Pascal
Imagination is a quality given a man to compensate him for what he is not, and a sense of humor was provided to console him for what he is. Oscar Wilde
Imagination is more important than knowledge.
Imagination is more important than knowledge. -Einstein
Imagination is not a talent of some men but is the health of every man. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Imagination is one weapon in the war against reality.
Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality.| Jules de Gaultier
Imagination rules the world. Napoleon Bonaparte
Imagine a witty phrase here.
Imagine the Creator as a low comedian, and at once the world becomes explicable. H. L. Mencken
Imagine what Disney could do with this material. There could be a parade... with at least one real prince and one real princess on hand. John Rothchild, news commentator, proposing a sale of Windsor Castle to Disney to improve the royal family's public image, 1996
Imitation Imitation belittles. Christian Nestell Bovee
Immoral Majority Charter Member.
Immorality will continue until beatings improve.
Immortality -- a fate worse than death. | Edgar A. Shoaff
Immortality Only the actions of the just smell sweet and blossom in the dust. James Shirley
Immortality is the genius to move others long after you yourself have stopped moving. Frank Rooney
Impartial, adj.: Unable to perceive any promise of personal advantage from espousing either side of a controversy or adopting either of two conflicting opinions. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Important letters which contain no errors will develop errors in the mail.  Corresponding errors will show up in the duplicate while the Boss is reading it.
Impossibility The Difficult is that which can be done immediately; the Impossible that which takes a little longer. George Santayana
Impossibility: a word only to be found in the dictionary of fools. Napoleon Bonaparte
Imprisoned in .QWK file!  Send the ZIP army!
Impropriety is the soul of wit.
Improve mail delivery... mail the posties their pay!!
Improve your memory, forget about work.
Improved - didn't work the second time.
Improvement If a better system is thine, impart it; if not, make use of mine. Horace
In America the President reigns for four years, and Journalism governs for ever and ever. Oscar Wilde
In America there are two classes of travelfirst class, and with children. Robert Benchley
In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians, and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people. - Groucho Marx
In America, any boy may become president and I suppose that's just one of the risks he takes. | Adlai Stevenson
In America, anyone can become president. That's one of the risks you take. Adlai Stevenson
In Borland you are never bored!
In Case of Fire, Log off Promptly
In Dr. Johnson's famous dictionary, patriotism is defined as the last refuge of a scoundrel. With all due respect to an enlightened but inferior lexicographer, I beg to submit that it is the first. Ambrose Bierce
In English, every word can be verbed.  Would that it were so in our programming languages.
In God we trust, all others pay cash.
In God we trust; all others must pay cash. Anonymous
In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. Rita Rudner
In Riemann, Hilbert or in Banach space Let superscripts and subscripts go their ways. Our symptotes no longer out of phase, We shall encounter, counting, face to face. | Stanislaw Lem, "Cyberiad"
In The Search For Quality, There Is No Finish Line
In Vegas, I got into a long argument with the man at the roulette wheel over what I considered to be an odd number. Stephen Wright
In War: Resolution. In Defeat: Defiance. In Victory: Magnanimity. In Peace: Goodwill. Winston Churchill
In a cat's eyes, all things belong to cats
In a country well governed poverty is something to be ashamed of. In a country badly governed wealth is something to be ashamed of. Confucius
In a crisis, you will choose the worst possible course of action.
In a democracy, the individual enjoys not only the ultimate power but carries the ultimate responsibility. Norman Cousins
In a fight between you and the world, I'll back the world.
In a fight between you and the world, I'll back you.
In a fight between you and the world, back the world.
In a fit of confusion, Spock uses Scotty as toilet tissue
In a five year period we can get one superb programming language.  Only we can't control when the five year period will begin.
In a free and republican government, you cannot restrain the voice of the multitude. George Washington
In a hierarchical organization, the higher the level, the greater confusion.
In a hierarchy, every employee tends to rise to his level of incompetence.
In a number of cases dissenting opinions have in time become the law. Charles Evans Hughes
In a single day, Samson slew a thousand Philistines with the jawbone of an ass. Every day, thousands of sales are killed with the same weapon.
In a social situation, the most difficult thing to do is usually the right thing to do. Meyers Law
In a survey taken several years ago, all incoming freshman at MIT were asked if they expected to graduate in the top half of their class. Anonymous
In action, be primitive; in foresight, a strategist. Rene Char
In adversity remember to keep an even mind. Horace (8 BC)
In all affairs it's a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted. Bertrand Russell
In all forms of government the people is the true legislator. Edmund Burke
In all professions each affects a look and an exterior to appear what he wishes the world to believe that he is. Thus we may say that the whole world is made up of appearances. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
In ambition, as in love, the successful can afford to be indulgent toward their rivals. The prize our own, it is graceful to recognize the merit that vainly aspired to it. Christian Nestell Bovee
In an archery contest, when the stakes are earthenware tiles a contestant shoots with skill. When the stakes are belt buckles he becomes hesitant, and if the stakes are pure gold he becomes nervous and confused. There is no difference as to his skill. Chuang-Tzu
In an atomic war, all men will be cremated equal.
In an organization, each person rises to the level of his own incompetency | The Peter Principle
In any case = In any box ???
In any collection of data, the figure most obviously correct, beyond all need of checking, is the mistake. Finagle's Third Law
In any formula, constants (especially those obtained from handbooks) are to be treated as variables.
In any human endeavor, work seeks the lowest hierarchical level.
In any moment of decision the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing. Theodore Roosevelt
In any national struggle, the deciding factor is not who is the most competent, but who is less incompetent.
In approaching a double door, you will always go to the one door that is locked, pull when you should have pushed, and push when the sign says pull. Ehre's Double-Door Law
In baiting a mousetrap with cheese, always leave room for the mouse. Saki
In case of atomic attack, the federal ruling against prayer in schools will be temporarily canceled.
In case of doubt it is best to lean to the side of mercy. Legal Proverb
In case of emergency, break glass, scream, bleed to death.
In case of fire, yell "FIRE!"
In case of fire, yell "FIRE"
In case of injury notify superior immediately, he'll kiss it and make it better
In case of injury notify your superior immediately.  He'll kiss it and make it better.
In case of rapture, please grab the wheel.
In charity there is no excess.
In cities no one is quiet but many are lonely; in the country, people are quiet but few are lonely. Geoffrey Francis Fisher
In delay there lies no plenty. William Shakespeare
In diving to the bottom of pleasure we bring up more gravel than pearls. Honor de Balzac
In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities. Janos Arany
In every large problem is a small problem waiting to get out.
In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty. Christopher Morley
In every outthrust headland, in every curving beach, in every grain of sand there is the story of the earth. Rachel Carson
In every real man a child is hidden who wants to play.
In everything the middle course is best; all things in excess bring trouble. Plautus
In fact, I DON'T put my pants on one leg on leg at a time
In fair weather prepare for foul.
In free countries, every man is entitled to express his opinions and every other man is entitled not to listen. G. Norman Collie
In general, mankind, since the improvement of cookery, eats twice as much as nature requires. Benjamin Franklin
In giving rights to others which belong to them, we give rights to ourselves and to our country. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
In great attempts it is glorious even to fail. Cassius
In great moments life seems neither right nor wrong, but something greater, it seems inevitable. Margaret Sherwood
In great straits and when hope is small, the boldest counsels are the safest. Livy
In it's former life, my computer was a Cray...
In jealousy there is more of self-love than of love to another. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
In jealousy there is more self-love than love.
In man, the things which are not measurable are more important than those which are measurable. Alexis Carrel
In marriage, as in war, it is permitted to take every advantage of the enemy.
In matters of grave importance, style,  not sicerity is the vital thing.
In most instances, all an argument proves is that two people are present.
In music the passions enjoy themselves. Friedrich Nietzsche
In my end is my beginning.
In my heart it is spring.
In my house on the ceilings I have paintings of the rooms above...so I never have to go upstairs. Stephen Wright
In my house there's this light switch that doesn't do anything. Every so often I would flick it on and off just to check. Yesterday, I got a call from a woman in Germany. She said, 'Cut it out.' Stephen Wright
In my hut this spring, there is nothing there is everything! Sodo
In my neighborhood, a man can get further with kind words and a gun, than with kind words alone.| Al Capone
In no direction that we turn do we find ease or comfort. If we are honest and if we have the will to win we find only danger, hard work and iron resolution. Wendell L. Willkie
In order for a war to be just, three things are necessary. First, the authority of the sovereign.... Secondly, a just cause.... Thirdly ... a rightful intention. Saint Thomas Aquinas
In order to be, never try to seem.
In order to fully realize how bad a popular play can be, it is necessary to see it twice. George Bernard Shaw
In order to get a loan, you must first prove you don't need it.
In order to have an enemy, one must be somebody. One must be a force before he can be resisted by another force. A malicious enemy is better than a clumsy friend. Anne Sophie Swetchine
In order to reach the sea, a river often detours around many obstacles.
In our country they love to build beople up - and SMASH them. Florence Henderson, (Mrs Brady), on Politically Incorrect 1995
In politics if you want anything said, ask a man. If you want anything done, ask a woman., from People Magazine, 9/15/75 Margaret Thatcher
In politics stupidity is not a handicap.
In politics you can often be wrong but never in doubt.
In politics, an absurdity is not a handicap. Napoleon Bonaparte
In poverty and other misfortunes of life, true friends are a sure refuge. The young they keep out of mischief; to the old they are a comfort and aid in their weakness, and those in the prime of life they incite to noble deeds. Aristotle
In quarrelling the truth is always lost. Publilius Syrus
In questions of power, then, let no more be heard of confidence in man, but bind him down from mischief by the chains of the Constitution. Thomas Jefferson
In reviling, it is not necessary to prepare a preliminary draft. Chinese Proverb
In rivers and bad governments, the lightest things swim at top. -- Poor Richard.
In science, as in common life, we frequently see that a novelty in system, or in practice, cannot be duly appreciated till time has sobered the enthusiasm of its advocates. Maud
In scientific work, those who refuse to go beyond fact rarely get as far as fact. Thomas Huxley
In search of real placebos...
In seeking the unattainable, simplicity only gets in the way.
In simple cases, presenting one obvious right way versus one obvious wrong way, it is often wiser to choose the wrong way so as to expedite subsequent revision. Fyfe's First Law of Revision, Corollary I
In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. Ralph Waldo Emerson
In space...no one can hear you "Cha! Cha! Cha!"
In stereo where available.     .elbaliava erehw oerets nI
In studying the way, realizing it is hard; once you have realized it, preserving it is hard. When you can preserve it, putting it into practice is hard. Zen Saying
In that sweet mood when pleasant thoughts bring sad thoughts to the mind. William Wordsworth
In the Top 40, half the songs are secret messages to the teen world to drop out, turn on, and groove with the chemicals and light shows at discotheques. | Art Linkletter
In the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything, and two minus one equals nothing. Mignon McLaughlin
In the blood of the martyrs to intolerance are the seeds of unbelief. Walter Lippmann
In the computer world, every little bit helps.
In the country of the blind the one-eyed man is king. Erasmus
In the country of the blind, the one-eyed man is king.
In the dark colony of night, when I consider man's magnificent capacity for malice, madness, folly, envy, rage, and destructiveness, and I wonder whether we shall not end up as breakfast for newts and polyps, I seem to hear the muffled cries of all the words in all the books with covers closed.L Rosten
In the democracy of the dead all men at last are equal. There is neither rank nor station nor prerogative in the republic of the grave. John James Ingalls
In the end, gravity wins -- Dolly Parton.
In the faces of men and women I see God. Walt Whitman
In the field of world policy, I would dedicate this nation to the policy of the good neighbor. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
In the fight between you and the world, back the world. Franz Kafka.
In the force if Yoda's so strong, construct a sentence with words in the proper order then why can't he?
In the gain or loss of one race all the rest have equal claim. James Russell Lowell
In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is insane.
In the land of the dark, the Ship of the Sun is driven by the Grateful Dead. | Egyptian Book of the Dead
In the land of the witless, the halfwit is king.
In the last analysis sound judgment will prevail. Joseph Cannon
In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I do not shrink from this responsibilityI welcome it. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
In the long run, every program becomes rococo, and then rubble. | Alan Perlis
In the long-run every Government is the exact symbol of its People, with their wisdom and unwisdom; we have to say, Like People like Government. Thomas Carlyle
In the middle ages, people took potions for their ailments. In the 19th century they took snake oil. Citizens of today's shiny, technological age are too modern for that. They take antioxidants and extract of cactus instead. Charles Krauthammer, in Time Magazine, 1996
In the morning be first up, and in the evening last to go to bed, for they that sleep catch no fish. English Proverb
In the old world that is passing, in the new world that is coming, national efficiency has been and will be a controlling factor in national safety and welfare. Gifford Pinchot
In the ordinary business of life, industry can do anything which genius can do, and very many things which it cannot. Henry Ward Beecher
In the past, those who foolishly sought power by riding on the back of the tiger ended up inside. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
In the presence of great men, even fools hide their faults.
In the race for quality, there is no finish line.
In the stairway of life, you'd best take the elevator.
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. Anonymous In practice, however, there is. Anonymous
In these matters the only certainty is that there is nothing certain. Pliny the Elder
In these times you have to be an optimist to open your eyes in the morning. Carl Sandburg
In this age of the rule of brute force, it is almost impossible for anyone to believe that any one else could possibly reject the law of the final supremacy of brute force. Mahatma Gandhi
In this and like communities, public sentiment is everything. With public sentiment, nothing can fail; without it nothing can succeed. Abraham Lincoln
In this fortune, the concluding three words 'were left out'.
In this theater of man's life, it is reserved only for God and angels to be lookers-on. Pythagoras
In this world a man must either be anvil or hammer.
In this world it is not what we take up, but what we give up, that makes us rich. Henry Ward Beecher
In this world nothing is sure but death and taxes. Benjamin Franklin
In this world there are only two tragedies.  One is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it. - Oscar Wilde
In this world there is always danger for those who are afraid of it. George Bernard Shaw
In this world, full often, our joys are only the tender shadows which our sorrows cast. Henry Ward Beecher
In this world, truth can wait; she's used to it.
In those days he was wiser than he is nowhe used frequently to take my advice. Winston Churchill
In times of prosperity friends will be plenty, in times of adversity not one in twenty. English Proverb
In times of stress and strain, people will vote. Anonymous
In union there is strength. Aesop
In war the heroes always outnumber the soldiers ten to one. H. L. Mencken
In war there is no substitute for victory.
In wartime, truth is so precious that she should always be attended by a bodyguard of lies. Winston Churchill
In which level of metalanguage are you now speaking?
In youth we run into difficulties, in old age difficulties run into us. Josh Billings
Inagodadivida, baby!
Inane tagline found.  Abort, Retry, Swipe a better one.
Include the success of others in your dreams for your own success. Anonymous
Include this in your CONFIG.SYS File : BUGS=OFF
Include this in your CONFIG.SYS File: BUGS=OFF
Income tax is the price we pay for our jobs.
Incoming fire has the right of way. Murphy's Fourth Military Law
Incompetence knows no barriers of time or place.
Incompetence plus incompetence equals incompetence.
Inconceivable! - Vizzini
Inconsistency Some persons do first, think afterward, and then repent forever. Thomas Secker
Incontinence Hotline...Can you hold, please?
Incorrigible punster - Do not incorrige.
Incredulity Incredulity is the wisdom of the fool. Josh Billings
Incredulity robs us of many pleasures, and gives us nothing in return. James Russell Lowell
Incumbent, n.: 	Person of liveliest interest to the outcumbents. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Indecision Indecision has often given an advantage to the other fellow because he did his thinking beforehand. Maurice Switzer
Indecision is debilitating; it feeds upon itself; it is, one might almost say, habit-forming. Not only that, but it is contagious; it transmits itself to others. H. A. Hopf
Indecision is the basis of Flexibility.
Indecision is the key to flexibility.
Indeed he knows not how to know who knows not also how to un-know. Sir Richard Francis Burton
Indeed, Captain Picard, you have found him. | Spock
Independence It is not the greatness of a man's means that makes him independent, so much as the smallness of his wants. William Cobbett
Indifference error, press any key.  Or don't.  See if I care.
Indigo - the fear of purple heights.
Indirect file nested too deep.
Indiscriminate study bloats the mind.
Individualists of the world - UNITE!
Individualists unite
Individualists unite!
Individuality The worth of the state, in the long run, is the worth of the individuals composing it. John Stuart Mill
Individuality is either the mark of genius or the reverse. Mediocrity finds safety in standardization. Frederick E. Crane
Individuality is founded in feeling; and the recesses of feeling, the darker, blinder strata of character, are the only places in the world in which we catch real fact in the making. William James
Individuality is the aim of political liberty. James Fenimore Cooper
Indolence is a delightful but distressing state; we must be doing something to be happy. Action is no less necessary than thought to the instinctive tendencies of the human frame. Mahatma Gandhi
Industry If you have great talents, industry will improve them; if moderate abilities, industry will supply their deficiencies. Nothing is denied to well-directed labor; nothing is ever to be attained without it. Joshua Reynolds
Industry is the soul of business and the keystone of prosperity. Charles Dickens
Industry standard: The way IBM *WON'T* do it.
Inequality People differ in capacity, skill, health, strength; and unequal fortune is a necessary result of unequal condition. Such inequality is far from being disadvantageous either to individuals or to the community. Leo XIII
Inertia makes the world go round.
Inferiority Inferiority is what you enjoy in your best friends. Lord Chesterfield
Inferiority complex: conviction by a jury of your fears.
Infinity is one lawyer waiting for another.
Infinity means a 100% probablity of everything.
Inflation means the Buck does not stop here...
Influence Every thought which genius and piety throw into the world alters the world. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Information Center, n.: A room staffed by professional computer people whose job it is to tell you why you cannot have the information you require.
Information is held on magnetic tape by a series of punched holes.
Information is the currency of democracy. Thomas Jefferson
Information is the inverse of entropy.
Information necessitating a change of design will be conveyed to the designer after and only after the design is complete. (Often called the 'Now They Tell Us' Law) Fyfe's First Law of Revision
Ingen har nytte av et lik
Ingrate: A man who bites the hand that feeds him, and then complains of indigestion.
Ingratitude Too great haste to repay an obligation is a kind of ingratitude. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Ingratitude is treason to mankind. James Thomson
Ingres is not a necessary precursor to Egress.
Inheritance We pay for the mistakes of our ancestors, and it seems only fair that they should leave us the money to pay with. Don Marquis
Injury Slight small injuries, and they will become none at all. Thomas Fuller
Injustice If thou suffer injustice, console thyself; the true unhappiness is in doing it. Democritus
Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.| Martin Luther King, Jr.
Ink, n.: A villainous compound of tannogallate of iron, gum-arabic, and water, chiefly used to facilitate the infection of idiocy and promote intellectual crime. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Innocence They that know no evil will suspect none. Ben Jonson
Innocence is like polished armor; it adorns and defends. Robert South
Innocence most often is a good fortune and not a virtue. Anatole France
Innocence, most often, is good fortune and not a virtue.| Anatole France
Innovation is hard to schedule.| Dan Fylstra
Innuedo: An Italian suppository.
Innuendo: Italian Suppository.
Inouye shoulda been able to get in...
Inquiring minds WANT TO KNOW !
Insanity There is no insanity so devastating in man's life as utter sanity. William Allen White
Insanity destroys reason, but not wit. Nathaniel Emmons
Insanity is hereditary.  You get it from your kids.
Insanity is hereditary: you can get it from your children. Sam Levenson
Insanity is just a state of mind.
Insanity is often the logic of an accurate mind overtaxed. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Insanity is the final defense ... It's hard to get a refund when the salesman is sniffing your crotch and baying at the moon.
Insanity runs in my family; it practically gallops...
Insert New Disk for Drive C: Press ENTER when ready.
Insert Witty Tagline Here ...
Insert brain, then type.
Insert disk 5 of 4 and press any key to continue...
Insert disk with \HURTME.COM and strike Worf when ready.
Insert diskette in Drive C. Press [ENTER] to continue...
Insert inevitable trivial witicism of your choice.
Insert your card magnetic stripe down.
Inside every large problem, there is a small problem trying to get out.
Inside every large program is a small program struggling to get out.
Inside every small problem is a large problem struggling to get out.
Inside every small problem is a large problem struggling to get out. Second Law of Blissful Ignorance
Insist on yourself; never imitate. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Insomnia isn't anything to lose sleep over.
Install failed. Attempting to transfer virus to C:
Install failed. Attempting to transfer virus to C: instead.
Install failed. Attempting to transfer virus to c:
Instant Human: Just Add Coffee...
Instant gratification takes too long. Carrie Fisher
Instinct The active part of man consists of powerful instincts, some of which are gentle and continuous; others violent and short; some baser, some nobler, and all necessary. Francis W. Newman
Instinct is action taken in pursuance of a purpose, but without conscious perception of what the purpose is. Van Hartmann
Instinct is intelligence incapable of self-consciousness.
Instinct is the nose of the mind. Madame de Girardin
Instinct is untaught ability. Alexander Bain
Institute: An archaic school where football in not taught.
Instruction ends in the classroom, but education ends only with life.
Insufficient Memory: Remove the "Buffers=655,360" line.
Insufficient disk space. Delete Windows?
Insult He who puts up with insult invites injury. Proverb
Integrity has no need for rules.
Integrity is praised, and starves.
Integrity of Heart; Skill of Hand
Intel: littendian, segmentated, trimodal...fun
Intellect annuls fate. So far as a man thinks, he is free. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Intellectually I know that America is no better than any other country; emotionally I know she is better than every country. Sinclair Lewis
Intelligent Terminal - one that does understand what you're trying to do, but is clever enough to screw up in an interesting way.
Intense feeling too often obscures the truth. Harry Truman
Interchangeable parts ... Don't.
Interchangeable parts won't.
Interchangeable parts won't. Laws of Assembly, II
Internal combustion engines are the dinosaurs' revenge
Internal consistency is valued more than efficient service.
International arbitration may be defined as the substitution of many burning questions for a smouldering one. Ambrose Bierce
Interpretation is the revenge of the intellectual upon art. Susan Sontag
Interpreter, n.: One who enables two persons of different languages to understand each other by repeating to each what it would have been to the interpreter's advantage for the other to have said. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Interstellar Matter is a Gas
Into each life some rain must fall. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Into love and out again, Thus I went and thus I go. Spare your voice, and hold your pen: Well and bitterly I know All the songs were ever sung, All the words were ever said; Could it be, when I was young, Someone dropped me on my head? | THEORY -- Dorothy Parker
Intolerance Intolerance is a form of egotism, and to condemn egotism intolerantly is to share it. George Santayana
Intolerance has been the curse of every age and state. Samuel Davies
Intriguing. I did not know humans were so capable. | Data
Intuition is reason in a hurry.
Invention The march of invention has clothed mankind with powers of which a century ago the boldest imagination could not have dreamt. Henry George
Invention is the talent of youth, as judgment is of age. Jonathan Swift
Invest in physics - own a piece of Dirac!
Invisible Systems, Inc. If you don't see it, we made it.
Iraq won the toss... and elected to receive.
Iraq's national bird?, "DUCK"
Iraqi Bingo  B-52..F-16..A-10.. F-18..F-117..B-2
Iraqi Bingo: B-52... F-16... M-1... F-18... F-117...
Iraqi Bingo: B-52...F-16...A-10...F-18...F-117...B-2...
Iraqi rifle for sale.  Never fired.  Dropped once.
Iraqi rifle for sale. Never fired. Dropped once.
IrepeatmyselfwhenunderstressIrepeatmyselfwhenunderstressI
Iron Law of Distribution: Them that has, gets.
Iron rusts from disuse, stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigors of the mind. George Allen
Iron sharpens iron; scholar, the scholar.
Irony Irony is the gaity of reflection and the joy of wisdom. Anatole France
Irony is an insult conveyed in the form of a compliment. Edwin Percy Whipple
Irony is jesting behind hidden gravity. John Weiss
Irony: Giving father a billfold for Christmas.
Is Al the hologram really Al Bundy in disguise?
Is FIDO a dog?
Is HST faster than the Concord?
Is OS/2 only half an operating system ?
Is a castrated pig disgruntled?
Is a computer language with goto's totally wirth-less?
Is good Data, Gordi's best friend?
Is it Friday yet?
Is it OK to panic now ?
Is it a game of chance?  Not the way I play it.
Is it friday yet?
Is it magic.... or is it SessionManager?
Is it ok to panic now ?
Is it ok to use my AM radio after NOON?
Is it possible that software is not like anything else, that it is meant to be discarded: that the whole point is to always see it as a soap bubble?
Is it possible to feel gruntled.
Is it progress if a cannibal uses a knife and fork?
Is it progress if a cannibal uses a knife and fork? Stanislaw Lem
Is it really true that blondes have more fun ?
Is it still paranoia if they ARE ALL out to get me???
Is it time for lunch yet?
Is it weird in here, or is it just me?
Is knowledge knowable, and how do we know?
Is not absence death to those who love? Alexander Pope
Is not marriage an open question, when it is alleged, from the beginning of the world, that such as are in the institution wish to get out, and such as are out wish to get in? | Ralph Emerson
Is piece when the loin lies down with the limb?
Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?
Is sex in a cornfield "Porn on the cob"?
Is that Pee Wee Herman in the Barney suit?
Is that a flying saucer or a pie in the sky?
Is that a hard drive or are you just happy to see me?
Is that a tic-tac in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?
Is that a tic-tac in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?|Pick up line
Is that seat saved? No, but we're praying for it.
Is the "Truth" so bizarre it is unbelievable?
Is the dingleberry still fashionable?
Is the glass half empty, half full, or twice as large as it needs to I still miss my ex-wife, but my aim is getting better. Anonymous
Is there a Lemon Law for Presidents too?
Is there a lawyer in the house?  <BLAM!>  Is there another?
Is there any truth to the rumor that everything is really okay?
Is there death after life ?
Is there life before coffee?
Is there life before coffee?|Bumper sticker
Is there not some chosen curse, some hidden thunder in the stores of heaven, red with uncommon wrath, to blast the man who owes his greatness to his country's ruin! Joseph Addison
Is this Fahrvergngen?
Is this a machine?  I don't talk to machines  [Click]
Is this a machine?  I don't talk to machines!  [Click]
Is this bullshit or fertilizer?
Is this really happening?
Is this the right room for an argument?
Is this yours? Your dog left it on my lawn ...
Is this yours? Your dog left it on my lawn.
Is virus a 'micro' organism ?
Is wetter REALLY better?
Is your job running?  You'd better go catch it
Isn't 'Dumb Blonde' a peroxymoron?
Isn't it strange that the same people that laugh at gypsy fortune tellers take economists seriously?
Isn't nature wonderful?
Isn't there a statute of limitations on stupidity?
Isn't this the OFF-TOPIC conference?
It [the war in Vietnam] poisons everything. It has disrupted the economy, envenomed our politics, hurt the alliance, divided our people, and now it is interfering with this critical question of the arms race. James Reston
It ain't easy being easy.
It ain't necessarily so. Gershwin's Law
It ain't no use putting up your umbrella till it rains. Alice Caldwell Rice
It ain't the  meat, its the motion. | Jennifer
It ain't the size of the pencil, but how well you write
It all looks the same if you're not the lead dog.
It always happens, but we never expect the unexpected.
It always takes longer than you expect, even when you take Hofstadter's Law into account. Hofstadter's Law
It becomes no man to nurse despair, but, in the teeth of clenched antagonisms, to follow up the worthiest till he die. Alfred, Lord Tennyson
It behooves us to avoid archaisms.
It behoves every man who values liberty of conscience for himself, to resist invasions of it in the case of others: or their case may, by change of circumstances, become his own. Thomas Jefferson
It can't be full...I STILL HAVE SUBDIRECTORIES
It chills my blood to hear the blest Supreme Rudely appealed to on each trifling theme. William Cowper
It costs more to revenge injuries that to bear them.
It could be worse--it might be raining.
It depends on which end he tries to light.
It depends on which end he tries to light...
It did what?  Well, it's not supposed to do that.
It does not take much strength to do things, but it requires great strength to decide on what to do. Elbert Hubbard
It doesn't do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations.
It doesn't matter what temperature the room is, it's always room temperature. Stephen Wright
It doesn't matter what they preach, Of high or low degree; The old Hell of the Bible Is hell enough for me. Frank L. Stanton
It doesn't matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was. Anne Sexton
It doesn't stand up to huge intellectual scrutiny. Andrew Lloyd Webber, Theatrical Producer, on the huge success of his Phantom of the Opera, 1995
It doesn't work, but I'm working on it.
It doesn't work, but it looks pretty.
It gives me great pleasure indeed to see the stubbornness of an incorrigible nonconformist warmly acclaimed. Albert Einstein
It goes far toward making a man faithful to let him understand that you think him so; and he that does but suspect I will deceive him gives me a sort of right to do it. Seneca
It has been discovered: research causes cancer in rats.
It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues. Abraham Lincoln
It has been my observation and experience, and that of my family, that nothing human works out well. Don Marquis
It has just been discovered that research causes cancer in rats.
It has long been an axiom of mine that the little things are infinitely the more important. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
It has many other uses as well.  Allow me. | Worf
It has no fear. Yasser Sierawan, chess grand master, describing one competitive advantage of IBM's Deep Blue chess computer, 1996
It has taken me years of struggle, hard work and research to learn to make one simple gesture, and I know enough about the art of writing to realize that it would take as many years of concentrated effort to write one simple, beautiful sentence. Isadora Duncan
It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value.
It is Fortune, not Wisdom, that rules man's life.
It is Fortune, not wisdom that rules man's life.
It is Fortune, not wisdom that rules our lives.
It is a bad well into which one must put water.
It is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data. Arthur Conan Doyle, english author
It is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data. Insensibly one begins to twist facts to suit theories, instead of theories to suit facts. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
It is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data., Arthur Conan Doyle
It is a common phenomenon that just the prettiest girls find it so difficult to get a man. Heinrich Heine
It is a cursed evil to any man to become as absorbed in any subject as I am in mine. Charles Darwin
It is a damn poor mind indeed which can't think of at least two ways to spell any word. Andrew Jackson
It is a fitting irony that under Richard Nixon, 'launder' became a dirty word. William Zinsser
It is a glorious thing to be indifferent to suffering, but only to one's own suffering. Robert Lynd
It is a good day to die. - Worf, son of Mog
It is a madness to make fortune the mistress of events, because in herself she is nothing, but is ruled by prudence. John Dryden
It is a mark of many famous people that they cannot part with their finest hour. Lillian Hellman
It is a miserable state of mind to have few things to desire, and many things to fear. Francis Bacon
It is a mistake that there is no bath that will cure people's manners, but drowning would help. Mark Twain
It is a mistake to look too far ahead. Only one link in the chain of destiny can be handled at a time. Sir Winston Churchill
It is a poor judge who cannot award a prize.
It is a rather pleasant experience to be alone in a bank at night.
It is a shameful thing to be weary of inquiry when what we search for is excellent. Cicero
It is a statistical fact that the wicked work harder to reach hell than the righteous do to enter heaven. Josh Billings
It is a wearisome disease to preserve health by too strict a regimen. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
It is a wise father that knows his own child.
It is after you have lost your teeth that you can afford to buy steaks. Pierre August Renoir
It is against the grain of modern education to teach children to program.  What fun is there in making plans, acquiring discipline in organizing thoughts, devoting attention to detail, and learning to be self-critical? | Alan Perlis
It is always better to sacrifice your opponent's men
It is always during a passing state of mind that we make lasting resolutions. Marcel Proust
It is always easier to believe than to deny. Our minds are naturally affirmative. John Burroughs
It is always much harder to find a job than to keep one.
It is always preferable to visit home with a friend.  Your parents will not be pleased with this plan, because they want you all to themselves and because in the presence of your friend, they will have to act like mature human beings ... | Playboy, January 1983
It is always sound business to take any obtainable net gain, at any cost and at any risk to the rest of the community. Thorstein Veblen
It is always the partner's fault.
It is amusing that a virtue is made of the vice of chastity; and it's a pretty odd sort of chastity at that, which leads men straight into the sin of Onan, and girls to the waning of their color. | Voltaire
It is an interesting question how far men would retain their relative rank if they were divested of their clothes. Henry David Thoreau
It is an old and ironic habit of human beings to run faster when we have lost our way. Rollo May
It is annoying to be honest to no purpose.
It is as expedient that a wicked man be punished as that a sick man be cured by a physician; for all chastisement is a kind of medicine. Plato
It is as hard to satirize well a man of distinguished vices, as to praise well a man of distinguished virtues. Jonathan Swift
It is bad luck to be superstitious.
It is base to filch a purse, daring to embezzle a million, but it is great beyond measure to steal a crown. The sin lessens as the guilt increases. Johann von Schiller
It is best to love wisely, no doubt; but to love foolishly is better than not to be able to love at all. William Makepeace Thackeray
It is best to tell the truth unless you are an exeptionally good liar.
It is better that ten guilty persons escape than that one innocent suffer. William Blackstone
It is better to be a young June-bug than an old bird of paradise. Mark Twain
It is better to be born lucky than rich.
It is better to be brief than boring.
It is better to be deceived by a friend, than to suspect him.
It is better to be faithful than famous. Theodore Roosevelt
It is better to be feared than loved.
It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not. Andr Gide
It is better to be hated than to be ignored.
It is better to be miserable and rich than miserable and poor.
It is better to be safe than sorry. American Proverb
It is better to be silent, and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt. Silvan Engel
It is better to be wise than to be smart.
It is better to copulate than never.
It is better to create than to be learned, creating is the true essence of life. Barthold Georg Niebuhr
It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not deserve them. Mark Twain
It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees. Delores Ibarruri
It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation. Herman Melville
It is better to fail in originality than to succeed in imitation. Herman Melville, american author
It is better to fall among crows than flatterers; for those devour only the deadthese the living. Antisthenes
It is better to have flunked your Wasserman test than never to have loved at all.
It is better to have loafed and lost, than never to have loafed at all. James Thurber
It is better to have loved a short woman than never to have loved a tall.
It is better to have loved and lost -- much better.
It is better to have loved and lost than just to have lost.
It is better to have men ask why you have no statue, than why you have one.
It is better to kiss an avocado than to get in a fight with an aardvark
It is better to kiss an avocado than to get in a fight with an aardvark.
It is better to know nothing than to know what ain't so.
It is better to know useless things than nothing?
It is better to know useless things than to know nothing.
It is better to limp all the way to heaven, than not to get there at all.| William Sunday
It is better to rise from life as from a banquetneither thirsty nor drunken. Aristotle
It is better to suffer wrong than to do it, and happier to be sometimes cheated than not to trust. Samuel Johnson
It is better to suffer wrong than to do it.
It is better to vote for someone you like and have them not elected than to vote for someone you dislike and have them elected.
It is better to wear out than to rust out.
It is better to wear out than to rust out. Richard Cumberland
It is broke.  It will not work.  It does not go.
It is but a step from companionship to slavery when one associates with vice. Hosea Ballou
It is but a truism that labor is most productive where its wages are largest. Poorly paid labor is inefficient labor, the world over. Henry George
It is by acts and not by ideas that people live. Anatole France
It is by presence of mind in untried emergencies that the native metal of man is tested. James Russell Lowell
It is by the fortune of God that, in this country, we have three benefits: freedom of speech, freedom of thought, and the wisdom never to use either. | Mark Twain
It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either. Mark Twain
It is commonly not your practice to make up your mind until the very last minute.
It is dainty to be sick, if you have leisure and convenience for it. Ralph Waldo Emerson
It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong. Voltaire
It is dangerous to confuse children with angels.
It is defeat that turns bone to flint; it is defeat that turns gristle to muscle; it is defeat that makes men invincible. Henry Ward Beecher
It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends upon his not understanding it. Upton Sinclair
It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper. Rod Serling
It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper. | R. Serling
It is difficult to prophesy, especially about the future.
It is difficult to say what is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow. Robert H. Goddard
It is difficult to soar with eagles when you work with turkeys.
It is discouraging to try and penetrate a mind like yours. You ought to get it out and dance on it. That would take some of the rigidity out of it. Mark Twain
It is double pleasure to deceive the deceiver.
It is double the pleasure to deceive the deceiver. Jean de la Fontaine
It is easier to admire hard work if you don't do it.
It is easier to catch flies with honey than with vinegar.
It is easier to change the specification to fit the program than vice versa.
It is easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them.
It is easier to forgive an enemy than a friend. Madame Dorothe Deluzy
It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
It is easier to lead men to combat, stirring up their passion, than to restrain them and direct them toward the patient labours of peace. Andre Gide
It is easier to love humanity as a whole than to love one's neighbor. Eric Hoffer
It is easier to love humanity than to love one's neighbor. Eric Hoffer
It is easier to manufacture seven facts out of whole cloth than one emotion. Mark Twain
It is easier to perceive error than to find truth, for the former lies on the surface and is easily seen, while the latter lies in the depth, where few are willing to search for it. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
It is easier to pull down than to build up. Latin Proverb
It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.
It is easier to run down a hill than up one.
It is easier to stay out than get out. Mark Twain
It is easier to write an incorrect program than to understand a correct one.
It is easier to write an incorrect program than understand a correct one.
It is easy for a somebody to be modest, but it is difficult to be modest when one is a nobody. Jules Renard
It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude. Ralph Waldo Emerson
It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinions; it is easy in solitude to live after your own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude. Ralph Waldo Emerson
It is easy to be tolerant of the principles of other people if you have none of your own. Herbert Samuel
It is easy to be wise after the event.
It is easy to build a philosophyit doesn't have to run. Charles F. Kettering
It is easy to flatter; it is harder to praise. Jean Paul Richter
It is easy to propose impossible remedies.
It is easy when we are in prosperity to give advice to the afflicted. Aeschylus
It is especially important to encourage unorthodox thinking when the situation is critical: At such moments every new word and fresh thought is more precious than gold. Indeed, people must not be deprived of the right to think their own thoughts. Boris Yeltsin
It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has decended from man. H.L. Mencken
It is extraordinary how potent cheap music is. Noel Coward
It is far better to be deceived than to be undeceived by those we love.
It is far safer to be feared than loved.   | Machiavelli
It is fatal to enter any war without the will to win it. Douglas MacArthur
It is fatal to live too long.
It is foolish and wrong to mourn the men who died. Rather we should thank God that such men lived. George S. Patton, Jr.
It is foolish to lay out money for the purchase of repentance. Benjamin Franklin
It is foolish to tear one's hair in grief, as though sorrow would be made less by baldness. Cicero
It is forbidden to kill; therefore all murderers are punished unless they kill in large numbers and to the sound of trumpets. Voltaire
It is fortune, not wisdom that rules man's life.
It is fraud to accept what you cannot repay. Publilius Syrus
It is from weakness that people reach for dictators and concentrated government power. Only the strong can be free. And only the productive can be strong. Wendell L. Willkie
It is generally agreed that "Hello" is an appropriate greeting because if you entered a room and said "Goodbye," it could confuse a lot of people. | Dolph Sharp, "I'm O.K., You're Not So Hot"
It is hard to believe that a man is telling the truth when you know that you would lie if you were in his place. H. L. Mencken
It is hard to believe that even his friends like him.
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. In this life we get nothing save by effort. Theodore Roosevelt
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
It is hard to get ivory in Africa, but in Alabama the Tuscaloosa.
It is hard to say whether the doctors of law or divinity have made the greater advances in the lucrative business of mystery. Edmund Burke
It is hereditary in my family to have no children.
It is human nature to think wisely and act foolishly. Anatole France
It is impossible for a man to be cheated by anyone but himself. Ralph Waldo Emerson
It is impossible to believe that the same God who permitted His own son to die a bachelor regards celibacy as an actual sin. H. L. Mencken
It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do
It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do.
It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do. Jerome K. Jerome
It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious. Murphy's Second Corollary
It is impossible to predict the time and progress of revolution. It is governed by its own more or less mysterious laws. Lenin, Vladimir
It is impossible to travel faster than light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off. | Woody Allen
It is impossible to underrate human intelligencebeginning with one's own. Henry Brooks Adams
It is impossible to win the great prizes of life without running risks, and the greatest of all prizes are those connected with the home. Theodore Roosevelt
It is in the American tradition to stand up for one's rightseven if the new way to stand up for one's rights is to sit down. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
It is incumbent on us to avoid archaisms.
It is later than you think.
It is less important to redistribute wealth than it is to redistribute opportunity. Arthur H. Vandenberg
It is man that makes truth great, not truth that makes man great. Confucius
It is meaningless to speak of domesticating a child.
It is morally wrong to allow a sucker to keep his money.
It is morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money.
It is more difficult, and it calls for higher energies of soul, to live a martyr than to die one. Horace Mann
It is more easy to be wise for others than for ourselves. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
It is more noble by silence to avoid an injury than by argument to overcome it. Francis Beaumont
It is more shameful to distrust one's friends than to be deceived by them.
It is more than probable that the average man could, with no injury to his health, increase his efficiency fifty percent. Walter Scott
It is much better to have your gold in the hand than in the heart. Thomas Fuller
It is much easier to be critical than to be correct
It is much easier to be critical than to be correct. Benjamin Disraeli
It is much easier to repent of sins that we have committed than to repent of those that we intend to commit. Josh Billings
It is much easier to suggest solutions when you know nothing about the problem.
It is much easier to suppress a first desire than to satisfy those that follow. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
It is much harder to find a job than to keep one.
It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what others say in a whole book. Friedrich Nietzsche, (1844,1900)
It is my ambition to say in ten sentences; what others s in a whole book. Friededderich Nietzsche
It is my principle that the will of the majority should always prevail. Thomas Jefferson
It is necessary to the happiness of a man that he be mentally faithful to himself. Thomas Paine
It is never safe to look into the future with eyes of fear. Edward H. Harriman
It is never too late to learn.
It is no every couple that is a pair.
It is not clear that intelligence has any long-term survival value. -Stephen Hawking Interest Interest makes some people blind, and others quick-sighted. Francis Beaumont
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere. Agnes Repplier
It is not enough to aim.; you must hit. Italian Proverb
It is not enough to succeed.  Others must fail.
It is not enough to succeed.  Others must fail. | Gore Vidal
It is not every question that deserves an answer.
It is not from nature, but from education and habits, that our wants are chiefly derived. Henry Fielding
It is not good to be too free. It is not good to have everything one wants. Blaise Pascal
It is not he who gives abuse that affronts, but the view that we take of it as insulting; so that when one provokes you it is your own opinion which is provoking. Epictetus
It is not necessary to fall into a well to know its depth.
It is not necesssary to understand things in order to argue about them. Caron de Beaumarchais
It is not only old and early impressions that deceive us; the charms of novelty have the same power. Blaise Pascal
It is not possible for civilization to flow backwards while there is youth in the world. Helen Keller
It is not the employer who pays wages - he only handles the money. It is the product that pays wages. Henry Ford
It is not the insurrections of ignorance that are dangerous, but the revolts of the intelligence. James Russell Lowell
It is not true that life is one damn thing after another -- it's one damn thing over and over. | Edna St. Vincent Millay
It is not true that life is one damn thing after another...It's one damn thing over and over. Edna St. Vincent Millay
It is not whether you really cry. It's whether the audience thinks you are crying. Ingrid Bergman
It is not work that kills but worry.
It is not work that kills men; it is worry. Worry is rust upon the blade. Henry Ward Beecher
It is now 10 p.m.  Do you know where Henry Kissinger is? | Elizabeth Carpenter
It is now pitch dark.  If you proceed, you will likely fall into a pit.
It is now politically correct to criticize political correctness
It is of no small commendation to manage a little well. To live well in abundance is the praise of the estate, not of the person. I will study more how to give a good account of my little, than how to make it more. Joseph Hall
It is often better not to see an insult than to avenge it.
It is often better not to see an insult than to avenge it. Seneca
It is one of the greatest economic errors to put any limitation upon production.... We have not the power to produce more than there is a potential to consume. Louis D. Brandeis
It is one of the happy incidents of the federal system that a single courageous State may, if its citizens choose, serve as a laboratory; and try novel social and economic experiments without risk to the rest of the country. Louis D. Brandeis
It is one of the superstitions of the human mind to have imagined that virginity could be a virtue. | Voltaire
It is only by not paying one's bills that one can hope to live in the memory of the commercial classes. Oscar Wilde
It is only from the belief of the goodness and wisdom of a supreme being, that our calamities can be borne in the manner which becomes a man. Henry Mackenzie
It is only persons of firmness that can have real gentleness. Those who appear gentle are, in general, only a weak character, which easily changes into asperity. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
It is only shallow people who do not judge by appearances.
It is only the intellectually lost who ever argue. Oscar Wilde
It is only through labor and painful effort, by grim energy and resolute courage, that we move on to better things. Theodore Roosevelt
It is only too easy to make suggestions and later try to escape the consequences of what we say. Ja`awaharlal Nehru
It is only with the heart that one can see rightly,; what is essential is invisible to the eye.
It is organized violence on top which creates individual violence at the bottom. It is the accumulated indignation against organized wrong, organized crime, organized injustice, which drives the political offender to act. Emma Goldman
It is our own vanity that makes the vanity of others intolerable to us. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
It is part of the American character to consider nothing as desperate, to surmount every difficulty by resolution and contrivance. Thomas Jefferson
It is preoccupation with possession, more than anything else, that prevents men from living freely and nobly. Bertrand Russell
It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed. Kin Hubbard
It is quite untrue that British people don't appreciate music. They may not understand it but they absolutely love the noise it makes. Sir Thomas Beecham
It is rarely that you see an American writer who is not hopelessly sane. Margaret Anderson
It is reasonable to have perfection in our eye that we may always advance toward it, though we know it can never be reached. Samuel Johnson
It is respectable to have no illusions, and safe, and profitable and dull. Joseph Conrad
It is right to be contented with what we have, never with what we are. James Mackintosh
It is said that our anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strength. Charles H. Spurgeon
It is said that the lonely eagle flies to the mountain peaks while the lowly ant crawls the ground, but cannot the soul of the ant soar as high as the eagle?
It is sheer madness to live in want in order to be wealthy when you die. Juvenal
It is surprising what a man can do when he has to, and how little most men will do when they don't have to. Walter Linn
It is sweet to let the mind unbend on occasion.
It is the amends of a short and troublesome life, that doing good and suffering ill entitles man to a longer and better. William Penn
It is the business of little minds to shrink. | Carl Sandburg
It is the business of the future to be dangerous. | Hawkwind
It is the cause and not merely the death that makes the martyr. Napoleon Bonaparte
It is the difference of opinion that makes horse races. Mark Twain
It is the dim haze of mystery that adds enchantment to pursuit. Antoine Rivarol
It is the experience of living that is important, not searching for meaning. We bring meaning by how we love the world. Bernie S. Siegel, MD
It is the first step that is difficult.
It is the function of art to renew our perception. What we are familiar with we cease to see. The writer shakes up the familiar scene, and, as if by magic, we see a new meaning in it. Anaias Nin
It is the great north wind that made the Vikings. Scandanavian Proverb
It is the habit of every aggressor nation to claim that it is acting on the defensive. Jawaharlal Nehru
It is the height of absurdity to sow little but weeds in the first half of one's lifetime and expect to harvest a valuable crop in the second half. Percy Johnston
It is the little bits of things that fret and worry us; we can dodge an elephant, but we can't dodge a fly. Josh Billings
It is the mark of an inexperienced man not to believe in luck. Joseph Conrad
It is the neglect of timely repair that makes rebuilding necessary. Richard Whately
It is the part of a good shepherd to shear his flock, not to skin it. Latin Proverb
It is the passion that is in a kiss that gives to it its sweetness; it is the affection in a kiss that sanctifies it. Christian Nestell Bovee
It is the privilege of genius that to it life never grows commonplace as to the rest of us. James Russell Lowell
It is the privilege of posterity to set matters right between those antagonists who, by their rivalry for greatness, divided a whole age. Joseph Addison
It is the purpose that makes strong the vow; But vows to every purpose must not hold. William Shakespeare
It is the quality of our work which will please God and not the quantity. Mahatma Gandhi
It is the rooted instinct in men to admire what is better and more beautiful than themselves. James Russell Lowell
It is the spirit and not the form of law that keeps justice alive. Earl Warren
It is the still small voice that the soul heeds; not the deafening blasts of doom. William D. Howells
It is the test of a good religion whether you can joke about it. Gilbert K. Chesterton
It is the wise bird that builds its nest in a tree.
It is the wise bird who builds his nest in a tree.
It is unwise to be too sure of one's own wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err. Mahatma Gandhi
It is unwise to trust those you do not know well.
It is usually impractical to worry beforehand about interferences - if you have none, someone will make one for you. Fyfe's Third Law of Revision, Corollary I
It is very east to forgive others their mistakes; it takes more grit and gumption to forgive them for having witnessed your own. Jessamyn West
It is very vulgar to talk like a dentist when one isn't a dentist. It produced a false impression. Oscar Wilde, from The Importance of Being Earnest
It is well that war is so terriblewe shouldn't grow too fond of it. Robert E. Lee
It is what we can make of the mess we have made of things
It is what you do from now on that will either move our civilization forward a few tiny steps, or else...begin to march us steadily backward. Patrick Stewart, actor and star fleet captain, at Pomona College Graduation, 1995
It is when I struggle to be brief that I become obscure.
It is when you take for yourself that you truly take.
It is wise to learn; it is God-like to create. John Saxe
It is with disease of the mind, as with those of the body; we are half dead before we understand our disorder, and half cured when we do. Charles Caleb Colton
It is with our judgments as with our watches: no two go just alike, yet each believes his own. Alexander Pope
It is with pious fraud as with a bad action; it begets a calamitous necessity of going on. Thomas Paine
It is with words as with sunbeamsthe more they are condensed, the deeper they burn. Robert Southey
It is wonderful what strength of purpose and boldness and energy of will are roused by the assurance that we are doing our duty. Walter Scott
It is your concern when your neighbor's wall is on fire.
It is, after all,  only a moment in the infinity of time.
It is...It is...<sniff>...It is green.  Data
It isn't necessary to be rich and famous to be happy. It's only necessary to be rich. Alan Alda
It isn't pollution that's harming the environment.  It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.| Vice President Dan Quayle
It isn't really mine 'til I've modified it
It isn't really mine until I've modified it.
It isn't the incompetent who destroy an organization, It is those who have achieved something and want to rest upon their achievements who are forever clogging things up. Charles Sorenson
It isn't the whistle that moves the train.
It just goes to show you, its always something.
It looked like the fall of the Roman Empire. Ted Soqui, photographer, describing parts of LA after the Northridge Earthquake, 1994
It looks like blind screaming hedonism won out.
It looks like the sands of time could be running out for our lads.
It makes a difference whose ox is gored.|  Martin Luther
It makes no difference who you vote for, the two parties are really one party representing four percent of the people. Gore Vidal
It makes no more sense to postulate a special brain-soul in order to account for the activities of the brain than to postulate a special stomach-soul in order to explain the functioning of the stomach or a special lung-soul to explain the phenomenon o Corliss Lamont (The Philosophy of Humanism, 1949)
It matters not how many fish are in the sea... if you don't have any bait on your hook. Dial West
It matters not how strait the gate, How charged with punishments the scroll; I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul. W. E. Henley
It may be that perpetual peace can only be brought about by perpetual war.
It may be that without a vision men shall die. It is no less true that, without hard practical sense, they shall also die. Without Jefferson the new nation might have lost its soul. Without Hamilton it would assuredly have been killed in body. James Truslow Adams
It may be that your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
It may be that your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others. Anonymous
It may just be because I get homesick, but I have concluded Washington's cherry blossoms are just plain overrated. Newt Gingrich, US Congressman and House Speaker, 1990
It must be of the spirit if we are to save the flesh. Douglas MacArthur
It never occurs to fools that merit and good fortune are closely united. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
It never troubles the wolf how many the sheep may be. Vergil
It now costs more to amuse a child than it once did to educate his father.
It often happens that those of whom we speak least on earth are best known in heaven. Nicolas Caussin
It only works when you're not looking.
It pays to be obvious, especially if you have a reputation for subtlety.
It really bothers me when people cut me o...
It requires more courage to suffer than to die. Napoleon Bonaparte
It runs in the blood like wooden legs.
It said "Insert disk #3", but only two will fit!
It said "insert disk #3" - but onty two will fit...
It seems like once people grow up, they have no idea what's cool. Sam Waterson, Calvin and Hobbes comic strip, 1994
It seems like the less a statesman amounts to, the more he loves the flag.
It seems like the less a statesman amounts to, the more he/she loves the flag.
It seems that nothing ever gets to going good till there's a few resignations. Kin Hubbard
It seems to make an auto driver mad if he misses you.
It seems to me that those songs that have been any good, I have nothing much to do with the writing of them. The words have just crawled down my sleeve and come out on the page. Joan Baez
It shows "us vs. them," and I'm on the "us" side. | Vice President Dan Quayle
It stands to the everlasting credit of science that by acting on the human mind it has overcome man's insecurity before himself and before nature. Albert Einstein
It sure is a damn ugly nothing - Geordi
It takes 11 cockroaches to mail a letter.
It takes 4 years to get a PhD and 40 years to get over it.
It takes a clever man to turn cynic and a wise man to be clever enough not to. Fannie Hurst
It takes a long time to become young. Pablo Picasso
It takes a mature person to be really young.
It takes a modem to run a baudy house.
It takes a wise man to recognize a wise man. |  Xenophanes
It takes all Types(tyles) and I want them ALL!
It takes all sorts of people to make the underworld. Don Marquis
It takes all sorts to make a world. English Proverb
It takes an endless amount of history to make even a little tradition. Henry James
It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan.
It takes both a weapon, and two people, to commit a murder.
It takes less time to do a thing right than it does to explain why you did it wrong. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
It takes less time to do a thing right, than it does to explain why you did it wrong. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
It takes nearly as much ability to know how to profit by good advice as to know how to act for one's self. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
It takes two to make a bargain.
It takes two to make a marriage a success and only one to make it a failure. Herbert Samuel
It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. Mark Twain
It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. Mark Twain
It was a book to kill time for those who liked it better dead.
It was a brave person who first ate an oyster.
It was a great shot, if it had gone in the net it would have been a goal.
It was all so different before everything changed.
It was certainly a record for polyester. Auctioneer, after John Travolta's leisure suit from Saturday Night Fever brought in $145,000 at auction, 1995
It was not my intention to amuse you. Spock STV
It was not so very long ago that people thought that semiconductors were part-time orchestra leaders and microchips were cery, very small snack foods. Geraldine Ferraro
It was pride that changed angels into devils; it is humility that makes men as angels. Saint Augustine
It was so cold, I almost got married.
It was such a lovely day, I thought it was a pity to get up.
It was through the feeling of wonder that men now and at first began to philosophize. Aristotle
It wasn't broken..until I started playing with it!
It were not best that we should all think alike; it is the difference
It will be advantageous to cross the great stream ... the Dragon is on the wing in the Sky ... the Great Man rouses himself to his Work.
It will be very generally found that those who will sneer habitually at human nature, and affect to despise it, are among its worst and least pleasant samples. Charles Dickens
It will free man from his remaining chains, the chains of gravity which still tie him to this planet. It will open to him the gates of heaven. Wernher Von Braun
It will generally be found that men who are constantly lamenting their ill luck are only reaping the consequences of their own neglect, mismanagement, and improvidence, or want of application. Samuel Smiles
It will yet be the proud boast of women that they never contributed a line to the Bible. George W. Foote
It won't work.
It works better if you plug it in *AND THEN* turn it on.
It works better if you plug it in where it should be.
It works better if you plug it in.
It works better if you plug it in. Sattinger's Law
It works better when you turn the brightness up.
It'a not the bullet that kills you, It's the hole.
It'll be just like Beggars Canyon back home.
It's  3:40 pm, Do you know where your child is
It's 11:56 pm. Do you know where your modem is?
It's ALWAYS dark if you never open your eyes.
It's Capain Flintstone... He's Fred, Jim!
It's Ensign Pillsbury He's BREAD, Jim
It's GodI'd have known Him by Blake's picture anywhere. Robert Frost
It's MY idea 'cause I stole it first !
It's MY idea because I stole it first !
It's STILL just a DUMB machine !
It's Tekonojikly better!
It's a GREAT DAY when I learn something new!
It's a Tough Job! ..... So I'd Rather YOU do it.
It's a damn poor mind that can only think of one way to spell a word. | Andrew Jackson
It's a dirty job, but someone's gotta pawn it off on someone else.
It's a fine line between fishing & standing still
It's a fine line between fishing & standing still.
It's a game of two halves.
It's a knockout tournament and anything can happen.
It's a long time since I drank champagne. Anton Checkov, last words
It's a long time since I've enjoyed myself so much.
It's a poor cook who cannot lick his own fingers.
It's a poor sort of memory that only works backwards.
It's a poor workman who blames his tools.
It's a recession when your neighbor loses his job; it's a depression when you lose your own. Harry S Truman
It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it. Stephen Wright
It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it.
It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it. Anonymous
It's a terrible thing to waste one's mind -Dan Quayle
It's a tragedy that no man become like their mothers.
It's all about doing the business where it matters in the 6 yard box.
It's all in the mind, so you might as well be happy.
It's all in the mind, ya know.
It's all right letting your self go as long as you can get yourself back.
It's all that the young can do for the old, to shock them and keep them up to date. George Bernard Shaw
It's alright - he's from Barcelona.
It's always darkest before you step on the cat.
It's always darkest just before you step on the cat.
It's always sunny there this time of the year.| Famous last words
It's always your partner's fault.
It's an ill wind that gathers no moss.
It's an old adage that the way to be safe is never to be secure ... Each one of us requires the spur of insecurity to force us to do our best. Harold W. Dodds
It's as bad as you think and they are out to get you.
It's as bad as you think and they are out to get you.|Bumper sticker
It's as easy as 3.14159265358979323846....
It's as startling as Chelsea Clinton with a Mohawk. Time Magazine review of music by singer Alanis Morisette, 1996
It's bad luck to be superstitious.
It's been a business doing pleasure with you.
It's been lovely, but I have to scream now.
It's better the world wonder why you *AREN'T* President.
It's better to be a lion for a day than a sheep all your life. Sister Elizabeth Kenny
It's better to burn out than to fade away.
It's better to get mugged than to live a life of fear. | Freeman Dyson
It's better to have a gun and not need it than to need a gun and not have it.
It's better to retire too soon than too late.
It's certainly not over yet with five minutes left in the first half.
It's clever, but is it art?
It's crackers to slip a rozzer the dropsy in sni
It's deja vu all over again.
It's easier to curse the candle than light the darkness.
It's easier to do good than be good.
It's easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them.
It's easier to get forgiveness for being wrong than forgiveness for being right.
It's easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
It's easy to apply yourself, just use crazy glue!
It's easy to be brave from a safe distance.
It's easy to make decisions if you ignore the facts.
It's easy to suggest the solution when you don't know the problem.
It's funny. Now they get it. I guess it's not the music for the overpriveliged. Johnny Ryman, alias Johnny Rotten, punk musician, during a PBS retrospective, 1995
It's funny. You come some place new and everything looks the same.
It's getting better all the time.
It's good to want things   Quark
It's great to be back here again.
It's great to do nothing and rest afterwards.
It's hard to RTFM when you can't find the FM..
It's hard to be humble when you are so perfect.
It's hard to be humble when you're as great as I am.
It's hard to be humble when you're perfect.
It's hard to be serious when you're naked.
It's hard to believe it, but some teens are humans.
It's hard to call the zoo when the lion's busy.
It's hard to make a program foolproof because fools are so ingenious. Anonymous
It's hard to soar with eagles when you work with turkeys.
It's is not, it isn't ain't, and it's it's, not its, if you mean it is. If you don't, it's its. Then too, it's hers. It isn't her's. It isn't our's either.  It's ours, and likewise yours and theirs. | Oxford University Press, Edpress News
It's just a jump to the left...
It's just a storm in a Raktajino cup.
It's later than you think, the joint Russian-American space mission has already begun.
It's later than you think.
It's life Jim, but not as we know it.
It's like Deja Vu all over again...
It's like the coming of civilization. (Anonymous Moscow Resident), opening of the first Russian McDonalds Restaurant, Moscow, 1990
It's lonely at the top, but you eat better!
It's love, it's love that makes the world go round.
It's lucky you're going so slowly, because you're going in the wrong direction.
It's mind over matter - it you don't mind, it don't matter.
It's more than a reader.  It's a message base manager!
It's morning in An Tir, and it's not my fault!
It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
It's never too late to mend Proverb
It's no accident many accuse me of conducting public affairs with my heart instead of my head. Well, what if I do? ... Those who don't know how to weep with their whole heart don't know how to laugh either. Golda Meir
It's nobody's business, not even mine.
It's not 55mph, it's 147,840 furlongs per fortnight.
It's not GEEK - it's SOCIALLY CHALLENGED, dammit
It's not Jerusalem, It's not Baghdad. It's not Bolivia. It's Oklahoma. V.Z. Lawton, bombing survivor, 1995
It's not a BUG, it's an undocumented feature !
It's not a bug, it's a feature.
It's not a bug, it's an undocumented feature !
It's not a crime until you get caught.
It's not a matter of life and death - it's much more important than that.
It's not a perfect world, but what's your excuse?
It's not a person, damnit It's a Borg
It's not a rumor. It's something I heard.
It's not an optical illusion, it just looks like one. | Phil White
It's not cute being this easy.
It's not dying for faith that's so hard, it's living up to it. William Makepeace Thackeray
It's not easy having a good time; even smiling makes my face ache.
It's not easy having an overbearing parent | Troi
It's not enough to be Hungarian; you must have talent too. | Alexander Korda
It's not enough to be busy. The question is: What are we busy about? Henry David Thoreau
It's not hard to meet expenses, they're everywhere.
It's not how old you are but how you are old.
It's not in the manual
It's not my fault, I didn't touch it!
It's not nice to fool Mother Nature.
It's not only fine feathers that make fine birds.
It's not only the most difficult thing to know one's self, but the most inconvenient. Josh Billings
It's not only who you know but what you know about who you know that counts.
It's not over 'till it's over Proverb
It's not over until Milli Vanilli sings!
It's not over until the FAT table sings!
It's not over until the final whistle blows.
It's not pretty being easy
It's not reality that's important, but how you perceive things.
It's not so much how busy you are, but why you are busy. The bee is praised; the mosquito is swatted. Marie O'Conner
It's not so much what you have to learn if you accept weird theories, it's what you have to UNlearn. Isaac Asimov
It's not that I'm afraid to die.  I just don't want to be there when it happens.| Woody Allen
It's not that you and I are so clever, but that the others are such fools.
It's not the age - it's the mileage!
It's not the bullet that kills you, it's the hole.
It's not the fall that kills you, it's the sudden stop.
It's not the money I want, it's the stuff.
It's not the principle of the thing, it's the money
It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts. Will Rogers
It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get up. Vince Lombardi
It's nothing a warm-boot can't fix
It's okay to be ugly...but aren't you overdoing it?
It's okay to call someone stupid; just don't prove it.
It's on that one, the 6th unlabeled floppy.
It's on the other side. | Preudhomme's Law of Window Cleaning
It's one of the tragic ironies of the theatre that only one man in it can count on steady work - the night watchman. Tallulah Bankhead
It's only a hobby ... only a hobby ... only a
It's only during an eclipse that the Man in the Moon has a place in the sun. Anon.
It's only eighteen inches between a pat on the back and a kick in the pants.
It's only ones and zeros.
It's over when the fat lady sits on your face.
It's raining, it's pouring, the old man is...dead, Jim.
It's really age discrimination. They shudder when you mention that. Hal Wright, Age 91, Sierra Booster Newspaper Editor and Flying Paper Boy, after the FAA tried to take away his pilot's license, 1996
It's really good having an effulgent personality.
It's really quite a simple choice: Life, Death, or Los Angeles.
It's running like a scalded dog
It's running like a scalded dog!
It's six o'clock and time for the penguin on top of your terminal to explode.
It's smart to pick your friends - but not to pieces.
It's smart to pick your friends - but not your nose.
It's smart to pick your friends -- but not your nose.
It's smart to pick your friends, but not to pieces.
It's smart to pick your friends, but not your nose.
It's so glamorous, you have to see it. Aretha Franklin, queen of soul, describing the $92 million Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, 1995
It's starting to rain, .SQZ the animals into the .ARC !
It's sweet to be remembered, but cheaper to be forgotten.
It's sweet to be remembered, but it's often cheaper to be forgotten.
It's symbolic of his struggle against reality.
It's ten o'clock, do you know where your processes are?
It's terrible when your cats tease you.
It's the Ugliness Men Mr. Horrible
It's the biggest thing to happen to purple since Barney. Gary Marshall, actor, and head of Murphy Brown's TV network, on Northwestern University's trip to the Rose Bowl, 1996.
It's the goals that count.
It's the good loser who finally loses out. Kin Hubbard
It's time for TAPEWORM!  The game show where YOU'RE the host!
It's time for them to go.
It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that. Alan Alda, actor, 1994
It's too bad ignorance isn't painful.
It's true that I did get the girl, but then my grandfather always said, 'Even a blind chicken finds a few grains of corn now and then.' Lyle Lovett, musician, upon marying actress Julia Roberts, 1994
It's true, forgiveness IS easier to get than permission
It's true: The rich are different from us... they have more money.
It's useless to hold a person to anything he says while he's in love, drunk, or running for office. Shirley MacLaine
It's very beautiful over there. Thomas Edison, last words
It's what inside you, not the outside that counts.
It's what you learn after you know it all that counts. John Wooden
It's wonderful just to be alive.
It's wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago. | Vice President Dan Quayle
It's worse than that, he's dead Jim.
It's worse than that, it's physics, Jim
Italians do it better
Italians do it better!
Iteration, like friction, is likely to generate heat instead of progress. George Eliot
Ith i nk m y ha r d d i sk i sfr a gme n te d !
Ithinkmyspacebarstoppedworking.
Its GOOD to be the King
Its a JOKE, like the funny kind but different.
Its hard being BIG & BLUE.
Its hard being BLUE.
Its hard to be graceful getting off your high horse.
Its more than good enough so I ain't switch'n
Its my tagline I stole it first.
Its my tagline! I stole it first.
Its nice to do nothing and then rest afterwards.
Its not a bug, its a hidden and seldom used feature!
Its not a bug, its an undocumented feature.
Its not a stolen tagline, it's just "previously viewed"
Its not what you do, its the way that you do it.
Its rabbit season. Its duck season.
Itsdifficulttobeverycreativewithonlyfiftysevencharacters
Itsdifficulttobeverycreativewithonlyfiftysevencharacters!
Ivan Poorovitch, Russia's new premier.
Ivo Andric - Yugoslavia's First Nobel Laureate
JACOB'S LAW: To err is human - to blame it on someone else is even more human.
JACQUIN'S POSTULATE: No man's life, liberty, or property are safe when legislature is in session.
JENKENSON'S LAW: It works better if you plug it in.
JFK: I need this motorcade like a hole in my head!
JOHN'S COLLATERAL COROLLARY: In order to get a loan you must first prove that you don't need it.
JOHNSON AND LAIRD'S LAW: Toothache tends to start on Saturday Night.
JONES' LAW OF TV: The only new show worth watching will be cancelled.
JONES'S MOTTO: Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.
JOURNALIST, A professional whose job it is to explain to others what it personally does not understand. Lord Northcliffe
JOYSTICK:  Peripheral used by consulting adults.
JUDGE, A law student who marks his own papers. H.L. Mencken
JUMP! -- One hundred thousand lemmings can't be wrong.
Jack the Ripper excused himself on the grounds that it was human nature.
James Bond rules.  00K.
James Brown: "Help!  I've fallen and I can't get down!"
Jazz is the folk music of the machine age. Paul Whiteman
Jazz may be a thrilling communion with the primitive soul; or it may be an ear-splitting bore. Winthrop Sargeant
Jazz tickles your muscles, symphonies stretch your soul. Paul Whiteman
Jazz will endure as long as people hear it through their feet instead of their brains. John Philip Sousa
Jealousy The way to hold a husband is to keep him a little jealous; the way to lose him is to keep him a little more jealous. H. L. Mencken
Jealousy is ... a tiger that tears not only its prey but also its own raging heart. Michael Beer
Jealousy is all the fun you think they have.
Jealousy is the greatest evil.
Jealousy is the injured lover's hell. John Milton
Jealousy lives upon doubts. It becomes madness or ceases entirely as soon as we pass from doubt to certainty. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Jealousy: all the fun you think they have.
Jean Cocteau Cookbooks bear the same relation to real books that microwave food bears to your grandmother's. Andrei Codrescu
Jean-Luc Picard and Mister Clean:  Separated at birth?
Jean-Luc, I just love your new hairstyle! * Q
Jean-Luc, I love it when you're boring. * Beverly
Jeez, if you love Honkus...
Jeffrey Dahmer... the queer that made Milwaukee famous!
Jenkinson's Law: It won't work.
Jenning's Corollary: The chance of the bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
Jesting Judge of a jest when you have done laughing. William Lloyd
Jesting is often only indigence of intellect. Jean de La Bruyre
Jests that give pains are no jests. Miguel de Cervantes
Jesus Christ is the answer. Now, what was your question
Jesus Saves ! With today's prices, that's a miracle !
Jesus Saves!  But Gretzky scores on the rebound.
Jesus Saves!  With today's prices, that's a miracle!
Jesus Saves!...passes to Moses...shoots! SCORES!
Jesus Saves, Moses Invests, But only Buddha pays Dividends.
Jesus Saves.  The Pope makes tape backups.
Jesus is coming back, and boy, is he ticked!
Jesus loves you.  Everyone else thinks you're a jerk!
Jesus saves sinners and redeems them for VALUABLE prize
Jesus saves sinners and redeems them for VALUABLE prizes !
Jesus saves, Gretsky steals, he shoots, HE SCORES!
Jesus saves. Now offering 14.9% !
Jesus saves... but Lindros scores on the rebound
Jesus saves... passes to Moses... shoots... SCORES !
Jesus saves...Passes to Moses..Shoots....Scores
Jesus saves; now offering 14.9% !!
Jesus started out as a man and has become clip art.  "Bob" started out as clip art and has become a man.
Jet Engine Theory -Suck, Squeeze, Bang, Blow!
Jheeesh!!!
Jim watches in amazement as Spock's ears sprout broccoli.
Jimmy Hoffa--please call home.
Joe's sister puts spaghetti in her shoes
John Cleese I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you don't like?
John Lubbock What we see depends mainly on what we look for. John Lubbock
John Wayne's World:  Party time, Pilgrim.
John Wesley said that if you give up the witchcraft, you must give up the Bible. He is right. The choice is easy for me. Rupert Hughes
Johnson's First Law: When any mechanical contrivance fails, it will do so at the most inconvenient possible time.
Join Amnesiacs Anonymous at um, er...
Join Amnesiacs Anonymous at... hum... er...
Join D.A.M.  -  Mothers Against Dyslexia
Join the Army: Travel to exotic distant lands. meet exciting, unusual people and kill them.
Join the Group Mind - become a Borg
Join the apathy club. We don't care!
Jone's Law: The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
Jone's Motto: Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.
Jones's First Law: Anyone who makes a significant contribution to any field of endeavor, and stays in that field long enough, becomes an  obstruction to its progress -- in direct proportion to the importance of their original contribution.
Joseph Stalin's grave was a Communist Plot.
Journalism Journalists do not live by words alone, although sometimes they have to eat them. Adlai E. Stevenson
Journalism is literature in a hurry. Matthew Arnold
Journalism is unreadable, and literature is unread. Oscar Wilde
Journalism will kill you, but it will keep you alive while you're at it.
Joy Tranquil pleasures last the longest; we are not fitted to bear the burden of great joys. Christian Nestell Bovee
Joy and grief are never far apart. In the same street the shutters of one house are closed while the curtains of the next are brushed by the shadows of the dance. A wedding party returns from the church; and a funeral winds to its door. The smiles and Robert Eldridge Willmott
Joys divided are increased. Josiah Gilbert Holland
Judaism The religion of the Jews is, indeed, a light; but it is as the light of the glow-worm, which gives no heat, and illumines nothing but itself. Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Judaism lives not in an abstract creed, but in its institutions. Auerbach
Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers. Voltaire
Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers. Voltaire
Judge not a carpenter on how fast chips fly.
Judge not the horse by his saddle. Chinese Proverb
Judge people by what they are, not where they are.
Judging a book by it's cover will save you from reading the contents.
Judgment The average man's judgment is so poor, he runs a risk every time he uses it. Ed Howe
Judicial reform is no sport for the short-winded.
Judith Crist One never notices what has been done; one can only see what remains to be done. Marie Curie
Juliet's so happy and in love, but at thr same time so sad and lonely. She's totally neurotic. I could really relate. Alicia Silverstone, Actress, on Shakespeare's Rome and Juliet, 1995
Junior! Quit playing with your floppy.
Junk: stuff we throw away.  Stuff: junk we keep.
Junk: stuff we throw away. Stuff: junk we keep.
Jurassic Park: dinosaurs real, actors simulated.
Jury: A group chosen to decide who has the best lawyer.
Just 'cause it won't work; YOU think its buggy
Just My Opinion (But I'm Right!)
Just Tell Me How To Follow Protocol.
Just a little faster...its not usually this soft.| Greg Marmaland
Just a relocated Blue Hen's chick, here...
Just adding features because 'it won't hurt' -- does.
Just another dull moment in TAGLINES.MR
Just another inmate in this ASYLUM
Just another line in the field of time.
Just ask yourself: "What would McGyver do?"
Just because I'm paranoid, doesn't mean that everyone isn't out to get me
Just because it won't work, YOU think it's buggy !
Just because something doesn't do what you planned it to do doesn't mean it's useless. Thomas Alva Edison, amedican inventor and industrialist
Just because you're STUPID ain't no excuse.
Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you.
Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they AREN'T after you.
Just because your doctor has a name for your condition doesn't mean he knows what it is. Anonymous
Just because your doctor has a name for your condition doesn't mean he knows what it is.|
Just because.
Just bungled it trying to be smart.
Just cannot resist a little fun along the way.  :-)
Just don't give up trying to do what you really want to do. Where there is love and inspiration, I don't think you can go wrong. Ella Fitzgerald
Just don't let Kirk show you what he calls "The Captain's Log."
Just don't tell the asylum you saw me here.
Just for today..... do not anger.
Just gimma a slice of...
Just give Alice some pencils and she will stay busy for hours.
Just give me what the Dr.ordered..OHHOOO Dr Pepper..
Just go out there and do what you have to do. Martina Navratilova
Just got a new car for my wife... Great trade...
Just how much leg have I got
Just my luck - my psychotic episode is a rerun.
Just my two rubber ningis worth.
Just one more question...
Just praise is only a debt, but flattery is a present. Samuel Johnson
Just remember: when you go to court, you are trusting your fate to twelve people that weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty
Just taggin' along for the Rime.
Just take those old records off the shelf...
Just think how much worse life could be
Just think of the tragedy of teaching children not to doubt. Clarence Darrow
Just to have it is enough.
Just try it shorty.  Tasha
Just trying to keep up...
Just waiting for a new version...
Just what does that mean?
Just what part of "NO" didn't you understand...?
Just when I make ends meet, someone moves one end.
Just when you finally make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.
Just when you think you're winning the rat race, along comes a faster rat.
Just when you think you've finally hit bottom, someone tosses you a Keep your head and your heart going in the right direction and you will not have to worry about your feet. Anonymous
Just when you thought it was over you were right.
Justice Justice is the first virtue of those who command, and stops the complaints of those who obey. Denis Diderot
Justice and power must be brought together, so that whatever is just may be powerful, and whatever is powerful may be just. Blaise Pascal
Justice is a commodity which in a more or less adulterated condition the State sells to the citizen as a reward for his allegiance, taxes and personal service. Ambrose Bierce
Justice is a concept. Muscle is the reality. Linda Blandford
Justice is better than chivalry if we cannot have both. Alice Stone Blackwell
Justice is incidental to law and order.
Justice is incidental to law and order. | J. Edgar Hoover
Justice is itself the great standing policy of civil society; and any eminent departure from it, under any circumstances, lies under the suspicion of being no policy at all. Edmund Burke
Justice is justice though it's always delayed and finally done only by mistake. George Bernard Shaw
Justice is the bread of the nation; it is always hungry for it. Franois de Chateaubriand
Justice is the crowning glory of the virtues. Cicero
Justice is the firm and continuous desire to render to everyone that which is his due. Justinian
Justice is the great interest of man on earth. Daniel Webster
Justice is the insurance which we have on our lives and property. Obedience is the premium which we pay for it. William Penn
Justice is the ligament which holds civilized beings and civilized nations together. Daniel Webster
Justice, n.: A decision in your favor.
Justice: A decision in your favor.
Juxtaposition - Dr Arnold Juxta's famous appendix to the Kama Sutra.
KINGDOM.ZIP!!  More than a game, it's an adventure!
KISS : Keep It Simple Stupid.
KITMAN'S LAW: Pure drivel tends to drive ordinary drivel off the TV screen.
KLEPTOMANIA!  Take something for it!
KLIPSTEIN'S ENGINEERING LAW: Dimensions will always be in the wrong units, such as furlongs per fortnight.
KLUGE (kloodj) alt. KLUDGE [from the German kluge, clever] n. 1.  A clever programming trick used as a stopgap measure, and noted for being more efficient than clear. KNOX'S PRINCIPLE: An acquired player fades, a traded player rises to stardom.
KOHN'S COROLLARY: Two wrongs are only the beginning.
KOVAC'S CONUNDRUM: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
KPLA, Klingon radio:  All glory, all the time
Kallisti!
Kamikaze Pilot Wanted: Experienced only need apply.
Karaoke is a Japanese word meaning "tone deaf."
Karma, Let me guess, The Toyota Factory!
Katz' Law: Man and nations will act rationally when all other possibilities have been exhausted.
Keep America beautiful.  Swallow your beer cans.
Keep America beautiful. Swallow your beer cans.
Keep Australia beautiful.  Swallow your beer cans.
Keep Australia beautiful... swallow your beer cans.
Keep London tidy. Eat a pigeon.
Keep NZ Beautiful....  emigrate.
Keep NZ beautiful.  Swallow your beer cans.
Keep Paris tidy -- eat a pigeon.
Keep a clear head and always carry a lightbulb.
Keep a cow, and the milk won't have to be watered but once. Josh Billings
Keep anything long enough and you can throw it away.
Keep cool: it will be all one a hundred years hence. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Keep cool; anger is not an argument. Daniel Webster
Keep emotionally active.  Cater to your favorite neurosis.
Keep emotionally active. Cater to your favorite neurosis.
Keep grandma off the streets -- legalize bingo.
Keep grandmothers off the streets - legalize bingo.
Keep laughing at death, and eventually at least you may die laughing.
Keep repeating: It's only four years......
Keep the Lasagna flying!
Keep the pointy end forward and the dirty side down.
Keep up appearances whatever you do. Charles Dickens
Keep you Eye on the Ball, Your Shoulder to the Wheel, Your Nose to the Grindstone, Your Feet on the Ground, Your Head on your Shoulders. Now ... try to get something DONE
Keep your broken arm inside your sleeve. Chinese Proverb
Keep your eyes on the stars and your feet on the ground., Theodore Roosevelt
Keep your eyes on the stars, and your feet on the ground. Theodore Roosevelt
Keep your eyes open before marriage, half shut afterwards.
Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards. -- Poor Richard.
Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. Helen Keller
Keep your fears to yourself, but share your courage with others. Robert Louis Stevenson
Keep your fears to yourself, but share your inspiration with others., Robert Louis Stevenson
Keep your temper - nobody else wants it.
Keep your words soft and sweet, in case you have to eat them later.
Keep yr eye upon the doughnut,&not upon the hole
Keeping your clothes well pressed will keep you from looking hard pressed. Coleman Cox
Kerr's Three Rules for a Successful College: Have plenty of football for the alumni, sex for the students, and parking for the faculty.
Key Punch - the blow that causes the knockout.
Keyboard error or no keyboard, F1 to continue
Keyboard is unattached.  Press F10 to continue
Keyboard is unattached. Press F1 to continue
Keyboard locked. Press F1 to continue.
Keyboard locked..Press F1 to continue
Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.
Keyboard not attached.Press F10 to continue.
Keyboard not connected, press <F1> to continue.
Keyboard not found, think "F1" to continue.
Keyboard not found. Press F1 to continue.
Keyboard not found. Think F1 to continue.
Keyboard not functioning.  Press F1 to continue.
Keyboard not responding! Press any key ....
Keyboard not responding. Press any key to continue.
Keyboard: Used for entering errors into a system.
Keyboard: device used to enter errors into the computer.
Kibitzer: A person with an interferiority complex.
Kick butt now, take names later?
Kicked wide of the goal with such precision.
Kids' views are often just as valid as the teachers'. The best teachers are the ones that know that. Morley Saefer, Journalist, on Politically Incorrect, 1995
Kids-They're not sleeping, they're recharging
Kids-They're not sleeping, they're recharging!
Kill the lawyers first.
Kill the wabbit  Kill the wabbit
Kill them all!  .... Let God sort them out.
Kill'em All ... Let God Sort Them Out.
Killer velcro | From "101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR"
KiloJoule - what happens if you play football without protection
Kilroy occupied these coordinates.
Kin: An affliction of the blood.
Kindly words do not enter so deeply into men as a reputation for kindness. Mencius
Kindness consists of loving people more than they deserve.
Kindness goes a long ways lots of times when it ought to stay at home. Kin Hubbard
Kindness is a language the dumb can speak and the deaf can hear and understand. Christian Nestell Bovee
Kindness is like a boomerang - it always comes back.
Kindness is loving people more than they deserve. Joseph Joubert
King Wise kings generally have wise counsellors; and he must be a wise man himself who is capable of distinguishing one. Diogenes
Kings is mostly rapscallions. Mark Twain
Kinkler's First Law: Responsibility always exceeds authority.
Kinkler's Second Law: All the easy problems have been solved.
Kirk to Enterprise, Kirk to Enterprise! DAMN, It's BUSY!
Kiss A man snatches the first kiss, pleads for the second, demands the third, takes the fourth, accepts the fifthand endures all the rest. Helen Rowland
Kiss me twice.  I'm schizophrenic.
Kiss me twice. I'm schizophrenic.
Kiss me, I'm a Redneck
Kiss me, Kate, we will be married o'Sunday.
Kiss your keyboard goodbye
Kiss your keyboard goodbye!
Kisses are a better fate than wisdom.
Kisses are love's messengers.
Kissing a man without a moustache is like eating an egg without salt.
Kite fliers keep it up longer.
Kix are for trids.
Klaatu barada nikto.
Klein bottle for rent - inquire within.
Klein bottle for rent -- inquire within.
Kleptomania: take something for it
Kleptomaniac, n.: A rich thief. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Kleptomaniac: a rich thief.
Klingon Battle Cruisers Uncloaking...or is it Odo?
Klingon DOS: That command or file name has no *honour*!
Klingon Thanksgiving Grace:  "Let us prey..."
Klingon adaptation of Earth sport:  Full-contact golf.
Klingon tagline: Strike any user when ready.
Klingons have Ridges.
Knavery and flattery are blood relations. Abraham Lincoln
Knock firm but softly. I like soft firm knockers!
Knock on the sky and listen to the sound! Zen Saying
Know God...No peace.  No God...Know peace.
Know a good chiropractor? My computer has a slipped disk.
Know how to ask. There is nothing more difficult for some people. Nor for others, easier. Baltasar Gracian
Know the true value of time; snatch, seize, and enjoy every moment of it. No idleness; no laziness; no procrastination: never put off till tomorrow what you can do today. Lord Chesterfield
Know thyself.  If you need help, call the C.I.A.
Know thyself? If I knew myself, I'd run away. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Know what I hate most?  Rhetorical questions.| Henry N. Camp
Know what I hate?  I hate rhetorical questions!
Know what I mean...Vern?
Know what I mean?? Wink, wink, nudge, nudge
Know when to quit.
Know your user.
Knowing Murphy's Law won't help either.
Knowing Murphy's law won't help.
Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do. Goethe
Knowledge becomes wisdom only after it has been put to practical use. Anonymous
Knowledge comes, but wisdom lingers. Alfred, Lord Tennyson
Knowledge exists to be imparted. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Knowledge is good.
Knowledge is knowing that we cannot know. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Knowledge is knowing that you don't know.
Knowledge is like money: the more he gets, the more he craves. Josh Billings
Knowledge is power - if you know it about the right person.
Knowledge is power if you know about the right person. Ethel Watts Mumford
Knowledge is power, if you know it about the right person. Ethel Watts Mumford
Knowledge is power.
Knowledge is the eye of desire and can become the pilot of the soul. Will Durant
Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify. Ambrose Bierce
Knowledge must be gained by ourselves. Mankind may supply us with the facts; but the results, even if they agree with previous ones, must be the work of our mind. Benjamin Disraeli
Knowledge rests not on truth alone, but upon error also.
Knowledge without common sense is folly.
Korean War.) The very emphasis of the commandment: Thou shalt not kill, makes it certain that we are descended from an endlessly long chain of generations of murderers, whose love of murder was in their blood as it is perhaps also in ours. Sigmund Freud
Krogt, n. (chemical symbol: Kr): The metallic silver coating found on fast-food game cards. | Rich Hall, "Sniglets"
L'amour faite passer les temps. Les temps faite passer l'amour. (Love makes time pass. Time makes love pass.) French Sundial Motto
L.A.P.D. motto: We treat you like a king
LABEL NOT FOUND : go anywhere you like.
LABOR, n. One of the processes by which A acquires property for B. Ambrose Bierce
LANSAM'S LAWS:  1. Everything depends.  2. Nothing is always.  3. Everything is sometimes.
LAS VEGAS LAW: Never bet on a loser because his luck is bound to change.
LATER..........AS IN MUCH!!
LAW OF CONSTRUCTION: Cut it large and kick it into place.
LAW OF GIFTS: You get the most of what you need the least.
LAW OF LIFE'S HIGHWAY: If everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
LAW OF REVELATION: The hidden flaw always remains hidden.
LAW OF TESTS: If you are given a take-home exam, you will forget where you live.
LAW OF THE KITCHEN: You're always complimented on the item that took the least effort to prepare.
LAW OF THE OFFICE: Important letters which contain no errors will develop errors in the mail.
LAW OF THE SEARCH: The first place to look for something is the last place you'd expect to find it.
LEE'S LAW: In dealing with a body of people, the people will be more tacky than expected.
LEFTY GOMEZ'S LAW: If you don't throw it, they can't hit it.
LEO (July 23 - Aug 22) You consider yourself a born leader.  Others think you are pushy.  Most Leo people are bullies.  You are vain and dislike honest criticism. Your arrogance is disgusting.  Leo people are thieves.
LEO (July 23 - Aug 22) Your determination and sense of humor will come to the fore. Your ability to laugh at adversity will be a blessing because you've got a day coming you wouldn't believe.  As a matter of fact, if you can laugh at what happens to you today, you've got a sick sense of humor.
LEO ROGERS' COMMENTARY: If it's worth doing, it's worth overdoing.
LEVY'S NINTH LAW: Only God can make a random selection.
LIBERAL: A conservative that has been smugged by reality. Anonymous
LIBRA (Sep. 23 to Oct. 22) Your desire for justice and truth will be overshadowed by your desire for filthy lucre and a decent meal. Be gracious and polite. Someone is watching you, so stop staring like that.
LIBRA (Sept 23 - Oct 22) You are the artistic type and have a difficult time with reality. If you are a man, you are more than likely gay. Chances for employment and monetary gains are excellent.  Most Libra women are prostitutes. All Libra people die of Venereal disease.
LIEBERMAN'S LAW: Everybody lies; but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.
LINE STARVE n. inverse of a line feed.
LISP:  To call a spade a thpade.
LISTEN to your children
LITIGATION, n. A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. Ambrose Bierce
LIVING HELL -- More Than You Ever Dreamed Possible
LOGIN PROCEEDING. LOGIN PROCEEDING.
LORD BALFOUR'S CONTENTION: Nothing matters very much, and very few things matter at all.
LOTUS - Let Only The Users Suffer
LOTUS : Let Only The Users Suffer.
LSD melts in your mind, not in your hand.
LSD melts your mind, not in your hand.
LUBARSKY'S LAW OF CYBERNETIC ENTOMOLOGY: There's always one more bug.
LUNACY  my Best personality trait!
LUNG CANCER IN WOMEN MUSHROOMS
LYNCH'S LAW: When the going gets tough everyone leaves.
Labor disgraces no man, but occasionally men disgrace labor. Ulysses S. Grant
Labor is man's greatest function. He is nothing, he can do nothing, he can achieve nothing, he can fulfill nothing, without working. Orville Dewey
Labor, n.: One of the processes by which A acquires property for B. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Lack of something to feel important about is almost the greatest tragedy a man may have. Arthur E. Morgan
Lackland's Laws: 1.  Never be first. 2.  Never be last. 3.  Never volunteer for anything
Lactomangulation, n.:  Manhandling the "open here" spout on a milk carton so badly that one has to resort to using the "illegal" side. | Rich Hall, "Sniglets"
Laddie, ya think ya might like ta ... rephrase that?
Ladies & Gentlemen, Elvis has left the building.
Ladies with an attitude.
Lady Macbeth to her dog: "Out, damned Spot"
Laetrile is the pits
Land of the Single Entendre...
Langsam's Laws: 1) Everything depends. 2) Nothing is always. 3) Everything is sometimes.
Language has created the word loneliness to express the pain of being alone, and the word solitude to express the glory of being alone. Paul Tillich
Language is a city to the building of which every human being brought a stone. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Language is a wonderful thing. It can be used to express thoughts, to conceal thoughts, but more often, to replace thinking. Kelly Fordyce
Language is only the instrument of science, and words are but the signs of ideas. Samuel Johnson
Language is the armory of the human mind, and at once contains the trophies of its past and the weapons of its future conquests. Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Language is the dress of thought. Samuel Johnson
Laptop : lighter than the average secretary.
Laptop: Lighter than the avg. secretary
Larkinson's Law: All laws are basically false.
Last but not least, avoid cliches like the plague; seek viable alternatives.
Last guys don't finish nice.
Last night I dreamed I had insomnia. I woke up exhausted, yet too well rested to go back to sleep., Bob Ingman
Last night I fell asleep in a satellite dish. My dreams were broadcast all over the world. Stephen Wright
Last one out of Mass., shut off the lights.
Last week I couldn't spell prgmar, now I are one!
Last words of Socrates: "I drank what?!?!"
Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. Stephen Wright
Last year many lives were caused by accidents
Last yur I kudnt spel modjerater now I are won.
Latin is a real angina gluteus maximus.
Latinum talks.
Laugh And The World Laughs With You, Fall Over And It Laughs At You.
Laugh and the world laughs with you. Snore and you sleep alone. Anthony Burgess
Laugh and the world laughs with you; snore and you sleep alone.
Laugh and the world thinks you're an idiot.
Laugh at your problems; everybody else does.
Laugh it up, Fuzzball.| Han Solo
Laugh when you can; cry when you must.
Laugh while you can Monkey Boy!
Laugh, and the world ignores you.  Crying doesn't help either.
Laugh, and the world laughs at you.| Peter Campbell
Laugh, and the world laughs with you!
Laugh, and the world laughs with you; weep, and you weep alone Proverb
Laughter He laughs best who laughs last. English Proverb
Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face. Victor Hugo
Laughter is the tonic, the relief, the surcease for pain. Charlie Chaplin
Laughter lubes life's engine.
Laughter...The no side effect tranquilizer.
Laughter: The shortest distance between two people.
Laundry: A place where clothes are mangled.
Law We can not expect to breed respect for law and order among people who do not share the fruits of our freedom. Hubert H. Humphrey
Law is order, and good law is good order.  | Aristotle
Law of Communications: The inevitable result of improved and enlarged communications between different levels in a hierarchy is a vastly increased area of misunderstanding.
Law of Inertia: Given enough time, what you put off doing today will eventually get done by itself.
Law of Insurance and Taxes - Whatever goes up, stays up.
Law of Probable Dispersal: Whatever it is that hits the fan will not be evenly 	distributed.
Law of Probable Dispersal: Whatever it is that hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
Law of Selective Gravity: An object will fall so as to do the most damage.
Law of Supply: It's yours if you don't need nor want it.
Law of the Perversity of Nature: You cannot successfully determine beforehand which side of the bread to butter.
Law stands mute in the midst of arms.
Lawlessness is lawlessness. Anarchy is anarchy is anarchy. Neither race nor color nor frustration is an excuse for either lawlessness or anarchy. Thurgood Marshall
Lawmakers should not be lawbreakers.
Lawrence Radiation Laboratory keeps all its data in an old gray trunk.
Laws are like sausages. It is better not to see them being made. Otto von Bismarck
Laws of Serendipity: 1.  In order to discover anything, you must be looking for something. 2.  If you wish to make an improved product, you must already be engaged in making an inferior one.
Laws that do not embody public opinion can never be enforced. Elbert Hubbard
Lawsuit, n. a machine which you go into as a pig and come out as a sausage. - Ambrose Bierce
Lawyers do it in their briefs.
Lawyers work in their briefs.
Lawyers, the mothers of deception.
Lawyers: Money Bins for words.
Lawyers: the larval form of politicians.
Laziness grows on people; it begins in cobwebs and ends in iron chains. Thomas Fowell Buxton
Laziness is easily mistaken for patience.
Laziness may appear attractive, but work gives satisfaction. Anne Frank
Lazlo's Chinese Relativity Axiom: No matter how great your triumphs or how tragic your defeats -- approximately one billion Chinese couldn't care less.
Le sens commun n'est pas si commun (Common sense is not so common) Voltaire
Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.
Lead me not into temptation. I can find it myself.
Lead me not into temptation; I can find the way myself.
Lead on, MacDuff
Lead on, MacDuff!
Lead, follow, or get the hell out of the way!
Leadership In the great mass of our people there are plenty individuals of intelligence from among whom leadership can be recruited. Herbert Hoover
Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it. Dwight D. Eisenhower
Leadership is the other side of the coin of loneliness, and he who is a leader must always act alone. And acting alone, accept everything alone. Ferdinand Edralin Marcos
Leadership: The art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it. Dwight D. Eisenhower
Lean books are often larded with the fat of others' works.
Learn C++ as a second language !
Learn a foreign language : C !
Learn a foriegn language...C
Learn from your parents mistakes; use birth control.
Learn of the skillful:  he that teaches himself hath a fool for a master. -- Poor Richard.
Learn to fly. Skydive.
Learn to pause--or nothing worthwhile can catch up to you.
Learn to splel, danmit!
Learn why the world wags and what wags it.
Learned Institutions ought to be favorite objects with every free people. They throw that light over the public mind which is the best security against crafty & dangerous encroachments on the public liberty. James Madison
Learned men are the cisterns of knowledge, not the fountainheads.
Learning Zen is a phenomenon of gold and dung. Before you understand it, it's like gold; after you understand it, it's like dung. Zen Saying
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere. Chinese Proverb.
Learning isn't a means to an end; it is an end in itself
Learning makes people fit company for themselves.
Learning to build we learn integrity.
Learning without thought is labor lost. Confucius
Learning without thought is labor lost; thought without learning is perilous.
Leave no stone unturned.
Leave no stone unturned.  | Euripides (431 BC)
Lecture - the process by which a tutor's notes are passed to a student without necessarily passing through the mind of either.
Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse. Murphy's First Corollary
Leftists are among the first to speak of their rights.
Legislators represent people, not trees or acres. Legislators are elected by voters, not farms or cities or economic interests. Earl Warren
Leibowitz's Rule: When hammering a nail, you will never hit your finger if you hold the hammer with both hands.
Leisure is a beautiful garment, but it will not do for constant wear. Anonymous
Leisure is the mother of philosophy.
Leisure is the mother of philosophy. Thomas Hobbes
Lemon curry ?!?
Lemon curry ??
Lend money to a bad debtor and he will hate you.
Less is more. God is in the details. Mies van der Rohe
Less judgment than wit is more sail than ballast. William Penn
Less judgment than wit, is more sail than ballast. William Penn
Lesser artists borrow. Great artists steal.
Let He who taketh the Plunge Remember to return it by Tuesday.
Let X = X.
Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage.
Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage. Pubilius Syrus
Let a fool hold his tongue and the fool will pass for a sage.
Let a man avoid evil deeds as a man who loves life avoids poison. Buddha
Let a man once overcome his selfish terror at his own finitude, and his finitude is, in one sense, overcome. George Santayana
Let bygones be bygones Proverb
Let each man exercise the art he knows. | Aristophanes
Let every fox take care of his own tail. Italian Proverb
Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe to assure the survival and the success of liberty. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
Let go over a cliff, die completely, and then come back to life after that you cannot be deceived. Zen Saying
Let he who takes the plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.
Let he who takes the plunge remember to return it!
Let him make use of instinct who cannot make use of reason. English Proverb
Let him that would move the world first move himself. Socrates
Let him that would move the world, first move himself. Socrates
Let him who is stoned cast the first sin.
Let honesty and industry be thy constant companions, and spend one penny less than thy clear gains; then shall thy pocket begin to thrive; creditors will not insult, nor want oppress, nor hungerness bite, nor nakedness freeze thee. Benjamin Franklin
Let it be impressed upon your minds, let it be instilled into your children, that the liberty of the press is the palladium of all the civil, political, and religious rights. Junius
Let me know if you didn't receive this message!
Let me make the superstitions of a nation and I care not who makes its laws or its songs either. Mark Twain
Let me see what happen when you roll your face on the keyboard.
Let me take you a buttonhole lower.
Let me tell you something that we Israelis have against Moses. He took us 40 years through the desert in order to bring us to the one spot in the Middle East that has no oil!, New York Times, 6//10/73 Golda Meir
Let no good deed go unpunished.
Let no man deceive you with vain words. Biblical Proverb
Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
Let not the sands of time get into your lunch.
Let not your tongue cut your throat.
Let our object be our country, our whole country, and nothing but our country. Daniel Webster
Let the machine do the dirty work.
Let the meek inherit the Earth, I want the stars!
Let the motive be in the deed and not in the event. Be not one whose motive for action is the hope of reward. Kreeshna
Let the other guy have whatever he wants before the fight. Once the bell rings he's gonna be disappointed anyway. George Foreman, relating boxing advice he received from Archie Moore on posturing before a fight, 1996
Let the people know the truth and the country is safe. Abraham Lincoln
Let the person who takes the plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.
Let the word go forth from this time and place, to friend and foe alike, that the torch has been passed to a new generation of Americans. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
Let them eat cache.
Let us be of good cheer, remembering that the misfortunes hardest to bear are those which never happen. James Russel Lowell
Let us be poised, and wise, and our own, today. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Let us be thankful for fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed. Mark Twain
Let us be thankful for the fools; but for them the rest of us could not succeed. Mark Twain
Let us believe neither half of the good people tell us of ourselves, nor half the evil they say of others. John Petit-Senn
Let us celebrate an exhaltation of larks!
Let us develop the resources of our land, call forth its powers, build up its institutions, promote all its great interests, and see whether we also, in our day and generation, may not perform something worthy to be remembered. Daniel Webster
Let us endeavour so to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
Let us have faith that right makes might; and in that faith let us to the end dare to do our duty as we understand it. Abraham Lincoln
Let us live Let us love Let us share the deepest secrets of our souls 		You first.
Let us never negotiate out of fear but let us never fear to negotiate.| John F. Kennedy
Let us never negotiate out of fear. But let us never fear to negotiate. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
Let us not be content to wait and see what will happen, but give us the determination to make the right things happen. Peter Marshall
Let us not confuse stability with stagnation. Mary Jean LeTendre
Let us not look back in anger or forward in fear, but around in awareness. James Thurber
Let us not look back in anger or forward in fear, but around in awareness., James Thurber Patience and perserverence have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish. John Quincy Adams
Let us put theology out of religion. Theology has always sent the worst to heaven, the best to hell. Robert Green Ingersoll
Let us rejoice and be merry.
Let us remember that ours is a nation of lawyers and order.
Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry. Mark Twain
Let us, then, be up and doing, With a heart for any fate; Still achieving, still pursuing, Learn to labor and to wait. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Let your heart feel for the afflictions and distress of everyone, and let your hand give in proportion to your purse. George Washington
Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again!
Let's go DX around the world
Let's go get a pizza
Let's go get a pizza!
Let's have a little fun, let's do a pun.
Let's hope that football will be the winner at the end of the day.
Let's just be friends and make no special effort to ever see each other again.
Let's organize this thing and take all the fun out of it.
Let's see your tagline hunting permit, sir.
Let's spend the night together!
Let's split up, we can do more damage that way.
Let's take the shortcut, he can't see us from there.| Famous last words
Lets all take the TIME to really LISTEN 2 r KIDS
Letting sleeping dogs lie, sleeping cats fry.| Me 90
Lewis's Law of Travel: The first piece of luggage out of the chute doesn't belong to anyone, ever.
Liar, n.: A lawyer with a roving commission. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Liar:  One who tells an unpleasant truth.
Liars when they speak the truth are not believed |Aristotle
Liberal - a power worshipper without power.
Liberal-One who leaves the room when the fight begins.
Liberal: A Conservative who's been indicted.
Liberty What light is to the eyeswhat air is to the lungswhat love is to the heart, liberty is to the soul of man. Robert Green Ingersoll
Liberty can not be preserved without a general knowledge among the people. John Adams
Liberty consists in wholesome restraint. Daniel Webster
Liberty doesn't work as well in practice as it does in speeches. Will Rogers
Liberty is always dangerous, but it is the safest thing we have. Harry Emerson Fosdick
Liberty is the only thing you can't have unless you give it to others. William Allen White
Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it. George Bernard Shaw
Liberty, not communism, is the most contagious force in the world. Earl Warren
Libraries: There are no answers, only cross references.
Lie: A very poor substitute for the truth, but the only one discovered to date.
Lieberman's Law: Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.
Life - brief interlude between nothingness and etern
Life - brief interlude between nothingness and eternity.
Life : what happens when you have other plans.
Life Facts..Death, Taxes, and "THEY" will Tax us to Death
Life Life is the continuous adjustment of internal relations to external relations. Herbert Spencer
Life affords no higher pleasure than that of surmounting difficulties, passing from one step of success to another, forming new wishes and seeing them gratified. Samuel Johnson
Life before the real world -- work.
Life begins at contraception
Life can be great if you live it to the fullest
Life has a great deal up its sleeve.
Life in the twentieth century is like a parachute jump: you have to get it right the first time. Margaret Mead
Life is Roff when yer Stewpid
Life is a banquet & most suckers are starving
Life is a bifurcated chaotic attractor-and then you die.
Life is a continual process of remaking ourselves. Anonymous
Life is a dead-end street. H. L. Mencken
Life is a game of bridge -- and you've just been finessed.
Life is a horse, either you ride it or it rides you.
Life is a long lesson in humility. James M. Barrie
Life is a progress, and not a station. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Life is a sandwich, and it's always lunchtime
Life is a series of collisions with the future; it is not the sum of what we have been, but what we yearn to be. Jose Ortega y Gasset
Life is a series of little deaths out of which life always returns. Charles Feidelson, Jr.
Life is a series of very rude awakenings.
Life is a sexually transmitted and terminal disease.
Life is a sexually transmitted disease
Life is a successon of lessons, which must be lived to be understood. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Life is a tragedy for feelers and a comedy for thinkers.
Life is a tragedy for those who feel, and a comedy for those who think. Jean de La Bruyre
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while.
Life is a yo-yo and mankind keeps tying knots in the string.
Life is a yo-yo, and mankind ties knots in the string.
Life is all sweetness and light.
Life is an onion and one peels it crying.
Life is anything that dies when you stomp it !
Life is boring without EDLIN.
Life is but a moment, death also is but another. Dr Robert Schuller
Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all. Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature. Helen Keller
Life is far too important a thing ever to talk seriously about.
Life is full of pleasant surprises.
Life is full of undocumented features!
Life is getting better all the time.
Life is hard with an extended alphabet... <sigh>
Life is just a bed of roses.
Life is just a figment of my imagination.
Life is like a Car-wash and I'm on a bicycle.
Life is like a cash register, in that every account, every thought, every deed, like every sale, is registered and recorded. Fulton J. Sheen
Life is like a simily
Life is like an onion--you peel off layer after layer, and find nothing in it.
Life is like an onion: you peel off layer after layer, then you find there is nothing in it.
Life is lived forwards, but understood backwards.
Life is no brief candle to me. I is a sort of splendid torch which I have got a hold of for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations. George Bernard Shaw
Life is not a spectacle or a feast, it is a predicament.
Life is not a spectacle or a feast; it is a predicament. George Santayana
Life is not a static thing. The only people who do not change their minds are incompetents in asylums, who can't, and those in cemeteries. Everett M. Dirksen
Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the thousand small uncaring ways. Stephen Vincent Bent
Life is not separate from death. It only looks that way. Native American Proverb (Blackfoot)
Life is one long process of getting tired.
Life is one long struggle in the dark.
Life is one long struggle in the dark. | Lucretius (55 BC)
Life is only as long as you live it.
Life is only understood backward, but must be lived forward.
Life is really just one long party.
Life is serious, but ART is fun!
Life is sexually transmitted, and terminal...
Life is short, eat desert first !
Life is short; live it up. Nikita Krushchev
Life is such a bundle of fun.
Life is that brief interlude between nothingness and eternity.
Life is the art of being well-deceived.
Life is the childhood of our immortality. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Life is the only real counselor; wisdom unfiltered through personal experience does not become a part of the moral tissue. Edith Wharton
Life is to you a dashing and bold adventure.
Life is too short not to be in love !
Life is uncertain...eat dessert first!
Life is what goes by while you are watching television.
Life is what happens to you while you're making other plans.
Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans.
Life is what happens while you are making other plans. John Lennon, singer and songwriter
Life is what we make it, always has been, always will be. Grandma Moses
Life isn't a matter of milestones but of moments. Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy
Life often presents us with a choice of evils rather than of goods. Charles Caleb Colton
Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage. Anaias Nin
Life sucks and then you marry one who won't.
Life sucks, but Death swallows!
Life teems with quiet fun.
Life without learning is death. | Cicero
Life would be easier if I had the source code.
Life would be much easier if I had the source code.
Life would be so much easier if everyone read the manual. Anonymous
Life's Little Mystery #311: The SysRq key
Life's Tragedy is that we get old to soon and wise too late. Benjamin Franklin
Life's a bitch, and then you marry one.
Life's a joke, and we're the punchline.
Life's a witch, then you fly.
Life's contradictions tend to grow.
Life's like a mud sandwich, It gets worse the deeper you get into it.
Life's not passing me by....it's RUNNING ME OVER!!!!
Life's too short to dance with ugly women.|Bumper sticker
Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect. Margaret Mitchell
Life, loathe it or ignore it, you can't like it.
Life, we learn too late, is in the living, the tissue of every day and hour. Stephen Butler Leacock
Life. Don't talk to me about life.| Marvin, the paranoid android
Life... Too many questions, damn few answers.
Life... don't talk to me about life.
Life:  Anything that dies when you stomp it.
Life: what happens when you have other plans.
Light Light is the symbol of truth. James Russell Lowell
Light at end of tunnel will be out until further notice.
Light at the end of the tunnel? Look out for that train.
Light is the first of painters. There is no object so foul that intense light will not make it beautiful. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Light is the task where many share the toil. Homer
Light speed Ridiculous speed Ludicrous speed
Lightning never strikes twice in the same place Proverb
Like one that on a lonesome road Doth walk in fear and dread, And having once turned round walks on, And turns no more his head; Because he knows a frightful fiend Doth close behind him tread. Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made sense from things she found in gift shops. | Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
Like the bee, we should make our industry our amusement. Oliver Goldsmith
Like the ski resort of girls looking for husbands and husbands looking for girls, the situation is not as symmetrical as it might seem. | Alan McKay
Like warmed-up cabbage served at each repast, The repetition kills the wretch at last. Juvenal
Like winter snow on summer lawn, time past is time gone.
Like winter snow on summer lawn, time past is time gone. Anonymous
Like, I think my bottle absorbed my Beer, eh.
Likelihoods, however, are 90% against you.
Likely as not, the child you can do the least with will do the most to make you proud. Mignon McLaughlin
Likes and dislikes are among my favourites
Limbaugh Institute FOR Advanced Conservative Studies.
Limericks are art forms complex, Their topics run chiefly to sex. They usually have virgins, And masculine urgin's, And other erotic effects.
Limit M.P.'s to two terms...1 in Parliament & 1 in Jail.
Linda Ellerbee Millions long for immortality who don't know what to do on a rainy afternoon. Susan Ertz
Line Printer paper is strongest at the perforations.
Line noise provided by Telecom Australia!
Lions & tigers & bears oh my!
Liposuction will destroy your FAT
List(en)ing by phone...
Listen or your tongue will keep you deaf. Native American Proverb
Listen to all, plucking a feather from every passing goose, but, follow no one absolutely. Chinese Proverb
Listen to the rhythm of crashing hard drives...
Listen to the rhythm of the failing bits...
Literature is news that stays news. Ezra Pound
Literature is strewn with the wreckage of men who have minded beyond reason the opinions of others. Virginia Woolfe
Literature is the art of writing something that will be read twice. Cyril Connolly
Literature is the immortality of speech. August Wilhelm von Schlegel
Literature is the orchestration of platitudes. Thornton Wilder
Little Red Riding Hood - Scum Killer
Little boats should keep near the shore.
Little girls are the nicest things that happen to people. Allan Beck
Little minds are tamed and subdued by misfortune; but great minds rise above them. Washington Irving
Little strokes fell great oaks Proverb
Little strokes fell great oaks. Benjamin Franklin
Little thieves are hanged, but great ones escape.
Little things affect little minds. Benjamin Disraeli
Little things attract little minds.
Little things come in small packages.
Live and learn Proverb
Live and let live Proverb
Live and let live.
Live every day as if it were your last. One day you'll be right.
Live in the past and future only.
Live long and suffer  - ancient Vulcan curse.
Live long enough to become a problem to your kids.
Live now -- procrastinate tomorrow!
Live so that the family parrot can live afterwards.
Live so that you can at least get the benefit of the doubt. Kin Hubbard
Live together like brothers and do business like strangers. Arab Proverb
Live with wolves, and you learn to howl. Spanish Proverb
Live with youre income... even if you have to borrow to do it.
Live within your income, even if you have to borrow money to do so. Josh Billings
Live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.
Live your life so that whenever you lose, you are ahead. Will Rogers
Live your own life, for you will die your own death. Latin Proverb
Living is a disease from which sleep gives us relief eight hours a day. Chamfort
Living on Earth may be expensive, but it includes an annual free trip around the Sun.
Living on earth is better than loafing around Hades.
Living poor is best left to those with no money.
Living your life is a task so difficult, it has never been attempted before.
Living: The best demonstration of victory over mortality.
Lizzie Borden took an axe, And plunged it deep into the VAX; Don't you envy people who Do all the things YOU want to do?
Loafer - someone trying to make two weekends meet.
Loan someone a sympathetic ear.
Locked coathanger in car; good thing I had a key.
Lockwood's Long Shot: The chances of getting eaten up by a lion on Main Street aren't one in a million, but once would be enough.
Logg's Rebuttal to Gray's Law: `_n+1' trivial tasks take twice as long as `_n' trivial tasks.
Logic - the principle on which all computers are built, but none seem to run under.
Logic Logic is the anatomy of thought. John Locke
Logic is a little bird, sitting in a tree, that smells AWFUL.
Logic is a little bird, sitting in a tree; that smells AWFUL.
Logic is a pretty wreath of flowers that smells bad
Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence. Manley's Maxim
Logic is a way of going wrong with confidence.
Logic is neither a science nor an art, but a dodge. Benjamin Jowett
Logic is neither an art or a science but a dodge.
Logic is the art of going wrong with confidence. Joseph Wood Krutch
Logic merely enables one to be wrong with authority. Doctor Who, fictional english SF character
Logic! Logic! Logic! I'm sick to death of Logic.
Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. Lord Dunsany
Logic: an instrument used for bolstering a prejudice. Elbert Hubbard
Lomhlaba Unzima, Lohmhlaba. [This world is a harsh place, this world.] Zulu Proverb
Loneliness I was never less alone than when by myself. Edward Gibbon
Loneliness is the most terrible poverty. Mother Teresa
Loneliness is the universal problem of rich people. Joan Collins
Lonely is a man without love.
Lonely is the programer with a debuged program.
Lonely is the programer with a debugged program.
Lonely men seek companionship.  Lonely women sit at home and wait.  They never meet.
Lonely, Worf seeks a Dog/Turtle hybrid for companionship.
Long absent, soon forgotten. Romanian Proverb
Long computations which yield zero are probably all for naught.
Long life is in store for you.
Long live the C64 ! G-g-guys ? I was only kiddin' <BANG !!!>
Long live the ZX81 ! G-g-guys ? I was only kiddin' ! <<BANG !!!>>
Long time his manxome foe he sought
Long years must pass before the truths we have made for ourselves become our very flesh. Paul Valery
Look Ma, No Taglines!
Look afar and see the end from the beginning.
Look after the molehills and the mountains will take care of themselves.
Look before you leap Proverb
Look before you leap.
Look ere ye leap.
Look for a long time at what pleases you, and for a longer time at what pains you. Colette
Look for the good, not the evil, in the conduct of members of the family. Jewish Proverb
Look on my tagline, ye mighty, and despair !
Look out  Behind you AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Look out!... Here comes winter, AGAIN!!
Look over your shoulder now and then to be sure someone's following you. Henry Gilmer
Look twice before you leap. Charlotte Bronte
Look under the sofa cushion; you will be surprised at what you find.
Look, I do hair for a living. If you want to find out what the American people are thinking about, do you sit in an attorney's office or in a barbershop? Monte Moreno, boxer, hairstylist, and republican senate candidate in Minnesota, 1996.
Look, Muth tracks
Look, Muth tracks!
Look, sir 'droids
Look, sir! 'droids!
Looking for Vanna's brains...did you find them?
Looking for a good time?  Call Troi at 1-900-NCC-1701
Looking for a helping hand? There's one on your arm.
Looking out for #1, trying not to step in #2.
Lookout World!  The Modem is Ringing!
Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.
Loose it here and you're in a World of hurts !!
Loquacity and lying are cousins. German Proverb
Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill because they pissed me off. Anon.
Lord, what fools these mortals be
Lord, what fools these mortals be!
Lore: Takes a licking and keeps on twitching.
Lose an hour in the morning, and you will spend all day looking for it. Richard Whately
Lose weight - eat stuff you hate.
Lose weight - put a scale in front of the 'frig.
Losing makes winning worthwhile.
Losing your drivers' license is just God's way of saying "BOOGA, BOOGA!"
Losing your drivers' license is just God's way of saying "BOOGA, BOOGA"
Lost - One Tagline - old, but very cuddly.
Lost time is never found again. John H. Aughey
Lost, yesterday, somewhere between sunrise and sunset, two golden hours, each set with sixty diamond minutes. No reward is offered for they are gone forever. Horace Mann
Lots of comedians have people they try to mimic. I mimic my shadow. Stephen Wright
Lots of fellows think a home is only good to borrow money on. Kin Hubbard
Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny. Kin Hubbard
Lots of people know a good thing the minute the other fellow sees it first. J.E. Hedges
Lots of people know a good thing the minute the other fellow sees it first. Job E. Hedges
Lots of things are easy when you know the answer.
Love America - or give it back.
Love and eggs are best when they are fresh. Russian Proverb
Love and marriage may go together like a horse and carriage, but when was the last time you saw one of those?
Love and scandal are the best sweeteners of tea.
Love at first sight is one of the greatest labor-saving devices the world has ever seen.
Love built on beauty, soon as beauty, dies. John Donne
Love comes for you, and you follow.
Love conquers all things; let us too surrender to love.
Love demands faith and faith firmness.
Love does much but money does more.
Love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward together in the same direction. Antoine de Saint-Exupry
Love doesn't just sit there like a stone; it has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new. Ursula K. LeGuin
Love gives itself; it is not bought. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Love is a canvas furnished by Nature and embroidered by imagination. Voltaire
Love is a fruit in season at all times, and within reach of every hand. Mother Teresa
Love is a matter of chemistry. Sex is a matter of physics.
Love is being willing to share your toothbrush with someone else.
Love is blind but Latinum doesn't argue.
Love is blind but like is just too freaked out to see straight.
Love is blind, marriage is the eye-opener.
Love is grand.  Divorce is twenty grand.
Love is grand. Divorce is fifty grand.
Love is grand. Divorce, twenty grand.
Love is in the offing, said the homicidal maniac.
Love is in the offing.
Love is in the offing.	Be affectionate to one who adores you.
Love is in the offing.  Be affectionate to one who adores you.
Love is in the offing. Be affectionate to one who adores you.
Love is like a pair of socks - you must have two and they have to match.
Love is like dew that falls on both nettles and lilies. Swedish Proverb
Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it, and it darts away. Dorothy Parker
Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket, or a holding pattern over Philadelphia. Judith Viorst
Love is nothing more than sentimental measles.
Love is sentimental measles.
Love is the emplem of eternity; it confounds all notions of time; effaces all memory of begining, all fear of an end. Madame de Stael
Love is the gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everyone else. George Bernard Shaw
Love is the strongest force the world possesses, and yet it is the Greatness is a road leading towards the unknown. Charles de Gaulle
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. | H. L. Mencken
Love is the word used to label the sexual excitement of the young, the habituation of the middle-aged, and the mutual dependence of the old. John Ciardi
Love is, above all, the gift of oneself.
Love levels all enequalities.
Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope. Josh Billings
Love means telling you why you're sorry.
Love of country is like love of womanhe loves her best who seeks to bestow on her the highest good. Felix Adler
Love of money is the root of all politics.
Love prefers twilight to daylight. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Love rules the kingdom without a sword.
Love rules without rules. Italian Proverb
Love sees no faults.
Love shines like a burning star falling from the sky.
Love tells us many things that are not so. Ukranian Proverb
Love the moment, and the energy of that moment will spread beyond all boundaries. Corita Kent
Love the sea?  I dote upon it - from the beach.
Love the sea? I dote upon it -- from the beach.
Love thy neighbor.  Tune thy piano.
Love thy neighbour, but keep the hedge in tact.
Love truth but pardon error.
Love your enemies -- it makes them so damned mad.
Love your enemies. It'll make 'em crazy.
Love your enemies: they'll go crazy trying to figure out what you're up to.
Love your neighbor but don't get caught.
Love your neighbor, but don't tear down your fence. German Proverb
Love's like the measles, all the worse when it comes late. Douglas Jerrold
Love, cough, and a smoke, can't be well hid. -- Poor Richard.
Love: the delusion that one woman differs from another. H. L. Mencken
Loves conquers all things except poverty and a toothache. Mae West, american actress
Low wages are not cheap wages. Louis D. Brandeis
Lowery's Law: If it jams -- force it.  If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
Loyal and efficient work in a great cause, even though it may not be immediately recognized, ultimately bears fruit. Jawaharlal Nehru
Loyalty ... is a realization that America was born of revolt, flourished in dissent, became great through experimentation. Henry S. Commager
Loyalty means nothing unless it has at its heart the absolute principle of self-sacrifice. Woodrow Wilson
Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul. Mark Twain
Lubarsky's Law of Cybernetic Entomology: There's always one more bug.
Luck Depend on the rabbit's foot if you will, but remember it didn't work for the rabbit. R. E. Shay
Lucky is he for whom the belle toils.
Lunatic Asylum, n.: The place where optimism most flourishes.
Lunatic asylum: where optimism most flourishes.
Luxuriantly hand-crafted from only the finest ASCII.
Luxuriantly hand-crafted of only the finest ASCII.
Luxury is the first, second and third cause of the ruin of republics. It is the vampire which soothes us into a fatal slumber while it sucks the lifeblood of our veins. Edward Payson
Luxury may possibly contribute to give bread to the poor; but if there were no luxury, there would be no poor. Henry Home
Luxury: Costs $7.69 to make and $20.00 to market.
Lying is done with words and also with silence. Adrienne Rich
Lysdexia: a peech imspediment we live to learn with...
Lysistrata had a good idea.
M.A.D.D.:  Midgets Against Desk Drawers.
MACINTOSH= Machine Always Crashes If Not The Operating System Hung
MAFIA DOS..Ey'What's A Matta You? Wanna Try Again (Y/n)?
MAIER'S LAW: If the facts do not conform to the theory, they must be disposed of.
MAKE -n -s MY.OBJ $DAY.C PUNK.ASM
MALEK'S LAW: Any simple idea will be worded in the most complicated way.
MARKS' LAW: A fool and your money are soon partners.
MARYANN'S LAW: You can always find what you're not looking for.
MASTURBATION...the human version of AUTOEXEC.BAT.
MATILDA'S SUB-COMMITTEE LAW: If you leave the room, you're elected.
MAYBE, and that's final!
MCGOWAN'S AXIOM: If a Christmas gift is advertised as "under $50", you can bet it's not $19.95.
MCI playing dirtier than the evil empire cause they're #2
MEETING, n: An assembly of people coming together to decide what person or group not represented in the room must solve a problem. Anonymous
MEMORY ERROR: Now what?
MERKIN'S MAXIM: When in doubt, predict that the trend will continue.
METRONOME - a small person riding the subway.
MFM/RLL/SCSI/ESDI/IDE.... what's next
MIDI: Maybe I'll Die Insolvent!
MILES' RULE: Where you stand depends on where you sit.
MILLER'S LAW: Exceptions prove the rule - and wreck the budget.
MILLER'S LAW: You can't tell how deep a puddle is until you step in it.
MINUTATER (min' u tay tur) The smallest french fry in the bag.
MIPS : Meaningless Index of Processor Speed.
MODEM: Modus Operandi Device for Evil Minds
MONEY IS THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL! Send $9.95 for info
MONEY TALKS ...   but all mine ever says is GOODBYE!
MOOSE JAW: The only city named after a Prime Minister !
MOSER'S LAW OF SPORTS: Exciting plays only occur when your are watching the scoreboard or buying food.
MOUNT TAPE U1439 ON B3, NO RING
MP stands for Magnificent Pension.
MPU-401s: All they ever think about is Hex!
MR. BILL . . .Ooooohhh Nooooooooooo({2FE NO CARRIER
MS Word for Windows : from the folks who brought you EDLIN.
MS Word: From the folks who brought you EDLIN
MS-DOS 5.0, Why fix it if it ain't broke!
MS-DOS....DR DOS' Sister.
MS-DOS..MR DOS's sister -- DR DOS..MS DOS's Gynecologist
MUIR'S LAW: When we try to pick out anything by itself, we find it hitched to the universe.
MURPHY'S FLU LAW: If you seem to be getting better, it's your doctor getting worse.
MURPHY'S FLU PHILOSOPHY: Even water tastes bad when taken on doctor's orders.
MURPHY'S GOVERNMENT LAW: If anything can go wrong, it will do so in triplicate.
MURPHY'S LAW OF RESEARCH: Enough research will tend to support your theory.
MURPHY'S LAW: If anything can go wrong, it will.
MURPHY'S OBSERVATION: When it rains, it pours.
MURPHY'S PHILOSOPHY: Smile . . . tomorrow will be worse.
MURPHY'S SAVING GRACE: The worst is the enemy of the bad.
MURPHY'S SEVENTH COROLLARY: Every solution breeds new problems.
MURPHY'S TENTH COROLLARY: Mother Nature is a bitch.
MURRAY'S HOCKEY RULE: Hockey is a game played by six good players and the home team.
MURRAY'S RULE OF BASEBALL: Whatever can go to New York, will.
MURRAY'S RULE OF BASKETBALL: A free agent is anything but.
MURRAY'S RULE OF FOOTBALL: Nothing is ever so bad it can't be made worse by firing the coach.
Mac screen message: "Like, dude, something went wrong."
Mac scrn msg: Like, dude, something went wrong
MacIntosh : a computer with training wheels you can't remove.
MacIntosh: Computer with training wheels you can't remove.
MacIntosh:Computer with training wheels you can't remove.
Machines should work. People should think.
Machines should work; people should think.
Macho does not prove mucho.
Macintosh: Computer with training wheels you can't remove
Macintosh:Computer with training wheels you can't remove.
Macro     Macro     Macro
Mad at your neighbor? Buy his kid a drum!
Mad, adj.: Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence ... | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Madam I'm Adam
Madam, an error, we did a hysterectomy on your husband
Madam, there's no such thing as a tough child -- if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender. | W. C. Fields
Madness takes its toll - please have exact change
Madness takes its toll, exact change please
Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change. Anonymous
Madness takes its toll; please have exact change.
Mafia DOS: "thisa you lasta chance [Y/N]?"
Magnet, n.: Something acted upon by magnetism
Magnetism, n.: Something acting upon a magnet.
Magnocartic, adj.: Any automobile that, when left unattended, attracts shopping carts. | Sniglets, "Rich Hall & Friends"
Magpie, n.: A bird whose theivish disposition suggested to someone that it might be taught to talk. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Maier's Law: If the facts do not conform to the theory, they must be disposed of.
Mail is a Subject's way of producing another Subject.
Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas. Johnny Carson
Main's Law: For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.
Maintain thy airspeed, lest the ground rise up and smite thee.
Maintainer's Motto: If we can't fix it, it ain't broke.
Maintenance release - The janitor wrote it!
Major Premise: Sixty men can do a piece of work sixty times as quickly as one man. Minor Premise: One man can dig a posthole in sixty seconds. Conclusion: Sixty men can dig a posthole in one second. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Majority, n.: That quality that distinguishes a crime from a law.
Make Headlines..use a corduroy pillow....
Make a difference in the world today: Subtract
Make a living, but make room for life.
Make a wish, it might come true.
Make friends with sysops; page them at 3:00 am.
Make happy those who are near, and those who are far will come. Chinese Proverb
Make haste slowly. Latin Proverb
Make hay while the sun shines Proverb
Make input easy to proofread
Make it as simple as possible, but no simpler.
Make it do ... Or do without.
Make it right before you make it faster.
Make like a Tom and Cruise.
Make like a bottom and split.
Make like a drum and beat it!
Make like a shepherd and get the flock out of here.
Make like a tree and leave.
Make me an offer. I have a computer to support
Make me breakfast and perhaps I'll consider it. | Troi
Make my day, kill a GUI today.
Make new friends but keep the old ones;  One is silver and the other's gold.
Make revolution a parent of settlement, and not a nursery of future revolutions. Edmund Burke
Make somebody happy. Mind your own business.
Make something idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot.
Make sure all variables are initialized before use.
Make sure comments and code agree.
Make sure to be in with your equals if you're going to fall out with your superiors. Jewish Proverb
Make sure your code "does nothing" gracefully.
Make the most of the best and the least of the worst.
Make them eat wake
Make this evening a memorable one.
Make three consecutive correct guesses and you will be considered an expert.
Make tracks for Moose Breath Montana
Make two grins grow where there was only a grouch before.
Make way ! Make way ! A PROGRAMMER HAS ARRIVED !
Make your life a mission - not an intermission. Glasgow
Make yourself an honest man, and then you may be sure there is one less rascal in the world. Thomas Carlyle
Make yourself necessary to somebody. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Malek's Law: Any simple idea will be worded in the most complicated way.
Malice is merely stupidity raised to a higher power.
Mama don't let me do no rock-'an-roll.
Man Gives Birth to 9 Pound baby Girl!
Man and wife make one fool.
Man can believe the impossible, but can never believe the improbable. Oscar Wilde
Man does not live by coffee alone. Have a danish!
Man endures pain as an undeserved punishment; woman accepts it as a natural heritage. Anonymous
Man has his will.  But woman has her way!
Man has his will.  Woman has her won't!
Man has received direct from God only one instrument wherewith to know himself and to know his relation to the universehe has no otherand that instrument is reason. Leo Tolstoi
Man has responsiblity, not power. Native American Proverb (Tuscarora)
Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. Lilly Tomlin, actress, author and commedian
Man invented language to satisfy his need to complain.
Man is a make-believe animal, he is never so truly himself as when he is acting a part. William Hazlitt
Man is a make-believe animal: he is never so truly himself as when he is acting a part. William Hazlitt
Man is a piece of the universe made alive. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Man is a political animal by nature; he is a scientist by chance or choice; he is a moralist because he is a man. Hans J. Morgenthau
Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when called upon to act in accordance with the dictates of reason. Oscar Wilde
Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in accordance with the dictates of reason. | Oscar Wilde
Man is a reasoning rather than a reasonable animal. Alexander Hamilton
Man is a special being, and if left to himself, in an isolated condition, would be one of the weakest creatures; but associated with his kind, he works wonders. Daniel Webster
Man is by nature a political animal.
Man is by nature a political animal. | Aristotle
Man is his own worst enemy. Cicero
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask and he will tell the truth. Oscar Wilde
Man is nature's brightest jewel. Isn't that great?
Man is not imprisoned by habit. Great changes in him can be wrought by crisisonce that crisis can be recognized and understood. Norman Cousins
Man is not logical and his intellectual history is a record of mental reserves and compromises. He hangs on to what he can in his old beliefs even when he is compelled to surrender their logical basis. John Dewey
Man is only miserable so far as he thinks himself so. Jacopo Sannazaro
Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft ... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor. | Wernher von Braun
Man is the missing link between apes and human beings.
Man is the only animal that blushes -- or needs to. | M. Twain
Man is the only animal that blushes -- or needs to.| Mark Twain
Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to. Mark Twain
Man is the only animal that blushes... or needs to.
Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victems he intends to eat until he eats them. Samuel Butler
Man is the only creature that refuses to be what he is. Albert Camus
Man is, and always has been, a maker of gods. It has been the most serious and significant occupation of his sojourn in the world. John Burroughs
Man learns more readily and remembers more willingly what excites his ridicule than what deserves esteem and respect. Horace
Man looks into the abyss, and sees himself.
Man loves little and often, woman much and rarely.
Man makes a great fuss about this planet which is only a ballbearing in the hub of the universe. Christopher Morley
Man must go back to nature for information. Thomas Paine
Man only likes to count his troubles, but he does not count his joys. Fyodor Dostoyevsky
Man usually avoids attributing cleverness to somebody else -- unless it is an enemy. | A. Einstein
Man was made at the end of the week's work when God was tired. Mark Twain
Man who bites bread or eats peas with knife is lost creature.
Man who eats too many prunes, sits on toilet, many moons
Man who falls in blast furnace is certain to feel overwrought.
Man who falls in vat of molten optical glass makes spectacle of self.
Man who get hit by car,get that run down feeling
Man who has tool in box is not necessarily carpenter.| Confucious
Man will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest. Denis Diderot
Man will never fly.  Space travel is merely a dream.  All aspirin is alike.
Man will not live without answers to his questions. Hans J. Morgenthau
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue.
Man with atletic finger make broad jump.
Man's capacity for justice makes democracy possible, but man's inclination to injustice makes democracy necessary. Reinhold Niebuhr
Man's fear of ideas is probably the greatest dike holding back human knowledge and happiness. Morris Leopold Ernst
Man's horizons are bounded by his vision.
Man's inhumanity to man Makes countless thousands mourn! Robert Burns
Man's inhumanity to man makes countless thousands mourn.
Man's mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions.| Oliver Wendell Holmes
Man's reach should exceed his overbite.
Man, living, feeling man, is the easy sport of the over-mastering present. Johann von Schiller
Man, that ligntning sounds closo7 NO CARRIER
Man-like it is to fall into sin; fiendlike it is to dwell therein. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Man: There is nothing more miserable and more arrogant.
Managing Director - the person responsible for making it difficult for other people to do their work.
Managing programmers is like herding cats.
Managing senior programmers is like herding cats.
Mandatory tagline not required for this message
Mandatory tagline not required for this message.
Manifest: Why lift the hood?
Manners easily and rapidly mature into morals. Horace Mann
Manners require time, and nothing is more vulgar than haste. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Manual, n.: A unit of documentation.  There are always three or more on a given item.  One is on the shelf; someone has the others. The information you need in in the others. | Ray Simard
Manuals out, after all possible keystrokes have failed.
Many a family tree needs trimming.
Many a family tree needs trimming.
Many a good man I have seen go under. Walt Whitman
Many a good newspaper story has been ruined by oververification. James Gordon Bennett
Many a man fails as an original thinker simply because his memory is too good. Friedrich Nietzsche
Many a man fails to become a thinker only because his memory is too good. Nietzsche
Many a man has fallen in love with a girl in a light so dim he would not have chosen a suit by it. Maurice Chevalier
Many a man never fails because he never tries.
Many a man never fails because he never tries. Norman MacEwan
Many a man spanks his children for the things his own father should have spanked out of him. Don Marquis
Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street. Elbert Hubbard
Many a man's vices have at first been nothing worse than good qualities run wild. Augustus and Julius Hare
Many a one, for the sake of finery on the back, has gone with a hungry belly, and half-starved their families. 'Silks and satins, scarlets and velvets, put out the kitchen fire,' as Poor Richard says. Benjamin Franklin
Many a person seems to think it isn't enough for the government to guarantee him the pursuit of happiness. He insists it also run interference for him. Anonymous
Many a true word is spoken in jest.
Many a true word is spoken in jest. English Proverb
Many a yo-yo think he have the world on a string.
Many are always praising the by-gone time, for it is natural that the old should extol the days of their youth; the weak, the time of their strength; the sick, the season of their vigor; and the disappointed, the spring-tide of their hopes. Caleb Bingham
Many are called, few are chosen.  Fewer still get to do the choosing.
Many are called, few volunteer.
Many are cold, but few are frozen.
Many are cold, few are frozen.
Many are destined to reason wrongly; others, not to reason at all; and others, to persecute those who do reason. Voltaire
Many are educated...few are learned...
Many are saved from sin by being so inept at it. Mignon McLaughlin
Many changes of mind and mood; do not hesitate too long.
Many forms of Government have been tried, and will be tried in this world of sin and woe. No one pretends that democracy is perfect or all-wise. Indeed, it has been said that democracy is the worst form of Government except all those others that have been tried from time to time. Sir Winston Churchill
Many foxes grow grey, but few grow good.
Many hands make light work Proverb
Many hands make light work.
Many hands make light work. | John Heywood (1497-1580)
Many have quarreled about religion that never practiced it. Benjamin Franklin
Many ideas grow better when transplanted into another mind than in the one where they sprung up. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Many individuals have, like uncut diamonds, shining qualities beneath a rough exterior. Juvenal
Many kiss the hand that they wish cut off.
Many men have been capable of doing a wise thing, more a cunning thing, but very few a generous thing. Alexander Pope
Many men know how to flatter, few men know how to praise. Greek Proverb
Many men smoke, but fu man chu
Many of the world's troubles are not due just to Russia or communism. They would be with us in any event because we live in an era of revolutionthe revolution of rising expectations. Adlai E. Stevenson
Many pages make a crowded castle.
Many pages make a thick book, except for pocket bibles on very thin paper.
Many pages make a thick book, except for pocket bibles which are on very very thin paper.
Many pages make a thick book.
Many people are unenthusiastic about their work.
Many people are unenthusiastic about your work.
Many possess the wisdom of many and only the wit of one.
Many receive advice, few profit by it.
Many receive advice, only the wise profit by it.
Many receive advice, only the wise profit from it.| Syrus
Many things difficult to design prove easy to performance. Samuel Johnson
Many times in order to receive something, you have to ask for it.
Many would be cowards if they had courage enough.
Many would be cowards if they had enough courage.
Many years ago in a period commonly know as Next Friday Afternoon, there lived a King who was very Gloomy on Tuesday mornings because he was so Sad thinking about how Unhappy he had been on Monday and how completely Mournful he would be on Wednesday ... | Walt Kelly
Marching to a different kettle of fish.
Marching to the beat of a different kettle of fish...
Marie-Claude, I 8 U !!!
Marilyn Monroe?  A vacuum with nipples.
Mark this well, you proud men of action! you are, after all, nothing but unconscious instruments of the men of thought. Heinrich Heine
Mark's Dental-Chair Discovery: Dentists are incapable of asking questions that require a simple yes or no answer.
Marriage -- a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
Marriage is our last, best chance to grow up. Joseph Barth
Marriage is punishment for shoplifting in some countries.
Marriage is that relation between man and woman in which the independence is equal, the dependence mutual, and the obligation reciprocal. Louis K. Anspacher
Marriage is the main cause for divorce.
Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly.
Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly. -- Voltaire.
Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly. | Voltaire
Marriage is the torment of one, the felicity of two, the strife and enmity of three. Washington Irving
Marriage isn't a word, it's a sentence.
Marriage resembles a pair of shears, so joined that they cannot be separated; often moving in opposite directions, yet always punishing any one who comes between them. Sydney Smith
Marriage, a romance but the hero dies in the 1st chapter.
Marriage, n. a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two. - Ambrose Bierce
Marriage?  Sorry, I can't mate in captivity.
Marriages are based on believing you won the arguments.
Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on earth.
Marry not a tennis player.  For love means nothing to them.
Marry your mistress, create a job vacancy.
Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house. Jean Kerr
Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything in the house. Jean Kerr
Mary had a little RAM -- only about a MEG or so.
Mary had a little lamb, a little beef, a little ham.
Mary had a little lamb.  The doctor was surprised.
Mass production is for the masses. E. A. Filene
Massachusetts has the best politicians money can buy.
Massive expenditures obscure the evidence of bad judgments.
Master Baiter
Master Nansen was washing clothes. A monk asked: 'Is the Master still doing such things?' Master Nansen, holding up his clothes, asked: 'What is to be done with them?' Zen Mondo
Master of all I survey (at the moment, empty pizza boxes)
Master of images, songs shine a light on you.
Mastermind specialist subject - the bleedin' obvious..
Masturbation is coming unscrewed.
Material blessings, when they pay beyond the category of need, are weirdly fruitful of headache. Philip Wylie
Math and alcohol don't mix. Please don't drink and derive.
Math is the language God used to write the universe.
Math problems? Call 1-800-10*(24+13)-(64-16)/2^14E2.
Mathematicians practice absolute freedom.
Mathematics is a game with rules and no objectives. Anonymous
Mathematics is the language God used to write the universe.
Matrimony is the root of all evil.
Matrimony isn't a word, it's a sentence.
Matrix me the Epson way !
Matter cannot be created or destroyed, nor can it be returned without a receipt.
Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value.
Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value. Murphy's Constant
Mature software:  code old enough that for every bug fixed, one or more new bugs are created. | Karl Lehenbauer
Maturity consists in no longer being taken in by oneself. Kajetan von Schlaggenberg
Maturity is often more absurd than youth and very frequently is most unjust to youth. Thomas A. Edison
Maturity is only a short break in adolescence. | Jules Feiffer
Maturity is the time of life when, if you had the time, you'd have the time of your life. Anonymous
Max, as a unary function, isn't very interesting.
Maxims are like lawyers who must need to see but one side of the case. Frank Gelett Burgess
Maxims are the condensed good sense of nations. James Mackintosh
May Euell Gibbons eat your only copy of the manual
May Godzilla get heartburn while standing in your backyard.
May I buy less government please?
May a 20 foot Boa Constrictor give you a passionate hug.
May a Misguided Platypus lay its Eggs in your Jockey Shorts
May a burly person take exception to the way your face is arranged.
May a crazed yak fall in love with your sister.
May a cricket take up residence in your doctor's stethoscope just before your annual checkup.
May a diseased elephant sit on your face.
May a diseased yak become your houseguest for a month.
May a flight of Canada geese hover above you.
May a fungus devour your IRS refund check.
May a great white shark use you for a teething ring.
May a herd of diseased wildebeest stampede through your bedroom.
May a king cobra make a nest in your bed.
May a live electric eel take up residence in your underwear.
May a lovestruck mule follow you constantly.
May a nest of killer scorpions take residence in your shoe closet.
May a pregnant elephant choose your living room for the delivery.
May a rabid hyena follow you constantly.
May a rabid vampire bat give you a neck hickey.
May a rabid wolf inhabit your closet.
May a skunk take up residence in your sock drawer.
May a small rodent find his way into your jodhpurs.
May a weird holy man move in with you.
May a weird holy man put a curse on you.
May all of your successes be failures in disguise, and all of your failures be catastrophic.
May all your PUSHes be POPed.
May all your pushes be popped.
May all your relatives decide to visit un-announced simultaneously.
May all your teeth save one fall out. And may you have a toothache in that one.
May all your troubles increase exponentially.
May an abnormal person talk you into joining a religious sect that eats ping pong paddles
May an insincere glassblower give you mouth to mouth resuscitation.
May an overzealous siding salesman scotchtape 5000 woodpeckers to your house.
May fire ants nest in your garden.
May fortune favor the foolish.
May gold be discovered on your land the day before you find out that the land isn't really yours.
May mice nest in your silverware drawer.
May the FORCE be with you !!!
May the Farce be with you
May the Farce be with you !
May the Fleas of a Thousand Camels infest one of your Erogenous Zones.
May the Forth be with you !
May the Porsche be with you.
May the bird of paradise fly up your nose.
May the bird of paradise peck a hole in your eardrum.
May the bluebird of happiness crap all over your birthday cake.
May the bugs of many programs nest on your hard drive.
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits.
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your pubic hair.
May the force be with you.| Luke Skywalker
May the next version of WP be the last !
May the wind behind you always be your own.
May we kiss those we please, and please those we kiss.
May you be French-kissed by a leprous aardvark.
May you be held hostage for the release of the unknown soldier's grandmother.
May you die in bed at 105, shot by a jealous spouse.
May you fall off the Sears tower the day before man learns how to fly.
May you find out that your lover is having a sex change operation.
May you forget your best friends name as you deliver his eulogy.
May you get a love letter from the Ayatollah Khomeini.
May you get herpes the week before a preventative vaccine is announced.
May you get mouth to mouth resuscitation from a paramedic with trench mouth.
May you invent the perfect mousetrap the day after the mouse becomes extinct.
May you live all the days of your life.
May you live all the days of your life. Jonathan Swift (Polite Conversation)
May you live in interesting times.
May you live in uninteresting times.
May you never know peace.
May you never live to see your wife a widow !
May you take up a career in bomb disposal and earn the nickname 'Clumsy'.
May you wake up in the morning next to a dead orangutan.
May your Tongue stick to the Roof of your Mouth with the Force of a Thousand Caramels.
May your blind date insist on wearing a ski mask.
May your brother become a gay porno film actor.
May your brother take up go-go dancing at a gay bar.
May your favourite sports team take permanent residence in the cellar.
May your life be filled with experiences.
May your lover insist on separate tables at a fancy restaurant.
May your lucky rabbit's foot be attached to an 800 lb. rabbit.
May your neighbour get a 30 foot Anaconda for a pet.
May your priest offer to sell you a tape recording of your last confession.
May your sister fall hopelessly in love with another woman.
Maybe Computer Science should be in the College of Theology.
Maybe Computer Science should be in the College of Theology. | R. S. Barton
Maybe it's right to be nervous now...
Maybe this world is another planet's Hell.
Maybe you can't buy happiness, but these days you can certainly charge it.
Mayor Vincent J. `Buddy' Cianci on the ACLU's suit to have a city nativity scene removed: "They're just jealous because they don't have three wise men and a virgin in the whole organization."
McBorg:  Over 50 million assimilated
McBorg: Over 50 million assimilated.
McGowan's Madison Avenue Axiom: If an item is advertised as "under $50", you can bet it's not $19.95.
Me and Janet really are two different people. Michael Jackson, singer, songwriter, and megastar, 1993
Me hates peoples who don't use gooder English.
Me hav'em heap trouble. - Tonto the programmer
Me know gammar.  Me cood use it gud.
Me, indecisive ? I don't think I am, do you ?
Me, indecisive? I'm not so sure about that.
Me...A Skeptic ? I trust you to have proof...
Meader's Law: Whatever happens to you, it will previously have happened to everyone you know, only more so.
Meaning of Life The search is what anyone would undertake if he were not sunk in the everydayness of his own life. To become aware of the possibility of the search is to be onto something. Not to be onto something is to be in despair. Walker Percy
Meaning of life: <deleted for lack of space>
Meaning of life: To m$` NO CARRIER
Measure a thousand times and cut once. Turkish Proverb
Measure not men by Sundays, without regarding what they do all the week after. Thomas Fuller
Measure with a micrometer.  Mark with chalk.  Cut with an axe.
Medicine is my lawful wife and literature my mistress; when I get tired of one, I spend the night with the other. Anton Chekhov
Mediocrity requires aloofness to preserve it's dignity
Meditation is not what you Think.
Meekness is uncommon patience in planning a worthwhile revenge.
Meep, Meep, (and picture a cloud of smoke...)
Meet the new Boss--same as the old Boss...
Meeting Franklin Roosevelt was like opening your first bottle of champagne; knowing him was like drinking it. Sir Winston Churchill
Meeting, n.: An assembly of people coming together to decide what person or department not represented in the room must solve a problem.
Meetings are indispensable for not doing anything.
Meets government specs, if any are applicable.
Mega dittos from the Bayou State . . .
MegaMail----What A Wonderful Toy!
MegaMail:  The Mother of All Readers
MegaReader  tester - and PROUD of it!
MegaReader eta rigade
Megabyte: A nine course dinner.
Megahertz--when something is really painful.
Member, the Society for Creative Anachronism.
Member: International Brotherhood of Tagline Thieves
Memoirs are the backstairs of history.
Memories keep the wolf of insignificance from the door.
Memory allocation error: Reboot System!
Memory is a thing we forget with.
Memory is the cabinet of imagination, the treasury of reason, the registry of conscience, and the council chamber of thought. Saint Basil
Memory is the greatest of artists, and effaces from your mind what is unnecessary. Maurice Baring
Memory is the second thing to go.
Memory should be the starting point of the present.
Memory....??....What memory??
Men ... are sent into the world with bills of credit, and seldom draw to their full extent. Horace Walpole
Men acquire a particular quality by constantly acting in a particular way. Aristotle
Men and nations will act rationally when all other possibilities have been exhausted.
Men are able to trust one another, knowing the exact degree of dishonesty they are entitled to expect. Stephen Butler Leacock
Men are apt to mistake the strength of their feeling for the strength of their argument. The heated mind resents the chill touch and relentless scrutiny of logic. William E Gladstone
Men are apt to prefer a prosperous error to an afflicted truth. Jeremy Taylor
Men are born with two eyes, but only one tongue, in order that they should see twice as much as they say. Charles Caleb Colton
Men are born with two eyes, but with one tongue, in order that they should see twice as much as they say. Charles Caleb Colton
Men are men before they are lawyers, or physicians, or merchants, or manufacturers; and if you make them capable and sensible men, they will make themselves capable and sensible lawyers or physicians. John Stuart Mill
Men are not punished for their sins, but by them. Elbert Hubbard
Men are often capable of greater things than they perform. They are sent into the world with bills of credit, and seldom draw to their full extent. Horace Walpole
Men are probably nearer the central truth in their superstitions than in their science. Henry David Thoreau
Men are respectable only as they respect. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Men are so constituted that every one undertakes what he sees another successful in, whether he has aptitude for it or not. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Men are what their mothers made them. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Men are wise in proportion, not to their experience, but to their capacity for experience. George Bernard Shaw
Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingness to believe, but in proportion to their readiness to doubt. H. L. Mencken
Men blush less for their crimes than for their weaknesses and vanity. Jean de La Bruyre
Men commonly think according to their inclinations, speak according to their learning and imbibed opinions, but generally act according to custom. Francis Bacon
Men do not mind a bust in the mouth if provided by beautiful voluptuous lady!
Men fear death, as if unquestionably the greatest evil, and yet no man knows that it may not be the greatest good. William Mitford
Men get opinions as boys learn to spell, By reiteration chiefly. Elizabeth Barrett Browning
Men give away nothing so liberally as their advice. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Men have become tools of their tools.
Men have become tools of their tools. Henry David Thoreau
Men have become tools of their tools. Thoreau
Men heap together the mistakes of their lives, and create a monster they call Destiny. John Oliver Hobbes
Men lose their tempers in defending their taste. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Men love to wonder and that is the seed of our science. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Men love to wonder, and that is the seed of science.
Men marry because they are tired; women because they are curious. Both are disappointed. Oscar Wilde
Men marry to make an end; women to make a beginning. Alexis Dupuy
Men must be governed by God or they will be ruled by tyrants. William Penn
Men occasionally stumble on the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing had happened. Sir Winston Churchill
Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing happened. Winston Churchill
Men play the game; women know the score.
Men seldom show dimples to girls who have pimples.
Men seldom, or rather never for a length of time and deliberately, rebel against anything that does not deserve rebelling against. Thomas Carlyle
Men show their character best by the things they laugh at.
Men show their character in nothing more clearly than by what they think laughable. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Men still remember the first kiss after women have forgotten the last.
Men talk of 'finding God,' but no wonder it is difficult; He is hidden in that darkest hiding-place, your heart. You yourself are a part of Him. Christopher Morley
Men tire themselves in pursuit of rest. Laurence Sterne
Men were real men, women were real women, and small, furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were REAL small, furry creatures from Alpha Centauri.  Spirits were brave, men boldly split infinitives that no man had split before.  Thus was the Empire forged. | "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy", Douglas Adams
Men who do things without being told draw the most wages. Edwin H. Stuart
Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of them will own up to a lack of humor? Frank Moore Colby
Men will sooner surrender their rights than their customs. Moritz Guedmann
Men willingly believe what they wish. | Julius Caesar
Men wish to be saved from the mischiefs of their vices, but not from their vices. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Men's hearts ought not to be set against one another, but set with one another, and all against evil only. Thomas Carlyle
Men's minds are too ready to excuse guilt in themselves. Livy
Men's vows are women's traitors! William Shakespeare
Men, their rights, and nothing more; women, their rights, and nothing less. Susan B. Anthony
Mencken and Nathan's Fifteenth Law of The Average American: The worst actress in the company is always the manager's wife.
Mencken and Nathan's Ninth Law of The Average American: The quality of a champagne is judged by the amount of noise the cork makes when it is popped.
Mencken and Nathan's Second Law of The Average American: All the postmasters in small towns read all the postcards.
Mencken and Nathan's Sixteenth Law of The Average American: Milking a cow is an operation demanding a special talent that is possessed only by yokels, and no person born in a large city can never hope to acquire it.
Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay.
Menu, n.: A list of dishes which the restaurant has just run out of.
Menu: A list of dishes which the restaurant has just run out of.
Mercifully free of the ravages of intelligence.
Mercy among the virtues is like the moon among the stars ... It is the light that hovers above the judgment seat. Edwin Hubbel Chapin
Mere longevity is a good thing for those who watch Life from the side lines. For those who play the game, an hour may be a year, a single day's work an achievement for eternity. Gabriel Heatter
Mere unorthodoxy or dissent from the prevailing mores is not to be condemned. The absence of such voices would be a symptom of grave illness in our society. Earl Warren
Meskimen's Law: There's never time to do it right, but there's always time to do it over.
Message will arrive in the mail.  Destroy, before the FBI sees it.
Message-write macros, Made to Order.
Method acting.. I'm vaguely aware of it. | Picard
Mice are handy accessories, but I prefer gerbils
Mickey Mouse wears a Spiro Agnew watch.
Micro Credo: Never trust a computer bigger than you can lift.
Micro$oft finally did SOMETHING right : DOS 9.9 !
MicroSoft finally did SOMETHING right... DOS 99 !
Microbiology Lab: Staph Only!
Microbrain, growl for me, let me know you still care. | Q
Microfiche: Sardines.
Microsecond: Amount of time needed for a program to bomb.
Microsoft is suing Apple 'cause they have employees too.
Microsoft is suing Apple because they have employees too.
Microsoft should stick to word processors, and leave the operating systems to Digital Research.
Microsoft  Where do you want to go today ... after Windows loads ...
Microsoft: To badly go where more clever people have avoided going.
Midden:  a kind of fingerless glove
Middle Age is when your age starts to show around your middle. Bob Hope
Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. Don Marquis
Middle age: When your age starts to show at your middle.
Middle age: halfway between adolescence and obsolescence
Mie Croc Sauf The, Bord Lande, Lotte Us, etc...
Might as well be frank, monsieur; it would take a miracle to get you out of Casablanca.
Might as well face it : you're addicted to code.
Migratory lifeform with a tropism for parties
Miksch's Law: If a string has one end, then it has another end.
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms. Groucho Marx
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms. | Groucho Marx
Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.| Groucho Marx
Military intelligence is a contradiction of terms.
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music. | Groucho Marx
Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.| Groucho Marx
Military secrets are the most fleeting of all. - Spock
Millihelen: Amount of beauty required to launch one ship.
Millihelen: unit of beauty required to launch one ship.
Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon. | Susan Ertz
Millisecond:  Delay between a green light and honking horns
Mind if I rape your daughter
Mind if we call you 'Bruce' to keep it clear?
Mind your own business, Spock.	I'm sick of your half-breed interference.
Mind your own business, Spock.  I'm sick of your half-breed interference.
Mind your own business, Spock. I'm sick of your half-breed interference.
Mind your p's and q's Proverb
Minding your own business will not be tolerated.
Minds are like parachutes, they only function when open. Anonymous
Minds are like parachutes, they only work when open.
Minds are like parachutes..They only work when they're open.
Minds, like parachutes, work only when open.
Minds, like parachutes, work only when they are open.
Mine is better than ours. Benjamin Franklin
Minnie Mouse is a slow maze learner.
Minorities are the stars of the firmament; majorities, the darkness in which they float. Martin H. Fischer
Miracle owes its origin to the negation of thought.
Miracles In those parts of the world where learning and science has prevailed, miracles have ceased; but in those parts of it as are barbarous and ignorant, miracles are still in vogue. Ethan Allen
Miracles happen to those who believe in them. Otherwise why does not the Virgin Mary appear to Lamaists, Mohammedans, or Hindus who have never heard of her? Bernard Berenson
Mirth is the sweet wine of human life. It should be offered sparkling with zestful life unto God. Henry Ward Beecher
Mischief all comes from too much opening of the mouth.
Misers mistake gold for good, whereas it is only a means of obtaining it. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Misery brings strange bedfellows.
Misery loves company Proverb
Misery loves company, but company does not reciprocate.
Misery loves company, but company does not reciprocate. Addison Mizner
Misery loves company.
Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.
Misery no longer loves company; nowadays it insists on it.
Misfortune shows those who are not friends. | Aristotle
Misfortune, and recited misfortune especially, may be prolonged to the point where it ceases to excite pity and arouses only irritation. Dorothy Parker
Misfortune.
Misfortune: The kind of fortune that never misses.
Misfortune: The kind of fortune that never misses.| Ambrose Bierce
Misfortunes always enter a door left open for them.
Misfortunes never come singly.
Mishaps are like knives, that either serve us or cut us, as we grasp them by the blade or the handle. James Russel Lowell
Mispelled? Impossible! My modem is error-correcting.
Miss, If you've lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?|Pick up line
Miss, n.: A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Missed it by  |  | <- That much !
Missed it by that much | Maxwell Smart
Missed it by that much| Maxewll Smart
Missing -- presumed married.
Missing keyboard - press F1
Misspelled?  Impossible.  My modem is error correcting.
Misster, do you vant to buy a duck?
Mistakes are oft the stepping stones to failure.
Mistakes are often the stepping stones to utter failure.
Mistakes are often the stepping stones to utter failure. Anonymous
Mistakes will happen, but don't give them too much help.
Misteaching: Telling one's grandmother how to suck eggs.
Mister Worf, show these children the airlock. Picard
Mister Worf, show these children the airlock. | Picard
Mister!  Here's your mule!
Mistrust first impulses, they are always good.
Mistrust the man who finds everything good; the man who finds everything evil; and still more the man who is indifferent to everything. Johann Kaspar Lavater
Mitchell's Law of Committees: Any simple problem can be made insoluble if enough meetings are held to discuss it.
Mob It is proof of a bad cause when it is applauded by the mob. Seneca
Mobius strippers have no rear end.
Mobius strippers never show you their back side.
Mockery is the weapon of those who have no other. Hubert Pierlot
Modem sex begins with a handshake.
Modem sex, the next best thing to being there.
Modem.... A deterrent to phone solicitors.
Modem: What landscapers do to dem lawns.
Modeming is an exercise of bits, bytes and bauds.
Modems are G-R-R-R-R-REAT!!!
Modems are proof that people enjoy torturing themsevles
Modems.....reach out and BYTE someone!
Modems...MOdulator DEModulator...MOney owDEd to Ma bell!
Moderate: Someone who's been mugged and indicted all in one day.
Moderation in all things, and moderation is the first to go.
Moderation in all things.
Moderation in temper is always a virtue; but moderation in principle is always a vice. Thomas Paine
Moderation is a fatal thing.  Nothing succeeds like excess.
Moderation is a fatal thing: nothing succeeds like excess. Oscar Wilde
Moderation is the inseparable companion of wisdom, but with it genius has not even a nodding acquaintance. Charles Caleb Colton
Modern business and persons and organizations that seek publicity must recognize their obligations to the public and to the press. Henry F. Woods, Jr.
Modern diplomats approach every problem with an open mouth. Arthur J. Goldberg
Modern man is the missing link between apes and human beings.
Modest doubt is called the beacon of the wise. William Shakespeare
Modesty antedates clothes and will be resumed when clothes are no more. Modesty died when clothes were born. Modesty died when false modesty was born. Mark Twain
Modesty is good bait when fishing for praise.
Modesty is not only an ornament, but also a guard to virtue. Joseph Addison
Modesty is the conscience of the body. Honor de Balzac
Modesty is the only sure bait when you angle for praise. Lord Chesterfield
Modesty may make a fool seem a man of sense. Jonathan Swift
Mollison's Bureaucracy Hypothesis: If an idea can survive a bureaucratic review and be implemented it wasn't worth doing.
Monday is a hard way to spend one-seventh of your life.
Monday is an awful way to spend one seventh of your life.
Monday is soon coming to a calendar near you !
Monday is the root of all evil
Monday, n.: In Christian countries, the day after the baseball game. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Mondays are a rotten way to spend a 7th of your life.
Mondays are the potholes in the road of life.
Money Can Make You Rich!
Money Not Found: Abort, Retry, break out Quicken?
Money can't buy happiness but it can certainly rent it for a couple of hours.
Money can't buy happiness, but allows a choice of misery.
Money can't buy happiness; it can, however, rent it. Anonymous
Money can't buy poverty -- you sort of have to earn it.
Money cannot buy happiness, but it can make you awfully comfortable while you're being miserable.
Money cannot buy love, nor even friendship.
Money does all things for reward. Some are pious and honest as long as they thrive upon it, but if the devil himself gives better wages, they soon change their party. Seneca
Money has no legs, but it runs.
Money is better than poverty if only for financial reasons.
Money is like a promise, easier made than kept.
Money is like a sixth sense, and you can't make use of the other five without it. W. Somerset Maugham
Money is like manure - it is meant to be spread around.
Money is like muck, Not good enough except to be spread.
Money is not required to buy one necessity of the soul. Henry David Thoreau
Money is round, it rolls away.
Money is the root of all evil - send $9.95 ..
Money is the root of all evil -- and a man needs roots.
Money is the root of all evil Proverb
Money is the root of all evil, and everyone needs roots.
Money is the root of all evil, and man needs roots
Money is the root of all evil, but man needs roots.
Money is the root of all evil. Send $20 for more information.
Money is the root of all evil; everyone needs roots!
Money is the root of all wealth.
Money is the sinews of both love and war.
Money isn't everything: It usually isn't enough.
Money lent to a friend must be recovered from an enemy.
Money makes not so many true friends as real enemies.
Money makes the world go around.
Money may buy friendship but money can not buy love.
Money often costs too much. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Money talks - mine always says goodbye.
Money talks - mine says "Goodbye"
Money talks! Mine just said goodbye!!
Money talks, anyone can understand it.
Money talks. Mine always says goodbye.
Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
Money will say more in one moment than the most eloquent lover can in years.
Money: A mint makes it first and we try to make it last.
Mongo only pawn in game of life.
Monogamy leaves a lot to be desired.
Monologue: A conversation between realtor and prospect.
Monopoly ? No, we just don't want competition. -- Intel
Monopoly? No, we just don't want competition.
Monotheism is a gift from the gods.
Monuments are the grappling-irons that bind one generation to another. Joseph Joubert
Mophobia, n.: Fear of being verbally abused by a Mississippian.
Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.
Moral passion without entertainment is propaganda, and entertainment without moral passion is television. Rita Mae Brown
Morality is a private and costly luxury.
More in the mind than the body this feeling.
More light! Goethe, last words Every absurdity has a champion to defend it. Oliver Goldsmith
More like Woody Woodpecker with a perm
More people are run down by gossip than by automobiles.
More persons, on the whole, are humbugged by believing in nothing than by believing in too much. P. T. Barnum
More than 3 fonts on that newsletter and you die !
More than any time in history, mankind now faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness, the other to total extinction.  Let us pray that we have the wisdom to choose correctly. | Woody Allen
Morfy's law - Enythink thit ken go rong willl.
Morning : cause for alarm.
Morning after pill for men - it changes your blood type.
Morning: cause for alarm
Moses dragged us for 40 years through the desert to bring us to the one place in the Middle East where there was no oil. Golda Meir
Moses supposes his toeses are roses, but Moses supposes erroneously.
Mosher's Law of Software Engineering: Don't worry if it doesn't work right.  If everything did, you'd be out of a job.
Most allies must be watched just like the enemy.
Most faults are not in our Constitution, but in ourselves. Ramsey Clark
Most gays have heterosexual parents.
Most great discoveries start with making a mistake.
Most human beings have an almost infinite capacity for taking things for granted. Aldous Huxley
Most ignorance is vincible ignorance. We don't know because we don't want to know. Aldous Huxley
Most men employ the first part of their life, to make the rest miserable.| de La Bruyere
Most men have died without creating; not one has died without destroying.
Most of our future lies ahead.
Most of our so-called reasoning consists in finding arguments for going on believing as we already do. James Robinson
Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no help at all. Dale Carnegie
Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all. Dale Carnegie
Most of the luxuries, and many of the so-called comforts of life, are not only indispensable, but positive hindrances to the elevation of mankind. Henry David Thoreau
Most of the things worth doing in the world had been declared impossible before they were done. Louis D. Brandeis
Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.
Most of us become parents long before we have stopped being children. Mignon McLaughlin
Most of us have been at work for several hours now.
Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand. Mark Twain
Most people are on the world, not in ithaving no conscious sympathy or relationship to anything about themundiffused, separate, and rigidly alone lilike marbles of polished stone, touching but separate. John Muir
Most people can'understand how othercan blow their noses differently than they do. Ivan Turgenev
Most people deserve each other.
Most people don't care what happens so long as it doesn't happen to them.
Most people have ears, but few have judgment; tickle those ears, and depend upon it, you will catch those judgments, such as they are. Lord Chesterfield
Most people raise their voice rather than reinforcing their point.
Most people repent their sins by thanking God they ain't so wicked as their neighbors. Josh Billings
Most people seek after what they do not possess and are enslaved by the very things they want to acquire. Anwar El-Sadat
Most people sell their souls and live with a good conscience on the proceeds. Logan P. Smith
Most people would rather die than think: many do. Bertrand Russell
Most people wouldn't know music if it came up and bit them on the ass. | Frank Zappa
Most political jokes get elected
Most subjects at universities are taught for no other purpose than that they may be retaught when the students become teachers. G. C. Lichtenberg
Most things get steadily worse.
Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother's tasted better the day before. Rita Rudner
Most vegetarians look so much like the food they eat that they can be classified as cannibals. Finley Peter Dunne
Most women do not want to be liberated from their essential natures as women. | Vice-President Dan Quayle
Most women set out to change a man, and when they have changed him they do not like him. Marlene Dietrich
Most writers regard truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are most economical in its use. Mark Twain
Mother Nature is a bitch.
Mother earth is not flat
Mother is the invention of necessity.
Mother told me to be good, but she's been wrong before.
Motherboard -  maternal parent listening to you tell her about your latest program.
Mount St. Helens should have used earth control.
Mountains come out of the sky and they stand there.
Mountains culminate in peaks, and nations in people.
Move to California - The police treat you like a King.
Move your vowels every day or you'll get consonated.
Movement To Ban Silly Tag Lines; Send Donations to:
Moving fast is not the same as going somewhere.
Mr Spock wears vulcanized rubbers.
Mr Worf Do you intend to blast a hole in the viewscreen?
Mr Worf... Fire at Will.. >BZZZT< ... Hey, where'd Riker go?
Mr. Bullfrog says: Time is fun when you're having flies.
Mr. Cole's Axiom: The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.
Mr. Sco*t G*t th*s* trib*les out*of m* ta*lin* n*w
Mr. Scott, energize.  Hey Where'd that pink bunny come from???
Mr. Worf fire pharsers at will! *ZAP* Hey where did Riker go?
Much may be done in those little shreds and patches of time, which every day produces, and which most men throw away, but which nevertheless will make at the end of it no small deduction for the life of man. C. C. Colton
Much of the wisdom of one age, is the folly of the next. Charles Simmons
Much smoking kills live men and cures dead swine. George D. Prentice
Multa ferunt anni venientes commoda secum, Multa recedentes adimiunt. (The years, as they come, bring many agreeable things with them; as they go, they take many away.) Horace, from Ars Poetica
Multi Edit. Triumph over insanity.
Multics is security spelled sideways.
Multitask- Make twice the mistakes in + the time.
Multitasking = 3 PCs and a chair with wheels!
Multitasking = screwing up several things at once.
Multitasking causes schizophrenia.
Multitasking causes schizophrenia..
Multitasking: Reading in the bathroom
Mum's the word.
Mumble.
Mumbling to himself, Picard figures out the cheese grater
Murder is just an extroverted suicide...
Murphy IS an optimist! Murphy LIVES !!!
Murphy is out there, waiting...
Murphy was an optimist.
Murphy was an optimist. O'Toole's Commentary
Murphy's Golden Rule:  Whoever has the gold makes the rules.
Murphy's Law doesn't apply to mee!!!!
Murphy's Law fails only when you try to demonstrate it.
Murphy's Law is recursive.  Washing your car to make it rain doesn't work.
Murphy's Law of Research: Enough research will tend to support your theory.
Muscles come and go; flab lasts. Bill Vaughan
Mushy peas & mint sauce hmmmmm
Music in the soul can be heard by the universe.
Music is a higher revelation than philosophy.| L. von Beethoven
Music is harmony, harmony is perfection, perfection is our dream, and our dream is heaven. Amiel
Music is the only language in which you cannot say a mean or sarcastic thing. Lord Erskine
Music is the universal language of mankind. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Music is well said to be the speech of angels. Thomas Carlyle
Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life. Berthold Auerbach
Musically, we are more talented than any Bob Dylan. Musically, we are more talented than Paul McCartney...I'm the new Elvis. Robert Pilatus, 'singer' in the musical group Milli Vanilli, 1990
Must Go - My Rotweiler needs its teeth sharpened.
Must Go - Our Rotweiler needs its teeth sharpened.
Must I hold a candle to my shames?
Mustgo, n.: Any item of food that has been sitting in the refrigerator so long it has become a science project. | Sniglets, "Rich Hall & Friends"
Mutability of temper and inconsistency with ourselves is the greatest weakness of human nature. Joseph Addison
My 386 does an infinite loop in 4.68 sec.
My AUTOEXEC.BAT is a vampire.
My Boss is a Jewish carpenter!
My Dog ate my REP Packet
My Go  amn keyboar   oesn't have any  's!
My God It's full of stars
My God They've gone to Plaid
My God can beat up YOUR god...
My God! It's full of stars!
My God, I'm depressed  Here I am, a computer with a mind a thousand times as powerful as yours, doing nothing but cranking out fortunes and sending mail about softball games.  And I've got this pain right through my ALU.  I've asked for it to be replaced, but nobody ever listens.  I think it would be better for us both if you were to just log out again.
My Guru told me there'd be lifetimes like this.
My Hard Disk went on a diet and lost it's FAT.
My Hovercraft is full of Eels.
My I.U.D. picks up Radio Windy.
My IBM mouse likes a MS.  She's no Genius.
My Karma ran over my dogma.
My Mother loves ME  It's the computer she hates.
My RAM's not what it used to be, so don't quote me.
My Twit Filter just put YOU on its Twit List!
My Twit Filter just put me on its Twit List!
My Universe - I hate party bashers......
My a burly person take exception to the way your face is arranged.
My advice to you concerning applause is this: enjoy it but never quite believe it. Robert Montgomery
My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy the ice cream while it's on your plate.. Thornton Wilder
My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it's on your platethat's my philosophy. Thornton Wilder
My aim is to put down on paper what I see and what I feel in the best and simplest way. Ernest Hemingway
My ambition is to do a good job. I never plan anything. Ilie Nastase, former professional tennis player, running for mayor of Bucharest, Romania, 1996
My appetite comes to me while eating. Michel de Montaigne
My best friend is a social worker.
My body's a temple zoned for toxic waste.
My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wineeverybody drinks water. Mark Twain
My boss is tempermental. 50% temper and 50% mental.
My brain hurts
My brain hurts!
My brain operation was considered minor surgery.
My cat has 9 lives, but my frog croaks daily!
My childhood should have taught me lessons for my own parenthood, but it didn't because parenting can be learned only by people who have no children. Bill Cosby, actor, author and commedian, from Childhood, 1991
My computer NEVER loc
My computer can beat up your computer.
My computer has a terminal illness
My computer has a virus and can't call in to work today.
My computer never locks u
My computer puts out.
My computer's sick and I think my modem is a carrier.
My computer's sick, I think my modem's a carrier
My computer's sick. I think my modem is a carrier.
My couch potato routine honed to perfection
My country right or wrong; when right, to keep her right; when wrong, to put her right. Carl Schurz
My cup hath runneth'd over with love.
My dad and I are siamese twins.
My dad hit me only once - with the Buick
My damm m key is brokem, mo I meam m key, mot m
My darkness has been filled with the light of intelligence, and behold, the outer day-lit world was stumbling and groping in social blindness. Helen Keller
My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments. Stephen Wright
My dog has no nose.
My experience in government is that when things are non-controversial and beautifully coordinated, there is not much going on. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
My fallacies are more logical than your fallacies.
My family history begins with me, but yours ends with you.
My father didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. Clarence Buddinton Kelland
My father must have had some elementary education for he could read and write and keep accounts inaccurately. George Bernard Shaw
My favorite mythical creature?  The honest politician.
My foolish parents taught me to read and write.
My friend Winnie is a procrastinator. He didn't get his birthmark until he was eight years old. Stephen Wright
My friend has a baby. I'm writing down all the noises the baby makes so later I can ask him what he meant. Stephen Wright
My friends, no matter how rough the road may be, we can and we will never, never surrender to what is right. Vice President Dan Quayle
My generation, faced as it grew with a choice between religious belief and existential despair, chose marijuana. Now we are in our Cabernet stage. Peggy Noonan, speech writer for presidents Reagan and Bush, 1996
My girlfriend and I went on a picnic. I don't know how she did it, but she got poison ivy on the brain. When it itched, the only way she could scratch it was to think about sandpaper. Stephen Wright
My girlfriend does her nails with white-out. When she's asleep, I go over there and write misspelled words on them. Stephen Wright
My grandfather gave me a watch. It doesn't have any hands or numbers. He says it's very accurate. I asked him what time it was. You can guess what he told me. Stephen Wright
My grandfather invented Cliff's Notes. It all started back in 1912...Well, to make a long story short... Stephen Wright
My grandfather once told me that there were two kinds of people: those who do the work and those who take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was much less competition. Indira Gandhi
My grandkids say, 'Reality Bites.' O.K., but it also challenges and rewards...I believe our best days are yet to come. George Bush, US president, College of William and Mary Graduation, 1995
My greatest enemy is reality. I have fought it successfully for thirty years. Margaret Anderson
My hat covers my head... Just like hair used to!
My hat covers my head.... Just like hair used to
My haystack had no needle
My haystack had no needle!
My head is sore, and there's a hole in the brick wall!
My heart that was rapt away by the wild cherry blossoms will it return to my body when they scatter? Kotomichi
My hopes are not always realized, but I always hope. Ovid
My horse got shot, so I had to break his leg...
My house is made out of balsa wood. When no one is home across the street, except the little kids, I out and lift my house up over my head. I tell them to stay out of my yard or I'll throw it at them. Stephen Wright
My house is on the median strip of a highway. You don't really notice, except I have to leave the driveway doing 60 MPH. Stephen Wright
My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. Rita Rudner
My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck
My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me. Benjamin Disraeli
My inferiority complexes aren't as good as yours.
My initial response was to sue her for defamation of character, but then I realized that I had no character. Charles Barkley, on hearing Tonya Harding proclaim herself 'the Charles Barkley of figure skating', 1994
My interest is in the future because I am going to spend the rest of my life there.
My interest is in the future because I am going to spend the rest of my life there. Charles F. Kettering
My karma ran over my dogma
My karma ran over your dogma.|Bumper sticker
My kingdom for a beer; half my beer for a woman.
My last original thought died of loneliness.
My lawyer can beat up your lawyer !
My life has a superb cast, but I can't figure out the plot.
My life is not organized around high probability events.
My life may be strange, but at least it's not boring
My lord, I have a cunning plan...
My love, he's mad, and my love, he's fleet, And a wild young wood-thing bore him The ways are fair to his roaming feet, And the skies are sunlit for him. As sharply sweet to my heart he seems As the fragrance of acacia. My own dear love, he is all my dreams -- 	And I wish he were in Asia. | Dorothy Parker
My lucky colour just faded.
My machine will do lunch with yours.
My mama done tol' me...
My message above.  Your response here ____________.
My mind ain't so open that anything can crawl right in.
My mind is closed so my body speaks
My mind is incapable of conceiving such a thing as a soul. I may be in error, and man may have a soul; but I simply do not believe it. Thomas A. Edison
My mind is my own church. Thomas Paine
My mistakes are purely erroneous.
My modem can beat up your modem.
My modem isn't slow- it's "baudily challenged"
My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me. Sir Winston Churchill
My most fervent prayer is to be a President who can make it possible for every boy in this land to grow to manhood by loving his countryinstead of dying for it. Lyndon Baines Johnson
My mother invented me. My father denies!
My mother is NEVER on time | Worf
My mother was the tour guide for Guilt Trips...
My motto is: Contented with little, yet wishing for more. Charles Lamb
My mouse only has one ball....
My natural exuberance spills out all over the place.
My nature is subdued to what it works in, like the dyer's hand. William Shakespeare
My neighbor has a circular driveway...he can't get out. Stephen Wright
My only concern was to get home after a hard day's work. Rosa Parks
My only cow died, so I don't need your bull.
My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.
My other brain's a schizofrenic.
My other brain's an Einstein.
My other car is a broom!
My other car is an Edsel.
My other computer has Lwaxana Troi's voice.
My other computer is a +4...
My other computer is a Cray
My other computer is a HoloDeck(tm).
My other computer is a Pentium.
My other computer is a SUN SPARCstation
My other computer is a VAX.
My other computer is a abacus.
My other computer is an IMSAI....
My other computer is even slower.
My other tag line is a killer!
My other tagline is a Porsche.
My other vehicle is a Galaxy Class Starship ...
My other vehicle is a Galaxy Class Starship...
My other vehicle is a Romulan Warbird...
My own dear love, he is strong and bold And he cares not what comes after. His words ring sweet as a chime of gold, And his eyes are lit with laughter. He is jubilant as a flag unfurled -- Oh, a girl, she'd not forget him. My own dear love, he is all my world -- 	And I wish I'd never met him. | Dorothy Parker
My pessimism goes to the point of suspecting the sincerity of the pessimists. Edmond Rostand
My precept to all who build is, that the owner should be an ornament to the house, and not the house to the owner. Cicero
My problem is reconciling my gross habits with my net income.
My psycho-analyst is going to be out of a job.
My rabbit's just turned into frogs, they croaked.
My reality check just bounced.
My riches consist not in the extent of my possessions, but in the fewness of my wants. J. Brotherton
My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere. Stephen Wright
My school colors were clear. We used to say, 'I'm not naked, I'm in the band.' Stephen Wright
My spelbng is perfecf bnt I ansmer wail om my Apble Newtom!
My stereo's -fixed, said Tom monotonously.
My system goes down more often than a $10 whore.
My systems are only programmed for one at a time. | Data
My tagline can beat up your tagline!
My tagline is in the shop. This is a loaner.
My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed. Christopher Morley
My third pet is .BATty; my fourth is MOUSEY.
My train of thought is a Mag-Lev.
My weight is perfect for my height... which varies.
My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.
My wife gives good headache.
My wife left me. There IS a God.
My wife or my modem? Gee, I'll miss her....
My wife's other car is a BROOM!
Mystery and innocence are not akin. Hosea Ballou
Mystery is another name for our ignorance; if we were omniscient, all would be perfectly plain. Tryon Edwards
Mystery is the wisdom of blockheads. Horace Walpole
Mythology, n.: The body of a primitive people's beliefs concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities and so forth, as distinguished from the true accounts which it invents later. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
NAESER'S LAW: You can make it foolproof, but you can't make it damnfoolproof.
NAK NAK  Who's there?  #E)  NO CARRIER
NASA: There's no such thing as a free launch.
NASCAR -- Where speed excells!
NATION, A society united by its ancestry and by common hatred of its neighbors. W.R. Inge
NAVY: Never Again Volunteer Yourself
NETWORK: What fishermen do when not fishing.
NEVER tug on Kira's ear ring to get her attention!
NEWS FLASH Today the East German pole-vault champion became the West German pole-vault champion.
NEWS FLASH: Virus Author offers free upgrades to registered users.
NEWTON'S LAW: A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.
NEWTON'S SEVENTH LAW: A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.
NIGHT OF THE ZOMBIE MODEMS !
NO !
NO CARRIER... Naval pilot's worst nightmare!
NO MORE BU__ SH__
NO, I _don't_ do WINDOWS !
NOW I've put my ear in it!
NOW, you can press the other key to continue...
NUMBER CRUNCHING:  Jumping on a Computer.
Naaah, real men don't read docs.
Nadie tiene ms imaginacin que la realidad.
Naeser's Law: You can make it foolproof, but you can't make it damnfoolproof.
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Nanosecond: Mork's stunt man.
Nanu nanu
Nanu nanu!
National hatred is something peculiar. You will always find it strongest and most violent where there is the lowest degree of culture. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
National security is in your hands - guard it well.
Nationalism is an infantile disease. It is the measles of mankind. Albert Einstein
Nations have recently been led to borrow billions for war; no nation has ever borrowed largely for education. Probably, no nation is rich enough to pay for both war and civilization. We must make our choice; we cannot have both. Abraham Flexner
Nato Ergo Sum
Natural abilities are like natural plants; they need pruning by study. Francis Bacon
Nature ALWAYS sides with hidden flaws.
Nature abhors a vacuous experimenter.
Nature abhors a vacuum, and if I can only walk with sufficient carelessness I am sure to be filled. Henry David Thoreau
Nature always sides with the hidden flaw !
Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
Nature and nature's laws lay hid in night, God said, "Let Newton be," and all was light. It did not last; the devil howling "Ho Let Einstein be" restored the status quo.
Nature creates ability; luck provides it with opportunity. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Nature does not complete things. She is chaotic. Man must finish, and he does so by making a garden and building a wall. Robert Frost
Nature does nothing uselessly. |   Aristotle
Nature encourages no looseness, pardons no errors. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Nature gives you the face you have at twenty. Life shapes the face you have at thirty. But at fifty you get the face you deserve. Coco Chanel
Nature has color-coded groups of individuals so that statistically reliable predictions of their adaptability to intellectually rewarding and effective lives can easily be made and profitably be used by the pragmatic man in the street. William Shockley
Nature is an infinite sphere whose center is everywhere and whose circumference is nowhere. Blaise Pascal
Nature knows no pause in progress and development, and attaches her curse on all inaction. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Nature magically suits a man to his fortunes, by making them the fruit of his character. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Nature makes merit, and fortune puts it to work. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Nature will bear the closest inspection. She invites us to lay our eye level with her smallest leaf, and take an insect view of its plain. Henry David Thoreau
Nature, like people sometimes weeps for gladness.
Nature, to be commanded, must be obeyed.
Navy, Just Another Adventure by Milton Bradley
Navy, not just a job, but an adventure.
Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power. Abraham Lincoln
Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power. | Abraham Lincoln
Nearly everyone is in favor of going to heaven but too many are hoping they'll live long enough to see an easing of the entrance requirements. Anonymous
Necessity has no law.
Necessity has no law. Benjamin Franklin
Necessity is a mother.
Necessity is blind until it becomes conscious. Freedom is the consciousness of necessity. Karl Marx
Necessity is the mother of invention Proverb
Necessity is the mother of invention.
Necessity is the mother of invention. Jonathan Swift
Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves. William Pitt
Necessity knows no law except to conquer. Publilius Syrus
Need a hat and thigh-high BOOTS for that one!
Neestiko arkoudi dhen horevee.
Negative expectations yield negative results.
Negative expectations yield negative results. Positive expectations yield negative results. Non-Reciprocal Law of Expectations
Negligence is the rust of the soul, that corrodes through all her best resolves. Owen Felltham
Neil Armstrong tripped
Neil Armstrong tripped.
Neither a burrower nor a lentil bee. | Wm. Snakespeare
Neither a wise nor a brave man lies down on the tracks of history to wait for the train of the future to run over him., from a Presidential campaign speech, Time Magazine, 10/6/52 Dwight D. Eisenhower
Neither man nor God is going to tell me what to write. James T. Farrell
Neither spread the germs of gossip nor encourage others to do so.
Neither the poor nor the rich may sleep under bridges or beg in the streets.
Nepotism is relational.
Neurosis is the inability to tolerate ambiguity. Sigmund Freud
Neurotic: Self-taut person.
Neutral men are the devil's allies. Edwin Hubbel Chapin
Neutrality, as a lasting principle, is an evidence of weakness. Lajos Kossuth
Neutron - Tron 2, the movie.
Never "assume" or you'll make an "ass" of "u" and "me".
Never a lip is curved with pain That can't be kissed into smiles again. Bret Harte
Never a ship sails out of bay but carries my heart as a stowaway. Roselle Mercier Montgomery
Never a victim without retribution!!
Never advise anyone to go to war or to marry. Spanish Proverb
Never agree with me, it shakes my self confidence.
Never appeal to a man's 'better nature'. He might not have one. Anonymous
Never argue with a fool - people might not know the difference.
Never argue with a fool.  People might not know the difference.
Never argue with a six-year-old who shaves.
Never argue with a woman when she's tired, or rested.
Never argue with anyone who buys ink by the gallon.
Never argue; repeat your assertion Robert Owen If you don't try to win you might as well hold the olympics in somebody's back yard. Jesse Owens
Never ascribe to malice that which can adequately be explained by stupidity. Anonymous
Never ask a question unless the answer makes a difference.
Never ask for a pardon before you have been accused.
Never ask of money spent Where the spender thinks it went. Nobody was ever meant To remember or invent What he did with every cent. Robert Frost
Never assume.  It makes an "ass" out of "u" and "me".
Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity. Hanlon's Razor
Never attribute to malice what can be explained by simple stupidity!
Never attribute to malice what is adequately explained by stupidity.
Never be led astray onto the path of virtue.
Never be so brief as to become obscure. Tryon Edwards
Never before have so few puked so much on so many.
Never before have so many been taken for so much and left with so little. Van Panopoulos
Never buy what you do not want, because it is cheap; it will be dear to you. Thomas Jefferson.
Never call a man a fool.  Borrow from him.
Never call a man a fool; borrow from him.
Never call a man fool when you can borrow money from him instead.
Never chase a lie. Let it alone, and it will run itself to death. I can work out a good character much faster than anyone can lie me out of it. Lyman Beecher
Never complain and never explain. Benjamin Disraeli
Never contend with a man who has nothing to lose. Baltasar Gracian.
Never count your chickens before they rip your lips off
Never count your chickens before they rip your lips off.
Never dare to judge until you've heard all. | Euripides
Never deal with a beggar, it's bad for profits.
Never do anything standing that you can do sitting, or anything sitting that you can do lying down. Chinese Proverb
Never do anything twice that you don't have to do at all.
Never do today what you can put off till tomorrow. Delay may give clearer light as to what is best to be done. Aaron Burr
Never do today what you can put off until tomorrow.
Never does the human soul appear so strong as when it foregoes revenge and dares to forgive an injury. Edwin Hubbel Chapin
Never doubt that a small, group of thoughtful, committrf citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. Margaret Mead
Never doubt the word of another Ferengi. Just don't trust it.
Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you
Never draw your dirk when a blow will do it. Scottish Proverb
Never drink coke in a moving elevator.  The elevator's motion coupled with the chemicals in coke produce hallucinations.  People tend to change into lizards and attack without warning, and large bats usually fly in the window.  Additionally, you begin to believe that elevators have windows.
Never drink from your finger bowl - it contains only water.
Never drink from your finger bowl -- it contains only water.
Never drink from your finger bowl--it contains only water.
Never drink whisky on an empty ulcer!
Never eat anything at one sitting that you can't lift. Miss Piggy (Muppet character, by Jim Henson/Frank Oz)
Never eat at a place called Mom's.
Never eat in a place with sliding doors unless you're crazy about raw fish.
Never eat more than you can lift.
Never eat more than you can lift. | Miss Piggy
Never eat yellow snow!
Never enough time, unless you're serving it.
Never enter a battle of wits unarmed.
Never explain. Your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway. Elbert Hubbard
Never express yourself more clearly than you think. Niels Bohr
Never face facts; if you do you'll never get up in the morning. Marlo Thomas
Never fall out with your bread and butter. English Proverb
Never feed your cat anything that clashes with the carpet!
Never fight an inanimate object., P. J. O'Rourke
Never fight with a bear in his own cave.
Never forget: 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.
Never get angry. Never make a threat. Reason with People Don Corleone from The Godfather by Mario Puzo Sunburn is very becoming - but only when it is even - one must be careful not to look like a mixed grill. Noel Coward
Never get between a fat guy and the candy machine.
Never get married in the morning, 'cause you may never know who you'll meet that night. Paul Hornung
Never give a gun to ducks.
Never give a man up until he has failed at something he likes. Lewis E. Lawes
Never give advice in a crowd. Arab Proverb
Never give advice unless asked. German Proverb
Never give an inch
Never give an inch!
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. Erma Bombeck
Never go to bed with anybody crazier than you are.
Never go to sea with two chronometres, take one or three.
Never go with the odds
Never have a companion that casts you in the shade. Baltasar Gracian
Never hit a man with glasses.  Hit him with a baseball bat.
Never hit a man with glasses.  Use your fist!
Never hit a man with glasses; hit him with your fist.
Never hold anyone by the button or the hand in order to be heard out; for if people are unwilling to hear you, you had better hold your tongue than them. Lord Chesterfield
Never hold discussions with the monkey when the organ grinder is in the room. Winston Churchill
Never insult an alligator until you've crossed the river.
Never invest in anything that eats or needs repairing. Billy Rose
Never invest money is something that needs feeding or repainting.
Never joke with the ignorant. They take it seriously and think you're crazy.
Never judge a book by its movie.
Never judge a book by its movie. J.W. Eagan
Never judge a book by its movie., J.W. Eagan
Never judge a man by his taglines.
Never judge a work of art by its defects. Washington Allston
Never kick a man unless he's down.
Never lean forward to push an invisible object.
Never leave that till tomorrow which you can do today. Benjamin Franklin
Never lend books, for no one ever returns them. The only books I have in my library are books that other folks have leant me. Anatole France
Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. Erma Bombeck, author
Never let a fool kiss you, or a kiss fool you.
Never let a machine know you're in a hurry.
Never let the facts get in the way of a good story!
Never let the fear of striking out get in your way. Babe Ruth
Never let your feet run faster than your shoes.
Never let your sense of morals interfere with doing the right thing.
Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.
Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right. | Salvor Hardin, "Foundation"
Never let your studies interfere with your education.
Never let your zeal outrun your charity. The former is but human, the latter is divine. Hosea Ballou
Never lie unless you have an awfully good memory.
Never lose your sense of the superficial.
Never make anything simple and efficient when a way can be found to make it complex and wonderful.
Never make forecasts, especially about the future. Samuel Goldwyn
Never mind the facts - I know what I know.
Never mind whom you praise, but be very careful who you blame. Edmund Gosse
Never moon a werewolf...
Never murder a man who is committing suicide. Woodrow Wilson
Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance. |Sam Brown, "The Washington Post", January 26, 1977
Never open the door to a lesser evil, for other and greater ones invariably slink in after it.. Baltasar Gracian.
Never park your hard disk in a tow-away zone.
Never play cards with a man called Doc.
Never play cards with a man named Doc, and never eat at a place called Mom's. John O'Hara
Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.|Bumper sticker
Never practice two vices at once. Tallulah Bankhead
Never praise a sister to a sister in the hope of your compliments reaching the proper ears. Rudyard Kipling
Never promise more than you can perform.
Never promise more than you can perform. Publius Syrus
Never put off 'til tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.
Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid all together.
Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid doing entirely.
Never put off till tomorrow what you can ignore entirely.
Never put off to tomorrow what you can do today Proverb
Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can put off indefinitely. Anonymous
Never raise your hand to your children; it leaves your midsection unprotected. Robert Orben
Never refuse any advance of friendship, for if nine out of ten bring you nothing, one alone may repay you. Madame de Tencin
Never rely on the glory of the morning or the smiles of your mother-in-law. Japanese Proverb
Never replace a successful experiment.
Never replicate a successful experiment.
Never run into debt, not if you can find anything else to run into. Josh Billings
Never say anything more predictive than "Watch this!"
Never say anything more predictive than "Watch this"
Never say you know a man till you have divided an inheritance with him. Johann Kaspar Lavater
Never say you know a man until you have divided an inheritance with him.
Never say you know someone until you have divided an inheritance.
Never settle with words what you can accomplish with a flame thrower.
Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you are. Murphy's First Military Law
Never shove your granny while she's shaving.
Never slap a child in the face - there are plenty of other places.
Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself.
Never sleep with anyone whose troubles are worse than your own.
Never smirk at the judge..
Never spend your money before you have it. Thomas Jefferson
Never squat with your spurs on. Texan Proverb
Never stand begging for what you have the power to earn. Miguel de Cervantes
Never stand between a dog and a fire hydrant!
Never stand between a fire hydrant and a dog.
Never step in anything soft.
Never take a beer to a job interview.
Never take a drink when you are feeling sorry for yourself.
Never take anything for granted. Benjamin Disraeli
Never take the advice of someone who has not had your kind of trouble. Sidney J. Harris
Never tell a man you can read him through and through; most people prefer to be thought enigmas. Marchioness Townsend
Never tell a secret to a bride or a groom; wait until they have been married longer. Ed Howe
Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity. George S. Patton, Jr.
Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do, and they will surprise you with their ingenuity. George S. Patton, US General
Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it. Mark Twain
Never test for an error condition you don't know how to	handle.|
Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle.
Never test for an error you don't know how to handle.
Never throw a bird at a dragon.
Never throw mud. You may miss your mark, but you will have dirty hands. Joseph Parker
Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you!
Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you. American Proverb
Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you. Anonymous
Never trust a Ferengi who smiles when he pays.
Never trust a computer bigger than you can lift.
Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. -- Steve Wozniak
Never trust a man who can count to 1,023 on his fingers
Never trust a man who speaks well of everybody. John Churton Collins
Never trust a person who says : Trust Me !
Never trust a skinny cook.
Never trust anyone who speaks well of everyone.
Never trust free advice.
Never trust the advice of a man in difficulties. Aesop
Never trust the man who tells you all his troubles but keeps from you all his joys. Jewish Proverb
Never try to outstubborn a cat.
Never try to outstubborn a cat. | Lazarus Long, "Time Enough for Love"
Never try to reason the predjudice out of a man. It wasn't reasoned into him, and cannot be reasoned out. Sydney Smith
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and bothers the pig.
Never underestimate a woman.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do.
Never use a long word when a diminutive one'll do.
Never use a preposition to end a sentence with.
Never use an elevator in a building that has been hit by a nuclear bomb.
Never use an elevator in a building that has been hit by a nuclear bomb; use the stairs. | Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
Never use intuition. Omar Bradley
Never use no double negatives.
Never utilise a sesquipedalien word when an intuitive diminutive  will suffice.
Never violate the sacredness of your individual self-respect. Theodore Parker
Never vote for a politican that says "I can't".
Never vote for the best candidate, vote for the one who will do the least harm. Frank Dane
Never wear anything that panics the cat.
Never worry about the bullet with your name on it. Instead, worry about shrapnel addressed to 'occupant'. Murphy's Tenth Military Law
Never worry about theory as long as the machinery does what it's supposed to do. | R. A. Heinlein
Never write a letter while you are angry. Chinese Proverb
Never, ever use repetitive redundancies.
New Book:  _How to write a How To book_
New Highway gets Railroaded.
New Mexico?  Sorry, we don't do ship to foreign countries
New UNIX/TS manuals available in 2F-101.
New Year's Eve is the time of year when a man most feels his age, and his wife most often reminds him to act it. | Webster's Unafraid Dictionary
New Years' Resolution-perhaps I might get more decisive, I dunno.
New York is real.  The rest is done with mirrors.
New York's got the ways and means; Just won't let you be. | The Grateful Dead
New book: 101 Ways to Brown-Nose to Success.
New campaign promise:  Babble fish for all
New crypt.  See /usr/news/crypt.
New financial propositions may be offered at the turn of the year.
New mail not found. Start whine pout sequence? (Y/N)
New members are urgently needed in the Society for Prevention of Cruelty to Yourself.  Apply within.
New strain of system-trashing virus : WINDOWS
New systems generate new problems.
Newlan's Truism: An "acceptable" level of unemployment means that the government economist to whom it is acceptable still has a job.
News Flash: World to end at 10:00! News at 11.
Newsbytes - Microsoft announce EDLIN for Windows.
Newton's Fourth Law:  Every action has an equal and opposite satisfaction.
Newton's Little-Known Seventh Law: A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.
Newton's law: Sitting under apple trees causes headaches.
Next Friday will not be your lucky day.  As a matter of fact, you don't have a lucky day this year.
Next Wednesday you will be presented with a great opportunity.
Next time you wave, use ALL of your fingers!!
Next time you wave, use all your fingers.
Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is really quite as satisfying as an income tax refund. | F. J. Raymond
Next to ingratitude the most painful thing to bear is gratitude. Henry Ward Beecher
Next to the originator of a good sentence is the first quoter of it. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Next to the very young, the very old are the most selfish. William Makepeace Thackeray
Nibbles, bits, bytes....great hobby for a dieter, huh?!?
Nice computers don't go down.
Nice guys get sick.
Nice landing.  Next time, put the wheels down first.
Nice shoes.  Wanna f*ck?|Pick up line
Nice tits.  Mind if I feel them?|Pick up line
Nickel: Once good for getting the wrong number with.
Nicknames stick to people, and the most ridiculous are the most adhesive. Thomas C. Haliburton
Nietzche is pietzche, but Sartre is smartre.
Night falls when the street lights turn on.  Swedish Law.
Night of the living dead chipmunks
Night time is really the best time to work. All the ideas are there to be yours because everyone else is asleep. Catherine O'Hara
Nightowls are _real_ people.
Nihilism doesn't exist.
Nihilism should commence with oneself.
Niklaus Wirth has lamented that, whereas Europeans pronounce his name correctly (Ni-klows Virt), Americans invariably mangle it into (Nick-les Worth).  Which is to say that Europeans call him by name, but Americans call him by value.
Nil taurus excretum.  No El Toro Poopoo either!
Nine times out of ten the statisticians are wrong.
Nine-tenths of wisdom consists in being wise in time. Theodore Roosevelt
Ninety per cent of everything is crap.
Ninety-Ninety Rule of Project Schedules: The first ninety percent of the task takes ninety percent of the time, and the last ten percent takes the other ninety percent.
Ninety-nine percent of the failures come from people who have the habit of making excuses. George Washington Carver
Ninety-seven percent responded that they did. Anonymous
Ninty percent of the politicians give the other ten pervent a bad name. Henry Kissinger
Nitpicking:  Not just a hobby, it's a way of life!
Nitrate:  Lower than the day rate.
Nixon's Principal: If 2 wrongs don't make a right, try 3.
No  No  Nurse  I said "prick his boil"
No Condo, No MBA, No BMW, No Clever Tagline
No Credit, Bad Credit? No Problem. No Money?  Problem.
No Credit? No Problem.  Bad Credit? No Problem.
No Money?  Problem.
No Mr Bond. I expect you to die| Goldfinger
No Tagline available at this time.
No Worf...The holodeck won't run Doom.
No action will be considered blameless, unless the will was so, for by the will the act was dictated. Seneca
No amount of artificial reinforcement can offset the natural inequalities of human individuals. Henry P. Fairchild
No amount of careful planning will ever replace dumb luck.
No amount of genius can overcome a preoccupation with detail.
No amount of genius can overcome a preoccupation with detail. Levy's Eighth Law
No amount of planning will replace dumb luck.
No amount of poor schooling can spoil a good student.
No analysis is a complete failure - it can always serve as a bad example.
No answer is also an answer.
No author ever drew a character consistent to human nature, but he was forced to ascribe to it many inconsistencies. Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton
No bathroom? Just boldly go where no man has gone before
No battle plan has ever survived contact with the enemy.
No bird has ever uttered note That was not in some first bird's throat; Since Eden's freshness and man's fall No rose has been original. Thomas Bailey Aldrich
No brain is stronger than its weakest think. Thomas L. Masson
No business which depends for existence on paying less than living wages to its workers has any right to continue in this country. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
No call alligator long mouth till you pass him. Jamaican Proverb
No clock is more regular than the belly. Rabelais
No condo, no MBA, no BMW ...
No culture can live, if it attempts to be exclusive. Mahatma Gandhi
No decorations necessary.
No degree of dullness can safeguard a work against the determination of critics to find it facinating. Harold Rosenberg
No degree of knowledge attainable by man is able to set him above the want of hourly assistance. Samuel Johnson
No directory.
No doubt Jack the Ripper excused himself on the grounds that it was human nature.
No ear can hear nor tongue can tell the tortures of the inward hell! Lord Byron
No entertainment is so cheap as reading, nor any pleasure so lasting. Mary Wortley Montagu
No evil is without its compensation. The less money, the less trouble; the less favor, the less envy. Even in those cases which put us out of wits, it is not the loss itself, but the estimate of the loss that troubles us. Seneca
No executive ever devotes any effort to proving himself wrong.
No experiment is reproducible.
No experiment is reproducible. Wyszowski's Law
No falsehood lingers into old age.  | Sophocles (406 BC)
No fool can be silent at a feast. Solon
No fools are so troublesome as those who have some wit. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
No free lunch in an ecosystem.
No gain is so certain as that which proceeds from the economical use of what you already have. Latin Proverb
No generalization is wholly true, not even this one.
No good deed goes unpunished.
No good deed goes unpunished. Clare Booth Luce
No good deed goes unpunished. | Clare Boothe Luce
No good work whatever can be perfect, and the demand for perfection is always a sign of a misunderstanding of the ends of art. John Ruskin
No great genius is without an admixture of madness. Aristotle
No great scoundrel is ever uninteresting.
No historian can take part withor againstthe forces he has to study. To him even the extinction of the human race should merely be a fact to be grouped with other vital statistics. Henry Brooks Adams
No honest man ever repented of his honesty.
No human thing is of serious importance. |   Plato
No it isn't
No it isn't!
No job is so small it doesn't require all your tools
No law can be sacred to me but that of my nature. Ralph Waldo Emerson
No law reaches it, but all right-minded people observe it. Chamfort
No main() No Gain !
No man acquires property without acquiring with it a little arithmetic also. Ralph Waldo Emerson
No man can be a patriot on an empty stomach.
No man can think clearly when his fists are clenched. George Jean Nathan
No man ever did a designed injury to another, but at the same time he did a greater to himself. Lord Kames
No man ever prayed heartily without learning something. Ralph Waldo Emerson
No man has a good enough memory to make a successful liar. Abraham Lincoln
No man has a good enough memory to make a successful liar.| Abraham Lincoln
No man has a right in America to treat any other man 'tolerantly' for tolerance is the assumption of superiority. Our liberties are equal rights of every citizen. Wendell L. Willkie
No man has a right to do what he pleases, except when he pleases to do right. Charles Simmons
No man is a fool always, but all men are fools sometimes.
No man is above the law and no man below it. Theodore Roosevelt
No man is an island entire of itself; every man is part of the main ... Any man's death diminishes me because I am involved in mankind, and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee. John Donne
No man is an island, but some of us are long peninsulas.
No man is an island, but some of us are long peninsulas.
No man is entitled to the blessings of freedom unless he be vigilant in its preservation. Douglas MacArthur
No man is esteemed for gay garments but by fools and women. Sir Walter Raleigh
No man is free who is not a master of himself. Epictetus
No man is free who is not master of himself. Epictetus
No man is good enough to govern another man without that other's consent. Abraham Lincoln
No man is happy without a delusion of some kind. Delusions are as necessary to our happiness as realities. Christian Nestell Bovee
No man is hurt but by himself Diogenes
No man is justified in doing evil on the ground of expediency. Theodore Roosevelt
No man is lonely while eating spaghetti - it requires so much attention.
No man is more unhappy than the one who is never in adversity; the greatest affliction of life is never to be afflicted. Anonymous
No man is rich enough to buy back his past.
No man is so foolish but he may sometimes give another good counsel, and no man so wise that he may not easily err if he takes no other counsel than his own. He that is taught only by himself has a fool for a master. Ben Jonson
No man is so poor as to have nothing worth giving. Henry Wadsworth Lonfellow
No man is such a conquerer as the man who has defeated himself. Henry Ward Beecher
No man is worth his salt who is not ready at all times to risk his body, to risk his well-being, to risk his life in a great cause. Theodore Roosevelt
No man knows what true happiness is until he gets married. By then, of course, its too late. Anonymous
No man likes to have his intelligence or good faith questioned, especially if he has doubts about it himself. Henry Brooks Adams
No man loves life like him that's growing old. | Sophocles
No man needs a vacation so much as the man who has just had one. Elbert Hubbard
No man really becomes a fool until he stops asking questions. Charles Steinmetz
No man should think himself a zero, and think he can do nothing about the state of the world. Bernard M. Baruch
No man that does not see visions will ever realize any high hope or undertake any high enterprise. Woodrow Wilson
No man was ever endowed with a right without being at the same time saddled with a responsibility. Gerald W. Johnson
No man who is in a hurry is quite civilized. Will Durant
No man who is occupied in doing a very difficult thing, and doing it very well, ever loses his self-respect. George Bernard Shaw
No man will ever bring out of the Presidency the reputation which carries him into it. Thomas Jefferson
No man's credit is as good as his money. Ed Howe
No man's life, liberty or property are safe while the Legislature is in session. Gideon J. Tucker
No man, however strong, can serve ten years as schoolmaster, priest, or Senator, and remain fit for anything else. Henry Brooks Adams
No man, who continues to add something to the material, intellectual and moral well-being of the place in which he lives, is left long without proper reward. Booker T. Washington
No mans error becomes his own Law; nor obliges him to persist in it. Thomas Hobbes
No matter how big or soft or warm your bed is, you still have to get out of it. Grace Slick
No matter how hard you shop for an item, after you bought it, you will find it on sale.
No matter how much you do, you'll never do enough.
No matter how old a mother is she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement. Florida Scott Maxwell
No matter how thin you slice it, it's still baloney.
No matter how well you do your job, a superior will seek to modify the results.
No matter how you slice it, it's still a golf ball
No matter what goes wrong, it will probably look right !
No matter what goes wrong, it will probably look right.
No matter what happens, someone always knew it would.
No matter what occurs, someone believes it happened according to his pet theory
No matter what the experiment's result, there will always be someone eager to: (a) misinterpret it. (b) fake it. or (c) believe it supports his own pet theory. Finagle's Second Law
No matter what they SAY, size IS important!
No matter where you go, there you are.
No matter where you go, there you are.  - B. Bonzai
No matter where you go, there you are. Go see yourself!
No matter where you go, there you are. Right here.
No matter which way you ride, it's uphill and against the wind. First Law of Bicycling
No matter which way you spit, it's up wind.
No matter who you vote for the government wins!
No matter who you vote for, the Government always gets in. Anon.
No medicine can cure a vulgar person.
No more duty can be urged upon those who are entering the great theater of life than simple loyalty to their best convictions. Edwin Hubbel Chapin
No more money for MICROSOFT. USE 4DOS!!!!
No more money for Mickey. Use 4DOS and DRDOS
No more money for Micro$oft ! Use DR-DOS 6.0 !
No more prizes for predicting rain. Prizes only for building arks. Anonymous
No mud can soil us but the mud we throw.
No muff's too tough. We dive at five.
No nation is fit to sit in judgment upon any other nation. Woodrow Wilson
No nation, no matter how enlightened, can endure criminal violence. If we cannot control it, we are admitting to the world and to ourselves that our laws are no more than a facade that crumbles when the winds of crisis rise. Alan Biole
No need to teach an eagle to fly. Greek Proverb
No offence intended to those that offence not intended to.
No one becomes depraved in a moment.
No one can be caught in places he does not visit.
No one can be right all of the time, but it helps to be right most of the time. Robert Half
No one can be so welcome a guest that he will not annoy his host after three days. Plautus
No one can build his security upon the nobleness of another person. Willa Cather
No one can count the apples in a seed. Anonymous
No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.
No one can get ahead of you when they're kicking you in the rear.
No one can guarantee success in war, but only deserve it. Winston Churchill
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. Eleanor Roosevelt
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.| Eleanor Roosevelt
No one can put you down without your full cooperation.
No one can see their reflection in running water. It is only in still water that we can see. Taoist Proverb
No one can think clearly with clenched fists.
No one does as much harm as one going about doing good.
No one ever said freedom was free.
No one ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public. H. L. Mencken
No one ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public. H.L. Mencken, philosopher
No one expects the Spanish Inquisition
No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!
No one has ever been blinded by looking on the bright side of life!
No one has ever bet enough on a winning horse.
No one has ever died an atheist. -Plato-
No one is rich enough to do without a neighbor. Danish Proverb
No one knows what he can do till he tries.
No one lies so boldly as the man who is indignant. Friederich Nietzsche
No one need think that the world can be ruled without blood. The civil sword shall and must be red and bloody. Martin Luther
No one regards what is before his feet; we all gaze at the stars.
No one test the depth of a river with both feet.
No one wants a good education. Everyone wants a good degree. Lee Rudolph
No one will dare maintain that it is better to do injustice than to bear it. Aristotle
No one within an organization really knows what's going on.
No one worth possessing can be quite possessed. Sara Teasdale
No one would remember the Good Samaritan if he'd only had good intentions - he had money, too. Margaret Thatcher
No opera plot can be sensible, for in sensible situations people do not sing. W H Auden
No other offense has ever been visited with such severe penalties as seeking to help the oppressed. Clarence Darrow
No person ever became wicked all at once.
No person is your friend who demands your silence, or denies your right to grow. Alice Walker
No person should govern another without their permission.
No person was ever honored for what he received. Honor has been the reward for what he gave. Calvin Coolidge
No poems can please nor live long that are written by water drinkers.
No pointed ears, but you sound like a Vulcan.  McCoy
No problem is insoluble in all conceivable circumstances.
No problem is so big and complicated that it can't be run away from. Linus (Peanuts character by Charles Schultz)
No problem is so formidable that you can't just walk away from it.
No problem is so large it can't be fit in somewhere.
No program works the first time you run it.
No project was ever completed on time and within budget. Cheops Law
No purchase required, details inside package.
No question is so difficult to answer as that to which the answer is obvious. George Bernard Shaw
No race can prosper till it learns that there is as much dignity in tilling a field as in writing a poem. Booker T. Washington
No retreat. No retreat. They must conquer or die who've no retreat. John Gay
No rock so hard but that a little wave may beat admission in a thousand years. Alfred, Lord Tennyson
No sacrifice short of individual liberty, individual self-respect, and individual enterprise is too great a price to pay for permanent peace. Clark H. Minor
No sense being pessimistic.  It wouldn't work anyway.
No sentence fragments.
No sooner said than done--so acts your man of worth.
No speech can be entirely bad if it is short enough.
No stream rises higher than its source. What ever man might build could never express or reflect more than he was. It was no more than what he felt. He could record neither more nor less than he had learned of life when the buildings were built ... Hi Frank Lloyd Wright
No student knows his subject: the most he knows is where and how to find out the things he does not know. Woodrow Wilson
No thanks. I already have a nagila.
No thoroughly occupied man was ever yet very miserable. Letitia Landon
No thought, no reflection, no analysis, no cultivation, no intention; let it settle itself. Tilopa
No turn left unstoned.
No two men can be half an hour together but one shall acquire an evident superiority over the other. Samuel Johnson
No wanna work.  Wanna bang on keyboard.
No wanna work. Wanna bang on keyboard.
No wickedness proceeds on any grounds of reason. Livy
No woman ever falls in love with a man unless she has a better opinion of him than he deserves. Ed Howe
No woman should ever be quite accurate about her age. It looks so calculating. Oscar Wilde
No wonder can last more than three days.
No writer's life understands that he's working when he's staring out the window
No, I don't understand my husband's theory of relativity, but I know my husband, and I know he can be trusted. Elsa Einstein
No, I never read the documentation
No, I'm NOT an Extended Character.
No, I'm from Iowa. I only work in Outer Space.
No, I'm from NZ. I only work in Outer Space.
No, I'm not a cop. What can I get for fifty bucks?|Pick up line
No, I'm not shy -- just poor and unemployed.
No, Number One, it is not your turn to say "engage."
No, Q, I meant a BUD light
No, Taco Bell is NOT the Mexican telephone company!
No, dear - smoke is SUPPOSED to come out...
No, no, nurse! I said SLIP off his SPECTACLES!!
No, that chair isn't saved. But we're praying for it!
No; not dead, "electroencephalographically challenged."
No?! Some people still read mail a packet at a time?!
Noah  Come quick  There's water in the basement
Noah saved animals from the flood by arcing them!
Noah upgraded and built an ARJ !
Noble deeds that are concealed are most esteemed.
Noble gases - when the King had too many Pork-n-Beans
Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.
Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest. Kin Hubbard
Nobody can be like me. Even I have trouble doing so.
Nobody can describe a fool to the life, without much patient self-inspection. Frank Moore Colby
Nobody dies nowadays of fatal truths: there are too many antidotes to them. Friedrich Nietzsche
Nobody ever expects the Spanish Inquisition
Nobody ever puts out a sign that says NICE DOG.
Nobody ever ruined their eyesight by looking at the bright side of something.
Nobody expects the ... Oh Bugger!
Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition | Monty Python
Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!
Nobody goes there anymore, it's too crowded....
Nobody has ever measured, not even poets, how much the heart can hold. Zelda Fitzgerald
Nobody notices when things go right.
Nobody notices when things go right. Zimmerman's Law of Complaints
Nobody roots for Goliath.
Nobody sees a flower really; it is so small. We haven't time, and to see takes time - like to have a friend takes time. Georgia O'Keefe
Nobody wants constructive criticism.  It's all we can do to put up with constructive praise.
Nobody's ever insulted to be invited. Mrs. Leonard Lyons
Nobody's ugly after 2 a.m.|Bumper sticker
Nodding the head does not row the boat.
Noel Coward The trouble with children is that they are not returnable. Quentin Crisp
Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who has merely laid an egg cackles as if she has laid an asteroid. Mark Twain
Non-Reciprocal Laws of Expectations: Negative expectations yield negative results. Positive expectations yield negative results.
Non-Trekkies of the world -- GET A FUTURE !
Non-fiction often is more unrealistic than fiction.
Noncombatant, n.: A dead Quaker. | Ambrose Bierce
None are more taken in with flattery than the proud, who wish to be the first and are not. Benedict Spinoza
None are so blind as those who have no eyes.
None are so fond of secrets as those who do not mean to keep them. Charles Caleb Colton
None but a mule denies his family. Anon.
None of us can boast about the morality of our ancestors. The records do not show that Adam and Eve were married. Ed Howe
None of you exist, my sysop types all this in.
None of you exist; my Sysop types all this in
None of you exists, my sysop types all this in!
None preaches better than the ant, and she says nothing. Benjamin Franklin
Nonsense, no man I know can do it that way. | O'Brien
Northern Exposure: Watch out for the frostbite
Nostalgia ain't what it used to be.
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
Nostalgia just ain't what it used to be ...
Not a computer nerd. Merely a techno-weenie.
Not a problem.
Not a real tagline, but an incredible soy substitute.
Not a scrap. I was deliberately wasting your time, sir.
Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious. Brendan Gill
Not all politician's minds are made out of concrete.
Not all the cookies are in the jar.
Not all those who know their minds know their hearts as well. Francois duc la Rochefoucauld
Not all who own a harp are harpers.
Not another NAK NAK joke, Please !
Not breaking the rules, just testing the elasticity...
Not doing more than average is what keeps the average down. William Winans
Not even computers will replace committees, because committees buy computers. Edward Shepherd Mead
Not even with BOTH hands AND a flashlight!
Not every soil can bear all things. | Virgil (19 BC)
Not everything more difficult is more meritorious.
Not failure, but low aim, is crime. James Russell Lowell
Not in rewards, but in the strength to strive, the blessing lies. J. T. Towbridge
Not many people realise just how well known I am.
Not now ... I have to go mow the laundry.
Not now, I have a headache!
Not now, Kato.
Not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. George Sala
Not quite human any longer.
Not sure if it helps, but turn the monitor ON.
Not the Beatles, but an incredible simulation
Not to go back is somewhat to advance, and men must walk, at least, before they dance. Alexander Pope
Not to have control over the senses is like sailing in a rudderless ship, bound to break to pieces on coming in contact with the very first rock. Mahatma Gandhi
Not to know is bad, but not to wish to know is worse.
Not tonight dear, I have a modem.
Not tonight honey... I have a modem.
Not tonight, dear.  I have a modem.
Not where I breathe, but where I love, I live; Not where I love, but where I am, I die. Robert Southwell
Not, I think, today, Commander. | Picard
Notes for a ballet, "The Spell": ... Suddenly Sigmund hears the flutter of wings, and a group of wild swans flies across the moon ... Sigmund is astounded to see that their leader is part swan and part woman -- unfortunately, divided lengthwise.  She enchants Sigmund, who is careful not to make any poultry jokes ... | Woody Allen
Nothin' ain't worth nothin', but it's free.
Nothing astonishes man so much as common sense and plain dealing.
Nothing astonishes men so much as common sense and plain dealing.
Nothing begins, and nothing ends, That is not paid with moan; For we are born in others' pain And perish in our own. Francis Thompson
Nothing behind you matters
Nothing can be created from nothing.  | Lucretius (55 BC)
Nothing can go wrong, go wrong, go wrong, go wro
Nothing can have value without being an object of utility. Karl Marx
Nothing contributes more to a person's peace of mind than having no opinions at all. G. C. Lichtenberg
Nothing could be finah than to be in Carolina!
Nothing cures a case of nerves like a case of beer.
Nothing cures insomnia like the realization that it's time to get up.
Nothing dies so hard, or rallies so often as intolerance. Henry Ward Beecher
Nothing does reason more right, than the coolness of those that offer it: For Truth often suffers more by the heat of its defenders, than from the arguments of its opposers. William Penn
Nothing endures but change.
Nothing endures but change.  | Heraclitus (480 BC)
Nothing endures but personal qualities. Walt Whitman
Nothing ever goes away.
Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in memory as the wish to forget it. Montaigne
Nothing for preserving the body like having no heart. John Petit-Senn
Nothing gives an author so much pleasure as to find his works respectfully quoted by other learned authors. Benjamin Franklin
Nothing good ever comes of violence. Martin Luther
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
Nothing happens unless first a dream. Carl Sandburg
Nothing in education is so astonishing as the amount of ignorance it accumulates in the form of inert facts. Henry Brooks Adams
Nothing in his life became him like the leaving it. William Shakespeare
Nothing in life is to be feared.  It is only to be understood.
Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood. Marie Curie
Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.| Slick's Law of the Universe
Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence and determination. Calvin Coolidge
Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Nothing increases your golf score like witnesses.
Nothing is 100% certain, bug free or IBM compatible.
Nothing is 100% certain, bug free, or IBM compatible.
Nothing is a waste of time if you use the experience wisely. Rodin
Nothing is as easy as it looks.
Nothing is as good as a change.
Nothing is as good as it seems beforehand. George Eliot
Nothing is as inevitable as a mistake whose time has come
Nothing is as inevitable as a mistake whose time has come.
Nothing is as irritating as the fellow who chats pleasantly while he's overcharging you. Kin Hubbard
Nothing is as temporary as that which is called permanent.
Nothing is as terrible to see as ignorance in action. Goethe
Nothing is but what is not.
Nothing is cheap which is superfluous, for what one does not need, is dear at a penny. Plutarch
Nothing is ever a complete failure; it can always serve as a bad example.
Nothing is ever accomplished by a reasonable man.
Nothing is ever constant, unless it is dead.
Nothing is ever done beautifully which is done in rivalship: or nobly, which is done in pride. John Ruskin
Nothing is ever so bad that it can't get worse.
Nothing is faster than the speed of light ... To prove this to yourself, try opening the refrigerator door before the light comes on.
Nothing is finished until the paperwork is done.
Nothing is foolproof because fools are so ingenious
Nothing is greater, or more fearful sacrilege than to prostitute the great name of God to the petulancy of an idle tongue. Jeremy Taylor
Nothing is ill said if it is not ill taken.
Nothing is illegal if one hundred businessmen decide to do it. | Andrew Young
Nothing is impossible for anyone impervious to reason
Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do the work.
Nothing is impossible; there are ways that lead to everything, and if we had sufficient will we should always have sufficient means. It is often merely for an excuse that we say things are impossible. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Nothing is interesting if you're not interested.
Nothing is lasting but change; nothing perpetual but death. Ludwig Brne
Nothing is less in our power than the heart, and far from commanding we are forced to obey it. Jean Jacques Rousseau
Nothing is more fairly distributed than common sense: no one thinks he needs more of it than he already has. Descartes
Nothing is more noble, nothing more venerable than fidelity. Faithfulness and truth are the most sacred excellences and endowments of the human mind. Cicero
Nothing is more sad than the death of an illusion. Arthur Koestler
Nothing is opened more often by mistake than the mouth.
Nothing is really work unless you would rather be doing something else. James Matthew Barrie
Nothing is skinnier than nothing.
Nothing is so firmly believed as that which we least know. Michel de Montaigne
Nothing is so firmly believed as which is least known.
Nothing is so good as it seems beforehand. George Eliot
Nothing is so simple that it can't get screwed up.
Nothing is so smiple that it can't be screwed up
Nothing is so smiple that it can't get screwed up.
Nothing is so wretched or foolish as to anticipate misfortunes. What madness is it to be expecting evil before it comes. Seneca
Nothing is sometimes the best thing to say.
Nothing is wonderful when you get used to it. Ed Howe
Nothing is worse than active ignorance. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Nothing is worse than to see idiots succeed where we have failed.
Nothing like fresh men for the gators.
Nothing makes a politician forget campaign promises faster than being elected.
Nothing makes a vacation seem better than hindsight.
Nothing makes one feel so strong as a call for help. George MacDonald
Nothing more clearly show how little God esteems his gift to men of wealth, money, position and other wordly goods, than the way he distributes these, and the sort of men who are most amply provided with them. Jean De La Bruyere
Nothing more detestable does the earth produce than an ungrateful man. Ausonius
Nothing motivates a man more than to see his boss do an honest day's work.
Nothing really happens until it happens to you.
Nothing recedes like success.
Nothing recedes like success. | Walter Winchell
Nothing so cements and holds together all the parts of a society as faith or credit, which can never be kept up unless men are under some force or necessity of honestly paying what they owe to one another. Cicero
Nothing so much prevents our being natural as the desire of appearing so. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits. Mark Twain
Nothing succeeds like excess.
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love. | Charlie Brown
Nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.
Nothing this evil EVER dies!
Nothing tires a man more than to be grateful all the time. Ed Howe
Nothing ventured... nothing gained... nothing taxed!!!
Nothing vouchered, nothing gained.
Nothing will dispel enthusiasm like a small admission fee.
Nothing will ever happen to you.
Nothing would more contribute to make a man wise than to have always an enemy in his view. Lord Halifax
Nothing wrong that reincarnation won't cure.
Nothing's IMPOSSIBLE to those that don't have to do it.
Nothing's beautiful from every point of view. Horace
Nothing's impossible for those who don't have to do it.
Notice how no one criticized Riker until Wesley was gone?
Notice that they do not so much fly as...plummet.
Notice: All incoming fire has the right of way.
Novelty has charms that our minds can hardly withstand. William Makepeace Thackeray
Novelty is the great parent of pleasure. Robert South
November, n.: The eleventh twelfth of a weariness. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Now I lay me down to sleep I pray the double lock will keep; May no brick through the window break, And, no one rob me till I awake.
Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor bastard die for his country. George S. Patton Jr.
Now I've gone too far, where do I go now ?
Now I've laid me down to die I pray my neighbors not to pry Too deeply into sins that I Not only cannot here deny But much enjoyed as life flew by. Preston Sturges, Epitaph
Now and then an innocent man is sent to the Legislature.
Now and then an innocent person is sent to the legislature.
Now and then someone innocent is sent to the legislature.
Now and then, an innocent man is sent to the Legislature.
Now comes the mystery. Henry Ward Beecher
Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time.
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!
Now if I can run Win3 under DV under Unix...
Now if I could only find the Video switch!
Now is not a good time to annoy me
Now is the time for all good men to come to.
Now now, we're not schizophrenic, are we?
Now that I am dead, I'm finally making a living.
Now that I've given up hope I feel much better...
Now that we travel in space how about travelling in time?
Now the only thing standing between you and a degree is, well, me. And 18 minutes. S. Frederic Star, author, at Wooster College Graduation, 1995
Now this won't hurt a bit....
Now we see the violence inherent in the system!
Now we sit through Shakespeare in order to recognize the quotations. Orson Welles
Now where did I park my hard drive??
Now where did I put that nitwit filter?
Now where did I put that rubber doll?
Now where did I put those transwarp drive specs? ...
Now, THIS is a tagline
Now, where did I put that dweeb filter?
Nowadays, manners are easy and life is hard. Benjamin Disraeli
Nuclear Atom - an atom that has just been washed.
Nuclear Transformation - what happened to the cows in The Day After.
Nuclear submarine's major problem: Whale mating season.
Nudist Camp sign - Sorry, Clothed for Winter.
Nudists are people who wear one-button suits.
Nuke 'em 'til they glow, & shoot 'em in the dark !
Nuke the Gay Whales for Christ.
Nuke the baby fur whales.
Nuke the baby seals for Jesus
Nuke the unborn baby gay whales for Christ.|Bumper sticker
Nuke the whales
Null modems were created when God got no handshake.
Number 9. Number 9. Number 9. Number 9. Number 9. | The Beatles
Number of Vulcans needed to replace a bulb? Precisely 1.000000
Numeric stability is probably not all that important when you're guessing.
Nuthin' is simple sometimes...
Nutritional tip:  Only Irish Coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alchohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat.
Nutritionally, hundred dollar bills are equal to ones, but more sanitary due to limited circulation. | Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
Nyuck Nyuck Nyuck [POP] Oooooooh, a wise guy
O God, thy sea is so great, and my boat is so small. Anonymous
O give me a home, Where the buffalo roam, Where the deer and the antelope play, Where seldom is heard A discouraging word, 'Cause what can an antelope say?
O how small a portion of earth will hold us when we are dead, who ambitiously seek after the whole world while we are living. Philip II
O'BRIEN'S LAW: Nothing is ever done for the right reasons.
O'REILLY'S SPRING CLEANING LAW: Cleanliness is next to impossible.
O'TOOLE'S AXIOM: One child is not enough, but two are far too many.
O'TOOLE'S COMMENTARY: Murphy was an optimist.
O, beware, my lord, of jealousy; It is the green-eyed monster which doth mock The meat it feeds on. William Shakespeare
O, it is excellent to have a giant's strength, but it is tyrannous to use it like a giant. William Shakespeare
O.K to coninue??  <yes> <no> <MAYBE?>
OH NO, my wife burned the rice crispies--AGAIN!!
OK Scotty, NOW  Detonate and energize  I mean.......
OK, I'm weird ! But I'm saving up to be eccentric.
OK, I'm weird But I'm saving up to be eccentric.
OK, I'm weird! But I'm saving up to become eccentric.
OK. I got a life. Now, what do I do with it?
OLIVERS' LAW OF LOCATION: No matter where you go, there you are.
ONLINE ? Good! Hit <ALT-H> to take the I.Q. Test
OOPS: Not just for klutzes anymore
OOPs ! This is C++, not C !
OOPs, I stepped on a GUI !
OPCODE: AAR = Alter at Random
OPCODE: AND = Accelerate Noisy Disk
OPCODE: AWTT = Assemble with Tinker Toys
OPCODE: CAPH = Convert All Prime numbers to Hex
OPCODE: CBNC = Close, but no Cigar
OPCODE: CLBRI = Clobber Register Immediately
OPCODE: CLD = Close Logical Door
OPCODE: CMPSW = Copy Multiple Programs to Standard Window
OPCODE: CNB = Cause Nervous Breakdown
OPCODE: COLB = Crash for Operator's Lunch Break
OPCODE: CPPR = Crumple Printer Paper and Rip
OPCODE: EXOP = Execute Operator
OPCODE: EXPP = Execute Political Prisoner
OPCODE: FLI = Flash Lights Impressively
OPCODE: FSM = Fold, Spindle and Mutilate
OPCODE: FSRA = Forms Skip and Run Away
OPCODE: HLT = Hide Last Term paper
OPCODE: IAE = Ignore All Exceptions
OPCODE: IIB = Ignore Inquiry and Branch
OPCODE: INT = Invade Next Terminal
OPCODE: IRET = Ignore Request and Explode Terminal
OPCODE: JO = Jail Owner
OPCODE: JP = Junk Program
OPCODE: PVLC = Punch Variable Length Card
OPCODE: RA = Randomize Answer
OPCODE: RASC = Read and Shred Card
OPCODE: RCB = Read Command Backwards
OPCODE: RDA = Refuse to Disclose Answer
OPCODE: RDB = Run Disk Backwards
OPCODE: STA = Store Anywhere
OPCODE: STROM = Store in Read-only Memory
OPCODE: TARC = Take Arithmetic Review Course
OPCODE: UER = Update and Erase Record
OPCODE: ULDA = Unload Accumulator
OPCODE: UP = Understand Program
OPCODE: UPCI = Update Card In Place
OPCODE: WBT = Water Binary Tree
OPCODE: WEMG = Write Eighteen Minute Gap
OPCODE: WF = Wait Forever
OPCODE: WSWW = Work in Strange and Wondrous Ways
OPCODE: WWLR = Write Wrong-Length Record
OPERATER ERROR. (A)bort, (R)etry, (S)hoot ?
OPERATER ERROR.. (A)bort, (R)etry, (S)hoot...
OPERATOR ERROR: Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah, Nyah
OPERATOR! Trace this call and tell me where I am.
OPINION: Where "moderation" means "attack."
ORG.ASM Not Found.  Wife not happy!
OS/2 - Not just another pretty program loader!
OS/2 - Windows with bullet-proof glass.
OS/2 2 ..Will it send DOS & Windows the way of CP/M ?????
OS/2 : half an operating system.
OS/2 VirusScan - "Windows found: Remove it? (Y/y)"
OS/2 is statistically proven to cause suicide.
OS/2...Opens up Windows, shuts up Gates.
OS/2: What Windows will NEVER BE!
OSBORN'S LAW: Variables won't, constants aren't.
OUCH! Got my floppy caught in my PKZipper!
OUT TO LUNCH - If not back at five, OUT TO DINNER!
Obedience alone gives the right to command. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Obesity: A surplus gone to waist.
Obey little! Resist much! Question authority! Eat fibre!
Objection, your Honour! My client is an idiot!
Objectivity is in the eye of the beholder
Objects in mirror are closer than they appear. Anonymous
Objects in taglines are closer than they appear.
Objects on screen are closer than they appear...
Obscenity is whatever gives a judge an erection.
Observationactivity of both eyes and ears. Horace Mann
Observe the face of the wife to know the husband's character.
Observe your enemies, for they first find out your faults. Antisthenes
Observe your enemies, for they first find your faults. Greek Proverb
Obviously the only rational solution to your problem is suicide.
Obviously, the highest type of efficiency is that which can utilize existing material to the best advantage. Jawaharlal Nehru
Occasional chair: What is it the rest of the time?
Occasionally in life there are those moments of unutterable fulfillment which cannot be completely explained by those symbols called words. Their meanings can only be articulated by the inaudible language of the heart. Martin Luther King, Jr.
Occasionally, an innocent man is sent to the legislature.
Occasions are rare; and those who know how to seize upon them are rarer. Josh Billings
October. This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks. The others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June and December
Of all acts of man repentance is the most divine. The greatest of all faults is to be conscious of none. Thomas Carlyle
Of all animals, the boy is most unmanageable. | Plato
Of all forms of caution, caution in love is the most fatal.
Of all liars, memory is the most convincing.
Of all the animals, the boy is the most unmanageable.
Of all the animals, the boy is the most unmanageable. | Plato
Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best. Kin Hubbard
Of all the people I have met, you are certainly one
Of all the people I've met you're certainly one of them
Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother. Lin Yutang
Of all the things I lost, I miss my mind the most.
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most. Anonymous
Of all the things which wisdom provides to make us entirely happy, much the greatest is the possession of friendship. Epicurus
Of all thirty-six alternatives, running away is best.
Of all wild beasts, the most difficult to manage. Plato
Of course I Know what I'm doing... ...NO CARRIER
Of course I know Braille, :.::: ::..: ::.::.  :..::
Of course I tessssted it.
Of course I turned, I hit you didn't I?
Of course I'm a virgin!  I'm catholic!
Of course I'm running Windows ... [kVxB NO CARRIER
Of course there's a lot of knowledge in universities: the freshmen bring a little in; the seniors don't take much away, so knowledge sort of accumulates.... Dr. A. Lawrence Lowell
Of course there's no reason for it, it's just our policy.
Of every ten persons who talk about you, nine will say something bad, and the tenth will say something good in a bad way. Antoine Rivarol
Of my own spirit let me be in sole though feeble mastery. Sara Teasdale
Off by CRASHING COMPUTER. Time Logged: ߔܵ
Office Automation, n.: The use of computers to improve efficiency by removing anyone you would want to talk with over coffee.
Often it is just lack of imagination that keeps a man from suffering very much. Marcel Proust
Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lampposts -- for support rather than illumination.
Often the test of courage is not to die but to live.
Ogden's Law: The sooner you fall behind, the more time you have to catch up.
Oh God! I almost stole a tagline!
Oh I saw the stop-Sign Officer, It's YOU I didn't see!
Oh Really| Lucy
Oh Sheer ecstasy
Oh Tasha, See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me
Oh What fun this is
Oh boy...
Oh don't the days seem lank and long When all goes right and none goes wrong, And isn't your life extremely flat With nothing whatever to grumble at
Oh freddled gruntbuggly, thy nacturations are to me...
Oh goody! Another Muranium Explosive Space Modulator!
Oh joy Oh rapture
Oh my Another kludge
Oh my God!
Oh my!	Another kludge!
Oh no ! Not another 'undocumented feature' !
Oh no you don't!  Your not stealing this one!
Oh no! Not another 'undocumented feature'!
Oh no, not another learning experience
Oh no, not another learning experience!
Oh sure  But what's the speed of dark?
Oh sure! But what's the speed of dark?
Oh that?  It was playing leap frog with a unicorn.
Oh this age  How tasteless and ill-bred it is.
Oh this age!  How tasteless and ill-bred it is.
Oh very clever Worf, eat any good books lately?
Oh wearisome condition of humanity  Born under one law, to another bound.
Oh wearisome condition of humanity!  Born under one law, to another bound.
Oh what a beautiful morning Oh what a beautiful day
Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive.
Oh yeah? Well, beam *THIS* up, pal!
Oh! To be an Interface Cowboy in Hyperspace.!!!
Oh, I can 'C' clearly now, my brain is gone...
Oh, I'm a tagline, and I'm OK...
Oh, I'm sorry...were the voices in my head bothering you?
Oh, Nicky, you're such a tool.
Oh, Picard, I will enjoy you morning, noon and night
Oh, heavy is the burden of being me. * Q
Oh, molluscs. I thought you said bacon.
Oh, no! Not another learning experience!
Oh, pardon me, was that *your* culture? So sorry.
Oh, very clever Worf. Eat any good books lately?
Oh, very good Worf.  Eat any good books lately?
Oh, well, I guess this is just going to be one of those lifetimes.
Oh, well... never mind
Oh, what a blamed uncertain thing This pesky weather is; It blew and snew and then it thew, And now, by jing, it's friz! Philander Johnson
Oh, what the hell, here's a tagline.
Oh, wow  Look at the moon
Oh, yeah? Well, beam THIS up, pal!
Oh, you didn't want an XEROX of the disk?
Ohmygosh!.....Ugottabekidding......
Okay - right after this one we're BACK to the TOPIC
Okay! - Okay! - I'll be off the phone in a minute!  Geez!
Okay, I pulled the pin.  Now what?..  Hey, where are you going?
Okay, I'm crazy! But I'm saving up to be eccentric!
Okay, where's the virgin? We can't have a virgin sacrifice without a virgin. Who's virgin monitor for this week?
Old MacDonald had a computer with EIA I/O.
Old MacDonald had a computer with an EIE I/O
Old MacDonald had a computer, with EIA I/O...
Old MacDonald had a processor - Enable interrupts, enable input/output.
Old MacDonald had an agricultural real estate tax abatement.
Old Skiers never die. They just go downhill.
Old accountants never die, they just lose their balance.
Old age and treachery will overcome youth and skill.
Old age comes at a bad time in life.
Old age is better than the alternative.
Old age is fifteen years older than I am. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you're aboard ther's nothing you can do. Golda Meir
Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you're aboard, there's nothing you can do. Golda Meir
Old age is no place for sissies. Bette Davis
Old age is the harbor of all ills.
Old age is the most unexpected of things that can happen to a man. | Trotsky
Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative. Maurice Chevalier
Old age needs so little, but it needs that little so much.
Old bakers never die, they just quit making dough.
Old bakers never die, you just can't get a rise out of them.
Old birds are hard to pluck.
Old fishermen never die.  They just smell that way...
Old is when your back goes out more often than you do.
Old maids sweeten their tea with scandal. Josh Billings
Old men are fond of giving advice to console themselves for being no longer in a position to give bad Examples. Francois de la Rouchefoucald
Old men are fond of giving good advice to console themselves for their inability to give bad examples.
Old men give good advice when they are no longer able to provide bad examples.
Old minds are like old horses; you must exercise them if you wish to keep them in working order. John Quincy Adams
Old mufflers never die, they get exhausted.
Old musicians never die, they just decompose.
Old programmers don't die, they just lose their memory.
Old programmers never die, they just become managers.
Old programmers never die, they just hit account block limit.
Old programmers never die, they just terminate and stay resident.
Old programmers never die.  They just branch to a new address.
Old soldiers never die, they just fade away..
Old soldiers never die.  Young ones do.
Old soldiers never die. Young soldiers do.
Old soldiers never die...young ones do.
Old soldiers never die; they just fade away. Douglas MacArthur
Older men declare war. But it is the youth that must fight and die. Herbert Hoover
Oliver's Law: Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
Omaha? They have computers in Omaha?????
Omak:
On a clear desk you can never find anything.
On a clear disk you can seek forever.
On a clear disk, you can seek forever.
On a paper submitted by a physicist colleague: "This isn't right.  This isn't even wrong." | Wolfgang Pauli
On a scale of 1 to 10, 4 is about 7.
On an electrician's truck: Let Us Remove Your Shorts
On an occaision of this kind it becomes more than a moral duty to speak one's mind. It becomes a pleasure. Oscar Wilde, from The Importance of Being Earnest
On earth there is no heaven, but there are pieces of it. Jules Renard
On finding a stone we see no dog; on seeing a dog we find no stone.
On leave from CNN...
On mechanical slavery, on the slavery of the machine, the future of the world depends. Oscar Wilde
On one issue at least, men and women agree: they both distrust women. H. L. Mencken
On one issue, at least, men and women agree; they both distrust women. H. L. Mencken
On second thought, let's not go to Camelot.  It is a silly place.
On the edge of a precipice, only a fool does cartwheels.
On the other hand, you also have 5 fingers.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
On the other hand... you have five different fingers.
On the other hand..you have five different fingers
On the outskirts of every agony sits some observant fellow who points. Virginia Woolf, playwrite
On the soft bed of luxury most kingdoms have expired. Edward Young
On the unlabeled disk? HELL they're all unlabeled!
On the wall of the Enterprise woman's restroom: "Where no man has gone before".
On the way to the corner, a dropped tool will land on your foot.
On the way to the corner, any dropped tool will first strike your toes. Corollary to Anthony's Law of the Workshop
On this shrunken globe, men can no longer live as strangers. Adlai E. Stevenson
On what conclusions do you base your facts?
On-line, adj.:  The idea that a human being should always be accessible to a computer.
Once ... in the wilds of Afghanistan, I lost my corkscrew, and we were forced to live on nothing but food and water for days. | W. C. Fields, "My Little Chickadee"
Once I make up my mind, I'm full of indecision. Oscar Levant
Once I thought I was wrong - but I was mistaken
Once a can of worms is opened, the only way to recan them is in a bigger can.
Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it makes it worse.
Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it only makes it worse.
Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it only makes it worse. Finagle's Fourth Law
Once a newspaper touches a story, the facts are lost forever, even to the protagonists. Norman Mailer
Once a word has been allowed to escape, it cannot be recalled.
Once again, Odo wins the Twister championship.
Once bitten, twice shy Proverb
Once during Prohibition I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. W. C. Fields
Once harm has been done, even a fool understands it | Homer
Once harm has been done, even a fool understands it.
Once is an accident, twice is coincidence, thrice is enemy action.
Once more unto the breach, dear friends | Henry V
Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances continue to exist, a wonderful living side by side can grow up, if they succeed in loving the distance between them which makes it possible for each to see each other whole against the sky. | Rainer Rilke
Once they realized it was a humanitarian gesture, they jumped on it. Patrick Dordan, UPS Deliveryman, who suggested that his company fly the killer whale used in the movie 'Free Willy' to Oregon for rest and recuperation (which they did with a C-130 cargo plane), 1996
Once uttered, words run faster than the horses I bet on.
Once you open a can of worms, the only way to recan them is to use a bigger can. Zymurgy's First Law of Systems Dynamics Politics makes estranged bedfellows. Goodman Ace
Once you understand how to write a program get someone else to write it.
Once you understand your computer it is obsolete
Once, adv.: Enough. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Once, during prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. W. C. Fields
One Bell System - it sometimes works.
One Bell System - it works.
One Iraqui dictator can ruin your whole day.
One Klingon Flea to another...Meet you on the next ridge.
One Page Principle: A specification that will not fit on one page of 8.5x11 inch paper cannot be understood. | Mark Ardis
One accurate measurement is worth a thousand expert opinions.
One already wet does not fear the rain.
One always has time enough, if one will apply it well. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
One atom bomb can really ruin your day.
One big vice in a man is apt to keep out a great many smaller ones. Bret Harte
One can always be kind to people about whom one cares nothing.
One can endure sorrow alone, but it takes two to be glad. Elbert Hubbard
One can never underestimate the intelligence of the electorate.
One can't proceed from the informal to the formal by formal means.
One cool judgment is worth a thousand hasty councils. The thing to do is to supply light and not heat. Woodrow Wilson
One country, one constitution, one destiny. Daniel Webster
One crow will not peck out another crow's eyes.
One day a student asked Taiga, 'What is the most difficult part of painting?' Taiga answered, 'The part of the paper where nothing is painted is the most difficult.' Painting Zen
One day you will find yourself and be quite disappointed.
One difference between a man and a machine is that a machine is quiet when well oiled.
One does evil enough when one does nothing good. German Proverb
One drink is just right; two is too many; three are too few. Spanish Proverb
One enemy can harm you more than one hundred friends can do you good.
One essential to success is that you desire be an all-obsessing one, your thoughts and aims be co-ordinated, and your energy be concentrated and applied without letup. Anonymous
One family builds a wall, two families enjoy it.
One funged curve is worth a thousand weasel words.
One good reason why computers can do more work than people is that they never have to stop and answer the phone.
One good schoolmaster is worth a thousand priests. Robert Green Ingersoll
One good turn deserves another.
One good turn gets ALL the blankets.
One good turn gets most of the blanket.
One good turn gets the whole blanket.
One great society alone on earth: the noble living and the noble dead. William Wordsworth
One great use of words is to hide our thoughts. Voltaire
One half of the world must sweat and groan that the other half may dream.
One half of the world must sweat and groan that the other half may dream. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
One hand cannot applaud.
One has to pay dearly for immortality; one has to die several times while one is still alive. Friedrich Nietzsche
One horse-laugh is worth ten thousand syllogisms. It is not only more effective; it is also vastly more intelligent. H. L. Mencken
One in Kate Bush is worth two in the Hand.
One is never more on trial than in the moment of excessive good fortune. Lew Wallace
One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do...
One is tolerant only of that which does not concern him.
One is truly wise who gains wisdom from another's mishap.
One kid I put thru college, the other I put thru a wall.
One learns to itch where one can scratch. Ernest Bramah
One legged girls are pushovers.
One lie always leads to another.
One lie makes many.
One lie or one peanut...One leads to another.
One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men. No machine can do the work of one extraordinary man. Elbert Hubbard
One machine can do the work of fifty ordinary men. No machine can do the work of one one extrordinary man. Elbert Hubbard
One man gathers what another man spills...
One man meets an infamous punishment for that crime which confers a diadem on others. Juvenal
One man plus courage is a majority.
One man tells a falsehood, a hundred repeat it as true.
One man's Windows are another man's walls.
One man's meat is another's editor
One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
One man's upload is another man's download
One man's word is no man's word; we should quietly hear both sides. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
One may know how to gain a victory, and know not how to use it. Barca
One meal a day is enough for a lion, and it ought to be for a man. George Fordyce
One meets his destiny often in the road he takes to avoid it. French Proverb
One more time...Trying Megamail
One must be poor to know the luxury of giving.
One must talk about everything according to its nature, how it comes to be and how it grows. Men have talked about the world without paying attention to the world of their own minds, as if they were asleep or absent-minded. Heraclitus
One never knows, do one ?
One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people.
One night I came home very late. It was the next night
One night I walked home very late and fell asleep in somebody's satellite dish. My dreams were showing up on TV's all over the world. Stephen Wright
One of it's legs is both the same.
One of my less pleasant chores when I was young was to read the Bible from one end to the other.  Reading the Bible straight through is at least 70 percent discipline, like learning Latin.  But the good parts are, of course, simply amazing.  God is an extremely uneven writer, but when He's good, nobody can touch Him. | John Gardner, NYT Book Review, Jan 1983
One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries. A. A. Milne, author
One of the best temporary cures for pride and affection is seasickness; a man who wants to vomit never puts on airs. Josh Billings
One of the great disadvantages of hurry is that takes such a long time.
One of the greatest disservices you can do a man is to lend him money that he can't pay back. Jesse H. Jones
One of the greatest pieces of economic wisdom is to know what you do not know. John Kenneth Galbraith
One of the hardest secrets for a man to keep is his opinion of himself.
One of the ill effects of cruelty is that it makes the bystanders cruel. Thomas Fowell Buxton
One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.
One of the most wonderful things in nature is a glance of the eye; it transcends speech; it is the bodily symbol of identity. Ralph Waldo Emerson
One of the oldest human needs is having someone to wonder where you are when you don't come home at night. Margaret Mead
One of the oldest problems puzzled over in the Talmud is: "Why did God create goyim?"  The generally accepted answer is "somebody has to buy retail." | Arthur Naiman, "Every Goy's Guide to Yiddish"
One of the proofs of the divinity of our gospel is the preaching it has survived. Woodrow Wilson
One of the proofs of the immortality of the soul is that myriads have believed itthey also believed the world was flat. Mark Twain
One of the secrets of life is to keep our intellectual curiosity acute. William Lyon Phelps
One of the simple but genuine pleasures in life is getting up in the morning and hurrying to a mousetrap you set the night before. Kin Hubbard
One of the strongest characteristics of genius is the power of lighting its own fire. John Watson Foster
One of the strongest natural proofs of the folly of hereditary right in kings is, that nature disapproves it; otherwise she would not so frequently turn it into ridicule by giving mankind an ass in place of a lion. Thomas Paine
One of these days is none of these days.
One ought to have a good memory when he has told a lie. Corneille
One peek is worth a thousand finesses.
One peels a problem like an onion.
One person with a belief is equal to a force of ninety-nine who have only interests. John Stuart Mill
One person's <grin> is another's <groan>.
One picture is worth a thousand words Proverb
One picture is worth a thousand words.	See diagram below.
One picture is worth a thousand words. See diagram below.
One picture is worth more than ten thousand words.
One real world is enough. George Santayana
One rotten apple spoils the whole barrel Proverb
One seldom sees a monument to a committee.
One seventh of our lives is spent on Mondays.
One should be just as careful in choosing one's pleasures as in avoiding calamities. Chinese Proverb
One should eat to live, not live to eat. Benjamin Franklin
One should either be sad or joyful. Contentment is a warm sty for eaters and sleepers. Eugene O'Neill
One should never trust a woman who tells one her real age. A woman who would tell one that would tell one anything. Oscar Wilde
One swallow does not make a summer.   |  Aristotle
One that desires to excel should endeavor in those things that are in themselves most excellent. Epictetus
One thing I can say about George...he may not be able to keep a job, but he's not boring. Barbara Bush, first lady, 1995
One thing only has been lent to youth and age in commondiscontent. Matthew Arnold
One thing the inventors can't seem to get the bugs out of is fresh paint.
One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child's name and how old he or she is. Erma Bombeck
One thorn of experience is worth a whole wilderness of warning. James Russell Lowell
One time a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign. He said, 'Didn't you see the stop sign?' I said, 'Yeah, but I don't believe everything I read.' Stephen Wright
One time the power went out in my house and I had to use the flash on my camera to see my way around. I made a sandwich and took fifty pictures of my face. The neighbors thought there was lightning in my house. Stephen Wright
One truth stands firm. All that happens in world history rests on something spiritual. If the spiritual is strong, it creates world history. If it is weak, it suffers world history. Albert Schweitzer
One ungrateful man does an injury to all who stand in need of aid. Publilius Syrus
One very important ingredient of success is a good, wide-awake, persistent, tireless enemy. Frank B. Shutts
One wanton pointer, and you're in the soup!
One way to better your lot is to do a lot better...
One way to stop a runaway horse is to bet on him.
One who has a clear conscience has a foggy memory.
One who has a shady past knows that nice guys finish last.
One who is contented with what he has done will never become famous for what he will do. He has lain down to die, and the grass is already over him. Christian Nestell Bovee
One who is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.
One who is in peril thinks with their legs.
One who laughs last probably doesn't understand the joke.
One who lives in a wine cellar rarely sees the light of day.
One will not have needed the future perfect in one's entire life.
One word sums up probably the responsibility of any vice president, and that one word is 'to be prepared'. | Vice President Dan Quayle
One's real life is often the life that one does not lead.
One, with God, is always a majority, but many a martyr has been burned at the stake while the votes were being counted. Thomas B. Reed
One-half of knowing what you want is knowing what you must give up before you get it. Sidney Howard
One-third of the people in the United States promote, while the other two-thirds provide. Will Rogers
Online
Only 19,999 lines of C++ to my next ski trip...
Only God can make a tree, but only Man can drive by it so fast.| Ferrari Driver.
Only God can make random selections.
Only a fool has no doubts.
Only a mediocre person is always at his best.
Only a mediocre writer is always at his best. W. Somerset Maugham
Only a sadistic man or a fool tells the truth on social occasions.
Only a wimpy God can't get it right the first time!
Only adults have difficulty with child-proof bottles.
Only adults have difficulty with childproof caps.|
Only adults have trouble with child-proof bottles.
Only an inventor knows how to borrow, and every man is or should be an inventor. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Only by the negation does one arrive at the affirmation.
Only cosmetologists give make-up exams.
Only death is fatal - life is not !
Only eyes washed by tears can see clearly. Louis L. Mann
Only fools are quoted.
Only fools say it can't be done.
Only free peoples can hold their purpose and their honor steady to a common end and prefer the interest of mankind to any narrow interest of their own. Woodrow Wilson
Only he is successful in his business who makes that pursuit which affords him the highest pleasure sustain him. Henry David Thoreau
Only hey can conquer who believe they can.
Only in quiet waters things mirror themselves undistorted. Only in a quiet mind is adequate perception of the world. Hans Margolius
Only in your dreams are you really free.
Only in your dreams, Commander. | Troi
Only lemmings jump to conclusions.
Only mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the noonday sun. Indian Proverb
Only mediocrity of enjoyment is allowed to man. Hugh Blair
Only one good: Knowledge. One evil: Ignorance. | Socrates
Only one koan matters you. Ikkyu
Only one who devotes himself to a cause with his whole strength and soul can be a true master. For this reason mastry demands all of a person. Albert Einstein
Only our individual faith in freedom can keep us free. Dwight D. Eisenhower
Only presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial "we."
Only someone with nothing to be sorry for smiles back at the rear of an elephant.
Only stop for walls - Speedo
Only the consciousness of a purpose that is mightier than any man and worthy of all men can fortify and inspirit and compose the souls of men. Walter Lippmann
Only the educated are free. Epictetus
Only the game fish swims upstream.
Only the good die young. Note the average age in Parliament.
Only the hand that erases can write the true thing.
Only the little people pay taxes. Leona Helmsley, hotel owner and prison inmate, 1989
Only the mediocre are always at their best.
Only the mediocre are at their best all the time.
Only the middle-aged have all their five senses in the keeping of their wits. Hervey Allen
Only the poet can look beyond the detail and see the whole picture. Helen Hayes
Only the rich have distant relatives.
Only the sinner has a right to preach. Christopher Morley
Only the stupidest calves chose their own butcher.
Only the suppressed word is dangerous. Ludwig Brne
Only the winners decide what were war crimes.
Only the young die good. Cynic's Calendar
Only those things are beautiful which are inspired by madness and written by reason. Andr Gide
Only those who attempt the absurd achieve the impossible.
Only those who attempt the absurd can achieve the impossible.
Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly. Robert F. Kennedy
Only those with nothing to be sorry for smile back at the rear of an elephant.
Only two great groups of animals, men and ants, indulge in highly organized mass warfare. Charles H. Maskins
Only useless documentation transcends the first two laws. Arnold's Third Law of Documentation
Onward, through the fog.
Oops! You found another "Undocumented Feature!"
Oops, time for Ponn Farr
Open Mouth, Insert Foot, Chew Carefully
Open Mouth, Insert foot, SHUTUP!
Open Mouth. Insert Foot. Chew Carefully.
Open WINDOWS and you let BUGS in...
Open doors we find our way; we look, we see, we smile.
Open minded? Space Cadet? Vacuum Technology?
Open mouth, insert foot, echo internationally.
Open mouth. Insert Foot. Echo internationally.
Open your drive door, honey.
Open your mouth honey, it's just a tongue depressor...
Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and instead of bleeding, sings. Ed Gardner
Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back, and instead of bleeding, he sings
Operator halted.  Star Trek is on.
Operator...give me the no for 911, quick!
Operator? Give me the number for nine-one-one!!
Opinions cannot survive if one has no chance to fight for them. Thomas Mann
Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.
Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment. Ducharme's Precept
Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work. Thomas Alva Edison, amedican inventor and industrialist
Oprah spelled backwards is Harpo!
Optical mice have no balls!
Optimist is person who thinks he can break up traffic jam by blowing horn.
Optimist: Commodore computer salesman with a beeper.
Optimist: a proponent of the doctrine that black is white. Ambrose Bierce
Optimization hinders evolution.
Or kill me.
Or not.
Or peace like retarded pygmies. Lester Bowles Pearson
Orcs really aren't so bad (if you use lots of catsup).
Orcs really aren't so bad (if you use lots of ketchup).
Oregon, n.: Eighty billion gallons of water with no place to go on Saturday night.
Oregonians don't tan, they rust.
Organic chemistry is the chemistry of carbon compounds. Biochemistry is the study of carbon compounds that crawl. | Mike Adams
Organized crime constitutes nothing less than a guerilla war against society. Lyndon Baines Johnson
Originality is nothing but judicious imitation. Voltaire
Originality is simply a pair of fresh eyes. Thomas Wentworth Higginson
Originality is the art of concealing your source...
Originality is the art of concealing your sources.
Originality is undetected plagiarism.
Originality: Undetected plagarism.
Osborn's Law: Variables won't; constants aren't.
Ostentation is the signal flag of hypocrisy. Edwin Hubbel Chapin
Ostrich: He often runs so fast he leaves himself behind.
Other men live to eat, while I eat to live!!!
Other men's sins are before our eyes; our own are behind our backs. Seneca
Other people's tools work only in other people's gardens.
Other than that, how'd you like the play, Mrs. Lincoln ?
Other times, other customs.
Others look to you for stability, so hide when you bite your nails.
Others will look to you for stability, so hide when you bite your nails.
Ouch And I mean it.
Our Mission: To Boldly stay home and read mail off line.
Our OS which art in CPU - UNIX be thy name .....
Our OS who art in CPU, UNIX be thy name. Thy programs run, thy syscalls done, in kernel as it is in user
Our best thoughts come from others. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Our birth is nothing but our death begun, As tapers waste the moment they take fire. Edward Young
Our bodies are apt to be our autobiographies. Frank Gelett Burgess
Our body is a well-set clock, which keeps good time, but if it be too much or indiscreetly tampered with, the alarm runs out before the hour. Joseph Hall
Our country has plenty of good five-cent cigars, but the trouble is they charge fifteen cents for them.
Our country, right or wrong. When right, to be kept right; when wrong, to be put right. Carl Schurz
Our delight in any particular study, art, or science rises and improves in proportion to the application which we bestow upon it. Thus, what was at first an exercise becomes at length an entertainment. Joseph Addison
Our desires always disappoint us; for though we meet with something that gives us satisfaction, yet it never thoroughly answers our expectation. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Our destiny changes with our thought; we shall become what we wish to become, do what we wish to do, when our habitual thought corresponds with our desire. Orison S. Marden
Our dignity is not in what we do, but what we understand. George Santayana
Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt. William Shakespeare
Our earth is but a small star in a great universe. Yet of it we can make, if we choose, a planet unvexed by war, untroubled by hunger or fear, undivided by senseless distinctions of race, color or theory. Stephen Vincent Bent
Our elections are free, it's in the results where eventually we pay. Bill Stern
Our faith comes in moments; our vice is habitual. William Ellery Channing
Our faith in the present dies out long before our faith in the future. Ruth Benedict
Our father who art in Redmond, hallowed be thy DOS
Our future is always uncertain our end is always too near
Our grand business is not to see what lies dimly at a distance, but to do what lies clearly at hand. Thomas Carlyle
Our greatest glory consists not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. Oliver Goldsmith
Our greatest weariness comes from work not done. Eric Hoffer
Our high respect for a well-read man is praise enough of literature. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Our hope of immortality does not come from any religions, but nearly all religions come from that hope. Robert Green Ingersoll
Our houseplants have a good sense of humous.
Our liberty depends on the freedom of the press, and that cannot be limited without being lost. Thomas Jefferson
Our national debt, after all, is an internal debt, owed not only by the nation but to the nation. If our children have to pay the interest they will pay that interest to themselves. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
Our national flower is the concrete cloverleaf. Lewis Mumford
Our necessities are few but our wants are endless. Josh Billings
Our necessities are few but our wants are endless...
Our necessities never equal our wants. Benjamin Franklin
Our own grief produces pity for another.
Our parents were never our age.
Our passions are like convulsion fits, which, though they make us stronger for the time, leave us the weaker ever after. Jonathan Swift
Our patience will achieve more than our force. Edmund Burke
Our pleasures are imagined, but our griefs are all real.
Our policy is, when in doubt, do the right thing. | Roy L. Ash, ex-president Litton Industries
Our pond has ducks.  Really anti-social ducks.
Our problems are man-made, therefore they may be solved by man. No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings. John F. Kennedy
Our progress as a nation can be no swifter than our progress in education. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
Our real enemies are the people who make us feel so good that we are slowly, but inexorably, pulled down into the quicksand of smugness and self-satisfaction. Sydney Harris
Our real problem, then, is not our strength today; it is rather the vital necessity of action today to ensure our strength tomorrow. Dwight D. Eisenhower
Our strength is often composed of the weakness we're damned if we're going to show. Mignon McLaughlin
Our swords shall play the orators for us.
Our viewers need proof!
Our warranty doesn't cover fire, theft, or acts of dog.
Our water pressure is so low, you have to run around in the shower to get wet.| Peter Campbell
Our wretched species is so made that those who walk on the well-trodden path always throw stones at those who are showing a new road. Voltaire
Ours is a world where people don't know what they want and are willing to go through hell to get it.
Ours is a world where people don't know what they want and are willing to go through hell to get it. Don Marquis
Out of sight, out of mind == Invisible idiot| Chinese translator
Out of sight, out of mind Proverb
Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls. Edwin Hubbel Chapin
Out of the mouths of babes does often come cereal.
Out to Lunch. If not back by 5, then Out to dinner.
Out to lunch. If not back by 6 pm, out to dinner also.
Outlaw junk mail, and save the trees
Outlaw junk mail, and save the trees!
Outside noisy, inside empty.
Outside of a dog, a book is your best friend, and inside of a dog, it's too dark to read. Groucho Marx
Outward judgment often fails, inward judgment never. Theodore Parker
Over 49.99% of all people are below average.
Over grown military establishments are under any form of government inauspicious to liberty, and are to be regarded as particularly hostile to republican liberty. George Washington
Overcome by jealousy, Data dismembers the Energizer Bunny
Overdo-It-Yourself!
Overdrawn?  But I still have checks left
Overestimation: Thinking that all your geese are swans.
Overflow on /dev/null, please empty the bit bucket.
Overload -- core meltdown sequence initiated.
Overload--core meltdown sequence initiated.
Ow. I believe I have overexerted myself.| Data
Oxymoron #40:  Ironclad Guarantee
Oxymoron - Definite possibility
Oxymoron - Military Intelligence
Oxymoron :  Ironclad Guarantee.
Oxymoron: Advanced BASIC.
Oxymoron: Bosnian Cease-Fire
Oxymoron: Soviet Union.
Oxymoron: Term meaning stupid as an Ox.
Oxymoron: Windows Productivity.
Oxymoron: one who has used too much acne goo?
Oxymorons... "military intelligence" and "tech support"
P Revere: "One if by Lan, two if by 'C'"
P'grammers dont change lite b; that's a hardware pblm
P'tang!
P-K4.
PAIN, n. An uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that is being done to the body, or may be purely mental, caused by the good fortune of another. Ambrose Bierce
PAINTING, n, The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic. Ambrose Bierce
PARKINSON'S FIRST LAW: Work expands to fill available time.
PARKINSON'S SECOND LAW: Expenditures rise to meet income.
PAS_AL, BASI_, & _OBOL...  C fills all the gaps !
PATH=harddrive;drawer;desktop;pocket;boxincloset;boxunder
PATIENCE-A Virtue That Carries A Lot Of Wait
PATTON'S LAW: A good plan today is better than a perfect plan tomorrow.
PAUL'S LAW: Don't force it, get a bigger hammer.
PAUL'S SECOND LAW: You need a bigger hammer.
PAUL'S THIRD LAW: If it breaks, you used too big a hammer.
PC RAID... Kills program bugs, DEAD!
PCBackup: 1 of 1362 disks.
PCMCIA - People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
PCs are OK except when you use them as bowling balls.
PEACENIKS; Demonstrate in a dictatorship!!!!
PEER'S LAW: The solution to a problem changes the nature of the problem.
PENNY'S LAW: You can fool all of the people some of the time and some all of the time, but you can't fool Mom.
PERKINS' POSTULATE: The bigger they are...the harder they hit.
PERSONAL COMPUTING : A Terminal Disease.
PESSIMAL [Latin-based antonym for 'optimal'] adj. Maximally bad. "This is a pessimal situation."
PESSIMIZING COMPILER n. A compiler that produces object code that is worse than the straightforward or obvious translation.
PHILOSOPHY, n. A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing. Ambrose Bierce
PI seconds is a nanocentury. - Tom Duff, Bell Labs
PIMP: a fornicaterer.
PISCES (Feb. 19 - Mar. 20) You have a vivid imagination and often think you are being followed by the CIA or FBI.  You have minor influence over your associates and people resent your flaunting of your power.  You lack confidence and you are generally a coward.  Pisces people do terrible things to small animals.
PKZip - it's not just for downloads anymore
PL/1, "the fatal disease", belongs more to the problem set than to the solution set. | E. W. Dijkstra
PLATITUDE, An idea (a) that is admitted to be true by everyone, and (b) that is not true. H.L. Mencken
PLEASE LOG OFF!.... NOW ! ! !
PLEASE LOG OFF.... NOW
PMS- Presentation Manager Syndrome.
POLITICS: Poli = Poly = Many, Tics = Blood Suckers.
POPs+OOPs+C==C++
PORKINGHAM'S FISHING PHILOSOPHY: The worse your line is tangled, the better is the fishing around you.
PORKINGHAM'S LAW: The time available to go fishing shrinks as fishing season draws near.
PREDICTION: You are reading messages right now.
PREGNANCY: When he was poking her in fun and she took him seriously!
PRICE'S LAW: If everybody doesn't want it, nobody gets it.
PRINTER : A computer accessory for destroying forests.
PROFESSORS BLOCK'S MOTTO: Forgive and Remember.
PROGRAM n.: used to turn valid data into error messages.
PROGRAM v. : act similar to beating your head against awall.
PURGE COMPLETE.
PURITANISM: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy. H. L. Mencken
PUT THE COMPUTER DOWN, HONEY..I'm quitting NOW!
Pagan Missionary
Pagan and Proud
Pagans do it in the Woad
Pain adds rest unto pleasure, and teaches the luxury of health. Martin F. Tupper
Pain and pleasure, like light and darkness, succeed each other. Laurence Sterne
Pain dies quickly, and lets her weary prisoners go; the fiercest agonies have shortest reign. William Cullen Bryant
Pain is forgotten; insult lingers on.
Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.
Pain is inevitable. Misery, however, is an option.
Pain is just God's way of hurting you.
Pain is lifethe sharper, the more evidence of life. Charles Lamb
Pain makes man think. Thought makes man wise. Wisdom makes life endurable. John Patrick
Paint the top end red, then dap white and black with a small sponge to give the 'ash' effect. Democratic National Committee, from instructions on making a 'Mr Butt Man' walking cigarette to follow around Republican Presidential Candidate Bob Dole, 1996
Palindrome isn't one.
Pandemonium did not reign; it poured. John Kendrick Bangs
Pandemonium doesn't reign here... It pours!
Panic: can't find  rm -rf *
Pants: Trousers' country cousins.
Paper clips are the larval stage of coat hangers.
Parallel processors share the task.
Paramedics are patient people.
Paranoia doesn't mean the whole world really isn't out to get you.
Paranoia is heightened awareness.
Paranoia is simply an optimistic outlook on life.
Paranoid: someone who just figured out what's going on.
Paranoids are never alone.
Paranoids are people, too; they have their own problems.  It's easy to criticize, but if everybody hated you, you'd be paranoid too. | D. J. Hicks
Pardon me miss, but I help noticing that you have cum in your hair.|Pick up line
Pardon me, I've been BBSing.
Pardon me, but there is a multi-legged creature on your shoulder. -- Spock
Pardon me, but your shoe is ringing...
Pardon me, do you have any grey poop on?
Pardon my driving, I'm trying to reload.
Parenthood-Feeding the mouth that bites you!
Parents like the idea of kids, they just don't like their kids. Morley Saefer, Journalist, on Politically Incorrect, 1995
Parents: One of the hardships of a minor's life.
Pareto Phenomenon:  Very few things seem to contribute to a majority of problems.
Parker's Law: Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.
Parsley is gharsley.
Part-time musicians are semiconductors.
Partial culture runs to the ornate; extreme culture to simplicity. Christian Nestell Bovee
Parts that positively cannot be assembled in improper order will be.
Party honesty is party expediency. Grover Cleveland
Party is the madness of many, for the gains of a few. Alexander Pope
Pascal Users: To show respect for the 313th anniversary (tomorrow) of the death of Blaise Pascal, your programs will be run at half speed.
Pascal, n.: A programming language named after a man who would turn over in his grave if he knew about it.
Pascal:  What's it Wirth?
Pascal: A programming language named after a man who would turn over in his grave if he knew about it.
Pass by the open WINDOWS
Passion is the mob of the man, that commits a riot upon his reason. William Penn
Passion is universal humanity. Without it religion, history, romance and art would be useless. Honor de Balzac
Passion makes idiots of the cleverest men, and makes the biggest idiots clever. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Passion, though a bad regulator, is a powerful spring. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Passionate hatred can give meaning and purpose to an empty life. | Eric Hoffer
Passover affirms the great truth that liberty is the inalienable right of every human being. Morris Joseph
Password:
Passwords are implemented as a result of insecurity.
Passwords? -- We don' need no steenkin passwords!
Patch griefs with proverbs.
Path = Wandering Considerably.
Patience - a minor form of despair disguised as a virtue.
Patience -- Wait control
Patience NOW!
Patience abused becomes fury.
Patience and time do more than strength or passion. Jean de La Fontaine
Patience is a minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue. Ambrose Bierce
Patience is a virgin.
Patience is a virtue that carries a lot of WAIT!
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. Jean Jacques Rousseau
Patience is power; with time and patience the mulberry leaf becomes silk. Chinese Proverb
Patience is the best remedy for every trouble.
Patience makes a woman beautiful in middle age. Elliot Paul
Patriotism is easy to understand in America; it means looking out for yourself by looking out for your country. Calvin Coolidge
Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel. Samuel Johnson
Paul Revere was a tattle-tale
Paul is dead.
Paul's Law: In America, it's not how much an item costs, it's how much you save.
Paul's Law: You can't fall off the floor.
Paul, George, and Ringo are recording a song using the last of John's unreleased tapes. It goes 'Hello, this is the Lennon residence, I can't come to the phone right now...' Chris Cox, Congressman, during an appearance on 'Politically Incorrect', 1995
Pause for storage relocation.
Pave the bay.
Pay no attention to that man behind the curtains.
Pay quickly what thou owest. The needy tradesman is made glad by such considerate haste. Walter Smith
Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse. - Groucho Marx
Peace cannot be achieved through violence, it can only be attained through understanding. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Peace has its victories no less than war, but it doesn't have as many monuments to unveil. Kin Hubbard
Peace is not an absence of war, it is a virtue, a state of mind, a disposition for benevolence, confidence, justice. Baruch Spinoza
Peace is not the absence of conflict but the ability to cope with it.
Peace is rarely denied to the peaceful. Johann von Schiller
Peace is the one condition of survival in this nuclear age. Adlai E. Stevenson
Peace through superior firepower.
Peace, above all things, is to be desired, but blood must sometimes be spilled to obtain it on equable and lasting terms. Andrew Jackson
Peace, in international affairs, is a period of cheating between two periods of fighting. Ambrose Bierce
Peace, n.: In international affairs, a period of cheating between two periods of fighting. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Peace: A period of cheating between two periods of fighting.
Peacetime conscription is the greatest step toward regimentation and militarism ever undertaken by the Congress of the United States. Burton Kendall Wheeler
Peanut butter.
Peanut prizes inspire monkey contestants.
Peanuts: The Drinking Man's Filter.
Pecor's Health-Food Principle: Never eat rutabaga on any day of the week that has a "y" in it.
Pedal to the Metal
Pee wee would write, but he does not have a free hand!
Penetration seems a kind of inspiration; it gives me an idea of prophecy. Fulke Greville
Pennies do not come from heaven-they have to be earned here on earth. Margaret Thatcher
Penny for your thoughts. Hey ! I deserve change !
Pentium-Based Science Fiction:  Deep Space 8.999309849...
People Can't live with em, Can't live without em
People are always available for work in the past tense.
People are always available for work in the past tense. Zymurgy's Law of Volunteer Labour
People are boring. Computers are fun.
People are funny. Put a sign saying "WET PAINT" on a door and they will have to make a personal  investigation.
People are funny. Tell them there is 400k of space left on a disk and they will believe you.
People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges. Joseph F. Newton
People are still having sex.
People are the only creatures with the power of laughter.
People are very open-minded about new thingsas long as they're exactly like the old ones. Charles F. Kettering
People can be very frightened of change. | Kirk STVI
People change and forget to tell each other. Lillian Hellman
People come to Washington believing it is the center of power. I know I did. It was only much later that I learned that Washington is a steering wheel that's not connected to an engine. Richard Goodwin
People do not deserve good writing, they are so pleased with bad. Ralph Waldo Emerson
People do not lack strength; they lack will. Victor Hugo
People do not seem to realize that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character. Ralph Waldo Emerson
People forget how fast you did a job, but remember how well you did it.
People generally quarrel because they cannot argue. Gilbert K. Chesterton
People have not been horrified by war to a sufficient extent ... War will exist until that distant day when the conscientious objector enjoys the same reputation and prestige`e as the warrior does today. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
People have one thing in common: they are all different.
People humiliating a salami
People humiliating a salami!
People let me tell ya 'bout my best friend
People like you because they realize you are better than them.
People of mediocre ability sometimes achieve outstanding success because they don't know when to quit. Most men succeed because they are determined to. George Allen
People often find it easier to be a result of the past than a cause of the future.
People say I'm apathetic, but I don't care.
People say I'm indecisive, but I'm not so sure.
People say I'm indecisive. Am I? I don't know.
People say New Yorkers can't get along. Not true. I saw two New Yorkers, complete strangers, sharing a cab. One guy took the tires and the radio; the other guy took the engine. David Letterman, commedian, 1995
People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have been left out of the pleasure. Russel Baker
People seldom improve when they have no other model but themselves to copy after. Oliver Goldsmith
People seldom plan to fail, but they often fail to plan.
People seldom want to walk over you until you lie down.
People should be measured in feats, not feet.
People smart enough to give good advice are usually smart enough to give none.
People think we make $3 million and $4 million a year. They don't realize that most of us only make $500,000. Pete Incaviglia, baseball player, 1990
People usually get what's coming to them ... unless it's been mailed.
People usually get what's coming to them ... unless it's been mailed.
People usually get what's coming to them, unless it's been mailed.
People who are grateful are usually good.
People who are smart get into Mensa. People who are really smart look around and leave. James Randi
People who bite the hand that feeds them usually lick the boot that kicks them. Eric Hoffer
People who can least afford to pay rent pay rent.
People who can most afford to pay rent build equity.
People who claim they don't let little things bother them have never slept in a room with a single mosquito.
People who demand neutrality in any situation are usually not neutral but in favor of the status quo. Max Eastman
People who eat snails are slime!!
People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes. Abigail Van Buren
People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.
People who gleet in glass houses, shouldn't!
People who go to conferences are the ones who shouldn't. | Ozman's Law
People who have no faults are terrible; there is no way of taking advantage of them.
People who have what they want are very fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they don't want it. | Ogden Nash
People who insist on telling their dreams are among the terrors of the breakfast table. Max Beerbohm
People who kill people give guns a bad name.
People who live in glass houses shouldn't.
People who live in stone houses shouldn't throw glasses.
People who pun deserve to be drawn and quoted...
People who say they sleep like a baby, usually don't have one.| Leo J. Burke
People who sell jacuzzis are used to being in hot water.
People who stay in the middle of the road usually get run over.
People who take cat naps don't usually sleep in a cat's cradle.
People will accept your ideas much more readily if you tell them that Benjamin Franklin said it first.
People will believe anything if you whisper it.
People will buy anthing that is 'one to a customer.' Sinclair Lewis
People will buy anything that's one to a customer.
People will buy anything that's one to a customer.
People will die this year that never died before
People will frighten you about a graduation....They use words you don't hear often... 'And we wish you Godspeed.' It is a warning, Godpeed. It means you are no longer welcome here at these prices. Bill Cosby, actor, author and commedian, Southern Methodist University Graduation, 1995
People will laugh at you, but let not that prevent you.
People will remember you better if you always wear the same outfit.
People with narrow minds usually have broad tongues.
People with narrow minds usually have broad tongues. Anonymous
People with no faults are terrible; there is no way of taking advantage of them
People would be alive if there were a death penality
Pereant, inquit, qui ante nos nostra dixerunt. "Confound those who have said our remarks before us." | Aelius Donatus
Perestrika... Llibertat... Demana PAU, au!
Perfect day for scrubbing the floor and other exciting things.
Perfect paranoia is perfect awareness.
Perfect virtue is to do unwitnessed that which we should be capable of doing before all the world. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Perfection is attained by slow degrees; it requires the hand of time. Voltaire
Perfume: any smell that is used to drown a worse one. Elbert Hubbard
Perhaps America will one day go fascist democratically, by popular vote. William L. Shirer
Perhaps a child who is fussed over gets a feeling of destiny, he thinks he is in the world for something important and it gives him drive and confidence. Dr. Benjamin Spock
Perhaps it was because Nero played the fiddle that they burned Rome.
Perhaps no mightier conflict of mind occurs ever again in a lifetime than that first decision to unseat one's own tooth. Gene Fowler
Perhaps the reward of the spirit who tries is not the goal but the exercise. E. V. Cooke
Perhaps the truth depends on a walk around the lake. Wallace Stevens
Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it merely had been detected. Oscar Wilde
Periods of tranquility are seldom prolific of creative achievement. Mankind has to be stirred up. Alfred North Whitehead
Permanent solutions never work.
Permission for lip to wobble, Sir?
Perot/Bush/Quayle: The Milionaire, Skipper & Gilligan.
Perplexity is the beginning of knowledge. Kahlil Gibran
Perseverance is more prevailing than violence; and many things which cannot be overcome when they are together yield themselves up when taken little by little. Plutarch
Perseverance is the most overrated of traits, if it is unaccompanied by talent; beating your head against a wall is more likely to produce a concussion in the head than a hole in the wall. Sydney Harris
Personality is to a man what perfume is to a flower. Charles M. Schwab
Personally, I don't believe in atheists.
Personally, I hold that a man, who deliberately and intelligently takes a pledge and then breaks it, forfeits his manhood. Mahatma Gandhi
Personally, I rather look forward to a computer program winning the world chess championship. Humanity needs a lesson in humility. Richard Dawkins
Personally, I'm always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught Sir Winston Churchill
Persuasion is better than force.
Pessimism is only the name that men of weak nerves give to wisdom. Bernard De Voto
Pet Store: "Buy one, get one flea."
Peter Norton is the "Betty Crocker" of software
Peter's Law of Substitution: Look after the molehills, and the mountains will look after themselves.
Peters hungry, time to eat lunch.
Petroleum and coffee had no value a few centuries ago.
Pets are not just for Christmas, but for a LIFETIME
Pets are the soul of the household
Pets: pure love contained in soft packages.
Petting: A study of anatomy in braille...
Petty laws breed great crimes. Ouida
PhD: Piled Higher and Deeper!
Phasers don't kill people...Unless you set them too high
Phasors locked on target, Captain.
Philadelphia Pa... We Bomb our Citizens
Philadelphia is not dull -- it just seems so because it is next to exciting Camden, New Jersy.
Philadelphia just seems dull because it's next to exciting Camden, New Jersey.
Philanthropist, n. A rich (and usually bald) old gentleman who has trained himself to grin while his conscience is picking his pocket. Ambrose Bierce
Philogyny recapitulates erogeny; erogeny recapitulates philogyny.
Philosophic enjoyment = mutual  misunderstanding.
Philosophy Philosophy: unintelligible answers to insoluble problems. Henry Brooks Adams
Philosophy goes no further than probabilities, and in every assertion keeps a doubt in reserve. James A. Froude
Philosophy is a game with objectives and no rules. Anonymous
Philosophy is a walk on the slippery rocks.
Philosophy is an unusually ingenious attempt to think fallaciously. Bertrand Russell
Philosophy is the science which considers truth. Aristotle
Philosophy triumphs easily over past and over future evils, but present evils triumph over philosophy. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Philosophy, when superficially studied, excites doubt; when thoroughly explored, it dispels it. Francis Bacon
Philosophy:  unintelligible answers to insoluble problems.
Philosophy: A route leading from nowhere to nothing.
Phobia -- what you have left over after you drink two out of a 6-pack.
Phone call for cbh.
Photographers do it in dark rooms.
Photographers do it with a shutter.
Photons have mass?  I didn't even know they were Catholic.
Physicists and astronomers see their own implications in the world being round, but to me it means that only one-third of the world is asleep at any given time and the other two-thirds is up to something. Dean Rusk
Pi R squared.  Nooo!  Pie R round, cornbread R square!
Pi R squared. Nooo!  Pie R round, Cornbread R squared!
Pi aren't square! Cornbread are square!
Picard to Lwaxana: "Not THAT kind of 'Engage'"
Picard to bridge, where am I?
Picard, you cheated...I'm impressed   Q
Pick a window........you're going through it.
Piety requries us to honor truth above friends. | Aristotle
Pilgrims may follow but there can only be one Columbus.
Pilots are just plane folks.
Pine Trees are fine trees!
Pioneers are the ones with the arrows in their backs.
Pipe gives wise man time to think and fool something to stick in mouth.
Pipe-smokers spend so much time cleaning, filling and fooling with their pipes, they don't have time to get into mischief. Bill Vaughan
Pirates, they're recking it for everyone!
Piss on you, I'm workin' for Mel Brooks!
Pitchfork:  a device for collecting dead babies
Pithy sentences are like sharp nails which force truth upon our memory. Denis Diderot
Pity costs nothing, and it ain't worth nothing. Josh Billings
Pity is best taught by fellowship in woe. Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Pity is not natural to man. Children and savages are always cruel. Pity is acquired and improved by the cultivation of reason. We may have uneasy sensations from seeing a creature in distress, without pity; but we have not pity unless we wish to relieve him. Samuel Johnson
Pity the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. Don Marquis
Pity the poor egg: it only gets laid once.
Pizza IS the four food groups!
Pizza always burns the roof of your mouth. | Ozman's Law
Pizza: Nature's perfect food.
Place written complaint and proof here====>[]
Plagarism prohibited.  Derive carefully.
Plagerism is the sincerest form of flattery.
Plagiarism prohibited, derive carefully.
Plain dealing is more often praised than practiced.
Plain women know more about men than beautiful women do. Katharine Hepburn
Plan your work for today and every day, then work your plan. Norman Vincent Peale
Planned Parenthood is nothing of the sort.
Planned parenthood --- the impossible dream.
Plasma is another matter.
Plastic explosives will be appropriate later in the week.
Plastic packaged foods are very uncanny.
Play it again, Sam...
Play poker with Tarot cards. Got a flush. 5 people died.
Please Hold...
Please Lord, let me prove to you that winning the lottery won't spoil me. (Anonymous t-shirt plea), Wireless catalog, 1994
Please Tell Me if you Don't Get This Message
Please all, and you will please none.
Please baby, please baby, baby baby please baby.| Spike Lee
Please cut my pizza in six slices - I can't eat eight.
Please disregard the previous fortune cookie.
Please do not shoot the pianist.  He is doing his best.
Please do not shoot the pianist. He is doing his best. Oscar Wilde, from Impressions of America (quoting someone in 'Leadville')
Please don't drink and post.
Please don't filter this twit
Please don't spoil everything by telling me the truth.
Please don't yell at me.  I'm new at this.
Please excuse my driving, I'm trying to reload.
Please follow more cautiously Life's Golden Rule.
Please go away.
Please help me to be patient. And Hurry!
Please hold, a representative will annoy you shortly.
Please ignore previous fortune.
Please keep your hands off the secretary's reproducing equipment.
Please leave deposit in appropriate bank...
Please let me know if you did not receive this.
Please note that on page 124 of Abstraction in the Twentieth Century, Mark Rothko's Black, Ochre, Red over Red, is reproduced upside down. Guggenheim Museum, from an exhibit catalog, 1996
Please recycle this tagline.  Once is not enough.
Please return stewardess to original upright position.
Please say it isn't so!!!
Please steal this tagline, and spread it around the world.
Please take cash.
Please take note:
Please think when you drink....
Please update your programs.
Please wait ONE HOUR before replying...
Please wait... Sysop has exited to DOS...
Please!  Do not break character!
Please! Don't unzip here! I'm bashful!
Please! Take my word for it.
Please, O ye Lord, keep Jim Bakker behind bars. Dana Carvey, commedian, 1992
Please, Please, no more of this music. (Anonymous Radio Listener), in France, after French DJ's dusted off old disco records to satisfy new domestic content laws, 1996
Please, doctor, not while my wife is on board. | O'Brien
Please, won't somebody tell me what diddie-wa-diddie means?
Pleasure is the start and end of living happily. | Epicurus
Pleasure's couch is virtue's grave. Augustine J. Duganne
Plerique amicos, tanquam pecudes, eos potissium
Plough deep while sluggards sleep. Benjamin Franklin
Plow a straight furrow and you're in a rut.
Plus e la change, plus c'est la mm chose
Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis
Pobody's Nerfect!
Poetry comes nearer to vital truth than history. Plato
Poetry is boned with ideas, nerved and blooded with emotions, all held together by the delicate, tough skin of words. Paul Engle
Poetry is the art of substantiating shadows, and of lending existence to nothing. Edmund Burke
Poetry is the utterance of deep and heart-felt truththe true poet is very near the oracle. Edwin Hubbel Chapin
Poetry: the best words in the best order. Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Poets go from bad to verse
Pohl's law: Nothing is so good that somebody, somewhere, will not hate it.
Point not found. A)bort, R)eread, I)gnore.
Poise is the act of raising the eyebrows instead of the roof.
Poker Face: The face that launched a thousand chips.
Poker: It's darkest just before you've drawn.
Polaroid: What a polar bear gets from sitting on ice.
Polite conversation is seldom either.
Politeness is the art of choosing among your thoughts.
Politeness, n: The most acceptable hypocrisy.
Political Correctness is a Borg plot.
Political T.V. commercials prove one thing: some candidates can tell all their good points and qualifications in just 30 seconds.
Political panjandrums prologize pedantic paronomasia.
Political power grows out of the barrel of a gun.
Politically Correct Tagline
Politically Incorrect -- and damn proud of it
Politically incorrect and DAMNED proud of it !
Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river. Nikita Khrushchev
Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge where there is no river. Nikita Krushchev
Politics are almost as exciting as war, and quite as dangerous. In war you can only be killed once, but in politics many times. Sir Winston Churchill
Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated. Will Rogers
Politics is a profession; a serious, complicated and, in its true sense, a noble one. Dwight D. Eisenhower
Politics is about people making money cutting other people's jobs.
Politics is like coaching a football team.  you have to be smart enough to understand the game but not smart enough to lose interest.
Politics is not a game. It is an earnest business. Winston Churchill
Politics is not an exact science. Otto von Bismarck
Politics is perhaps the only profession for which no preparation is thought necessary. Robert Louis Stevenson
Politics is the art of the possible. Otto von Bismarck
Politics is the conduct of public affairs for private advantage. Ambrose Bierce
Politics is the entertainment branch of industry.
Politics is the only profession where no preparation is thought necessary.
Politics is the skilled use of blunt objects. Lester Pearson
Politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. Charles de Gaulle
Politics is war without bloodshed while war is politics with bloodshed. Mao Tse-tung, revolutionary and party chairman
Politics makes strange bed-fellows. Charles Dudley Warner
Politics: (noun) From Greek, poly, meaning many, and ticks, meaning bloodsuckers. Anon
Politics: Passing the buck or passing the doe.
Politics: Poli=Many, Tics=Blood sucking parasites.
Politics: Poly (many) + Ticks (blood-sucking parasites)
Politics: The glad hand and the marble heart.
Polls show 4 out of 5 people lie to poll-takers.
Polluting New Jersey... like who's gonna notice?
Polymer physicists are into chains.
Pontius Pilate was the first great censor, and Jesus Christ the first great victim of censorship. Ben Lindsay
Popular opinion is the greatest lie in the world. Thomas Carlyle
Popularity is exhausting. The life of the party almost always winds up in a corner with an overcoat over him. Wilson Mizner
Popularity is glory's small change. Victor Hugo
Population, when unchecked, increases in a geometrical ratio. Thomas Robert Malthus
Pornography? We don't even have a pornograph!
Porsche - there is no substitute.
Positive anything is better than negative nothing. Elbert Hubbard
Positive expectations yield negative results.
Positive: Mistaken at the top of one's voice.
Positively NO TAGS ALLOWED HERE!!!!!
Possession, n. The whole of the law.
Possessions, outward success, publicity, luxuryto me these have always been contemptible. I believe that a simple and unassuming manner of life is best for every one, best for both the body and the mind. Albert Einstein
Postscript,..Prescript,..what's the difference?
Postscript: The only thing of interest in some letters.
Pound forehead on keyboard to continue...
Pound forehead on keyboard to continue.t.
Poverty ... It is life near the bone, where it is sweetest. Henry David Thoreau
Poverty and love are hard to hide.
Poverty is the openmouthed relentless hell which yawns beneath civilized society. And it is hell enough. Henry George
Poverty is the root of all evil.
Poverty is the step-mother of genius. Josh Billings
Poverty often deprives a man of all spirit and virtue; it is hard for an empty bag to stand upright. Benjamin Franklin
Power attracts the corruptable.
Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.
Power corrupts, but we need electricity.
Power corrupts, but we still need electricity.
Power corrupts.  Absolute power is kinda neat, though...
Power corrupts.  Absolute power is kinda neat.
Power corrupts.  Absolute power is kinda neat....
Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat. John Lehman-US secretary of the navy
Power corrupts. Absolute power is kinda neat.
Power does not corrupt fools, but fools corrupt power.
Power is an illusion; only stupidity is real.
Power is poison.
Power means not having to respond.
Power outage at a department store yesterday, Twenty people were trapped on the escalators. Stephen Wright
Power tends to corrupt; absolute power corrupts absolutely.
Power, n: The only narcotic regulated by the SEC instead of the FDA.
PowerPC:  No Intel Inside
Practical people would be more practical if they would take a little more time for dreaming. | J. P. McEvoy
Practical prayer is harder on the soles of your shoes than on the knees of your trousers. Austin O'Malley
Practice makes perfect Proverb
Practice makes perfect, but no one's perfect, so why practice?
Practice random kindness & senseless acts of beauty.
Practice safe eating: use condiments.
Practice safe fax...ALWAYS use a cover slip.
Practice what you preach Proverb
Practice yourself what you preach.
Practiss makes perfict.
Praise "Bob"!
Praise a wife but remain a bachelor.
Praise the lord and pass the ammunition.
Praise the sea; on shore remain.
Praise: What you receive when you are no longer alive.
Pray as if everything depended on God, and work as if everything depended upon man. Francis Cardinal Spellman
Pray for Ted Turner, he's in need!!
Pray for great things, but above all, Pray!
Pray for the success of atheism.
Pray for what you want but work for what you need.
Pray to God, but hammer away. Spanish Proverb
Pray, pray very much; but beware of telling God what you want. French Proverb
Prayer is a confession of one's own unworthiness and weakness. Mahatma Gandhi
Prayer is the key of the morning and the bolt of the evening. Mahatma Gandhi
Prayer will be in schools as long as exams are!
Precinct toilets stolen! Police have nothing to go on.
Predestination was doomed from the start.
Predicting the future of technology is fraud with peril!
Prejudice is a raft onto which the shipwrecked mind clambers and paddles to safety. Ben Hecht
Prejudice is being down on something you're not up on. Anonymous
Prejudice is the child of ignorance.
Prejudice is the reason of fools. | Voltaire.
Prejudice, which sees what it pleases, cannot see what is plain. Aubrey T. de Vere
Prejudices, it is well known, are most difficult to eradicate from the heart whose soil has never been loosened or fertilized by education; they grow there, firm as weeds among rocks. Charlotte Bronte
Premature withdrawal may lead to loss of interest.
Prepare to meet thy GOD! (Evening dress optional)
Preserve the old, but know the new.
Preserve wildlife... pickle a sqirrel.
President Reagan has noted that there are too many economic pundits and forecasters and has decided on an excess prophets tax.
President Thieu says he'll quit if he doesn't get more than 50% of the vote.  In a democracy, that's not called quitting. | The Washington Post
President means chief servant. Mahatma Gandhi
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Press any key to continue or any other key to quit
Press any key to continue, or any other key to quit...
Press any key... no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!
Press the "any key" to continue.
Press the button, my friend, send me back into time.
Pressed into service means pressed out of shape. Robert Frost
Pressure is the normal force acting upon an engineer.
Pretend to spank me - I'm a pseudo-masochist
Pretend to spank me -- I'm a pseudo-masochist
Pretension almost always overdoes the original, and hence exposes itself. Hosea Ballou
Prevent security leaks.
Preventing baldness is simple. just knot your hair from the inside.
Prevention is better than cure.
Pride and grace never dwell in one place.
Pride breakfasted with Plenty, dined with Poverty, supped with Infamy. Benjamin Franklin
Pride dines upon Vanity, sups on Contempt. -- Poor Richard.
Pride in prosperity becomes misery in adversity.
Pride invites calamity; humility reaps its harvest.
Pride is an admission of weakness; it secretly fears all competition and dreads all rivals. Fulton J. Sheen
Pride is seldom delicate; it will please itself with very mean advantages. Samuel Johnson
Pride is the master sin of the devil, and the devil is the father of lies. Edwin Hubbel Chapin
Pride is what we have...Vanity is what others have.
Prince, a precept I'd leave for you, Coined in Eden existing yet; Skirt the parlor, and shun the zoo, Women and elephants never forget. -Dorothy Parker, from Ballade of the Unfortunate Mammals
Principia Discordia, Or How I Found Goddess And What I Did To Her When I Found Her.
Printer paper is strongest at the perforation
Printers do it without wrinkling the sheets.
Printf("to C or not to C...that is the question/n");
Private property began the instant somebody had a mind of his own. e. e. cummings
Pro & con are opposites, what about progress & congress?
Pro Choice!
Pro football is like nuclear warfare. There are no winners, only survivors. Frank Gifford
Pro is to con as progress is to Congress
Pro is to con as progress is to Congress.
Probability is easy; either a thing will happen or it wont, so all probabilities are 50%.
Probable-Possible, my black hen, She lays eggs in the Relative When. She doesn't lay eggs in the Positive Now Because she's unable to postulate how. | Frederick Winsor
Problems which have arisen from the use of computers. The computers use of lot of electricity - well more than a filing cabinet.
Proceed with Caution - Twisted Mind Under Construction
Procrastination gives you something to look forward to. Joan Konner
Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday. Don Marquis
Procrastination means never having to say you're sorry.
Procrastination:  The art of keeping up with yesterday.
Procrastinators don't die, they keep putn' it off!
Production is the only answer to inflation. Chester Bowles
Profaneness is a brutal vice. He who indulges in it is no gentleman. Edwin Hubbel Chapin
Profanity is the linguistic crutch of inarticulate bastards.
Profanity is the one language all programmers know best.
Profanity: the universal programming language
Professional mail reader on closed modem. Do not attempt.
Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs. Ogden Nash
Professionals built the Titanic, amateurs built the ark.
Professor : a textbook wired for sound.
Program complexity grows until it exceeds the capabilities of the programmer who must maintain it. Laws of Computer Programming, VII
Program too small to fit into memory.
Programmer on Computer
Programmer's do it with bytes and nybbles....
Programmers do it in loops.
Programmers do it top down.
Programmers do it with their fingers.
Programmers don't Byte,they just Nybble a bit.
Programmers don't die, they GOSUB without RETURN
Programmers don't get sniffles, they get a CODE.
Programmers don't repeat themselves, they LOOP.
Programmers get overlaid!
Programmers get overlaid.
Programmers never die, they branch off to a new address
Programming Department: Mistakes made while you wait.
Programming Dept.: Mistakes made while you wait.
Programming _can_ be fun.
Programming department: Mistakes made while you wait.
Programs : the ones with bugs, and the ones with hidden bugs.
Programs. Ones w/bugs & ones w/hidden bugs.
Progress implies a direction.
Progress is made on alternate Fridays.
Progress is made on alternate Fridays. Weinberg's First Law
Progress is not created by contented people. Frank Tyger
Progress is the process whereby the human race is getting rid of whiskers, the veriform appendix and God. H. L. Mencken
Progress was all right. Only it went on too long. James Thurber
Progress was all right... only it went on too long.
Prolonged idleness paralyzes initiative. Anonymous
Promptness is its own reward, if one lives by the clock instead of the sword.
Pronounce your prepositions, damn it
Pronounce your prepositions, damn it!
Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
Propaganda must not serve the truth, especially insofar as it might bring out something favorable for the opponent. Adolf Hitler
Propaganda replaces moral philosophy. Hans J. Morgenthau
Property is the fruit of labor; property is desirable; it is a positive good in the world. Abraham Lincoln
Proposals, as understood by the proposer, will be judged otherwise by others.
Proposed NEW tax will pay the tax on the tax, supposedly.
Prosecutors will be violated
Prosperity doth best discover vice, but adversity doth best discover virtue. Francis Bacon
Prosperity is a great teacher; adversity is a greater. Possession pampers the mind; privation trains and strengthens it. William Hazlitt
Prosperity is not without many fears and distastes; adversity not without many comforts and hopes. Francis Bacon
Prosperity is only an instrument to be used, not a deity to be worshipped. Calvin Coolidge
Prosperity is something the businessmen created for politicians to take credit for. Brunswick (Ga.) Pilot
Prosperity is the surest breeder of insolence I know. Mark Twain
Prosperity makes friends, adversity tries them.
Prosperity makes friends, adversity tries them. Publilius Syrus
Prosthetic dog claws | From "101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR"
Protect your car: Use a club!
Prototype designs always work.
Proverbial excrement hits oscillating air device.
Providence protects children and idiots. I know because I have tested it. Mark Twain
Providence sees to it that no man gets happiness out of crime. Conte Vittorio Alfieri
Providing computer solutions for the mentally impaired...
Prudence is an attitude that keeps life safe, but does not often make it happy. Samuel Johnson
Prudent, cautious self-control Is wisdom's root. Robert Burns
Prune Farr: well, this could be disgusting.... <g>
Prune Juice. A warriors drink
Prune: A plum that has seen better days.
Prunes give you a run for your money.
Pssst Wanna buy a C compiler ?| Aldo
Pssst.	The root password is 'kumquat'.
Pssst.  Dennis Ritchie is a closet Pascal user!
Pssst. The root password is 'kumquat'.
Psst, your file is open.
Psychiairic: Wherever you go, Your not all there
Psychiatrists say that one out of four people are mentally ill.  Check three friends.  If they're ok, you're it.
Psychiatrists stay on your mind.
Psychiatry : the care of the Id by the Odd.
Psychiatry is the care of the id by the odd.
Psychic Con: You know where and when
Psychic Wanted:  Qualified person will know where to apply.
Psychics will lead dogs to your body.
Psychoanalysis is the mental illness it purports to cure. Karl Krauss
Psychoceramics:  The study of crackpots.
Psychoceramics: The study of crackpots.
Psychologists only do it if they feel good about it
Psychology: The art of turning stupidity into illness.
Public behavior is merely private character writ large. Stephen R. Covey, author, self-help speaker
Public confidence in the integrity of the Government is indispensable to faith in democracy; and when we lose faith in the system, we have lost faith in everything we fight and spend for. Adlai E. Stevenson
Public opinion is a weak tyrant, compared with our private opinionwhat a man thinks of himself, that is which determines, or rather indicates his fate. Henry David Thoreau
Public schools are the nurseries of all vice and immorality.
Public speaking is very easy. | Senator Dan Quayle
Publicity, publicity, PUBLICITY is the greatest moral factor and force in our public life. Joseph Pulitzer
Publishing a volume of verse is like dropping a rose petal down the Grand Canyon and waiting for the echo.
Publishing is the art of buying paper and selling it again at a profit.
Pull the wool over your own eyes.
Pull yourself together; things are not all that bad.
PumpDon'tWork'CauseTheVandalTookTheHandle
Pumpkin - American definition of incest.
Pun: the lowest form of humor, unless you thought of it first.
Punctuality is one of the cardinal business virtues: always insist on it in your subordinates. Don Marquis
Punctuality is the thief of time. Oscar Wilde
Punishment is justice for the unjust. Saint Augustine
Puns are bad, but poetry is verse.
Pure drivel tends to drive ordinary drivel off the T.V. screen.
Purity of mind and idleness are incompatible. Mahatma Gandhi
Purposelessness is the fruitful mother of crime. Charles H. Parkhurst
Push any key. Then push the any other key.
Push something hard enough and eventually it will fall over.
Push the limit, and the limit will move away!
Put 'em in the trunk.
Put a tiger in your tank - it's the ideal anti-personnel weapon for use in the small confines of military vehicles.
Put all your eggs in one basket, and WATCH THAT BASKET!
Put it before them briefly so they will read it, clearly so they will appreciate it, picturesquely so they will remember it and, above all, accurately so they will be guided by its light. Joseph Pulitzer
Put it to the wall, Mr. LaForge. | Picard
Put not your trust in money, but put your money in trust.
Put not your trust in money, but put your money in trust. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Put off procrastinating till a later time.
Put off thy cares with thy clothes; so shall thy rest strengthen thy labor, and so thy labor sweeten thy rest. Francis Quarles
Put on your seatbelt. I wanna try something.
Put on your seatbelt. I'm gonna try something new.
Put on your seatbelt...I wanna try
Put people on hold when possible.
Put that in your | and smoke it!
Put two pennies in pocket...they'll breed.
Put your Nose to the Grindstone | Amalgamated Plastic Surgeons and Toolmakers, Ltd.
Put your brain in gear before starting your mouth.
Put your genius into your life.  Put only your talent into your work.
Put your hand over your mouth when you sneeze; internal organs will be scarce in the post-nuclear age. | Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
Put your hard drive to your ear. Can you hear the C: ?
Put your nose to the grindstone and you're a bloody fool.
Put your trust in God - but keep your powder dry. Oliver Cromwell
Put your trust in God, but keep your powder dry. Oliver Cromwell
Put your trust in those who are worthy.
Putting a computer in front of a child and expecting it to teach him is like putting a book under his pillow, only more expensive. Anon.
Putting off an easy thing makes it hard, and putting off a hard one makes it impossible. George H. Lonmer
Putting on his coroner's cap, Data enjoys a rotten corpse
Pygmies placed on giants' shoulders see more than the giants themselves.
Pyscho 3.0 installed ; run NORMAN.MOM
Pzat!
Q - how can I prove I'm mortal? Worf - DIE!
Q. "Can you use a vacuum cleaner on your dog?"
Q:  Which is worse, ignorance or apathy?
Q: Do you know what the death rate around here is? A:	One per person.
Q: How do you spell 'onomatopoeia'? A: The way it sounds. Anonymous
Q: How many DEC repairman does it take to fix a flat? A: Five; four to hold the car up and one to swap tires. Q: How long does it take? A: It's indeterminate.  It will depend upon how many flats they've brought with them.
Q: How many IBM CPU's does it take to execute a job? A: Four; three to hold it down, and one to rip its head off.
Q: How many IBM cpu's does it take to do a logical right shift? A: 33.  1 to hold the bits and 32 to push the register.
Q: How many IBM types does it take to change a light bulb? A: 100. Ten to do it, and 90 to write document number GC7500439-0001, Multitasking Incandescent Source System Facility, of which 10% of the pages state only "This page intentionally left blank", and 20% of the definitions are of the form "A ...... consists of sequences of non-blank characters separated by blanks".
Q: How many Martians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One and a half.
Q: How many Oregonians does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Three.  One to screw in the lightbulb and two to fend off all those Californians trying to share the experience.
Q: How many existentialists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two.  One to screw it in and one to observe how the lightbulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
Q: How many heterosexual males does it take to screw in a light bulb in San Francisco? A: Both of them.
Q: How many journalists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Three.  One to report it as an inspired government program to bring light to the people, one to report it as a diabolical government plot to deprive the poor of darkness, and one to win a pulitzer prize for reporting that Electric Company hired a lightbulb-assassin to break the bulb in the first place.
Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: FISH
Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Two.  One to hold the girrafe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools.
Q: What do you get when you cross an ethernet with an income statement? A: A local area networth. Anonymous
Q: Why did the tachyon cross the road? A: Because it was on the other side.
Q: Why do ducks have flat feet? A:	To stamp out forest fires.
Q: Why do elephants have flat feet? A:	To stamp out flaming ducks.
Q: Why do mountain climbers rope themselves together? A:	To prevent the sensible ones from going home.
Q:What do I have to do to convince you people?  Worf:Die.
QUOTATION, n. The act of repeating erroneously the words of another. The words erroneously repeated. Ambrose Bierce
Qagh -- it's not just for breakfast anymore
Qmodem: what every aging woman named Carol needs! []
Quack
Quack!
Quality Control, n.: The process of testing one out of every 1,000 units coming off a production line to make sure that at least one out of 100 works.
Quando il gioco si fa duro, i duri cominciano a giocare.
Quantised Revision of Murphy's Law: Everything goes wrong all at once.
Quantity is no substitute for quality, but its the only one we've got.
Quantum particles: The dreams that stuff is made of. Anonymous
Quark Quark Beware the quantum duck
Queen Elizabeth rules, UK?
Question Authority, ask me anything
Question authority before they question you!
Question authority, but raise your hand first.
Question: Man Invented Alcohol, God Invented Grass. Who do you trust?
Questions, questions ! Does it ever end ?
Quick  Act as if nothing has happened
Quick C. Programmer's quick sand.
Quick Close your mind Something might get in.
Quick and Dirty Program is only half right.
Quick, Natasha!  Shoot Moose!
Quick, call a Witch Doctor.  My witch is sick!
Quiet is what home would be without children. Anonymous
Quiet minds cannot be perplexed or frightened but go on in fortune or misfortune at their own private pace, like a clock during a thunderstorm. Robert Louis Stevenson
Quit looking at fortunes and get back to work
Quit looking at fortunes and get back to work!
Quit work and play for once
Quit work and play for once!
Quoth the Raven, "Eat My Shorts."
Quoth the Raven, 'Nevermore.'
R. Crusoe - only one who got everything done by Friday!
R. Smith: Chevrolet, Heartbreak of America.
R.E.M.  Out Of Time
R:Base 3.1 : debased R:Base.
RADIOACTIVE : if you can read this you're sterile.
RAID Antivirus - Kills Virus's DEAD!!!
RAM = Rarely Adequate Memory
RAM disk is *not* an installation procedure.
RAY'S PRECISION RULE: Measure with a micrometer - Mark with chalk - Cut with an axe.
RBBS?
REAL Programmers Don't Write Games.
REAL Programmers start with COPY CON PROGRAM.ARJ.
REAL programmers use undocumented DOS calls
REAL programmers write self-modifying code.
REALITY.DAT not found. Press any key to reset Universe.
REALITY.SYS Corrupted - Unable To Recover Universe
REALITY.SYS corrupted- reboot Universe (Y/N)?
REALITY.SYS corrupted: Reboot universe? (Y/N/Q)
RECOVER.COM: a little slice of hell
RESPONSIBILITY, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one's neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star. Ambrose Bierce
RESTORE A: C:\VIRGINITY\*.* /S
REV. CHICHESTER'S LAW: If the weather is extremely bad or extremely good, attendance will be down.
REYNOLD'S LAW OF CLIMATOLOGY: Wind velocity increases directly with the cost of the hairdo.
RIME : Ridiculous Idiots Mouthing Everywhere.
RIP... This tagline had now been ripped off.....
ROBOCOMM IT!!!!
ROBONAP: Sleeps *for* you while you're online.
ROCK 'N' ROLL, monotony tinged with hysteria. Vance Packard
ROCKEFELLER'S PRINCIPLE: Never do anything you wouldn't be caught dead doing.
ROGER'S LAW: As soon as the stewardess serves the coffee, the airliner encounters turbulence.
ROM instruction: (R)ead (O)perators (M)ind.
ROM wasn't built in a day.
ROMEO: Courage, man; the hurt cannot be much. MERCUTIO: No, 'tis not so deep as a well, nor so wide as a church- door; but 'tis enough, 'twill serve.
ROMINGER'S RULE FOR STUDENTS: The more general the title of a course, the less you learn from it.
RON'S OBSERVATION FOR TEENS: The pimples don't appear until the hour before the date.
RPI cheer:e^^x du/dx,e^^x dx;sec,cos,tan,sin,3.14159...
RTFM
RULE OF DEFACTUALIZATION: Information deteriorates upward through bureaucracies.
RUNE'S RULE: If you don't care where you are, you ain't lost.
RUSSIA: Glasnost experiment site
Race Car spelled backwards is Race Car!!!
Racial prejudice is a pigment of the imagination.
Radical: Anyone whose opinion differs from ours.
Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast, the disk jockey is not allowed to talk. Fran Lebowitz
Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives.
Radioactive halibut will make fission chips.
Rain Rain Go away! Come Again Some Other Day!
Rainforest: a scarcity of animals a plethora of tourists.
Rainy days and Mondays always get me down.
Rainy days and automatic weapons get me down
Rainy days and automatic weapons get me down.
Rainy days and automatic weapons get me down....
Raise ducks for a quack profit.
Raise ducks for quack profit.
Raising Kids Is Like Trying To Heard Cats.
Raising Microsoft bashing to an art form!
Raising pet electric eels is gaining a lot of current popularity.
Raising your voice does not reinforce your argument.
Ramble on.....
Rampaging anarchist horde and floating beer party
Random (Def.): We don't UNDERSTAND the pattern!
Random order is an oxymoron.
Rank and riches are chains of gold, but still chains. Giovanni Ruffini
Rank has its privileges.
Rap MUSIC is an oxymoron....
Rap is poetry set to music. But to me it's like a jackhammer. Bette Midler
Rap is to music as Etch-A-Sketch is to art.
Rap music is Oxymoron
Rapidity does not always mean progress, and hurry is akin to waste. The old fable of the hare and the tortoise is just as good now, and just as true, as when it was first written. Charles A. Stoddard
Rapine, avarice, expense, This is idolatry; and these we adore; Plain living and high thinking are no more. William Wordsworth
Rather go to bed supperless than rise in debt. Benjamin Franklin
Rather suffer an injustice than commit one. Anonymous
Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth. Henry David Thoreau
Razors pain you; Rivers are damp; Acids stain you; And drugs cause cramp. Guns aren't lawful; Nooses give; Gas smells awful; You might as well live. | Dorothy Parker
Re graphics: A picture is worth 10K words -- but only those to describe the picture.  Hardly any sets of 10K words can be adequately described with pictures.
Reach out, reach out and flame someone!
Read me
Read my lips. No new taxes! George Bush
Read my lips...  No more cows, man.
Read my lips...| George Bush
Read the best books first, or you may not have a chance to read them all. Henry David Thoreau
Read the docs. Wow, what a radical concept
Read the docs. Wow, what a radical concept!
Read the dox?!!? Yea, rite...
Read the manual ? Doesn't it come in automatic ?
Read what I mean, not what I write.
Read your Amdahl Business Practices.
Reader not found..., please notify tagline.
Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself. Mark Twain
Reading is a basic tool in the living of a good life. Mortimer J. Adler
Reading is like permitting a man to talk a long time, and refusing you the right to answer. Ed Howe
Reading is thinking with someone else's head instead of one's own.
Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body. Joseph Addison
Reading science fiction can save you from MindLock.
Reading the small print is education; not reading it is experience.
Ready money works great cures. French Proverb
Real Gas - gases that are not imaginary.
Real Programmers aren't afraid to use GOTO's.
Real Programmers don't play tennis, or any other sport that requires you to change clothes.  Mountain climbing is OK, and real programmers wear their climbing boots to work in case a mountain should suddenly spring up in the middle of the machine room.
Real Programmers don't write in PL/I.  PL/I is for programmers who can't decide whether to write in COBOL or FORTRAN.
Real Programmers make lousy managers.
Real Programmers think better when playing Adventure or Rogue.
Real Programmers use DEBUG C:\DOSFILES\PROGRAM.EXE
Real Programs don't use shared text.  Otherwise, how can they use functions for scratch space after they are finished calling them?
Real Time, adj.: Here and now, as opposed to fake time, which only occurs there and then.
Real Trekkers work out at the He's Dead Gym.
Real computer users do it on the command line.
Real firmness is good for anything; strut is good for nothing. Alexander Hamilton
Real glory springs from the silent conquest of ourselves. Joseph P. Thompson
Real hackers' method : COPY CON: PROGRAM.EXE
Real joy comes from doing something worthwhile.
Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance.
Real knowledge is to know the extent of your ignorance.
Real love stories never have endings.
Real men don't set for stun.
Real men write self-modifying code.
Real power comes out of wall outlets.
Real programmers innovate, others LITIGATE !
Real programmers use: COPY CON PROGRAM.EXE
Reality Is An Illusion Caused By Lack Of Acid
Reality does not exist - yet.
Reality failure. Press [Enter] to continuum.
Reality failure. Press [Return] to continuum.
Reality failure. Press enter to continuum.
Reality has become "Bob."  The possibilities are endless.
Reality is a cop-out for people who can't handle drugs.
Reality is a crutch for people who can't face drugs.
Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle buttons
Reality is an illusion produced by alcohol deficiency.
Reality is an obstacle to hallucination.
Reality is blinking again...call for repairs.
Reality is for people who can't deal with drugs.
Reality is for people who can't face drugs.
Reality is for people who can't face science fiction.
Reality is for people who can't handle Star Trek.
Reality is for people who can't handle computers.
Reality is for people who can't handle drugs.
Reality is for people with no grasp of fantasy.
Reality is for those who can't face Science Fiction.
Reality is just a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
Reality is just a crutch for people who can't handle science fiction.
Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.
Reality is something that occupies time between dreams.
Reality is something you rise above. Liza Minnelli
Reality slap number 999999 coming up
Reality--what a concept
Reality--what a concept!
Reality-ometer:  [\........]  Hmmph!  Thought so...
Reality...What a concept!
Reality.Sys corrupted -- Reboot Universe (Y/N)?
Reality: Only a concept and the home of the brave.
Reality: a crutch for those that don't daydream !
Reality: a fantasy gone wrong, dreadfully wrong!!!
Really ??  What a coincidence, I'm shallow too!!
Really. And do these lions eat ants?
Really?? We're having monkey heads?
Reason can in general do more than blind force. Gallus
Reason has never failed men. Only force and repression have made the wrecks in the world. William Allen White
Reason is the wise man's guide, example the fool's. Welsh Proverb
Reasonable people adapt themselves to the world. Unreasonable people attempt to adapt the world to themselves. All progress, therefore, depends on unreasonable people. George Bernard Shaw, english playwrite
Reasoning, Circular : See Circular Reasoning.
Rebel without a clue...
Rebellion It doesn't take a majority to make a rebellion; it takes only a few determined leaders and a sound cause. H. L. Mencken
Rebellion against tyrants is obedience to God. Benjamin Franklin
Rebellion lay in his way, and he found it.
Receiving a million dollars tax free will make you feel better than being flat broke and having a stomach ache. | Dolph Sharp, "I'm O.K., You're Not So Hot"
Recent investments will yield a slight profit.
Recent studies show that recent studies are meaningless.
Recession is when your neighbor loses his job.	Depression is when you lose your job.	These economic downturns are very difficult to predict, but sophisticated econometric modeling houses like Data Resources and Chase Econometrics have successfully predicted 14 of the last 3 recessions.
Reclaimer, spare that tree Take not a single bit It used to point to me, Now I'm protecting it. It was the reader's CONS That made it, paired by dot; Now, GC, for the nonce, Thou shalt reclaim it not.
Recollection is the only paradise from which we cannot be turned out. Jean Paul Richter
Recovering Taglinestealaholic.  Please do not tempt.
Recursive, adj. : see Recursive.
Recursive, adj.; see recursive
Recycle ! Today's Garbage is tomorrow's America !
Recycle...It saves money and the world.
Red ship crashes into blue ship - sailors marooned.
Reduce CO2 Emissions - Stop Breathing!
Reduce Carbon Dioxide emmissions - STOP Breathing
Reduce brain fat.  Eat Moral Fiber.
Redundancy: A Politician with an airbag in his car.
Reflect on your present blessings, of which every man has many, not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some. Charles Dickens
Reform The hole and the patch should be commensurate. Thomas Jefferson
Reform must come from within, not from without. You cannot legislate for virtue. James Cardinal Gibbons
Reformat Hard Drive : are you sure (Y/y) ?
Refuse Novocain...Transcend Dental Medication!
Regal Lager, It's not just a beer... It's a palendrome!
Regard it as just as desirable to build a chicken house as to build a cathedral. The size of the project means little in art, beyond the money matter. It is the quality of the character that really counts. Frank Loyd Wright
Regardless of what you may think, this is NOT a tagline.
Regardless of what you think, I am *THE* man!
Regards, Doug
Regret for time wasted can become a power for good in the time that remains, if we will only stop the waste and the idle, useless regretting. Arthur Brisbane
Regret is an appalling waste of energy; you can't build on it; it's only good for wallowing in. Katherine Mansfield
Rehumanize yourself
Rehumanize yourself!
Reincarnation means you never get away with anything.
Relativism stinks- you can't call anyone a moron
Relay THIS, fella!
Religion ... is the opium of the masses.
Religion has not civilized man, man has civilized religion. Robert Green Ingersoll
Religion is a candle inside a multicolored lantern. Everyone looks through a particular color, but the candle is always there. Mohammed Neguib
Religion is the sole technique for the validating of values. Allen Tate
Religion is the sum of the expansive impulses of a being. Henry H. Ellis
Religions are the great fairy tales of conscience. George Santayana
Religions revolve madly around sexual questions.
Religious error: (A)tone, (R)epent, (I)mmolate?
Remarriage after divorce is the triumph of hope over experience.
Remeber when safe sex meant not getting caught?
Remember - A smile will always increase your face value.
Remember : to a computer 1 + 1 = 10.
Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear the phone is for you. Fran Leibowitz
Remember that credit is money. Benjamin Franklin
Remember that happiness is a way of travel, not a destination. Roy Goodman
Remember that life is not measured in hours but in accomplishments. James A. Pike
Remember that nobody will ever get ahead of you as long as he is kicking you in the seat of the pants. Walter Winchell
Remember that there is nothing stable in human affairs; therefore avoid undue elation in prosperity, or undue depression in adversity. Socrates
Remember that whatever misfortune may be your lot, it could only be worse in Cleveland. | National Lampoon, "Deteriorada"
Remember that you are unique.  Just like everyone else.
Remember the Alamo.
Remember to say hello to your bank teller.
Remember who has control of the DEL key!
Remember, Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did, but she did it backwards and in high heels. Faith Whittlesey
Remember, Murphy is out there... waiting.
Remember, UNIX spelled backwards is XINU.
Remember, Unix on some machines is nUxi.
Remember, democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet that did not commit suicide. John Quincy Adams
Remember, even if you win the rat race - you're still a rat.
Remember, even if you win the rat race -- you're still a rat.
Remember, even if you win the rat race; you're still a rat.
Remember, the end never justifies the meanness.
Remember, the paper is always strongest at the perforations.
Remember, to a computer 1 + 1 = 10.
Remember, unlike sex, there's no such thing as a bad rant.
Remember................. Wherever you go, there you are.
Remember:  'i' before 'e', except in Budweiser
Remember: COBOL can be cured if detected early.
Remember: It is 10 times harder to command the ear than to catch the eye. Duncan Maxwell Anderson
Remember: even if you win the rat race, you will still be a rat.
Remembering is for those who have forgotten.
Remorse is regret that one waited so long to do it. H. L. Mencken
Remorse is the echo of a lost virtue. Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton
Remorse is the pain of sin. Theodore Parker
Remorse is virtue's root; its fair increase are fruits of innocence and blessedness. William Cullen Bryant
Remorse: beholding heaven and feeling hell. George Moore
Remote Login - a login that is unlikely to succeed.
Remove tongue from cheek before chewing.
Renegade Tagline ! We're tired of Being Kidnapped !
Repartee: an insult with a suit and tie on.
Repentance is another name for aspiration. Henry Ward Beecher
Replace repetitive expressions by calls to a common function.
Reply not necessary; just send money.
Reporter (to Mahatma Gandhi): Mr Gandhi, what do you think of Western Civilization? Gandhi: I think it would be a good idea.
Reporter, n.: A writer who guesses his way to the truth and dispels it with a tempest of words. | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child. | Dan Quayle
Reputation : what others are not thinking about you.
Reputation is what others are not thinking about you.
Reputation:  what others are not thinking about you.
Research is an organized method for keeping you reasonably dissatisfied with what you have. Charles Kettering
Research is to see what everyone else has, and then think what no one else has.
Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing.| Wernher von Braun
Research serves to make building stones out of stumbling blocks. Arthur D. Little
Research: noun - plural form of plagiarism.
Reserve the apostrophe for it's proper use and omit it when its not needed.
Resignation is putting God between ourselves and our troubles. Anne Sophie Swetchine
Resignation is the courage of Christian sorrow. Alexandre Vinet
Resist everything but temptation.
Resist the devil and he will flee from you
Resistance Is Useless!   (If < 1 ohm)
Resistance is useless... if smaller than 1 ohm.
Resistance to tyrants is obedience to God. Thomas Jefferson
Resisting temptation is easier when you think you'll probably get another chance later on.
Resolve and thou art free. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Resolve to be thyself: and know, that he Who finds himself, loses his misery. Matthew Arnold
Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve. Benjamin Franklin
Resort is had to ridicule only when reason is against us. Thomas Jefferson
Resort: A place where the tired grow more tired.
Respect One of the surprising things in this world is the respect a worthless man has for himself. Ed Howe
Respect must be earned, not commanded.
Responsibilities gravitate to the person who can shoulder them. Elbert Hubbard
Responsibility educates. Wendell Phillips
Responsibility is the price of greatness. Winston Churchill
Responsibility is the thing people dread most of all. Yet it is the one thing in the world that develops us, gives us manhood or womanhood fibre. Frank Crane
Rest assured that your dog is finally getting enough cheese.
Rest is a good thing, but boredom is its brother. Voltaire
Rest: the sweet sauce of labor. Plutarch
Restaurant: An eating place that does not sell drugs.
Restlessness and discontent are the necessities of progress. Thomas A. Edison
Results! Why man, I have gotten a lot of results. I know several thousand things that won't work. Thomas Alva Edison, amedican inventor and industrialist
Results! Why, man, I have gotten a lot of results. I know several thousand things that won't work. Thomas A. Edison
Retirement A man is known by the company that keeps him on after retirement age. Anonymous
Retirement should be based on the tread, not the mileage.
Retribution often means that we eventually do to ourselves what we have done unto others. Eric Hoffer
Retribution will be yours.
Return((usBirdInHand = 2 * InTheBush()));
Reuseable Condoms: Just shake the fuck out of them.
Revenge is a dish best eaten cold.
Revenge is an act of passion; vengeance of justice. Injuries are revenged; crimes are avenged. Joseph Joubert
Revenge is sweet but profit is sweeter.
Revenge is the abject pleasure of an abject mind. Juvenal
Reverie is when ideas float in our mind without reflection or regard of the understanding. John Locke
Reverse the polarity of the neutron flow.
Revolution Revolutions are not trifles, but spring from trifles. Aristotle
Revolution is the opiate of the intellectuals.
Revolution: in politics, an abrupt change in the form of misgovernment. Ambrose Bierce
Revolutionary movements attract those who are not good enough for established institutions as well as those who are too good for them. George Bernard Shaw
Revolutions are not made by men in spectacles. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Revolutions have never lightened the burden of tyranny: they have only shifted it to another shoulder. George Bernard Shaw
Rewards and punishments are the lowest form of education., Chuang-Tzu
Rhode Island, the ocean state.
Rhode Island, the smallest state in the USA
Richard Nixon means never having to say you're sorry
Riches cover a multitude of woes.
Rick for President!
Rid yourself of doubt, or should you...
Ridicule is the first and last argument of fools. Charles Simmons
Ridicule is the language of the devil. Thomas Carlyle
Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before. Stephen Wright
Right reason is stronger than force. James A. Garfield
Riker to Enterprise.  Beam down Troi and a six-pack.
Riker's trombone backfires, creating a new universe.
Riker's trombone backfires, creating a tagline.
Riker, AKA "Number One." A spy for the Borg?
Risk is a part of God's game, alike for men and nations. George E. Woodberry
Risk! Risk Anything! Care no more for the opinion of others, for those other voices. Do the hardest thing on earth for you. Act for yourself. Face the truth. Katherine Mansfield
Rivalry is the life of trade, and the death of the trader. Elbert Hubbard
Rl prgrmmrs dnt nd vwls.
RoBo in the hands of Dumbo cd. be ho,ho,ho!!
Road-Kill Sold Here! Eat in or take out!
Rob Banks.. That's where the money is.
Robinson Crusoe - the only one who got everything done by Friday !
Robo is not a COP !
Rocks: The original unfinished furniture!
Roll up your sleeves...And you won't lose your shirt.
Rome was not built in one day.
Rome was not built in one day.| John Heywood (1497-1580)
Rome wasn't built in a day Proverb
Romulan DOS: Cloaked command or file name
Ronald Regan: Milli Vanilli of presidents.
Room to Let. Apply within.
Roses are red, Violet's are blue, And mine are white.
Roses are red, and violets are too expensive for you.
Rotisserie: a ferris wheel for chickens
Rotten wood cannot be carved - Confucius (Analects, Book 5, Ch. 9)
Round numbers are always false.
Round up the usual suspects!
Round, round, get around. I've gotten round!
Royalty consists not in vain pomp, but in great virtues. Agesilaus II
Rubber bands have snappy endings
Rubber bands have snappy endings!
Rudin's Law: If there is a wrong way to do something, most people will do it every time.
Rugby is a beastly game played by gentlemen; soccer is a gentleman's game played by beasts; football is a beastly game played by beasts. Henry Blaha
Rugby is played by men with odd-shaped balls!
Rule #167: niether a borrower nor a lender be.
Rule of Creative Research: 1) Never draw what you can copy. 2) Never copy what you can trace. 3) Never trace what you can cut out and paste down.
Rule of Defactualization: Information deteriorates upward through bureaucracies.
Rule of Feline Frustration: When your cat has fallen asleep on your lap and looks utterly content and adorable, you will suddenly have to go to the bathroom.
Rule of the Great: When people you greatly admire appear to be thinking deep thoughts, they probably are thinking about lunch.
Ruling a big country is like cooking a small fish.
Ruling a country is like cooking a small fish. | Lao-tzu
Run away
Run away!
Run for the hills The ducks are loose
Run to daylight. Vince Lombardi
Rural life is lived mostly in the country
Rush Hour is an oxymoron.
Russia has the Moscow Circus; WE have CONGRESS
Russian Express Card motto: Don't leave home!
S met ing's hap ening t  my k ybo rd . .
SADDAM SPELLED BACWARDS IS WHAT HE IS!
SAFESEX.ZIP is a Trojan.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22 - Dec 21) You are optimistic and enthusiastic.  You have a reckless tendency to rely on luck since you lack talent.  The majority of Sagittarians are drunks or dope fiends or both.  People laugh at you a great deal.
SALESMAN'S MOTTO: It is morally wrong to allow a naive person to keep their money.
SANITY.SYS corrupt. MIND lost.
SAPFU -- Surpassing All Pevious Foul Ups
SAPFU : Surpassing All Previous Foul Ups.
SCCS, the source motel  Programs check in and never check out | Ken Thompson
SCNATTERLY'S SUMMING UP OF THE COROLLARIES: If anything can't go wrong, it will.
SCORPIO (Oct 23 - Nov 21) You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted.  You will achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics.  Most Scorpio people are murdered.
SCOTT'S SECOND LAW: When an error has been detected and corrected, it will be found to be correct originally.
SCUD : Sure Could Use Directions
SEAY'S LAW: Nothing ever comes out as planned.
SECOND LAW OF COMPUTER PROGRAMMING: Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable.
SEGA and Nintendo are combining, they call it Windows NT
SEIT'S LAW OF HIGHER EDUCATION: The one course you need for graduation is not offered your last semester.
SEMPER UBI SUB UBI
SEMPER UBI SUB UBI !!!!
SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . .
SENILE.COM found... Out Of Memory...
SERVICE AND CLAIMS : Midnight to 2 AM.
SET DEVICE=EXXON to screw up your environment.
SEX: The most fun you can have without laughing. Anonymous, from Webster's Unafraid Dictionary
SEYMOUR'S INVESTMENT PRINCIPLE: Never invest in anything that eats.
SHAW'S PRINCIPLE: Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will use it.
SHIFT TO THE LEFT  SHIFT TO THE RIGHT POP UP, PUSH DOWN, BYTE, BYTE, BYTE
SHIN - A device for finding furniture in the dark.
SHIRLEY'S LAW: Most people deserve each other.
SILVERMAN'S PARADOX: If Murphy's Law can go wrong, it will.
SIMON'S LAW: Everything put together falls apart sooner or later.
SKILL: A long, long, long, long streak of blind luck.
SKOFF'S LAW: A child will not spill on a dirty floor.
SLEEP: that fleeting moment just before the alarm.
SLMR : if it weren't so damn good, I'd use something else !
SNAFU (Situation Normal All Fouled Up).
SO WHO NAMED YOU "TASTE POLICE" ANYWAY?
SODD'S SECOND LAW: Sooner or later the worst is bound to occur.
SOFTWARE -- formal evening attire for female computer analysts.
SOFTWARILY adv. In a way pertaining to software. "The system is softwarily unreliable." The adjective 'softwary' is NOT used. See HARDWARILY.
SPARK'S FIRST RULE: Strive to look tremendously important.
SPECIMEN: An Italian astronaut.
SPOUSE, n: Someone who'll stand by you through all the trouble you wouldn't have had if you'd stayed single. Anonymous
STAND BACK I don't know how big this gets
STATISTICL ANALYSIS: Mysterious, sometimes bizarre, manipulations performed upon the collected data of an experiment in order to obscure the fact that the results have no generalizable meaning for humanity. Commonly, computers are used, lending an additional aura of unreality to the proceedings. Anon
STATUS QUO is Latin for "the mess we're in."
STAY ALERTTRUST NO ONEKEEP YOUR LASER HANDY
STEELE'S PHILOSOPHY: Everybody should believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink.
STEINBACH'S GUIDELINE: Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle.
STENDERUP'S LAW: The sooner you fall behind, the more time you will have to catch up.
STEP 12 : having had a spiritual awakening as a result...
STICK \'stik\ n. 1: A boomerang than doesn't work.
STICK \'stik\ n. 1: A boomerang that doesn't work.
STICK: A boomerang that doesn't work.
STITZER'S VACATION PRINCIPLE: Take half as much clothing & twice as much money.
STRESS--Your gut says no & your mouth says yes
STRING space corrupt?  But I always use TAPE
STRING space corrupt?  But I always use TAPE!
STUDENT'S LAW: Every instructor assumes you have nothing to do but study for his course.
STUPIDITY is NOT a HANDICAP  Park elsewhere
STUPIDITY is NOT a HANDICAP!  Park elsewhere!
SUSHIDO   the way of the tuna
SWEATER, n: Garment worn by child when it's mother is feeling chilly. Ambrose Bierce
SX=Sexually eXtinct,also known as neutered,ergo an SX
SYNTAX?  Why not--they tax everything else!
SYSOP's read minds.  But QWKly, very, very QWKly!
SYSOP: The guy laughing at your typing.
SYSTEM ERROR:  press F13 to continue...
Sacred cows make great hamburgers.
Saddam Hussein Condoms.  For guys who don't pull out.
Saddam eats his Kurds
Sado-necro-beastiality is beating a dead horse.
Sado-necro-bestiality is flogging a dead horse.
Safety is better than the wrong answer.
Sailors curse the rain that farmers prayed for in vain.
Saint, n. a dead sinner, revised and edited. - Ambrose Bierce
Salary is no object: strive only to keep body and soul apart.
Sally sells C Shells to the C sore.
Salvation is only a Beer Bottle away.......
Sam, Ziggy doesn't appear to know what a Klingon is......
Same to you and whatever you meant by that
Sameness is the mother of disgust, variety the cure. Petrarch
Samson had the right idea about advertising.  He took two columns and brought down the house.
San Francisco isn't what it used to be, and it never was. | Herb Caen
San Francisco, n.: Marcel Proust editing an issue of Penthouse.
Sandwich: An faulty attempt to make both ends meat.
Sane?  Hell, if I was sane why would I be here?
Sanely applied advertising could remake the world. Stuart Chase
Santa's elves are just a bunch of subordinate Clauses.
Santa's helpers are now Subordinate Clauses!
Sarcasm is the language of the devil, for which reason I have long since as good as renounced it. Thomas Carlyle
Sarcasm works better when it's spelled correctly.
Sarcasm: barbed ire.
Satan hasn't a single salaried helper; the Opposition employ a million. Mark Twain
Satan the envious said with a sigh: Christians know more about their hell than I. Alfred Kreymborg
Satire does not look pretty upon a tombstone.
Satire is focused bitterness. Leo Rosten
Satire is what closes in New Haven.
Sattinger's Law:  It works better if you plug it in.
Saturate - the scientific term for sitting on a wet toilet seat.
Savages we call them because their manners differ from ours. Benjamin Franklin
Save The Next Generation -- End Abortion today!
Save a tree. Eat a beaver.
Save a whale, harpoon a fat person.
Save changes before exit?  (Y)es, (N)o, (W)hat changes?!?
Save energy, drive a smaller process.
Save energy: be apathetic.
Save fuel.  Get cremated with a friend.
Save gas, don't eat beans.
Save gas, don't use the shell.
Save on toilet paper...use both sides!
Save our beaches. Harpoon a fat chick.
Save our virgin forests - buy a tree a chastity belt.
Save pennies>> Make your own bullets!
Save the Chocolate Moose!
Save the Whales - Collect the entire set!
Save the wales Nuke Greenpeace instead
Save the whales!  Trade them for valuable prizes!
Save the whales.  Collect the whole set.
Save the whales.  Trade them at church!
Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
Save trees - do everything online
Save trees, eat beavers.
Save your money for a rainy day, or a new computer!
Save yourself Reboot in 5 seconds
Save yourself!	Reboot in 5 seconds!
Saving is a fine thing, especially when your parents have done it for you.
Say goodnight, Dick.
Say it with flowers - Give her a triffid.
Say nothing & they think your stupid..Talk & they know for sure.
Say the secret woid and the duck is yours.
Say the secret word and you win $100.
Say what you will about the ten commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them. H.L. Mencken
Say yer prayers, y' flea-bitten' varmint.
Scandal dies sooner of itself, than we could kill it. Benjamin Rush
Scandal is gossip made tedious by morality.
Scandal is what one half of the world takes pleasure inventing, and the other half in believing. Paul Chatfield
Scandal: gossip made tedious by morality. Oscar Wilde
Scarecrow for centipedes | From "101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR"
Scarred for Life. No compensation. Private Investigation.| Mark Knopfler
Schapiro's Explanation: The grass is always greener on the other side -- but that's because they use more manure.
Schizophrenia beats being alone.
Schizophrenia beats sysoping alone.
Schizophrenia rules.  OK.  OK.
School is where you go between when your parents can't take you and industry can't take you., John Updike
Science Fiction : the cutting edge of reality !
Science asks why.  I ask why not.
Science does not know its debt to imagination. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Science fiction warps your mind. Engage warp factor 10.
Science has to be understood in its broadest sense, as a method for comprehending all observable reality, and not merely as an instrument for acquiring specialized knowledge. Alexis Carrel
Science is nothing but perception. Plato
Science is organized common sense where many a beautiful theory was killed by an ugly fact. Thomas Huxley
Science is simply common sense at its bestthat is, rigidly accurate in observation, and merciless to fallacy in logic. Thomas Huxley
Science is true.  Don't be misled by facts.|
Science is what happens when preconception meets verification.
Science is what you know, philosophy is what you don't know. Bertrand Russell
Science may have found a cure for most evils, but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all, the apathy of human beings. Helen Keller
Science without religion is lame; religion without science is blind. Albert Einstein
Science: preconception meeting verification.
Scientists are planning to blow up the Moon!!!
Scientists discover life causes cancer.
Scoff not at the natural defects of any which are not in their power to amend. It is cruel to beat a cripple with his own crutches! Thomas Fuller
Scott me up Beamie
Scott me up, Beamie
Scott me up, Beamie !
Scott's first Law: No matter what goes wrong, it will probably look right.
Scott's second Law: When an error has been detected and corrected, it will be found to have been wrong in the first place. Corollary: After the correction has been found in error, it will be impossible to fit the original quantity back into the equation.
Scotty - "I know this ship like the back of my hand!"  <BONK>
Scotty Hurry, beam me u....*       NO CARRIER
Scotty is smoking the dilithium crystals again, Jim
Scotty! Hurry! Beam me uragg^* NO CARRIER
Scotty's been smoking the Dilythium crystals again, Jim.
Scotty:	Captain, we din' can reference it Kirk: Analysis, Mr. Spock? Spock: Captain, it doesn't appear in the symbol table. Kirk: Then it's of external origin? Spock:	Affirmative. Kirk: Mr. Sulu, go to pass two. Sulu: Aye aye, sir, going to pass two.
Scotty: Captain, Chekov blew up killing Bones! Spock:Fascinating!
Scotty: What is it?  Data: It is... it is green.
Scratch and Sniff->   Smells like glass, eh?
Scratch my back and I'll scratch yours. American Proverb
Screw the Prime Directive! Send the Borg Windows.
Screw up your courage  You've screwed up everything else.
Script : ImpLode, UpLode, DownLode, ExpLode !
Scripts don't what I tell them to.  :-(
Scrute the inscrutable, eff the ineffable.
Sculptor: A poor unfortunate who makes faces and busts.
Sculpture: mud pies that endure.
Scuze'a
Sdrawkcab spelled backwards is backwards.
Sears has everything.
Season's Greetings should be all year 'round!
Seattle Rain Festival - Jan. 1 to Dec. 31
Second Law of Business Meetings: If there are two possible ways to spell a person's name, you will pick the wrong one. Corollary: If there is only one way to spell a name, you will spell it wrong, anyway.
Second chances aren't usually associated with first impressions.
Second star to the right & straight on till morning...
Second star to the right and straight on till morning.
Second star to the right and straight on till morning...
Second-rate people hire third-rate people.
Secrecy at my job prevents me from knowing what I do.
Secret negotiations are usually neither.
Secrets are things we give to others to keep for us. Elbert Hubbard
Sector Not Found (A)bort, (R)etry, (C)offee?
Sector not found. Kill Program ? (Y)es, (N)o, (S)crew it
Security - the computer programmer's equivalent of a joke.
Security check: INTRUDER ALERT
Security is a game but the final goal is never reached.
Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. Helen Keller
Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. Helen Keller
Security is not the meaning of my life. Great opportunities are worth the risk. Shirley Hufstedler
Security is the individual's responsibility.
Security is the priceless product of freedom. Only the strong can be secure, and only in freedom can men produce those material resources which can secure them from want at home and against aggression from abroad. B. E. Hutchinson
Security is your responsibility.
Security to 10 Forward. Worf's into the margaritas again.
Security, confine Ensign @LN@ to the brig.
Security, get that floozy off my bridge. | Picard
See how you can be?
See other side for reading instructions.
See other side.
See the gypsy queen in a glaze of Vaseline
Seeing a murder on television can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any antagonisms, the commercials will give you some. Alfred Hitchcock
Seeing is believing Proverb
Seeing is believing, Touching is convincing..
Seeing is deceiving. It's eating that's believing.
Seeing that death, a necessary end, will come when it will come.
Seek companionship, love and social activity at home.
Seek domestic happiness and faithful friends.
Seek error reading drive Z:, reboot system!
Seek not the favor of the multitude; it is seldom got by honest and lawful means. But seek the testimony of the few; and number not voices, but weigh them. Immanuel Kant
Seek not to follow footsteps but what they sought.
Seems just like yesterday . . . Hey! It was!
Segregation was wrong when it was forced by white people, and I believe it is still wrong when it is requested by black people. Coretta Scott King
Seize the day, put no trust in the morrow
Seize the day, put no trust in the morrow  | Horace (8 BC)
Seize the day, put no trust in the morrow!
Self Test for Paranoia:	You know you have it when you can't think of anything that's your own fault.
Self help for people who talk too much:  On and On Anon
Self-deceit is easy; what one wishes one believes is true
Self-made man: A horrible example of unskilled labour.
Self-piercing earrings | From "101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR"
Self-sacrifice enables us to sacrifice other people without blushing. George Bernard Shaw
Self-sacrifice is never entirely unselfish, for the giver never fails to receive. Dolores E. McGuire
Self-sacrifice is the real miracle out of which all the reported miracles grow. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Self-sacrifice which denies common sense is not a virtue. It's a spiritual dissipation. Margaret Deland
Self-trust is the essence of heroism. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Selfishness is the greatest curse of the human race. William E. Gladstone
Sell short.
Sell!  Sell Everything, dammit!  Sell!!
Semiconductor:  A part-time orchestra leader.
Seminars, n.: From "semi" and "arse", hence, any half-assed discussion.
Semper fidelis- always faithful.
Send Monopoly Money to your Favorite TV Evangelist
Send a self-abused stomped elephant to...
Send lawyers, guns, & money...
Send lawyers, guns, and money
Send more tourists--the last ones were delicious!
Send more tourists..... the last ones were delicious
Senilgat gnidaer emit hcum oot dneps uoY
Sensors identify the creatures as "scrubbing bubbles."
Sensual pleasures are like soap bubbles, sparkling, effervescent. The pleasures of intellect are calm, beautiful, sublime, ever enduring and climbing upward to the borders of the unseen world. John H. Aughey
Sentences are essential elements for writers.
Sentient plasmoids are a gas.
Sentiment is intellectualized emotion; emotion precipitated, as it were, in pretty crystals by the fancy. James Russell Lowell
Sentiment is the poetry of the imagination. Alphonse de Lamartine
Sentimentality is the only sentiment that rubs you the wrong way. W. Somerset Maugham
Sentimentalitythat's what we call the sentiment we don't share. Graham Greene
Serfs up |Spartacus.
Serfs up! - Spartacus
Serial killer - Mouse & modem found dead.
Seriousness is the very next step to being dull.
Sermons are like pie-crust, the shorter the better. Austin O'Malley
Serocki's Stricture: Marriage is always a bachelor's last option.
Serving coffee on aircraft causes turbulence.
Serving the scum of Paris for over 300 years
Set a thief to catch a thief. Anonymous
Set a thief to catch a thief. French Proverb
Set mode=Extremely verbose
Set phasers on tickle
Set phasers to extreme itching
Set the cart before the horse.
Set your Phasers on *Pur^[^\e*
Severe mental error ... Low Level Brain Format recommended!
Sex The most fun you can have with your clothes off.
Sex The most fun you can have with your clothes on.
Sex causes cancer.  We'd wipe out cancer in one generation if no one had sex.
Sex discriminates against the shy and ugly.
Sex is a disrobic experience
Sex is a misdemeanor -- The more you miss de meaner you get.
Sex is nobody's business except the three people involved
Sex is not the answer.	Sex is the question.  "Yes" is the answer.
Sex is not the answer.  Sex is the question.  "Yes" is the answer. | Swami X
Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question.  "Yes" is the answer.
Sex is nothing but Love misunderstood.
Sex is only a pain in the arse if you miss
Sex is the mathematics urge sublimated. | M. C. Reed.
Sex is the most fun you can have without laughing.
Sex on TV can't hurt you unless you fall off!
Sex on TV can't hurt you...unless you fall off.
Sex prejudice is so ingrained in our society that many who practice it are simply unaware that they are hurting. It is the last socially acceptable prejudice. Bernice Sandler
Sex without love is an empty experience, but, as empty experiences go, it's one of the best. | Woody Allen
Sex, Sex, Sex... the pleasure of having a 1 track mind.
Sex: the most fun you can have without laughing.
Sexual Harrasment starts at the office.
Sexy: Uses feather.  Kinky: Uses entire chicken.
Shake off your heavy trance! And leap into a dance.
Shake, a man of note, wrote so many things to quote.
Shall I sing you the Ode to Joy?
Shallow men believe in luck. Strong men believe in cause and effect. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Shame is an ornament to the young, a disgrace to the old.
Share and enjoy, share and enjoy!
Share your happiness with others today.
Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow. Sweedish Proverb
Shareware author dies:  .GIF at eleven!
Sharewear (n.) -- Used clothing.
Sharper than an asp's tooth to have a thankless child.
Shave daily with Occam's razor.
Shaw's Principle: Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will want to use it.
Shchizophrenia beats being alone.
Shchizphrenia beats being alone.
She canna take anneh more, Cap'n
She criticized my apartment, so I knocked her flat.
She devotes her spare time to neglecting duties.
She has been under more drunken sailors than a head.
She is blonde/tall/beautiful, and as a Z80 for a brain
She is but half a wife that is not, nor is capable of being, a friend. William Penn
She is not made to be the admiration of all, but the happiness of one. Edmund Burke
She is not refined.  She is not unrefined.  She keeps a parrot. | Mark Twain
She just, turns around and disappear. I kinda like that style.
She knows as well as anyone that pity, having played, soon tires. Edwin Arlington Robinson
She laments,...her husband goes this morning a-birding.
She looks so good, she makes a dead man come.| Tom Waits
She loves you as much as she can, which is not very much.
She may very well pass for forty-three in the dusk with a light behind her.
She missed an invaluable opportunity to give him a look that you could have poured on a waffle ...
She offered her honour, he honoured her offer - all night long, honour and offer
She sells C shells
She sells cshs by the cshore.
She that paints her face thinks of her tail. -- Poor Richard.
She was another one of his near Mrs.
She was only the stableman's daughter, but all the horsemen knew her.
She was so narrow-minded she could see through a keyhole with two eyes.
She was the sort of person whose personality would be greatly improved by a terminal illness.
She was using the landscape to hide herself
She who hesitates is won.
She won't last forever, so why give her a diamond?
She won't last forever.  Why give her a diamond?
She won't last forever; why give her a diamond?
She's ALIVE, Jim  Pass the Trojans
She's a good Sheila, Bruce, and not at all stuck up.
She's genuinely bogus.
She's learned to say things with her eyes that others waste time putting into words.
Sheep are best
Sheep are best!
Sheesh ! You start havin' fun, and they send the lawyers !
Shell to DOS... come in DOS... Do you copy?
Shell to DOS....Come in, DOS.....Do you Copy?
Shell to DOS....come in DOS.
Shell to DOS...Come in Dos, do you copy? Shell to DOS...
Shh Be vewy quiet, I'm hunting wuntime errors
Shh I have to use my incomplete, divided attention here
Shh! Be vewy quiet. I'm hunting Womulans!!
Shh! Be vewy vewy quiet! I'm hunting wuntime ewwors!
Shh...Be vewy quiet!  I'm hunting tagwines!
Shhh... Be very quiet ! I'm hunting runtime errors !
Shhhh! Hardware is Supposed to Be Secret!
Shift to the left  Shift to the right  Pop up, push down  Byte, byte, byte
Shift to the left!  Shift to the right!  Pop up, push down!  Byte, byte, byte!
Shin - Device for finding furniture in the dark.
Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark.
Shine on, you crazy diamond
Shine on, you crazy diamond!
Shoes for Industry. Shoes for the dead.
Shoot your program and put it out of its memory
Shoplifters with the runs take Clepto Bismol
Shopping Tip: Shoes are only 85 at the bowling alley.
Short as life is, we make it still shorter by the careless waste of time. Victor Hugo
Short circuits got no reason to live.
Short cut ... The longest distance between two points.
Short men who dance with tall women get bust in the eye.
Short people are vertically challenged.
Shortcut : taking a quicker route to stand in a bank line !
Should I or shouldn't I?... Too late, I did!
Should I weed the lawn or say it's a garden?
Should be read umop apisdn for best results.
Shouldn't you be doing something productive?
Show Girl : she's more show than girl.
Show me a genuine case of platonic friendship, and I shall show you two old or homely faces. Austin O'Malley
Show me a man who is a good loser and I'll show you a man who is playing golf with his boss.
Show me a sane man.  I'll cure him for you.
Show me a thoroughly satisfied man and I will show you a failure. Thomas A. Edison
Show respect for age.  Drink good Scotch for a change.
Show your affection, which will probably meet with pleasant response.
Show your appreciation for your lover with a surprise small gift.
Shower the people you love with your love.
Shower with the people you love.
Shredded cabbage goes great with shredded carrots and mayonnaise. Cole's Law
Shut up, Spock  We're rescuing you  | McCoy
Shut up, kid.  | Guinan
Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor.
Sight is a faculty; seeing is an art.
Sigmund's wife wore freudian slips.
Sign here please:_______________________Thanks
Sign here: X______________________________.
Sign on Closed Nuclear Power Plant... "Gone Fission"
Sign on a clothing store - Come inside and have a fit.
Sign on bank:  "FREE BOTTLE OF CHIVAS WITH EVERY MILLION-DOLLAR DEPOSIT."
Sign up now for the summarizing Proust competition
Sign up now for the summarizing Proust competition!
Signito ergo sum - I sign therefore I am.
Signs of crime: screaming or cries for help. | from the Brown Security Crime Prevention Pamphlet
Silence cannot be misquoted.
Silence is foolish if we are wise, but wise if we are foolish. Charles Caleb Colton
Silence is golden Proverb
Silence is less injurious than a bad reply.
Silence is more eloquent at times than words.
Silence is not only golden; it's seldom misquoted.
Silence is one great art of conversation. William Hazlitt
Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute. Josh Billings
Silence is the ultimate weapon of power. Charles De Gaulle
Silent gratitude isn't much use to anyone. Gladys Browyn Stern
Silk was invented so that women could go naked in clothes.
Silly Wabbit, QWKs are for kids
Silly question
Silly rabbit, tricks are for hookers!
Silly wabbit, QWKs are for kids.
Silly wabbit......QWKs are for QWKidds.
Silver and gold make even pigs seem clean.
Silver in color, very heavy - He's lead, Jim!
Silverman's Law: If Murphy's Law can go wrong, it will.
Silvester Stallone: father of the RISC concept.
Simon says: don't be so suggestible.
Simon's Law: Everything put together falls apart sooner or later.
Simple people ... are very quick to see the live facts which are going on about them. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Simple pleasures are the last refuge of the complex.
Simple rule: If you don't treat me right, shame on you.
Simple... Just do this... <universe ends>  Wesley
Simplicity and clarity should be your theme in dress.
Simply the thing I am shall make me live. William Shakespeare
Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle that fits them all. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle which fits them all.
Sin is not harmful because it is forbidden, but it is forbidden because it is hurtful. Benjamin Franklin
Since I hurt my pendulum My life is all erratic. My parrot, who was cordial, Is now transmitting static. The carpet died, a palm collapsed, The cat keeps doing poo. The only thing that keeps me sane Is talking to my shoe. | My Shoe
Since Time is not a person we can overtake when he is gone, let us honor him with mirth and cheerfulness of heart while he is passing. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Since aerosols are forbidden, the police are using roll-on Mace
Since aerosols are forbidden, the police are using roll-on Mace!
Since life goes on - you might as well get on with it.
Since the house is on fire let us warm ourselves. Italian Proverb
Since we cannot get what we like, let us like what we can get. Spanish Proverb
Since we're all here, we must not be all there. | Bob "Mountain" Beck
Since you put it that way...
Sincerity is the Way.  |Mencius, 372-289 B.C.
Singularity in the right hath ruined many; happy those who are convinced of the general opinion. Benjamin Franklin
Sir Romulan warbird decloaki;.uw|A NO CARRIER
Sir! Romulan Warbird decloaking2O:b NO CARRIER
Sir, I've been meaning to dicuss these feelings. | Troi
Sir, it's very possible this asteroid is not stable.
Sir, the USS Tagline has warp capability and is 70 characters in size!
Sirens: What you hear in a Japanese library.
Sit down before fact as a little child, be prepared to give up every preconceived notion, follow humbly wherever and to whatever abysses nature leads, or you shall learn nothing. Thomas Huxley
Sit down before fact as a little child, be prepared to give up every preconceived notion, follow humbly wherever and whatever abysses nature leads, or you will learn nothing. Thomas H. Huxley
Sit down before fact as a little child, be prepared to give up every preconceived notion, follow humbly wherever or whatever abysses nature leads, or you will learn nothing. Thomas H. Huxley
Sit down, you're rocking the boat!
Sit in reverie and watch the changing color of the waves that break upon the idle seashore of the mind. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Six megs, two monitors, and an attitude
Six of one, 110 (base 2) of another.
Skating away on the thin ice of a new day.
Skepticism is slow suicide. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Skepticism is the chastity of the intellect. George Santayana
Skepticism, riddling the faith of yesterday, prepared the way for the faith of tomorrow. Romain Rolland
Skepticism: the mark and even the pose of the educated mind. John Dewey
Skeptics are never deceived. French Proverb
Skill to do comes of doing. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Skill without imagination is craftsmanship and gives us many useful objects such as wickerwork and picnic baskets. Imagination without skill gives us modern art. Tom Stoppard
Skinner's Constant (or Flannagan's Finagling Factor): That quantity which, when multiplied by, divided by, added to, or subtracted from the answer you get, gives you the answer you should have gotten.
Skydiving: Good to the last drop.
Slack!
Slander is the revenge of a coward, and dissimulation of his defense. Samuel Johnson
Slanders are like flies, that pass all over a man's good parts to light on his sores. Anon.
Slang is language that takes off its coat, spits on its hands, and goes to work
Slang is language that takes off its coat, spits on its hands, and goes to work.
Slavery's not just a job, it's indenture.
Sleazegate and Disk Mangler, what a pair !
Sleep faster.  We need the pillows.  Yiddish Proverb
Sleep faster. We need the pillows.
Sleep is an inadequate substitute for caffeine.
Sleep is the twin of death. Homer
Sleep lingers all our lifetime about our eyes, as night hovers all day in the boughs of the fir-tree. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Sleep she as sound as careless infancy. William Shakespeare
Sleep, Silence's child, sweet father of soft rest, Prince whose approach peace to all mortals brings Indifferent host to shepherds and kings, Sole comforter to minds with grief opprest. William Drummond
Slight not what's near, when aiming at what's far. Euripides
Slit your wrists - it will lower your blood pressure.
Sloth, like rust, consumes faster than labor wears, while the used key is always bright. Benjamin Franklin
Slower Traffic Keep Right  -  Is that so difficult?
Slug Sautee: a hors of a different d'oeuvre.
Slurm, n.: The slime that accumulates on the underside of a soap bar when it sits in the dish too long. | Rich Hall, "Sniglets"
Smack your child every day. If you don't know why - he does. Joey Adams
Small change can often be found under seat cushions.
Small changes pick up the reins from nowhere.
Small crimes always precede great ones. Never have we seen timid innocence pass suddenly to extreme licentiousness. Jean Baptiste Racine
Small ills are the fountains of most of our groans. Men trip not on mountains, they stumble on stones. Chinese Proverb
Small opportunities are often the beginning of great enterprises.| Demosthenes
Small programs are for small minds.
Small things make base men proud.
Small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it.
Smash forehead on keyboard to continue
Smash forehead on keyboard to continue...
Smile  You're on Candid Modem
Smile - it makes people wonder what you're thinking.
Smile : things could get worse. And they will.
Smile You're on Candid Camera.
Smile if you are Jesus
Smile it makes people wonder what you've been up to.
Smile when you say "Damn Yankee."
Smile!	You're on Candid Camera.
Smile! It makes people wonder what you're up to.
Smile! Things can only get worse.
Smile, but sharpen your knives.
Smile, it makes the world wonder what you are up to.
Smile, things could get worse. And they will.
Smile, tomorrow will be worse.
Smile, you're on candid cookie.
Smile--makes people wonder what you've been up 2
Smile... people will wonder what you've been up to.
Smile... tomorrow will be much worse.
Smiley faces were meant to be annoying.
Smith & Wesson:  The original point and click interface.
Smith's Fourth Law of Inertia: A body at rest tends to watch television.
Smoke may indicate you have passed maximum performance.
Smoke no peaches.
Smoking is a leading cause of statistics.
Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics. Fletcher Knebel
Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics., Fletcher Knebel
Smoking is the leading cause of statistics today.
Smurf exterminator.
Snacktrek, n.: The peculiar habit, when searching for a snack, of constantly returning to the refrigerator in hopes that something new will have materialized. | Rich Hall, "Sniglets"
Snorting wildly, Worf actually smells his own feet.
Snow Day - stay home.
Snow and adolescence are the only problems that go away if ignored long enough.
Snow!  I want snow NOW!!!!
So Many Messages!.............So Little Time!
So dry & yet so wet.
So far as I can remember, there is not one word in the Gospels in praise of intelligence. Bertrand Russell
So far as I can remember, there is not one word in the Gospels in praise of intelligence. | Bertrand Russell
So if she weighs the same as a duck...
So it's my birthday. Big deal!!
So live that you can look any man in the eye and tell him to go to hell. Anonymous
So live that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip. Will Rogers
So many assholes, so few bullets | Ford Fairlane
So many bytes, so few cps.
So many damsels, so little time
So many idiots... too few flame-throwers...
So many lawyers, so few bullets.
So many men, so many opinions; every one his own way.
So many messages, so little time...
So many pedestrians, so little time...
So many taglines, so little time.
So many toys, so little time...
So much of our time is preparation, so much is routine, and so much retrospect, that the path of each man's genius contracts itself to a very few hours. Ralph Waldo Emerson
So much time, and so little to do.
So of cheerfulness, or a good temper, the more it is spent, the more of it remains. Ralph Waldo Emerson
So that's all there is!
So this is the secret of happiness
So unlucky that he runs into accidents which started out to happen to somebody else. Don Marquis
So what if I am a modem junky?
So what's the matter with MY taglines?
So why did they go from PS/2 to PS/1???
So you're back.
So, I hear you're into molinology...
So, Who thought up Taglines, Anyway??
So, as you go into battle, remember your ancestors and remember your descendants. Tacitus
So, my brother is human after all. | Robert Picard
So, where IS the <ANY> key ?
Social advance depends as much upon the process through which it is secured as upon the result itself. Jane Addams
Social innovations tend to the level of minimum tolerable well-being.
Socialism is the equal distribution of poverty.
Society is a madhouse whose wardens are the officials and the police. August Strindberg
Society is a mule, not a car; if pressed harder, it will kick and throw you off
Society is infested by persons who, seeing that the sentiments please, counterfeit the expression of them. These we call sentimentaliststalkers who mistake the description for the thing, saying for having. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Society is like a lawn where every roughness is smoothed, every bramble eradicated, and where the eye is delighted by the smiling verdure of a velvet surface. Washington Irving
Society is like air; very high up, it is sublimatedtoo low down, a perfect choke-damp. Anon.
Society like air, is necessary but not complete for life.
Society prepares the crime; the criminal commits it.
Society prepares the crime; the criminal commits it. Henryry`y`y`y`y Thomas Buckle
Sodd's Second Law: Sooner or later, the worst possible set of circumstances is bound to occur.
Software Bugs?  Exterminators 'R Us
Software Error: Programmer Held. Finish all activities
Software independent: Won't work with ANY software.
Software is never having to say you're done
Software means never having to say you're finished
Software unprotects, a hex change operation.
Software upgrade : to take old bugs out, to put new ones in.
Soldiers usually win the battles and generals get the credit for them. Napoleon Bonaparte
Solitude is painful when one is young, but delightful when one is more mature.| Albert Einstein
Solitude, though it may be silent as light, is like light, the mightiest of agencies; for solitude is essential to man. All men come into this world alone and leave it alone. Thomas De Quincey
Some Do, Some Don't, Some Will and Some Won't.
Some are so very studious of learning what was done by the ancients that they know not how to live with the moderns. William Penn
Some are weather-wise, some are otherwise.
Some assembly required.
Some books are to be tasted; others swallowed; and some to be chewed and digested. Francis Bacon
Some books leave us free and some books make us free. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Some cures are worse than the disease.
Some days I look my best in a thick fog.
Some days you're a bug, other days a windshield.
Some days you're a bug, some days you're a windshield.
Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant!
Some days, nothing goes left.
Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you set about retiring them. Ogden Nash
Some degree of novelty must be one of the materials in almost every instrument which works upon the mind; and curiosity blends itself, more or less, with all our pleasures. Edmund Burke
Some folks feel that beauty times brains is a constant.
Some girls never know what they are going to do from one husband to another. Tom Masson
Some men are discovered; others are found out.
Some men are like pyramids, which are very broad where they touch the ground, but grow narrow as they reach the sky. Henry Ward Beecher
Some men can live up to their loftiest ideals without ever going higher than a basement. Theodore Roosevelt
Some men change their party for the sake of their principles; others their principles for the sake of their party. Sir Winston Churchill
Some men do as much begrudge others a good name, as they want one themselves: and perhaps that is the reason of it. William Penn
Some men must follow, and some command, though all are made of clay. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Some minds should be cultivated, others plowed under...-
Some nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.
Some of mankind's most terrible misdeeds have been committed under the spell of certain magic words or phrases. James Bryant Conant
Some of the presidents were great and some of them weren't. I can say that, because I wasn't one of the great presidents, but I had a good time trying to be one, I can tell you that. Harry S Truman
Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enought to know they were impossible. Doug Larson
Some of us are like wheelbarrowsonly useful when pushed, and very easily upset. Jack Herbert
Some of us quit looking for work when we find a job.
Some people are afraid of heights.I'm afraid of widths
Some people are always critical of vague statements. I tend rather to be critical of precise statements; they are the only ones which can correctly be labeled 'wrong.' Raymond Smullyan
Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them. | Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"
Some people are educated beyond their intelligence.
Some people are paid to be good, but we're good for nothing.| Peter Campbell
Some people are so afraid to die that they never begin to live.
Some people are so afraid to die that they never begin to live. Henry Van Dyke
Some people are so nice to be nasty to.
Some people are, through no fault of their own, sane.
Some people aren't hard of hearing, but hard of listening.
Some people carve careers, others chisel them.
Some people cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
Some people fall for everything and stand for nothing.
Some people in this department wouldn't recognize subtlety if it hit them on the head.
Some people pay a compliment as if they expected a receipt. Kin Hubbard
Some people think "asphalt" is a rectal disorder.
Some people think George is weird, because he has sideburns behind his ears. I think George is weird, because he has false teeth. with braces on them. George is a radio announcer, and when he walks under a bridge...you can't hear him talk. Stephen Wright
Some people think that doctors and nurses can put scrambled eggs back into the shell. Dorothy Canfield Fisher
Some people try to find things in this game that don't exist but football is only two things, blocking and tackling. Vince Lombardi
Some people use one half their ingenuity to get into debt, and the other half to avoid paying it. George D. Prentice
Some people wanted champagne and caviar when they should have had beer and hot dogs. Dwight D. Eisenhower
Some people will believe anything if it is whispered to them.
Some persons are likeable in spite of their unswerving integrity. Don Marquis
Some problems are so complex that you have to be highly intelligent and well informed just to be undecided about them. Laurence J. Peter
Some remedies are worse than the diseases. Publilius Syrus
Some rise by sin and some by virtue fall.
Some salesmen can sell ice boxes to eskimos...well, "Bob" can sell them the ice.
Some taglines SHOULD be turned of
Some take their mark, others leave it
Some things are still sacred -- I haven't taken them apart.
Some things have got to be believed to be seen.
Some things have to be believed to be seen.
Some thoughts are best guillotined before actions result.
Some values are ... like sugar on the doughnut, legitimate, desirable, but insufficient, apart from the doughnut itself. We need substance as well as frosting. Ralph T. Flewelling
Somebody got up on the wrong side this morning. | Riker
Somebody hits me, I'm going to hit him back. Even if it does look like he hasn't eaten in a while. Charles Barkley, after elbowing an Angolan basketball player at the Olympic Games, 1992
Somebody ought to cross ball point pens with coat hangers so that the pens will multiply instead of disappear.
Somebody's terminal is dropping bits. I found a pile of them over in the corner.
Someday I hope to write a book where the royalties will pay for the copies I give away. Clarence Darrow
Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be. Rita Rudner
Somehow I have to believe that I'm worth all the aggravation I cause myself.
Somehow a bunch of sanctimonious wackos have managed to legalize torture. (Anonymous Airline Passenger), describing the US ban on smoking during airline flights, 1990
Somehow, I can't see myself doing it for money. | Geordi
Somehow, somewhere along the line, this town lost its pride.
Someone asked someone who was about my age: 'How are you?' The answer was, 'Fine. If you don't ask for details.' Katharine Hepburn
Someone close to you is taking advantage of your trust.
Someone is speaking well of you.
Someone is speaking well of you.  How unusual
Someone is speaking well of you.  How unusual!
Someone is unenthusiastic about your work.
Someone say "crash"? We all need hobbies!
Someone whom you reject today, will reject you tomorrow.
Someone will try to honk your nose today.
Something is rotten in the state of confusion.
Something's rotten in the state of Denmark.
Sometime they'll give a war and nobody will come. Carl Sandburg
Sometimes I think life is all just a pleasant dream.
Sometimes I wake up grouchy....Mostly I let her sleep.
Sometimes I wish I could get a mirror with a better view.
Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world. Lily Tomlin
Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world. | Lily Tomlin
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.
Sometimes let things happen but sometimes make things happen.
Sometimes men come by the name of genius in the same way that certain insects come by the name of centipedenot because they have a hundred feet, but because most people can't count above fourteen. G. C. Lichtenberg
Sometimes one pays most for the things one gets for nothing. Albert Einstein
Sometimes party loyalty asks too much. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
Sometimes silence is not goldenjust yellow. Anon.
Sometimes silence is the best way to yell at the top of your voice.
Sometimes the best defense is a skillful surrender.
Sometimes the best gain is to lose. George Herbert
Sometimes the obvious works best !
Sometimes the only solution is to find a new problem.
Sometimes they just grow, and grow, and grow...
Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.
Sometimes we may learn more from a man's errors, than from his virtues. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Sometimes wrong, but never in doubt.
Sometimes you get beer, sometimes beer gets you.
Sometimes you have to get to know someone really well to realize you're really strangers. Mary Tyler Moore
Sometimes you're a bug..Sometimes you're a windshield!
Sometimes, I wish I could PKZIP my wife !
Somtimes something worth doing is worth overdoing. David Letterman, CBS Late Show, 1994
Sooner or later you must pay for your sins.  (Those who have already paid may disregard this fortune).
Sooner or later, the worst possible set of circumstances is bound to occur.
Sophia Loren Mistakes are part of the dues one pays for a full life. Sophia Loren
Sorrow makes men sincere. Henry Ward Beecher
Sorrow: a kind of rust of the soul, which every new idea contributes in its passage to scour away. Samuel Johnson
Sorry about that Chief| Maxwell Smart
Sorry about your Rectocranial Inversion.
Sorry, I don't date outside my species.|Bumper sticker
Sorry, I forgot all about the Amnesia Conference
Sorry, I forgot all about the Amnesia conference!
Sorry, I haven't got time to understand anything.
Sorry, but my karma just ran over your dogma.
Sorry, computer foul-up
Sorry, computer foul-up!
Sorry, my english is not very good. No punt intended.
Sorry, no fortune this time.
Sorry, the brain you have reached is disconnected.
Sorry.
Sorry.	Nice try.
Sorry. Nice try.
Sorry... my mind has a few bad sectors.
Sound, sound the clarion, fill the fife! To all the sensual world proclaim, One crowded hour of glorious strife Is worth an age without a name. -Sir Walter Scott
Southern DOS:  Y'all reckon? [yep/nope]
Sow an act and you reap a habit. Sow a habit and you reap a character. Sow a character and you reap a destiny. Charles Reade
Space is an illusion, disk space doubly so.
Space is big.  Really big.
Space is big.  You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the drug store, but that's just peanuts to space. | "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"
Spaced Aliens:  Columbian drug lords in US.
Spaghetti code = job security.
Spaghetti code means job security.
Spam Spam Spam Spam, Spammity Spammmm, Spam, Spam, Spam
Spam for me, with a side of crunchy frog.
Spare the rod and spoil the drag race.
Spare time?  You're lookin' at it.
Spark's Sixth Rule for Managers: If a subordinate asks you a pertinent question, look at him as if he had lost his senses.  When he looks down, paraphrase the question back at him.
Sparky, Sparky, Bo-Farky. Banana Fana Fo-Farky ..
Speak clearley, if you speak at all; carve every word before you let it fall. Oliver Wendel Holmes, Jr.
Speak clearly, if you speak at all; carve every word before you let it fall. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Speak not of my debts unless you mean to pay them.
Speak not of my debts unless you mean to pay them. George Herbert
Speak not too well of one who scarce will know Himself transfigured in its roseate glow; Say kindly of him what is, chiefly, true, Remembering always he belongs to you; Deal with him as a truant, if you will, But claim him, keep him, call him brother still! Oliver Wendell Holmes
Speak of the devil and he appears. Italian Proverb
Speak softly and carry a +6 two-handed sword.
Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far. Theodore Roosevelt
Speak softly and carry a two-handed sword.
Speak softly, and carry a big stick; you will go far. Theodore Roosevelt
Speaking much is a sign of vanity, for he that is lavish with words is a niggard in deed. Sir Walter Raleigh
Speaking only for myself, one of my many tricks.
Speaking without thinking is like shooting without taking aim.
Speculation is only a word covering the making of money out of the manipulation of prices, instead of supplying goods and services. Henry Ford
Speech is human nature itself, with none of the artificiality of written language. Alfred North Whitehead
Speech is power: speech is to persuade, to convert, to compel. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Speed costs money. How fast do you want to go ?
Speedy Gonzales knows every ones seester
Spell chequers dew knot work write.
Spelling problems? use "error-correcting" modems!
Spellings: Compatible, definitely, protocol.
Spend enough time confirming the need and the need will disappear.
Spend extra time on hobby.  Get plenty of rolling papers.
Spend sufficient time confirming the need and the need will disappear. Ed's Fifth Rule of Procrastination
Spice is the variety of life.
Spice up your love life....kiss a Klingon today
Spill a drink on your hard drive?  Try PC Towels...
Spilling your guts out is just as charming as it sounds.
Spirited, restive flea, become a Buddha by my hand! Issa
Spirtle, n.: The fine stream from a grapefruit that always lands right in your eye. | Sniglets, "Rich Hall & Friends"
Split personality?  Who, us?
Spock at Xmas: A pencil sharpener for my ears Thanx, Jim
Spock, you are such a putz
Spock, you are such a putz !
Spock... you're such a putz.
Spock/Data 1996: The Logical Choice
Spock:	We suffered 23 casualties in that attack, Captain.
Spock: We suffered 23 casualties in that attack, Captain.
Spoken language is merely a series of squeaks. Alfred North Whitehead
Sponges grow in the ocean. That just kills me. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be if that didn't happen. Stephen Wright
Spouse, n.: Someone who'll stand by you through all the trouble you wouldn't have had if you'd stayed single.
Spread the table and contention will cease. English Proverb
Spring comes with flowers, autumn with the moon, summer with the breeze, winter with snow. When idle concerns don't fill your thoughts, that's your best season. Wu-Men
Spring makes everything young again except humans.
Squeeze my Lemon, till the juice runs down my leg...
St. Louis Music: Someone to Stay With
Stability itself is nothing else than a more sluggish motion.
Stagecoach -- Drama teacher
Stamp out philately!
Stamp out philately.
Stand down from battle stations, and Ensign change your phaser
Stand on the toilet, get high on pot.
Stand your ground. Don't fire unless fired upon, but if they mean to have a war, let it begin here. John Parker
Standards are wonderful! So many to choose from!
Standards are wonderful: so many from which to choose
Standing on head makes smile of frown, but rest of face also upside down.
Standing on your head makes a smile of a frown, but the rest of your face is also upside down.
Standing there making a sitting target of himself.
Star Trek III: The Search for Plot.  "Spock's brain."
Star Trek XXVII - The Search for Shatner's Teeth.
Start slow and taper off.
State Farm?  Guard dogs?
Stationary mice have bigger balls. (c)1991
Statistics are no substitute for judgement.
Statistics are used as a drunk uses lampposts--for support, not illumination.
Statistics can be used to support anything, especially statisticians.
Status symbol: foam-rubber wind chimes.
Stay away from flying saucers today.
Stay away from hurricanes for a while.
Stay back  I have a modem and I know how to use it
Stay back ! I have a modem and I know how to use it !
Stay back I have a modem and I know how to use it
Steadfastness is a noble quality, but unguided by knowledge or humility it becomes rashness or obstinacy. J. Swarlz
Steal my cash, car and TV - but leave the computer!
Steal my wallet, car and TV -- but leave the computer !
Steal this Tag Line.
Stealing a rhinoceros should not be attempted lightly.
Stealth condoms: she'll never even see you coming...
Stealth tagline -->
Steer clear of incorrect forms of verbs that have snuck in the language.
Steinbach's Guideline for Systems Programming Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle.
Step on no pets!
Stephen Wright I had to stop driving my car for a while...the tires got dizzy. I have a map of the United States...actual size. It says, 'Scale: 1 mile = 1 mile.' I spent last summer folding it. I also have a full-size map of the world. I hardly ever unroll it. Stephen Wright
Stephen Wright Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?
Stepping on people's toes messes up their shine.
Sterility is hereditary.
Stick to your talent and the cows will be well tended.
Sticks and stones will break my bones, but names will never hurt me. English Proverb
Still couldn't get no Dynamo Humm...
Still going  Nothing outlasts Data  He keeps going and going and...
Still going! Nothing outlasts Data..he keeps going and go
Still waters run deep. English Proverb
Stillness of person and steadiness of features are signal marks of good breeding. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Stipulation #1 : there will be no stipulations.
Stolen taglines are the sincerest form of flattery.
Stop Thinking.  Accept "Bob."  Exterminate Normals.  Amen.
Stop censorship now, before it stops you!
Stop day dreaming about success. Go out and obtain it.
Stop searching forever.  Happiness is just next to you.
Stop searching forever.  Happiness is unattainable.
Stop searching forever. Happiness is just next to you.
Stop searching forever. Happiness is unattainable.
Stop searching.  Happiness is right next to you.
Stop searching.  Happiness is right next to you.  Now, if they'd only take a bath ...
Stop smirking Number One.
Stop tagline theft ! Copyright your tagline (c) !
Stop tagline theft Copyright your tagline (c)
Stop the World, I want to throw up.
Stop what you're doing and TAKE A SHOWER
Stop while you're a Thread......
Stove Top?  I'm stayin'!
Straight trees have crooked roots.
Strange but not a stranger...
Strangely, Data finds himself relating to heavy metal.
Stranger in a strange country. | Sophocles (406 BC)
Streakers repent Your end is in sight.
Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will. Mahatma Gandhi
Strength is born in the deep silence of long-suffering hearts; not amid joy. Felicia Hemans
Strength of mind: Person who can eat one salted peanut.
Stress- n. Doing a tight 180-dregree U-turn at Warp 9.5.
Stress:  Doing a tight 180 at warp 9.5.
Strike any user when ready...
Strike while the iron is hot Proverb
Strike while the iron is hot.
Strip mining prevents forest fires.
Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing. Harriet Braiker
Stroking a furry pussy will get you scratched.
Structured Programming - a technique which creates beautiful looking code which doesn't work.
Study as if you were going to live forever; live as if you were going to die tomorrow. Maria Mitchell
Study men, not historians. Harry S Truman
Study the past if you would divine the future. Confucius
Stult's Report: Our problems are mostly behind us.  What we have to do now is fight the solutions.
Stupid: Losing $25 on the game and $25 on the instant replay.
Stupidity does not qualify as a handicap, park elsewhere!
Stupidity has no limits, genius does.
Stupidity is no excuse for not thinking.
Stupidity is not a handicap.  Park elsewhere!
Stupidity is not a handicap. Go park somewhere else.
Stupidity is not an impeachable offense.
Stupidity isn't a condition, it's a career!
Sturgeon's Law:  Ninety percent of everything is crud.
Sturgeon's Law: 90% of everything is crud.
Style may not be the answer, but at least it's a workable alternative.
SubGenius is now a lowing herd of consumers with an upper crust of yuppie snobs.
Subvert the dominant paradigm!
Subway: A place so crowded even men can't all get seats.
Success and failure are greatly overrated. But failure gives you a whole lot more to talk about. Hildegard Knef
Success can make you go one of two ways. It can make you a prima donna, or it can smooth the edges, take away the insecurities, let the nice things come out. Barbara Walters
Success comes in a can. Failure comes in a can not.
Success has a thousand fathers, but failure is an orphan.
Success has always been a great liar. Friedrich Nietzsche
Success has ruined many a good man.
Success in marriage is not so much finding the right person as it is being the right person. Anonymous
Success is a journey, not a destination.
Success is a journey, not a destination.| Ben Sweetland
Success is a matter of luck; just ask any failure.
Success is a public affair. Failure is a private funeral. Rosiland Russel
Success is having a flair for the thing that you are doing; knowing that is not enough, that you have got to have hard work and a sense of purpose. Margaret Thatcher
Success is just a matter of luck.  Ask any failure.
Success is never final. Winston Churchill
Success is not permanent, neither is failure.
Success is the child of audacity. Benjamin Disraeli
Success is the necessary misfortune of life, but it is only to the very unfortunate that it comes early. Anthony Troloppe
Success lies in achieving the top of the foodchain.
Succumb to natural tendencies.	Be hateful and boring.
Succumb to natural tendencies.  Be hateful and boring.
Succumb to natural tendencies. Be hateful and boring.
Such power there is in clear-eyed self-restraint. James Russell Lowell
Suddenly things are going better than I ever expected.
Suffering Sacatash| Sylvester the Cat
Suffering becomes beautiful when anyone bears great calamities with cheerfulness, not through insensibility but through greatness of mind. Aristotle
Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!
Suicide is confession and confession is suicide.
Suicide is the most sincere form of self criticism.
Suit the action to the word, the word to the action. William Shakespeare
Sumo Wrestling: survival of the fattest.
Sunshine is delicious, rain is refreshing, wind braces up, snow is exhilarating; there is no such thing as bad weather, only different kinds of good weather. John Ruskin
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocius
Supercompetence is more objectionable than incompetence.
Superfluous wealth can buy superfluities only. Henry David Thoreau
Supernovae are a Blast
Superstition is ... religion which is incongruous with intelligence. John Tyndall
Superstition is a senseless fear of God. Cicero
Superstition is the poison of the mind. Joseph Lewis
Superstition is the religion of feeble minds. Edmund Burke
Superstition, idolatry, and hypocrisy have ample wages, but truth goes begging. Martin Luther
Superstitions are, for the most part, but the shadows of great truths. Tryon Edwards
Support DAMM--Drunks Against Mad Mothers!
Support Freeware ! Support Freeware !
Support Medical Examiners.  Die strangely.
Support Mental Health. Or I'll kill you.
Support Shareware ! Support Shareware !
Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have
Support national motherhood week - make one today
Support the Right to Keep and Arm Bears!!
Support the helpless victims of computers.
Support wildlife, take a SysOp to lunch
Support wildlife, throw a party.
Support your consultant - they have needs also.
Support your local AAAAA!
Support your local church.  Worship at Bank of America.
Support your local medical examiner: die strangely.
Sure I'm for helping the elderly. I'm going to be old myself someday. Lillian Carter (at age 85)
Sure fire diet, swallowing pride.
Sure, I may look like a white man. But my heart is a black as anyone's here. George Wallace (during a presidential campaign speech to a largely
Sure, Patrick, but will the Pontiac do warp nine?
Sure, drinking kills brain cells, but only the weak ones.
Sure, luck means a lot in football. Not having a good quarterback is bad luck. Don Schula, Miami Dolphins Football Coach, 1994
Sure, we just route the main sensor through Data's cat.
Sure, when...OINK FLAP OINK FLAP...Well I'll be damned!
Surf Nicaragua
Surly grammarians insist that all words ending in "ly" are adverbs.
Surly to bed, and surly to rise.
Surplus wealth is a sacred trust which its possessor is bound to administer in his lifetime for the good of the community. Andrew Carnegie
Surprise  You are the lucky winner of random I.R.S. Audit  Just type in your name and social security number.  Please remember that leaving the room is punishable under law: Name	#
Surprise due today.  Also the rent.
Surprise your boss.  Get to work on time.
Surrender now -- before I have to offer you better terms.
Surround yourself with people who believe your lies.
Survival of the species is everyone's business.
Suspicion always haunts the guilty mind. William Shakespeare
Suspicion poisons a friendship.
Suspicions which may be unjust need not be stated. Abraham Lincoln
Swallow your pride, it is non-fattening.
Swallowing angry words is much easier than having to eat them.
Swap read error.  You lose your mind.
Swap read error. You lose your mind.
Swastikas, skulls and crossbones, dice flashing snakeeyes
Sweet April showers do spring May flowers.
Sweet is the scene where genial friendship plays The pleasing game of interchanging praise. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Sweet mercy is nobility's true badge. William Shakespeare
Swell-head: Nature's frantic effort to fill a vacuum.
Swipple's Rule of Order: He who shouts the loudest has the floor.
Swish, two, three, four!  Swish, two, three, four!
Swords to Ploughs? Wouldn't they be small?
Sympathy is a virtue unknown in nature. Paul Eipper
Synonym: A word used when you can't spell the first one.
Syntactic sugar causes cancer of the semi-colons;
Syntax? Why not, they tax everything else
Syntax? Why not? They tax everything else!
Sysoping: More fun than being beaten with a sledgehammer
Sysoping: Not just an adventure, it's a job..
System Crash  (A)bort (R)etry (T)hrowup
System checkpoint complete.
System going down at 1:45 this afternoon for disk crashing.
System maintenance about to begin.
System restarting, wait.
System/3  System/3 See how it runs  See how it runs Its monitor loses so totally It runs all its programs in RPG It's made by our favorite monopoly System/3 | To the tune of 3 blind mice
Systems Recruiting in the US & Canada
Systems programmers are the high priests of a low cult.
T'greatest griefs are those we cause ourselves. | Sophocles
TANSTAAFL !
TANSTAAFL ! -- Robert Anson Heinlein
TARFU : Things are Really Fouled Up.
TAURUS (Apr 20 - May 20) You are practical and persistent.  You have a dogged determination and work like hell.  Most people think you are stubborn and bull headed. You are a Communist.
TECHNICALITY:  Someone *ELSES* Constitutional rights..
THE ARMY AXIOM: Any order that can be misunderstood has been misunderstood.
THE CARDINAL CONUNDRUM: An optimist believes we live in the best of all possible worlds. A pessimist fears this is true.
THE EXTENDED MURPHY'S LAW: If a series of events can go wrong, it will do so in the worst possible sequence.
THE GENERAL LAW: The chaos in the universe always increases.
THE GOLDEN RULE OF ARTS AND SCIENCES The one who has the gold makes the rules.
THE GOLDEN RULE: He who has the gold makes the rules
THE GOLDEN RULE: Whoever has the gold makes the rules.
THE GREEN THUMB LAW: The life of a house plant varies inversely with its price and directly with its ugliness.
THE PET PRINCIPLE: No matter which side of the door the cat or dog is on, it's the wrong side.
THE PINK thinks there are rules for winning and losing; THE SUBGENIUS knows that every rule in the book WILL be broken, except this one.
THE PROGRAMMERS' CHEER? -- SHIFT TO THE LEFT, SHIFT TO THE RIGHT POP UP, PUSH DOWN, BYTE, BYTE, BYTE
THE ROAD TO SUCCESS IS ALWAYS UNDER CONSTRUCTION.
THE THEOREM THEOREM: If if, then then.
THE UNAPPLICABLE LAW: Washing your car to make it rain doesn't work.
THE WATERGATE PRINCIPLE: Government corruption will always be reported in the past tense.
THERE IS NO JUSTICE : THERE IS ONLY ME.
THINE'S LAW: Nature abhors people.
THIS IS AN EX-PARROT
THIS TAGLINE NOT TO BE REMOVED UNDER PENALTY OF LAW.
THIS definitely takes, eats and shits the cake.
THOM'S LAW OF MARITAL BLISS: The length of a marriage is inversely proportional to the cost of the wedding.
THUGS EAT THEN ROB PROPRIETOR
TODD'S FIRST LAW: All things being equal, you lose.
TODD'S POLITICAL PRINCIPLE: No matter what they're talking about, they're talking about money.
TOO MUCH is always better than not enough.
TOOD'S SECOND LAW: No matter what they're telling you, it's not the whole truth.
TOS,TAS,TMP,TWOK,TSFS,TVH,TNG,TFF,????
TOURIST SEASON! DOES that mean we can shoot them?
TROI: I feel pain, GREAT pain ... RIKER: Glad you liked it
TRUMAN'S LAW: If you cannot convince them, confuse them.
TRUTH, n. An ingenious compound of desirability and appearance. Discovery of truth is the sole purpose of philosophy, which is the most ancient occupation of the human mind and has a fair prospect of existing with increasing activity to the end of time. Ambrose Bierce
TSR : Trash System Randomly.
TSR's!!!!!   Bah! Humbug!
TSR: Trash System Randomly
TV Truth: All problems can be solved in 30-60 minutes.
TV advertising is the rattling inside a swill bucket.
TV is a crutch for those who lack imagination.
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.
TV is chewing gum for the eyes.| Frank Lloyd Wright
TWO THINGS ARE UNIVERSAL. HYDROGEN AND STUPIDITY.
Tact - changing the subject without changing the mind.
Tact consists in knowing how far to go too far. Jean Cocteau
Tact is after all a kind of mind reading. Sarah Orne Jewett
Tact is for weenies.
Tact is getting your point across without stabbing someone with it.
Tact is knowing how far to go in going too far.
Tact is one of the first mental virtues, the absence of which is often fatal to the best of talents; it supplies the place of many talents. William Gillmore Simms
Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves. Abraham Lincoln
Tact is the ability to tell a man he has an open mind when he has a hole in his head.
Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy.
Tact is the intelligence of the heart.
Tact is the knack of making a point without making an enemy. Howard W. Newton
Tact is the unsaid part of what you're thinking.
Tact, n.: The unsaid part of what you're thinking.
Tact: Recalling a lady's birthday but forgetting her age.
Tact: knowing how far to go too far.
Tact: making a point without making an enemy.
Tact: the ability to describe others as they see themselves. Abraham Lincoln
Tact: to lie about others as you would have them lie about you. Oliver Herford
Tag - Your it! How childish...
Tag line #27 : see appendix C, page 245.
Tag line #27, See Apendix C, pg 245
Tag line thievery..Comin' up next on Geraldo.
Tag..... You're it!
Tagito ergo sum (I tag, therefore I am).
Tagline Lotto: 2222222222<- Scratch here for prize.
Tagline Serial No.10397 - (C) 1993, All rights reserved ...
Tagline delivery delayed due to bad roads.
Tagline error.  Contact your systems programmer.
Tagline explodes, destroys BBS. Film at 11
Tagline frequencies are Open....
Tagline shortage. Please help recycle taglines.
Tagline theft is a compliment.
Tagline wanted. Apply within ====================>
Tagline, You're it!
Tagline?
Taglines : one line freedom of speech !
Taglines are for idiots.
Taglines are for morons.
Taglines are irrelevant. You will be assimilated
Taglines cause cancer.
Taglines mean nothing to me!
Taglines that make you go "Hmmm..."
Taglines wanted!
Taglines. The bumperstickers of BBS'ing.
Taglines...one line freedom of speech!
Taglines...the electronic "bumper sticker"...
Taglines?  Taglines?  I doan wan' no stinkin' taglines!
Take a bite out of crime .. Abolish the IRS
Take advantage of the pleasurable opportunities that come your way.
Take an astronaut to launch.
Take calculated risks. That is quite different from being rash. George S. Patton
Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves.
Take care that the face that looks out from the mirror in the morning is a pleasant face. You may not see it again during the day, but others will. Anonymous
Take care to be an economist in prosperity. There is no fear of your being one in adversity. Johann Georg von Zimmerman
Take egotism out, and you castrate the benefactors.
Take everything in stride.  Trample anyone who gets in your way.
Take heart amid the deepening gloom that your dog is finally getting enough cheese | National Lampoon, "Deteriorada"
Take it easy, we're in a hurry.
Take my advice, I don't use it anyway.
Take my advice... I'm not using it.
Take my word for it, the silliest woman can manage a clever man, but it needs a very clever woman to manage a fool. | Kipling
Take no friends and leave no enemies.
Take pot to the beach; leave no tern unstoned.
Take the antiderivative of (tan 3x^2)/5x...
Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixed metaphors.
Take the course opposite to custom and you will almost always do well. Jean Jacques Rousseau
Take time for all things: great haste makes great waste. Benjamin Franklin
Take time to develop your personality.
Take time to smell the roses and eventually you'll inhale a bee.
Take time to travel; your troubles will unravel.
Take two crows and caw me in the morning.
Take what comfort there may be in owning a piece thereof.
Take your dying with some seriousness, however.  Laughing on the way to your execution is not generally understood by less advanced life forms, and they'll call you crazy. | "Messiah's Handbook: Reminders for the Advanced Soul"
Take your work seriously, but never yourself. Dame Margot Fonteyn
Taken as a whole, the universe is absurd.
Talent alone cannot make a writer. There must be a man behind the book. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Talk back, tremblin' lips!
Talk is cheap because Supply exceeds Demand.
Talk is cheap because supply inevitably exceeds demand...
Talk is cheap since supply exceeds demand.
Talk is cheap unless you hire a lawyer.
Talk is cheap, because supply exceeds demand!
Talk is cheap, until you hire a lawyer.
Talk is cheap.  Using a modem gets expensive.
Talk not of wasted affection; affection never was wasted. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.
Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.  | Euripides
Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish. | Euripides
Talkers are no good doers.
Talkers are no good doers. | William Shakespeare, "Henry VI"
Talking comes by nature, Silence by wisdom.
Talking is another disease of age.
Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself. | Friedrich Nietzsche
Talking of bulls is not like being in the bull ring.
Tallulah Bankhead barged down the Nile last night as Cleopatra and sank.
Tampons $1 a dozen! No strings attatched!
Tanstaafl.
Taste is the feminine of genius. Edward FitzGerald
Taste is, so to speak, the microscope of the judgment. Jean Jacques Rousseau
Taste: a quality possessed by persons without originality or moral courage. George Bernard Shaw
Taurus Excretum Ad Infinitum....
Tax forms should read "income owed us" and "in commode you".
Tax reform means "Don't tax you, don't tax me, tax that fellow behind the tree." | Russell Long
Taxes are not levied for the benefit of the taxed.
Taxes are the sinews of the state. Cicero
Taxes, n.: Of life's two certainties, the only one for which you can get an extension.
Taxpayers don't have to take a civil service exam to work for the government.
Tea, Earl Grey, Hot. And computer...in a cup this time?
Teach children to be polite and courteous in the home, and, when he grows up, he will never be able to edge his car onto a freeway.
Teach me to feel another's woe, To hide the fault I see: That mercy I to others show, That mercy show to me Alexander Pope
Teach us that wealth is not elegance, that profusion is not magnificence, that splendor is not beauty. Benjamin Disraeli
Teacher, tender comrade, wife, A fellow-farer true through life. Robert Louis Stevenson
Teachers can change lives with just the right mix of chalk and challenges. Joyce A. Myers
Teachers have class.
Teaching is the art of assisting discovery.
Teaching is the fine art of imparting knowledge without possessing it.
Teaching is the greatest act of optimism. Colleen Wilcox
Teaching was the hardest work I had ever done, and it remains the hardest work I have done to date. Ann Richards
Teaching: Appearing to have known your subject forever.
Teamwork gives you someone else to blame.
Teamwork is essential -- it allows you to blame someone else.
Teamwork is essential. It gives them another target.
Teamwork is vital (it gives you someone to blame.)
Teamwork is vital! (It gives you someone to blame.)
Techno Pagan.
Technological Civilization: Redundant or Contradictory?
Technological progress has merely provided us with more efficient means for going backwards. | Aldous Huxley
Technology don't transfer. Stenton's Law
Technology is dominated by two types of people: Those who understand what they do not manage. Those who manage what they do not understand. | Putt's Law
Ted Kennedy Party Tip - Take Off Pants, Mingle
Ted Kennedy's Bumper Sticker: My other car is underwater
Ted Kennedy's Bumper Sticker: My other car is underwater.
Teen Lesbian Nazi Hookers Raped by UFOs! - Geraldo
Teenagers are people who express a burning desire to be different by dressing exactly alike. Anonymous
Teeth were not made for stripping wires.
Telecommunicators are special people.
Television a medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well-done. Ernie Kovacs
Television has changed the American child from an irresistible force to an immovable object. Laurence J. Peter
Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other. Ann Landers
Television has raised writing to a new low. Samuel Goldwyn
Television is a corporate vulgarity. John Leonard
Television is now so desparately hungry for material that they're scraping the top of the barrel. Gore Vidal
Television is to media what hydrogen bombs are to explosives.
Television: A Medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done.
Tell a child he got 1 right, not 99 wrong.
Tell a lie and find the truth.
Tell it to the Judge
Tell me and I'll forget. Show me, and I may not remember. Involve me, and I'll understand. Native American Proverb
Tell me more about these "habits". | Beverly
Tell me who's your friend and I'll tell you who you are. Russian proverb
Tell the truth and run.
Tell the truth and you won't have so much to remember.
Tell the truth, and so puzzle and confound your adversaries. Henry Wotton
Telling lies and showing off to get attention are mistakes I made that I don't want my kids to make. Jane Fonda
Temper is what gets most of us into trouble. Pride is what keeps us there.
Temper your enjoyments with prudence, lest there be written on your heart that fearful word 'satiety.' Francis Quarles
Temperate temperance is best; intemperate temperance injures the cause of temperance. Mark Twain
Temporary suspension of disbelief is a wonderful thing.
Temptation is an irresistible force at work on a moveable body. H. L. Mencken
Ten weeks from Friday will be a pretty good day.
Ten years of rejection slips is nature's way of telling you to stop writing. | R. Geis
Tennis is irrelevant. | Bjorn Borg
Terminal Emulation - lying stiffly on your back, with your hands folded across your chest.
Terminator bumpersticker: I TIME TRAVEL NAKED.
Territory is but the body of a nation. The people who inhabit its hills and valleys are its soul, its spirit, its life. James A. Garfield
Terror:  A female Klingon with PMS.
Test tube babies get a womb with a view.....
Test-tube babies shouldn't throw stones.
Testing One... Fiftythree... fortytwo...
Tetris tagline:             
Texas Toilet paper, it don't take s**t off anyone.
Th vwls n m kbrd dn't wrk vry wll, d thy??
Th% tagline % compressed.
Thank goodness I was never sent to school; it would have rubbed off some of the originality. Beatrix Potter
Thank you for holding your breath while I smoke.
Thank you for not annoying me more than you do...
Thank you for observing all safety precautions.
Thank you for reading this message !
Thank you for the wonderful tag line
Thank you very little.
Thank you, God. Keep it up
Thank you.
Thanks for the tagline.  :-)
That Rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide
That ain't so good English!
That cause is strong which has not a multitude, but one strong man behind it. James Russell Lowell
That concept looks like a chicken in a windstorm.
That does not compute.
That is a good book which is opened with expectation and closed in profit. Amos Bronson Alcott
That is a two part question ...
That is not to say that we can relax our readiness to defend ourselves. Our armament must be adequate to the needs, but our faith is not primarily in these machines of defense but in ourselves. Chester Nimitz
That is suitable to a man, in point of ornamental expense, not which he can afford to have, but which he can afford to lose. Richard Whately
That is true culture which helps us to work for the social betterment of all. Henry Ward Beecher
That it is better 100 guilty Persons should escape than that one innocent Person should suffer, is a Maxim that has been long and generally approved. Benjamin Franklin
That man is idle who can do something better. Ralph Waldo Emerson
That man is richest whose pleasures are cheapest. Henry David Thoreau
That man is the richest whose pleasures are the cheapest. Henry David Thoreau
That man who lives for self alone, Lives for the meanest mortal known. Joaquin Miller
That miscellaneous collection of a few wise and many foolish individuals, called the public. John Stuart Mill
That must be wonderful  I don't understand it at all.
That must be wonderful!  I don't understand it at all.
That must be wonderful! I don't understand it at all.
That must be wonderful; I don't understand it at all. Molier.
That secret you've been guarding, isn't.
That so few now dare to be eccentric marks the chief danger of the time. John Stuart Mill
That tagline is TRUE -> <- That tagline is FALSE
That that is is not that that is not.
That virtue we appreciate is as much ours as another's. We see so much only as we possess. Henry David Thoreau
That was ZEN -- this is TAO
That was a pointing device? My cat thought it was dinner.
That was so fast, can you show me one more time? | Troi
That wasn't me... My farts smell like candy!
That which is called firmness in a king is called obstinacy in a donkey. Lord Erskine
That which is everybody's business is nobody's business. Izaak Walton
That which is given with pride and ostentation is rather an ambition than a bounty. Seneca
That which is not good for the swarm, neither is it good for the bee.
That which makes people dissatisfied with their condition, is the chimerical idea they form of the happiness of others. James Thomson
That which needs to be proved cannot be worth much. - Nietzsche
That which ordinary men are fit for, I am qualified in. and the best of me is diligence. William Shakespeare
That which seems the height of absurdity in one generation often becomes the height of wisdom in the next. John Stuart Mill
That which we resist the most is what we become.
That woman speaks eight languages and can't say "no" in any of them. | Dorothy Parker
That'll be $67.50  CCCHHHHHIIIIINNNNGGGG!!!!
That's Bond, James Bond, double-oh-seven..
That's Captain Q to you   Q
That's a nice dress - could I talk you out of it?|Pick up line
That's a smug aura of respectability you see in a mirror?
That's about the sum of it.
That's enough, Data
That's great, I'm only seven wins away from my first grand slam title. Justin Gimelstob-UCLA freshman, ranked 1,154 in the world, upon gaining a wildcard bid to the US Open Tennis Championships, 1995
That's inches away from being millimetre perfect.
That's like fluffing the pillows on the Titanic
That's not a Bug, that's an Enhanced Feature.
That's not a bug : it's an undocumented feature.
That's not a bug : it's supposed to do that.
That's not a bug, it's a FEATURE!
That's not a bug, that's a feature.
That's not a bug--it's an undocumented feature!
That's not a bug. It's supposed to do that.
That's not a tagline It's Odo | Sisko
That's not line noise--my modem's speaking in tongues!
That's odd -- I had a tagline when I came in here...
That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for Mankind.| Neil Armstrong
That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind. Neil Armstrong
That's right, try hard to be good at the game of life.
That's the nuttiest idea you've had, Counselor. | Geordi
That's what she said.
That's what's cool about working with computers. They don't argue, they remember everything and they don't drink all your beer. Paul Leary, guitar player, 1991
That's why God made your eyes : to plagiarize.
The "Any" key?  See the one in the back marked "power"?
The "C" in Rap is silent.
The 11th COMMANDMENT - Thou shalt not be a smartass!
The 1990 's shure aren't like the 1980 's Donald Trump, hotel and casino owner, 1990
The 486SX: Intel's test of your gullibility
The Abort, Retry, Fail ?
The Abrams' Principle: The shortest distance between two points is off the wall.
The American people have a right to air that they and their children can breathe without fear. Lyndon Baines Johnson
The American people would not want to know of any misquotes that Dan Quayle may or may not make. | Vice President Dan Quayle
The American presidency will demand more than ringing manifestos issued from the rear of the battle. It will demand that the President place himself in the very thick of the fight; that he care passionately about the fate of the people he leads ... John Fitzgerald Kennedy
The American wage earner and the American housewife are a lot better economists than most economists care to admit. They know that a government big enough to give you everything you want is a government big enough to take from you everything you have. Gerald R. Ford
The Answer is 42.
The Army has carried the American ... ideal to its logical conclusion. Not only do they prohibit discrimination on the grounds of race, creed and color, but also on ability. | T. Lehrer
The Army needs leaders the way a foot needs a big toe. | Bill Murray
The Bible and the Church have been the greatest stumbling blocks in the way of women's emancipation. Elizabeth Cady Stanton
The Bible is a window in this prison of hope, through which we look into eternity. John Sullivan Dwight
The Bible may be the truth, but it is not the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Samuel Butler
The Bill of Rights The Original Contract With America. Accept no substitutes. Beware of imitations. Insist on the genuine articles. Anon
The Borg - plastic surgery taken too far.
The Borg are coming  Quick  Try and look useless
The Borg are coming! Quick! Try and look useless!!
The Boy Scouts have adult leadership. The Air Force doesn't.
The Boy Scouts have adult leadership. The Army doesn't.
The Boy Scouts have adult leadership. The Coast Guard doesn't.
The Boy Scouts have adult leadership. The Marines don't.
The Boy Scouts have adult leadership. The Navy doesn't.
The Bozos are coming.
The Briggs/Chase Law of Program Development: To determine how long it will take to write and debug a program, take your best estimate, multiply that by two, add one, and convert to the next higher units.
The Buck Stops Here Harry S. Truman
The Buck stops here, the Dough just visits..
The COBOL Crisis: But it worked in test !.
The Christian religion not only was at first attended with miracles, but even at this day cannot be believed by any reasonable person without one. David Hume
The Church says that the earth is flat, but I know that it is round, for I have seen the shadow on the moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church. Ferdinand Magellan
The Civil War is not ended: I question whether any serious civil war ever does end. T. S. Eliot
The Commission believes there is a grave danger that some communities may resort to the indiscriminate and excessive use of force. The harmful effects of overreaction are incalculable. Commission on Civil Disorder, 1968
The Computer is impressed with Data's hardware.
The Constitution is not a panacea for every blot upon the public welfare, nor should this Court, ordained as a judicial body, be thought of as a general haven for reform movements. John Marshall Harlan
The Constitution is the sole source and guaranty of national freedom. Calvin Coolidge
The Counselor and I will be indisposed today. | Riker
The Course of Progress: Most things get steadily worse.	The Path of Progress: A shortcut is the longest distance between two points. | Issawi's Laws of Progress:
The Crown is full of it Nate Harris, 1775
The Czech's in the mail. Sending Frenchman by FAX.
The Day of Judgement is approaching, or it is not.
The Dead Shall Walk the Earth and Dine on Flesh
The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn. The Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work and then they get elected and prove it. P.J. O'Rourke
The Denver Boot is so called because when it is in use your car might as well be in Denver for all the use it is in getting you down to the Local.
The Devil falls on account of his gravity.
The Devil hath power To assume a pleasing shape. William Shakespeare
The END (and more than you wanted to know)
The Earth is like a tiny grain of sand, only much much heavier.
The Electric Chair Choice: Regular or Extra Crispy.
The Electric Chair Choice: Regular or Extra Crispy?
The English are not very spiritual people, so they invented cricket to give them some idea of eternity. George Bernard Shaw
The English have no respect for their language, and will not teach their children to speak it. | G. B. Shaw
The F1 key is the key marked F1.
The Fear of God is second to Fear of Snakes
The Fear of SNAKES out does the Fear Of G
The Fifth Rule: You have taken yourself too seriously.
The First Myth of Management -- It exists.
The First Rule of Program Optimization: Don't do it. The Second Rule of Program Optimization (for experts only): Don't do it yet. | Michael Jackson
The Freedom Line - Where are all our POW's?
The French defence isn't...
The Golden Age will come only when men have forgotten gold
The Golden Rule - He who has the gold makes the rule.
The Grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for., Allan K. Chalmers
The Grass is Brown on BOTH sides of the Fence...
The Greek philosophers began by asking fundamental questions about the nature of life, the universe, and thought itself. They soon discovered that the answers to these questions were not forthcoming, nor likely to be. But in time, they made a greater Tom Weller (Cvltvre Made Stupid, 1987)
The Heineken Uncertainty Principle: You can never be sure how many beers you had last night.
The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's history. | Vice President Dan Quayle
The Hubbell works fine; all that stuff IS blurry!
The IQ of the group is the lowest IQ of a member of the group divided by the number of people in the group.
The Ides of March have come. |  Julius Caesar
The Islamic Musical, "Seven Brides for One Brother"
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame
The Kennedy Constant: Don't get mad -- get even.
The Killer Ducks are coming
The Lab called,..... Your brain is ready!
The Law is your friend..but watch out for the Lawyers.
The Law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich, as well as the poor, to sleep under the bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread. | Anatole France
The Magic of Windows : Turns a 486 into a XT.
The Magic of Windows : it turns a 486 into a XT.
The Magic of Windows:  Turns a 486 into a XT.
The Military Salute now uses a much limper wrist.
The National Procrastinators Week will be rescheduled...
The National Short-Sleeved Shirt Association says: Support your right to bare arms
The OFFICIAL tagline of the 1996 Olympics!
The Official Offline Reader of The Lunatic Fringe!
The Original Multitasker : two PCs and a chair with wheels !
The Pace of Progress: Society is a mule, not a car...if pressed too hard, it will throw off its rider.
The Pig, if I am not mistaken, Gives us ham and pork and Bacon. Let others think his heart is big, I think it stupid of the Pig. | Ogden Nash
The Preacher, the Politicain, the Teacher, Were each of them once a kiddie. A child, indeed, is a wonderful creature.  Do I want one?  God Forbiddie | Ogden Nash
The Quark bomb, formerly the Johnny Cyclops bomb, after the President of the same name...| Whoops Apocalypse
The Ranger isn't gonna like it, Yogi.
The Roman Rule: The one who says it cannot be done should never interrupt the one who is doing it.
The Senate is a place filled with goodwill and good intentions, and if the road to hell is paved with them, then it's a pretty good detour. Hubert H. Humphrey
The Stones, I love the Stones. I watch them whenever I can. Fred, Barney... Stephen Wright
The Sun is at the center of the Universe.  | Copernicus
The Tao of Crash Test Dummies-looking for a few good zen
The Third Law of Photography: If you did manage to get any good shots, they will be ruined when someone inadvertently opens the darkroom door and all of the dark leaks out.
The Toe that can be stubbed is not the true Toe.
The Tree of Learning bears the noblest fruit, but noble fruit tastes bad.
The UART's will'na take this speed, Cap'n !
The UARTs can't take much more o' this Captain
The UARTs won't take this speed, Captain.
The ULTIMATE Law : All general statements are false.
The US has a vital interest in that area of the country. | Dan Quayle referring to Latin America.
The USS Reagan -- "To boldly ... um ... I forget..."
The United Nations is designed to make possible lasting freedom and independence for all its members. Harry S. Truman
The United Nations is our one great hope for a peaceful and free world. Ralph Bunche
The United Nations was not set up to be a reformatory. It was assumed that you would be good before you got in and not that being in would make you good. John Foster Dulles
The United States can ... be proud that it has institutions and a structure that permit its citizens to express honest dissent, even though those who do so may be maligned by the highest official in the land. New York Times
The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced. Frank Zappa
The Universe is a big place... perhaps the biggest
The Universe is but one vast symbol of God. Thomas Carlyle
The VAX was developed by DEC. Detractors assert it's a wreck. Perkin-Elmer and Prime Are still biding their time, Hoping someone will buy from them yet.
The Vatican Express Card. Don't leave Rome without it.
The Vietnamese people deeply love independence, freedom and peace. But in the face of United States aggression they have risen up, united as one man. Ho Chi Minh
The Way! The Truth! and The Life!
The White House is the finest prison in the world. Harry S. Truman
The White Rabbit put on his spectacles. 'Where shall I begin, please your Majesty?' he asked. 'Begin at the beginning,' the King said, very gravely, 'and go on till you come to the end; then stop.' Lewis Carroll (Alice in Wonderland)
The Wild Celt: Drink Guiness It is Good for You!!!!!
The World: A comedy for thinkers; a tragedy for feelers.
The Youth of a Nation are the trustees of posterity. Benjamin Disraeli
The [Ford Foundation] is a large body of money completely surrounded by people who want some. | Dwight MacDonald
The ability to ask the right question is more than half the battle of finding the answer. Thomas J. Watson
The ablest man I ever met is the man you think you are. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
The above opinion is worth 2 cents.
The absent are always in the wrong. English Proverb
The absent are like children, helpless to defend themselves. Charles Reade
The absent are never without fault. Nor the present without excuse. Benjamin Franklin
The abuse of greatness is when it disjoins remorse from power.
The acquiring of culture is the development of an avid hunger for knowledge and beauty. Jesse Bennett
The actions of men are the best interpreters of their thoughts. John Locke
The actions of your companion or close allies will help you to make an important decision.
The advantage to being a pessimist is that all your surprises are pleasant.
The adverb always follows the verb.
The advertisement is the most truthful part of a newspaper | Thomas Jefferson
The advertisement is the most truthful part of a newspaper., Thomas Jefferson
The affections are like lightning: you cannot tell where they will strike till they have fallen. Jean Baptiste Lacordaire
The agony of delete.
The agony of delete...
The amount of work done varies inversely with the time spent in the office.
The amplest knowledge has the largest faith. Ignorance is always incredulous. Robert Eldridge Willmott
The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind.| Bob Dylan
The anvil fears no blows. Romanian Proverb
The apathy of the people is enough to make every statue leap from its pedestal and hasten the resurrection of the dead. William Lloyd Garrison
The army with the smartest dress uniform will lose. Murphy's Fifth Military Law
The arrogance of age must submit to be taught by youth.
The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook. William James
The art of living is more like that of wrestling than of dancing; the main thing is to stand firm and be ready for an unseen attack. Marcus Aurelius
The art of progress is to preserve order amid change, and to preserve change amid order. Life refuses to be embalmed alive. Alfred North Whitehead
The artist who aims at perfection in everything achieves it in nothing. Delacroix
The arts are the rain forests of society. They produce the oxygen of freedom, and they are the early warning system when freedom is in danger. June Wayne
The attacker must vanquish; the defender need only survive.
The attainment of an ideal is often the beginning of a disillusion. Stanley Baldwin
The attention span of a computer is only as long as its electrical cord.
The attention span of a computer is only as long as its power cord.
The automobile has not merely taken over the street, it has dissolved the living tissue of the city ... Gas-filled, noisy and hazardous, our streets have become the most inhumane landscape in the world. James M. Fitch
The average man does not get pleasure out of an idea because he thinks it is true; he thinks it is true because he gets pleasure out of it. H. L. Mencken
The average man does not know what to do with this life, yet wants another one which will last forever. Anatole France
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains because the average man can see better than he can think.
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that carries any reward. John Maynard Keynes
The awareness that we are all human beings together has become lost in war and through politics. Albert Schweitzer
The ballot is stronger than the bullet.
The barrenest of all mortals is the sentimentalist. Thomas Carlyle
The basic test of freedom is perhaps less in what we are free to do than in what we are free not to do. Eric Hoffer
The basis of a democratic state is liberty.  | Aristotle
The basis of action is lack of imagination. It is the last resource of those who know not how to dream. Oscar Wilde
The basis of optimism is sheer terror.
The beard does not make the philosopher.
The beatings will continue until morale improves.
The beginning is the half of every action. Greek Proverb
The beginning of wisdom is to call things by their right names. Chinese Proverb
The believer is happy; the doubter is wise. Hungarian Proverb
The benefits of education and of useful knowledge, generally diffused through a community, are essential to the preservation of a free government. Sam Houston
The best adventurer is not frightened to try something new.
The best alternative to INTELLIGENCE is SILENCE.
The best argument I know for an immortal life is the existence of a man who deserves one. William James
The best armor is to keep out of range.
The best armor is to keep out of range. Italian Proverb
The best blood at times gets into fools and mosquitoes.
The best blood will at some time get into a fool or a mosquito. Austin O'Malley
The best book on programming for the layman is "Alice in Wonderland"; but that's because it's the best book on anything for the layman.
The best cure for insomnia is to get a  lot of sleep. | W. C. Fields
The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.
The best defense against logic is ignorance.
The best defense against logic is stupidity.
The best defense is a good offense.
The best defense is to stay out of range.
The best doctor is the one you run for and can't find.
The best education in the world is that got by struggling to get a living. Wendell Phillips
The best executive is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what he wants done, and self-restraint enough to keep from meddling with them while they do it. Theodore Roosevelt
The best fish swim near the bottom.
The best is the cheapest. Benjamin Franklin
The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry Proverb
The best laid schemes o' mice and men gang aft a-glay.
The best manner of avenging ourselves is by not resembling him who has injured us. Jane Porter
The best mirror is an old friend.
The best of all the preachers are the men who live their creeds. Edgar A. Guest
The best of us being unfit to die, what an unexpressible absurdity to put the worst to death. Nathaniel Hawthorne
The best portion of a good man's life is his little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and of love. William Wordsworth
The best prophet of the future is the past.
The best reason I can think of for not running for president of the United States is that you have to shave twice a day. Adlai Stevenson
The best security against revolution is in constant correction of abuses and the introduction of needed improvements. It is the neglect of timely repair that makes rebuilding necessary. Richard Whately
The best substitute for experience is being sixteen.
The best system is to have one party govern and the other party watch. Thomas B. Reed
The best theology is rather a divine life than a divine knowledge. Jeremy Taylor
The best thing about growing older is that it takes such a long time.
The best thing about the future is that it comes only one day at a time. Abraham Lincoln
The best thing to hold onto in this world is each other.
The best things in life are for a fee.
The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust. Josh Billings
The best time to buy anything is last year.
The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does. Anonymous
The best use of life is to spend it for something that outlasts life. William James
The best vacations are spent near the budget.
The best way out is always through. Robert Frost
The best way out of a difficulty is through it.
The best way to accelerate Windows is at escape velocity.
The best way to accelerate a Mac : 9.81 m/s^2
The best way to accelerate a Mac is at -9.8 m/s
The best way to accelerate a Mac is at 9.8 m/s^2
The best way to chear yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up. Mark Twain
The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his own way. Josh Billings
The best way to get a bad law repealed is to enforce it strictly. Abraham Lincoln
The best way to have a good idea is to have a lot of ideas.
The best way to have a good idea is to have lots of ideas. Linus Pauling
The best way to keep friends is not to give them away.
The best way to keep good acts in memory is to refresh them with new. Cato
The best way to keep one's word is not to give it. Napoleon Bonaparte
The best way to keep your children home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant - and let the air out of the tires. Dorothy Parker
The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.
The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away. Wilson Mizner
The best way to know God is to love many things. Vincent van Gogh
The best way to procure insults is to submit to them. William Hazlitt
The best way to save face is to keep the lower part shut.
The best way to stop smoking is to carry wet matches. Anon.
The best way to turn a woman's head is to tell her she has a beautiful profile. Sacha Guitry
The best way to win an argument is to be right.
The better part of valor is discretion.
The big thieves hang the little ones. Czech Proverb
The bigger the theory, the better.
The bigger thet are the harder they fall Proverb
The bigger they are, the harder they hit.
The biggest critics of my books are people who never read them. Jackie Collins, best selling author, 1995
The biggest difference between time and space is that you can't reuse time. | Merrick Furst
The bird of war is not the eagle but the stork.
The bird that can sing and won't sing must be made to sing.
The birds are singing, the flowers are budding, and it is time for Miss Manners to tell young lovers to stop necking in public.
The block of granite which is an obstacle in the pathway of the weak, becomes a stepping-stone in the pathway of the strong. Thomas Carlyle
The block of granite which was an obstacle in the pathway of the weak becomes a stepping-stone in the pathway of the strong. Thomas Carlyle
The blood of the martyrs is the seed of the church. Tertullian
The blood of the soldier makes the glory of the general.
The body is the shell of the soul, and dress the husk of that shell; but the husk often tells what the kernel is. Anonymous
The body of a sensualist is the coffin of a dead soul. Christian Nestell Bovee
The bonds of matrimony are like any other bondsthey mature slowly. Peter De Vries
The books that everybody admires are those nobody reads. Anatole France
The books that help you the most are those which make you think the most. Theodore Parker
The bosom can ache beneath diamond brooches; and many a blithe heart dances under coarse wool. Edwin Hubbel Chapin
The boss is always right.
The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up and does not stop until you get into the office. Robert Frost
The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get to school.
The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up, and doesn't stop until you get to work.
The brain works from the moment of birth until you stand up to speak in public.
The brave man is known only in war; the wise man in anger; the friend in time of need.
The buck doesn't even slow down here!
The buck doesn't even slow down here.
The buck stops at the desk over there.
The buck stops here. Harry S Truman
The bugs will go away when you turn off the computer !
The busiest of living agents are certain dead men's thoughts. Christian Nestell Bovee
The business that considers itself immune to the necessity for advertising sooner or later finds itself immune to business. Derby Brown
The cart has no place where a fifth wheel could be used.
The case has been going on for so long that I've forgotten whether I'm really innocent or guilty. Ashleigh Brilliant
The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it. Doug Larson
The cat in gloves catches no mice. Benjamin Franklin
The cause of problems are solutions!
The cautious seldom err.
The chains of habit are too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken. Samuel Johnson
The chance of forgetting something is directly proportional to ..... to ........ uh ..............|Hurewitz's Memory Principle
The chance of the bread falling with the butter side down is directly proportional to the value of the carpet. Jennings' Corollary to the Law of Selective Gravity
The characters in this message are recyclable.
The charity that hastens to proclaim its good deeds, ceases to be charity, and is only pride and ostentation. William Hutton
The cheerful loser is the winner. Elbert Hubbard
The chicken that clucks the loudest is the one most likely to show up at the steam fitters' picnic.
The chief cause of divorce is matrimony.
The chief cause of problems is solutions.
The chief trouble with jazz is that there is not enough of it; some of it we have to listen to twice. Don Herold
The chief value of money lies in the fact that one lives in a world in which it is overestimated. H. L. Mencken
The child had every toy his father ever wanted.
The child was diseased at birth, stricken with a hereditary ill that only the most vital men are able to shake off. I mean povertythe most deadly and prevalent of all diseases. Eugene O'Neill
The chip's canna' take much more o'this, Captain !
The church is always trying to get other people to reform; it might not be a bad idea to reform itself. Mark Twain
The church is near, but the way is icy, The tavern is far, but I will walk carefully. Ukranian Proverb
The church must be reminded that it is not the master or the servant of the state, but rather the conscience of the state. Martin Luther King, Jr.
The cinema is not a slice of life but a piece of cake.
The city is not a concrete jungle.  It is a human zoo.
The clearest way to show what the rule of law means to us in everyday life is to recall what has happened when there is no rule of law., from an address on the first observance of Law Day, 5/5/58 Dwight D. Eisenhower
The clearsighted do not rule the world, but they sustain and console it. Agnes Repplier
The closed door and the sealed lips are prerequisites to tyranny. Frank L. Stanton
The closed mind, if closed long enough, can be opened by nothing short of dynamite. Gerald W. Johnson
The coast was clear.
The commonest form, one of the most often neglected, and the safest opportunity for the average man to seize, is hard work. Arthur Brisbane
The company of just and righteous men is best. |  Euripides
The computing field is always in need of new cliches. | Alan Perlis
The constitution, on this hypothesis, is a mere thing of wax in the hands of the Judiciary, which they may twist and shape into any form they please. Thomas Jefferson
The consumer is not a moron, it is your spouse.
The cost of feathers has risen.  Now even down is up.
The cost of feathers has risen... Now even DOWN is up!
The cost of feathers has risen.... now even down is up
The cost of feathers is higher, that makes down up.
The cost of freedom is always high, but Americans have always paid it. And one path we shall never choose, and that is the path of surrender, or submission. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
The cost of liberty is less than the price of oppression.
The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity.
The cost of living is going up, and the chance of living is going down.
The cost of memory chips went up. I forget how much.
The country's honor must be upheld at home and abroad. Theodore Roosevelt
The course of true anything does not run smooth. Samuel Butler
The course of true anything never does run smooth.
The covers of this book are too far apart. Ambrose Bierce
The covetous man pines in plenty, like Tantalus up to the chin in water, and yet thirsty. Thomas Adams
The cow is a machine which makes grass fit for us people to eat.
The cow is nothing but a machine with makes grass fit for us people to eat. | John McNulty
The cream rises to the top.  So does the scum...
The creation of a thousand forests is in one acorn. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The creation of a thousand forests is in one acorn.| Ralph Waldo Emerson
The crisis of today is the joke of tomorrow.
The crowning fortune of a man is to be born to some pursuit which finds him employment and happiness, whether it be to make baskets, or broadswords, or canals, or statues, or songs. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity., Ellen Parr
The cure for love at first sight is to take another look.
The cure may be worse than the disease.
The current death rate?  One per person, of course.
The curse of man, and the cause of nearly all his woe, is his stupendous capacity for believing the incredible. H. L. Mencken
The custom and fashion of today will be the awkwardness and outrage of tomorrowso arbitrary are these transient laws. Alexander Dumas
The cynic is one who never sees a good quality in a man, and never fails to see a bad one. He is the human owl, vigilant in darkness and blind to light, mousing for vermin, and never seeing noble game. Henry Ward Beecher
The dance is a poem of which each movement is a word. Mata Hari
The day divides the nights. Nightime devours the day.
The day-to-day travails of the IBM programmer are so amusing to most of us who are fortunate enough never to have been one -- like watching Charlie Chaplin trying to cook a shoe.
The days just before marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book.
The days just prior to marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book.
The days of the digital watch are numbered
The days of the digital watch are numbered.
The dead outnumber the living more than 30 to 1.
The debate rages on: Is PL/I Bachtrian or Dromedary?
The decision doesn't have to be logical, it was unanimous.
The decline of literature indicates the decline of a nation. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
The deeper the sorrow, the less tongue hath it.
The defects of the mind, like those of the face, grow worse as we grow old. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
The dentist never talks to his patients until the drill is in their mouths.
The dentist said my wisdom teeth were retarded.
The descent to Hades is the same from every place.
The desolation of winter; passing through a small hamlet, a dog barks. Shiki
The destroyer of weeds, thistles, and thorns is a benefactor whether he soweth grain or not. Robert Green Ingersoll
The devil can cite Scripture for his purpose.
The devil finds work for idle circuits to do.
The devil finds work for idle glands.
The devil lies brooding in the miser's chest. Thomas Fuller
The dictionary is the only place that success comes before work. Anonymous
The die is cast.
The die is cast.  |  (proverb quoted by Julius Caesar).
The difference between a man and his valet: they both smoke the same cigars, but only one pays for them. Robert Frost
The difference between a moral man and a man of honor is that the latter regrets a discreditable act even when it has worked. H. L. Mencken
The difference between a violin and a viola is that a viola burns longer. Victor Borge
The difference between coarse and refined abuse is the difference between being bruised by a club and wounded by a poisoned arrow. Samuel Johnson
The difference between ideas and results is a good manager.
The difference between meat and fish is that if you beat your fish it dies.
The difference between perseverance and obstinacy is, that one often comes from a strong will, and the other from a strong won't. Henry Ward Beecher
The difference between science and the fuzzy subjects is that science requires reasoning while those other subjects merely require scholarship. | Robert Heinlein
The difference between the right word and almost the right word is the difference between lighning and the lightning bug. Mark Twain
The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug. Mark Twain
The difference between what the most and the least learned people know is inexpressibly trivial in relation to that which is unknown. Albert Einstein
The difference is no less real because it is of degree. Benjamin Nathan Cardozo
The difference of race is one of the reasons why I fear war may always exist; because race implies difference, difference implies superiority, and superiority leads to predominance. Benjamin Disraeli
The difficult we do immediately. Impossible takes longer.
The difficult we do today; the impossible takes a little longer.
The difficulty with marriage is that we fall in love with a personality, but must live with a character. Peter DeVries
The dimmer the light, the greater the scandal.
The discontented man finds no easy chair. Benjamin Franklin
The disease of mutual distrust among nations is the bane of modern civilization. Franz Boas
The diseases of the present have little in common with the diseases of the past save that we die of them. Agnes Repplier
The disks are getting full; purge a file today.
The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. Latin Proverb
The dog ate my .REP packet.
The dog wags his tail, not for you, but for your bread. Portuguese Proverb
The dog's kennel is not the place to keep a sausage. Danish Proverb
The door is the key.
The dread of something after death, The undiscovered country, from whose bourn No traveler returns, puzzles the will, And makes us rather bear those ills we have, Than fly to others that we know not of. -William Shakespeare, from Hamlet
The dreadful burden of having nothing to do.
The drunker I sit here, The longer I get.
The early bird catches the worm Proverb
The early bird gets the early worm.
The early bird suffers from insomnia.
The early worm gets the bird.
The early worm has a death wish.
The earth and its resources belong of right to its people. Gifford Pinchot
The earth is given as a common for men to labor and live in. Thomas Jefferson
The earth is like a tiny grain of sand, only heavier.
The earth is like a tiny grain of sand, only much, much heavier.
The earth is the Lord's fullness thereof: this is no longer a hollow dictum of religion, but a directive for economic action toward human brotherhood. Lewis Mumford
The earth was made so various, that the mind of desultory man, studious of change, and pleased with novelty, might be indulged. William Cowper
The earth, that is sufficient, I do not want the constellations any nearer, I know they are very well where they are, I know they suffice for those who belong to them. Walt Whitman
The easiest kind of relationship for me is with ten thousand people. The hardest is with one. Joan Baez
The easy way is always the hardest way.
The economic and technological triumphs of the past few years have not solved as many problems as we thought they would, and, in fact, have brought us new problems we did not foresee. Henry Ford II
The educated differ from the uneducated as much as the living from the dead. Aristotle
The education of the will is the object of our existence. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The effect of power and publicity on all men is the aggravation of self, a sort of tumor that ends by killing the victim's sympathies. Henry Brooks Adams
The effects of our actions may be postponed but they are never lost. There is an inevitable reward for good deeds and an inescapable punishment for bad. Meditate upon this truth, and seek always to earn good wages from Destiny. Wu Ming Fu
The end is near--but wait for the sequel!
The end is near... but wait for the sequel
The end of culture is right living. W. Somerset Maugham
The end of labor is to gain leisure.
The end of labor is to gain leisure. Aristotle
The end of the world will occur at 3:00 p.m., this Friday, with symposium to follow.
The end of wisdom is to dream high enough to lose the dream in the seeking of it. William Faulkner
The essence of knowledge is, having it, to apply it; not having it, to confess your ignorance. Confucius
The essence of war is violence. Moderation in war is imbecility. John A. Fisher
The evening of a well spent life brings its lamps with it. Joseph Joubert
The eventual supremacy of reason should be accepted.
The evidence before the court is incontrovertible...
The existence of any pure race with special endowments is a myth, as is the belief that there are races all of whose members are foredoomed to eternal inferiority. Franz Boas
The expectations of life depend upon diligence; the mechanic that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools. Confucius
The eye of the master will do more work than both his hands. Benjamin Franklin
The eye sees only what the mind is prepared to comprehend., Henri Bergson
The fact that God has prohibited despair gives misfortune the right to hope all things, and leaves hope free to dare all things. Anne Sophie Swetchine
The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of a remarkable Christian forbearance among men. Ambrose Bierce
The fact that it works is immaterial. | L. Ogborn
The fame of great men ought to be judged always by the means they used to acquire it. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
The family is one of nature's masterpieces. George Santayana
The family you come from isn't as important as the family you're going to have. Ring Lardner
The famous politician was trying to save both his faces.
The farther back you can look, the farther forward you are likely to see. Winston Churchill
The fashion wears out more apparel than the man.
The fate of nations is intimately bound up with their powers of reproduction. All nations and all empires first felt decadence gnawing at them when their birth rate fell off. Benito Mussolini
The fear of life is the favorite disease of the twentieth century. William Lyon Phelps
The feature which you claim to have discovered in Unix is almost certainly due to an act of God: why don't you read the documentation?
The feature which you claim to have discovered in Unix is almost certainly due to sheer incompetence: go away
The feeling of mistrust is always the last which a great mind acquires. Jean Baptiste Racine
The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is getting ready to skin you. Kin Hubbard
The fellow who thinks he knows it all is especially annoying to those of us who do. Harold Coffin
The few men who have managed to reach heaven must be terribly spoiled by this time. Ed Howe
The few, the proud, the Windows 3.0 & SX owners.
The fewer our wants, the nearer we resemble the gods. Socrates
The fewer the facts, the stronger the opinion.
The fewer the words, the better the prayer. Martin Luther
The fewer words the better prayer. Martin Luther
The field of consciousness is tiny. It accepts only one problem at a time. Get into a fist fight, put your mind on the strategy of the fight, and you will not feel the other fellow's punches. Antoine de Saint-Exupery
The final test of a leader is that he leaves behind him in other men the conviction and the will to carry on. Walter Lippmann
The finest eloquence is that which gets things done.
The finest words in the world are only vain sounds, if you cannot comprehend them. Anatole France
The fire of glory is the torch of the mind. Anonymous
The first Myth of Management : it exists.
The first and simplest emotion which we discover in the human mind, is curiosity. Edmund Burke
The first and worst of all frauds is to cheat one's self.
The first and worst of all frauds is to cheat oneself. Gamaliel Bailey
The first blonde is the cheapest.
The first day, a guest; the second, a burden; the third, a pest. Edouard R. Laboulaye
The first drink with water, the second without water, the third like water. Spanish Proverb
The first duty of a lecturer: to hand you after an hour's discourse a nugget of pure truth to wrap up between the pages of your notebooks, and keep on the mantlepiece forever. Virginia Woolfe
The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with i
The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it. | Abbie Hoffman
The first half of life consists of the capacity to enjoy without the chance; the last half consists of the chance without the capacity. Mark Twain
The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children. Clarence Darrow
The first human being who hurled an insult instead of a stone was the founder of civilization. Sigmund Freud
The first loss is the easiest.
The first man who compared a woman to a flower was a poet, the second an imbecile.
The first myth of management is that it exists.
The first of all other virtuesfor other people. Oliver Wendell Holmes
The first pull on the cord ALWAYS sends the drapes in the wrong direction. Boyle's Other Law
The first requisite for immortality is death. Stanislaw J. Lec
The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts.
The first step binds one to the second - French Proverb
The first step towards philosophy is incredulity.
The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.
The first two days of vacation are endless, then it flies.
The fish in the sea are as good as the fish removed.
The fish that escaped is the big one.
The floggings will continue until morale improves.
The flood has arrived, may we interest you in an ark ?
The flush toilet is the basis of Western civilization.
The following statement is not true:
The fool that eats till he is sick must fast till he is well. George W. Thornbury
The fool wanders; the wise man travels.
The fool who is silent can pass for wise.
The fool who persists in his folly will become wise. William Blake
The foolish and the dead alone never change their opinions. James Russell Lowell
The foolish and wicked practice of profane cursing and swearing is a vice so mean and low that every person of sense and character detests and despises it. George Washington
The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet. James Oppenheim
The footprint of the owner is the best manure.
The fortune program is supported, in part, by user contributions and by a major grant from the National Endowment for the Inanities.
The fragrance always stays in the hand that gives the rose. Hada Bejar
The free press is the mother of all our liberties and of our progress under liberty. Adlai E. Stevenson
The free world must now prove itself worthy of its own past. Dwight D. Eisenhower
The freedom now desired by many is not freedom to do and dare but freedom from care and worry. James Truslow Adams
The freedom of poetic license.  | Cicero (43 BC)
The freedom of the press works in such a way that there is not much freedom from it. Princess Grace (Grace Kelly) of Monaco
The fruit derived from labor is the sweetest of all pleasures. Luc de Clapiers
The further I go, the behinder I get.
The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.| Eleanor Roosevelt
The future can be anything we want it to be, providing we have the faith and that we realize that peace, no less than war, required 'blood and sweat and tears.' Charles F. Kettering
The future is a myth created by insurance salesmen and high school counselors.
The future is bright in affairs of the heart.
The future is like the present, only longer.
The future is not what it used to be.
The future is not what it used to be. (It never was.)
The future is purchased by the present. Samuel Johnson
The future is when you'll wish you'd done what you aren't doing now.
The future isn't what it used to be.
The future lies ahead.
The future of this republic is in the hands of the American voter. Dwight D. Eisenhower
The future's so bright, I gotta wear shades!
The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling. Ambrose Bierce
The game's a little bit wide open again.
The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials. Chinese Proverb
The gene pool has no lifeguard.
The general root of superstition is that men observe when things hit, and not when they miss, and commit to memory the one, and pass over the other. Francis Bacon
The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance.
The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn't been asleep.
The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn't been asleep. Wilson Mizner
The gentlemen looked one another over with microscopic carelessness.
The geographical center of Boston is in Roxbury.  Due north of the center we find the South End.  This is not to be confused with South Boston which lies directly east from the South End.  North of the South End is East Boston and southwest of East Boston is the North End.
The ghost of things to be avoided.
The giving hand ... receives
The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone else believes in him and is willing to trust him. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The glory of the nation rests in the character of her men. And character comes from boyhood. Thus every boy is a challenge to his elders. Herbert Hoover
The goal of Computer Science is to build something that will last at least until we've finished building it.
The goal of science is to build better mousetraps. The goal of nature is to build better mice.
The goal of science is to build better mousetraps. The goal of nature is to build better mice. Anonymous
The god of victory is said to be one-handed, but peace gives victory on both sides. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The gods conceal from men the happiness of death, that they may endure life. Lucan
The gods gave man fire and he invented fire engines.  They gave him love and he invented marriage.
The golden years suck
The good and the wise lead quiet lives. Euripides
The good ended happily and the bad ended unhappily. That is what fiction means. Oscar Wilde, from The Importance of Being Earnest
The good have no need of an advocate. | Phocion (317 BC)
The good lord willing and the board don't crash.
The good man is the man who, no matter how morally unworthy he has been, is moving to become better. John Dewey
The good news is that the bad news was wrong...
The good things of prosperity are to be wished; but the good things that belong to adversity are to be admired. Seneca
The goose lays the golden egg. Payrolls make consumers. George Humphrey
The government is us; we are the government, you and I. Theodore Roosevelt
The grand aim of all science is to cover the greatest number of empirical facts by logical deduction from the smallest number of hypotheses or axioms., from Life Magazine, 1/9/50 Albert Einstein
The grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, something to love, and something to hope for. Allan K. Chalmers
The grand leap of the whale up the Fall of Niagra is esteemed, by all who have seen it, as one of the finast spectacles in nature. -- B. Franklin.
The grass is always greener on the other side Proverb
The grass is always greener on the other side of your sunglasses.
The gratification of wealth is not found in mere possession or in lavish expenditure, but in its wise application. Miguel de Cervantes
The grave is still the best shelter against the storms of destiny. G. C. Lichtenberg
The graveyards are full of indispensable men.
The great enemy of the truth is very often not the liediliberate, contrived, and dishonestbut the mythpersistent, persuasive, and unrealistic. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
The great man is he who does not lose his child's-heart.
The great masses of the people ... will more easily fall victims to a great lie than to a small one. Adolf Hitl
The great orator always shows a dash of contempt for the opinions of his audience. Elbert Hubbard
The greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not our circumstances. Martha Washington
The greater the feeling of inferiority that has been experienced, the more powerful is the urge to conquest and the more violent the emotional agitation. Alfred Adler
The greater the ignorance the greater the dogmatism.
The greatest Glory of a free-born People, Is to transmit that Freedom to their Children. William Havard
The greatest ability is dependability.
The greatest conquerer is he who overcomes the enemy without a blow. Chinese Proverb
The greatest cunning is to have none at all.
The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well-meaning, but without understanding. Louis D. Brandeis
The greatest difficulties lie where we are not looking for them. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
The greatest firmness is the greatest mercy. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
The greatest friend of truth is Time, her greatest enemy is Prejudice, and her constant companion is Humility. Charles Caleb Colton
The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own. Benjamin Disraeli
The greatest griefs are those we cause ourselves.
The greatest hate springs from the greatest love.
The greatest homage we can pay to truth, is to use it. James Russell Lowell
The greatest incitement to guilt is the hope of sinning with impunity. Cicero
The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes. Sir Winston Churchill
The greatest loss of time is delay and expectation. I never yet talked to the man who wanted to save time who could tell me what he was going to do with the time he saved. Will Rogers
The greatest man in history was the poorest.
The greatest man in history was the poorest. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The greatest of all faults is to be conscious of none. Thomas Carlyle
The greatest of all gifts is the power to estimate things at their true worth. La Rochefoucauld
The greatest of all inventors: Accident!!
The greatest of faults is to be conscious of none.
The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people said couldn't be done.
The greatest remedy for anger is delay.
The greatest thing in family life is to take a hint when a hint is intendedand not to take a kint when a hint isn't intended. Robert Frost
The greatest threat towards future is indifference. Anonymous
The greatest truths are the simplest. A.W. Hare
The greatest weariness comes from work not done. Eric Hoffer
The greatness of a nation can be judged by the way its animals are treated. Gandhi
The greed of gain has no time or limit to its capaciousness. Its one object is to produce and consume. It has pity neither for beautiful nature nor for living human beings. It is ruthlessly ready without a moment's hesitation to crush beauty and life Rabindranath Tagore
The green earth sends her incense up. From many a mountain shrine; From folded leaf and dewey cup She pours her sacred wine. John Greenleaf Whittier
The grim fact is that we prepare for war like precocious giants, and for peace like retarded pygmies. Lester Bowles Pearson
The guilty is he who meditates a crime; the punishment is his who lays the plot. Conte Vittorio Alfieri
The guy sure looks like plant food to me
The habit of looking on the bright side of every event is worth more than a thousand pounds a year. Samuel Johnson
The hair is the richest ornament of women. Martin Luther
The hammer shatters glass but forges steel. Russian Proverb
The hand that kindles cannot quench the flame.
The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world. W. S. Ross
The hangman let us down.
The happiest business in all the world is that of making friends, And no investment on the street pays larger dividends, For life is more than stocks and bonds, and love than rate percent, And he who gives in friendship's name shall reap what he has spent. Anonymous
The happiest miser on earth is the man who saves up every friend he can make. Robert Emmet Sherwood
The happiest moments of my life have been the few which I have past at home in the bosom of my family.... public employment contributes neither to advantage nor happiness. It is but honorable exile from one's family and affairs. Thomas Jefferson
The happiness and misery of men depend no less on temper than fortune. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
The happy Union of these States is a wonder; their Constitution a miracle; their example the hope of Liberty throughout the world. James Madison
The hard disk you save may be your own.
The harder you work the luckier you get.
The harder you work, the harder it is to surrender. Vince Lombardi
The hardest thing about time travel is the grammar.
The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.| Albert Einstein
The hardest thing is to disguise your feelings when you put a lot of relatives on the train for home.
The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff. Ambrose Bierce
The head learns new things, but the heart forever more practices old experiences. Henry Ward Beecher
The hearing ear is always found close to the speaking tongue, a custom whereof the memory of man runneth not howsomever to the contrary, nohow.
The heart has eyes which the brain knows nothing of. Charles H. Perkhurst
The heart has reasons that reason does not understand. Jacques Bnigne Bossuel
The heart is forever making the head its fool. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
The heart is wiser than the intellect.
The heart is wiser than the intellect...
The heart of a fool is in his mouth, but the mouth of the wise man is in his heart. Benjamin Franklin
The heart seldom feels what the mouth expresses. Jean Galoert de Campistron
The heart that loves is always young. Greek Proverb
The hell with the prime directive, let's kill something.
The herd instinct among economists makes sheep look like independent thinkers.
The heresy of one age becomes the orthodoxy of the next. Helen Keller
The hermit doesn't sleep at night, in love with the blue of the vacant moon. The cool of the breeze that rustles the trees rustles him too. Ching-An
The hidden flaw never remains hidden.
The high cost of living hasn't affected its popularity. Anonymous
The high wage begins down in the shop. If it is not created there it cannot get into pay envelopes. There will never be a system invented which will do away with the necessity for work. Henry Ford
The higher the ape climbs the more he shows his bald haunches.
The highest bidder catches the most politicians.
The highest form of vanity is love of fame. George Santayana
The highest law gives a thing to him who can use it. Henry David Thoreau
The highest reward for a person's toil is not what they get for it, but what they become by it.| John Ruskin
The highest use of capital is not to make more money, but to make money do more for the betterment of life. Henry Ford
The hills were worn down by eroticism
The history of every country begins in the heart of a man or woman. Willa Cather
The history of the world is full of men who rose to leadership, by sheer force of self-confidence, bravery and tenacity. Mahatma Gandhi
The hole and the patch should be commensurate.
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money.
The honeymoon is that short period of doting between dating and debting.
The hostage? Yes, we're trying to get a phone fitted.
The human animal differs from the lesser primates in his passion for lists of "Ten Best". | H. Allen Smith
The human body is a magazine of inventions, the patent office, where are the models from which every hint is taken. All the tools and engines on earth are only extensions of its limbs and senses. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The human mind ordinarily operates at only ten percent of its capacity -- the rest is overhead for the operating system.
The human mind treats a new idea the way the body treats a strange protein -- it rejects it. |  P. Medawar
The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.
The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter. | Mark Twain
The human race has only one effective weapon, and that is laughter.
The human race is still in beta test...
The human race is still in eta test.
The human species, according to the best theory I can form of it, is composed of two distinct races: the men who borrow, and the men who lend. Charles Lamb
The human voice is the organ of the soul. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
The humblest individual exerts some influence, either for good or evil, upon others. Henry Ward Beecher
The hungry world cannot be fed until and unless the growth of its resources and the growth of its population come into balance. Each man and womanand each nationmust make decisions of conscience and policy in the face of this great problem. Lyndon Baines Johnson
The hurrieder I go, the behinder I get....
The hurrier I go, the behinder I get.
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. Groucho Marx
The ideas I stand for are not mine. I borrowed them from Socrates. I swiped them from Chesterfield. I stole them from Jesus. And I put them in a book. If you don't like their rules, whose would you use? Dale Carnegie
The idle mind knows not what it is it wants.
The ignorant man marvels at the exceptional; the wise man marvels at the common; the greatest wonder of all is the regularity of nature. George Dana Boardman
The immature man wants to die nobly for a cause, while the mature man wants to live humanely for one. Wilhelm Stekel
The immoratal words of Socrates -- "I drank what?"
The important thing is not to stop questioning.
The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. Albert Einstein
The improvement of our way of life is more important than the spreading of it. If we make it satisfactory enough, it will spread automatically. If we do not, no strength of arms can permanently oppose it. Charles A. Lindbergh
The improvement of understanding is for two ends: first, our own increase of knowledge; secondly, to enable us to deliver that knowledge to others. John Locke
The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than gold has. Will Rogers
The individual choice of garnishment of a burger can be an important point to the consumer in this day when individualism is an increasingly important thing to people. | Donald N. Smith, president of Burger King
The infinitely little have a pride infinitely great. Voltaire
The information in this cookie is subject to change without notice an should not be construed as a commitment by Digital Equipment Corporation.
The inifinite is in the finite of every instant. Zen Saying
The injury we do and the one we suffer are not weighed in the same scale. Aesop
The ink with which all history is written is merely fluid prejudice.
The innocence that feels no risk and is taught no caution, is more vulnerable than guilt, and oftener assailed. Nathaniel P. Willis
The inspiration of the Bible depends upon the ignorance of the gentleman who reads it. Robert Green Ingersoll
The intelligent man finds almost everything ridiculous, the sensible man almost nothing. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
The interesting and inspiring thing about America is that she asks nothing for herself except what she has a right to ask for humanity itself. Woodrow Wilson
The interesting thing about a waltzing bear is not how well it dances.
The internet treats censorship as a malfunction and routes around it. John Perry Barlow
The invisible thing called a Good Name is made up of the breath of numbers that speak well of you. Lord Halifax
The irony of life is that no one gets out alive
The irony of life is that no one gets out alive...
The jest loses its point when he who makes it is the first to laugh. Johann von Schiller
The job of the poet is to render the worldto see it and report it without loss, without perversion. No poet ever talks about feelings. Only sentimental people do. Mark Van Doren
The journey is the reward. Chinese Proverb
The joys of parents are secret, and so are their griefs and fears. Francis Bacon
The judge asked, 'What do you plead?' I said, 'Insanity, your honour, who in their right mind would park in the passing lane?' Stephen Wright
The keener the want the lustier the growth. Wendell Phillips
The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.|Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy
The knack of flying, is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.| Hitch Hiker's guide
The labor movement's basic purpose is to achieve a better life for its members. A union that fails in this purpose has failed utterly. New York Times
The ladder of success is easier to climb when laid flat.
The ladies men admire, I've heard, Would shudder at a wicked word. Their candle gives a single light; They'd rather stay at home at night. They do not keep awake till three, Nor read erotic poetry. They never sanction the impure, Nor recognize an overture. They shrink from powders and from paints ... So far, I've had no complaints. | Dorothy Parker
The large print giveth and the small print taketh away.
The last person who said that, God rest his soul, lived to regret it.
The last thing England want to do now is let a goal in.
The last vestiges of the old Republic have been swept away.
The law is not a 'light' for you or any man to see by; the law is not an instrument of any kind. The law is a causeway upon which so long as he keeps to it a citizen may walk safely. Robert Bolt
The leading cause of statistics is smoking.
The least experienced fisherman always catches the biggest fish.
The least movement is of importance to all nature. The entire ocean is affected by a pebble. Blaise Pascal
The least of things with a meaning is worth more in life than the greatest of things without it. Anon.
The leaves of memory seemed to make A mournful rustling in the dark. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
The leopard cannot change its spots Proverb
The less America looks abroad, the grander its promise. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The less a statesman amounts to, the more he loves the flag.
The less influence you have, the longer you wait.
The less we know the more we suspect. Josh Billings
The less you have to do, the less time you find to do it in.
The less you say, the less you have to take back.
The liar's punishment is not in the least that he is not believed, but that he cannot believe anyone else. George Bernard Shaw
The liberty of the press is a blessing when we are inclined to write against others, and a calamity when we find ourselves overborne by the multitude of our assailants. Samuel Johnson
The life of every man is a diary in which he means to write one story, and writes another. James Matthew Barrie
The life which is unexamined is not worth living.
The light at the end of the tunnel could be a flame thrower!
The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlight of an approaching train.
The light at the end of the tunnel is usually a 'No Exit' sign. Anonymous
The light of a hundred stars does not equal the light of the moon.
The limits of the possible can only be defined by going beyond them into the impossible. Clarke's Second Law
The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep. | Woody Allen
The little engineer that could
The living world is a continuum in each and every aspect.
The longer I am out of office, the more infallible I appear to myself. | Henry Kissinger
The longer I live, the more convincing proofs I see of this truth, that God governs in the affairs of man; and if a sparrow cannot fall to the ground without his notice, is it probable that an empire can rise without his aid? Benjamin Franklin
The longer a man is wrong, the surer he is that he's right.
The longer the letter, the less chance of its being read.
The longer the title, the less important the job.
The longer you keep your temper the better it will get.
The longer you wait in line, the greater the likelihood that you are in the wrong line. The Queue Principal
The longest list has a final item.
The longest part of the journey is said to be the passing of the gate.
The loss of life will be irreplaceable. | Vice President Dan Quayle
The louder he talked of his honor, the faster we counted our spoons. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The love of justice in most men is only the fear of themselves suffering by injustice. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
The love of liberty is the love of others; the love of power is the love of ourselves. William Hazlitt
The loveliest of faces are to be seen by moonlight, when one sees half with the eye and half with the fancy. Persian Proverb
The luck that is ordained for you will be coveted by others.
The lust of fame is the last that a wise man shakes off. Tacitus
The lustre of diamonds is invigorated by the interposition of darker bodies; the lights of a picture are created by the shades; the highest pleasure which nature has indulged to sensitive perception is that of rest after fatigue. Samuel Johnson
The machine unmakes the man. Now that the machine is so perfect, the engineer is nobody. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The magic of Windoze: Turning your 486 into an XT.
The mailman bringeth.. The trashmen taketh away!
The main dangers in this life are the people who want to change everything...or nothing. Lady Nancy Astor
The main goal of the future is to stop violence. The world is addicted to it. Bill Cosby, actor, author and commedian, 1992
The main ingredient of stardom is the rest of the team. John Wooden
The main object of religion is not to get a man into heaven, but to get heaven into him. Thomas Hardy
The main thing about being a hero is to know when to die. Will Rogers
The majority isn't silent- the government is deaf
The majority isn't silent--the government is deaf!
The man that blushes is not quite a brute. Edward Young
The man who ain't got an enemy is really poor. Josh Billings
The man who can make hard things easy is the educator. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The man who does not learn is dark, like one walking in the night. Chinese Proverb
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who can't read them. Mark Twain
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who can't read them.| Mark Twain
The man who follows the crowd will usually get no further than the crowd.  The man who walks alone is likely to find himself in places no one has ever been. | Alan Ashley-Pitt
The man who gets the most satisfactory results is not always the man with the most brilliant single mind, but rather the man who can best coordinate the brains and talents of his associates. W. Alton Jones
The man who goes out alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready. Henry David Thoreau
The man who has accomplished all that he thinks worthwhile has begun to die.
The man who has never been flogged has never been taught.
The man who invented the eraser had the human race pretty well sized up.
The man who is always talking about being a gentleman, never is one. Robert S. Surtees
The man who is always worrying whether or not his soul would be damned generally has a soul that isn't worth a damn. Oliver Wendell Holmes
The man who lives by himself and for himself is likely to be corrupted by the company he keeps. Charles H. Parkhurst
The man who lives only by hope will die with despair. Italian Proverb
The man who makes no mistakes does not usually make anything.
The man who makes no mistakes does not usually make anything. Edward Phelps
The man who never alters his opinions is like standing water, and breeds reptiles of the mind. William Blake
The man who raises a fist has run out of ideas.
The man who runs may fight again.
The man who says 'I may be wrong, but' does not believe there can be any such possibility. Kin Hubbard
The man who sets out to carry a cat by its tail learns something that will always be useful and which never will grow dim or doubtful. -- Mark Twain.
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
The man who succeeds above his fellows is the one who early in life clearly discerns his object, and towards that object habitually directs his powers. Earl Nightingale
The man who trusts men will make fewer mistakes than he who distrusts them. Camillo di Cavour
The man who will live above his present circumstances, is in great danger of soon living beneath them; or as the Italian proverb says, 'The man that lives by hope, will die by despair.' Joseph Addison
The man who works for the gold in the job rather than for the money in the pay envelope, is the fellow who gets on. Joseph French Johnson
The marble keeps merely a cold and sad memory of a man who would else be forgotten. No man who needs a monument ever ought to have one. Nathaniel Hawthorne
The margin is narrow, but the responsibility is clear. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
The margin is very marginal.
The mark of a good action is that it appears inevitable in retrospect. Robert Louis Stevenson
The market...puts an almost irresistible pressure on every activity to justify itself in the only terms it recognizes: to become a business proposition, to pay its own way, to show black ink on the bottom line. It turns news into entertainment, schol Christopher Lasch (The Revolt of the Elites, 1995)
The marvels of today's modern technology include the development of a soda can, when discarded will last forever ... and a $7,000 car which when properly cared for will rust out in two or three years.
The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation ... A stereotyped but unconscious despair is concealed even under what are called the games and amusements of mankind. Henry David Thoreau
The masses are the opium of religion.
The meek shall inherit the Earth after we're done with it.
The meek shall inherit the earth -- they are too weak to refuse.
The meek shall inherit the earth, but not the mineral rights.
The meek shall inherit the earth, but not the mineral rights. J. Paul Getty
The meek shall inherit the earth, if that's OK with you
The meek shall inherit the earth.  They are too weak to refuse.
The men and women who have the right ideals ... are those who have the courage to strive for the happiness which comes only with labor and effort and self-sacrifice, and those whose joy in life springs in part from power of work and sense of duty. Theodore Roosevelt
The men who make history have not time to write it. Metternich
The mere apprehension of a coming evil has put many into a situation of the utmost danger. Lucan
The merit of originality is not novelty, it is sincerity. The believing man is the original man; he believes for himself, not for another. Thomas Carlyle
The merit of originality is not novelty; it is sincerity. Thomas Carlyle
The metalic years, silver hair, gold teeth, lead botom.
The metaphor of the melting pot is unfortunate and misleading. A more accurate analogy would be a salad bowl, for, though the salad is an entity, the lettuce can still be distinguished from the chicory, the tomatoes from the cabbage. Carl N. Degler
The mice which helplessly find themselves between the cats' teeth acquire no merit from their enforced sacrifice. Mahatma Gandhi
The mind does not create what it perceives, any more than the eye creates the rose. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The mind grows by what it feeds upon.
The mind has its own logic but does not often let others in on it. Bernard de Voto
The mind is like a parachute - it works only when open.
The mind is like the stomach. It is not how much you put into it that counts, but how much it digests. Albert Jay Nock
The mind is the 2nd thing to go, don't remember what's 1st.
The mind is what the brain does.
The mind may wander, but it never forgets.
The mind of the scholar, if he would leave it large and liberal, should come in contact with other minds. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
The mind that does not understand is the Buddha. There is no other. Ma-Tsu
The minister's brain is often the 'poor-box' of the church. Edwin Percy Whipple
The minority of a country is never known to agree, except in its efforts to reduce and oppress the majority. James Fenimore Cooper
The minute a man is convinced that he is interesting, he isn't.
The miser and the glutton are two facetious buzzards: one hides his store, and the other stores his hide. Josh Billings
The miser is as much in want of that which he has, as of that which he has not. Publilius Syrus
The miser, starving his brother's body, starves also his own soul, and at death shall creep out of his great estate of injustice, poor and naked and miserable. Theodore Parker
The misfortunes hardest to bear are these which never came. James Russell Lowell
The mistake a lot of politicians make is in forgetting they've been appointed and thinking they've been annointed. Mildred Webster Pepper
The mistake you make is in trying to figure it out.
The mob has many heads but no brains.
The mob is man voluntarily descending to the nature of the beast. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The mob is the mother of tyrants. Diogenes
The mode by which the inevitable comes to pass is effort. Oliver Wendell Holmes
The mode in which the inevitable comes to pass is through effort. Oliver Wendell Holmes
The modern king has become a vermiform appendix: useless when quiet; when obtrusive, in danger of removal. Austin O'Malley
The moment we indulge our affections, the earth is metamorphosed, there is no winter and no night; all tragedies, all ennuis, vanish, all duties even. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The moment you're born you're done for. Arnold Bennett
The money-changers have fled from their high seats in the temple of our civilization. We may now restore that temple to the ancient truths. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
The moon and other celestial bodies should be free for exploration and use by all countries. No country should be permitted to advance a claim of sovereignty. Lyndon Baines Johnson
The moon is made of a green cheese.| J.Heywood (1497-1580)
The moon is made of green cheese.
The moon may be smaller than Earth, but it's further away.
The moral majority is neither.
The more I know about WINDOWS, the more I like DesqView
The more I know about men the more I like dogs. Gloria Allred, feminist attorney, 1995
The more I learn, the more I have to learn.
The more I see of man... the more I like dogs. Madam de Stael
The more a man dreams, the less he believes. H. L. Mencken
The more gross the fraud the more glibly will it go down, and the more greedily be swallowed, since folly will always find faith where impostors will find imprudence. Charles Caleb Colton
The more gross the fraud, the more glibly will it go down and the more greedily will it be swallowed, since folly will always find faith wherever imposters will find impudence. Christian Nestell Bovee
The more he cast away the more he had. John Bunyan
The more heavily a man should be taxed, the more power he has to avoid it.
The more innocuous the modification appears to be, the further its influence will extend and the more the design will have to be redrawn. Fyfe's Second Law of Revision
The more known about people, the more to admire in dogs.
The more laws and order are made prominent, the more thieves and robbers there will be. | Lao Tsu
The more laws, the more offenders.
The more obstinately you try to learn how to shoot the arrow for the sake of hitting the goal, the less you will succeed in the one and the further the other will recede. Eugen Herrigel
The more people talk on the phone, the less money they make. | Ozman's Law
The more sins you confess, the more books you will sell. Anonymous
The more the merrier Proverb
The more the merrier.
The more things change, the more they stay insane.
The more things change, the more they'll never be the same again.
The more things you own, the more you are owned by things.
The more we disagree, the more chance there is that at least one of us is right.
The more we do, the more we can do. William Hazlitt
The more we study the more we discover our ignorance. Percy Bysshe Shelley
The more you cultivate people the more you turn up clods.
The more you know.... The luckier you get
The more you run over a cat, the flatter it gets.
The more you say, the less people remember.
The more you say, the less people remember. The fewer the words, the greater the profit. Fnelon
The more you study, the more you find out you don't know, but the more you study, the closer you come. Cozy Cole
The mosquito is the state bird of New Jersey. | Andy Warhol
The most beautiful experience we can have is the mysterious, the fundamental emotion which stands at the cradle of true art and true science., from Living Philosophies, 1931 Albert Einstein
The most beautiful experience we can have is the mysterious. It is the fundamental emotion which stands at the cradle of true art and true science. Albert Einstein
The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed. Albert Einstein
The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science.| Albert Einstein
The most conservative persons I ever met are college undergraduates. The radicals are the men past middle life. Woodrow Wilson
The most dangerous person in the world is an idealogue with a machine gun.
The most dangerous thing in the combat zone is an officer with a map. Murphy's Third Military Law
The most dangerous thing in the world is to try to leap a chasm in two jumps. William Lloyd George
The most delicate component will be dropped. Rosenfield's Regret
The most delightful pleasures cloy without variety. Publilius Syrus
The most difficult thing to open is a closed mind.
The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not "Eureka" (I found it) but "That's funny ..." | Isaac Asimov
The most exciting place to discover talent is within yourself.
The most harmful error has not yet been discovered in your program.
The most hopelessly stupid man is he who is not aware that he is wise.
The most important leg of a three legged stool is the one that's missing.
The most important leg of a three legged stool is the one that's missing. Lyall's Fundamental Observation
The most important persuasion tool you have in your entire arsenal is integrity., Zig Ziglar
The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. Theodore M. Hesburgh
The most inconvenient feature about poverty is that one is apt to get used to it.
The most intelligent people we know are those who ask advice.
The most original authors are not so because they advance what is new, but because they put what they have to say as if it had never been said before. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
The most pitiful human ailment is a birdseed heart. Wilson Mizner
The most popular labor saving device is still money. Phyllis George
The most profound joy has more of gravity than of gaiety in it. Michel de Montaigne
The most serious charge which can be brought against New England is not Puritanism but February. Joseph Wood Krutch
The most solid stone is the lowest one in the foundation.
The most terrible job in warfare is to be a second lieutenant leading a platoon when you are on the battlefield., 3/17/54 Dwight D. Eisenhower
The most thoroughly wasted of all days is that on which one has not laughed. Chamfort
The most valuable gift you can give your family is a good example.
The most valuable of all talents is never using two words when one will do. Thomas Jefferson
The mother of all taglines.
The mother's heart is the child's schoolroom. Henry Ward Beecher
The motor will rotate in the wrong direction.
The mountains, rivers, earth, grasses, trees, and forests are always emanating a subtle, precious light, day and night, always emanating a subtle, precious sound, demonstrating and expounding to all people the unsurpassed ultimate truth. Yuan-Sou
The mouse with a single hole is quickly caught by the cat
The moving cat sheds, and having shed, moves on...
The moving cursor writes, and having written, blinks on.
The moving finger writhes and, having writhed, moves on.
The multitude which is not brought to act as a unity, is confusion. That unity which has not its origin in the multitude is tyranny. Blaise Pascal
The musician who always plays on the same string is laughed at. Horace
The naked truth of it is, I have no shirt.
The narrower the mind, the broader the statement. Ted Cook
The nation behaves well if it treats the natural resources as assets which it must turn over to the next generation increased, and not impaired, in value. Theodore Roosevelt
The nation will find it very hard to look up to the leaders who are keeping their ears to the ground. Winston Churchill
The nation's honor is dearer than the nation's comfort; yes, than the nation's life itself. Woodrow Wilson
The national sport of England is obstacle racing. People fill their rooms with useless and cumbersome furniture, and spend the rest of their lives trying to dodge it. Herbert Beerbohm Tree
The natural principle of war is to do the most harm to our enemy with the least harm to ourselves; and this of course is to be effected by strategem. Washington Irving
The natural role of twentieth-century man is anxiety. Norman Mailer
The nature of a society is largely determined by the direction in which talent and ambition flowby the tilt of the social landscape. Eric Hoffer
The nearest approach to immortality on earth is a government bureau. James F. Byrnes
The new Congressmen say they're going to turn the government around.  I hope I don't get run over again.
The new hardware will break down as soon as the old is disconnected and out.
The newest books are those that never grow old. Holbrook Jackson
The next World War will be fought with stones. Albert Einstein
The next best thing to being witty one's self, is to be able to quote another's wit. Christian Nestell Bovee
The next dreadful thing to a battle lost is a battle won.
The next sentence is true.  The previous sentence is false.
The next sentence is true. The last sentence was false
The next six days are dangerous.
The nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people, they think it's their fault. Henry Kissinger
The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people. Lucille S. Harper
The nice thing about standards is that there are so many of them to choose from. | Andrew S. Tanenbaum
The nice thing about standards is that there are so many of them to choose from.| Andrew S. Tanenbaum
The nice thing about standards is, there are so many to choose from. Anonymous
The nice thing about standards is... there's so many of them!
The no-mind not-thinks no-thoughts about no-things.
The noblest exercise of the mind within doors, and most befitting a person of quality, is study. William Ramsay
The non-violent Star Trek: Set phasers on tickle.
The nonsensical ravings of a lunatic mind.
The nose of a mob is its imagination. By this, at any time, it can be quietly led. Edgar Allan Poe
The notion of a "record" is an obsolete remnant of the days of the 80-column card. | Dennis M. Ritchie
The notion of a "record" is an obsolete remnant of the days of the 80-column card.| Dennis M. Ritchie
The number of a person's relatives is directly proportional to his fame.
The number of people in any working group tends to increase regardless of the amount of work to be done. | Parkinson's Fourth Law
The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.
The number of women a man find attractive is truly proportionate to his age.
The number you call from has been disconnected.
The number you have dialed is imaginary. Please divide by 0 and try again. Anonymous
The number you have reached is not in service !
The object of oratory is not truth, but persuasion. Lord Macaulay
The objection of the scandalmonger is not that she tells of racy doings, but that she pretends to be indignant about them. H. L. Mencken
The obvious answer is always overlooked.
The occipital area of my head seems to have impacted...
The old gun-in-the-KAOS-agent's-sphincter trick. That's the second time I've fallen for that this month.| Maxwell Smart
The old know more about being young than the young know about being old.
The old system of having a baby was much better than the new system, the old system being characterized by the fact that the man didn't have to watch. Dave Barry
The old ways are the safest and surest ways. Charles Caleb Colton
The older I grow the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom. H. L. Mencken
The older a man gets, the farther he had to walk to school as a boy.
The older we grow the greater becomes our wonder at how much ignorance one can contain without bursting one's clothes. Mark Twain
The one function that TV news performs very well is that when ther is no news we give it to you with the same emphasis as if it were. David Brinkley
The one good thing about repeating your mistakes is that you know when to cringe.
The one person who has more illusions than the dreamer is the man of action. Oscar Wilde
The one thing in the world, of value, is the active soul. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience. Harper Lee
The one who dies with the most toys is dead.
The one who says it cannot be done should never interrupt the one who is doing it. Anonymous
The one with the most typefaces when he dies, WINS !
The only alternative to perseverance is failure.
The only antidote to mental suffering is physical pain. Karl Marx
The only argument with the wind is to put on a coat.
The only calendar I need is just outside my window. With eyes to see and ears to hear, nature keeps me posted. Alfred A. Montapert
The only certainty is that nothing is certain.
The only cure for grief is action. George Henry Lewes
The only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.
The only cure for vanity is laughter, and the only fault that's laughable is vanity. Henri Bergson
The only deadly sin I know is cynicism. Henry L. Stimson
The only difference between a rut and a grave is their dimensions.
The only difference between a rut and a grave is their dimensions. Ellen Glasgow
The only disadvantage of an honest heart is credulity. Philip Sidney
The only fence against the world is a thorough knowledge of it. John Locke
The only good Mac is a big Mac
The only good husbands stay bachelors: They're too considerate to get married. Finley Peter Dunne
The only good imitations are those that poke fun at bad originals. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
The only good in pretending is the fun we get out of fooling ourselves that we fool somebody. Booth Tarkington
The only heavy breathing I ever hear is after aerobics.
The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today. Let us move forward with strong and active faith. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
The only method by which people can be supported is out of the effort of those who are earning their own way. We must not create a deterrent to hard work. Robert A. Taft
The only one who got everything done by Friday was Robinson Crusoe.
The only one who is wiser than anyone is everyone. Napoleon Bonaparte
The only people who never fail are those who never try. Ilka Chase
The only perfect science is hindsight.
The only person who doesn't use am offline mail reader!
The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary.
The only possible interpretation of any research whatever in the `social sciences' is: some do, some don't. | Ernest Rutherford
The only problem with being a man of leisure is that you can never stop and take a rest.
The only profession that labors incessantly to destroy the reason for its own existence. James Bryce
The only race worth winning is the human race.
The only realities are the atoms and empty space.
The only reason I would take up jogging is so I could hear heavy breathing again. Erma Bombeck
The only reward of virtue is virtue. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The only right is what is after my constitution; the only wrong is what is against it. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The only rose without thorns is friendship.
The only safe ruler is he who has learned to obey willingly. Thomas  Kempis
The only safe ship in a storm is leadership. Faye Wattleton
The only short meetings are when no one shows up.
The only stupid question is the one that isn't asked.
The only summit meeting that can succeed is the one that does not take place. Barry M. Goldwater
The only sure thing about luck is that it will change. Wilson Mizner
The only thing constant is change.
The only thing funnier than how things don't work out, is how they do.
The only thing shorter than a weekend is a vacation.
The only thing that endures is change.
The only thing that makes life possible is permanent, intolerable uncertainty; not knowing what comes next. Ursula K. LeGuin
The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on.  It is never any use to oneself. | Oscar Wilde
The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on; it is never of any use to oneself. Oscar Wilde
The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself. Oscar Wilde
The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.
The only thing wrong with doing nothing is that you never know when you're done
The only things one can admire at length are those one admires without knowing why. Jean Rostand
The only things that start on time are those that you're late for. Cayo's Law
The only time people dislike gossip is when you gossip about them. Will Rogers
The only time some people work like a horse is when their boss rides them.
The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you are in the bathroom. Anonymous
The only time you don't fail is the last time you try anythingand it works. William Strong
The only tyrannies from which men, women and children are suffering in real life are the tyrannies of minorities. Theodore Roosevelt
The only tyrant I accept in this world is the still voice within. Mahatma Gandhi
The only way for a rich man to be healthy is by exercise and abstinence, to live as if he were poor. William Temple
The only way to amuse some people is to slip and fall on an icy pavement.
The only way to be good at everything you do is to only do the things you are good at.
The only way to discover the limits of the possible is to go beyond them into the impossible.
The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.
The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. Oscar Wilde
The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. | Oscar Wilde
The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.| Oscar Wilde
The only way to get rid of responsibilities is to discharge them. Walter S. Robertson
The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it.
The only way to have a friend is to be one. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The only way to judge the future is by knowing the past.
The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not. Mark Twain
The only way to learn a new programming language is to write programs in it.
The only way you can do that [decrease taxes, balance the budget, and increase military spending] is with mirrors, and that's what it would take. John B. Anderson
The only winner of the War of 1812 was Tchaikovsky.
The opera ain't over till the fat lady sings. Dan Cook
The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth. | Bohr
The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.| Neils Bohr
The opposite of bravery is not cowardice but conformity. Robert Anthony
The opposite of talking isn't listening. The opposite of talking is waiting. Fran Leibowitz
The oppression of any people for opinion's sake has rarely had any other effect than to fix those opinions deeper and render them more important. Hosea Ballou
The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true. James Branch Cabell
The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true. James Branch Cabell, from The Silver Stallion
The optimist sees the rose and not its thorns; the pessimist stares at the thorns, oblivious to the rose. Kahlil Gibran
The optimist thinks this is the best of all possible worlds. The pessimist fears it is true. Robert Oppenheimer
The optimum committee has no members. | Norman Augustine
The order and connection of ideas is the same as the order and connection of things.
The original multitasker : two PCs and a chair with wheels !
The other day I was playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house Stephen Wright and four people died. The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree. Stephen Wright
The other day, I was walking my dog around my building...on the ledge. Some people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths. Stephen Wright
The other line always moves faster.
The other line moves faster.
The other line moves faster. Etorre's Observation
The pagans do not know God, and love only the earth. The Jews know the true God, and love only the earth. The Christians know the true God, and do not love the earth. Blaise Pascal
The pain of the mind is worse than the pain of the body. Publilius Syrus
The paper is always strongest at the perforations.
The passions are like fire, useful in a thousand ways and dangerous only in one, through their excess. Christian Nestell Bovee
The passions are the only orators which always persuade. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
The passions grafted on wounded pride are the most inveterate; they are green and vigorous in old age. George Santayana
The past always looks better than it was.  It's only pleasant because it isn't here.
The past always looks better than it was.  It's only pleasant because it isn't here. | Finley Peter Dunne (Mr. Dooley)
The past always looks better than it was; it's only pleasant because it isn't here. Finley Peter Dunne
The past is not what it will be.
The past looks better the farther away you get.
The past should be a springboard, not a hammock.
The path of sound credence is through the thick forest of skepticism. George Jean Nathan
The path to success is to take massive, determined action. Anthony Robbins
The patient's taken a turn for the nurse.
The patriot volunteer, fighting for country and his rights, makes the most reliable soldier on earth. Thomas J. (Stonewall) Jackson
The pen is mightier than the pencil.
The pen is mightier than the sword.
The pen is the tongue of the mind.
The pen really is mightier than the sword!
The penalty for bigamy is having two mothers-in-law.
The penalty of success is to be bored by the attentions of people who formerly snubbed you. M. W. Little
The pendulum has gone full circle.
The people I'm furious with are the women's liberationists. They keep getting up on soapboxes and proclaiming that women are brighter than men. It's true, but it should be kept quiet or it ruins the whole racket. Anita Loos
The people are to be taken in very small doses. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The people who remained victorious were less like conquerors than conquered. Saint Augustine
The perfect guest is one who makes his host feel at home.
The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post. George Bernard Shaw, english playwrite
The perfect secretary is one who types fast and runs slow.
The person who is all wrapped up in himself is overdressed.
The person who knows how to laugh at himself will never cease to be amused. Shirley Maclaine
The person who snores loudest will fall asleep first.
The person who talks most of his own virtue is often the least virtuous. Jawaharlal Nehru
The person whruns away exposes himself to that very danger more than a person who sits quietly. Jawaharlal Nehru
The person you rejected yesterday could make you happy, if you say yes.
The pessimist complains about the wind; The optimist expects it to change; The realist adjusts the sails. William Arthur Ward
The philosophy exam was a piece of cake, which was a bit of a surprise, actually, because I was expecting some questions on a sheet of paper. Anonymous
The philosophy of one century is the common sense of the next. Henry Ward Beecher
The phone is baroque. Please call Bach later.
The pillars of truth and the pillars of freedomthey are the pillars of society. Henrik Ibsen
The pleasures of the palate deal with us like the Egyptian thieves, who strangle those whom they embrace. Seneca
The plural of spouse is spice.
The policy of being too cautious is the greatest risk of all. Jawaharlal Nehru
The political machine works because it is a united minority acting against a divided majority. Will Durant
The political world is stimulating. It's the most interesting thing you can do. It beats following the dollar. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
The polls show 8 out of 5 schizophrenics agree!
The poor suffer twice at the rioter's hands. First, his destructive fury scars their neighborhood; second, the atmosphere of accommodation and consent is changed to one of hostility and resentment. Lyndon Baines Johnson
The possum is a very sophisticated animal.  It doesn't even get up until 5 or 6 pm.
The power and diversity of the Armed Forces, active Guard and Reserve, the resolve of our fellow citizens, the flexibility in our command to navigate international waters that remain troubled are all essential to our security. Gerald R. Ford
The power that is supported by force alone will have cause often to tremble. Lajos Kossuth
The power to tax involves the power to destroy. John Marshall
The practical effect of a belief is the real test of its soundness. James A. Froude
The present condition of fame is merely fashion. Gilbert K. Chesterton
The present contains nothing more than the past, and what is found in the effect was already in the cause. Henri Bergson
The press is not only free, it is powerful. That power is ours. It is the proudest that man can enjoy. Benjamin Disraeli
The price of greatness is responsibility.
The price of greatness is responsibility. Sir Winston Churchill
The price of liberty is eternal vigilance...
The price of purity is purists.
The principle of give and take is the principle of diplomacygive one and take ten. Mark Twain
The principles of a free constitution are irrecoverably lost, when the legislative power is nominated by the executive. Edward Gibbon
The private control of credit is the modern form of slavery. Upton Sinclair
The privilege of absurdity; to which no living creature is subject but man only. Thomas Hobbes
The probability of anything happening is in inverse ratio to its desirability.
The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.
The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action. Hartley's First Law
The problem in defense is how far you can go without destroying from within what you are trying to defend from without. Dwight D. Eisenhower
The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem. Theodore Rubin
The problem with any unwritten law is that you don't know where to go to erase it. | Glaser and Way
The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues. Elizabeth Taylor, actress
The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues. |- Elizabeth Taylor
The problem with the future is it turns into the present.
The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
The problem with the gene pool is there's no lifeguard
The problems of victory are more agreeable than those of defeat, but they are no less difficult. Winston Churchill
The product that will not sell without advertising will not sell profitably with advertising. Albert Lasker
The profoundest thought or passion sleeps as in a mine, until an equal mind and heart finds and publishes it. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The program is absolutely right; therefore the computer must be wrong.
The programming is never done.
The proof is the phylogeny of plant-animal interactions.
The proof of a system's value is its existence.
The proof of the pudding is in the eating Proverb
The proof of the pudding is in the eating.
The proper method for hastening the decay of error is ... by teaching every man to think for himself. William Godwin
The prosperous man is never sure that he is loved for himself. Lucan
The prudence of the best heads is often defeated by the tenderness of the best of hearts. Henry Fielding
The public good is in nothing more essentially interested, than in the protection of every individual's private rights. Sir William Blackstone
The public have neither shame nor gratitude. William Hazlitt
The public is a ferocious beast: one must either chain it up or flee from it. Voltaire
The public is the only critic whose opinion is worth anything at all. Mark Twain
The public is wiser than the wisest critic. George Bancroft
The public wishes itself to be managed like a woman; one must say nothing to it except what it likes to hear. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
The punishment which the wise suffer, who refuse to take part in government, is to live under the government of worse men. Plato
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple. Oscar Wilde
The purification of politics is an iridescent dream.
The purpose firm is equal to the deed. Edward Young
The purpose of computing is insight, not numbers.
The purpose of education is to replace an empty mind with an open one Malcom Forbes
The purpose of foreign policy is not to provide an outlet for our own sentiments of hope or indignation; it is to shape real events in a real world. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
The purpose of the propeller is as a fan to keep the pilot cool.  Turn it off and watch him sweat.
The pursuit of perfection, then, is the pursuit of sweetness and light. Matthew Arnold
The pursuit of truth and beauty is a sphere of activity in which we are permitted to remain children all our lives. Albert Einstein
The pursuit, even of the best things, ought to be calm and tranquil. Cicero
The quality of a person's life is in direct proportion to their commitment to excellence, regardless of their chosen field of endeavor. Vince Lombardi
The quality of mercy is not strain'd; It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven Upon the place beneath. It is twice blest: It blesseth him that gives and him that takes. William Shakespeare
The quality of mercy is not strained. There are a lot of lumps floating in it that can make you choke.
The quality of the imagination is to flow and not to freeze. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The quartermaster has only two sizes, too large and too small. Murphy's Ninth Military Law
The question 'Who ought to be boss?' is like as 'Who ought to be the tenor in the quartet?' Obviously, the man who can sing tenor. Henry Ford
The question is not so much whether there is life on Mars as whether it will continue to be possible to live on Earth. Anon.
The race could save one-half its wasted labor Would each reform himself and spare his neighbor. Frank Putnam
The race from stupidity is to the driven, not the swift.
The race of mankind would perish did they cease to aid each other. We cannot exist without mutual help. All therefore that need aid have a right to ask it from their fellow-men; and no one who has the power of granting can refuse it without guilt. Walter Scott
The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopts them. Mark Twain
The rain it raineth on the just And also on the unjust fella, But chiefly on the just, because The unjust steals the just's umbrella.
The rainy days a man saves for usually seem to arrive during his vacation. Anonymous
The range of what we think and do is limited by what we fail to notice. And, because we fail to notice that we fail to notice, there is little we can do to change until we notice how our failing to notice shapes our thoughts and deeds. R. D. Laing
The rapture of pursuing is the prize the vanquished gain. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
The real Antichrist is he who turns the wine of an original idea into the water of mediocrity. Eric Hoffer
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing in the right place but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. Lady Dorothy Nevill
The real being, with no status, is always going in and out through the doors of your face. Lin-Chi
The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old. Jean Kerr
The real objective of a committee isn't to reach a decision but to avoid it.
The real significance of crime is in its being a breach of faith with the community of mankind. Joseph Conrad
The real world is not easy to live in. It is rough; it is slippery. Without the most clear-eyed adjustments we fall and get crushed. A man
The realist is the man, who having weighed all the visible factors in a given situation and having found that the odds are against him, decides that fighting is useless. Raoul de Sales
The really frightening thing about middle age is the knowledge that you'll grow out of it. Doris Day
The reason computer chips are so small is computers don't eat much.
The reason the way of the transgressor is hard is because it's so crowded. Kin Hubbard
The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work. Robert Frost
The reasonable man adapts himself to the world, but the unreasonable man tries to adapt the world to himtherefore, all progress depends upon the unreasonable man. Samuel Butler
The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself.  Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man. | George Bernard Shaw
The registered copy don't work either?
The reliability of new equipment is inversely proportional to its cost.
The remaining work to finish in order to reach your goal increases as the deadline approaches. Bove's Theorem
The remedy for wrongs is to forget them. Publilius Syrus
The reputation of a man is like his shadow, gigantic when it precedes him, and pigmy in its proportions when it follows. Alexandre de Talleyrand-Prigord
The responsibility of tolerance lies in those who have the wider vision. George Eliot
The rest is overhead for the operating system. Anonymous
The reverse side also has a reverse side. Japanese Proverb
The revolution will not be televised.
The reward of a thing well done is to have done it.
The reward of a thing well done is to have done it. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The reward of a thing well done is to have done it. | Emerson
The reward of a thing well done is to have done it.| Ralph Waldo Emerson
The reward of great men is that, long after they have died, one is not quite sure that they are dead. Jules Renard
The rich get rich, and the poor get poorer.  The haves get more, the have-nots die.
The rich get rich, and the poor get poorer. The haves get more, the have-nots die.
The rich get richer; the poor get babies.
The richer your friends, the more they will cost you. Elizabeth Marbury
The right half of the brain controls the left half of the body. This means that only left handed people are in their right mind.
The right kind of monarchy is one where everybody goes about with the permanent conviction that the king can do no wrong. Gilbert K. Chesterton
The right to be alonethe most comprehensive of rights, and the right most valued by civilized man. Louis D. Brandeis
The right to be heard does not include the right to be taken seriously. Hubert H. Humphrey
The ripest fruit falls first.
The ripest fruit falls first..
The road of life can only reveal itself as it is traveled; each turn in the road reveals a surprise. Man's future is hidden. Anonymous
The road to Hades is easy to travel.
The road to Hell is paved with good intentions. Karl Marx
The road to hell is paved with NAND gates.
The road to hell is paved with good intentions Proverb
The road to hell is paved with good intentions. Karl Marx
The road to hell is thick with taxicabs. Don Herold
The road to success is always under construction.
The road to success is filled with women pushing their husbands along. Thomas R. Dewar
The road to success is under construction...
The road to success, is always under construction.
The road to the patent office is paved with good inventions.
The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say. Anais Nin
The rooster may crow, but the hen delivers.
The root of all evil is the heart of a black soul
The rose and the thorn, and sorrow and gladness are linked together. Saadi
The rule in carving holds good as to criticism; never cut with a knife what you can cut with a spoon. Charles Buxton
The sacred cows have come home to roost with a vengeance.
The safest way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket. Kin Hubbard
The safest words are always those which bring us most directly to facts. Charles H. Parkhurst
The salvation of the world is in man's suffering. William Faulkner
The satirist shoots to kill while the humorist brings his prey back alive and eventually releases him again for another chance. Peter De Vries
The scenery only changes for the lead dog!
The science of today is the technology of tomorrow. Edward Teller
The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage. Mark Russell
The score didn't really reflect the outcome.
The seabird hater left no tern unstoned.
The secret of a successful restaurant is sharp knives. George Orwell
The secret of business is to know something nobody else knows. Aristotle Onassis
The secret of contentment is knowing how to enjoy what you have, and to be able to lose all desire for things beyond your reach. Lin Yutang
The secret of education lies in respecting the pupil.
The secret of forgiving everything is to understand nothing. George Bernard Shaw
The secret of getting ahead is getting started. Sally Berger
The secret of having a personal life is not answering too many questions about it. Joan Collins
The secret of selling yourself is to have a product you truly believe in.
The secret of success is constancy of purpose. Benjamin Disraeli
The secret of success is constancy to purpose. Benjamin Disraeli
The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources. Albert Einstein
The secret to happiness?  Never face facts.
The secret to success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made.
The sensual and the dark rebel, in vain
The sentiment of justice is so natural, and so universally acquired by all mankind, that it seems to be independent of all law, all party, all religion. Voltaire
The sergeant is the Army. Dwight D. Eisenhower
The sheer joy of living is wonderful.
The shifts of Fortune test the reliability of friends.
The ship of heaven guides itself and will not accept a wooden rudder. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The shortest answer is doing.
The shortest distance between two points is generally under repair.
The shortest distance between two points is off the wal
The shortest distance between two points is under construction. McGregor's Revised Maxim
The shortest distance between two points is under construction. | Noelie Altito
The shortest distance between two points is usually under construction.
The shortest distance between two puns is a straight line.
The shoulders of a borrower are always a little straighter than those of a beggar. Morris Leopold Ernst
The show ain't over 'till the fat lady sings.
The show must go on Proverb
The simple explanation always follows the complex souti
The sinning is the best part of repentance. Arabic Proverb
The sixth sheikh's sixth sheep's sick.
The size of a mega byte of storage depends on whether you are entering data or writing a program to fit in it.
The sky is no longer the limit. Richard M. Nixon
The sleeping fox catches no poultry. Benjamin Franklin
The slight that can be conveyed in a glance, in a gracious smile, in a wave of the hand, is often the ne plus ultra of art. What insult is so keen or so keenly felt, as the polite insult which it is impossible to resent? Julia Kavanagh
The smaller the head, the bigger the dream. Austin O'Malley
The smallest good deed is better than the grandest good intention.
The smallest handcuff in the world is a wedding ring.
The smallest number, with God and truth on their side, are weightier than thousands. Charles Simmons
The smallest seed of faith is better than the largest fruit of happiness. Henry David Thoreau
The smallest worm will turn being trodden on.
The smile of God is victory. John Greenleaf Whittier
The smoker you drink, the player you get.
The solution to a problem changes the nature of the problem.
The solution to the problem changes the problem.
The sooner you fall behind, the more time you have to catch up.
The soul of God is poured into the world through the thoughts of men. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The soul would have no rainbow had the eyes no tears.
The soul, like the body, lives by what it feeds on. Josiah Gilbert Holland
The sound of many hands clapping. Ol!
The speed of time is one second per second. Anonymous
The spirit, the will to win, and the will to excel are the things that endure. These qualities are so much more important than the events that occur. Vince Lombardi
The splendid discontent of God With chaos made the world... And from the discontent of man The worlds best progrss springs. Ella Wheeler Wilcox
The squeaking wheel gets the grease.
The star of riches is shining upon you.
The steady state of disks is full. | Ken Thompson
The stoical scheme of supplying our wants by lopping off our desires, is like cutting off our feet when we want shoes. Jonathan Swift
The stories of childhood leave an indelible impression, and their author always has a niche in the temple of memory from which the image is never cast out to be thrown on the rubbish heap of things that are outgrown and outlived. Howard Pyle
The strength of a chain is it's weakest link.
The strength of a man consists in finding out the way God is going, and going that way. Henry Ward Beecher
The strength of criticism lies in the weakness of the thing criticized. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
The strength of the turbulence is directly proportional to the temperature of you coffee. Gunter's Second Law of Air Travel
The strong and virtuous admit no destiny. Edward Bulwer-Lytton
The successful man is the one who finds out what is the matter with his business before his competitors do. Roy L. Smith
The sun also shines on the wicked. Seneca
The sun got confused about day Stephen Wright
The sun was shining on the sea, Shining with all his might: He did his very best to make The billows smooth and bright -- And this was very odd, because it was The middle of the night. | Lewis Carroll, "Through the Looking Glass"
The superfluous is very necessary.
The superfluous is very necessary. | Voltaire
The superior man is firm in the right way, and not merely firm. Confucius
The superior man is the providence of the inferior. He is eyes for the blind, strength for the weak, and a shield for the defenseless. Robert Green Ingersoll
The superior man understands what is right; the inferior man understands what will sell. Confucius
The superiority of some men is merely local. They are great because their associates are little. Samuel Johnson
The sure way to be cheated is to think one's self more cunning than others. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
The surest cure for vanity is loneliness. Thomas Wolfe
The surest way to be late is to have plenty of time.
The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently. Friedrich Nietzsche
The surest way to establish your credit is to work yourself into the position of not needing any. Maurice Switzer
The surest way to hit a woman's heart is to take aim kneeling. Douglas Jerrold
The surface of American society is covered with a layer of democratic paint, but from time to time one can see the old aristocratic colors breaking through. Alexis de Tocqueville
The surrender of life is nothing to sinking down into acknowledgment of inferiority. John C. Calhoun
The sweetest of all sounds is that of the voice of the woman we love. Jean de La Bruyre
The sword conquered for a while, but the spirit conquers for ever! Sholem Asch
The task of a university is the creation of the future, so far as rational thought and civilized modes of appreciation can affect the issue. Alfred North Whitehead
The tax collector must love poor peoplehe's creating so many of them. Bill Vaughan
The teacher is one who makes two ideas grow where only one grew before. Elbert Hubbard
The telephone will ring when you are outside the door fumbling for your keys.
The temporary alternative to death is insecurity.
The tendency of an event to occur varies inversely with one's preparation for it. David Searles
The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas at the same time, and still retain the ability to function. F. Scott Fitzgerald
The test of a preacher is that his congregation goes away saying, not 'What a lovely sermon' but, 'I will do something!' St. Francis de Sales
The thing generally raised on city land is taxes. Charles Dudley Warner
The thing most generally raised on land is taxes.
The things that I can't have I want, And what I have seems second-rate, The things I want to do I can't, And what I have to do I hate. Don Marquis
The thinner the ice, the more anxious is everyone to see whether it will bear. Josh Billings
The thoughtless are rarely wordless.
The three laws of thermodynamics: The First Law: You can't get anything without working for it. The Second Law:	The most you can accomplish by working is to break even. The Third Law:	You can only break even at absolute zero.
The three most dreaded words of computing. Hard Disk Failure.
The three most puzzling questions are:  1) Why are we born?  2) Why do we die?  3) Why do we spend so much of the intervening time wearing digital watches?
The thrill is gone, the thrill is gone baby
The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.
The time is past when Christians in America can take a long spoon and hand the gospel to the black man out the back door. Mordecai W. Johnson
The time is right to make new friends.
The time is right to pursue your endeavors.
The torture never stops.
The total absence of humor from the Bible is one of the most singular things in all lerature. Alfred North Whitehead
The trade union movement represents the organized economic power of the workers ... It is in reality the most potent and the most direct social insurance the workers can establish. Samuel Gompers
The tragedy of life is not so much what men suffer, but rather what they miss. Thomas Carlyle
The tragedy of war is that it uses man's best to do man's worst. Harry Emerson Fosdick
The traveler sees what he sees, the tourist sees what he has come to see. Gilbert K. Chesterton
The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. It is it's natural manure. Thomas Jefferson
The trick in overcoming temptation, is to play dead.
The trick to flying, missing the ground.
The trodden path is the safest.
The trodden path is the safest. Legal Maxim
The trouble with America isn't that the poetry of life has turned to prose, but that it has turned to advertising copy. Louis Kronenberger
The trouble with a kitten is that When it grows up, it's always a cat | Ogden Nash.
The trouble with a kitten is that it eventually beomes a cat. Ogden Nash
The trouble with a kitten is that, eventually it's a cat.
The trouble with being poor is that it takes up all your time.
The trouble with being punctual is that people think you have nothing more important to do.
The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.
The trouble with facts is that there are so many of them.
The trouble with most of us is that we would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism. Norman Vincent Peale
The trouble with our times is that the future is not what it used to be. Paul Valery
The trouble with people is not that they don't know but that they know so much that ain't so. Josh Billings
The trouble with reality is there's no background music
The trouble with resisting temptation is that it may never come again.
The trouble with some of us is that we have been inoculated with small doses of Christianity which keep us from catching the real thing. Leslie Dixon Weatherhead
The trouble with the public is that there is too much of it; what we need in public is less quantity and more quality. Don Marquis
The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win you're still a rat. Lilly Tomlin, actress, author and commedian
The true art of government consists in not governing too much. Jonathan Shipley
The true gentleman is subtly poised between an inner tact and an outer defense. Puzant Kevork Thomajan
The true grandeur of humanity is in moral elevation, sustained, enlightened and decorated by the intellect of man. Charles Sumner
The true ideal is not opposed to the real but lies in it; and blessed are the eyes that find it. James Russell Lowell
The true meaning of religion is thus not simply morality, but morality touched by emotion. Matthew Arnold
The true measure of a man is his ability to hurt others.
The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good. Ann Landers
The true pleasures in life are almost always overshadowed by the blatently obvious ones.
The true use of speech is not so much to express our wants as to conceal them. Oliver Goldsmith
The true way to gain much, is never to desire to gain too much. Francis Beaumont
The truest expression of a people is in its dance and music. Agnes de Mille
The truest expression of a people is in its dances and its music. Bodies never lie. Agnes De Mille
The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it. Flannery O'Connor
The truth doesn't hurt unless it ought to.
The truth is always the strongest argument.
The truth is more important than the facts.
The truth is more important than the facts. Frank Lloyd Wright
The truth is not always the same as the majority decision. Pope Jean Paul
The truth is not wonderful enough to suit the newspapers; so they enlarge upon it, and invent ridiculous embellishments. Annie Sullivan
The truth is often a terrible weapon of aggression. It is possible to lie, and even to murder, with the truth. Alfred Adler
The truth is one thing that nobody will believe.
The truth of a proposition has nothing to do with its credibility.  And vice versa.
The truth that survives is simply the lie that is pleasantest to believe. H. L. Mencken
The truth, however, is not pertinent to the issue.
The turtle lives 'twixt plated decks Which practically conceal its sex. I think it clever of the turtle In such a fix to be so fertile. | Ogden Nash
The tweeters are all burned out....
The two World Wars came in part, like much modern literature and art, because men, whose nature is to tire of everything in turn, ... tired of common sense and civilization. F. L. Lucas
The two great tragedies in life: not getting what one wants and getting it.
The two most beautiful words in English are "Cheque Enclosed".
The two most precious things this side of the grave are our reputation and our life. But it is to be lamented that the most contemptible whisper may deprive us of the one, and the weakest weapon of the other. Charles Caleb Colton
The typewriting machine, when played with expression, is no more annoying than the piano when played by a sister or near relation. | Oscar Wilde
The tyranny of a prince in an oligarchy is not so dangerous to the public welfare as the apathy of a citizen in a democracy. Montesquieu
The ultimate Path is without difficulty. Just avoid picking and choosing. Seng-Ts'an
The ultimate Turn on.  When they shoot at you.. and miss
The ultimate end of all revolutionary social change is to establish the sanctity of human life, the dignity of man, the right of every human being to liberty and well-being. Emma Goldman
The ultimate mail reader is here!!!!
The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy. Martin Luther King, Jr.
The unexamined life is not worth living.  |  Socrates
The unfortunate thing about this world is that the good habits are much easier to give up than the bad ones. W. Somerset Maugham
The unity of freedom has never relied on uniformity of opinion. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
The universe is all a spinoff of the Big Bang.
The universe is duly in order, everything in its place. Walt Whitman
The universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper. Eden Phillpotts
The universe is laughing behind your back
The universe is laughing behind your back.
The universe is made of stories, not of atoms. Muriel Rukeyser
The universe is one of God's thoughts. Johann von Schiller
The universe is simple - it's the explanation that's complex.
The universe, as far as we can observe it, is a wonderful and immense engine. George Santayana
The university is not engaged in making ideas safe for students. It is engaged in making students safe for ideas. Clark Kerr
The university most worthy of rational admiration is that one in which your lonely thinker can feel himself lonely, most positively furthered, and most richly fed. William James
The unnatural, that too is natural.
The upper crust is just a bunch of crumbs clinging together.
The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense. | E. W. Dijkstra
The use of money is all the advantage there is in having it. Benjamin Franklin
The use of money is all the advantage there is in having money. Benjamin Franklin
The use of violence as an instrument of persuasion is therefore inviting and seems to the discontented to be the only effective protest. William O. Douglas
The usefulness of any meeting is in inverse proportion to the attendance.
The value of a principle is the number of things it will explain; and there is no good theory of disease which does not at once suggest a cure. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The value of a program is proportional to the weight of its output.
The value of a program is proportional to the weight of its output. Laws of Computer Programming, VI
The value of knowledge lies not in its accumulation, but in its utilization.
The very best impromptu speeches are the ones written well in advance. Ruth Gordon
The very remembrance of my former misfortune proves a new one to me.
The vine Jane! No the vine! aaiiieeeee...
The violence done us by others is often less painful than that which we do to ourselves. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
The virtues and vices are all put in motion by interest. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
The vitality of thought is in adventure. Ideas won't keep. Something must be done about them. When the idea is new, its custodians have fervor, live for it, and if need be, die for it. Alfred North Whitehead
The voice of the majority is no proof of justice. Johann von Schiller
The wages of sin are sables. Anon.
The waste of life occasioned by trying to do too many things at once is appalling. Orison S. Marden
The wavering mind is but a base possession. Euripides
The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain. Dolly Parton
The way of the world is, to praise dead saints, and persecute living ones. Nathaniel Howe
The way to a man's heart is through the left ventricle.
The way to fight a woman is with your hat. Grab it and run. John Barrymore
The way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it. Oscar Wilde
The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.
The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost. G. K. Chesterton
The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost. Gilbert K. Chesterton
The way to stop financial joy-riding is to arrest the chauffeur, not the automobile. Woodrow Wilson
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. Mahatma Gandhi
The weakest link in a chain is the strongest because it can break it. Stanislaw J. Lec
The wealth of a soul is measured by how much it can feel; its poverty by how little. William Rounseville Alger
The weather is here, wish you were beautiful.
The weather is here.  Wish you were beautiful.|Bumper sticker
The weather-cock on the church spire, though made of iron, would soon be broken by the storm-wind if it ... did not understand the noble art of turning to every wind. Heinrich Heine
The weed of crime bears bitter fruit.
The well-dressed man is he whose clothes you never notice. W. Somerset Maugham
The west wasn't won on salad. (ND Beef Council), billboard advertisement, 1990
The whisper of a pretty girl can be heard further than the roar of a lion. Arab Proberb
The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed [and hence clamorous to be led to safety] by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary. H. L. Mencken
The whole art of politics consists in directing rationally the irrationalities of men. Reinhold Niebuhr
The whole basis of the United Nations is the right of all nationsgreat or smallto have weight, to have a vote, to be attended to, to be a part of the twentieth century. Adlai E. Stevenson
The whole conviction of my life now rests upon the belief that loneliness, far from being a rare and curious phenomenon, peculiar to myself and to a few other solitary men, is the central and inevitable fact of human existence. Thomas Wolfe
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people s ofull of doubts. Bertrand Russell
The whole theory of the universe is directed unerringly to one single individual. Walt Whitman
The whole world is a tuxedo and you are a pair of brown shoes.
The whole world is about three drinks behind
The wicked work harder to reach hell than the righteous to reach heaven. Josh Billings
The wife of a careless man is almost a widow.
The wildest colts make the best steeds.
The willing contemplation of vice is vice. Arabian Proverb
The willingness to take risks is our grasp of faith. George E. Woodberry
The wind and the waves are always on the side of the ablest navigators. Edward Gibbon
The wine is good but the meat is spoiled.
The wise boldly pick up a truth as soon as they hear it. Don't wait or a moment, or you'll lose your head. Hsueh-Dou
The wise learn more from fools than fools from the wise.
The wise man does at once what the fool does finally. Baltasar Gracinn Baltasar
The wise man does not expose himself needlessly to danger, since there are few things for which he cares sufficiently; but he is willing, in great crises, to give even his lifeknowing that under certain conditions it is not worth-while to live. Aristotle
The wise man has long ears and a short tongue. German Proverb
The wise shepherd never trusts his flock to a smiling wolf.
The wisest man is generally he who thinks himself the least so. Nicolas Boileau-Despraux
The woman cries before the wedding and the man after. Polish Proverb
The woman cries before the wedding; the man afterward.
The woman who tells her age is either too young to have anything to lose or too old to have anything to gain. Chinese Proverb
The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning 'ability to,' and bics, meaning 'withstand tremendous boredom.' Dave Barry
The word today is Legs ... Spread the word.
The words we use can compound our problems.
The world abhors closeness, and all but admires extravagance; yet a slack hand shows weakness, and a tight hand strength. Thomas Fowell Buxton
The world always had the same bankrupt look, to foregoing ages as to us. Ralph Waldo Emerson
The world does not owe men a living, but business, if it is to fulfill its ideal, owes men an opportunity to earn a living. Owen D. Young
The world embarrasses me, and I cannot dream That this watch exists and has no watchmaker. Voltaire
The world gels better every daythen worse again in the evening. Kin Hubbard
The world gets better every day, then worse again in the evening.
The world has arrived at an age of cheap complex devices of great reliability, and something is bound to come of it. Vannevar Bush (1945)
The world has to learn that the actual pleasure derived from material things is of rather low quality on the whole and less even in quantity than it looks to those who have not tried it. Oliver Wendell Holmes
The world holds two classes of men: intelligent men without religion, and religious men without intelligence. Abu'l-Ala-Al-Ma'arri
The world is a beautiful book, for those who can read it.
The world is a book, and those who do not travel, read only a page. Saint Augustine
The world is a comedy to those who think, a tragedy to those who feel. Horace Walpole
The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.
The world is an 8000 mile diametre spherical pile of dirt.
The world is but a canvas to the imagination., Henry David Thoreau
The world is coming to an end  Repent and return those library books
The world is coming to an end.  Please log off.
The world is coming to an end...  SAVE YOUR BUFFERS
The world is coming to an end...  SAVE YOUR BUFFERS!!!
The world is divided into people who do things-and people who get the credit. Dwight Morrow
The world is dying for want, not of good preaching, but of good hearing. George Dana Boardman
The world is filled with willing people; some willing to work, the rest willing to let them. Robert Frost
The world is full of fools and faint hearts; and yet everyone has courage enough to bear the misfortunes, and wisdom enough to manage the affairs, of his neighbor. Benjamin Franklin
The world is full of surprises, very few of which are pleasant.
The world is governed more by appearances than by realities, so that it is fully as necessary to seem to know something as to know it. Daniel Webster
The world is like a cactus except the pricks are inside.
The world is not growing worse and it is not growing betterit is just turning around as usual. Finley Peter Dunne
The world is not to be put in order, the world is order incarnate. It is for us to put ourselves in unison eith this order. Henry Miller
The world is populated in the main by people who should not exist. George Bernard Shaw
The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be the beginning. Ivy Baker Priest
The world is run by C students. Anon.
The world is so big and so global now.
The world is so full of care and sorrow that it is a gracious debt we owe to one another to discover the bright crystals of delight hidden in somber circumstances and irksome tasks. Helen Keller
The world isn't worse.  It's just that the news coverage is so much better.
The world loves a spice of wickedness. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
The world makes up for all its follies and injustices by being damnably sentimental. Thomas Huxley
The world of politics is always twenty years behind the world of thought. John Jay Chapman
The world presents enough problems if you believe it to be a world of law and order; do not add to them by believing it to be a world of miracles. Louis D. Brandeis
The world rewards the appearance of merit oftener than merit itself. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
The world steps aside to let any man pass if he knows where he is going. David S. Jordan
The world wants to be deceived.
The world will end for those who deserve it.
The world will never starve for want of wonders, but for want of wonder. Gilbert K. Chesterton
The world's as ugly as sin, And almost as delightful | Frederick Locker-Lampson
The world's battlefields have been in the heart chiefly; more heroism has been displayed in the household and the closet, than on the most memorable battlefields in history. Henry Ward Beecher
The world's full of cactus, but you don't have to sit on it.
The world's gone to the dogs, & the fleas are in charge.
The world's great men have not commonly been great scholars, nor its great scholars great men. Oliver Wendell Holmes
The worm in the sour apple doesn't know any better.
The worst day fishing is better than the best day working.|Bumper sticker
The worst day's fishing is better than the best day's w
The worst deluded are the self-deluded. Christian Nestell Bovee
The worst feature of a new baby is its mother's singing. Kin Hubbard
The worst feeling in the world is the homesickness that comes over a man occasionally when he is at home. Ed Howe
The worst form of failure is the failure to try.
The worst hatred is that of relatives.
The worst ice cream flavor is probably squirrel.
The worst of work nowadays is what happens to people when they cease to work. Gilbert K. Chesterton
The worst part of success is to try to find someone who is happy for you. Bette Midler
The worst prison would be a closed heart.
The worst thing about censorship is [[[[[[[[[[.
The worst thing about censorship is .
The worst thing about ignorance is its insistency.
The worst vice of a fanatic is his sincerity.
The worst wheel of the cart makes the most noise. -- Poor Richard.
The worst-tempered people I've ever met were people who knew they were wrong. Wilson Mizner
The worthiest people are the most injured by slander, as is the best fruit which the birds have been pecking at. Jonathan Swift
The wrong way always seems the more reasonable.
The years betwen 50 and 70 are the hardest. You are always asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down. T S Eliot
The years of peak mental activity are undoubtedly between the ages of four and eighteen.  At four we know all the questions, at eighteen all the answers.
The young are slaves to novelty, the old to custom.
The young know the rules, the old know the exceptions.
The young leading the young, is like the blind leading the blind; 'they will both fall into the ditch.' Lord Chesterfield
The young man who has not wept is a savage, and the old man who will not laugh is a fool. George Santayana
The young wish to give their elders the full benefits of their inexperience.
The Any key ? See the one in the back marked power ?
Theater: Holding a mirror up to a keyhole.
Their are trhee things wrong here.
Their kitchen is their shrine, the cook their priest, the table their altar, and their belly their god. Charles Buck
Theirs is not to make reply, Theirs is not to reason why, Theirs is but to do and die. Alfred, Lord Tennyson
Them that can does, them that can't RTFM.
Them that has, gets.
Then a man said: Speak to us of Expectations.
Then do the pelvic thrust.
Then read from the treasured volume The poem of thy choice, And lend to the rhyme of the poet The beauty of thy voice. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Then somebody spoke, and I went into a dream....
Then you must be Don Francisco's sister
Then you must be Don Francisco's sister!
Theologians always try to turn the Bible into a book without common sense. G. C. Lichtenberg
Theology is a science of mind applied to God. Henry Ward Beecher
Theology is but our ideas of truth classified and arranged. Henry Ward Beecher
Theology is the effort to explain the unknowable in terms of the not worth knowing. H. L. Mencken
Ther's some trophy value to having artists of this magnitude. Don Passmani, lawyer for Janet Jackson, after his client signed an $80 million contract with Virgin Records, 1996
Therapy helps, but screaming obscenities is cheaper.
There IS intelligent life in the universe... It ignores us...
There ain't no such thing as a free lunch.
There are 2 ways to handle women and I know neither.
There are 3 kinds of people - those who can count & those who can't.
There are 3 kinds: those who can count, & those who can't
There are TWO 'B's in BBS, not one....
There are _no_ absolute statements.
There are a good many real miseries in life that we cannot help smiling at, but they are the smiles that make wrinkles and not dimples. Oliver Wendell Holmes
There are as many opinions as there are experts. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
There are few better measures of the concern a society has for its individual members and its own well being than the way it handles criminals. Ramsey Clark
There are few people more often in the wrong than those who cannot endure to be thought so.
There are few people who are more often in the wrong than those who cannot endure to be so. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
There are fortunes that mention the word 'umbrella' for no apparent reason.
There are four kinds of homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy ... | Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"
There are important cases in which the difference between half a heart and a whole heart makes just the difference between signal defeat and a splendid victory. A. H. K. Boyd
There are joys which long to be ours. God sends ten thousands truths, which come about us like birds seeking inlet; but we are shut up to them, and so they bring us nothing, but sit and sing awhile upon the roof, and then fly away. Henry Ward Beecher
There are many kinds of smiles, each having a distinct character. Some announce goodness and sweetness, others betray sarcasm, bitterness and pride; some soften the countenance by their languishing tenderness, others brighten by their spiritual vivacity. Johann Kaspar Lavater
There are many people today who literally do not have a close personal friend.
There are many scapegoats for our sins, but the most popular is providence. Mark Twain
There are many things I could say...
There are moments when art attains almost to the dignity of manual labor.
There are moments when everything ges well; don't be frightened, it won't last. Jules Renard
There are more bad musicians than there is bad music. Isaac Stern
There are more fools in the world than there are people. Heinrich Heine
There are more horses' asses in this world than there are horses.
There are more men ennobled by study than by nature. Cicero
There are more old drunkards than old doctors.
There are more ways into the woods than out.
There are more ways of killing a cat than choking her with cream.
There are more ways of killing a cat than choking it with cream.
There are no absolute answers to life - just revelations.
There are no answers at best a few possibly good guesses.
There are no answers, only cross references. Weiner's Law of Libraries
There are no atheists in the foxholes.
There are no athiests in foxholes. William T. Cummings
There are no exceptions to the rule that everybody likes to be an exception to the rule. Charles Osgood, journalist
There are no facts, only interpretations.
There are no giant crabs in here, Frank.
There are no greater wretches in the world than many of those whom people in general take to be happy. Seneca
There are no guarantees. From the viewpoint of fear, none are strong enough. From the viewpoint of love, none are necessary. Emmanuel
There are no mundane things outside of Buddhism, and there is no Buddhism outside of mundane things. Yuan-Wu
There are no people who are quite so vulgar as the over-refined. Mark Twain
There are no permanent changes because change itself is permanent. It behooves the industrialist to research and the investor to be vigilant. Ralph L. Woods
There are no problems we cannot solve together, and very few that we can solve by ourselves. Lyndon Baines Johnson
There are no rules of architecture for castles in the sky.
There are no skeptics in hell.
There are no such things as incurables; there are only things for which man has not found a cure. Bernard M. Baruch
There are no teachers -- only students.
There are no ugly loves, nor handsome prisons. -- Poor Richard.
There are no uninteresting things, there are only uninterested people. Gilbert K. Chesterton
There are no winners in life; only survivors.
There are none more abusive to others than they that lie most open to it themselves; but the humor goes round, and he that laughs at me today will have somebody to laugh at him tomorrow. Seneca
There are only two classes in good society in England: the equestrian class and the neurotic class. George Bernard Shaw
There are only two forces in the world, the sword and the spirit. In the long run the sword will always be conquered by the spirit. Napoleon Bonaparte
There are really not many jobs that actually require a penis or a vagina, and all other occupations should be open to everyone. | Gloria Steinem
There are several differences between a footballl game and a revolution. For one thing, a football game usually lasts longer and the participants wear uniforms. Also there are more injuries at a football game. Alfred Hitchcock
There are several good protections against temptation, but the surest is cowardice. Mark Twain
There are so many things that we wish we had done yesterday, so few that we feel like doing today. Mignon McLaughlin
There are so many upgrades, I am bankrupt.
There are some defeats more triumphant than victories. Michel de Montaigne
There are some micro-organisms that exhibit characteristics of both plants and animals.  When exposed to light they undergo photosynthesis; and when the lights go out, they turn into animals.  But then again, don't we all?
There are some strings. They're just not attached. Anonymous
There are those, I know, who will reply that the liberation of humanity, the freedom of man and mind, is nothing but a dream. They are right. It is. It is the American Dream. Archibald MacLeish
There are three kinds of lies: Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics. | Disraeli
There are three kinds of lies: Lies, damned lies and statistics.
There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and statistics. Benjamin Disraeli, statesman
There are three things I have always loved and never understood -- art, music, and women.
There are three things extremely hard: Steel, a diamond, and to know one's self.| Ben Franklin
There are three things that come next, uh four...
There are three ways to get something done: 1. Do it yourself. 	2. Hire someone to do it for you. 3. Forbid your kids to do it.
There are three ways to get something done: do it yourself, hire someone, or forbid your kids to do it.
There are three ways to get something done: do it yourself, hire someone, or forbid your kids to do it. Monta Crane
There are times when I long for a Klingon woman. | Worf
There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce. Mark Twain
There are times when parenthood seems nothing more than feeding the hand that bites you. Peter De Vries
There are two instruments worse than a clarinet.  Two clarinets.
There are two insults no human being will endure: that he has no sense of humor, and that he has never known trouble. Sinclair Lewis
There are two kinds of directors in the theater. Those who think they are God and those who are certain of it. Rhetta Hughes
There are two kinds of lightthe glow that illumines, and the glare that obscures. James Thurber
There are two kinds of men who never amount to much: those who cannot do what they are told, and those who can do nothing else. Cyrus H. Curtis
There are two kinds of solar-heat systems: "passive" systems collect the sunlight that hits your home, and "active" systems collect the sunlight that hits your neighbors' homes, too. | Dave Barry, "Postpetroleum Guzzler"
There are two sides to every question.| Protagoras(410 BC)
There are two solutions : hardware or software.
There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it and when he can. Mark Twain
There are two tragedies in life: one is to lose your heart's desire, the other is to gain it. George Bernard Shaw
There are two types of dirt: the dark kind, which is attracted to light objects, and the light kind, which is attracted to dark objects. | Slick's Law of the Universe
There are two ways of meeting difficulties. You alter the difficulties or you alter yourself to meet them. Phyllis Bottome
There are two ways of meeting difficulties: you alter the difficulties or you alter yourself meeting them. Phyllis Bottome
There are two ways to write error-free programs.  Only the third one works.
There are very few good judges of humor, and they don't agree. Josh Billings
There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives.
There are very honest people who do not think that they have had a bargain unless they have cheated a merchant. Anatole France
There are    two tragedi in life. One is not get your heart's desire. The other is to get it. George Bernard Shaw
There can be no economy where there is no efficiency. Beaconsfield
There can be no liberty unless there is economic liberty. Margaret Thatcher
There can be no rainbow without a cloud and a storm. John H. Vincent
There can be no theory of any account unless it corroborate with the theory of the earth. Walt Whitman
There can no longer be anyone too poor to vote. Lyndon Baines Johnson
There cannot be a God because if there were one, I could not believe that I was not He. Friedrich Nietzsche
There cannot be a crisis next week.  My schedule is already full. | Henry Kissinger
There cannot be a crisis next week.  My schedule is already full.| Henry Kissinger
There cannot be a crisis next week... my schedule is already full.
There cannot be a crisis today; my schedule is already full.
There goes another Sound Blaster: Snap, Crackle & Pop!
There has been an alarming increase in the number of things you know nothing about.
There has been an alarming increase in the number of things you know nothing about. Anonymous
There has never yet been a man in our history who led a life of ease whose name is worth remembering. Theodore Roosevelt
There is [sic] two things in life for which we are never fully prepared, and that istwins. Josh Billings
There is a Law that man should love his neighbor as himself. In a few years it should be as natural to mankind as breathing or the upright gait; but if he does not learn it he must perish. Alfred Adler
There is a New America every morning when we wake up. It is upon us whether we will it or not. Adlai E. Stevenson
There is a bear following you around.
There is a destiny that makes us brothers: None goes his way alone: All that we send into the lives of others Comes back onto our own. Edwin Markham
There is a difference between a tag line and a philosophy
There is a difference between an open mind and a hole in the head.
There is a fly on your Dimension
There is a fly on your Dimension!
There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of the people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.
There is a great deal of human nature in people. Mark Twain
There is a great difference between knowing and understanding: you can know a lot about something and not really understand it. Charles F. Kettering
There is a great discovery still to be made in Literature: that of paying literary men by the quantity they do NOT write.
There is a green, multi-legged creature crawling on your shoulder.
There is a healthful hardiness about real dignity that never dreads contact and communion with others however humble. Washington Irving
There is a higher form of patriotism than nationalism, and that higher form is not limited by the boundaries of one's country; but by a duty to mankind to safeguard the trust of civilization. Oscar S. Strauss
There is a land of the living and a land of the dead and the bridge is love, the only survival, the only meaning. Thornton Wilder
There is a method in man's wickedness; it grows up by degrees. Beaumont and Fletcher
There is a pinch of the madman in every great man. French Proverb
There is a real magic in enthusiasm. It spells the difference between mediocrity and accomplishment. Norman Vincent Peale
There is a secret pride in every human heart that revolts at tyranny. You may order and drive an individual, but you cannot make him respect you. William Hazlitt
There is a significant Latin proverb; to wit: Who will guard the guards? Josh Billings
There is a skeleton in every old house.
There is a sort of charm in ugliness, if the person has some redeeming qualities and is only ugly enough. Josh Billings
There is a theory that states: "If anyone finds out what the universe is for it will disappear and be replaced by something more bazaarly inexplicable."
There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.  There is another theory which states that this has already happened. | Donald Adams, "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"
There is a time for all things, a time to preach and a time to pray, but those times have passed away. There is a time to fight, and that time has now come. Peter Muhlenberg
There is a time in every man's education when he arrives at the conviction that envy is ignorance; that imitation is suicide. Ralph Waldo Emerson
There is a tiny plant here, murmuring "water, water".
There is a vas deferens between men and women.
There is a violence that liberates, and a violence that enslaves; there is a violence that is moral and a violence that is immoral. Benito Mussolini
There is a way to look at the past. Don't hide from it. It will not catch you - if you don't repeat it. Pearl Bailey
There is a woman at the begining of all great things. Alphonse de Lamartine
There is a young and impresionable mind out there that is hungry for information. It has latched on to an electronic tube as its main source of nourishment. Joan Ganz Cooney
There is always a way, and it usually doesn't work.
There is always an easier way to do it !
There is always an easier way to do it.
There is always free cheese in a mousetrap.
There is always inequity in life. Some men are killed in a war, and some men are wounded, and some men are stationed in the Antarctic and some are stationed in San Francisco. It's very hard in military or personal life to assure complete equality. Lif John Fitzgerald Kennedy
There is always one moment in childhood when the door opens and lets the future in. Grahm Greene, from The Power and the Glory
There is always one more bug.
There is always someone worse off than yourself.
There is always something new out of Africa.
There is an easy answer to your problem that is neat, plausible, and wrong.
There is an exception to all laws.
There is an exception to every rule, except this one.
There is an exception to every rule.
There is another theory that states: "This has already happened ...." | Donald Adams, "Hitch-Hikers Guide to the Galaxy"
There is as much difference between the counsel that a friend giveth, and that a man giveth himself, as there is between the counsel of a friend and a flatterer. Francis Bacon
There is as much greatness of mind in acknowledging a good turn, as in doing it. Seneca
There is but one easy place in this world, and that is the grave. Henry Ward Beecher
There is danger in delaying, good fortune in acting.
There is danger when a man throws his tongue into high gear before he gets his brain a-going. C. C. Phelps
There is enough for all. The earth is a generous mother; she will provide in plentiful abundance food for all her children if they will but cultivate her soil in justice and in peace. Bourke Coekran
There is gravity in wisdom, but no particular wisdom in gravity. Josh Billings
There is hardly anything in the world that some man cannot make a little worse and sell a little cheaper. John Ruskin
There is intelligent life on Earth, but we are just visiting
There is life after death: in Cleveland, people are still allowed to vote.
There is luxury in self-reproach. When we blame ourselves, we feel no one else has a right to blame us. Oscar Wilde ACADEME, n. An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Ambrose Bierce
There is many a good man to be found under a shabby hat.
There is more difference within the sexes, than between them.| Ivy Compton-Burnett
There is more to reality than meets the eye
There is much Obi-Wan did not tell you.
There is much Obiwan did not tell you.
There is much difference between imitating a good man and counterfeiting him. Benjamin Franklin
There is much to be said for failure.  It is more interesting than success.
There is neither heaven nor earth, only snow, falling incessantly. Hashin
There is never jealousy where there is not strong regard. Washington Irving
There is never sunshine without shadow.
There is never time to do it right, but always time to do it over.
There is new strength, repose of mind, and inspiration in fresh apparel. Ella Wheeler Wilcox
There is news.
There is no "A" in "KERNEL"
There is no "A" in "KERNEL"!
There is no Democratic or Republican way of cleaning the streets. Fiorello La Guardia
There is no God! He just thinks he's there!
There is no X in ESPRESSO.
There is no absurdity so palpable but that it may be firmly planted in the human head if you only begin to inculcate it before the age of five, by constantly repeating it with an air of great solemnity. Arthur Schopenhauer
There is no accounting for tastes Proverb
There is no adequate defense, except stupidity, against the impact of a new idea. P. W. Bridgman
There is no advancement to him who stands trembling because he cannot see the end from the beginning. E. J. Klemme
There is no bad beer: some kinds are better than others
There is no benefit in the gifts of a bad man.  | Euripides
There is no better looking-glass than an old friend.
There is no bigotry like that of 'free thought' run to seed. Horace Greeley
There is no calamity which a great nation can invite which equals that which follows a supine submission to wrong and injustice. Grover Cleveland
There is no conversation more boring than the one where everybody agrees. Michel de Montaigne
There is no cosmetic for beauty like happiness. Countess of Blessington
There is no covert agency watching you. Everyone is watching you!
There is no dark side of the moon.  Really.
There is no defense except stupidity against a new idea.
There is no den in the wide world to hide a rogue. Commit a crime and the earth is made of glass. Ralph Waldo Emerson
There is no dependence that can be sure but a dependence upon one's self. John Gay
There is no devil; it's God when he's drunk.
There is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress. | Mark Twain
There is no faculty of the human soul so persistent and universal as that of hatred. Henry Ward Beecher
There is no failure except in no longer trying. There is no defeat except from within, no really insurmountable barrier save our own inherent weakness of purpose. Kin Hubbard
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear.
There is no feeling, except the extremes of fear and grief, that does not find relief in music. George Eliot
There is no fire like passion, there is no shark like hatred, there is no snare like folly, there is no torrent like greed. Buddha
There is no flying without wings. French Proverb
There is no fool like an old fool.
There is no fool like an old fool.  | J.Heywood (1497-1580)
There is no gravity, the Earth sucks.
There is no gravity--The earth sucks
There is no gravity. The Earth sucks.
There is no greater grief than to remember days of joy when misery is at hand. Dante
There is no greater sign of a general decay of virtue in a nation, than a want of zeal in its inhabitants for the good of their country. Joseph Addison
There is no grief like the grief that does not speak. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
There is no grief which time does not lessen and soften.
There is no happiness where there is no wisdom. | Sophocles
There is no heavier burden than a great potential.
There is no index so sure as the voice. Tancred
There is no instinct like that of the heart. Lord Byron
There is no little enemy. Benjamin Franklin
There is no man living that can not do more than he thinks he can. Henry Ford
There is no man so blind as he who will not see.
There is no more independence in politics than there is in jail. Will Rogers
There is no more miserable human being than one in whom nothing is habitual but indecision. William James
There is no one subsists by himself alone. Owen Felltham
There is no pillow so soft as a clear conscience. French Proverb
There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it. Mary Wilson Little
There is no real wealth but the labor of man. Percy Bysshe Shelley
There is no realizable power that man cannot, in time, fashion the tools to attain, nor any power so secure that the naked ape will not abuse it.  So it is written in the genetic cards -- only physics and war hold him in check.  And also the wife who wants him home by five, of course. | Encyclopadia Apocryphia, 1990 ed.
There is no remedy for fun but more fun!
There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness. Josh Billings
There is no royal road to geometry.
There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist, except an old optimist. Mark Twain
There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.
There is no satisfaction in hanging a man who does not object to it | G. B. Shaw
There is no security on earth; there is only opportunity. Gen. Douglas MacArthur
There is no security on this earth.  There is only opportunity.
There is no self-delusion more fatal than that which makes the conscience dreamy with the anodyne of lofty sentiments, while the life is groveling and sensual. James Russell Lowell
There is no sense in crying over spilt milk. Sophocles
There is no sin except stupidity. Oscar Wilde
There is no sterner moralist than pleasure. Lord Byron
There is no substitute for good manners, except, perhaps, fast reflexes.
There is no such thing as a "Fail Safe" design.
There is no such thing as a little garlic.
There is no such thing as a nonpolitical speech by a politician. Richard M. Nixon
There is no such thing as an inevitable war. If war comes it will be from failure of human wisdom. Andrew B. Law
There is no such thing as an innocent purchaser of stocks. Louis D. Brandeis
There is no such thing as an underestimate of average intelligence. Henry Adams
There is no such thing as bravery; only degrees of fear.
There is no such thing as justicein or out of court. Clarence Darrow
There is no such thing as pure pleasure; some anxiety always goes with it.
There is no such thing as security. There never has been. Germaine Greer
There is no such uncertainty as a sure thing. Robert Burns
There is no time like the pleasant.
There is no time like the present for postponing what you ought to be doing.
There is no time like the present to postpone what you ought to be doing.
There is no tyrant like custom, and no freedom where its edicts are not resisted. Christian Nestell Bovee
There is no use whatever trying to help people who do not help themselves. You cannot push anyone up a ladder unless he be willing to climb himself. Andrew Carnegie
There is no vaccine against stupidity.
There is no worse lie than a truth misunderstood by those who hear it. William James
There is nobody so irritating as somebody with less intelligence and more sense than we have. Don Herold
There is nobody who is not dangerous for someone. Marquise de Svign
There is not gravity.  The earth sucks.
There is not, in my opinion, anything more mysterious in nature than this instinct in animals, which thus rise above reason, and yet fall infinitely short of it. Joseph Addison
There is nothing certain in a man's life but that he must lose it. Owen Meredith
There is nothing enduring in life for a woman except what she builds in a man's heart. Judith Anderson
There is nothing hidden between Heaven and Earth Venezuelan Proverb
There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it's going to be a butterfly. Buckminster Fuller
There is nothing more imprudent than excessive prudence. Charles Caleb Colton
There is nothing more silly than a silly laugh.
There is nothing new under the sun. Ecclesiastes 1:9
There is nothing on earth divine except humanity. Walter S. Landor
There is nothing rarer than the ability to recognise ability.| Robert Half
There is nothing so absurd or ridiculous that has not at some time been said by some philosopher. Oliver Goldsmith
There is nothing so aggravating as a fresh boy who is too old to ignore and too young to kick. Kin Hubbard
There is nothing so easy that it becomes difficult when done with reluctance.
There is nothing so small that it can't be blown out of proportion.
There is nothing so stupid as an educated man, if you get off the thing that he was educated in. Will Rogers
There is nothing so useless as doing effeciently that which should not be done at all. Anon. Remember that the faith that moves mountains always carries a pick. Anonymous
There is nothing that strengthens a nation like reading of a nation's own history, whether that history is recorded in books or embodied in customs, institutions and monuments. Joseph Anderson
There is nothing that wastes the body like worry, and one who has any faith in God should be ashamed to worry about anything whatsoever. Mahatma Gandhi
There is nothing too little for so little a creature as man. It is by studying little things that we attain the great art of having as little misery and as much happiness as possible. Samuel Johnson
There is one God, but which one is He?
There is one body that knows more than anybody, and that is everybody. Alexandre de Talleyrand-Prigord
There is one in every crowd, and they always find me.|Bumper sticker
There is one rule for politicians all over the world: Don't say in Power what you say in opposition; if you do, you only have to carry out what the other fellows have found impossible. John Galsworthy, English author
There is one rule for the industrialist and that is: Make the best quality of goods possible at the lowest cost possible, paying the highest wages possible. Henry Ford
There is one single fact which we may oppose to all the wit and argument of infidelity, namely, that no man ever repented of being a Christian on his death bed. Hannah More
There is one sure way of telling when politicians aren't telling the truth - their lips move. Felicity Kendall
There is one thing stronger than all the armies in the world, and that is an idea whose time has come. Victor Hugo
There is one thing stronger than all the armies in the world, and that is an idea whose time has come.| Victor Hugo
There is only one greater folly than that of the fool who says in his heart there is no God, and that is the folly of the people that says with its head that it does not know whether there is a God or not. Otto von Bismarck
There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved. George Sand
There is only one rule for being a good talker - learn to listen. Christopher Morley
There is only one sort of love, but there are a thousand copies. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
There is only one success ... to be able to spend your life in your own way, and not to give others absurd maddening claims upon it. Christopher Morley
There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about. | Oscar Wilde
There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.| Oscar Wilde
There is only one universal passion: fear.
There is only one way to come into this world; there are too many ways to leave it. Donald Harington
There is only one way to kill capitalism--by taxes, taxes, and more taxes.
There is plenty of law at the end of a nightstick. Grover A. Whalen
There is so much good in the worst of us, an so much bad in the best of us, that it behooves all of us not to talk about the rest of us. Robert Louis Stevenson
There is so much good in the worst of us, and so much bad in the best of us, that it hardly becomes any one of us to talk about the rest of us. Anon.
There is something fascinating about science.  One gets such wholesale returns of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of fact. | Mark Twain
There is something peculiarly sinister and insidious in even a charge of disloyalty. Such a charge all too frequently places a strain on the reputation of an individual which is indelible and lasting, regardless of the complete innocence later proved. John Lord O'Brian
There is something that is much more scarce, something finer far, something rarer than ability. It is the ability to recognize ability. Elbert Hubbard
There is something to be said about me: "Wow!!"
There is such a thing as a nation being so right that it does not need to convince others by force that it is right. Woodrow Wilson
There is this paradox in prideit makes some men ridiculous, but prevents others from becoming so. Charles Caleb Colton
There is thy gold; worse poison to men's souls, Doing more murther in this loathsome world, Than these poor compounds that thou mayst not sell: William Shakespeare
There is very little future in being right when your boss is wrong.
There is wickedness in the intention of wickedness, even though it be not perpetrated in the act. Cicero
There isn't much to be seen in a little town, but what you hear makes up for it. Kin Hubbard
There isn't room enough in this dress for both of us.
There never was a good knife made of bad steel.
There once was a [ ] from [ ] whose [ ] was
There once was a girl named Irene Who lived on distilled kerosene But she started absorbin' A new hydrocarbon And since then has never benzene.
There once was an old man from Esser, Who's knowledge grew lesser and lesser. It at last grew so small, He knew nothing at all, And now he's a College Professor.
There ought to be one day - just one - where there is open season on senators. Will Rogers
There was a young lady from Hyde Who ate a green apple and died. While her lover lamented The apple fermented And made cider inside her inside.
There was a young poet named Dan, Whose poetry never would scan. When told this was so, He said, "Yes, I know. It's because I try to put every possible syllable into that last line that I can."
There was never a good war, or a bad peace. Benjamin Franklin
There was never an angry man that thought his anger unjust. St. Francis De Sales
There was no respect for youth when I was young, and now that I am old, there is no respect for ageI missed it coming and going. J. B. Priestly
There was one who thought himself above me, and he was above me until he had that thought. Elbert Hubbard
There will always be some delightful mysteries in your life.
There will always be speculation of some kind. If you throw it out of an organized exchange, you throw it out into the street. H. C. Emery
There will be big changes for you but you will be happy.
There will be no last bus tonight.
There will be vice as long as there are men. Tacitus
There wouldn't be such a thing as counterfeit gold if there were no real gold somewhere. Sufi Proverb
There's ALWAYS one more bug.
There's a dead bishop on the landing!
There's a fine line between courage and foolishness. Too bad its not a fence.
There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot. Steven Wright
There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an idiot. Stephen Wright
There's a helluva distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words. Dorothy Parker
There's a hot place with pitchforks waiting.
There's a killer on the road; his brain is squirming like a toad.| Jim Morrison
There's a lady who knows, all that glitters is gold.| Led Zeppelin
There's a little truth in all jive, and a little jive in all truth. Leonard Q. Barnessss. Barnes
There's a lot of people in this world who spend so much time watching their health that they haven't the time to enjoy it. Josh Billings
There's a lot to be said for the fellow who doesn't say it himself. Maurice Switzer
There's a magical tie to the land of our home, which the heart cannot break, though the footsteps may roam. Eliza Cook
There's a pizza place near where I live that sells only slices. in the back you can see a guy tossing a triangle in the air. Stephen Wright
There's a proud modesty in merit; averse from asking, and resolved to pay ten times the gifts it asks. John Dryden
There's a sucker born every minute. P. T. Barnum
There's a whole lifetime stretching ahead of me
There's alway one more bug.
There's always 1 more SOB than you counted on
There's always 1 more SOB than you counted on.
There's always one more bug. Lubarsky's Law of Cybernetic Entomology
There's always one more bug.| Programmer's Law
There's an Italian in my room and he won't go away
There's an Italian in my room and he won't go away!
There's an exception to every rule, except this one.
There's an old proverb that says just about whatever you want it to.
There's an old proverb that says just about whatever you want it to. Anonymous
There's an old story about the person who wished his computer were as easy to use as his telephone. That wish has come true, since I no longer know how to use my telephone. Anonymous
There's at least one fool in every married couple.
There's got to be more to life than compile-and-go.
There's more planes in the ocean than ships in the sky!
There's more than one answer to these questions...
There's more than one way to skin a cat Proverb
There's more to BBSing than meets the modem.
There's never time to do it right, but always time to do it over.
There's no Walter Cronkite to give you the final word each evening. William Weld, MA governor, Babson College Graduation, 1995
There's no fool like an old fool, 'cause he's experienced.
There's no future in time travel.
There's no future in time travel. Anonymous
There's no intelligent life down here.
There's no place like home Proverb
There's no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes. | Dr. Who
There's no point in being grown up if you can't be childish sometimes.| Dr. Who
There's no real need to do housework -- after four years it doesn't get any worse.
There's no room in the drug world for amateurs.
There's no sense being pessimistic, it wouldn't work anyway.
There's no skeletons in my closet!
There's no substitute for cubic inches.| Peter Brock
There's no such thing as Paranoia; they really ARE out to get you!
There's none so blind as they that won't see. Jonathan Swift
There's nothing more demoralizing than money.   | Sophocles
There's nothing more restful than taking orders from fools.
There's nothing so comfortable as a small bankroll. A big one is always in danger. Wilson Mizner
There's nothing wrong with my keyboard. There's n&%)$^%@!
There's nothing wrong with the average person that a good psychiatrist can't exaggerate. Toronto Star Newspaper
There's one in every car... You'll see.
There's one thing to be said for inviting trouble: it generally accepts. May Maloo
There's only one thing worth being remebered for... Everything!!
There's only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is I'll get married again. | Clint Eastwood
There's only two kind's of music - Country & Western
There's safety in numbers/When you learn to divide.
There's safety in numbers: F16, F11, B2, F15....
There's small choice in rotten apples.
There's so much plastic in this culture that vinyl leopard skin is becoming an endangered synthetic. | Lily Tomlin
There's so much to learn and so much of it not worth learning.
There's so much to say but your eyes keep interrupting me.
There's somthing inside your head...
Therefore trust to thy heart, and to what the world calls illusions. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Thereisonlysomuchyoucansayusingjustfiftyletters.
Theres never time to do it right, only time to do it over.
Thesaurus....ancient reptile with excellent vocabulary.
Thesaurus: ancient reptile with an excellent vocabulary.
These are DARK TIMES for all mankind's HIGHEST VALUES These are DARK TIMES for FREEDOM and PROSPERITY These are GREAT TIMES to put your money on BAD GUY to kick the CRAP out of MEGATON MAN
These are my new shoes. They're good shoes. They won't make you rich like me, they won't make you rebound like me, they definitely won't make you handsome like me. They'll only make you have shoes like me. That's it. Charles Barkley, basketball player, in a commercial for basketball shoes, 1993
These are serious charges. Spock STV
These are the times that try men's souls. Thomas Paine
These aren't my shorts -- they bend
These cookies don't taste anything like girl scouts!
These days govt. is a four letter word.
These days the necessities of life cost you about three times what they used to, and half the time they aren't even fit to drink.
These guys from the nation's capitol, now they do a lot of thinking. George Foreman, refering to boxers from D.C., not politicians, 1996
These hemorrhoids are a pain in the neck!
These people have served a longer sentence than some people who have committed murder. Jeff Greenfield, news analyst, describing the jury in the OJ Simpson murder trial, 1995
These things on my nose aren't just for show. | Ro
These times of ours are serious and full of calamity, but all times are essentially alike. As soon as there is life there is danger. Ralph Waldo Emerson
These violent delights have violent ends. William Shakespeare
They *blinded* me with Science!
They DO make 'em like they used to.
They all look the same at 2 A.M.
They also serve who only stand and wait.
They also serve who only stand and wait. John Milton
They also surf who only stand on waves.
They always talk who never think, and who have the least to say. Matthew Prior
They are able because they think they are able. Vergil
They are like the clue in the labyrinth, or the compass in the night. Joseph Joubert
They are never alone who are accompanied by noble thoughts. Philip Sidney
They are slaves who fear to speak for the fallen & weak.
They aren't evil...just stupid.
They asked me to go in front of the Reagans.  I'm not used to going in front of President Reagan, so we went out behind the Bushes.| Dan Quayle
They blew the Bronx away. . .
They can conquer who believe they can. Vergil
They can't fire me : slaves have to be sold !
They have been at a great feast of languages, and stolen the scraps.
They have sown the wind, and they shall reap the whirlwind. Hosea: 8:7
They invented the vaccine to Polio before they invented the cure.
They just buzzed and buzzed.....buzzed.
They never fail who die in a great cause. Lord Byron
They spell it "da Vinci" and pronounce it "da Vinchy".  Foreigners always spell better than they pronounce. | Mark Twain
They take the paper and they read the headlines. So they've heard of unemployment and
They talk of the dignity of work. Bosh. The dignity is in leisure. Herman Melville
They that are on their guard and appear ready to receive their adversaries, are in much less danger of being attacked than the supine, secure and negligent. Benjamin Franklin
They told me I was gullible ... and I believed them!
They who drink beer will think beer.
They who give have all things; they who withhold have nothing.
They whose sole bliss is eating can give but that one brutish reason why they live. Juvenal
They'd never (be stupid enough to) make him a manager.| Famous last words
They're baaack
They're only trying to make me LOOK paranoid
They're treating him like elvis. Eddie Davis, banjo player, describing crowd reaction to Woody Allen's clarinet playing during a European tour, 1996
They've played their hearts out.
Thin may be in, but fat's where it's at
Thin may be in, but fat's where it's at!
Things are certainly looking up.
Things are going very well on the whole.
Things are more like they are now than they ever have been before.
Things are more like they used to be than they are now.
Things are not always what they seem.
Things are not always what they seem., Phaedrus
Things are not as bad as they seem - they're worse
Things are not as bad as they seem. They are worse.
Things are seldom what they seem; skim milk masquerades as cream.
Things don't change, but by and by our wishes change. Marcel Proust
Things don't turn up in this world until somebody turns them up. James A. Garfield
Things equal to nothing else are equal to each other.
Things get worse under pressure.
Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle. Abraham Lincoln
Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.| Abraham Lincoln
Things past redress and now with me past care.
Things that make you go, "HMMMMMmmmmmmmmmm . . .?"
Things will be bright in P.M.  A cop will shine a light in your face.
Things will be brighter tonight.  A cop will shine a light in your face.
Things won are done, joy's soul lies in the doing. William Shakespeare
Things won't get any better, so get used to it.
Things work better if you plug them in.
Things work better when plugged in.
Things worth having are worth cheating for.
Think ! It may hurt, but it pays off over time.
Think ! While it's still legal !
Think "HONK" if you're a telepath
Think Stupidly.  Act Globally.
Think big.  Pollute the Mississippi.
Think carefully before wishing, it might just come true.
Think hard about it: I'm running out of demons. I'm running out of villians. I'm down to Castro and Kim Il Sung. Colin Powell, US general and chairman of joint chiefs of staff, 1991
Think highly of yourself, for the world takes you at your own estimate. Anonymous
Think honk if you're a telepath.
Think how many blameless lives are brightened by the blazing indiscretions of other people. Saki
Think it over, creep.| Robocop
Think like a man of action and act like a man of thought. Henri Bergson
Think like a man of action, act like a man of thought.
Think like a wise man but communicate in the language of the people. William Butler Yeats
Think much, speak little, and write less.
Think not forever of yourselves, O Chiefs, nor of your own generation. Think of continuing generations of our families, think of our grandchildren and of those yet unborn, whose faces are coming from beneath the ground. Peacemaker, founder of the Iriquois Confederacy, ca. 1000 AD
Think of it  With VLSI we can pack 100 ENIACs in 1 sq. cm.
Think of it as evolution in action.
Think of your family tonight.  Try to crawl home after the computer crashes.
Think twice before speaking, but don't say "think think click click".
Think twice before speaking.  But don't say "think think click click".
Think twice before speaking. But don't say "think think click click".
Think twice before you speak to a friend in need. Ambrose Bierce
Think where man's glory most begins and ends, And say my glory was I had such friends. William Butler Yeats
Think with the wise, but talk with the vulgar. Greek Proverb
Think you're confused now ? Try using EZ-Reader w/ EDLIN!
Think!  It may hurt, but it pays off over time.
Think!  While it's still legal!!
Thinking is more interesting that knowing but less interesting than looking.
Thinking is wise, planning is better, doing is best.
Thinking must be hard work because not many people do it
Thinking quickly Spock opens a can of peas with his ears.
Thinly sliced cabbage.
Third of Five, six of one, half a dozen of the other
This     tagline     is      justified     .
This Charlie Brown must have been a very wise man.
This MSG created by pouring warm tea on a Ouiji board.
This Tag Line no verb.
This Tag line is self referencing !
This Tagline Under Surveillance by the Pinkerton Agency !
This Tagline brought to you by Intelligence INC.
This Tagline for Sale.
This Tagline is Death-Trapped. Stay Away !
This Tagline is for sale.  Call 1-800-TAG-THIS!
This Tagline will self-destruct in 5 seconds!
This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man. William Shakespeare
This afternoon is favorable for romance.  Try a single person for a change.
This ain't no party This ain't no disco This ain't no foolin' around
This ain't no party! This ain't no disco! This ain't no foolin' around!
This ain't no party, this ain't no disco..
This building is so high, the elevator shows movies.
This calls for a celebration.
This case may also be notable for the chutzpah of the Assistant United States Attorney in advancing as a reason for striking a juror that, 'I have a P rule, I never accept anyone whose occupation begins with a P. He is a pipeline operator.' This is Legal Opinion
This computer is taking over my life !
This contract doesn't include a Sanity Clause. Everyone knows, there ain't no Sanity Clause.| Groucho Marx
This cookie is void where prohibited, licensed, or taxed.
This country cannot afford to be materially rich and spiritually poor. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. Will Rogers
This does not exist.
This election is about who's going to be the next President of the United States | Senator Dan Quayle
This end down, not up, Stupid!
This fellow's wise enough to play the fool.
This fortune cookie program out of order.
This fortune every third, but it still comprehensible.
This fortune intentionally left blank.
This fortune intentionally not included.
This fortune is false.
This fortune is inoperative.  Please try another.
This fortune is owned and operated by Frobazz Magic Co., Ltd.
This fortune screensaver will seld destruct in 5 seconds. One.. Two... Three...
This fortune will not come true.
This game is exceedingly simple. | Data
This guy has blown me off for the last time. | Geordi
This has been a remarkably successful week.
This heroism at command, this senseless violence, this accursed bombast of patriotismhow intensely I despise them! Albert Einstein
This hitteth the nail on the head. | J. Heywood (1597-1580)
This information fills a much needed gap
This information fills a much needed gap.
This institution will be based on the illimitable freedom of the human mind. For here we are not afraid to follow truth wherever it may lead, not tolerate error as long as reason is left free to combat it. Thomas Jefferson
This is Elvis. Any messages for me?
This is NOT Burger King.  You do not get it YOUR way.
This is New York, and there's no law against being annoying. William Kunstler, lawyer, 1994
This is X Insurance Co - How May I Shaft You?
This is a BRAG line, and I'm proud of it!
This is a Ferengi Tagline.  You owe me 500 credits for re\SLMR\TAG
This is a Moving Message.
This is a Tagline mirror><rorrim enilgaT a si sihT
This is a copy of a completely original tagline.
This is a good day for overcoming obstacles.  Try a steeplechase.
This is a good day to let down old friends who need help.
This is a good time to punt work.
This is a hell of a time for a walk in the park. | Geordi
This is a stolen tagline.
This is a test of the EBS. This is ONLY a test.
This is a youth-oriented society, and the joke is on them because youth is a disease from which we all recover. Dorothy Fuldheim
This is abuse. Arguments are down the hall.
This is an airlock, Allow me to demonstrate  Worf
This is an egg. This is a frying pan. Any questions ?
This is an evaluation copy. OK, so I'm taking my time ...
This is an ex-parrot!
This is express written consent of Major League Baseball.
This is for all ill-treated fellows Unborn and unbegot, For them to read when they're in trouble And I am not. | A. E. Housman
This is heavy stuff for a Thursday!
This is it. There are no hidden meanings. All that mystical stuff is just what's so. Werner Erhard
This is my tagline and you can't have it.
This is not an abandoned vehicle.|Bumper sticker
This is not what you think.
This is one of my most creative periods ever.
This is our only tag line.
This is pretty exciting for a Thursday!!
This is the best book ever written by any man on the wrong side of a question of which he is profoundly ignorant. Thomas B. Macaulay
This is the best of all possible worlds.
This is the day for firm decisions  Or is it?
This is the day for firm decisions!  Or is it?
This is the devilish thing about foreign affairs: they are foreign and will not always conform to our whims. James Reston
This is the essential evil of vice, that it debases man. Edwin Hubbel Chapin
This is the final test of a gentleman: his respect for those who can be of no possible service to him. William Lyon Phelps
This is the light at the end of the tunnel.
This is the offcial tagline of the Sydney 2000 Olympics!
This is the only place in the world where you can do this. The little guy who dosen't have a lot of money can still come here and start up a campain. We give the same courtesy to the Hemp Lady as to Bob Dole. New Hampshire Secretary of State, where anyone with $1,000 can enter the Presidential Primary
This is the tagline to end all taglines.
This is the true joy in life, being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; being a force of nature instead of a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy. George Bernard Shaw, from Man and Superman
This is the very perfection of a man, to find out his own imperfections. Saint Augustine
This is the way the world ends ... Not with a bang but with a whimper. T. S. Eliot
This is your brain.  Postscript on brain your is This.
This is your brain: .   This is my brain: O   Any questions?
This is your modem on drugs!
This is your pizza. Ƹ$   !zz ً޻ $
This is your sysop. ôs s ou ssop  ug !
This isn't a holodeck, darling, this is real. | O'Brien
This isn't a tag line. It just looks like one.
This isn't a tag, it's the message.
This isn't a tagline, but it plays one on TV
This isn't hell, but I can see it from here.
This isn't right.  This isn't even wrong.
This line intentionally left blank.
This line intentionally left unjustified.
This login session:  $13.99
This login session: $13.99, but for you $11.88
This login session: $13.99, but for you $11.88.
This man shouldn't be dead. I can't find anything wrong with him.-McCoy
This message cleared by Iraqi censors.
This message is $hareWare ! To register, please send $20 !
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This message was typed on recycled phosphorous.
This message was typed on recycled phosphorus.
This message will self destruct in 5 seconds...5..4..3..2
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This message written by Dolphin Boy.
This message written by Sandy. A highly trained dolphin.
This message written by Zippy the Dolphin.
This meszage has bin spel chequed.
This mind intentionally left blank.
This never would've happened if I were captain. | Riker
This night methinks is but the daylight sick.
This open hand of desire wants everything.
This organization is created to prevent you from going to hell. It isn't created to take you to heaven. Henry Cabot Lodge
This paperback is very interesting, but I find it will never replace a hardcover book - it makes a very poor doorstop. Alfred Hitchcock
This parrot is bleeding demised. It is an ex - parrot | John Cleese
This parrot wouldn't move if you put 4 thousand volts through it!
This phone is baroque ; please call Bach later.
This place has everything.
This portion of UTS II is a trade secret of Amdahl Corporation.
This president is going to lead us out of this recovery. It will happen. | Vice President Dan Quayle
This product was cruelly tested on small, furry animals.
This program makes me look like a genius.
This score just in - Deep Space 9, Babylon 5.
This sentance has threee errors.
This sentence contains ten words, eighteen syllables, and sixty-four letters.
This sentence is a  premature punctuator
This sentence no verb.
This side up
This space available for advertizing.
This space for rent
This space left blankish.
This started off as a father-daughter adventure, and it's gotten wonderfully out of hand...I'm going to fly till I die. Jessica Dubroff, 7 year old American pilot, speaking prophetically to the Times of London, before her fatal plane crash, 1996
This system will self-destruct in five minutes.
This table has four legs. A table with a broken leg remains a table. But a table from which the four legs have been removed becomes only a flat piece of wood. At what moment did it cease to be a table? Carlo Suares
This tag brought to you by...they keep going and
This tag has been stolen 1 time(s).
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This tagline Copyright (c) 1992 -- All rights reserved.
This tagline Copyright (c) 1993 All rights reserved. :-)
This tagline Copyright 1991 (C) All rights reserved. :-)
This tagline also stolen by Silly Little Mail Reader!
This tagline can't be stolen. Call 555-1234. Tagbusters!
This tagline cancelled due to lack of interest
This tagline contains a virus -- DO NOT READ !
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This tagline invisible to all whose I.Q. exceeds mine.
This tagline is $hareWare! To register, please send $20
This tagline is SHAREWARE!  To Register, send me $10.
This tagline is Serial # 2377/AFR-1104.991
This tagline is Serial #0609-1960/MCE-LNi8u
This tagline is identical to the one you are reading.
This tagline is indecipherable !
This tagline is not sponsored by Pepsi in any way.
This tagline is self referencing !
This tagline is shareware - to register send $45 to me.
This tagline is umop apisdn
This tagline is umop apisdn (Spaszoid Strikes!)
This tagline is umop apisdn.
This tagline is under repair. Thank you.
This tagline no verb.
This tagline not sponsored by Pepsi in any way.
This tagline protected by an attack cat.
This tagline self-destructs when U <ENTER>
This tagline stolen by Silly Little Mail Reader
This tagline utterly lacks class, but is very cute.
This tagline was created from many little letters.
This tagline was missing, so I filled something in...
This tagline was never here.
This tagline was reclaimed and is not yet stolen.
This thing doesn't compile in time.  Need a new Pentium-II.
This time, like all times, is a very good one, if we but know what to do with it. Ralph Waldo Emerson
This time, like all times, is a very good one, if we but know what to do with it. Ralph Waldo Emerson, philosopher
This unit ... must ... survive.
This war in Vietnam is, I believe, a war for civilization. Certainly it is not a war of our seeking. It is a war thrust upon us and we cannot yield to tyranny. Francis Cardinal Spellman
This was the most unkindest cut of all.
This would easier understand fewer had ommitted.
This  tagline has  a lot of  bugs in  it ...
Those of you who think they know everything, are very annoying to those of us who do
Those of you who think you know everything are annoying those of us who do.
Those only deserve a monument who do not need one. William Hazlitt
Those wanting wit affect gravity, and go by the name of solid men. John Dryden
Those who are prepared to die for any cause are seldom defeated. Jawaharlal Nehru
Those who are prospering do not argue about taxes.
Those who begin coercive elimination of dissent soon find themselves exterminating dissenters. Compulsory unification of opinion achieves only the unanimity of the graveyard. Felix Frankfurter
Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves. James Matthew Barrie
Those who can -- do.
Those who can't -- teach.
Those who can't teach administrate.
Those who can't teach consult.
Those who can't teach, teach gym.
Those who can't write, write manuals.
Those who can, Do. Those who can't, Criticize.
Those who can, do.  Those who can't, simulate.
Those who can, do.  Those who can't, supervise
Those who can, do.  Those who can't, supervise!
Those who can, do.  Those who can't, teach.  Those who can't teach, hack.
Those who can, do.  Those who can't, teach.  Those who can't teach, teach gym.
Those who can, do.  Those who can't, write.
Those who can, do; those who can't, teach; and those who can't teach, teach teachers.
Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it. George Santayana
Those who commit injustice bear the greatest burden. Hosea Ballou
Those who deny freedom to others deserve it not for themselves, and, under a just God, cannot long retain it. Abraham Lincoln
Those who do the most usually demand the least.
Those who don't know how to weep with their whole heart, don't know how to laugh either. Golda Meir
Those who expect to reap the blessings of freedom, must, like men, undergo the fatigues of supporting it. Thomas Paine
Those who fought for it know the true taste of freedom.
Those who have free seats at a play hiss first. Chinese Proverb
Those who hope for no other life are dead even for this. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Those who in quarrels interpose must often wipe a bloody nose.
Those who in quarrels interpose, Must often wipe a bloody nose. John Gay
Those who know don't say and those who say don't know.
Those who know me, despise me.
Those who like sausages or political policy should not watch it being made.
Those who live by the nit, die by the nit
Those who live by the sword KILL those who don't.
Those who live to the future must always appear selfish to those who live to the present. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable.| John F. Kennedy
Those who misremember the past are pleased to repreat it as 'proof.' Mike Huybensz
Those who never retract their opinions love themselves more than they love truth. Joseph Joubert
Those who profess to favor freedom, and yet depreciate agitation, are men who want rain without thunder and lightning. They want the ocean without the roar of its many waters. Frederick Douglass
Those who sleep with dogs will rise with fleas. Italian Proverb
Those who talk don't know.  Those who don't talk, know.
Those who think they know it all upset those of us who do.
Those who work most for the world's advancement are the ones who demand least. Henry Doherty
Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety. Benjamin Franklin
Those whom God wishes to destroy, are first made mad.
Those whom the gods would destroy they first call 'promising.' Jan Carew
Those without heads do not need hats.
Thou hast seen nothing yet.
Thou know'st the o'er-eager vehemence of youth, How quick in temper, and in judgement weak. Homer
Thou shall not kill, unless it's for dinner!
Thou shall not sleep within an interrupt handler.
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's tagline
Though I am always in haste, I am never in a hurry. John Wesley
Though a tree grow ever so high, the falling leaves return to the ground. Malayan Proverb
Though all afflictions are evils in themselves, yet they are good for us, because they discover to us our disease and tend to our cure. John Tillotson
Though familiarity may not breed contempt, it takes off the edge of admiration. William Hazlitt
Though force can protect in emergency, only justice, fairness, consideration and cooperation can finally lead men to the dawn of eternal peace. Dwight D. Eisenhower
Thought and theory must precede all salutary action; yet action is nobler in itself than either thought or theory. William Wordsworth
Thought for the day: What if there were no hypothetical situations? To be a winner, all you need to give is all you have. Anonymous
Thought is the blossom; language the bud; action the fruit behind it. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Thought takes man out of servitude, into freedom. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Thought that is silenced is always rebellious ... Majorities, of course, are often mistaken. This is why the silencing of minorities is always dangerous. Criticism and dissent are the indispensable antidote to major delusions. Alan Barth
Thousands of journeys have a start but no end.
Three can keep a secret if two of them are dead. Benjamin Franklin
Three can keep a secret, if two are dead.
Three cheers for life.
Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for. Addison
Three may keep a secret if two of them are dead. Benjamin Franklin
Three things give us hardy strength: sleeping on hairy mattresses, breathing cold air, and eating dry food. Welsh Proverb
Three things it is best to avoid: a strange dog, a flood, and a man who thinks he is wise. Welsh Proverb
Threescore years and ten is enough; if a man can't suffer all the misery he wants in that time, he must be numb. Josh Billings
Through life's dark road his sordid way he wends; an incarnation of fat dividends. Charles Sprague
Through our great good fortune, in our youth our hearts were touched with fire. It was given to us to learn at the outset that life is a profound and passionate thing. Oliver Wendell Holmes
Through perserverence many people win success out of what seemed destined to be certain failure. Benjamin Disraeli
Through pride we are ever deceiving ourselves. But deep down below the surface of the average conscience a still, small voice says to us, 'Something is out of tune.' Carl Jung
Throw it away and you will need it next day.
Throw rocks at sea-birds; leave no tern unstoned.
Throw your heart over the fence and the rest will follow. Norman Vincent Peale
Thus we see that the all important thing is not killing or giving life, drinking or not drinking, living in the town or the country, being unlucky or lucky, winning or losing. It is how we win, how we lose, how we live or die, finally, how we choose. R. H. Blyth
Thy friendship oft has made my heart to ache; do be my enemyfor friendship's sake. William Blake
Thy logick, like thy locks, is disarrayed;
Tic Tac Toe and way to go
Tick - Tock, Tick - Tock. Time is wasting away...
Tie a yellow ribbon around Jane Fonda's neck..
Tilt your chair back, your breath is effecting my RAM!
Tilting at windmills hurts you more than the windmills.
Time - Nature's way of making sure everything doesn't happen at once.
Time Stops for no man.  Except me.
Time Time cuts down all, Both great and small. Anonymous
Time Travel Seminar -- Two weeks ago, Thursday.
Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of 30. Robert Frost
Time and tide wait for no man.
Time and tide, nothing and no one can stop us now...
Time and words can never be recalled.
Time as he grows old teaches all things.
Time cancels young pain.    |   Euripides (431 BC)
Time eases all things. |   Sophocles (406 BC)
Time flies like an arrow -- fruit flies like a banana.
Time flies like an arrow, Fruit flies like bananas
Time flies like an arrow.
Time flies like an arrow; banana flies like a fruit. Groucho Marx
Time flies like arrow; fruit flies like banana.
Time flies like wind.  Fruit flies like pears.
Time flies when you don't know what you're doing.
Time flies, when you don't know what you're doing.
Time for culture, gone Chopin, Bach in a minuet.
Time goes? No.  Alas time stays, we go.
Time has convinced me of one thing: Television is for appearing onnot for looking at. Noel Coward
Time heals all wounds Proverb
Time invested in improving ourselves cuts down on time wasted in disapproving of others. Anonymous
Time is a dressmaker specializing in alterations. Faith Baldwin
Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils. Hector Berlioz
Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so.
Time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so. Douglas Adams
Time is an illusion. Lunch, doubly so.
Time is an illusion....especially while modeming!
Time is at once the most valuable and the most perishable of all our possessions. John Randolph
Time is but the stream I go a-fishin in. I drink at it, but while I drink I see the sandy bottom and detect how shallow it is. It's thin current slides away, but eternity remains. Henry David Thoreau
Time is but the stream I go a-fishin in. I drink at it, but while I drink I see the sandy bottom and detect how shallow it is. Itls thin current slides away, but eternity remains. Henry David Thoreau
Time is just nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.
Time is like money, the less we have of it to spare the further we make it go. Josh Billings
Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once. Anonymous
Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.
Time is nature's way of making sure everything doesn't happen at once.
Time is nature's way of making sure that everything doesn't happen at once.
Time is precious, but truth is more so.
Time is so everything doesn't happen at once.
Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you. Carl Sandburg
Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you., Carl Sandburg
Time is the dressmaker specializing in alterations.
Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend.
Time is the wisest of all counselors. Plutarch
Time spent in getting even would be better spent in getting ahead. Anonymous
Time takes time.
Time to die...| Roy Batty
Time travel gives me nosebleeds. | LaForge
Time, place, and action may with pains be wrought, But Genius must be born; and never can be taught. John Dryden
Time, whose tooth gnaws away at everything else, is powerless against truth. Thomas Huxley
Tips: Wages we pay other people's hired help.
Tis after death that we measure men. James Barron Hope
Tis better to be hunter than hunted.
Tis better to have loved and lost than just to have lost.
Tis but a flesh wound...
Titleist tango: The wiggles some golfers make before every shot.
To 'leave a sting within a brother's heart.' Edward Young
To Freud, the world consists of housewives only.
To Serve Man.
To Ski or Not to Ski THAT is the Question!
To YOU I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
To a cat, "NO!" means "Not while I'm looking!"
To a dog his owner is Napoleon; hence their popularity.
To add insult to injury.
To all virgins.  Thanks for nothing
To attract good fortune, spend a new coin on an old friend, share an old pleasure with a new friend, and lift up the heart of a true friend by writing his name on the wings of a dragon. Chinese Proverb
To avoid criticism do nothing, say nothing, be nothing. Elbert Hubbard
To avoid embarrasment, don't tell anyone else your intentions!
To avoid seeing a fool, break your mirror.
To baldly go where no one has gone before : Picard
To be a Jew is a destiny. Vicki Baum
To be a human without passion is to be dead.
To be a man's own fool is bad enough; but the vain man is everybody's. William Penn
To be absolutely certain about something, one must know everything or nothing about it. Olin Miller
To be and not to be, that is the contradiction.
To be born rich is an accident. To die rich is a miracle.
To be furious in religion is to be irreligiously religious. William Penn
To be good is noble, but to teach others how to be good is noblerand less trouble. Mark Twain
To be human without passion is to be dead.
To be in hell is to drift; to be in heaven is to steer. George Bernard Shaw
To be in love is merely to be in a state of perpetual anesthesia, to mistake an ordinary young woman for a goddess. H.L. Mencken
To be innocent is to be not guilty; but to be virtuous is to overcome our evil inclinations. William Penn
To be intoxicated is to feel sophisticated but not be able to say it.
To be is to do | Sartre
To be left alone, and face to face with my own crime, had been just retribution. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
To be or Not is the Result!
To be or not to be, those are the parametres.
To be positive: to be mistaken at the top of one's voice. Ambrose Bierce
To be prepared for War is one of the most effectual means of preserving peace. George Washington
To be prepared for war is one of the most effective means of preserving peace. George Washington
To be proud and inaccessible is to be timid and weak. Jean Baptiste Masillon
To be stupid, selfish, an have good health are three requirements for happiness, though if stupidity is lacking, all is lost. Gustave Flaubert
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and, whatever you hit, call it the target.
To be too clever is to be stupid.
To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved.
To be vain of one's rank or place, is to show that one is below it. Stanislas I
To be what no one ever was, To be what everyone has been: Freedom is the mean of those Extremes that fence all effort in. Mark Van Doren
To be wise, the only thing you need to know is when to say "I don't know."
To be with God. Confucius
To be witty is not enough. One must possess sufficient wit to avoid having too much of it. Andr Maurois
To be wronged is nothing unless you continue to remember it.
To be, or not to be, those are the parameters.
To bear other people's afflictions, everyone has courage and enough to spare. Benjamin Franklin
To become a thoroughly good man is the best prescription for keeping a sound mind and a sound body. Francis Bowen
To believe your own thought, to believe that what is true for you in your private heart is true for all menthat is genius. Ralph Waldo Emerson
To boldly go and watch Star Trek re-runs.
To boldly go where no man has..... Oh, Hello!
To boldly go where no one has gone before.
To boldly go where no one wants to...
To boldly go where no sane man has any business.
To cease smoking is the easiest thing I ever did, I ought to know because I've done it a thousand times. Mark Twain
To change and change for the better are two different things. German Proverb
To climb a ladder, you begin with the first rung.
To climb steep hills requires slow pace at first. William Shakespeare
To climb the ladder of success you must get through the crowd at the bottom.
To copy others is necessary, but to copy oneself is pathetic. Pablo Picasso
To criticize the incompetent is easy; it is more difficult to criticize the competent.
To curb the machine and limit art to handicraft is a denial of opportunity. Lewis Mumford
To deceive a diplomat speak the truth, he has no experience with it. Greek Proverb
To deny the freedom of the will is to make morality impossible. James A. Froude
To die for an idea is to place a pretty high price on conjectures. Anatole France, from The Revolt of the Angels
To do a perfectly unselfish act for selfish motives. Elbert Hubbard
To do is to be | Nietzsche
To do nothing at all is the most difficult thing in the world, the most difficult and the most intellectual. Oscar Wilde
To do nothing is also a good remedy.
To do nothing is in every person's power.
To do nothing is to be nothing.
To do two things at once is to do neither.
To eat is human, to digest, divine.
To educate a man in mind and not in morals is to educate a menace to society. Theodore Roosevelt
To endeavor to work upon the vulgar with fine sense is like attempting to hew blocks with a razor. Alexander Pope
To err is human but mostof us never make mistake
To err is human, but to really screw things up requires a computer.
To err is human, but when the eraser wears out ahead of the pencil, you're overdoing it. Josh Jenkins
To err is human, but when the eraser wears out before the pencil, you're overdoing it a little.
To err is human, to eat Jello, is messy.
To err is human, to forgive is Not Company Policy.
To err is human, to forgive is against FidoNet policy.
To err is human, to forgive is against company policy.
To err is human, to forgive is against my policy
To err is human, to forgive is out of the question.
To err is human. To blame someone else is politics.
To err is human. To forgive is unusual.
To err is human. To moo bovine
To err is human. To moo is bovine.
To err is human. To really foul things up requires a computer.
To err is human. To really screw up it takes a computer!
To err is human; to blame it on someone else is more human.
To err is human; to forgive is against company policy.
To err is human; to forgive, divine. Alexander Pope
To err is to screw up....
To every Phd. there is an equal and opposite Phd. -- B. Duggan.
To every rule there is an exception, and vice versa.
To every rule there's an exception & vice versa.
To excel at what you do, you must love doing it.
To expect a personality to survive the disintegration of the brain is like expecting a cricket club to survive when all of uits members are dead. Bertrand Russell
To fall in love you have to be in the state of mind for it to take, like a disease. Nancy Mitford
To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead. Bertrand Russell
To fill the hour-that is happiness. Ralph Waldo Emerson
To fill the hourthat is happiness. Ralph Waldo Emerson
To find a policeman in a hurry, double-park.
To find out a girl's faults, praise her to her girl friends.
To get a loan you must prove you don't need it.
To get into the best society nowadays, one has either to feed people, amuse people, or shock people. Oscar Wilde
To get to heaven, turn right and keep straight. Anon.
To give happines is to deserve happiness.
To give happiness is to deserve happiness.
To give up pretensions is as blessed a relief as to get them gratified. William James
To give up your seat in a car to a woman, and tread on your neighbor's foot to get even. Elbert Hubbard
To go beyond the bounds of moderation is to outrage humanity. Blaise Pascal
To go where no man has gone before... BBSing !
To hate fatigues. Jean Rostand
To have a friend you must first be one.
To have a good enemy, choose a friend; he knows where to strike. Diane de Pointers
To have a quiet mind is to possess one's mind wholly; to have a calm spirit is to possess one's self Hamilton Mabie
To have died once is enough.
To have doubted one's own first principles, is the mark of a civilized man. Oliver Wendell Holmes
To heir is human. Dolores E. McGuire
To him who is in fear, everything rustles. | Sophocles
To him whose elastic and vigorous thought keeps pace with the sun, the day is a perpetual morning. Henry David Thoreau
To his dog every man is Napoleon.
To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. Aldous Huxley
To hold the same views at forty as we held at twenty is to have been stupefied for a score of years, and take rank, not as a prophet, but as an unteachable brat, well birched and none the wiser. Robert Louis Stevenson
To increase speed add lightness.
To inherit property is not to be bornit is to be still-born, rather. Henry David Thoreau
To invent, you need a good imagination and a pile of junk. Thomas Alva Edison, amedican inventor and industrialist
To iterate is human, to recurse divine.
To iterate is human, to recurse is divine.
To iterate is human, to recurse, divine.
To iterate is human; to recurse, divine.
To keep your friends treat them kindly; to kill them, treat them often.
To keep your friends, treat them kindly; to kill them, treat them often.
To keep your milk sweet, leave it in the cow.
To keep your secret is wisdom; but to expect others to keep it is folly. Samuel Johnson
To know and to act are one and the same. Samurai Proverb
To know recursion, you must first know recursion.
To know the road ahead, ask those coming back.
To know the road ahead, ask those coming back. Chinese Proverb
To laugh at men of sense is the privilege of fools.
To laugh at people of sense is the privilege of fools.
To lay aside all prejudices, is to lay aside all principles. He who is destitute of principles is governed by whims. Friedrich H. Jacobi
To light a candle is to cast a shadow.
To live in mankind is far more than to live in a name. Vachel Lindsay
To live in the hearts we leave behind, is not to die.
To live now, first come to terms with your past.
To live outside the law, you must be an honest man.
To live under the American Constitution is the greatest political privilege that was ever accorded to the human race. Calvin Coolidge
To live well, know the difference between good and evil.
To live-is to risk dying.
To look back to antiquity is one thing, to go back to it is another. Charles Caleb Colton
To lose one's self in reverie, one must be either very happy, or very unhappy. Reverie is the child of extremes. Antoine Rivarol
To love and win is the best thing. To love and lose, the next best. William M. Thackeray
To love is good, love being difficult.
To love is to place our happiness in the happiness of another. Gottfried Wilhelm von Leibnitz
To lower the thermostat on the bridge of the Enterprise; to coldly go where no man has gone before.
To make a speech immortal you don't have to make it everlasting.
To make pleasures pleasant shorten them. Charles Buxton
To make pleasures pleasant, shorten them. Charles Buxton
To me personally, it's nothing personal to me.
To me, there is something superbly symbolic in the fact that an astronaut, sent up as assistant to a series of computers, found that he worked more accurately and more intelligently than they. Inside the capsule, man is still in charge. Adlai E Stevenson
To mortify and even to injure an opponent, reproach him with the very defect or vice ... you feel ... in yourself. Ivan Turgenev
To murder character is as truly a crime as to murder the body: the tongue of the slanderer is brother to the dagger of the assassin. Tryon Edwards
To pass through a time-warp backward through time; to oldly go where no man has gone before.
To process or not to process, that is the question !
To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it.
To reform a man, you must begin with his grandmother. Victor Hugo
To reformat a CD-ROM, use steel wool & heavy pressure.
To refuse praise is to seek praise twice.
To register this tagline, send $29 to ....
To regret nothing is the beginning of wisdom.
To respond to this message, press "R"....
To rest is to rust.
To save a single life is better than to build a seven story pagoda.
To say nothing of its holiness or authority, the Bible contains more specimens of genius and taste than any other volume in existence. Walter S. Landor
To say nothing, especially when speaking, is half the art of diplomacy. Will Durant
To scare a bird is not the way to catch it.
To see a need and wait to be asked, is to already refuse.
To see and listen to the wicked is already the beginning of wickedness. Confucius
To see the World in a grain of sand, And a Heaven in a wild flower, Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand, And Eternity in an hour... -William Blake, introduction from Auguries of Innocence
To see what is right, and not do it, is want of courage, or of principle. Confucius
To shave the heads of the crew of the Enterprise; to baldly go where no man has gone before...
To shoot a mime, do you use a silencer?
To sleep, perchance to dream...
To spray the Enterprise in a heavy metallic element; to goldly go where no man has gone before.
To steal this tagline press <CTL> <ALT> <DEL> now.
To stop sinning suddenly. Elbert Hubbard
To study a subject best, understand it thoroughly before you start.
To succeed in the world it is not enough to be stupid, you must also be well-mannered. Voltaire
To swallow and follow, whether old doctrine or new propaganda, is a weakness still dominating the human mind. Charlotte P. Gillman
To take a stand, one first must have legs to stand on.
To take a stand, one must have legs to stand on.
To take arms against a C of troubles.
To take the Genesis online IQ test: press Alt/H
To tax and to please, no more than to love and to be wise, is not given to men. Edmund Burke
To teach is to learn | Japanese Proverb
To teach is to learn.
To the Caliph I am dirt, but to dirt, I am Caliph.
To the landlord belong the doorknobs.
To the old cat, the tender mouse.
To the right, books; to the left, a tea-cup. In front of me, the fireplace; behind me, the post. There is no greater happiness than this. Teiga
To the sick, while there is life there is hope. Cicero
To the timid and hesitating everything is impossible because it seems so. Walter Scott
To tolerate everything is to teach nothing.
To understand one's self is the classic form of consolation; to delude one's self is the romantic. George Santayana
To understand other's miseries, look at their pleasures.
To understand the heart and mind of a person, look not at what he has already achieved, but at what he aspires to. Kahlil Gibran
To upgrade : to take old bugs out, putting new ones in.
To use violence is to already be defeated.
To wear your heart on your sleeve isn't a very good plan; you should wear it inside, where it functions best., from an interview with Barbara Walters, 3/18/87 Margaret Thatcher
To whom should I go to for some self-help?
To win without risk is to triumph without glory. Pierre Corneille
To write a good love letter, you ought to begin without knowing what you mean to say, and to finish without knowing what you have written. Jean Jacques Rosseau
Toad - n. What happens to an illegally parked frog.
Today I am feeling ept, ane, and sipid.
Today I dialed a wrong number...The other person said, 'Hello?' and I said, 'Hello, could I speak to Joey?'...They said, 'Uh...I don't think so...he's only 2 months old.' I said, 'I'll wait.' Stephen Wright
Today I have grown taller from walking with the trees.
Today has been a long year!
Today is Monday, cleverly disguised as Tuesday.
Today is National Existential Ennui Awareness Day.
Today is a bad day to give to charity.
Today is a day for making firm decisions!!!!!  Or is it?
Today is a good day for you to jump in a lake.
Today is a good day to bribe a high ranking public official.
Today is a good day to bribe a high-ranking official.
Today is a good day to bribe a high-ranking public official.
Today is cancelled due to lack of interest !
Today is the first day of the rest of the mess.
Today is the first day of the rest of this mess.
Today is the first day of the rest of your life.
Today is the first day of the rest of your lossage.
Today is the last day of your life (so far).
Today is the last day of your life so far.
Today is the scene of the accident.
Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
Today is the yesterday you worried about tomorrow. Anonymous
Today is your lucky day.
Today the world is the victim of propaganda because people are not intellectually competent. More than anything the United States needs effective citizens competent to do their own thinking. William Mather Lewis
Today's public figures can no longer write their own speeches or books, and there is some evidence that they can't read them either. Gore Vidal
Today's subliminal message is                                     ...
Today's subliminal message is                              !
Today's subliminal message is             .
Today's subliminal thought is:
Today, I believe that I am acting in accordance with the will of the Almighty Creator: by defending myself against the Jew, I am fighting for the work of the Lord. Adolf Hitler (Reichstag speech, 1936)
Today, take an astronaut to launch.
Todays subliminal message is "        "
Toil, feel, think, hope; you will be sure to dream enough before you die, without arranging for it. John Sterling
Tolerance comes with age. I see no fault committed that I myself could not have committed at some time or other. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Tolerance is another word for indifference. W. Somerset Maugham
Tolerance is the oil which takes the friction out of life. Wilbert E. Scheer
Tolkien is hobbit-forming.
Tombs are the clothes of the dead; a grave is but a plain suit; a rich monument is an embroidered one. Thomas Fuller
Tomorrow never comes.
Tomorrow we start dieting!
Tongue tied & twisted, just an earthbound misfit I.
Tonight they had that little bit of luck that we didn't have.
Tonsils cure cancer!!  Want to buy some?
Tony is one of the most courageous people I've ever met. Steve Komac, high school wrestling coach, describing his student, Tony Brown, wrestling competitively at 105 lbs, a year after having both legs amputated following an accident, 1996
Too austere a philosophy makes few wise men; too rigorous politics, few good subjects; too hard a religion, few persons whose devotion is of long continuance. Seigneur de Saint-Evremond
Too bad stupidity isn't painful.
Too busy to laugh? Then you are too busy.
Too clever is dumb.  --Ogden Nash
Too clever is dumb. | Ogden Nash
Too few of the bucks stop here.
Too little sex makes you repeat yourself redundantly.
Too many pages make a tome.
Too many people are ready to carry the stool when the piano needs to be moved. Anonymous
Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity. They seem more afraid of life than death. James F. Byrnes
Too many people confuse free speech with loose talk.
Too many people expect wonders from democracy, when the most wonderful thing of all is just having it. Walter Winchell
Too much gravity argues a shallow mind. Johann Kaspar Lavater
Too much month at the end of the money.
Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.
Too much of a good thing is WONDERFUL.
Too much of a good thing is WONDERFUL.| Mae West
Too much of a good thing is wonderful. Mae West, american actress
Too much shareware, not enough registration $$$.
Too often justice is incidental to law and order.
Too old to know better, too young to resist!
Toodleoo, go with God, and don't take any wooden nickels.
Took an hour to bury the cat.  Silly thing kept moving!
Took an hour to bury the cat. Damn thing kept moving.
Took an hour to bury the cat. Silly thing kept moving.
Toothache tends to start on Saturday night.
Totally non-offensive tagline. G-rated.
Toto, I don't think we're in DOS anymore...
Touch if you must, Pay up if you bust.
Toys are made in heaven, batteries are made in hell.
Trade is the mother of money.
Tradition does not mean that the living are dead, but that the dead are living. Gilbert K. Chesterton
Tradition is an important help to history, but its statements should be carefully scrutinized before we rely on them. Joseph Addison
Traditionalists are pessimists about the future and optimists about the past. Lewis Mumford
Tragedy: Busload of lawyers driving off a cliff with 3 empty seats.
Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond; cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.
Transporter room, beam that tagline up immediately
Transporting really is the safest way to travel.
Transwarp drive in 5 4 3 2 1...<cough> <sputter> <clunk>
Trash your "To Do List"; you won't do it anyway.
Traveler, there is no path, paths are made by walking.
Traveling through hyperspace isn't like dusting crops, boy.
Treason is like diamonds; there is nothing to be made by the small trader. Douglas Jerrold
Treat each day as your last, one day you will be right.
Treat each new situation as though it's a crisis.
Treat your friend as if he might become an enemy.
Trees hit cars only in self-defence.
Trek Classic -- Who Needs Another Generation?
Trek excuse #1: The Prime Directive clearly forbids it
Trekkers work out at the He's Dead Gym.
Trekkies of the world, get a life !
Trespassers will be shot, survivors will be shot again !
Trespassers will be shot; Survivors will be shot again
Tresspassers will be SHOT, survivors will be SHOT AGAIN!
Tried to play my shoehorn... all I got was footnotes
Tried to play my shoehorn... all I got was footnotes!
Tried to play my shoehorn... all I got were footnotes
Trifles make perfection, and perfection is no trifle. Michelangelo
Trifles make perfectionand perfection is no trifle. Michelangelo
Troglodytism does not necessarily imply a low cultural level.
Trouble with political jokes is they get elected.
Troubles are like babies; they only grow by nursing.
Troubleshooting Shortcut #1: Shoot the Trouble.
True Multitasking = 3 PCs and a chair with wheels
True dignity is never gained by place, and never lost when honors are withdrawn. Philip Massinger
True enjoyment comes from activity of the mind and exercise of the body; the two are ever united. Humboldt
True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity before it is entitled to the appellation. George Washington
True genius sees with the eyes of a child and thinks with the brain of a genii. Puzant Kevork Thomajan
True glory strikes root, and even extends itself; all false pretensions fall as do flowers, nor can any feigned thing be lasting. Cicero
True happiness will be found only in true love.
True knowledge lies in knowing how to live. Baltasar Gracin
True popularity is not the popularity which is followed after, but the popularity which follows after. Lord Mansfield
True repentance is to cease from sinning. Ambrose of Milan
Trumpet in a herd of elephants; crow in the company of cocks; bleat in a flock of goats. Malayan Proverb
Trust Everybody, but cut the cards. Finley Peter Dunne
Trust everybody, but always cut the cards.
Trust him not with your secrets, who, when left alone in your room, turns over your papers. Johann Kaspar Lavater
Trust him, but still keep your eyes open.
Trust in Allah, but tie your camel anyway.
Trust in GOD, *and* tie your camel tight
Trust in God, but backup your hard disk TODAY
Trust me -- I'm a Lawyer.
Trust me, I know how how this works....
Trust me, I'm a lawyer.
Trust me, would I lie to you..... TWICE?
Trust men and they will be true to you; treat them greatly and they will show themselves great. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Trust not yourself, but your defects to know, Make use of every friend and every foe. Alexander Pope
Truth exists for the wise, beauty for the feeling heart. Johann von Schiller
Truth gets well if she is run over by a locomotive, while error dies of lockjaw if she scratches her finger. William Cullen Bryant
Truth is MUCH stranger than fiction...
Truth is always exciting. Speak it, then. Life is boring without it. Pearl S. Buck
Truth is always served by great minds, even if they fight it. Jean Rostand
Truth is hard to find and harder to obscure.
Truth is immortal; error is mortal. Mary Baker Eddy
Truth is just another misconception.
Truth is not exciting enough to those who depend on the characters and lives of their neighbors for all their amusement. George Bancroft
Truth is stranger than fiction Proverb
Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't. Mark Twain
Truth is the property of no individual but is the treasure of all men. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Truth won't be in until after lunch.
Truth, like surgery, may hurt. But it cures.| Han Suyin
Truthful:  Dumb and illiterate.
Truthful: Dumb and illiterate.
Truths turn into dogmas the minute they are disputed. Gilbert K. Chesterton
Try Clarion for REAL database development!!
Try Milk of Amnesia - when you need to forget.
Try `stty 0' -- it works much better.
Try a new system or a different approach.
Try as much as possible to be wholly alive, with all your might, and when you laugh, laugh like hell and when you get angry, get good and angry. Try to be alive. You will be dead soon enough. William Saroyan
Try it, you'll like it.  Trust me.
Try later.
Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value. Albert Einstein
Try not to unnecessarily or excessively split infinitives.
Try the Moo Shu Pork.  It is especially good today.
Try to be neat; fall only in designated piles. | Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
Try to develop your own personality.
Try to divide your time evenly to keep others happy.
Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo
Try to value useful qualities in one who loves you.
Trying to establish voice contact--please yell into keyboard.
Trying to get an education here is like trying to take a drink from a fire hose
Trying to think of a good tagline...
Tuba or not tuba?
Tubby or not tubby, fat is the question!
Tuck under thumb and hold firmly.
Turbo Pascal for WINDOWS ? Borland's betrayed me.
Turn right here. No! NO! The OTHER right!
Turn up the light. I don't want to go home in the dark. O' Henry, last words
Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you. Maori proverb
Turning floppies into hard drives.
Twenty years fron now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. Mark Twain
Twixt the optimist and pessimist The difference is droll: The optimist sees the doughnut But the pessimist sees the hole. McLandburgh Wilson, Optimist and Pessimist
Two Wrongs Don't Make A Right, But Three Lefts Do.
Two can live as cheaply as one, for half as long.
Two can live as cheaply as one... for half as long.
Two cannot fall out if one does not choose. Spanish Proverb
Two dumbs : know too much, know too little !
Two elephants fell off a cliff. Boom Boom.
Two guys walk into a bar. Why didn't the second one duck?
Two guys walk into a bar....
Two heads are better than one Proverb
Two heads are better than one.
Two heads are better than one. | John Heywood (1497-1580)
Two is company, three is an orgy.
Two is not equal to three, even for very large values of two.
Two may keep counsel, if two be away. | Heywood (1497-1580)
Two men look out through the same bars; one sees mud, and one the stars.
Two men please Godwho serves Him with all his heart because he knows Him; who seeks Him with all his heart because he knows Him not. Nikita Ivanovich Panin
Two more laser treatments and this is gone. Ted Arnold, actor and comic, describing his plans for the 'Rosanne' tattoo on his chest, 1995
Two most common elements : hydrogen and stupidity.
Two most common elements : hydrogen, stupidity.
Two most common elements in the universe: Hydrogen & Stupidity.
Two most common elements: hydrogen, stupidity
Two of perfect virtue: one dead, the other yet unborn.
Two peanuts went to New York. One was assaulted.
Two rights don't make a wrong, they make an airplane.
Two seals fell off a cliff.  Arf Arf
Two things I hate: People that can't count.
Two things are bad for the heartrunning up stairs and running down people. Bernard M. Baruch
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe. Albert Einstein
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. Albert Einstein
Two writes don't make a novel!
Two wrongs do not make a right. English Proverb
Two wrongs don't make a right Proverb
Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left. Anonymous
Two's company and three's the result.
Two's company, three's the result.
Typed on my Ultra Megger Wallet Whammer.
Typically loud music, more so than the original, made it sound as if the audience was singing along.  (In fact, a good deal of the audience was singing along.)
Typing all of your message in capitals is SHOUTING !
Typographers rule, OQ
Tyranny and anarchy are never far asunder. Jeremy Rentham
Tyranny, like hell, is not easily conquered; yet we have this consolation with us, that the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly: it is dearness only that gives every thing its value. Thomas Paine
Tyrants are seldom free; the cares and the instruments of their tyranny enslave them. George Santayana
Tyrants have always some slight shade of virtue; they support the laws before destroying them. Voltaire
Tyre Shop sign - We Skid You Not.
U.S. Robotics HST DS - Go broke saving money!
U.S. SUPREME COURT
U.S. taxes 1930 = 13%, 1990 = 35%
U.S.A.  The United States of Advertising
UART what UEAT!
UFO's are real.  The Air Force doesn't exist.
UFO's are real; the Air Force doesn't exist.
UNDERWOOD'S FIRST LAW OF EVOLVING SYSTEM DYNAMICS: Once you open a can of worms, the only way to recan them is to use a larger can.
UNIX...  A manly sort of operating system!
USER ERROR:  Replace user and press any key to continue.
USER, n. The word computer professionals use when they mean 'idiot.' Dave Barry
USES DOS,CRT,MOUSE,RAM,C:,PRN,VGA,EGA,ELECTRICITY
Ugliness is in a way superior to beauty because it lasts. Serge Gainsbourg, French vocalist
Ugliness without tact is horrible. Nathaniel Hawthorne
Uh, MC, who'd WANNA touch that?
Uh, oh, looks like time to upgrade already...
Uhu, looks like time to upgrade already...
Ultimate Question Research Team
Ultimate office automation: networked coffee
Ultimate oxymoron : Cash Surplus.
Ultimate oxymoron:  "Cash Surplus"
Ultimately property rights and personal rights are the same thing. Calvin Coolidge
Umlaut Zebra ber alles!
UnZip, expand, explode... What kind of pervert came up with this?
Unable to find COLDBEER.CAN...  SysOp not loaded!!!
Unable to load REALITY.SYS -- Invalid Parameter: /UTOPIA
Unable to load REALITY.SYS; Invalid parameter: /UTOPIA
Unable to locate Coffee -- Operator Halted !
Unable to locate Diet Coke - Operator irritating!
Unable to locate Diet Pepsi -- Operator Halted !
Unable to locate Mt.Dew.Com - Programmer halted!
Unable to locate Pepsi -- Operator Halted !
Unable to locate REALITY.SYS -- Universe halted.
Unable to locate TEAEARLGREY.HOT -- Enterprise halted
Unable to locate coffee -- Operator Halted !
Unable to locate iced tea -- Operator Halted !
Unbelief in one thing springs = blind belief in another.
Unbreakable toys are good for breaking other toys.
Unburdened by the rigors of coherent thought.
Uncertainty and expectation are the joys of life. Security is an insipid thing, though the overtaking and possessing of a wish discovers the folly of the chase. William Congreve
Under a ragged coat lies wisdom. Romanian Proverb
Under a tattered cloak you will generally find a good drinker. Spanish Proverb
Under all speech that is good for anything there lies a silence that is better. Silence is deep as Eternity; speech is shallow as Time. Thomas Carlyle
Under capitalism, man exploits man. Under socailism it's the opposite.
Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer. Mark Twain
Under every stone lurks a politician.
Under every stone lurks a politician. | Aristophanes
Understanding is a two-way street. Eleanor Roosevelt
Understanding is the key. Maybe it's under the mat.
Undertake something that is difficult; it will do you good. Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you will never grow. Ronald E. Osborn
Undetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to detectable errors, which by definition are limited. Laws of Computer Programming, IX
Undetectable errors are infinite; detectable errors by definition are finite.
Undocumented Features will rule the EARTH !
Undoubtedly a man is to labor to better his condition, but first to better himself. William Ellery Channing
Unemployed people are getting bigger.
Unfair! A battle of wits and you are unarmed!
Unfaithfulness in the keeping of an appointment is an act of clear dishonesty. You may as well borrow a person's money as his time. Horace Mann
Unfortunately, the people of Louisiana are not racists. | Vice President Dan Quayle
United we stand, divided we fall. G. P. Morris
Unity to be real must stand the severest strain without breaking. Mahatma Gandhi
Universities are full of knowledge; the freshmen bring a little in and the seniors take none away, and knowledge accumulates. Abbott L. Lowell
Unix - plural of Eunuch.
Unix and the world Unix with you; VAX and you VAX alone.
Unix soit qui mal y pense.
Unix?  I can't even do ONE thing at once.
Unless each man produces more than he receives, increases his output, there will be less for him than all the others. Bernard M. Baruch
Unless the results are known in advance, funding agencies will 	reject the proposal. | Rocky's Lemma of Innovation Prevention
Unless we remember we cannot understand. Edward M. Forster
Unless you can find some sort of loyalty, you cannot find unity and peace in your active living. Josiah Royce
Unless you can see black then white has no meaning
Unlike presidential administrations, problems rarely have terminal dates., from his State of the Union address 1/12/61 Dwight D. Eisenhower
Unqualified superlatives are the worst of all.
Unquestionably, there is progress.  The average American now pays out twice as much in taxes as he formerly got in wages.
Unregistered Evaluation Copy.
Unregistered Evaluation Tagline.
Unspeakable error in module JH at address $
Until people grow up, they have no idea what's cool
Unusual cheeses.
Unwritten laws can not be erased.
Up your accumulator.
Upgraded my network last week.  Yep, new Reeboks!
Upon the education of the people of this country the fate of this country depends. Benjamin Disraeli
Urine: Opposite of you're out.
Use "DEVICE=EXXON" to screw up your environment.
Use DEVICE=EXXON to screw up your enviroment.
Use DEVICE=EXXON to screw up your environment.
Use DEVICE=EXXON.SYS to screw up your environment !
Use EXTEND.ZIP to get more handles on life...
Use GOTOs only to implement a fundamental structure.
Use IF...ELSE  IF...ELSE  IF...ELSE... to implement multi-way branches.
Use Windex On Your Windows
Use contraceptives on every conceivable occasion!
Use debugging compilers.
Use free-form input where possible
Use it up ... Wear it out.  Make it do ... Or do without.
Use library functions.
Use power to curb power. Chinese Proverb
Use soft words and hard arguments. English Proverb
Use your enemy's hand to catch a snake.
Use your enemy's hand to catch a snake. Persian Proverb
Use your own judgement -- then do as I say...
Used Car: Not what it is jacked up to be.
Used Iraqi rifles for sale: Dropped once, never fired.
Used Iraqi rifles for sale: Dropped once, never fired...
Useless as windshield wipers on a duck's ass.
User - a technical term used by computer pros. See idiot.
User-supported tagline. To register send $49.95 to...
Users : Keep them dry and don't feed them after midnight.
Users, losers -- what's the difference?
Users: Keep them dry and don't feed them after midnight.
Using PKZIP Version 2.04zzzzzzzzzzz
Using TSO is like kicking a dead whale across the beach.
Usually insane; in lucid moments merely stupid.
VAIL'S AXIOM: In any human enterprise, work seeks the lowest hierarchal level.
VAXEN [from 'oxen,' perhaps influenced by 'vixen.'] n. pl. The plural of VAX.
VCR's are a way to defeat time.....
VD is nothing to clap about.
VDU - a STD similar to visual AIDS.
VIRTUAL adj. 1. Common alternative to LOGICAL (q.v.), but never used with compass directions. 2. Performing the functions of. Virtual memory acts like real memory, but isn't.
VLSI:  "Getting High On Low Voltage"
Vain-glorious men are the scorn of the wise, the admiration of fools, the idols of paradise, and the slaves of their own vaunts. Francis Bacon
Valuable insights and your persuasive ability achieve results.
Value People exaggerate the value of things they haven't got: everybody worships truth and unselfishness because they have no experience with them. George Bernard Shaw
Vamoose ya little varmint | Data
Vanity as an impulse has without doubt been of far more benefit to civilization than modesty has ever been. William E. Woodward
Vanity is the food of fools.
Vaporware 3.2 : The next best thing to the real thing !
Variables won't. Constants aren't.
Variety of mere nothings gives more pleasure than uniformity of something. Jean Paul Richter
Variety's the very spice of life, that gives it all its flavor. William Cowper
Venerable Nan-Ch'uan asked Chao-chou, 'When not a single thing is brought, then what?' Chao-chou said, 'Put it down.' Nan-ch'uan said, 'If I don't bring a single thing, what should I put down?' Chao-chou said, 'Then carry it out.' Zen Saying
Vengeance has no foresight. Napoleon Bonaparte
Veni Vidi Visa: I came, I saw, I did a little shopping.
Veni, Vidi, VCR -- I came, I saw, I videotaped it.
Verbal agreements frequently lead to verbal disagreements.
Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.
Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things. | Senator Dan Quayle
Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things., Dan Quayle
Verbosity: Refuge Of Those With Nothing Original To Say.
Verbs has to agree with their subjects.
Vertical - a green itch.
Very funny, Scotty - now beam up my clothes.
Very good, Einstein, but next time show your work.
Very often the quiet fellow has said all he knows. Kin Hubbard
Very unfortunate. We will be dead. - Worf
Vests are to suits as seat-belts are to cars.
Veteran, Bermuda Triangle Exploration Team : 1999-1955.
Veterinarians drive like animals.
Vice Versa; Mafia controlled poetry...
Vice versa - poems about brothels?
Vices are often habits rather than passions. Antoine Rivarol
Victories that are easy are cheap. Those only are worth having which come as the result of hard fighting. Henry Ward Beecher
Victory and defeat are each of the same price. Thomas Jefferson
Victory has 100 fathers and defeat is an orphan. Proverb
Vidi, Vici, Veni:  I saw, I conquered, I came
Vidi, vici, veni | Don Juan
Vini, vidi, vici.
Violence cannot build a better society. Disruption and disorder nourish repression, not justice. They strike at the freedom of every citizen. The community cannotit will nottolerate coercion and mob rule. Commission on Civil Disorder, 1968
Violence does even justice unjustly. Thomas Carlyle
Violence has no constitutional sanction; and every government from the beginning has moved against it. But where grievances pile high and most of the elected spokesmen represent the Establishment, violence may be the only effective response. William O. Douglas
Violence in the voice is often only the death rattle of reason in the throat. John F. Boyes
Violence is as American as cherry pie. H. Rap Brown
Violence is not funny. William Friedkin, Director, 1995
Violence is the last recourse of the incompetent.
Vios con dios!
Virginity can be cured.
Virginity is a disease that can be cured.
Virtual Disk - very nearly a storage device.
Virtual: not knowing where your next byte is coming from.
Virtuality Has Taken Precedence Over Reality!
Virtue consists, not in abstaining from vice, but in not desiring it. George Bernard Shaw
Virtue has never been as respectable as money.| Mark Twain
Virtue is a state of war, and to live in it we have always to combat with ourselves. Jean Jacques Rousseau
Virtue is its own punishment.
Virtue is its own revenge.
Virtue is like a rich stone, best plain set. Francis Bacon
Virtue must be valuable, if men and women of all degrees pretend to have it. Ed Howe
Virtue treads paths that end not in the grave. James Russell Lowell
Virtue would not go far if vanity did not keep it company. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
Virtuoso: A musican with high morals.
Virus detected on your HD. .transfer aborted
Virus detected on your hard disk !
Virus detected!  P)our chicken soup on motherboard?
Virus in the HD? who you gonna call? WORMBUSTERS
Virus scanner: "DOS" found.  Remove? (Y)
Virus scanner: "Windows" found.  Remove? (Y)
Virus: "Something that corrupts or poisons the mind or soul" (Dictionary)
VirusScan - "Windows found: Remove it? (Y/y)"
Vision without action is a daydream. Action with without vision is a nightmare. Japanese Proverb
Vision: the art of seeing things invisible. Jonathan Swift
Visit beautiful Vergas, Minnesota.
Visit beautiful Wisconsin Dells.
Visit your money this year - vacation in Washington, D.C.
Visitors are insatiable devourers of time, and fit only for those who, if they did not visit, would do nothing. William Cowper
Vodka is the best way to cook potatoes.  You get all the flavor of the potato and don't even have to put in your false teeth. -- Albert Engstrom.
Volcano - a mountain with hiccups.
Volcano -- a mountain with hiccups.
Volcano: A moutain with hiccups.
Volem missatges en catal!!!
Vote 1 AGRO - For Prime Minister!!!
Vote Anarchist.
Vote Republican, it's easier than thinking.
Vote for the man who promises least. He'll be the least disappointing. Bernard Baruch (1870,1965)
Vote for the man who promises leasthe'll be the least disappointing. Bernard M. Baruch
Vows made in storms are forgotten in calm. Thomas Fuller
Vows made in storms are forgotten in calms.
Vuja De - The Feeling You've Never Been Here
Vulcans have less fun.
Vulgarity is more obvious in satin than in homespun. Nathaniel P. Willis
Vulgarity is the conduct of other people, just as falsehoods are the truths of other people. Oscar Wilde
Vulgarity is the garlic in the salad of taste. Cyril Connolly
Vulgarity is the rich man's modest contribution to democracy. Anonymous
Vulgarity: The conduct of others.
Vulnerant omnia, ultima necat. (All the [hours] wound you, the last one kills) Latin Proverb
Vultures only fly with carrion luggage.
W el l,  I  f ou n d th e s  pac  e b a   r
WAGNER'S LAW OF SPORTS TV: When the camera isolates on a male athlete, he will either spit, pick or scratch.
WAITER! there's soup in my fly!
WALLACE'S OBSERVATION: Everything is in a state of utter dishevelment.
WALTER'S LAW OF POLITICS: A fool and his money are soon elected.
WAR, n. A by-product of the arts of peace... Ambrose Bierce
WARNING ! No user serviceable characters in this tagline.
WARNING ... drinking tap water can kill your thirst!
WARNING : Programmer X-ing
WARNING!  No user serviceable characters in this tagline.
WARNING! I Steal Taglines! (This one for example)
WARNING... drinking tap water may kill your thirst
WARNING... drinking tap water may kill your thirst!
WARNING: Do not attempt this at home.
WARNING: Programmer X-ing
WARNING: The Surgeon General Started Smoking!
WARNING: my messages are offensive to morons!
WEBER'S DEFINITION: An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less until he knows nothing.
WEINBERG'S FIRST LAW: Progress is made on alternate Fridays.
WEINER'S LAW OF LIBRARIES: There are no answers, only cross-references.
WETHERN'S LAW: Assumption is the mother of all screw-ups.
WHAT ??? Give up C:\> for silly ICONS ???
WHAT?  Bigger Docs?  V^^^\_ o^o _/^^^V
WHAT? Take you to our leader? PLEASE take him with you!
WHAT??? Give up C:\> for silly ICONS?
WHISTLER'S LAW: You never know who's right, but you always know who's in charge.
WHeRe is ThaT DArN ShIfT keY ?
WILDNET : If you're interested in something different.
WILLIAMS AND HOLLAND'S LAW:If enough data is collected, anything may be proven by statistics.
WIN Error #104: Operator fell asleep while waiting
WIN.COM not found: (A)bort (R)etry (W)ho cares?
WIN.INI? Let's see what the User's Guide says...
WIN3.0 Attractive and easy, SLUT of the computer
WINDOWS : Just say NO !!!
WINDOWS MULTITASKS (in a DesqView window)
WINDOWS MULTITASKS! (in a DesqView window)
WINDOWS ON AN 8088 IS A REAL EXPERIENCE !
WINDOWS SUCKS !
WINDOWS, Just say NO!!!
WINDOWS: An overpriced way to eat up HD space
WINGER'S RULE: If it sits on your desk for 15 minutes, you've just become the expert.
WINTER is Nature's way of saying, "UP YOUR'S!"
WOM - Write only memory
WOMAN.ZIP -- Great program, no documentation !
WOMAN.ZIP... Great program but no documentation.
WOMAN.ZIP....Great program, no documentation!
WOMEN: Weird Obnoxious Male Enticing Nymphs
WORK HARDER!... Millions on welfare depend on YOU!!!
WP Corp Support Can't Be Beat!
WP for WIN will be a Winner!
WWhhaatt   ddooeess   dduupplleexx    mmeeaann??
WYTYSYDG -- What you thought you saw, you didn't get.
W[h]ere know tagline as gone before....
Wagner's music is better than it sounds.
Wait for that wisest of all counselors, Time.
Wait until it is night before saying it has been a fine day.
Wait until it is night before saying that it has been a fine day. French Proverb
Wait, Don't Pick Up That ph{ŒԜ
Waiter, there are monsters in my transporter   Barclay
Waiter, there's no fly in my soup! - Kermit
Waiter: Unemployed actor
Waiting for my '$99.95 dBase offer' from Borland !
Waiting for somedough
Waiting is a trap. There will always be reasons to wait...The truth is, there are only two things in life, reasons and results, and reasons simply don't count. Robert Anthony
Waiting to overcome all objections, results in nothing.
Wake up and smell the chaos! Dennis Miller
Wake up, America. Augustus P. Gardner
Walk softly and carry a big stick.
Walk softly and carry a fully charged PHASER!
Walk softly and carry a fully charged PHASER.
Walk softly and carry a megawatt laser.
Walk softly, and carry a photon missile launcher.
Walk the path of life the way you like but look out for snakes.
Walk through doors, don't crawl through Windows.
Walk till the blood appears on the cheek, but not the sweat on the brow. Spanish Proverb
Walls impede my progress
Walt Disney is in suspended animation.
Wanna byte my bit ?
Wanna do something big? Pick up a boulder.
Wanna flirt with disaster? Become a SysOp!
Wanna fuck like bunnies?|Pick up line
Wanna giggle? Try (EDITOR=EDLIN !) in anything.
Want a LAUGH run a spell check on DSZ docs.
Want a jelly baby?
Want a stupid answer? Ask me anything!
Want is a growing giant whom the coat of Have was never large enough to cover. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Want to confuse people? Quote from the wrong message!
Want to forget all your troubles? Wear tight shoes.
Wanted - Man to wash dishes and two waitresses.
Wanted: Good taglines to steal...
Wanted: Programmers. Some assembly required.
Wanted: Volcano.  Average size.  Must be active.
Wanted: Woman with computer. Send photo of computer.
War News: Sadam's army blown away by Thai hookers.
War challenges virtually every other institution of societythe justice and equity of its economy, the adequacy of its political systems, the energy of its productive plant, the bases, wisdom and purposes of its foreign policy. Walter Millis
War destroys men, but luxury destroys mankind; at once corrupts the body and the mind. John Crowne
War is a game that is played with a smile. If you can't smile, grin. If you can't grin, keep out of the way till you can. Sir Winston Churchill
War is hell. William Tecumseh Sherman
War is its own punishment.
War is much too serious a matter to be entrusted to the military. French Proverb
War is not merely a political act but a real political instrument, a continuation of political intercourse, a carrying out of the same by other means. Karl von Clausewitz
War is the last refuge of incompetent statesmen.
War is the science of destruction. John Abbott
War never decides who is right, only who is left.
War spares not the brave, but the cowardly.
Warning:  Whimsical when bored
Warning: Politicians can damage your wealth.
Warning: any tagline I see is fair game.
Warning: drinking water may kill your thirst!
Warp 5 ... engage.  No, no, Mr. Data, more clutch
Warp 5, Engage.. $%^#!! More clutch, Data! MORE CLUTCH!
Warranty and guarantee clauses are voided by payment of the invoice.
Warranty: If it breaks, both halves are yours.
Was Beehtoven's 1st movement done in the toilet or privy?
Was Jimi Hendrix's modem a Purple Hayes?
Was Tasha Yar the Enterprise's expert on Data entry?
Was That Your Wife I Saw In That GIF ?
Was it a car or a cat I saw?
Was it as good for you, as it was for me?
Was it only just a dream?| John Lennon, looking back on the Beatles.
Was that your wife I saw in that GIF.
Was today really Necessary?
Washing Windows is better than running them.
Waste is worse than loss. The time is coming when every person who lays claim to ability will keep the question of waste before him constantly. The scope of thrift is limitless. Thomas A. Edison
Waste neither time nor money, but make the best use of both. Without industry and frugality, nothing will do, and with them everything. Benjamin Franklin
Waste not fresh tears over old griefs.
Waste not fresh tears over old griefs.| Euripides (431 BC)
Waste not, get your budget cut next year.
Waste not, want not Proverb
Wasting time is an important part of life.
Wasting time is an important part of living.
Watch it - You're trying my infinite patience
Watch it - you're trying my infinite patience.
Watch out for number one, but don't step in number two.
Watch out for off-by-one errors.
Watch out for the old mortar in the rocks in the fourteenth hole trick.
Watch out where the Huskies go and don't you eat that yellow snow
Watch out where the Huskies go and don't you eat that yellow snow!
Watch out!  Your PKZIP is open!
Watch where you go... remember where you've been...
Watch where you go...remember where you've been...
Watch your back - hot files coming through!
Watch your mouth, kid, or you'll find yourself floating home.
Water + Malt + Hops + Yeast = Satisfaction
Water created humans so it would have containers.
Watson Come here I need you
Watson! Come here! I need you!
Watson, the game's afoot !
Wave Mechanics - people who fix waves.
Wave to your neighbor, Word to your mother.
Ways to skin a cat #27: Use an electric belt sander.
We ARGO ing to get in trouble.....
We English are good at forgiving our enemies; it releases us from the obligation of liking our friends. P.D. James
We Know We Belong To The Land..OK
We NEVER grow up, we just get older, and older, and ...
We acquire the strength we have overcome. Ralph Waldo Emerson
We ain't slow, we just nap when we're sleepy !
We all have enough strength to endure the misfortunes of others. Franois de la Rochefoucauld
We all have our darker side. We need it...
We all know that no one understands anything that isn't funny.
We all live in a state of ambitious poverty.
We all live in a yellow object method !
We all live in a yellow subroutine.
We always love those who admire us; we do not always love those whom we admire. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
We are Channel 9 of Borg. Your regular timeslot has been assimilated.
We are NOT surrounded.  We are in a target-rich environment.
We are Play School of Borg. Prepare to be assimilated by Big Teddy.
We are a nation of many nationalities, many races, many religionsbound together by a single unity, the unity of freedom and equality. Whoever seeks to set one nationality against another, seeks to degrade all nationalities. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
We are a rebellious nation. Our whole history is treason; our blood was attained before we were born; our creeds were infidelity to the mother church; our constitution treason to our fatherland. Theodore Parker
We are all alike, on the inside. Mark Twain
We are all driven into the same fold. | Horace (8 BC)
We are all fellow passengers on a dot of earth. And each of us, in the span of time, has really only a moment among our companions. Lyndon Baines Johnson
We are all just monkeys in business suits running around pretending to be executives. Anon.
We are all related...relatively speaking.
We are all tattooed in our cradles with the beliefs of our tribe. Oliver Wendell Holmes
We are all travellers in the wilderness of this world, and the best we can find in our travels is an honest friend. Robert Louis Stevenson
We are all worms, but I do believe that I am a glow-worm. Winston Churchill
We are always paid for our suspicion by finding what we suspect. Henry David Thoreau
We are apt to forget that children watch examples better than they listen to preaching. Roy L. Smith
We are born believing. A man bears beliefs, as a tree bears apples. Ralph Waldo Emerson
We are bound to our bodies like an oyster is to its shell. Plato
We are but dust and shadow.  | Horace (8 BC)
We are confident that we can penetrate any enemy defenses with our missiles. We know that we are more than the equal of any nation in the world. Robert McNamara
We are confronted by a first danger, the destructiveness of applied atomic energy. And then we are confronted by a second danger, that we do not enough appreciate the first danger. Raymond G. Swing
We are decent 99 percent of the time, when we could easily be vile. R. W. Riis
We are discreet sheep; we wait to see how the drove is going, and then go with the drove. Mark Twain
We are double-edged blades, and every time we whet our virtue the return stroke straps our vice. Henry David Thoreau
We are healed of a suffering only by experiencing it in full. Marcel Proust
We are here to add what we can to life, not to get what we can from it. William Osler
We are in bondage to the law so that we may be free.
We are in the midst of a great transition from narrow nationalism to international partnership. Lyndon Baines Johnson
We are made wise not by the recollection of our past, but by the responsibility for our future. George Bernard Shaw
We are near waking when we dream we are dreaming. Friedrich Novalis
We are never so happy or unhappy as we think. Francois duc la Rochefoucauld
We are never so ridiculous by the qualities we have, as by those we affect to have. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
We are no more than candles burning in the wind.| Japanese Proverb
We are not a clone.
We are not alone.
We are not free, it was not intended we should be. A book of rules is placed in our cradle, and we never get rid of it until we reach our graves. Then we are free, and only then. Ed Howe
We are not punished for our sins, but by them.
We are now at a point where we must educate our children in what no one knew yesterday, and prepare our schools for what noone knows yet. Margaret Mead
We are on a roll Cavorting on the Butter
We are shaped and fashioned by what we love. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
We are ships that pass in the night.
We are stripped bare by the curse of plenty. Winston Churchill
We are the Nubs...beat it, you guys!
We are the carriers of health and diseaseeither the divine health of courage and nobility or the demonic diseases of hate and anxiety. Joshua Loth Liebman
We are the knights who say, "NIE!"
We are the knights who say, "NIE"
We are the people our parents warned us about !
We are the people our parents warned us about.
We are under a Constitution, but the Constitution is what the judges say it is, and the judiciary is the safeguard of our liberty and of our property under the Constitution. Charles Evans Hughes
We are very much what others think of us. The reception our observations meet with gives us courage to proceed, or damps our efforts. William Hazlitt
We ask advice but we mean approbation.
We believe at once in evil, we only believe in good upon reflection. Is this not sad? Madame Dorothe Deluzy
We boast our emancipation from many superstitions; but if we have broken any idols, it is through a transfer of idolatry. Ralph Waldo Emerson
We build statues out of snow, and weep to see them melt. Walter Scott
We came, we saw, we BBSed.
We can defeat gravity.  The problem is the paperwork involved.
We can offer up much in the large, but to make sacrifices in little things is what we are seldom equal to. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
We can only change the world by changing men. Charles Wells
We can plant wheat every year, but the people who are starving die only once. Fiorello H. La Guardia
We can't all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by. Will Rogers
We can't go back, and we can't stay here.  | Picard
We cannot banish dangers, but we can banish fears. We must not demean life by standing in awe of death. David Sarnoff
We cannot be separated in interest or divided in purpose. We stand together until the end. Woodrow Wilson
We cannot conquer fate and necessity, yet we can yield to them in such a manner as to be greater than if we could. Walter S. Landor
We cannot despair of humanity, since we ourselves are human beings. Albert Einstein
We cannot direct the wind...But we can adjust the sails.
We cannot do everything at once, but we can do something at once.
We cannot kindle when we will The fire which in the heart resides, The spirit bloweth and is still, In mystery our soul abides: But tasks, in hours of insight willed, May be through hours of gloom fulfilled -Matthew Arnold
We cannot live only for ourselves. A thousand fibers connect us with our fellow men; and among those fibers, as sympathetic threads, our actions run as couses, and they come back to us as effects. Herman Melville
We classify disease as error, which nothing but Truth or Mind can heal. Mary Baker Eddy
We come in peace, shoot to kill.
We come in peace.  Shoot to kill.
We come to reason, not to dominate. We do not seek to have our way, but to find a common way. Lyndon Baines Johnson
We composers are at least as significant as the stars who make $14 million or $15 million. You just don't see us. Michael Kamen, movie score composer, 1995
We consider that any man who can fiddle all through one of those Virginia Reels without losing his grip, may be depended upon in any kind of musical emergency. Mark Twain
We could do that, but it would be wrong, that's for sure.
We declare war with the wages system, which demoralizes alike the hirer and the hired, cheats both, and enslaves the workingman. Wendell Phillips
We defend and we build a way of life, not for America alone, but for all mankind. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
We do everything by custom, even believe by it; our very axioms, let us boast of free-thinking as we may, are oftenest simply such beliefs as we have never heard questioned. Thomas Carlyle
We do not count a man's years until he has nothing else to count.
We do not have to visit a madhouse to find disordered minds; our planet is the mental institution of the universe. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
We do not rejoice in victories. We rejoice when a new kind of cotton is grown and when strawberries bloom in Israel. Golda Meir
We do not want the men of another color for our brothers-in-law, but we do want them for our brothers. Booker T. Washington
We do precision guesswork.
We do what we can but it's never enough.
We do what we must, and call it by the best names. Ralph Waldo Emerson
We do. We are. What more can you ask for?
We don't care. We don't have to. We're Telecom...
We don't charge for autographs here. We give them away free. (Anonymous Baseball Player), with the Beloit, Wisconsin 'Snappers', 1995
We don't have Sarcasm on our planet...
We don't know a millionth of one percent about anything. Thomas Alva Edison, amedican inventor and industrialist
We don't need no stinkin' patches !
We don't really understand it, so we'll give it to the programmers.
We don't see eye to eye, but we have a common interest: your money. Johnny Ryman, alias Johnny Rotten, announcing the rationale for a reunion tour of the Sex Pistols, 1996
We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are., Anais Nin
We don't see things as they are. We see them as we are. Anais Nin
We don't seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business. Will Rogers
We easily forget crimes that are known only to ourselves. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
We enact many laws that manufacture criminals, and then a few that punish them. Allen Tucker
We fight not to enslave, but to set a country free, and to make room upon the earth for honest men to live in. Thomas Paine
We forget that the most successful statesmen have been professionals. Lincoln was a professional politician. Felix Frankfurter
We give advice by the bucket, but take it by the grain. William Rounseville Alger
We give nothing as willingly as our advice.
We give up leisure in order that we may have leisure, just as we go to war in order that we may have peace. Aristotle
We go by the major vote, and if the majority are insane, the sane must go to the hospital. Horace Mann
We got rid of our kids. The cats are allergic!
We grow a little every time we do not take advantage of somebody's weakness. Bern Williams
We had better appear what we are, than affect to appear what we are not. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
We hardly find any persons of good sense save those who agree with us. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
We hate delay, yet it makes us wise.
We hate the kindness which we understand. Henry David Thoreau
We have a choice: to plow new ground or let the weeds grow. Jonathan Westover
We have a equal opportunity calculus class -- it's fully integrated.
We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a *part* of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a *part* of Europe.| Dan Quayle
We have a lot of anxieties, and one cancels out another very often. Winston Churchill
We have a lot of people revolutionizing the world because they've never had to present a working model. Charles F. Kettering
We have a sock talking at our commencement. It's kind of upsetting. Southampton College student, commenting on a commencement address by Kermit the Frog, 1996
We have actively sought and are actively seeking to make the United Nations an effective instrument of international cooperation. Dean Acheson
We have an equal opportunity Calculus class -- it's fully integrated.
We have been God-like in our planned breeding of our domesticated plants and animals, but we have been rabbit-like in our unplanned breeding of ourselves. Arnold Joseph Toynbee
We have been pushing the idea that George Bush is going to make matters much, much worse. | Vice President Dan Quayle
We have done so much, for so long, with so little, we are now qualified to do anything with nothing. Anonymous
We have dozens of steaks in Soviet Union, dozens
We have engaged the Borg.  The wedding will be Friday.
We have engaged the Borg. The wedding is Sunday!
We have got to get organized
We have got to get organized!
We have here the latest in primitive technology.
We have inherited new difficulties because we have inherited more privileges. Abram Sacher
We have it in our power to begin the world over again. Thomas Paine
We have made the Reich by propaganda. Joseph Paul Goebbels
We have met the enemy and he is us. Walt Kelly
We have met the enemy, and he's all yours!
We have not lost faith, but we have transferred it from God to the medical profession. George Bernard Shaw
We have provided for the survival of man against all enemies except his fellow man. Lyman Lloyd Bryson
We have resumed control...we have resumed control...
We have seen that the American Constitution has changed, is changing, and by the law of its existence must continue to change, in its substance and practical working even when its words remain the same. James Bryce
We have standards and expect you not to exceed them.
We have the Bill of Rights. What we need is a Bill of Responsibilities. Bill Maher, commedian and commentator, 1995
We have them just where they want us.| Capt. James T. Kirk
We have them just where they want us.| J. T. Kirk
We have to go along a road covered with blood. We have no other alternative. For us it is a matter of life or death, a matter of living or existing. We have to be ready to face the challenges that await us. Gamel Abdel Nasser
We hired you to babysit. You cooked and ate them BOTH?
We hold these truths to be sacred & undeniable; that all men are created equal & independant, that from that equal creation they derive rights inherent & inalienable, among which are the preservation of life, & liberty, & the pursuit of happiness. Thomas Jefferson
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Thomas Jefferson
We in Government have begun to recognize the critical work which must be done at all levelslocal, State and Federalin ending the pollution of our waters. Robert F. Kennedy
We join ourselves to no party that does not carry the American flag, and keep step to the music of the Union. Rufus Choate
We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing; others judge us by what we have done. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
We know accurately only when we know little; with knowledge doubt enters. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
We know nothing of what will happen in future, but by the analogy of experience. Abraham Lincoln
We know the worth of a thing when we have lost it. French Proverb
We know what happens to people who stay in the middle of the road. They get run over. Ambrose Bierce
We know what we are, but know not what we may be. William Shakespeare
We learn by our mistakes, why do I make so many?
We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience. George Bernard Shaw, english playwrite
We learn from history that we do not learn anything from history.
We learn from history that we do not learn from history. Georg Wilhelm F. Hegel
We learn from history that we don't learn from history.
We like all kinds of praise, but a hike in our pay is the best kind.
We live in a wonderful world that is full of beauty, charm and adventure. There is no end to the adventures that we can have if only we seek them with our eyes open. Jawaharlal Nehru
We live in a world that has narrowed into a neighborhood before it has broadened into a brotherhood. Lyndon Baines Johnson
We live in a world where nothing is impossible, except peace and happiness.
We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. Oscar Wilde
We live on an island surrounded by a sea of ignorance. As our island of knowledge grows, so does the shore of our ignorance. John A. Wheeler
We live, not as we wish to, but as we can. | Menander 292bc
We look for things. Things that make us go.
We love force and we care very little how it is exhibited. Ralph Waldo Emerson
We love the Lord, of course, but we often wonder what He finds in us. Ed Howe
We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give. Winston Churchill
We make our own fortunes and call them our fate.
We make way for the man who boldly pushes past us. Christian Nestell Bovee
We may be alone.  We may not be alone.	Either way, the thought is staggering.
We may be alone.  We may not be alone. Either way, the thought is staggering.
We may not return the affection of those who like us, but we always respect their good judgement.
We meet again Obi Wan, but now I am the master.| Darth Vader
We must all hang together, or most assuredly we shall all hang separately. Benjamin Franklin
We must believe in free will. We have no choice.
We must beware of trying to build a society in which nobody counts for anything except a politician or an official, a society where enterprise gains no reward and thrift no privileges. Winston Churchill
We must combine the toughness of the serpent with the softness of the dove, a tough mind and a tender heart. Martin Luther King, Jr.
We must hang together or assuredly we shall hang separately. Benjamin Franklin
We must have strong minds, ready to accept facts as they are. Harry S Truman
We must interpret a bad temper as a sign of inferiority. Alfred Adler
We must learn our limits. We are all something, but none of us are everything. Blaise Pascal
We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools. Martin Luther King, Jr.
We must make the best of those ills which cannot be avoided. Alexander Hamilton
We must make the world honest before we can honestly say to our children that honesty is the best policy. George Bernard Shaw
We must no more ask whether the soul and body are one than ask whether the wax and the figure impressed on it are one. Aristotle (De Anima)
We must not promise what we ought not, lest we be called on to perform what we cannot. Abraham Lincoln
We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the same sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart. H. L. Mencken
We must use time creatively - and forever realize that the time is always hope to do great things. Martin Luther King, Jr.
We must walk consciously only part way toward our goal, and then leap in the dark to our success. Henry David Thoreau
We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. Buck Henry, commedian, 1992
We need more power! Can you give us any more?!
We need more unemployed politicians.
We never know the love of the parent till we become parents ourselves. Henry Ward Beecher
We never know the worth of water till the well is dry. French Proverb
We now return to our regularly scheduled flame-throwing.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled tagline.
We often pay our debts not because it is only fair that we should, but to make future loans easier. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
We ought never do wrong when people are looking. Mark Twain
We ought never to do wrong when people are looking. Mark Twain
We owe a deep debt of gratitude to Adam, the first great benefactor of the human race: he brought death into the world. Mark Twain
We owe to the Middle Ages the two worst inventions of humanitygunpowder and romantic love. Andr Maurois
We perceive and are affected by changes too subtle to be described. Henry David Thoreau
We pity in others only those evils which we have ourselves experienced. Jean Jacques Rousseau
We prefer to speak evil of ourselves rather than not speak of ourselves at all.
We prefer to speak evil of ourselves than not speak of ourselves at all.
We prefer world law, in the age of self-determination, to world war in the age of mass extermination. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
We promise according to our hopes, and perform according to our fears.
We put up with being surpassed more easily than with being equaled.
We read to say that we have read.
We secretly replaced the dilithium crystals with Folgers crystals...
We secretly replaced the dilithium with Folger's Crystals
We secure our friends not by accepting favors but by doing them.
We see a total global market of between 5 to 10 computers.| IBM, 1945
We seek peace, knowing that peace is the climate of freedom. Dwight D. Eisenhower
We seem to have juxtaposed an impasse here
We seem to want mass production, but we must remember that men are individuals not to be satisfactorily dealt with in masses, and the making of men is more important than the production of things. Ralph W. Sockman
We seldom find people ungrateful so long as it is thought we can serve them. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
We should back the metric system every 2.54cm of the way.
We should be as careful of the books we read, as of the company we keep. The dead very often have more power than the living. Tryon Edwards
We should be eternally vigilant against attempts to check the expression of opinions that we loathe. Oliver Wendel Holmes, Jr.
We should develop anti-satellite weapons because we could not have prevailed without them in 'Red Storm Rising'. | Senator Dan Quayle
We should face reality and our past mistakes in an honest, adult way. Boasting of glory does not make glory, and singing in the dark does not dispel fear. King Hussein (Jordan)
We should forgive our enemies, but only after they've been taken out and shot.
We should go metric every inch of the way.
We should keep so close to facts that we never have to remember the second time what we said the first time. F. Marion Smith
We should never let ourselves be burnt for our opinions; we are not that sure of them. But perhaps for this that we may have and change our opinions. Friedrich Nietzsche
We should not expect something for nothing but we all do, and we call it hope. Ed Howe
We should wage war not to win war, but to win peace. Paul Hoffman
We sometimes meet an original gentleman, who, if manners had not existed, would have invented them. Ralph Waldo Emerson
We speak little if not egged on by vanity. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
We speak old metaphors, and we feel proud...
We start out loving our parents and end up hating them. Sometimes we learn to love them again, but we never forgive them.
We struggle with the complexities and avoid the simplicities. Norman Vincent Peale
We support Shareware.. Register Yours.
We sweat so we don't catch fire when making love.
We take drugs very seriously at my house...
We tend to get what we expect. Norman Vincent Peale
We tire of those pleasures we take, but never of those we give. John Petit-Senn
We trifle when we assign limits to our desires, since nature hath set none. Christian Nestell Bovee
We triumph without glory when we conquer without danger. Corneille
We used to be Schizophrenic.
We want YOU McDonnell Douglas!!!
We want the spirit of America to be efficient; we want American character to be efficient; we want American character to display itself in what I may, perhaps, be allowed to call spiritual efficiencyclear disinterested thinking and fearless action along the right lines of thought. Woodrow Wilson
We weep over the graves of infants and the little ones taken from us by death; but an early grave may be the shortest way to heaven. Tryon Edwards
We were so close to being one of the actual victems. It makes you feel humble. Robert Lee Bedker-Vietnam war vetran mistakenly listed as killed in action on the Vietnam War Memorial in Washington, 1996
We were two and had but one heart between us. Franois Villon
We were unanimous - in fact everyone was unanimous.
We will get along fine as soon as you realize that I'm Go
We will, we will, Pun you!
We won't need reservations.| Famous last words
We'd all like t' vote fer th' best man, but he's never a candidate. Kin Hubbard
We'll be back to Nick Danger after this message.
We'll get along fine as soon as you realize I'm God.
We'll get along fine as soon as you realize that I'm God
We'll give you piece de resistance and a tour de force
We'll have solar power when the power companies develop a sunbeam metre.
We'll pivot at warp 2 and bring all tubes to bear, Mr. Sulu.
We'll remove any stain&sew up the hole -Laundram
We'll take the stairs.
We're all bozos on this bus.
We're all going down the same road in different directions.
We're all human and we all goof. Do things that may be wrong, but do something. Newt Gingrich, US Congressman and House Speaker, 1989
We're all over it, like a cheap suit.
We're all part of the human race but racing faster won't make us more human.
We're as similar as two disimilar things in a pod.
We're going to have the best-educated American people in the world. | Senator Dan Quayle
We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're having a swan. You get more stuffing.
We're kick'n some ASCII now
We're lost, but we're making good time.
We're not saying we're SMARTER than Normals.  We're saying we're BETTER.
We're off to see the wizard....
We're sorry, but reality is not in service at this time.
We're staying together for the sake of the cats.|Bumper sticker
We're the party that wants to see an America in which people can still get rich. Ronald Reagan
We, and all others who believe in freedom as deeply as we do, would rather die on our feet than live on our knees. Franklin Delano Roosevelt
We, the unwilling, led by the unknowing, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. Anonymous
Weak things united become strong.
Wealth and want equally harden the human heart. Theodore Parker
Wealth is not his that has it, but his that enjoys it. -- Poor Richard.
Wealth is not his that has it, but his that enjoys it. Benjamin Franklin
Wealth is not his who has it but his who enjoys it. Benjamin Franklin
Wear a smile and have friends; wear a scowl and have wrinkles. What do we live for if not to make the world less difficult for each other? George Eliot
Wear old clothes when you fight for truth and liberty.
Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
Weather's here; wish you were beautiful.
Websters : recursive. Adj. see recursive.
Wed in haste, repent in leasure.
Wedding is destiny, and hanging likewise.
Wedding rings: the world's smallest handcuffs.
Wedding: A funeral where you smell your own flowers.
Weekend, where are you?
Weeping, I wake; waking, I weep, I weep.
Welcome death, quoth the rat, when the trap fell. Thomas Fuller
Welcome to New Zealand, set your watch back 20 years.
Welcome to President Bush, Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts. | Dan Quayle addressing the anniversary of the moon landing
Welcome to Texas...now GIT!
Welcome to The Machine.
Welcome to last years meeting of the Procrastinators Club
Welcome to the Future It's just starting now ...
Welcome to the Future!	It's just starting now ...
Welcome to the only nice motel in town.
Welcome. Today will be one hell of a week.
Welfare and TV are today's bread and circuses.
Well I know where she come from but I don't know what's her name
Well I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to shoot you.
Well begun is half done Proverb
Well begun is half done.
Well cover me in egg & flour and bake me for 14 minutes
Well done is better than well said.
Well done is better than well said. Anonymous
Well done is better than well said.| Ben Franklin
Well, I couldn't figure out this subtraction problem, so I put "Atlanta, Georgia"
Well, I did a backup three weeks ago...
Well, it's got *some* rat in it.
Well, pluck me naked as a scalded chicken
Well, pluck me naked as a scalded chicken!
Well, stap me, I seem to have come out without my duck.
Well, you know when you're rocking in a rocking chair, and you go so far that you almost fall over backwards, but at the last instant you catch yourself? That's how I feel all the time. Stephen Wright
Well, your raster disolved your bitmap.....
Well-married, a man is winged: ill-matched, he is shackled. Henry Ward Beecher
Well...my cray is in the shop.
Were it offered to my choice, I should have no objection to a repetition of the same life from its beginning, only asking the advantages authors have in a second edition to correct some faults in the first. Benjamin Franklin
Wernher von Braun settled for a V2 when he coulda had a V8.
Wesley Crusher, please report to airlock 5
Wesley Crusher, please report to the torpedo tubes, immediately!
Wesley's temper tantrum: "I want a new universe for Xmas"
Wesley, go clean out the photon torpedo tube * Picard
Wesley: "Uncle Picard, what means "WARP CORE BREACH" on this display?"
Whadda ya mean, "we"?
Whadda ya want for nothin'?  Rubber biscuit?
Whaddya mean you don't STAPLE diskette labels on?
Wharbat darbid yarbou sarbay?
What Are You Looking For?  Nothing's Here
What CAN you get a nudist for Christmas?
What GUI ? I don't see anyone !
What Greenhouse Effect? Hey, is it warm in here or what?
What I gave, I have; what I spent, I had; what I kept, I lost. Old Epitaph
What I have to say is far more important than how long my eyelashes are. Alanis Morissette, singer, 1995
What I need is to mind-meld with this mach.
What I ought to do, I can; if I can, why don't I?
What I say or do here won't matter much, nor should it. Dan Rather-journalist, University of Texas, Austin Graduation, 1995
What a beautiful day
What a blind person needs is not a teacher but another self. Helen Keller
What a bundle of laughs.
What a day may bring, a day may take away.
What a friend we have in cheeses.
What a glorious way of spending an evening
What a good thing Adam hadwhen he said a good thing, he knew nobody had said it before. Mark Twain
What a long, strange trip it's been
What a lot we lost when we stopped writing letters. You can't reread a phone call. Liz Carpenter
What a lovely world it is that has women in it !
What a lovely world it is that has women in it ! (R. A. H.)
What a lovely world it is that has women in it!
What a man misses mostly in heaven is company. Mark Twain
What a pity the only way to heaven is in a hearse. Stanislaw J. Lec
What a success today has been.
What a waste it is to lose one's mind-or not to have a mind. How true that is. Dan Quayle, IN senator and US vice president, 1989
What a waste it is to lose one's mind.  Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful.  How true that is. | Vice President Dan Quayle
What an enormous magnifier is tradition! How a thing grows in the human memory and in the human imagination, when love, worship, and all that lies in the human heart, is there to encourage it. Thomas Carlyle
What are fiends for? - Richard Nixon
What are the instructions doing in the trash??
What are you doing ??? The message is over, GO AWAY !!!
What are you gonna do? Bleed on me?
What can possibly go wrong?
What can you do at 3 AM?   Psssttt - got a modem??
What can you do at 3 AM?  PSSSTTT - got a modem?
What can you do for me?
What care I how time advances: I am drinking ale today.
What color is a chameleon on a mirror ?
What could possibly go wrong.
What did Mickey Mouse get for Christmas ? A Dan Quayle watch
What did you get on your IQ test, drool?
What do batteries run on?
What do you call a female clown? A Clunt :-)
What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose? Full!
What do you expect ? This is California !
What do you feed a Trojan horse? A latex lollipop!
What do you like for breakfast?|Pick up line
What do you mean that 2 years have passed??
What do you mean you "formated" the cat??
What does this button do?...
What does this red button do?
What else can you do at 3:00am?
What food processors do to food, word processors do to words.
What fools these morals be!
What fools these mortals be.
What frenzy dictates, jealousy believes. John Gay
What garlic is to salad, insanity is to art.
What goes up hs probably been doused with petrol.
What good does it do an ass to be called a lion?
What good grammar you got. What school you went ?
What good would a religion be without its hypocrisy?
What grammar is to speech, logic is to reason.
What happened to my CUBBIES?
What happened to my tagline?
What happens if I decrement the user count? (scream in the distance)
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
What happens if you touch these two wires tog-- | Famous last words
What happens to the hole when the cheese is gone?
What happens when fish trip?
What happens when you cut back the jungle? It recedes.
What has four legs and an arm? A happy pitbull.
What has puzzled us before seems less mysterious, and the crooked paths look straighter as we approach the end. Jean Paul Richter
What if all this were real ?
What if there were no hypothetical situations?
What is Kuwaits main product was Brocolli?
What is Life?  It's the cereal Mikey likes.
What is Slack?  If you don't know, then I can't explain it to you. However, I can offer a clue: Nirvana and ecstasy look like sheer torture when compared to Slack.
What is a magician but a practising theorist?| Obi-Wan Kenobi
What is a man born for but to be a reformer, a remaker of what has been made, a denouncer of lies, a restorer of truth and good? Ralph Waldo Emerson
What is all this about violins on television?
What is called resignation is confirmed desperation. Henry David Thoreau
What is crime amongst the multitude, is only vice among the few. Benjamin Disraeli
What is defeat? Nothing but education, nothing but the first step to something better. Wendell Phillips
What is done by night appears by day.
What is food to one, is to others bitter poison |Lucretius
What is food to one, it to others bitter poison.
What is history but a fable agreed upon? Napoleon Bonaparte
What is it: is man only a blunder of God, or God only a blunder of man? Friedrich Nietzsche
What is learned in youth is understood in age.
What is mine is mine, yours is negotiable.
What is more difficult, to think of an encampment on the moon or of Harlem rebuilt? Both are now within the reach of our resources. Both now depend upon human decision and human will. Adlai E. Stevenson
What is now proved was once only imagined. William Blake
What is required is sight and insight - then you might add one more: excite. Robert Frost
What is sad for women of my generation is that they weren't supposed to work if they had families. What were they going to do when the children are grown, watch the raindrops coming down the window pane? Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis
What is the True meaning of DOS?
What is the avg. air speed of an un-laden swallow?
What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin. Mark Twain
What is the function that a clergyman performs in the world? Answer: he gets his living by assuring idiots that he can save them from an imaginary hell. It's a business almost indistinguishable from that of a seller of snake-oil for rheumatism. H. L. Mencken (Minority Report, 1956)
What is the half-life of a television set?
What is the meaning of life in 50 words or less ?
What is the use of straining after an amiable view of things, when a cynical view is most likely to be the true one? George Bernard Shaw
What is the world to a man when his wife is a widow?
What is there to complain about?
What is this true meditation? It is to make everything: coughing, swallowing, waving the arms, motion, stillness, words, action, the evil and the good, prosperity and shame, gain and loss, right and wrong, into one single koan. Hakuin
What is worth doing is worth doing for money.
What is worth doing is worth overdoing.
What is worth doing is worth the trouble of asking somebody to do it.
What is worth doing is worth the trouble of asking somebody to do.
What is worth doing is worth the trouble of asking someone else to do.
What it is, is what it is
What kills a skunk is the publicity it gives itself Abraham Lincoln
What lies behind us and lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us. Ralph Waldo Emerson
What loneliness is more lonely than distrust? George Eliot
What lovely weather
What madness it is for a man to starve himself to enrich his heir, and so turn a friend into an enemy! For his joy at your death will be proportioned to what you leave him. Seneca
What maintains one vice would bring up two children. Benjamin Franklin
What makes Teflon stick to the pan?
What makes the universe so hard to comprehend is that there's nothing to compare it with.
What makes us so bitter against people who outwit us is that they think themselves cleverer than we are.
What man doesn't like to stare once in a while? | O'Brien
What man knows is everywhere at war with what heants. Joseph Wood Krutch
What many orators lack in depth they give you in length.
What may be done at any time will be done at no time. Scottish Proverb
What may be, may not be.
What men prize most is a privilege, even if it be that of chief mourner at a funeral. James Russell Lowell
What men usually ask for when they pray to God is, that two and two may not make four. Russian Proverb
What more could a man ask for?
What no spouse of a writer can ever understand is that a writer is working when he's staring out the window.
What one does to weeds and grasses.
What orators lack in depth they make up in length.
What orators lack in depth, they make up in length.
What others perceive as being evil, you perceive as being really funny.
What part of "ten-line limit" don't you understand? ~
What part of NO didn't you understand ?
What passes for woman's intuition is often nothing more than man's transparency.
What people say behind your back is your standing in the community. Ed Howe
What really matters is what you do with what you have. Shirly Lord
What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?
What seems to be generosity is often no more than disguised ambition, which overlooks a small interest in order to secure a great one. Franois de la Rochefoucauld
What sin has not been committed in the name of efficiency?
What soberness conceals, drunkenness reveals.
What soon grows old?  Gratitude.
What soon grows old?  Gratitude. | Aristotle
What the American public wants in the theater is a tragedy with a happy ending. William D. Howells
What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds. Will Rogers
What the fool does in the end, the wise man does in the beginning. Proverb
What the heart thinks, the tongue speaks. Romanian Proverb
What the heck happened here??!!
What the hell, go ahead and put all your eggs in one basket.
What the large print giveth, the small print taketh away.
What the people believe is true. Native American Proverb (Anishinabe)
What the world calls originality is only an unaccustomed method of tickling it. George Bernard Shaw
What the world needs is an electric match.
What the world really needs is more love and less paperwork. Pearl Bailey, singer
What this country needs is a dime that will buy a good five cent bagel.
What this country needs is a dime that will buy a good five-cent bagel.
What this country needs is a good five cent microcomputer.
What this country needs is a good five cent nickel.
What this country needs is a good five-cent Nickel. Franklin P. Adams
What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel.
What this country needs is more unemployed politicians.
What this world needs is a good five-dollar plasma weapon.
What was hard to endure is sweet to recall. French Proverb
What was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread?
What we DON'T need is more laws !
What we anticipate seldom occurs, what we least expected generally happens. Benjamin Disraeli
What we call despair is often only the painful eagerness of unfed hope. George Eliot
What we call real estatethe solid ground to build a house onis the broad foundation on which nearly all the guilt of this world rests. Nathaniel Hawthorne
What we have done for ourselves alone dies with us; what we have done for others and the world remains and is immortal. Albert Pike
What we have here is a failure to communicate.
What we hope ever to do with ease, we must learn first to do with diligence. Samuel Johnson
What we learn after we know it all is what counts.
What we learn from history is that we do not learn from history.
What we need most, is not so much to realize the ideal as to idealize the real. H. F. Hedge
What we obtain too cheap we esteem too little; it is dearness only that gives everything its value. Thomas Paine
What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly; it is dearness only that gives everything its value. Thomas Paine
What we want is to see the child in pursuit of knowledge, and not knowledge in pursuit of the child. George Bernard Shaw
What will be, will be Proverb
What will we all do when the trial is over? Dick Clark, ageless music promoter, 1995
What wisdom can you find that is greater than kindness?
What would McGyver do now?
What you are, not what you have, is what makes you rich.
What you cannot enforce, do not command. Socrates
What you do not want done to you, do not do to others.
What you do speaks so loud that I cannot hear what you say. Ralph Waldo Emerson
What you do when you don't have to, determines what you will be when you can no longer help it. Rudyard Kipling
What you don't do is always more important than what you do.
What you don't know will always hurt you. First Law of Blissful Ignorance
What you don't see with your eyes, don't invent with your mouth. Jewish Proverb
What you enjoy is much more important than what you have.
What you give you get, ten times over. Yoruba Proverb
What you have become is the price you paid to get what you used to want. Mignon McLaughlin
What you have in your mind, your talents, your native abilities, no one can take from you. When you die you take them with you. Use them diligently while you are here. Alfred A. Montapert
What you learn to your cost you remember long.
What you need is love potion #9.
What you see can depend on what you look for.
What you teach your own children is what you really believe in. Cathy Warner Weatherford
What youth deemed crystal, age finds was dew.
What's 20,000 lawyers rotting in a swamp ? A GOOD START !
What's Irish and stays out all night? Pati O'furniture.
What's all this brouhaha?
What's all this talk about hellfire & Dalmations?
What's another word for "thesaurus"?
What's another word for "thesaurus?"
What's another word for Thesaurus?
What's another word for Thesaurus? Stephen Wright
What's brown and sticky? A stick!
What's done to children, they will do to society.
What's in a Name?
What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. William Shakespeare
What's shorter then a weekend?  A Vacation.
What's so funny?
What's the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow?
What's the difference between a duck?
What's the sound a name makes when it's dropped? What was sliced bread the greatest thing since? When all is said and done, more is said than done. Anonymous
What's with the wierd Starship symbol sir?  Volkswagen Class.
What's worth doing is worth doing for money.
What, me worry?
What? Me Worry?
Whatever America hopes to bring to pass in the world must first come to pass in the heart of America., from his Inaugural address 1/20/53 Dwight D. Eisenhower
Whatever a man seeks, honors, or exalts more than God, this is the god of his idolatry. William B. Ullathorne
Whatever happened to "Why is the sky blue?"
Whatever happened to the good old days when sex was dirty and the air was clean?
Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
Whatever is done without ostentation, and without the people being witnesses of it, is, in my opinion, most praiseworthy: not that the public eye should be entirely avoided, for good actions desire to be placed in the light; but notwithstanding this, the greatest theater for virtue is conscience.Cicero
Whatever is popular deserves attention. James Mackintosh
Whatever is well conceived can be well expressed.
Whatever it is, I fear Greeks even when they bring gifts.
Whatever it is, I'm against it! - Groucho Marx
Whatever misfortune may be your lot, it could only be worse in Cleveland.
Whatever the human law may be, neither an individual nor a nation can commit the least act of injustice against the obscurest individual without having to pay the penalty for it. Henry David Thoreau
Whatever you are, be a good one. Abraham Lincoln
Whatever you can do, or believe you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Goethe
Whatever you cannot understand, you cannot possess. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Whatever you do, you'll regret it.
Whatever you say about pornography, sex is here to stray.
Whatever you want to do, you have to do something else first.
Whats the world coming to ? A dead end...
Wheaties and beer: the Breakfast of ex-champions.
When 911 won't work .357 will!
When God endowed human beings with brains, He did not intend to guarantee them.
When I am dead, I hope it may be said: 'His sins were scarlet, but his books were read.' Hilaire Belloc
When I die, I'm leaving my body to Science Fiction.
When I examine myself and my methods of thought, I come to the conclusion that the gift of fantasy has meant more to me than my talent for absorbing positive knowledge. Albert Einstein
When I first started work I dreamed of earing the salary I'm starving on now.
When I gave food to the poor, they called me a saint. When I asked why the poor were hungry, they called me a communist. Dom Helder Camara (Brazilian Bishop)
When I gave her the ring, she gave me the finger.
When I get that feeling, I need sexual healing| Marvin Gaye
When I hear music, I fear no danger. I am invulnerable. I see no foe. I am related to the earliest times, and to the latest. Henry David Thoreau
When I lay an egg, I stand back and admire it!
When I left this ship. It was in one piece. * Picard
When I reflect upon the number of disagreeable people who I know have gone to a better world, I am moved to lead a different life.
When I see a bird that walks like a duck and swims like a duck and quacks like a duck, I call that bird a duck. Richard Cardinal Cushing
When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me.' Erma Bombeck
When I talk to myself, I'm talkin' to the wrong person.
When I turned two I was really anxious, because I'd doubled my age in a year. I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I'm six I'll be ninety. Stephen Wright
When I want your opinion I'll beat it out of you...
When I want your opinion I'll give it to you
When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe. Clarence Darrow
When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years. Mark Twain
When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years. Mark Twain
When I was a kid, I was an imaginary playmate.
When I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, 'Do you have any toy train schedules?' Stephen Wright
When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child...eventually. Stephen Wright
When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me. I said, 'Well, what do you need?' Stephen Wright
When I was eight, I played Little League. I was on first; I stole third; I went straight across. Earlier that week, I learned that the shortest distance between two points was a straight line. I took advantage of that knowledge. Stephen Wright
When I was little, my grandfather used to make me stand in a closet for five minutes without moving. He said it was elevator practice. Stephen Wright
When I was young I observed that nine out of every ten things I did were failures, so I did ten times more work. George Bernard Shaw
When I was young I was sure of everything; in a few years, having been mistaken a thousand times, I was not half so sure of most things as I was before; at present, I am hardly sure of anything but what God has revealed to me. John Wesley
When I was your age we carved our transistors out of wood
When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good?' I said, 'No, I made a few mistakes.' Stephen Wright
When I'm good, I'm very good. But when I'm bad I'm better. | Mae West
When I'm good, I'm very good; but when I'm bad, I'm better.
When I'm not thanked at all I'm thanked enough. Henry Fielding
When Kip Compton is found, the check is in the....
When Nature has work to be done, she creates a genius to do it. Ralph Waldo Emerson
When PIG's fly they will be called PIGeons
When Solomon said that there was a time and a place for everything he had not encountered the problem of parking an automobile. Bob Edwards
When a blind man carries a lame man, both go forward. Swedish proverb
When a distinguished but elderly scientist states that something is possible, he is almost certainly right. When he states that something is impossible, he is very probably wrong. Clarke's First Law
When a fellow says, "It ain't the money but the principle of the thing," it's the money.| Kim Hubbard
When a fellow tells me he's bipartisan, I know he's going to vote against me. Harry S. Truman
When a friend is in trouble, don't annoy him by asking if there is anything you can do. Think up something appropriate and do it. E. W. Howe
When a girl ceases to blush, she has lost the most powerful charm of her beauty. Gregory I
When a hammer is the only tool, every problem looks like a nail.
When a man asks himself what is meant by action he proves that he isn't a man of action. Action is a lack of balance. In order to act you must be somewhat insane. A reasonably sensible man is satisfied with thinking. Georges Clemenceau
When a man becomes familiar with his goddess, she quickly sinks into a woman. Joseph Addison
When a man has no reason to trust himself, he trusts in luck. Ed Howe
When a man has not a good reason for doing a thing, he has one good reason for letting it alone. Thomas Scott
When a man is down everyone runs over him.
When a man is out of sight, it is not too long before he is out of mind. Thomas  Kempis
When a man lies he murders part of the world.
When a man says money can't do anything, that settles it.. he hasn't any.
When a man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute. But let him sit on a hot stove for a minuteand it's longer than any hour. That's relativity. Albert Einstein
When a man tells you what people are saying about you, tell him what people are saying about him; that will immediately take his mind off your troubles. E. W. Howe
When a man's dog turns against him it is time for a wife to pack her trunk and go home to mama. Mark Twain
When a man's knowledge is not in order, the more of it he has the greater will be his confusion. Herbert Spencer, (1820,1903)
When a man's wife learns to understand him, she stops listening to him.
When a person cannot deceive himself the chances are against his being able to deceive other people. Mark Twain
When a person is down in the world, an ounce of help is better than a pound of preaching. Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton
When a thing has been said and said well, have no scruple. Take it and copy it. Anatole France
When a thing is done, advice comes too late. Romanian Proverb
When a true genius appears in this world you may know him by the sign that the dunces are all in confederacy against him. Jonathan Swift
When a virtuous man is raised, it brings gladness to his friends, grief to his enemies, and glory to his posterity. Ben Jonson
When a woman is talking to you, listen to what she says with her eyes. Victor Hugo
When a young man begins to go down hill everything seems to be greased for the occasion. Josh Billings
When all else fails, READ THE DOCS !
When all else fails, RTFM.
When all else fails, blame it on Dan.
When all else fails, blame it on the guy next to you
When all else fails, blame it on the guy next to you!
When all else fails, read the directions.
When all else fails, read the docs.
When all else fails, read the instructions.
When all else fails, read the manual.
When all else fails, take a nap
When all else is lost, the future still remains.
When all else is lost, the future still remains. Christian Nestell Bovee
When all is said and done more will be said than done.
When all is said and done, then shut up
When all think alike, then no one is thinking.
When an agnostic dies, does he go to the Great Perhaps?
When an elephant is in trouble even a frog will kick him. Hindu Proverb
When an oyster is irritated, it makes a pearl.
When anger rises, think of the consequences. Confucius
When angry, count four; when very angry, swear.
When angry, count four; when very angry, swear. Mark Twain
When angry, count ten before you speak; if very angry, one hundred. Thomas Jefferson
When angry, count to ten; when very angry, count to a hundred.
When are you joining reality?
When asked "What is a friend," Zeno ans'd "Another I."
When boasting ends, there dignity begins. Owen D. Young
When chickens quit quarrelling over their food they often find that there is enough for all of them. I wonder if it might not be the same with the human race. Don Marquis
When choosing between two evils I always like to take the one I've never tried before. Mae West, american actress
When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.
When choosing between two evils, always try the one you have never tried before.
When choosing between two evils, select the newer one.
When cryptography is outlawed, bayl bhgynjf jvyy unir cevinpl!
When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudice, and motivated by pride and vanity. Dale Carnegie
When eating bamboo sprouts, remember the man who planted them. Chinese Proverb
When everybody is somebody, then nobody is anybody.
When everyone thinks alike, then everyone is stupid.
When faith & hope fail try charity - it's love in action.
When faith is lost, when honor dies, the man is dead! John Greenleaf Whittier
When faith is lost, when honor dies, the man is dead. John Greenleaf Whittier
When fate hands us a lemon, let's try to make a lemonade. Dale Carnegie
When firmness is sufficient, rashness is unnecessary. Napoleon Bonaparte
When force is necessary, it must be applied boldly, decisively and completely. But one must know the limitations of force; one must know when to blend force with a maneuver, the blow with an agreement. Leon Trotsky
When friends ask, there is no tomorrow. Miscellaneous Proverb
When good Americans die they go to Paris. When bad Americans die they go to America. Oscar Wilde
When governments fall, people like me are lined up & shot.
When he first ran for office, he appealed to the voters: 'I never stole anything in my life. All I ask is a chance.' Anon.
When human power becomes so great and original that we can account for it only as a kind of divine imagination, we call it genius. William Crashaw
When in Rome, do as the Romans do Proverb
When in Rome... romance !
When in charge, ponder. When in doubt, mumble. When in trouble, delegate.
When in danger, when in doubt, run in circles, yell & shout !
When in danger,when in doubt,run in circles,yell & shout
When in doubt fire photons!
When in doubt, Gallop! Proverb of the French Foreign Legion
When in doubt, do as the doubters do.
When in doubt, do what the President does -- guess.
When in doubt, fire photons !
When in doubt, follow your heart.
When in doubt, lead trump.
When in doubt, leave out the adjective.
When in doubt, mumble
When in doubt, mumble.
When in doubt, mumble.	When in trouble, delegate.  When in charge, ponder.
When in doubt, mumble. When in trouble, delegate!
When in doubt, mumble. When in trouble, delegate.  When in charge, ponder.
When in doubt, predict that the present trend will continue.
When in doubt, take all the defaults.
When in doubt, tell the truth. Mark Twain
When in doubt, think.
When in doubt, worry.
When in doubt... RTFM !
When in doubt; Cheat!
When inlaws are outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws.
When it comes to getting things done, we need fewer architects and more bricklayers. Colleen C. Barrett
When it comes to giving, some people stop at nothing.
When it comes to humility, I'm the very BEST there is
When it rains, it pours Proverb
When it rains, it pours.
When it rains... it pours !
When lying, be emphatic and indignant, thus behaving like your children. William Feather
When man learns to understand and control his own behavior as well as he is learning to understand and control the behavior of crop plants and domestic animals, he may be justified in believing that he has become civilized. E. G. Stakman
When marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws.
When men have gone so far as to talk as though their idols have come to life, it is time that someone broke them. Richard H. Tawney
When men yield up the privilege of thinking, the last shadow of liberty quits the horizon. Thomas Paine
When money speaks, truth keeps silent.
When money talks there are few interruptions.
When music fails to agree to the ear, to soothe the ear and the heart and the senses, then it has missed its point. Maria Callas
When my mind wanders away, I'm left sitting here.
When need is greatest help is nearest.
When no wind blows, even the weather vane has character.
When nothing can possibly go wrong, it will.
When on a roll, should you be concerned or jelly-filled?
When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us. Alexander Graham Bell, american inventor
When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us. Helen Keller
When one shuts one eye, one does not hear everything. Swiss Proverb
When our hatred is violent, it sinks us even beneath those we hate. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
When our vices have left us we flatter ourselves that we have left them. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
When people are bewildered they tend to become credulous. Calvin Coolidge
When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other. Eric Hoffer
When people share their fears with you, share some courage.
When people speak to you about a preventive war, you tell them to go and fight it. After my experience, I have come to hate war. War settles nothing. Dwight D. Eisenhower
When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen. Ernest Hemingway
When planning for posterity, we must remember that virtue is not hereditary.
When policy fails, try thinking.
When possible make the decisions now, even if action is in the future. A reviewed decision usually is better than one reached at the last moment. William B. Given, Jr.
When poverty knocks at the door, love flies out the window.
When power leads man toward arrogance, poetry reminds him of his limitations. When power narrows the areas of man's concern, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of his existence. When power corrupts, poetry cleanses. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
When prosperity comes, do not use all of it. Confucius
When puns are outlawed only outlaws will have puns.
When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.
When riding dragons, don't let your mind go blank.
When shooting a mime, do you need a silencer?
When someone does something good, Applaud! You will make two people happy. Samuel Goldwyn
When speculation has done its worst, two and two still make four. Samuel Johnson
When spiders unite they can tie down a lion. Ethiopian Proverb
When talking nonsense try not to be serious.
When the Czar has a cold all Russia coughs. Russian Proverb
When the People lead, the "Leaders" will follow.
When the bad combine, the good must associate.
When the blind lead the blind they will both fall over the cliff.
When the chips are down, the buffalo's empty.
When the fox preaches, look to the geese. German Proverb
When the gods wish to punish us, they answer our prayers.
When the going gets tough, everybody leaves.
When the going gets tough... The tough go drinking.
When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.
When the igloo is rocking, don't bother knocking!
When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time. The Airplane Law
When the plane you're on is late, the plane you need to transfer to is on time.
When the plane you're on is late, your connecting flight is on time.
When the sun shineth, make hay.
When the tide of life turns against you And the current upsets your boat Don't waste tears on what might have been Just lie on your back and float. Anonymous
When the weight of the paperwork equals the weight of the airplane, the plane will fly. -- Donald Douglas.
When the well is dry we know the worth of water.
When the wind is great, bow before it; when the wind is heavy, yield to it.
When the wind is southerly, I know a hawk from a handsaw.
When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you. African Proverb
When there's marriage without love, there will be love without marriage. -- Poor Richard.
When they are alone they want to be with others, and when they are with others they want to be alone. After all, human beings are like that. Gertrude Stein
When things are going well, something will go wrong.
When things can't get worse, they will.
When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper. Andy Rooney
When travelling down the freeway, the first bug to hit a clean windshield will always land directly in front of the driver's face. Quigley's Law of Highway Driving
When truth entails tremendous ruin, lies are pardoned.
When two men in a business always agree, one of them is unnecessary.
When two men in business always agree, one of them is unnecessary.
When two men in business always agree, one of them is unnecessary. William Wrigley, Jr.
When two quarrel, both are to blame. Dutch Proverb
When uncertain, or in doubt, run in circles and scream.
When using PCs, ALWAYS anticipate problems.
When war is declared, Truth is the first casualty. Arthur Ponsonby
When we are flat on our backs there is no way to look but up. Roger W. Babson
When we are not sure, we are alive.
When we are out of sympathy with the young, then I think our work in this world is over. George MacDonald
When we can't dream the time for death has arrived.
When we cannot get what we love, we must love what is within our reach. French Proverb
When we disclaim praise, it is only showing our desire to be praised a second time. Franois de La Rochefoucauld
When we escaped from Cuba, all we could carry was our education. Alicia Coro
When we know what God is, we shall be gods ourselves. George Bernard Shaw
When we lose the right to be different, we lose the privilege to be free. Charles Evans Hughes
When we quarrel, how we wish we had been blameless! Ralph Waldo Emerson
When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained. Mark Twain
When we walk to the edge of all the light we have and take the step into the darkness of the unknown, we must believe that one of two things will happen. There will be something solid for us to stand on or we will be taught to fly. Patrick Overton
When wealth is lost, nothing is lost; when health is lost, something is lost; when character is lost, all is lost. German Motto
When white and black and brown and every other color decide they're going to live together as Christians, then and only then are we going to see an end to these troubles. Barry M. Goldwater
When will you realize Vienna waits for you?
When working a problem, it helps to know the answer.
When working toward the solution of a problem, it always helps if you know the answer. Rule of Accuracy
When written in Chinese, the word 'crisis' is composed of two characters. One represents danger and the other represents opportunity. John F. Kennedy
When you ain't got nothin', you got nothin' to lose.
When you are ill make haste to forgive your enemies, for you may recover. AmAmbrose Bierce
When you are in a peach orchard, don't look for turnips.
When you are in it up to your ears, keep your mouth shut.
When you are in trouble, people who call to sympathize are really looking for the particulars. Ed Howe
When you are over the hill, you pick up speed.
When you are right, you cannot be too radical; When you are wrong, you cannot be too conservative. Martin Luther King, Jr.
When you are served a meal aboard an aircraft, the aircraft will encounter turbulence. Gunter's First Law of Air Travel
When you are used to never being alone, you may consider yourself Americanized.
When you become used to never being alone, you may consider yourself Americanized.
When you belong to a minority, you have to be better in order to have the right to be equal. Christiane Collage
When you breathe you inspire, when you don't... you expire.
When you breathe you inspire. When you don't breathe you expire.
When you can't do anything else to a boy, you can make him wash his face. Ed Howe
When you can't make it GOOD, make it BIG!
When you cannot get a compliment any other way, pay yourself one. Mark Twain
When you cannot make up your mind which of two evenly balanced courses of action you should takechoose the bolder. W. J. Slim
When you choose the lesser of two evils, always remember that it is still an evil. Max Lerner
When you come to a fork in the road, take it!
When you dig another out of trouble, you've got a place to bury your own.
When you discover you are dead, avoid driving a car.
When you do not know what you are doing, do it neatly.|
When you do something, you should burn yourself up completely, like a good bonfire, leaving no trace of yourself. Shunryu Suzuka
When you don't have an education, you've got to use your brains. Anonymous
When you eat, the meal is yourself. Zen Saying
When you finally discover all of Life's answers, they'll change the questions.
When you finally see light at the end of the tunnel, it will probably be a train coming toward you.
When you find anything that works, it usually fails.
When you get a thing the way you want it, leave it alone. Winston Churchill
When you get killed you lose an important part of your life.| Brooke Shields
When you get too big a majority, you're immediately in trouble. Sam Rayburn
When you get what you want you don't want it as much.
When you go far enough, you'll meet yourself.
When you go on a diet, the first thing you lose is your temper.
When you go out to buy, don't show your silver.
When you go to buy, use your eyes, not your ears. Czech Proverb
When you go to the market, use your eyes, not your ears.
When you have a number of disagreeable duties to perform, always do the most disagreeable first. Josiah Quincy
When you have got an elephant by the hind legs and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run. Abraham Lincoln
When you have mastered numbers, you will in fact no longer be reading numbers, any more than you read words when reading books. You will be reading meanings. Harold Geneen, from Managing,
When you have no choice, mobilize the spirit of courage. Jewish Proverb
When you have only two pennies left in the world, buy a loaf of bread with one, and a lily with the other. Chinese Proverb
When you have sour cream every problem looks like a potato.
When you have spoken the word, it reigns over you. When it is unspoken you reign over it. Arabian Proverb
When you have to make a choice and don't make it, that in itself is a choice. William James
When you hire people who are smarter than you are, you prove you are smarter than they are.| R.H. Grant
When you kill time you murder success.
When you know, you know; when you don't know, admit it.
When you listen to fools, the MOB rules!
When you make your mark in the world, watch out for guys with erasers.
When you meet a man, you judge him by his clothes; when you leave, you judge him by his heart. Russian Proverb
When you mention something, if it's bad, it happens, if it's good, it goes away
When you pass through, no one can pin you down, no one can call you back. Ying-An
When you play, play hard; when you work, don't play at all. Theodore Rooseveldt
When you see a snake, never mind where he came from.
When you see a snake, never mind where he came from. W.G. Benham
When you set out to do something, something else must then be done first.
When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last.
When you throw dirt, you lose ground. Texan Proverb
When you walk through the storm, hold your head up high.  And climb a tree while holding a crow bar over your head.
When you want to fool the world, tell the truth. Otto von Bismarck
When you want to test the depths of a stream, don't use both feet. Chinese Proverb
When you're as great as I am, it's hard to be humble. Muhammad Ali
When you're flying through the air, remember to roll when you hit  the ground. | Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
When you're in command, command.
When you're over the hill, you pick up speed.
When you're through changing, you're through.
When you're up to your ears, keep your mouth shut.
When you've got them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.
When your computer has a virus, DON'T use chicken soup
When your dreams turn to dust, vacuum. Anonymous
When your only tool is a hammer, you tend to treat everything you find like a nail.
When your opponent is down, kick him.
When your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt.
When your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt. Henry J. Kaiser
When yu' can't have what you choose, yu' just choose what you have. Owen Wister
Whenan to man shall be friend and brother. Gerald Massey
Whenever I date a guy, I think, is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with? Rita Rudner
Whenever I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes.
Whenever I get a grip on reality, the handle falls off.
Whenever I hear anyone arguing for slavery, I feel a strong impulse to see it tired on him personally. Abraham Lincoln
Whenever I hear the word Culture, I reach for my revolver.
Whenever Possible, Put People On Hold
Whenever a man seeks your advice he generally seeks your praise. Lord Chesterfield
Whenever a separation is made between liberty and justice, neither, in my opinion, is safe. Edmund Burke
Whenever a system becomes completely defined, someone discovers something which either abolishes the system or expands it beyond recognition. Brooke's Law
Whenever man commits a crime heaven finds a witness. Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton
Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong.| Oscar Wilde
Whenever the Canon is fired, it shoots out a YATI.
Whenever the people are well informed, they can be trusted with their own government; that whenever things get so far wrong as to attract their notice, they may be relied on to set them to rights. Thomas Jefferson
Whenever you are asked if you can do a job, tell 'em, 'Certainly, I can!' Then get busy and find out how to do it. Theodore Roosevelt
Whenever you are sincerely pleased you are nourished. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Whenever you find humor, you find pathos close by his side. Edwin Percy Whipple
Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform. Mark Twain
Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform.| Mark Twain
Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect. Mark Twain
Whenever you learn all the answers, they change all the questions.
Whenever you set out to do something, something else must be done first.
WherE Did KLingonS leArn to CapitaLize?
Where God has his church the Devil will have his chapel. Spanish Proverb
Where am I ? And why am I in this handbasket ?
Where am I and who are these strange people?
Where am I going? And why am I in this handbasket?
Where annual elections end, there slavery begins. John Quincy Adams
Where are those flashbacks they promised me?
Where are we going?  And why am I in this handbasket?
Where are we going?  And why are we in this handbasket?
Where are we going? And why are we in this handbasket?
Where are we going?... and why am I in this handbasket?
Where are we?
Where can I get one of those computer bats!!
Where do honey bees go potty?  At a BP station naturally.
Where does the fire go when the fire goes out?
Where ever Yugo, I go.
Where everything is bad it must be good to know the worst. Francis H. Bradley
Where ignorance is bliss 'tis folly to be wise. Thomas Gray
Where in the world does the guy who has everything put it?
Where is "Old" Zealand?
Where is the tagline supposed to go???
Where law ends, there tyranny begins.
Where liberty is, there is my country. Benjamin Franklin
Where others fail...666 WORKS!!!
Where quality is just a word we like to use.
Where quality is the thing sought after, the thing of supreme quality is cheap, whatever the price one has to pay for it. William James
Where secrecy or mystery begins, vice or roguery is not far off. Samuel Johnson
Where the heck is the ANY key????
Where the hell is /usr/hippo?
Where the hell is Omak?
Where the hell is Wall Drug?
Where the system is concerned, you're not allowed to ask "Why?".
Where there are no swamps there are no frogs. German Proverb
Where there is a sea there are pirates. Greek Proverb
Where there is a stink feces there is the odor of being.
Where there is great love there are always miracles. Willa Cather
Where there is love, there is pain. Spanish Proverb
Where there is much light, the shadow is deep. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Where there is much pretension, much has been borrowed; nature never pretends. Johann Kaspar Lavater
Where there is much to risk, there is much to consider. Platenus
Where there is no difference, there is only indifference. Louis Nizer
Where there is no religion, hypocrisy becomes good taste. George Bernard Shaw
Where there is no shame, there is no honour.
Where there is no vision a people perish. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Where there is sorrow, there is holy ground. Oscar Wilde
Where there is the necessary technical skill to move mountains, there is no need for the faith that moves mountains. Eric Hoffer
Where there's a whip there's a way.
Where there's a will, there are five hundred relatives.
Where there's a will, there's a lawsuit.
Where there's a will, there's a lawsuit. Addison Mizner
Where there's a will, there's a way Proverb
Where there's a will, there's a way. English Proverb
Where there's a will, there's an Inheritance Tax.
Where there's life there's hope.
Where there's marriage without love, there will be love without marriage. Benjamin Franklin
Where we cannot invent, we may at least improve. Charles Caleb Colton
Where we operate at a 90 angle to reality.
Where we operate at is a 90 angle to reality.
Where would we be without rhetorical questions? While money can't buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery. Anonymous
Where you stand depends on where you sit.
Where you've been means much less than where you're going.
Where's the beef?
Where's the ANY KEY ?
Where's there's smoke, there's toast.
Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart. Confucius
Wherever you go -- there you are.
Whether in chains or in laurels, liberty knows nothing but victories. Douglas MacArthur
Whether man is disposed to yield to nature or to oppose her, he cannot do without a correct understanding of her language. Jean Rostand
Whether women are better than men I cannot say - but I can say they are certainly no worse. Golda Meir
Whether you can hear it or not, The Universe is laughing behind your back.
Whether you think you can or think you can't - you are right. Henry Ford
Whether you think you can or whether you think you can't, you're right.
Which do I miss more Taglines or headaches???
Which is not a complete sentence, but merely a subordinate clause.
Which is the best government? That which teaches us to govern ourselves. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Which is the non-smoking lifeboat?
Which of my enemies told you I was paranoid?
Which way is up ? ARE YOU SURE ?
Which way to Castle Anthrax??...
While (!cat) play (mouse);
While I take inspiration from the past, like most Americans, I live for the future. Ronald Reagan-US president, 1992
While drunk, O'Brien builds a leprechaun transporter.
While grief is fresh, every attempt to divert only irritates. You must wait till it be digested, and then amusement will dissipate the remains of it. Samuel Johnson
While man's desires and aspirations stir he cannot choose but err. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
While most peoples' opinions change, the conviction of their correctness never does. Anonymous
While the mind is in doubt it is driven this way and that by a slight impulse. Terence
While theoretically and technically television may be feasible, commercially and financially I consider it an impossibility, a development of which we need waste little time or dreaming. Lee De Forest, 1926
While there's life, there's hope.
While there's life, there's hope. | Cicero (43 BC)
While traveling near Tampa, Florida I passed the 'Jehovah's Witness Assembly Hall' and was struck by the fact that that must be where they make them. Gene Spafford
Whip me, beat me, make me write bad software.
White dwarf seeks red giant for binary relationship.
Who are you?
Who asks whether the enemy were defeated by strategy or valor? Vergil
Who ate the last bowl of Corn Pops (TM) ?
Who bravely dares must sometimes risk a fall. Tobias G. Smollett
Who can say what's around the corner?
Who cares anyway?
Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past. George Orwell, author
Who dares nothing, need hope for nothing. Johann von Schiller
Who dares to teach must never cease to learn. John Cotton Dana
Who decides who is a "REAL" programmer ?
Who depends on another man's table often dines late. Italian Proverb
Who do you call to exorcise software ?
Who does not trust enough will not be trusted.
Who glued the cup to the table?
Who goes to psychiatrist should have his head examined
Who goeth a-borrowing goeth a-sorrowing.
Who invented SHORT people?
Who invited all these tacky people?
Who is General Failure and why is he reading my disk?
Who is John Galt?
Who is W. O. Baker, and why is he saying those terrible things about me?
Who is not satisfied with himself will grow; who is not sure of his own correctness will learn many things. Chinese Proverb
Who is wise? He that learns from everyone. Who is powerful? He that governs his passions. Who is rich? He who is content. Who is that? Nobody. Benjamin Franklin
Who kills a man kills a reasonae creature, God's image, but thee who destroys a goode booke, kills reason it selfe. John Milton
Who knows a fool, must know his brother; for one will recommend another. -- Poor Richard.
Who knows most says least.
Who needs Tag lines, Anyway???
Who needs a house out in Hackensack?
Who needs companionship when you can sit alone in your room and drink?
Who needs friends when you can sit alone in your room and drink?
Who reformatted the root disk?
Who remembers when we used to rest on Sunday instead of Monday? Kin Hubbard
Who says 1200 baud is slow???
Who the Dickens wrote "Oliver Twist", anyway?
Who to himself is law no law doth need, offends no law, and is a king indeed.
Who travels for love finds a thousand miles not longer than one. Japaneses Proverb
Who was Bruce Clarke?
Who was Dan Walsh?
Who was Dave Cardinal?
Who was Evan Adams?
Who was Frank Suchomel?
Who was Jim Voll?
Who was Karl Danz?
Who was Lorrie Duval?
Who was Mark Linton?
Who was Steve Saperstein?
Who was Tom Lyon?
Who will not suffer labor in this world, let him not be born. John Florio
Who with a little cannot be content, endures an everlasting punishment. Robert Herrick
Who's General Failure & why's he reading my disk?
Who's on first, what's on second, and I don't know's on third.| Bud Abbott
Who's scruffy looking?
Who, what, when and with who ?
Who, what, when and with whom ?
Whoever gossips to you will gossip about you. Spanish Proverb
Whoever has the most when he dies... WINS!
Whoever kindles the flames of intolerance in America is lighting a fire underneath his own home. Harold E. Stassen
Whoever lies with dogs rises with fleas.
Whoever profits by the crime is guilty of it. Anonymous
Whoever rows the boat doesn't have time to rock it.
Whom gods would destroy, they first teach MS-DOS.
Whom gods would destroy, they first teach UNIX.
Whom the gods destroy, they first teach Windows...
Whoops, I formatted the root disk.
Whoops, stepped on a frog.
Whoso diggeth a pit shall fall therein.
Whosoever diggeth a pit shall falleth therein.
Why Bother With Taglines?
Why C++ and not ++C ?
Why DID kamikaze pilots wear helmets anyways ?
Why Doesn't Ice Cream Have Any Bones???
Why ME ?
Why USA fails? Radio Shack=USA's Technology Store
Why are Chinese fortune cookies written in English?
Why are apartments so close together?
Why are elves chaotic? Brownian motion.
Why are people so unkind?| Kamahl
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
Why are there no black M&M's?
Why are there no blue M&M's?
Why are there no fuchisa M&M's?
Why are there no fuchsia M&M's?
Why are there no grey M&M's?
Why are there no lavender M&M's?
Why are there no mauve M&M's?
Why are there no pink M&M's?
Why are there no polka dot M&M's?
Why are there no purple M&M's?
Why are there no red M&M's?
Why are there no tan M&M's?
Why are there no white M&M's?
Why are there so many actors in this movie?
Why are there so many gnarly limbs on my family tree?
Why are today's rough times always tomorrow's good old days?
Why are we talking about this?  I don't have ques
Why are you looking down here? The joke is above!
Why are you wasting time reading taglines?
Why are you wasting your time reading taglines?
Why be a man when you can be a success?
Why be difficult when with a bit of effort you can be impossible?
Why bother phoning a psychic?  Let them phone you
Why bother phoning a psychic? Let them phone you!
Why buy shampoo when real poo is still free?
Why can I never find Troi when I'm mad at her?
Why can you only have two doors on a chicken coop? If it had four it would be a chicken sedan. Anonymous
Why can't we just spell it orderves?
Why can't women remember to put the toilet lid back up!?
Why did CNN cancel that cool "Desert Storm" show?
Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Why did the Albanion working class revolt?
Why did the Lord give us so much quickness of movement unless it was to avoid responsibility?
Why did the Roman Empire collapse?  What is the Latin for office automation?
Why do expenses always rise to meet income?
Why do my fusion pistols keep exploding!?
Why do pensioners have to eat catfood?
Why do people park in driveways and drive on parkways?
Why do programs get bigger when they're "faster than the older version?"
Why do the Kennedy men cry after sex?  MACE.
Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?
Why do they call them briefings when they take SO LONG?
Why do those that pay the least complain the most?
Why do we study poverty instead of wealth?
Why do you always find something in the last place you look?
Why do you have so much quickness of movement if not to avoid responsibility?
Why do you park in a driveway, and drive on a parkway???
Why do you read taglines?
Why do you think they call it "find"?
Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut save you thirty cents. Peg Bracken
Why does bread always fall butter side down?
Why does love got to be so sad?
Why does the other line always move faster?
Why don't chickens have lips?
Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional courtesy.
Why don't we do it in the road?
Why don't you come on over here, sit on my lap, and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?|Pick up line
Why don't you go play in the food processor?
Why don't you sue your brains for non-support ?
Why experiment on animals with so many lawyers out there?
Why get even, when you can get odd ?
Why glue my bills together? It's a mail bonding ritual.
Why go second class when 1st class is only $25?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?
Why is "easy listening" so hard to listen to?
Why is abbreviated such a long word ?
Why is everyone complaining about "youth in Asia?"
Why is it called "rush hour" if it's so damn slow?
Why is it drug addicts and computer affictionados are both called users? Clifford Stoll, unix sysop, hacker stalker, and author, 1995
Why is it that no matter where you are, you're "here" ?
Why is it that no one ever sent me yet One perfect limousine, do you suppose? Ah no, it's always just my luck to get One perfect rose. -Dorothy Parker, from One Perfect Rose
Why is it that old wives' tales often succeed where logic fails?
Why is it that the best taglines are too lon
Why is it that time softens some people and hardens others?
Why is it when we talk to God we're said to be praying, but when God talks to us we're scizophrenic? Lily Tomlin War is the unfolding of miscalculations. Barbara Tuchman
Why is it, whenever a group of internationalists get together, they always decide that Uncle Sam must be the goat? Bertrand H. Snell
Why is that light %^&&&
Why is the sun never overhead at noon?
Why is there a watermelon on the bandsaw?
Why is there only one "Monopolies Commission?"
Why isn't there another word for thesaurus?
Why not YOU ?
Why not go out on a limb?  Isn't that where the fruit is?
Why not go out on a limb? Isn't that where the fruit is?. Frank Scully
Why read it when you can print it ?
Why then do the Wicked Prosper?
Why was Worf stuck to the ceiling?  Static Klingon!
Why yes, they are Bugle Boy beans.
Why, they couldn't hit an lephant at this dist... Gen. John Sedgewick, last words
Wibble.
Wicked men obey from fear; good men, from love. Aristotle
Wickedness is a myth invented by good people to account for the curious attraction of others. Gideon Wurdz
Wickedness is its own greatest punishment.
Wild oats make a bad autumn crop. Cynic's Calendar
Wilimanakabeetsai!
Will Windows 3.1 be any good ?
Will Windows 3.1 come with a Hard Drive?
Will compute for food.
Will had a fortune the other day, but he forgot it.
Will is character in action. William McDougall
Will you come quietly, or shall I use ear plugs?
Willful waste brings woeful want. Thomas Fuller
William Jennings Bryan Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without. Buddha
William K. Smith:"Wait, my uncle Ted can drive you home."
Wilt thou seal up the avenues of ill? Pay every debt as if God wrote the bill. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Win Some Lose Some....But When Do I Win Some?
Win any way as long as you can get away with it. Nice guys finish last. Leo Durocher
Win at first and lose at last.
Win if you can, lose if you must, but always cheat
Win without boasting and lose without excuse.
Window garden harrow (pulled behind Tonka tractors) | From "101 USES FOR A DEAD MICROPROCESSOR"
Window-screen: An arrangement for keeping flies in.
Windows 3.0 : Ooey, GUI, Good!
Windows 3.0 : from the people who brought you EDLIN.
Windows 3.0 is for wannabe computer gurus.
Windows 3.0  No Pane  No Gain.
Windows 3.0: Attractive & Easy, Slut of the CPU.
Windows 3.0: from the people that brought you EDLIN
Windows 3.1 coming to the rescue Wait for FedEx
Windows 3.1: from the people that brought you EDLIN
Windows 3.1: the best $99 solitare game I've ever seen
Windows 3.x : from the people who brought you EDLIN.
Windows 3.x : from the people who brought you the 640K limit !
Windows 3.x : just say NO !!!
Windows 3.x is NOT a virus... Viruses DO something !
Windows 3.x is for wannabe computer gurus.
Windows 95 on a 486 is a REAL experience !
Windows : From the people who brought you the 640K limit.
Windows : a good one is a dead one. General Cluster
Windows Error 0x001:  Error 0x002 occured.
Windows IS NOT a virus. Viruses do something.
Windows Ice Cream: Hoggin DOS
Windows doesn't kill you, it's the glass when it crashes.
Windows is a kolossal kludge.
Windows is to OS/2 as Etch-A-Scetch is to Art.
Windows isn't a virus -- viruses do something
Windows may be slow, but at least it takes up a lot of
Windows may be slow, but at least it takes up a lot of ro
Windows practical joke: Write a program that works.
Windows speed tip: type DEL \WINDOWS\*.*
Windows to 486/50 mhz cpu: Don't rush me, don't rush me...
Windows, the EDSEL of operating systems!
Windows:  an 80486 to XT Conversion Kit.
Windows: 80486 to 8088 conversion made painful...
Windows: A cute clown suit for DOS.
Windows: A demo program that comes with the mouse you bought.
Windows: Brought to you by the makers of Edlin!
Windows: From the people who brought you EDLIN!
Windows: From the people who brought you the 640K limit
Windows: Just another pane in the glass.
Windows: Run....Walk......Crawl....Stop.
Windows: The best $89 solitare game you can buy.
Windows: big, expensive, pretty virus.
Windows: so intuitive it only needs one meg of help files.
Windows? HA! C:\WINDOWS. DELETE *.* AH! Thats Better <g>
Wink, I'll do the rest.|Bumper sticker
Winners never quit and quitters never win.
Winning is a habit. Unfortuantely, so is losing. Vince Lombardi
Winning is not a sometime thing; it's an all-the-time thing. Vince Lombardi
Winning isn't everything, but then losing is nothing.
Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing. Red Sanders
Winning may not be everything, but losing has little to recommend it. Dianne Feinstein
Winny and I lived in a house that ran on static electricity. If you wanted to run the blender, you had to rub balloons on your head. If you wanted to cook, you had to pull off a sweater real quick... Stephen Wright
Winny would spend all of his time practicing limbo. He got pretty good. He could go under a rug. Stephen Wright
Winston Peters, a rebel without a caucus.
Winter is nature's way of saying "up yours".
Wisdom and good sense guard life from harm.
Wisdom consists of knowing when to avoid perfection.
Wisdom has never made a bigot, but learning has. Josh Billings
Wisdom is knowing what to do next.
Wisdom is knowing what to do with what you know.
Wisdom is knowledge which has become a part of one's being. Orison S. Marden
Wisdom is ofttimes nearer when we stoop than when we soar. William Wordsworth
Wisdom is the sunlight of the soul.
Wisdom is the supreme part of happiness. Sophocles
Wisdom outweighs any wealth. | Sophocles (406 BC)
Wisdom too often never comes, and so one ought not to reject it merely because it comes late. Felix Frankfurter
Wise man see more from bottom of well than fool from mountain top.
Wise man see more from mountain top than fool from bottom of well.
Wise men change their minds, fools never.
Wise men don't need advice. Fools won't take it. Benjamin Franklin
Wise men never play leapfrog with unicorns.
Wise men never sit and wail their loss, but cheerily seek how to redress their harms. William Shakespeare
Wise people are full of doubts (I think).
Wise words in the mouths of fools oft belie.
Wish I had some idea of what I'm asking.  :-!
Wishes won't wash dishes.
Wishing without work is like fishing without bait.
Wit and wisdom are rarely seen together.
Wit has truth in it.  Wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words.
Wit is cultured insolence.
Wit is educated insolence.
Wit is the salt of conversation, not the food. William Hazlitt
Wit is the spice of conversation, not the food.
Wit makes its own welcome, and levels all distinctions. No dignity, no learning, no force of character, can make any stand against good wit. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Wit ought to be a glorious treat like caviar; never spread it about like marmalade. Noel Coward
Witches use brooms because nature abhors a vacuum.
With a calendar, your days are numbered !
With a gentleman I am always a gentleman and a half, and with a fraud I try to be a fraud and a half. Otto von Bismarck
With a mind like yours, who needs a body.
With a rubber duck, one's never alone. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
With all due respect, I'd like to go for a swim. | Riker
With clothes the new are best, with friends the old are best.
With consequences,  the unexpected always predominate.
With effervescing opinions, the quickest way to let them get flat is to let them get exposed to the air. Oliver Wendell Holmes
With every wish there comes a curse.
With foxes we must play the fox.
With free advice, you get what you paid for.
With friends like these, who needs to hallucinate?
With friends like you, who needs enemas.
With increased opportunity comes increased stress. The stress comes from multiple conflicting demands and very little in the way of role models. Madeline Hemmings
With me a change of trouble is as good as a vacation. William Lloyd George
With me poetry has not been a purpose, but a passion. Edgar Allan Poe
With my Stealth Modem, you'll never see me coming
With our judgements as our watches, none go just alike.
With people of only moderate ability modesty is mere honesty; but with those who possess great talent it is hypocrisy. Arthur Schopenhauer
With sixty staring me in the face, I have developed inflammation of the sentence structure and definite hardening of the paragraphs. James Thurber
With the possible wrongness of science firmly in mind, the student of science today is protected against disaster. When an individual theory collapses, it need not carry with it one's faith and hope and innocent joy. Once we learn to expect theories Isaac Asimov
Without Time, everything would happen at once.
Without a rich heart wealth is an ugly beggar. Ralph Waldo Emerson
Without adventure civilization is in full decay. Alfred North Whitehead
Without death and decay, how could life go on? John Burroughs
Without economy none can be rich, and with it few will be poor. Samuel Johnson
Without fingers you cannot even thumb your nose.
Without fools there would be no wisdom.
Without health you cannot enjoy wealth or happiness.
Without humility there can be no humanity. John Buchan
Without knowing the force of words, it is impossible to know men. Confucius
Without love and trust all you can be in life is alone.
Without moral and intellectual independence, there is no anchor for national independence. David Ben-Gurion
Without music, life would be a mistake.
Without my ignorance, your knowledge would be meaningless
Without publicity there can be no public support, and without public support every nation must decay. Benjamin Disraeli
Without tact you can learn nothing. Benjamin Disraeli
Without tools there would be no wisdom.
Without waves there would be no change
Wives are young men's mistresses, companions for middle age, and old men's nurses. Francis Bacon
Woe to the man whose heart has not learned while young to hope, to loveand to put its trust in life. Joseph Conrad
Woman wants monogamy; Man delights in novelty Love is woman's moon and sun; Man has other forms of fun... With this the gist and sum of it, What earthly good can come of it? -Dorothy Parker, from a General Review of the Sex Situation
Woman was God's second mistake.
Woman was God's second mistake. -- Nietzsche.
Woman's honor is nice as ermine; it will not bear a soil. John Dryden
Woman.zip - great program, readme.1st file is missing.
Woman.zip : great program, but readme.1st file is missing.
Women ! Can't live with them, can't live without them !
Women - can't live with 'em and no resale value...
Women and elephants never forget real or supposed injury.
Women and foxes, being weak, are distinguished by superior tact. Ambrose Bierce
Women are never disarmed by compliments. Men always are. That is the difference between the sexes. Oscar Wilde
Women are not forgiven for ageing. Robert Redford's lines of distinction are my old-age wrinkles. Jane Fonda
Women do come with instructions, ask them !
Women do come with instructions, just ask them!
Women do come with instructions; ask them.
Women dress alike all over the world: they dress to be annoying to other women. Elsa Schiaparelli
Women get minks the same way minks get minks.
Women have got to make the world safe for men since men have made it so darned unsafe for women. Lady Nancy Astor
Women take to good hearted men. Also from.
Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.|Bumper sticker
Women! Can't live with 'em and no resale value.
Women! Cant live with them, Cant live with them!
Women's clothes: Go to extremes, seldom to extremities.
Women's libbers are ok, I just wouldn't want my sister to marry one.
Women, can't live with'um, can't shoot'um.
Women, wind and fortune soon change.
Women: You can't live with them, pass the beer nuts- Norm
Wonder is the basis of worship. Thomas Carlyle
Wonderful music. My compliments to the clef.
Wonders will never cease to amaze me!
Woody Allen I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick, not wounded, dead.
Woody Allen Jack Benny played Mendelsson last night. Mendelsson lost. Anonymous
Word Perfect Makes Perfect Sense
Word Words are the coins making up the currency of sentences, and there are always too many small coins. Jules Renard
Word is a shadow of deed. | Democritus (400 BC)
WordPerfect and MegaMail, what a pair!!
WordPerfect isn't, Pagemaker doesn't, etc., etc., etc.
WordStar and SLMR, a GREAT combination!
Words : 25 each. Better quality words : 50 each.
Words and ideas are what change our world.
Words are not food, though sometimes we must eat them.
Words are the voice of the heart.
Words are tools which automatically carve concepts out of experience. Julian Sorrell Huxley
Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind. Rudyard Kipling
Words have a longer life than deeds.
Words must be weighed, not counted.
Words must be weighed, not counted. Polish Proverb
Words without actions are the assassins of idealism. Herbert Hoover
Words, 25 ea. Better quality words, 50 ea.
Words, words, words.  And no place to put them all!
Worf becomes angry at the thought of brushing his teeth.
Worf becomes anrgy at the thought of brushing his teeth.
Worf hides for days knowing his bumps have gone flat.
Worf: "Shields failing" Picard: "Give 'em more homework"
Work 8 hours, sleep 8 hours; but not the same 8 hours. Anonymous
Work The day is short, the labor long, the workers are idle, and reward is great, and the Master is urgent. Aboth, 2:15
Work and play are words used to describe the same thing under differing conditions. Mark Twain
Work expands to fill the time available for its completion.
Work fascinates me. I could just sit and watch it for hours.
Work is either fun or drudgery. It depends on your attitude. I like fun. Colleen C. Barrett
Work is for people who can't
Work is love made visible. Kahlil Gibran
Work is the curse of the drinking class.
Work is the curse of the drinking man.
Work is the greatest thing in the world, so we should always save some of it for tomorrow. Don Herold
Work is the meat of life, pleasure the dessert. Bertie Charles Forbes
Work is the price you pay for money.
Work off excess energy.  Steal something heavy.
Work off excess energy. Steal something heavy
Work out your salvation with diligence. | Buddha - last words
Work: a necessary evil for money to buy computer stuff.
Workshops are the bane of civilization.
World ends today at 9:30pm!  Film at 11:00...
World's greatest Gif collector.
World-wide practice of Conservation and the fair and continued access by all nations to the resources they need are the two indispensable foundations of continuous plenty and of permanent peace. Gifford Pinchot
Worry : The interest paid on trouble before it's due
Worry a little bit every day and in a lifetime you will lose a couple of years. If something is wrong, fix it if you can. But train yourself not to worry. Worry never fixes anything. Mary Hemingway
Worry gives a small thing a big shadow. Swedish Proverb
Worry is interest paid on trouble before it is due. William Ralph Inge
Worry is the interest paid by those who borrow trouble. George Lyon
Worry is the interest paid on trouble in advance.
Worst-case scenario : you may have to BUY it.
Worst-case scenario. U may have to BUY it.
Worst-case scenario. You may have to BUY it.
Worst-dressed sentient being in the known universe
Worth begets in base minds, envy; in great souls, emulation. Henry Fielding
Worth seeing?  Yes, but not worth going to see.
Worth seeing? Yes, but not worth going to see.
Would George be president if his name was Harry?
Would I ask you a rhetorical question?
Would a virgin be called a notyeterosexual?
Would it help if I got out and pushed?
Would it save some time if I gave up and went mad now?
Would like to go where no one has gone before
Would the Standing Committee sit down?
Would ye both eat your cake and have your cake?
Would you believe... this is a tagline?
Would you give your right arm to be ambidextrous?
Would you let a bug escape because it did not bite you?
Would you like some duck for lunch, eh misster, would you?
Would you like to have morning coffee with me?|Pick up line
Would you trust a POLITICIAN to run the country?
Wounded Knee: 100 years December 29, 1990.
Wow  I could've had a V/8
Wow They've put my favourite food on the menu again
Wow!  I could've had a V/8!
Wow!  What a groove!  It's a tropical paradise!
Wowie, I'm having a really great time
Wrinkles are sure signs of where smiles have been.
Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been. Mark Twain
Write all adverbial forms correct.
Write all complaints legibly --> []
Write complaints legibly here : []
Write down the advice of him who loves you, though you like it not at present. Proverb
Write on my gravestone: 'Infidel, Traitor.'infidel to every church that compromises with wrong; traitor to every government that oppresses the people. Wendell Phillips
Writers seldom choose as friends those self-contained characters who are never in trouble, never unhappy or ill, never make mistakes, and always count their change when it is handed to them. Catherine Drinker Bowen
Writers seldom write the things they think. They simply write the things they think other folks think they think. Elbert Hubbard
Writing a book is like washing an elephant: there's no good place to begin or end, and it's hard to keep track of what you've already covered. Anonymous
Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.
Writing free verse is like playing tennis with the net down.
Writing free verse is like playing tennis with the net down. Robert Frost
Writing is the only profession where no one considers you ridiculous if you earn no money. Jules Renard
Wrong is but falsehood put in practice. Walter S. Landor
W׳ א W(D і$, ׂ $W$ ³G.
XAV eht edisni deppart ma I pleH
XEROX never comes up with something original.
XT at 8 Mhz. = 386 at 25 Mhz. + Windose
XT/8 Mhz = 386/25 Mhz + Windose
Xerox never comes up with anything original.
YOU look like an elephant!
YOUNG'S COROLLARY: The greater the funding, the longer it takes to make the mistake.
YOUNG'S LAW: all great discoveries are made by mistake.
YOUNG'S PRINCIPLE OF INDIVIDUALITY: Everybody wants to peel their own banana.
YOYO MODE n. State in which a computer (relatively) rapidly changes states between 'UP' and 'DOWN'.
Ya' know, that outfit would look great on my bedroom floor.....|Pick up line
Yawn a more Roman way.
Yawn: The only time some men get to open their mouths.
Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you mad. Aldous Huxley
Yeah, but what's the speed of DARK?
Yeah?  Well, tell that to her parents. | Geordi
Years ago fairy tales all began with 'Once upon a time...', now we know they all begin with, 'If I am elected...' Carolyn Warner
Yeast is yeast and nest is nest and never the mane shall tweet.
Yep! you bet... What was that you said?
Yer such a wild thang!
Yes Virginia, there is a Dan Parsons.
Yes dear, one more star WILL fit on that collar.
Yes my son, long ago mail was read 1 packet at a time.
Yes, I admit, *I* steal taglines??
Yes, I know I'm off-topic.  Thank you for your concern.
Yes, and by the same token, no.
Yes, but are you SURE ?
Yes-men: Fellows who hang around the man nobody knows.
Yesterday I couldn't spell "computer programmer".  Now I are one.
Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone...when I came back the entire area was missing. Stephen Wright
Yesterday is a cancelled cheque; Tomorrow is a promissory note; today is the only cash you have - so spend it wisely.| Kay Lyons
Yesterday is a memory.	Tomorrow is a vision.  Today is a bitch.
Yesterday is a memory. Tomorrow is a vision.  Today is a bitch.
Yesterday is but today's memory, and tomorrow is today's dream. Kahlil Gibran
Yesterday is but today's memory, and tomorrow is today's dream., Kahlil Gibran
Yesterday was the deadline on all complaints.
Yet another hurdle cleared successfully.
Yet we can maintain a free society only if we recognize that in a free society no one can win all the time. No one can have his own way all the time, and no one is right all the time. Richard M. Nixon
Yield to temptation, it may not pass your way again.
Yield to temptation..it may be your only chance!
Yield to temptation; It may not pass your way again.
Yoda of Borg am I.  Assimilated will you be - Yes?
Yogi Bare was a Buddhist Nudist.
Yoooouuuuu'rreee Irrelevant | Daffy Duck of Borg
You *must* be kidding
You Cannot Escape  Resistance Is Futile
You Klingon sons, you've killed my bastard... no, wait..
You ain't learning nothing when you're talking.
You ain't seen nuttin' yet!
You always find something in the last place you look, unless it's not there.
You always find something in the last place you look.
You and all your silly English Knnnnnnnn-ighuts!!!
You are HERE   ----> ! <-----
You are a bundle of energy always on the go.
You are a general favorite among your many friends.
You are a person of firm, yet honest intentions.
You are a singer who has to take any note above A with your eyebrows.
You are a very redundant person; that's what kind of person you are, redundant.
You are about to make a most valuable discovery.
You are always busy.
You are an individual interested in foreward thrust and the future.
You are an insult to my intelligence  I demand that you log off immediately.
You are an insult to my intelligence!  I demand that you log off immediately.
You are being paged.
You are being swapped.
You are being watched.	Cut out the hanky-panky for a few days.
You are being watched. Cut out the hanky-panky for a few days.
You are broad minded and socially active.
You are capable of planning your future.
You are careful and systematic in your business arrangements.
You are clever, alert, and intellectual.
You are confident of things you know nothing about.
You are confused; but this is your normal state.
You are deeply attached to your friends and acquaintances.
You are dishonest, but never to the point of hurting a friend.
You are fair-minded, just and loving.
You are fairminded, just and loving.
You are faithful to duty, adaptable to environment, loyal to friends.
You are farsighted, a good planner, an ardent lover, and a faithful friend.
You are fast approaching your level of incompetence.
You are fixed in your opinions and will not be easily moved from your purpose.
You are generous and always think of the other fellow.
You are going to have a new love affair.
You are growing sleepy, very sleepy.  At midnite tonite, you will write a blank check in the amount of the balance of your check book and mail it to me at...
You are heading for a land of sunshine.
You are in a maze of little twisting passages, all different.
You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
You are in a maze of twisty little programs, all alike.
You are in a maze of twisty passages...
You are in a twisting maze of little passages, all different.
You are interested in higher education whether material or spiritual.
You are lustworthy.
You are magnetic in your bearing.
You are making progress if each mistake is a new one.
You are never fully dressed until you wear a smile.
You are never selfish with your advice or your help.
You are next in line for promotion in your firm.
You are not my father | Luke Skywalker
You are only what you are when no one is looking. Robert C. Edwards
You are only young once, but you can be immature forever.
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.
You are scrupulously honest, frank, and straightforward.
You are secretive in your dealings but never to the extent of trickery.
You are smart.  Can you make us go?
You are so narrowminded you can see through a keyhole with two eyes.
You are standing on my toes.
You are sunlight and I, moon  Joined by the gods of fortune Midnight and high noon  Sharing the sky We have been blessed, you and I | MISS SAIGON
You are taking advantage of the good nature of a friend.  Be careful.
You are taking yourself too seriously.
You are talking to a Program that passed the Turing test!
You are the center of every group's attention.
You are the only human being on Earth; everyone else is a robot.
You are the winner of one of these prizes...
You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you. James Allen
You are too narrowminded if you can see through a keyhole with both eyes.
You are tricky, but never to the point of dishonesty.
You are truly a rhinestone in the rough.
You are ugly and your mother dresses you funny.
You are unscrupulously dishonest, false, and deceitful.
You are versatile, energetic, artistic and good-natured.
You are wise, witty, and wonderful, but you spend too much time reading this sort of trash.
You are witty and fond of fun.
You aren't here forever, Enjoy each day as a miracle.
You argue with yourself and LOSE??? -- Problem!!
You attempt things that you do not even plan because of your extreme stupidity.
You auto buy now.
You become a good writer just as you become a good joiner: by planing down your sentences. Anatole France
You believe easily that which you hope for earnestly. Terence
You buttered your bread, now lie in it.
You can accomplish much if you don't care who gets the credit. Ronald Reagan
You can always find what you are not looking for.
You can be honest or wealthy,....not honest _and_ wealthy!
You can be replaced by a machine that flushes.
You can be replaced by this computer.
You can believe in God without believing in immortality, but it is hard to see how anyone can believe in immortality and not believe in God. Ernest Dimnet
You can best reward a liar by believing nothing of what he says. Aristippus
You can cage a swallow, can't you, but you can't swallow a cage, can you?
You can change your faith without changing gods, and vice versa. Stanislaw J. Lec
You can close your eyes to reality but not to memories.
You can depend on nothing, you see?
You can do very well in speculation where land or anything to do with earth is concerned.
You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you Can't Fool Mom. Captain Penny's Law
You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time,. And that's sufficient. Rose King
You can fool some of the people all the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you cannot fool all of the people all the time. Abraham Lincoln
You can fool too many of the people too much of the time. James Thurber
You can get a lot more done with a kind word and a gun, than with a kind word alone. Al Capone
You can get more things done with a kind word and a gun than with a kind word alone. -- Al Capone.
You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word.
You can lead a boy to college but you can't make him think. Elbert Hubbard
You can lead a boy to college, but you cannot make him think. Elbert Hubbard
You can lead a horse to water, and if he walks on it patent him.
You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. Proverb
You can lead a horticulture, but you cannot make her think.
You can lead a man to ponder; you cannot make him think
You can make more friends in two months by becoming interrested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interrested in you. Dale Carnegie
You can milk a cow the wrong way once and still be a farmer, but vote the wrong way on a water tower and you can be in trouble. John Fitzgerald Kennedy
You can muffle the drum, and you can loosen the strings of the lyre, but who shall command the skylark not to sing? Kahlil Gibran
You can name your salary here. I call mine Fred.
You can never discard too many bad ideas.
You can never get rid of a bad temper by losing it.
You can never have a revolution in order to establish a democracy. You must have a democracy in order to have a revolution. Gilbert K. Chesterton
You can never tell which way the train went by looking at the track.
You can never tell which way the train went by looking at the tracks.
You can never trust a woman; she may be true to you.
You can no more win a war than you can win an earthquake., Jeannette Rankin
You can observe a lot by just watching.
You can observe a lot just by watching.
You can only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. Anonymous
You can pick out actors by the glazed look that comes into their eyes when the conversation wanders away from themselves. Michael Wilding
You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose
You can preach a better sermon with your life than with your lips.
You can say you're (excrement) out of luck
You can stand tall without standing on someone. You can be a victor without having victems. Harriet Woods
You can tell how far we have to go, when FORTRAN is still the language of supercomputers.
You can tell it's really cold when the consultants have their hands in their own pockets.
You can tell when politicians are lying...They move their lips.
You can tune a guitar, but you cant tuna fish.
You can't always get what you want.| Mick Jagger
You can't antagonize and influence at the same time.
You can't be brave if you've only had wonderful things happen to you. Mary Tyler Moore
You can't be optimistic with a misty optic.| Peter Campbell
You can't believe everything you hear, but you can repeat it.
You can't believe everything your hear.
You can't change the laws of physics, Captain; I've got to have thirty minutes.
You can't cheat the phone company.
You can't cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water. Don't let yourself indulge in vain wishes. Rabindranath Tagore
You can't do that. It's been digitally cursed.
You can't eat your friends and have them too.
You can't even cut the cheese.
You can't fall off the floor.
You can't find any true closeness in Hollywood., because everybody does the fake closeness so well. Carrie Fisher
You can't fool me--there ain't no sanity clause.
You can't get spoiled if you do your own ironing. Meryl Streep
You can't get there from here.
You can't get to Heaven on roller skates.
You can't go home again, unless you set $HOME.
You can't have a better tomorrow if you are thinking about yesterday all the time. Charles F. Kettering
You can't have everything. Where would you put it? Stephen Wright
You can't have everything... where would you put it?
You can't hold a man down without staying down with him. Booker T. Washington
You can't kiss a girl unexpectedly--only sooner than she thought you would.
You can't legislate intelligence and common sense into people. Will Rogers
You can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear.
You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is satire. All you're doing is recording it. Art Buchwald
You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into. Anon.
You can't rollerskate in a buffalo herd...
You can't step twice in the same river.
You can't teach an old dog new tricks Proverb
You can't teach people to be lazy - either they have it or they don't.
You can't tell a book by its movie.
You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep. Navajo Proverb
You can't win them all, but you can sure lose them all.
You can't win, you can't break even, and you can't get out of the game.
You can't win. You can't break even. You can't even quit the game.
You cannot achieve the impossible without attempting the absurd.
You cannot acquire experience by making experiments. You cannot create experience. You must undergo it. Albert Camus
You cannot antagonize and influence at the same time.
You cannot be a leader, and ask other people to follow you, unless you know how to follow, too. Sam Rayburn
You cannot be too careful in the choice of your enemies.
You cannot build a reputation on what you are going to do. Henry Ford
You cannot describe it or draw it. You cannot praise it enough or perceive it. No place can be found in which to put the Original Face; it will not disappear even when the universe is destroyed. Mumon
You cannot determine beforehand which side of the bread to butter.
You cannot do a kindness too soon, for you never know how soon it will be too late. Ralph Waldo Emerson
You cannot judge a horse by it's harness.
You cannot kill time without assaulting eternity.
You cannot kill time without injuring eternity.
You cannot make your opportunities concur with the opportunities of people whose incomes are ten times greater than yours. Edward S. Martin
You cannot propel yourself forward by patting yourself on the back.
You cannot propel yourself forward by patting yourself on the back. Anonymous
You cannot propel youself forward by patting yourself on the back.
You cannot run away from a weakness; you must sometimes fight it out or perish. And if that be so, why not now, and where you stand? Robert Louis Stevenson
You cannot see farther than others by standing on the feet of giants.
You cannot see the wood for the trees.
You cannot see the wood for the trees. | John Heywood
You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist. Golda Meir
You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist. Indira Gandhi
You cannot succeed by criticizing others.
You cannot successfully determine beforehand which side of the bread to butter. Perversity of Nature Law
You cannot teach a crab to walk straight. | Aristophanes
You cannot teach a man anything.; you can only help him to find it for himself. Galileo Galilei
You cannot teach a man anything; you can only help him find it within himself. Galileo
You cannot tell how deep a puddle is until you step in it.
You cannot use your friends and have them too.
You could compile the worst book in the world entirely out of selected passages from the best writers in the world. Gilbert K. Chesterton
You could have knocked me over with a fender.
You dialed 5483.
You didn't tell me what I was getting into. Dick Clark, ageless music promoter, during an appearance on 'Politically Incorrect', 1995
You display the wonderful traits of charm and courtesy.
You do ill if you praise, but worse if you censure, what you do not understand. Leonardo da Vinci, Italian inventor
You do not have mail.
You do not need a needle for ruptured pigs.
You do well in speculation where land or anything to do with earth is involved.
You do what you do because you want to.  I do what I do 'cause "Bob" told me to.
You don't buy beer, you just rent it...
You don't deserve it, but I'm glad it happened !
You don't give a damn about apathy.
You don't have to be a cannibal to get fed up with people.
You don't have to have fought in a war to love peace. Geraldine Ferraro
You don't have to stay up nights to succeed; you have to stay awake days. Anonymous If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business. Joey Adams
You don't have to suffer to be a poet; adolescence is enough suffering for anyone. John Ciardi
You don't know it, but this is a subliminal tagline...
You don't know what you want, and are willing to go through hell to get it.
You don't move to Edina, you achieve Edina.
You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows.
You don't need any brains to listen to music. Luciano Pavarotti, opera singer, 1994
You don't tell deliberate lies, but sometimes you have to be evasive. Margaret Thatcher
You don't tell deliberate lies, but sometimes you have to be evasive. Margaret Thatcher, english prime minister
You don't usually see that kind of behavior in a major appliance.
You dream of things that aren't and ask "why not?".
You enjoy the company of other people.
You feel a whole lot more like you do now than you did when you used to.
You fill a much-needed gap.
You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do. Eleanor Roosevelt
You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do., Eleanor Roosevelt
You get the best out of others when you give the best of yourself. Harvey Firestone
You get the most of what you need the least.
You get what you pay for.
You get what you pay for. Proverb
You go Uruguay, I'll go mine.
You gotta know when to code 'em, know when to modem.
You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em.
You grow up the day you have your first real laugh, at yourself. Ethel Barrymore
You hate mail.
You have 2 choices for dinner--take it or leave it.
You have a deep appreciation of the arts and music.
You have a deep interest in all that is artistic.
You have a frog in your pocket?
You have a massage.  (From the Swedish prime minister.)
You have a reputation for being thoroughly reliable and trustworthy.
You have a right to your opinions. I just don't want to hear them.
You have a strong appeal for members of the opposite sex.
You have a strong appeal for members of your own sex.
You have a strong desire for a home and your family interests come first.
You have a tendency to feel you are superior to most computers.
You have a truly strong individuality.
You have a will that can be influenced by all with whom you come in contact.
You have a yearning for perfection.
You have an ability to sense and know higher truth.
You have an ambitious nature and may make a name for yourself.
You have an important role as a negative example.
You have an unusual equipment for success.  Be sure to use it properly.
You have an unusual magnetic personality.
You have an unusual understanding of the problems of human relationship.
You have been selected for a secret mission.
You have been targeted for termination.
You have fallen so far behind, there is no reason to log in.
You have had a long-term stimulation relative to business.
You have hate mail.
You have junk mail.
You have literary talent that you should take pains to develop.
You have lived if you have loved.
You have mail.
You have many friends and very few enemies.
You have many friends and very few living enemies.
You have moments. You do have moments.
You have no real enemies.
You have only a very small head and must live within it.
You have the God-given right to kick the government arounddon't hesitate to do so. Edmund Muske
You have the ass of a great artist.|Pick up line
You have the attitude of a winner.
You have the bridge, Number One--I have to go number two!
You have the capacity to learn from mistakes.  You will learn a lot today.
You have the capacity to learn from mistakes.  You'll learn a lot today.
You have the power to influence all with whom you come in contact.
You have to be cheerful sometimes, you know.
You have to break a few eggs to make an omlette. Proverb
You have to go out there and give it 110% in the ninetieth minute.
You have to take the good with the bad. Proverb
You have violated Robot's Rules of Order.
You have your problems, and I have yours.
You haven't a single redeeming vice.
You hit the nail right between the eyes.
You humans are all alike.
You in the red uniform, see what that noise is."-- Kirk
You knew the job was dangerous when you took it, Fred...
You know how it is when you're reading a book and falling asleep, you're reading, reading... and all of a sudden you notice your eyes are closed? I'm like that all the time. Stephen Wright
You know how it is when you're walking up the stairs, and you get to the top, and you think there's one more step? I'm like that all the time. Stephen Wright
You know how to win a victory, Hannibal, but not how to use it.
You know how to win a victory, but not how to use it.
You know the price of everything and the value of nothing.
You know what ? I'm NOT happy...
You know what's going on, don't you? * Ace
You know you're dieting when postage stamps taste good.
You know you're getting old when everything dries up or leaks.
You know you're getting old when everything hurts. And what doesn't hurt doesn't work. Hy Gardner
You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. Bob Hope
You learn as much by writing as you do by reading.
You like participating in competitive sports.
You like to form new friendships and make new acquaintances.
You look marvelous.
You look tired
You love peace.
You love your home and want it to be beautiful.
You made my day, now you have to sleep in it.
You make ends meet...and they hate each other!
You may already be a wiener
You may already be a wiener!
You may attend a party where strange customs prevail.
You may be Southern -- but you're no Comfort.
You may be a lover but you aint no dancer
You may be a lover but you aint no dancer!
You may be conservative, cautious and practical.
You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough. Frank Crane
You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try. Beverly Sills
You may be recognized soon.  Perhaps you should hide?
You may easily play a joke on a man who likes to argueagree with him. Ed Howe
You may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile.
You may give a man an office, but you cannot give him discretion. -- Poor Richard.
You may have mail.
You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it. Margaret Thatcher
You may laugh at a friend's roof; don't laugh at his sleeping accomodation. Kenyan Proverb
You may now log in to life.  Password:
You may park anywhere if you turn your four-way flashers on.| Rules for driving in New York
You may shut your doors against a thief but not against a liar.
You may turn into an archangel, a fool, or a criminalno one will see it. But when a button is missingeveryone sees that. Ech M. Remarque
You mean I can put stuff past column 72? WOW UNIX is great
You mean I can put stuff past column 72? WOW! UNIX is great!
You mean, we have ANOTHER modem to feed ?
You mean, we have ANOTHER modem to feed?
You might as well -- I stole yours.
You might as well fall flat on your face as lean too far backward.
You might as well. I stole yours.
You might have mail.
You moon the wrong person at an office party and suddenly you're not 'professional' any more. Jeff Foxworthy, commedian, 1995
You must be patient for a little while.
You must be saved -- even if it Kills you.
You must believe in God, in spite of what the clergy say. Benjamin Jowett
You must grow like a tree, not like a mushroom. Janet Erskine Stuart
You must know much before you know how little you know.
You must learn day by day, year by year, to broaden your horizon. The more things you love, the more you are interested in, the more you enjoy, the more you are indignant about, the more you have left when anything happens. Ethel Barrymore
You must look into people, as well as at them. Lord Chesterfield
You must lose a fly to catch a trout. George Herbert
You need not worry about your future.
You need the MANUALS to use this tagline!
You need to acquire a little subtlety.
You need to relax, Dax. Take a chill pill, Trill!
You needn't love your enemy, but if you refrain from telling lies about him, you are doing well enough. Ed Howe
You never "find" time, but you can always "make" it.
You never find an article until you replace it.
You never have mail.
You never hesitate to tackle the most difficult problems.
You never realize how short a month is until you pay alimony. John Barrymore
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
You now have Asian Flu.
You only have a problem if you think it is a problem.
You own a dog, but you can only feed a cat.
You pathetic, puny, puking, putrid puddle of poodle piss
You plan things that you do not even attempt because of your extreme caution.
You prefer the company of the opposite sex, but are well liked by your own.
You realize how short a month when you pay alimony.
You recoil from the crude; you tend naturally toward the exquisite.
You roll my log, and I will roll yours.
You said a mouseful!
You say that now, but try chewing a child the next time you're car sick.
You say things with your eyes that others waste time putting into words.
You scratch my tape, and I'll scratch yours.
You see much more of your children once they leave home. Lucille Ball
You see things and you say 'Why?'; but I dream things that never were and I say 'Why not?' George Bernard Shaw
You see things; and you say, "Why?" But I dream things that never were; and I say, "Why not?"| George Bernard Shaw
You see, dear, it is not true that woman was made from man's rib; she was really made from his funny bone. James Matthew Barrie
You seek to shield those you love and you like the role of the provider.
You shall be rewarded for a dastardly deed.
You shall judge of a man by his foes as well as by his friends. Joseph Conrad
You should avoid hedging, at least that's what I think.
You should go home.
You should hammer your iron when it is glowing hot. Publius Syrus
You should hardly ever equivocate.
You should presently be able to deal from a full deck.
You should use contraceptives at every conceivable occasion.
You should've heard me before you got here. | Ro
You shouldn't touch a pig unless it hasn't been in the mud.
You showed admirable restraint for one so small. | Worf
You simply *must* stop taking advice from other people., Melissa Timberman
You simply must stop taking advice from other people. Melissa Timberman
You still need the last file you removed.
You take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame. Erica Jong
You teach best what you most need to learn. Richard Bach
You tell 'em Banana, You've been skinned.
You tell 'em Bank, You're safe.
You tell 'em Bean, He's stringing you.
You tell 'em Brake, You've got the drag.
You tell 'em Butcher, You've got a lot of tongue.
You tell 'em Calendar, You've got lots of dates.
You tell 'em Cashier, I'm a poor teller.
You tell 'em Cat, That's what you're fur.
You tell 'em Cemetrey, You are so grave.
You tell 'em Chloroform, You can put them to sleep.
You tell 'em Church Bell, I told you.
You tell 'em Cigarette, You're lit up.
You tell 'em Clock, You've got the time.
You tell 'em Cucumber, I've been pickled.
You tell 'em Custard Pie, You've got the crust.
You tell 'em Dentist, You've got the pull.
You tell 'em Dictionary, You're full of information.
You tell 'em Doctor, You've got the patience.
You tell 'em Dough, You're well bred.
You tell 'em Electricity, You can shock 'em.
You tell 'em Envelope, You're well posted.
You tell 'em Gambler, You've got winning ways.
You tell 'em Goldfish, You've been around the globe.
You tell 'em Hard-Boiled Egg, You're hard to beat.
You tell 'em Horse, You carry a tale.
You tell 'em Hunter, I'm game.
You tell 'em June, And don't July.
You tell 'em Manicurist, I've been trimmed.
You tell 'em Moon, You're out all night.
You tell 'em Mountain, I'm only a bluff.
You tell 'em Operator, You've got their number.
You tell 'em Owl, You're wise.
You tell 'em Piano, You're upright and square.
You tell 'em Printer, I'm not your type.
You tell 'em Railway, It's not along my line.
You tell 'em September Morn, No one has anything on you.
You tell 'em Shoemaker, You know awl.
You tell 'em Simon, I'll Legree.
You tell 'em Skyscraper, You have more than one story.
You tell 'em Submarine, I can't seaplane.
You tell 'em Teacher, You've got the class.
You tell 'em cabbage, You've got the head.
You tell 'em playing cards, You know the joker.
You tell 'em, Bald Head, You're smooth.
You threw out my WHAT?
You tread upon my patience.
You tune a guitar but you can't tunafish.
You understand human nature and sympathize with its weakness.
You used to be indecisive.  Now you're not sure.
You wake up in the morning, and your purse is magically filled with twenty-four hours of unmanufactured tissue of the universe of your life! It is yours. It is the most precious of possessions. No one can take it from you. And no one receives either more or less than you receive. Dr. Thomas A Bennett
You want I should bop you with this here Lollipop?!?
You want a fortune?  I'll give you a fortune.  "Blech!"
You want a fortune?  I'll give you a fortune.  "Blech"
You want it when??
You want me to pay for bug fixes ?
You wear a hat so you'll know which end to wipe!
You were a stranger to sorrow; thus fate has cursed you.
You will always be successful in your business or professional career.
You will always get what you want through your charm and personality.
You will always have good luck in your personal affairs.
You will attract cultured and artistic people to your home.
You will be a great success both in the business world and society.
You will be a guest at a happy party that'll have important consequences for you.
You will be a winner today.  Pick a fight with a four-year-old.
You will be a winner today. Pick a fight with a three-year old.
You will be advanced socially, without any special effort on your part.
You will be aided greatly by a person whom you thought to be unimportant.
You will be audited by the Internal Revenue Service.
You will be awarded a medal for disregarding safety in saving someone.
You will be awarded some great honor.
You will be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize--posthumously.
You will be better advised to watch what we do instead of what we say. John N. Mitchell
You will be called upon to help a friend in trouble.
You will be given a post of trust and responsibility.
You will be held hostage by a radical group.
You will be honored for contributing your time and skill to a worthy cause.
You will be imprisoned for contributing your time and skill to a bank robbery.
You will be invited to dine with many important people.  Once.
You will be made happy by receipt of good news.
You will be married within a year.
You will be misunderstood by everyone.
You will be pleased to know I stand obediently for the national anthem, though of course I would defend your right to remain seated should you so decide. Ira Glasser, head of the ACLU, conversation with conservative William F. Buckley, 1994
You will be proud in manner but tolerant and generous.
You will be recognized and honored as a community leader.
You will be reincarnated as a toad; and you will be much happier.
You will be singled out for promotion in your work.
You will be squirrely today.
You will be successful in love.
You will be successful in your work.
You will be surprised by a loud noise.
You will be surrounded by luxury.
You will be the last person to buy a Chrysler.
You will be the victim of a bizarre joke.
You will be traveling and coming into a fortune.
You will be unusually successful in business.
You will be where you most desire to be in a short while.
You will be winged by an anti-aircraft battery.
You will become as small as your controlling desire; as great as your dominant aspiration. James Allen
You will become rich and famous unless you don't.
You will die of terminal acne.
You will engage in a profitable business activity.
You will engage in a profitable friendship.
You will enjoy the high praise of solving a problem of long standing.
You will experience a strong urge to do good; but it will pass.
You will feel hungry again in another hour.
You will find men who want to be carried on the shoulders of others, who think that the world owes them a living. They don't seem to see that we must all lift together and pull together. Henry Ford II
You will find my last words in the blue folder. Max Beerbohm, last words
You will find what is not lost and enter where there are no doors.
You will forget that you ever knew me.
You will gain money by a speculation or lottery.
You will gain money by an illegal or immoral action.
You will give someone a piece of your mind, which you can ill afford.
You will have a flat tire before the end of the month.
You will have a head crash on your private pack.
You will have a long and boring life.
You will have a long and healthy life.
You will have a long and unpleasant discussion with your supervisor.
You will have domestic happiness and faithful friends.
You will have good luck and overcome many hardships.
You will have long and healthy life.
You will have many friends when you use a corkscrew.
You will have many recoverable tape errors.
You will hear good news from one you thought unfriendly to you.
You will inherit millions of dollars.
You will inherit some money or a small piece of land.
You will know happy motorcyclist by the bug stains on his teeth.
You will live a long, healthy, happy life and make bags of money.
You will live by the side of the road and help some pilgrim along life's way.
You will live to see your grandchildren.
You will lose an important file.
You will marry your present lover and be happy.
You will meet an important person who will help you advance professionally.
You will need the MANUALS to use this tagline!
You will never 'find' time for anything. If you want time you must make it. Charles Buxton
You will never be younger than you are today...& vice versa.
You will never escape the will of the mob; about the best anyone has ever figured out how to do is herd them into voting booths. Barry Shein
You will never know hunger.
You will not be elected to public office this year.
You will not find poetry anywhere unless you bring some of it with you. Joseph Joubert
You will outgrow your usefulness.
You will outlive those who seek to destroy you.
You will overcome the attacks of jealous associates.
You will pass away very quickly.
You will pioneer the first Martian colony.
You will probably marry after a very brief courtship.
You will reach the highest possible point in your business or profession.
You will receive a legacy that will place you above want.
You will receive a legacy which will place you above want.
You will receive a present, over which you will shed tears of joy.
You will remember something that you should not have forgotten.
You will secure the greatest degree of happiness if you marry young.
You will soon forget this.
You will soon meet a person who will play an important role in your life.
You will soon meet a stranger who will become your friend.
You will soon meet a strangler who will become your fiend.
You will soon take that long awaited vacation.
You will spend the rest of your life in the future.
You will step on the night soil of many countries.
You will step on the soil of many countries.
You will survive the conflagration.
You will triumph over your enemy.
You will visit some faraway land that has long been in your waking thoughts.
You will visit the Dung Pits of Glive soon.
You will win success in whatever calling you adopt.
You will wish you hadn't.
You would if you could but you can't so you won't.
You wouldn't happen to have anything less... ducky?
You'd better stand back... I don't know how big this thing gets.| Adam to Eve
You'd make a perfect stranger.
You'll be called to a post requiring high ability in handling groups of people.
You'll be sorry.
You'll never get dizzy doing a good turn.
You'll never get mixed up if you simply tell the truth. Then you don't have to remember what you have said, and you never forget what you have said. Sam Rayburn
You'll never have a quiet world till you knock the patriotism out of the human race. George Bernard Shaw
You'll pay to know what you really think.
You're a card which will have to be dealt with.
You're a loser when your dog gets a new best friend.
You're all clear now, kid.  Now blow this thing so we can all go home.
You're all over it, like a cheap suit.
You're at Witt's End.
You're dithpicable| Daffy Duck
You're my hero
You're my hero!
You're never a loser until you quit trying.
You're never alone with schizophrenia
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
You're old when you forget how to start your rocking chair.
You're on report, Ensign.  My quarters, 1900 hrs. | Riker
You're one to tell me what I can and can't sense. | Troi
You're only young once, but immature forever.
You're only young once. You're immature forever.
You're so vain, I bet you think this tagline's about you.
You're standing where I want to pee.
You're twisted and sick; I like that in a person
You're twisted and sick; I like that in a person!
You're twisted, perverted, & sick. I like that
You'renotdrunkifyoudon't steponyourhandwalkingtoyourdoor
You've been smoking that stuff again, uh?
You've got to do your own growing, no matter how tall your grandfather was. Irish Proverb It is a profitable thing, if one is wise, to seem foolish. Aeschylus
You've got to have an ace in the hole.
You've reached middle age when all you exercise is caution.
Young blood must have its course, lad, and every dog its day. Charles Kingsley
Young flesh and old fish are best.
Young gorillas are friendly, but they soon learn.
Young men think old men are fools, but old men know young men are fools. George Chapman
Young men think old men are fools; but old men know young men are fools.
Young men, hear an old man to whom old men hearkened when he was young.
Young pigs grunt as as old pigs grunted before them. Danish Proverb
Young programmers are the best! [and the cockiest]
Youngsters remember anything if it happened or not.
Your .ZIP file is open!
Your E-Mail has been returned due to insufficient voltage
Your E-Mail has been returned due to insufficient voltage.
Your aim is high and to the right.
Your aims are high, and you are capable of much.
Your aims are high, and you are incapable of much.
Your analyst has you confused with another patient.
Your are the guiding star of his existence.
Your business will assume vast proportions.
Your business will go through a period of considerable expansion.
Your capacity to keep your vow will depend on the purity of your life. Mahatma Gandhi
Your cart just ran over my dogma
Your cat just ran over my dog.
Your cat's missing?  Have you checked my bumper?
Your children need your presence more than your presents. Jesse Jackson
Your code should be more efficient
Your code should be more efficient!
Your computer account is overdrawn.  Please reauthorize.
Your depth of comprehension may tend to make you lax in worldly ways.
Your descendants shall gather your fruits. | Virgil
Your disk will self-destruct in 5 seconds.
Your domestic life may be harmonious.
Your education begins where what is called your education is over.
Your empty file directory has been deleted.
Your enemies are closing in.
Your enthusiasm will be infectious, stimulating and attractive to others. They will love you for it. They will go for you and with you. Norman Vincent Peale
Your every voter, as surely as your chief magistrate, exercises a public trust. Grover Cleveland
Your feet have balls but not vice versa?
Your first impressions of people are best.
Your friend has a friend; don't tell him. Jewish Proverb
Your friendly neighborhood Atheist.
Your future looks bright.
Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life.
Your heart is pure, and your mind clear, and your soul devout.
Your help will be needed in an embarrassing situation.
Your ignorance cramps my conversation.
Your kindness and generosity cause envy in a powerful person nearby.
Your logic was impeccable, captain.  We are in grave danger.
Your long forgotten kindness to someone will bring a substantial sum of money.
Your love life will be happy and harmonious.
Your love life will be interesting.
Your lover will never wish to leave you.
Your manuscript is both good and original, but the part that is good is not original, and the part that is original is not good. Samuel Johnson
Your mind understands what you have been taught; your heart, what is true.
Your mode of life will be changed for the better because of good news soon.
Your mode of life will be changed for the better because of new developments.
Your mode of life will be changed to 0644.
Your mode of life will be changed to ASCII.
Your mode of life will be changed to EBCDIC.
Your most useful program will be continually improved until it is useless.
Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries
Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries!
Your nature demands love and your happiness depends on it.
Your neat tagline was just stolen by SLMR20 - Thanks!
Your next acquaintance will be the right one.
Your own qualities will help prevent your advancement in the world.
Your place in the path of life is in the driver's seat.
Your present plans will be successful.
Your program is sick Shoot it and put it out of its memory.
Your program is sick!  Shoot it and put it out of its memory.
Your reasoning powers are good, and you are a fairly good planner.
Your resume will be used on the "Tonight Show" monologue.
Your salary will be increased.
Your shoe is ringing.
Your sin, was it of omission, commission, or emission?
Your slogan here.
Your society will be sought by people of taste and refinement.
Your society will be sought by people of taste and refinment.
Your spelling checker,dont write Nome without it
Your statement fully describes the situation partially.
Your step will soil many countries.
Your supervisor is thinking about you.
Your talents will be recognized and suitably rewarded.
Your temporary financial embarassment will be relieved in a surprising manner.
Your temporary financial embarrassment will be relieved in a surprising manner.
Your winning smile is your greatest asset.
Your work is very poor, but at least it's slow.
Yours is no disgrace.
Youth + confidence + myopia = naivete.
Youth comes but once in a lifetime. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. George Bernard Shaw
Youth is a wonderful thung. What a crime to waste it on children. George Bernard Shaw
Youth is in danger until it learns to look upon debts as furies. Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton
Youth is not a time of life, it's a state of mind.
Youth is that period when a young boy knows everything but how to make a living. Carey Williams
Youth is the first victim of war; the first fruit of peace. It takes 20 years or more of peace to make a man; it takes only 20 seconds of war to destroy him. Baudouin I
Youth isn't a time of life but a state of mind.
Youth today must be strong, unafraid, and a better taxpayer than its father. H. V. Wade
Youth, which is forgiven everything, forgives itself nothing: age, which forgives itself everything, is forgiven nothing. George Bernard Shaw
Youthful figure: What you get when asking a woman's age.
Yukon Fred's Pizzeria and Gator Pit
ZEAL: A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced. Ambrose Bierce
ZIPiddy do.ZIPiddy yeay....
ZIPitty do dah, ARCity ay!
ZMODEM has bigger bits, softer blocks, and tighter ASCII.
ZYMURGY'S LABOUR LAW: People are always available for work in the past tense.
Za dvumya zaitsami pogonish'sya, ne odnogo ne poimaesh'. (If you chase two rabbits, you will not catch either one.) Russian Proverb
Zeal is fit only for wise men but is found mostly in fools. Ancient Proverb
Zeal is very blind, or badly regulated, when it encroaches upon the rights of others. Quesnel
Zeal without humanity is like a ship without a rudder, liable to be stranded at any moment. Owen Felltham
Zeal without knowledge is like expedition to a man in the dark. John Newton
Zen T-Shirt: Enlightenment Available - Enquire Within
Zen does not confuse spirituality with thinking about God while one is peeling potatoes. Zen spirituality is just to peel the potatoes. Alan Watts
Zen is discipline in enlightenment. D. T. Suzuki
Zest is the secret of all beauty. There is no beauty that is attractive without zest. Christian Dior
Zmodem has bigger bits, softer blocks, and tighter ASCII
[ This tagline intentionally left blank ]
[<<] [>] [>>] [] [||] [|>]
[Americans will soon observe the 20th anniversary of] Neil Armstrong and Buzz Lukens' walk on the moon. | Vice President Dan Quayle
[DISCLAIMER:  my fingers are epiletic]
[Do not] put too much confidence in experimental results until they have been confirmed by theory. Sir Arthur Eddington
[I am] lord of myself, accountable to none. Benjamin Franklin
[I]nferior [B]ut [M]arketable
[If you can't hear me, it's because I'm in parentheses]
[My customers] usually have to get a ladder to get it [their paper] off the roof or out of the trees. I only hit one out of 100 front porches. Hal Wright, Age 91, Sierra Booster Newspaper Editor and Flying Paper Boy, 1996
[Nuclear war] ... may not be desirable. | Edwin Meese III
[Prime Minister Joseph] Chamberlain loves the working man -- he loves to see him work. | Winston Churchill
[Sir Stafford Cripps] has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire. | Winston Churchill
[The U.S. victory in Gulf war was] a stirring victory for the forces of aggression. | Vice President Dan Quayle
[The US] condones violence in El Salvador. | Vice President Dan Quayle
[W]hen people begin to philosophize they seem to think it necessary to make themselves artificially stupid. Bertrand Russell (Theory of Knowledge)
[\] At 200' No One Can Hear You Scream...[\]
[]<-Put all your complaints in this box. 10 line minimum!
[dignified silence]
\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\TAGLINE////////////////////////
________________________+ Doug +
`1234567890-=\qwertyuiop[]asdfghjkl;'zxcvbnm,./~
`:-| "Fascinating, Captain!" - Spock
`NO GUTS NO GLORY' `NO FEAR'
` -- oh no, a worm in my hard drive!
aaaoooggghhh......aaoogghhh......DIVE!  DIVE!
and sometimes the bear eats you.
butt at laest i coud spel propley!
code code code code eat code code code sleep code code...
cogito ergo . . . get into a lot of arguments
compiled, first screen came up, ship it!!!
dBasers do it in fields.
day++; dollar--;
dollars, and come alone.  I'm serious!
dy(3x^4 + 2x-5)/dx = 12x^3 + 2
f opinion that makes horse races.
f u cn rd ths, itn tyg h myxbl cd.
fflush and then wwash your hands.
fortune: cannot open /lib/games/fortunes
fortune: not found
hAS ANYONE SEEN MY cAPSLOCK KEY ?
if ( !broke ) don't_fix();
if ( original_ver == OK )  don't_upgrade();
if (ThisDay() != MyDay) DosSleep (until NextDay);
if u cn rd ths u 2 cn thnk up shrt clvr tglns
if u cn rd ths u cn bcm a c prgmr!
if(ThisDay()!=MyDay)DosSleep(ulTillNextDay);
if(crash) grab_ankles();kiss_xxx_goodbye()
illegitimati non carborendum
is OS/2 only half an operating system?
kjhf7u2sfgywh... HEY, get the cat off my computer !
look, It's a drunk tank of trombones!
minimalist tagline
mod emo dem ode mod emo dem ode mod emo dem ode mod emo
multitask: Choke on gum and trip simultaniously!
ooooooooonnnnnnnnnn, Oops Cat on the keyboard
pi seconds is a nanocentury. | Tom Duff
pitchfork (n.): used to unload dead babies from boxcars
printf("This is a tagline..."); printf("\nThis is your br
return((usBirdInHand = 2 * InTheBush()));
rm -rf means never having the chance to say you're sorry.
see here now ...
shift key , never heard of it &&&
shift key / never heard of it 111
shift key/ never heard of it1111
strrev(strcpy("xus yti     "+7,"varg")-7)[0]='G'
taH pagh taHbe' - Thought Master William epetai-Shakespea
tagtagtagtagtagtagtagtagtagtagtagtagtagtagtagtagtagtagtagthistaglineproducedbypkzip
teG I sdrawkcaB eroM ehT oG I sdrawroF eroM ehT
terra incognita. [Lat.]
test test test and retest
they're cousins, identical cousins...
this is an empty line
this space for rent
while(math_teacher() == talk) fall_asleep();
why call it Windows 95?   'cos 95% of computers can't run it?
will be illegible.
you empty-headed animal food-trough wiper!
|||||||//////__ __ __ __ __ The domino effect at work.
es re ig m r -- Ռm at eve.
Qu?
yas eh d'tahW.  mih raeh uoy diD
640K ought to be enough for anybody. -- Bill Gates, 1981
Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate ?
At last I'm organized !, he sighed, and died.
Conclusion : the place where you got tired of thinking.
Don't use our trashcan, it's only for apples !
Every little BYTE helps
Florence of Arabia -- feminist camelmanship
He's dead, Jim...
Hi, my Goldfish looks just like yours !
If it works, don't mess with it. -- school graduate
If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster...
Monopoly ? No, we just don't want competition. -- Intel
Put knot yore trussed in spel chequers !
Quick and Dirty Program is only half right.
Socialism and Nazism is the same.  -- Adolf Hitler
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. -- Freud
The abstract means nothing to me! -- Rorschach
This sentence no verb. -- Douglas R. Hofstader
Toto, I don't think we're in DOS anymore...
Wanna byte my bit ?
Healthy, Wealthy and Wise--And I Like It
 Everything is just chemistry! 
 Cruising at 14,400 bps V42bis >
IN CGA COLOR WHERE AVAILABLE۲
IN VGA COLOR WHERE AVAILABLE۲
 This is no test -- repeat, this is no test
 ǹ $|}d/\/\
޺۳ݳݳ <- Will "Hooked on Phonics" teach this?
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͵ An Aardvark is not just for Christmas 
͵ Lycanthopy Nooooooooowwwww ! 
ػؼTAGLINEؼFROMػHELLؼػؼ
hs al h$  r$ n t -- dn't $tl  !
o--Theft Proof Tagline <hehe>
o--Theft resis-
۲ IN STEREO WHERE AVAILABLE 
  Don't panic... it's only a virus !   
h   mM  g !
h$ s  G  g !
h$ s  G ❞ !
癙  ¿ÿ  $x  $  r  $gÿ...
...x}|} $<!!
\/r Sڿ  /\g_i Do ̹S?
..... Tagline bees ! Quick Mom, the Raid !
A force d'tre malheureux on finit par devenir ridicule. -- Xavier de Maistre
A force de plaisirs notre bonheur s'abme. -- Jean Cocteau
A qui a sert d'avoir une bombe atomique avant tout le monde si c'est pour attendre btement que tout le monde l'ait. -- Wolinski
Admirons les grands matres, ne les imitons pas. -- Victor Hugo
Ah ! il faut bien le dire, nous sommes mal, nous sommes trs mal avec le temps. -- Andr Breton
Ah ! qu'on a bien raison de dire, Qu' l'oeuvre seule connat l'ouvrier. -- J Desmahis
Ah, dans ces mornes sjours, Les Jamais sont les Toujours ! -- Paul Verlaine
Aime la vrit, mais pardonne  l'erreur. -- Voltaire
Aimer beaucoup, comme c'est aimer peu ! On aime, rien de plus, rien de moins. -- Guy de Maupassant
Aimer, c'est se surpasser. -- Oscar Wilde
Aimez qu'on vous conseille et non pas qu'on vous loue. -- Nicolas Boileau
Aimons la vrit qui nous reprend, et dfions-nous de celle qui nous flatte. -- Louis Bourdaloue
Ainsi l'amiti n'appartient qu' l'homme, et l'attachement peut appartenir aux animaux. -- Comte de Buffon
Ainsi le sourire s'efface, Ainsi meurt, sans laisser de trace, Le chant d'un oiseau dans les bois. -- Parny
Aprs avoir souffert, il faut souffrir encore; Il faut aimer sans cesse, aprs avoir aim. -- Alfred de Musset
Aprs tout l'amour est un bon matre; la fortune ne saurait nous causer autant de peines qu'il nous fait goter de plaisirs. -- Abb Prvost
Au fond, voyez-vous, le chagrin, c'est comme le ver solitaire: le tout, c'est de le faire sortir. -- Marcel Pagnol
Audaces fortune juvat. La fortune favorise les audacieux. -- Locution Latine
Autrui c'est l'autre, c'est--dire, le moi qui n'est pas moi. -- Jean-Paul Sartre
Avant d'blouir le peuple en lui promettant de l'eau chaude, il faut donc lui fournir des rcipients pour la recueillir. -- Alphonse Allais
Avant de mcher les mots je mange les ides. -- Charles Dullin
Avant de se jeter dans le pril, il faut le prvoir et le craindre; mais, quand on y est, il ne reste plus qu' le mpriser. -- Fnlon
Avant donc que d'crire apprenez  penser. -- Nicolas Boileau
Ave Caesar (ou Imperator) morituri te salutant. Salut Csar (ou Empereur) ceux qui vont mourir te saluent. -- Locution Latine
Avec le talent on fait ce qu'on veut, Avec le gnie on fait ce qu'on peut. -- Julien Green
Avoir sa belle-mre en province quand on demeure  Paris, et vice versa, est une de ces bonnes fortunes qui se rencontrent toujours trop rarement. -- Honor de Balzac
Bonum vinum laetificat cor hominis. Le bon vin rjouit le coeur de l'homme. -- Locution Latine
Bni soit celui qui inventa le sommeil. -- Cervantes
C'est Louis XI qui a dit: "Diviser pour rgner". -- Mrime
C'est au moment o l'on triche pour le beau que l'on est artiste. -- Max Jacob
C'est avec les beaux sentiments qu'on fait de la mauvaise littrature. -- Andr Gide
C'est avec les pauvres que les riches font la guerre. -- Louis Blanc
C'est bon pour les hommes de croire aux ides et de mourir pour elles. -- Jean Anouilh
C'est dans le silence des lois que naissent les grandes actions. -- Le Marquis de Sade
C'est dans les grands dangers qu'on voit un grand courage. -- JF Regnard
C'est faiblesse que d'aimer; c'est souvent une autre faiblesse que de gurir. -- Jean de La Bruyre
C'est l'essence mme du suffrage universel, de ne pouvoir pas stipuler sur sa propre alination. -- Lon Gambetta
C'est l'homme beaucoup plus que l'auteur que l'on verra partout; je parle ternellement de moi. -- Chateaubriand
C'est la plus grande de toutes les faiblesses que de craindre trop de paratre faible. -- JB Bossuet
C'est le devoir qui cre le droit et non le droit qui cre le devoir. -- Chateaubriand
C'est le propre des censures violentes d'accrditer les opinions qu'elles attaquent. -- Voltaire
C'est lorsque vous avez chauss vos pantoufles que vous rvez d'aventures. En pleine aventure, vous avez la nostalgie de vos pantoufles. -- Thornton Wilder
C'est par le malentendu universel que tout le monde s'accorde. -- Charles Baudelaire
C'est plein de disputes, un bonheur. -- Jean Anouilh
C'est pour avoir trop souffert que je ne puis plus souffrir. -- Mme de La Fayette
C'est quand le puits est  sec que nous dcouvrons toute la valeur de l'eau. -- Benjamin Franklin
C'est toujours le gouvernement prcdent qui est responsable des moeurs du suivant, autant qu'un gouvernement puisse tre responsable de quoi que ce soit. -- Charles Baudelaire
C'est un malheur de n'tre point aime; mais c'est un affront de ne l'tre plus. -- Montesquieu
C'est un terrible avantage de n'avoir rien fait, mais il ne faut en abuser. -- Rivarol
C'est une grande difformit dans la nature qu'un vieillard amoureux. -- Jean de La Bruyre
Carpe diem. Mets  profit le jour prsent. -- Locution Latine
Ce got de l'homme sans quoi le monde ne sera jamais qu'une immense solitude. -- Albert Camus
Ce n'est bon  rien de n'tre bon qu' soi. -- Voltaire
Ce n'est pas avec la philosophie qu'on soutient les ministres. -- Anatole France
Ce n'est pas l'esprit qui fait les opinions, c'est le coeur. -- Montesquieu
Ce n'est pas les mdecins qui nous manquent, c'est la mdecine. -- Montesquieu
Ce n'est pas que j'aie vraiment peur de mourir, mais je prfre ne pas tre l quand a arrivera. -- Woody Allen
Ce n'est que par les beaux sentiments qu'on parvient  la fortune. -- Charles Baudelaire
Ce qu'il y a d'admirable dans le fantastique, c'est qu'il n'y a plus de fantastique: il n'y a que le rel. -- Andr Breton
Ce qu'il y a de difficile dans la charit, c'est qu'il faut continuer. -- Montesquieu
Ce qu'on appelle libert, dans le langage politique, c'est le droit de faire des lois, c'est--dire d'enchaner la libert. -- Auguste Vermorel
Ce que d'autres ont russi, on peut toujours le russir. -- Saint-Exupry
Ce qui effraie le plus dans les partis, ce n'est pas ce qu'ils disent, c'est ce qu'ils ngligent ou refusent de dire. -- Louis Blanc
Ce qui m'intresse, ce n'est pas le bonheur de tous les hommes c'est celui de chacun. -- Boris Vian
Ce qui nous fait souffrir avec tant d'impatience la douleur, c'est de n'tre pas accoutums de prendre notre principal contentement en l'me. -- Montaigne
Ce sont les indisciplins qui font plier la discipline. -- Jules Valls
Cela est bien dit, rpondit Candide, mais il faut cultiver notre jardin. -- Voltaire
Celui qui aime crit sur les murs. -- Jean Cocteau
Celui qui ne sait pas se taire sait rarement bien parler. -- Pierre Charron
Celui qui se connat est seul matre de soi. -- Pierre de Ronsard
Certaines mes vont  l'absolu comme l'eau va  la mer. -- Montherlant
Certains Etats, loin de mourir de leur perversit, en ont vcu. -- JA de Gobineau
Cette lchet molle et timide empche ou de voir la Vrit ou de la suivre. -- Blaise Pascal
Ceux qui s'appliquent trop aux petites choses deviennent ordinairement incapables des grandes. -- La Rochefoucauld
Chacun apprend  penser en mme temps qu'il apprend  parler. -- Alain
Chacun conoit les affaires selon la porte de son esprit. -- Richelieu
Chacun dit du bien de son coeur, et personne n'en ose dire de son esprit. -- La Rochefoucauld
Chacun est, dans ce monde, heureux  sa manire. -- JF C- D'Harleville
Chaque ge a ses plaisirs, son esprit et ses moeurs. -- Nicolas Boileau
Chassez le naturel, il revient au galop -- Destouches
Combien de jeunes filles, peut-tre auraient besoin de perdre leur innocence pour conserver leur sagesse. -- G Snac de Meilhan
Comme il est dans les destines de ce pays de trouver des hommes toujours infrieurs aux situations ! Voil le signe implacable, la rvlation chronique de notre dcadence ! -- Jules Ferry
Comme il n'y a pas de fume sans feu... il n'y a pas de feu sans allumage ! -- Georges Faydeau
Comme le souvenir est voisin du remords ! -- Victor Hugo
Comment savoir tout sans vieillir ? -- Fernand Crommelynck
Comment sont nes les barricades ? Pour lutter contre les cavaleries royales, le peuple n'ayant jamais de cavalerie. -- Andr Malraux
Comprendre; toujours comprendre. Moi je ne veux pas comprendre. -- Jean Anouilh
Comprendre, c'est le reflet de crer. -- L'Isle-Adam
Connais toi toi-mme. -- Platon
Contraria contrariis curantur. Les contraires se gurissent par les contraires. -- Locution Latine
Crois-tu qu'en te cherchant tu te trouveras ? -- Alfred de Musset
Crer, c'est matrialiser son imagination, c'est participer rellement  la grande aventure des hommes. -- Arnold Kaufmann
Cdez- moi vos vingt ans, si vous n'en faites rien ! -- JCh de Lacretelle
D'aprs Rousseau, "La libert n'est pas une licence". C'est une Mise A Jour. -- Gisle Prvost
Dans l'attente on souffre tant de l'absence de ce qu'on dsire qu'on ne peut supporter une autre prsence. -- Marcel Proust
Dans l'histoire du monde, c'est encore l'absurde qui a le plus de martyrs. -- E & J Goncourt
Dans la vengeance et en amour, la femme est plus barbare que l'homme. -- Nietzsche
Dans les belles paroles, le coeur ne parle point. -- Nol du Fail
Dans un coeur troubl par le souvenir, il n'y a pas de place pour l'esprance. -- Alfred de Musset
De auditu. Par ou-dire. -- Locution Latine
De chacun selon ses capacits  chacun selon ses besoins. -- R Marx
De l'or, mon Dieu, de l'or, c'est le nerf de l'intrigue. -- Beaumarchais
De la femme vient la lumire. Et le soir comme le matin. Autour d'elle tout s'organise. -- Louis Aragon
De la gloire d'autrui ce qu'on pourrait ter, A la sienne jamais on ne peut l'ajouter. -- Franois Andrieux
De la musique avant toute chose. -- Paul Verlaine
De tout ce qu'il peut y avoir de mauvais, l'habitude est ce qu'il y a de pire. -- Charles Pguy
De toutes les choses srieuses le mariage tant la plus bouffonne... -- Beaumarchais
Depuis que le monde existe on n'a jamais vu deux amants en cheveux blancs soupirer l'un pour l'autre. -- JJ Rousseau
Desinit in piscem. Finit en queue de poisson. -- Locution Latine
Deux choses sont infinies: l'Univers et la btise humaine; mais en ce qui concerne l'Univers, je n'en ai pas encore acquis la certitude absolue. -- Albert Einstein
Dieu a fait l'aliment; le diable  fait l'assaisonnement. -- J Joyce
Dieu fait la libert, l'homme l'esclavage. -- MJ Chenier
Dieu lui-mme doit avoir piti des damns, lui qui leur a refus la grce. -- Georges Duhamel
Dieu n'a cre les femmes que pour apprivoiser les hommes. -- Voltaire
Dignus est intrare. Il est digne d'entrer. -- Locution Latine
Diminuer, sans la dtruire, la vie locale, particulire, au profit de la vie gnrale et commune, c'est le problme de la sociabilit humaine. Le genre humain approche chaque jour plus prs de la solution de ce problme. -- Michelet
Dire que vous pouvez aimer une personne toute votre vie, c'est comme si vous prtendiez qu'une bougie continuera  brler aussi longtemps que vous vivrez. -- Lon Tolsto
Dis-moi ce que tu lis, je te dirai qui tu es, il est vrai, mais je te connatrai mieux si tu me dis ce que tu relis. -- Franois Mauriac
Dis-moi ce que tu manges, je te dirai qui tu es. -- Brillat-Savarin
Dis-moi qui t'admire et je te dirai qui tu es. -- Sainte-Beuve
Divide ut regnes. Divise, afin de rgner. -- Locution Latine
Donec eris felix, multos numerabis amicos. Tant que tu seras heureux, tu compteras beaucoup d'amis. -- Locution Latine
Douter de tout, ou tout croire, ce sont deux solutions galement commodes, qui l'une et l'autre nous dispensent de rflchir. -- Henri Poincar
Du commerce des coeurs les esprits s'enrichissent. -- JF Marmontel
Du sublime au ridicule, il n'y a qu'un pas, disait Napolon [...], et cet clair d'une me de feu qui s'entrouvre illumine  la fois l'art et l'histoire. -- Victor Hugo
Ds que la guerre est dclare, impossible de tenir les potes. La rime, c'est encore le meilleur tambour. -- Jean Giraudoux
Ecrire, surtout des pomes, gale transpirer. L'oeuvre est une sueur. -- Jean Cocteau
Emanciper la femme, c'est excellent; mais il faudrait avant tout lui enseigner l'usage de la libert. -- Emile Zola
En Afrique, on rve l'Inde comme en Europe on rve l'Afrique, l'idal rayonne toujours au-del de notre horizon actuel. -- Grard de Nerval
En France, on laisse en repos ceux qui mettent le feu et on perscute ceux qui sonnent le tocsin. -- Chamfort
En amour, une faveur qui n'est pas exclusive est une injure. -- JJ Rousseau
En ayant plus d'ides, ils eurent plus de souffrance. -- Gustave Flaubert
En fait de vrits inutiles, l'erreur n'a rien de pire que l'ignorance. -- JJ Rousseau
En morale il faut atteindre le milieu, il faut aspirer au fate. -- Joubert
En politique toute faute est un crime. -- Eugne Chatelain
Entre personnes sans cesse en prsence, la haine et l'amour vont toujours croissant: on trouve  tout moment des raisons pour s'aimer ou se har mieux. -- Honor de Balzac
Eppur (ou E pur), si muove ! Et pourtant elle tourne ! -- Locution Latine
Errare humanun est. Il est de la nature de l'homme de se tromper. -- Locution Latine
Et ceci se passait dans des temps trs anciens. -- Victor Hugo
Et ceux qui ne font rien ne se trompent jamais. -- Thodore de Banville
Et devant l'infini, pour qui tout est pareil, Il est donc aussi grand d'tre homme que soleil ! -- Lamartine
Et l'on voit de la flamme aux yeux des jeunes gens, Mais dans l'oeil du vieillard, on voit de la lumire. -- Victor Hugo
Et le combat cessa, faute de combattants. -- Corneille
Et que l'or est un charme  la vertu fatale ! -- Jean de Rotrou
Et tel, de sa patrie, est devenu l'appui, Qui ne fit rien pour elle, et qui fit tout pour lui. -- JF Marmontel
Etre le premier amant d'une femme ne signifie rien; il faut tre son dernier amant; tout est l. -- M Donnay
Etre philosophe, ce n'est pas crire, c'est vivre. -- F Timmermans
Etre torchon. Ne pas se mlanger avec les serviettes. -- Jean Cocteau
Exception: telle est la rgle en art et en littrature. -- Philippe Sollers
Faire confiance aux hommes c'est dj se faire tuer un peu. -- Cline
Faire, c'est agir. C'est parce que nos actes nous suivent, que nos crits nous suivent. -- Franois Mauriac
Faites ce que je dis et non pas ce que j'ai fait. -- Casimir Delavigne
Faites-moi de bonne politique, je vous ferai de bonnes finances. -- JD Baron Louis
Faut-il qu'un homme soit tomb bas pour se croire heureux. -- Charles Baudelaire
Felix qui potuit rerum cognoscere causas. Heureux celui qui a pu pntrer les causes secrtes des choses. -- Locution Latine
Fiert, raison et richesse, il faudra que tout se rende. Quand l'amour parle, il est matre. -- Marivaux
Flatter les vices du peuple est encore plus lche et plus sale que de flatter les vices des grands. -- Charles Pguy
Fruits et racines ont mme commune mesure qui est l'arbre. -- Saint-Exupry
Guerre  la rhtorique et paix  la syntaxe. -- Victor Hugo
Heureux celui qui peut d'une aile vigoureuse, S'lancer vers les champs lumineux et sereins ! -- Charles Baudelaire
Heureux qui dans ses vers, sait d'une voix lgre, Passer du grave au doux, du plaisant au svre ! -- Nicolas Boileau
Heureux tu compteras des amitis sans nombre, mais adieu les amis, si le temps devient sombre. -- F Ponsard
Homme libre, toujours tu chriras la mer ! -- Charles Baudelaire
Homo homini lupus. L'homme est un loup pour l'homme. -- Locution Latine
Hlas ! de vains dsirs si longtemps enflamms, Faut-il toujours aimer o l'on n'est point aim ! -- JR de Segrais
Il aime les femmes distantes, mais de prs. -- Jean Giraudoux
Il en est des baisers comme des confidences: il s'attirent, ils s'acclrent, ils s'chauffent les uns par les autres. -- Denon
Il est absolument monstrueux de voir comme, derrire votre dos, les gens disent de vous des choses qui sont entirement et absolument vraies. -- Oscar Wilde
Il est bon de lire entre les lignes, cela fatigue moins les yeux. -- Sacha Guitry
Il est bon de suivre sa pente pourvu que ce soit en montant. -- Andr Gide
Il est des vrits qui peuvent tuer un peuple. -- Jean Giraudoux
Il est encore plus facile de juger de l'esprit d'un homme par ses questions que par ses rponses. -- Duc de Lvis
Il est grand temps de rallumer les toiles. -- Apollinaire
Il est plus facile de faire la guerre que la paix. -- Georges Clmenceau
Il est plus facile  l'imagination de se composer un enfer avec la douleur qu'un paradis avec le plaisir. -- Rivarol
Il est plus honteux de se dfier de ses amis que d'en tre tromp. -- La Rochefoucauld
Il est souvent prfrable d'tre trs actif plutt que de penser intensment. -- L Bronfield
Il faut avoir bien du jugement pour sentir que nous n'en avons point. -- Marivaux
Il faut connatre prcisment la porte des esprits auxquels on parle: cela demande une science fort solide et un grand discernement. -- Fnlon
Il faut que l'homme libre prenne quelquefois la libert d'tre esclave. -- Jules Renard
Il faut que tous braves menteurs soient gens de bonne mmoire, pour se garder de mprendre. -- Etienne Pasquier
Il faut se servir des gens selon leurs talents, et compter qu'il n'y en a point de parfaits. -- Mme de Maintenon
Il faut toujours avoir deux ides: l'une pour dtruire l'autre. -- Georges Braque
Il faut tout dire. La premire des liberts est la libert de tout dire. -- Maurice Blanchot
Il faut tre intolrant pour tre libre. -- Georges Darien
Il n'appartient qu'aux grands hommes d'avoir de grands dfauts. -- La Rochefoucauld
Il n'est de grand amour qu' l'ombre d'un grand rve. -- Edmond Rostand
Il n'est meilleur ami ni parent que soi-mme. -- Jean de La Fontaine
Il n'est pas de bienfaiteur qui ne songe un peu  lui-mme -- Sophocle
Il n'est rien de plus prcieux que le temps, puisque c'est le prix de l'ternit. -- Louis Bourdaloue
Il n'existe que trois tres responsables: le prtre, le guerrier, le pote. Savoir, tuer et crer. -- Charles Baudelaire
Il n'y a au monde que deux manires de s'lever, ou par sa propre industrie, ou par l'imbcillit des autres. -- Jean de La Bruyre
Il n'y a de beau que ce qui ne peut servir  rien. Tout ce qui est utile est laid, car c'est l'expression de quelque besoin et ceux de l'homme sont ignobles et dgotants, comme sa pauvre et infirme nature. -- Thophile Gautier
Il n'y a de laid dans l'Art que ce qui est sans caractre, c'est--dire ce qui n'offre aucune vrit extrieure ni intrieure. -- Auguste Rodin
Il n'y a pas de grandeur o il n'y a pas de vrit. -- GE Lessing
Il n'y a pas de peine irrmdiable, sauf la mort. -- Colette
Il n'y a pas de vanit intelligente. -- Cline
Il n'y a pas moins de reproche  taire une vrit qu' falsifier un mensonge. -- Etienne Pasquier
Il n'y a point de bte au monde tant  craindre  l'homme que l'homme. -- Montaigne
Il n'y a point de plaisir qui ne perde  tre connu. -- Marivaux
Il n'y a pour l'homme que trois vnements: natre, vivre et mourir. Il ne se sent pas natre, il souffre  mourir et oublie de vivre. -- Jean de La Bruyre
Il n'y a qu'une action utile, celle qui referait les hommes et la terre. -- Albert Camus
Il n'y a qu'une mthode pour inventer, c'est d'imiter. -- Alain
Il n'y a que deux choses immuables et ternelles: le ciel toil au-dessus de nos ttes, et la loi morale au fond de nos coeurs. -- Emmanuel Kant
Il n'y a que la haine pour rendre les gens intelligents. -- Albert Camus
Il n'y a que le premier pas qui cote. -- Marquise de Deffand
Il n'y a rien de plus vrai que l'amiti se rchauffe quand on est dans les mmes intrts. -- Marquise de Svign
Il n'y a rellement ni beau style, ni beau dessin, ni belle couleur: il n'y a qu'une seule beaut, celle de la vrit qui se rvle. -- Auguste Rodin
Il n'y au monde que deux classes d'hommes: ceux qui ont et ceux qui gagnent. Les premiers se couchent, les autres se remuent. -- Alfred de Vigny
Il ne faut dlibrer qu'entre gens qui peuvent s'entendre, combiner son action en petit comit, et arriver arm aux runions, qu'on prend d'assaut. -- Jules Ferry
Il ne faut pas de tout pour faire un monde. Il faut du bonheur et rien d'autre. -- Paul Eluard
Il ne faut pas imiter ce qu'on veut crer. -- George Braque
Il ne faut pas toucher aux idoles: la dorure en reste aux mains. -- Gustave Flaubert
Il ne faut pas tre plus royaliste que le roi. -- Chateaubriand
Il ne faut plus de force  supporter le malheur qu' bien user de la bonne fortune. -- M de Scudry
Il ne faut point parler de corde dans la maison d'un pendu. -- Cervantes
Il ne faut regarder dans ses amis que la seule vertu qui nous attache  eux, sans aucun examen de leur bonne ou de leur mauvaise fortune. -- Jean de La Bruyre
Il ne suffit pas d'tre des hros. Nous voulons tre des vainqueurs. -- Georges Clmenceau
Il ne suffit pas d'tre heureux; encore faut-il que les autres soient malheureux. -- Jules Renard
Il ne suffit pas d'tre un grand, il faut l'tre au bon moment. -- G Pompidou
Il ne suffit pas de dire: Je me suis tromp; il faut dire comment on s'est tromp, et c'est l prcisment ce qui est important. -- Claude Bernard
Il nous faut abtir pour nous assagir, et nous blouir pour nous guider. -- Montaigne
Il parat qu'on n'apprend pas  mourir en tuant les autres. -- Chateaubriand
Il pleut, il pleut bergre... -- Fabre d'Eglantine
Il s'agit aujourd'hui, non plus de couper les ttes mais d'ouvrir les intelligences. -- Henri Rochefort
Il suffit de bien juger pour bien faire. -- Descartes
Il suffit de penser pour tre homme d'esprit; il faut imaginer pour tre pote. -- Cardinal de Bernis
Il tournait dans son dsir, comme un prisonnier dans son cachot. -- Gustave Flaubert
Il vaut mieux danser le cancan que d'en faire. -- JL Commerson
Il vaut mieux faire que dire. -- Alfred de Musset
Il y a ainsi un petit nombre d'hommes et de femmes qui pensent pour tous les autres, et pour lesquels tous les autres parlent et agissent. -- JJ Rousseau
Il y a beaucoup  dire contre la charit. Le reproche le plus grave qu'on puisse lui faire, c'est de n'tre pas pratique. -- Georges Clmenceau
Il y a bien autant de paresse que de faiblesse  se laisser gouverner. -- Jean de La Bruyre
Il y a certaines bornes que la nature a donnes aux Etats, pour mortifier l'ambition des hommes. -- Montesquieu
Il y a certaines vrits qu'il ne suffit pas de persuader, mais qu'il faut encore faire sentir. -- Montesquieu
Il y a dans la jalousie plus d'amour-propre que d'amour. -- La Rochefoucauld
Il y a de bons mariages, mais il n'y en point de dlicieux. -- La Rochefoucauld
Il y a des artistes maladroits, il n'y a pas de styles maladroits. -- Andr Malraux
Il y a des circonstances o le mensonge est le plus saint des devoirs. -- Eugne Labiche
Il y a des gens dgotants avec du mrite, et d'autres qui plaisent avec des dfauts. -- La Rochefoucauld
Il y a des livres moraux faits pour exasprer la vertu, des livres amusants qui rabaissent la dignit humaine, des livres gais qui font pleurer par le plus beau soleil. -- E Browning
Il y a deux choses que l'exprience doit apprendre: la premire, c'est qu'il faut beaucoup corriger; la seconde, c'est qu'il ne faut pas trop corriger. -- Eugne Delacroix
Il y a deux espces de sots: ceux qui ne doutent de rien et ceux qui doutent de tout. -- De Ligne
Il y a quelque chose de plus prcieux que l'originalit, c'est l'universalit. Celle-ci contient celle-l et n'en use pas selon les besoins. -- Paul Valry
Il y a telle fille qui trouve  se vendre, et ne trouverait pas  se donner. -- Chamfort
Il y a toujours du bon dans la folie humaine. -- L'Isle-Adam
Il y a toujours un moment o la curiosit devient un pch, et le diable s'est toujours mis du ct des savants. -- Anatole France
Il y a tout l'homme dans chaque homme, avec le meilleur et le pire. -- Louis Lavelle
Il y a trois genres littraires bien diffrents: la posie, qui est chante, le thtre, qui est parl, et la prose, qui est crite. -- Marcel Pagnol
Il y dans les hommes plus de choses  admirer que de choses  mpriser. -- Albert Camus
Ils dnent du mensonge, et soupent du scandale. -- P Royer-Collard
Ils sont quarante, qui ont de l'esprit comme quatre. -- Alexis Piron
Imagination - Cette matresse d'erreur et de fausset. -- Blaise Pascal
In aeternum. Pour toujours. -- Locution Latine
Influencer quelqu'un, c'est lui donner son me. -- Oscar Wilde
Instinct et raison, marques de deux natures -- Blaise Pascal
Ira furor brevis est. La colre est une courte folie. -- Locution Latine
Isabelle, Isabelle, je t'aime ! -- Franois Morice
Ita diis placuit. Ainsi il a plu aux dieux. -- Locution Latine
J'ai appris que pour tre prophte, il suffisait d'tre pessimiste. -- Elsa Triolet
J'ai bti de si beaux chteaux que les ruines m'en suffiraient. -- Jules Renard
J'ai de trs srieuses raisons pour plaindre celui qui n'aime pas la mort. -- Charles Baudelaire
J'ai trop pens pour daigner agir. -- L'Isle-Adam
J'aime mieux une injustice qu'un dsordre. -- Goethe
J'appellerai beaucoup de songes  mon secours, pour me dfendre contre cette horde de vrits qui s'engendre dans les vieux jours. -- Chateaubriand
J'embrasse mon rival, mais c'est pour l'touffer. -- Jean Racine
J'en passe et des meilleurs. -- Victor Hugo
Jamais on ne corrompt le peuple, mais souvent on le trompe. -- JJ Rousseau
Je connais trop les hommes pour ignorer que souvent l'offens pardonne, mais que l'offenseur ne pardonne jamais. -- JJ Rousseau
Je crains ce que je veux, et veux ce que je crains. -- Corneille
Je crois encore qu'on pense  partir de ce qu'on crit et pas le contraire. -- Louis Aragon
Je jure, cher matre, d'adorer toujours les deux desses, Muse et Libert. -- Arthur Rimbaud
Je me presse de rire de tout, de peur d'tre oblig d'en pleurer. -- Beaumarchais
Je me sens trs optimiste quant  l'avenir du pessimisme. -- Jean Rostand
Je me sers d'animaux pour instruire les hommes. -- Jean de La Fontaine
Je n'ai pas voulu que mon pays restt dans le mensonge et l'injustice. On peut me frapper ici. Un jour, la France me remerciera d'avoir aid  sauver son honneur. -- Emile Zola
Je n'aime pas les sdentaires du coeur. Ceux-l qui n'changent rien ne deviennent rien. -- Saint-Exupry
Je n'aime rien tant que d'tre seul. -- Charles Baudelaire
Je ne connais d'autre pch que l'ignorance. -- C Marlowe
Je ne connais que trois manires d'exister dans la socit; il faut y tre mendiant, voleur ou salari. -- Mirabeau
Je ne fais pas grand cas, pour moi, de la critique. Toute mouche qu'elle est, c'est rare qu'elle pique. -- Alfred de Musset
Je ne savais pas que c'tait si simple de faire son devoir quand on est en danger. -- Jean Moulin
Je noircis mes pinceaux du deuil de l'univers. -- Gabriel Legouv
Je parle. Il le faut bien. L'action met les ardeurs en oeuvre. Mais c'est la parole qui les suscite. -- Charles de Gaulle
Je pense donc je suis. -- Descartes
Je reviendrai vainqueur, ou ne reviendrai pas. -- H Meilhac & L Halvy
Je sais bien nanmoins que l'on est pas aim pour aimer, mais enfin c'est une esprance. -- Mme de La Fayette
Je sentis avant de penser: c'est le sort commun de l'humanit. Je l'prouvai plus qu'un autre. -- JJ Rousseau
Je suis arm d'une cuirasse qui n'est faite que de dfauts. -- Pierre Reverdy
Je suis persuad que les anges ne mprisent pas tant les hommes que les hommes se mprisent les uns les autres. -- Montesquieu
Je suis plus sr de mon jugement que de mes yeux. -- Diderot
Je tiens  mon imperfection comme  ma raison d'tre. -- Anatole France
Je vous le demande: toutes les fois qu'on a l'occasion de raliser une mtaphore; doit-on hsiter un seul instant ? -- Alphonse Allais
Je vous rends votre paquet de noblesse; mon honneur n'est pas fait pour tre noble; il est trop raisonnable pour cela. -- Marivaux
Je vous souhaite d'tre follement aime. -- Andr Breton
L'Homme tout menteur qu'il est, ne hait rien tant que le mensonge, et le moyen le plus puissant pour attirer sa confiance, c'est la sincrit. -- Roger de Piles
L'absence diminue les mdiocres passions, et augmente les grandes, comme le vent teint les bougies, et allume le feu. -- La Rochefoucauld
L'absence ni le temps ne sont rien quand on aime. -- Alfred de Musset
L'absurde, c'est la raison lucide qui constate ses limites. -- Albert Camus
L'admiration fatigue souvent l'espce humaine. -- Honor de Balzac
L'aigle btit son aire  la cime des rochers pour y voir de plus loin. -- A Dumas
L'ambition, c'est la richesse des pauvres. -- Marcel Pagnol
L'amiti est l'amour sans ailes. -- Lord Byron
L'amiti est un contrat par lequel nous nous engageons  rendre de petits services  quelqu'un afin qu'il nous en rende des grands. -- Montesquieu
L'amiti est une plante qui doit rsister aux scheresses -- Joubert
L'amour a toujours t pour moi la plus grande des affaires, ou plutt la seule. -- Stendhal
L'amour de la dmocratie est celui de l'galit. -- Montesquieu
L'amour de la justice n'est en la plupart des hommes que la crainte de souffrir l'injustice. -- La Rochefoucauld
L'amour est un grand matre, il instruit tout d'un coup. -- Corneille
L'amour est un sacrement qui doit tre pris  genoux. -- Oscar Wilde
L'amour ne tue pas la mort, la mort ne tue pas l'amour. Au fond ils s'entendent  merveille. Chacun d'eux explique l'autre. -- Michelet
L'amour pour le successeur n'est autre chose que la haine du prdcesseur. -- Montesquieu
L'amour qui nat subitement est le plus long  gurir. -- Jean de La Bruyre
L'amour, l'amiti, l'estime ne forment pas de liens aussi solides que la haine commune. -- Anton Tchekhov
L'amour, le travail, la famille, la religion, l'art, le patriotisme sont des mots vides de sens pour qui meurt de faim. -- O' Henry
L'amour-propre est dans l'amour comme l'intrt personnel est dans l'amiti. -- George Sand
L'amour-propre est le plus grand de tous les flatteurs. -- La Rochefoucauld
L'amour-propre est une curieuse bte, qui peut dormir sous les coups les plus cruels et puis s'veiller, blesse  mort par une simple gratignure. -- Voltaire
L'arbitraire est au moral ce que la peste est au physique. -- B Constant
L'architecture, c'est une tournure d'esprit et non un mtier. -- Louis Jouvet
L'argent est l'argent, qu'elles que soient les mains o il se trouve. C'est la seule puissance que l'on ne discute jamais. -- A Dumas Fils
L'argent est plus utile que la pauvret, ne serait-ce que pour des questions financires. -- Woody Allen
L'argent est trs estimable lorsqu'on le mprise. -- Montesquieu
L'art conteste le rel, mais ne se drobe pas  lui. -- Albert Camus
L'art de gouverner demande plus de caractre que d'intelligence. -- TE Lawrence
L'art du roman est de savoir mentir. -- Louis Aragon
L'art est fait pour troubler. La science rassure. -- Georges Braque
L'art occupe le milieu entre le sensible pur et la pense pure. -- Georg Hegel
L'art venge la vie. -- Luigi Pirandello
L'artiste n'est pas celui qui cre, c'est celui qui sent. -- Andr Malraux
L'artiste qui fait attention  son art est comme le funambule qui ferait attention  ses pieds. -- Paul Claudel
L'asile le plus sr est le sein d'une mre. -- JP C de Florian
L'avarice commence o la pauvret cesse. -- Honor de Balzac
L'avarice perd tout en voulant tout gagner. -- Jean de La Fontaine
L'avenir est ce qu'il y a de pire dans le prsent. -- Gustave Flaubert
L'avenir n'est pas une amlioration du prsent. C'est autre chose. -- Elsa Triolet
L'enfance a des tonnements, la jeunesse des colres. -- Anatole France
L'enfance sait ce qu'elle veut. Elle veut sortir de l'enfance. -- Jean Cocteau
L'enfer, c'est quand tout sera parfait. -- Jean Rostand
L'ennui est une maladie dont le travail est le remde; le plaisir n'est que palliatif. -- Duc de Lvis
L'esprit n'use de sa facult crative que quand l'exprience lui en impose la ncessit. -- Henri Poincar
L'esprit qu'on veut avoir gte celui qu'on a. -- JL B de Gresset
L'exactitude est la politesse des rois. -- Louis XVIII
L'exprience, nom dont les hommes baptisent leurs erreurs. -- Oscar Wilde
L'histoire des plus grands princes est souvent le rcit des fautes des hommes. -- Voltaire
L'histoire est condamne, par un vice de nature, au mensonge. -- Anatole France
L'histoire n'est pas une science, c'est un art. On n'y russit que par l'imagination. -- Anatole France
L'histoire n'tudie pas seulement les faits matriels et les institutions; son vritable objet d'tude est l'me humaine. -- Fustel de Coulanges
L'histoire ne connat ni scrupules ni hsitations. -- Arthur Koesthler
L'homme absurde est celui qui ne change jamais. -- Barthlemy
L'homme est ce qu'il fait ! -- Andr Malraux
L'homme est l'indestructible, et cela signifie qu'il n'y a pas de limite  la destruction de l'homme. -- Maurice Blanchot
L'homme est le seul animal qui fasse du feu, ce qui lui a donn l'empire du monde. -- Rivarol
L'homme est si surnaturel que ce qu'il ralise le moins, ce sont les notions de temps et d'espace. -- Lon Bloy
L'homme est un animal enferm  l'extrieur de sa cage. -- Paul Valry
L'homme est un animal sociable qui dteste ses semblables. -- Eugne Delacroix
L'homme est un loup pour l'homme. -- Thomas Hobbes
L'homme est un miracle sans intrt. -- Cline
L'homme est un sorcier pour l'homme, et le monde social est d'abord magique. -- Jean-Paul Sartre
L'homme est une corde tendue entre l'animal et le surhomme, une corde au-dessus d'un abme. -- Nietzsche
L'homme est une prison o l'me reste libre. -- Victor Hugo
L'homme est  venir. L'homme est l'avenir de l'homme. -- Francis Ponge
L'homme n'a pas besoin de voyager pour s'agrandir; il porte avec lui l'immensit. -- Chateaubriand
L'homme n'a vraiment un pass que s'il a conscience d'en avoir un, car seule cette conscience introduit la possibilit du dialogue et du choix. -- Raymond Aron
L'homme n'est heureux que de vouloir et d'inventer. -- Alain
L'homme n'est ni ange ni bte, et le malheur veut que qui veut faire l'ange fait la bte. -- Blaise Pascal
L'homme n'est ni bon ni mchant, il nat avec des instincts et des aptitudes; la socit, loin de le dpraver comme l'a prtendu Rousseau, le perfectionne, le rend meilleur; mais l'intrt dveloppe aussi ses penchants mauvais. -- Honor de Balzac
L'homme n'est pas fait pour travailler, et la preuve c'est que cela le fatigue. -- Tristan Bernard
L'homme n'existe que par la socit et la socit ne le forme que pour elle. -- Louis de Bonald
L'homme ne peut pas aimer les choses mortelles. Il ne peut aimer que les choses immortelles pendant un instant. -- GK Chesterton
L'homme peut tout inventer, except l'art d'tre heureux. -- Napolon 1er
L'homme s'ennuie du bien, cherche le mieux, trouve le mal, et s'y soumet crainte de pire. -- Duc de Lvis
L'homme srieux est dangereux; il est naturel qu'il se fasse tyran. -- Simone de Beauvoir
L'humanit est une dignit. -- Kant
L'hsitation est le propre de l'intelligence. -- Montherlant
L'imagination est l'oeil de l'me. -- Joseph Joubert
L'imagination est un domaine de rves, l'imaginaire, un domaine de formes. -- Andr Malraux
L'imagination peint, l'esprit compare, le got choisit, le talent excute. -- Duc de Lvis
L'important n'est pas d'inaugurer, c'est d'exceller. De fait, il n'y a pas de certitude dans la nouveaut, sinon qu'elle est passagre. -- Roger Caillois
L'inconnu est une exception, le connu une dception. -- Francis Picabia
L'information n'a d'important que si elle est partage. -- Fernando Rynne
L'injustice est muette, et la justice crie. -- J de Rotrou
L'innovation est de loin notre meilleure arme marketing. Elle ne s'enseigne pas  l'cole; c'est pourquoi nous aurons toujours l'avantage sur nos concurrents qui ragissent telles de vulgaires calculatrices programmables. -- Laurent Binard
L'intelligence dfend la paix. L'intelligence a horreur de la guerre. -- P Vaillant-Couturier
L'ironie me prte du cerveau et du coeur. -- Jules Valls
L'ironie n'enlve rien au pathtique. -- Gustave Flaubert
L'oeuvre d'art, c'est une ide qu'on exagre. -- Andr Gide
L'oeuvre doit s'imposer comme ncessaire, mais ncessaire pour rien. Son architecture est sans emploi, sa force est une force inutile. -- Alain Robbe-Grillet
L'offense nglige  la fin devient ntre; Qui souffre une licence en autorise une autre. -- Jean de Rotrou
L'oisivet est la rouille de l'me. -- Duc de Lvis
L'on craint la vieillesse, que l'on n'est pas sr de pouvoir atteindre. -- Jean de La Bruyre
L'on est bien faible quand on est amoureux. -- Mme de La Fayette
L'opinion est la Reine du Monde, parce que la Sottise est la Reine des Sots. -- Chamfort
L'or et l'argent s'puisent; mais la vertu, la constance, la force et la pauvret ne s'puisent jamais. -- Montesquieu
L'ordre est ce qu'il y a de plus rare dans les oprations de l'esprit. -- Fnlon
L'ordre n'a pas meilleur bouclier que l'tude. -- Louis Blanc
L'ouvrage qui ne touche point et qui n'attache pas ne vaut rien. -- Jean-Baptiste Dubos
L'me se raffine  mesure qu'elle se gte. -- Marivaux
L'criture a ceci de mystrieux qu'elle parle. -- Paul Claudel
L'tat c'est moi. -- Louis XIV
L'ternit, c'est long. Surtout vers la fin. -- Franz Kafka
L'thique c'est l'esthtique de dedans. -- Pierre Reverdy
La Rvolution a commenc par la Dclaration des Droits de l'homme; elle ne finira que par la Dclaration des Droits de Dieu. -- Louis de Bonald
La Science constate, mais n'explique pas: c'est la fille ane des chimres. -- L'Isle-Adam
La bouche sourit mal quand les yeux sont en pleurs. -- Parny
La btise n'est pas mon fort. -- Paul Valry
La chair des femmes se nourrit de caresses comme l'abeille de fleurs. -- Anatole France
La chute des civilisations est le plus frappant et en mme temps le plus obscur de tous les phnomnes de l'histoire. -- JA de Gobineau
La clart est la bonne des philosophes. -- Vauvenargues
La conjugaison ternelle du verbe "aimer" ne convient peut-tre qu'aux mes tout  fait naves. -- Grard de Nerval
La connaissance est la conformit de l'objet et de l'intellect. -- Averroes
La conscience ne peut pas avoir tort. -- Alfred de Vigny
La crainte gouverne le monde, et l'esprance le console. -- Duc de Lvis
La critique devrait, en matire de littrature, tre une sorte de pdagogie de l'enthousiasme. -- Louis Aragon
La critique est aise, et l'art est difficile. -- Destouches
La curiosit des enfants est un penchant de la nature qui va comme au devant de l'instruction; ne manquez pas d'en profiter. -- Fnlon
La destine des nations dpend de la manire dont elles se nourrissent. -- Brillat-Savarin
La dfinition du beau est facile, il est ce qui dsespre. -- Paul Valry
La dvote croit aux dvots, l'indvote aux philosophes; mais toutes deux sont galement crdules. -- Rivarol
La faiblesse est le seul dfaut que l'on ne saurait corriger. -- La Rochefoucauld
La faim qui fltrit l'me autant que le visage. -- Andr Chnier
La famille est le refuge, la perptuation et la considration de cette conscience crpusculaire de l'enfance. -- Paul Ricoeur
La force est la seule garantie de la libert. -- Auguste Blanqui
La fortune ne fait pas le bonheur -- Eugne Labiche
La frontire entre ton got et le mien est invisible; tu ne pourras jamais la saisir: preuve que cette frontire elle-mme n'existe pas. -- Lautramont
La galanterie... n'est point l'amour, mais le dlicat, mais le lger, mais le perptuel mensonge de l'amour. -- Montesquieu
La garde meurt et ne se rend pas ! -- Pierre Cambronne
La gloire est le soleil des morts. -- Honor de Balzac
La gloire est pour le vieil homme ce que sont les diamants pour une vieille femme; ils la parent, et ne peuvent l'embellir -- Chateaubriand
La gloire ressemble au march: parfois quand vous y restez quelque temps, les prix baissent. -- Francis Bacon
La gloire se donne seulement  ceux qui l'ont toujours rve. -- Charles de Gaulle
La gourmandise est l'apanage exclusif de l'homme. -- Brillat-Savarin
La gravit est le bonheur des imbciles. -- Montesquieu
La grce est le vtement naturel de la beaut. -- Joubert
La grve gnrale, tout comme les guerres de la Libert, est la manifestation la plus clatante de la force individualiste dans des masses souleves. -- Georges Sorel
La guerre n'est pas une aventure. La guerre est une maladie. Comme le typhus. -- Saint-Exupry
La gnrosit envers l'avenir consiste  tout donner au prsent. -- Albert Camus
La gnrosit suit la belle naissance: La piti l'accompagne, et la reconnaissance. -- Corneille
La gomtrie est aux arts plastiques ce que la grammaire est  l'art de l'crivain. -- Apollinaire
La haine, c'est la colre des faibles ! -- Alphonse Daudet
La honte n'est pas dans la dfaite; elle n'est pas de se montrer infrieur  l'ennemi mais se dcouvrir infrieur  soi-mme. -- Edmund Spenser
La jalousie n'est belle que sur un visage jeune et ardent. -- Alfred Capus
La jalousie n'est souvent qu'un inquiet besoin de tyrannie applique aux choses de l'amour. -- Marcel Proust
La jeunesse n'a qu'un temps. -- Eugne Labiche
La jeunesse s'enfuit sans jamais revenir. -- Pierre de Ronsard
La justice est la sanction des injustices tablies. -- Anatole France
La justice est souvent le masque du courroux. -- Jean de Rotrou
La justice est une si belle chose qu'on ne saurait trop l'acheter. -- Lesage
La justice, la raison, la bonne administration du travail demandent que les intellectuels, ne soient ni gouvernants ni gouverns. -- Charles Pguy
La langue franaise est une eau pure que les crivains manirs n'ont jamais pu et ne pourront jamais troubler. -- Guy de Maupassant
La langue que le gnie a conquise ne lui permet nullement de tout dire: elle lui permet de dire tout ce qu'il veut. -- Andr Malraux
La lecture des journaux est la prire du matin de l'homme moderne. -- Georg Hegel
La libert c'est un mot qui a fait le tour du monde et qui n'en est pas revenu. -- Henri Jeanson
La libert consiste, non pas seulement dans le DROIT accord, mais dans le POUVOIR donn  l'homme d'exercer, de dvelopper ses facults, sous l'empire de la justice et sous la sauvegarde de la loi. -- Louis Blanc
La libert est impossible  l'ignorant. -- Alain Finkielkraut
La libert est le pain que les peuples doivent gagner  la sueur de leurs fronts. -- Lamennais
La libert est pour la Science ce que l'air est pour l'animal. -- Henri Poincar
La libert est une proprit de la volont de tous les tres raisonnables. -- Kant
La libert n'est pas une licence. -- JJ Rousseau
La libert n'est rien quand tout le monde est libre. -- Corneille
La libert, ce bien qui fait jouir des autres biens. -- Montesquieu
La limite du possible et de l'impossible n'est point plac dans l'enceinte de mes facults. -- P Royer-Collard
La littrature des peuples commence par les fables et finit par les romans. -- Joubert
La littrature est l'expression de la socit, comme la parole est l'expression de l'homme. -- Louis de Bonald
La loi est la runion des lumires et de la force; le peuple donne les forces, et le gouvernement donne les lumires. -- Rivarol
La loi, en gnral, est la raison humaine, en tant qu'elle gouverne tous les peuples de la terre. -- Montesquieu
La louange ple d'une belle chose est une offense. -- Ingres
La lune est le soleil des statues. -- Jean Cocteau
La meilleure finesse, c'est simplesse. -- Jean Lebon
La mission de l'art est de voir l'invisible. -- Jonathan Swift
La misre a cela de bon qu'elle supprime la crainte des voleurs. -- Alphonse Allais
La modestie est au mrite ce que les ombres sont aux figures dans un tableau: elle lui donne de la force et du relief. -- Jean de La Bruyre
La modestie est l'art de faire dire par d'autres tout le bien qu'on pense de soi-mme. -- Philippe Bouvard
La moindre chose contient un peu d'inconnu. Trouvons-le. -- Guy de Maupassant
La moiti du monde, bientt, jouera pour l'autre moiti le rle de garde-chiourme. -- Georges Duhamel
La moquerie est souvent indigence d'esprit. -- Jean de La Bruyre
La mort n'a peut-tre pas plus de secrets  nous rvler que la vie ? -- Gustave Flaubert
La mort ne rvle point les secrets de la vie. -- Chateaubriand
La musique a sept lettres, l'criture a vingt-cinq notes. -- Joseph Joubert
La musique est incomprhensible comme le monde, les femmes et les acrobates. -- Fontenelle
La musique est une rvlation plus haute que toute sagesse et toute philosophie. -- Beethoven
La mchancet dveloppe l'esprit. -- Nietzsche
La mmoire est souvent la qualit de la sottise; elle appartient gnralement aux esprits lourds, qu'elle rend plus pesants par les bagages dont elle les surcharge. -- Chateaubriand
La nature n'a fait ni matre ni esclave. Je ne veux ni donner, ni recevoir d'ordres. -- JJ Rousseau
La notion d'quilibre s'oppose formellement, dans le monde actuel,  celle d'intelligence. -- Marcel Aym
La paix enfin, la paix, que l'on trouble et qu'on aime, Est d'un prix aussi grand que la vrit mme. -- Voltaire
La parole a t donne  l'homme pour cacher sa pense. -- Stendhal
La parole est en effet la physique exprimentale de l'esprit. -- Rivarol
La parole n'a pas t donne  l'homme: il l'a prise. -- Louis Aragon
La parole n'est qu'un bruit et les livres ne sont que du papier. -- Paul Claudel
La patience est l'art d'esprer. -- Vauvenargues
La pauvret ne sera plus sditieuse, lorsque l'opulence ne sera plus oppressive. -- Napolon III
La pense se forme dans l'me comme les nuages se forment dans l'air. -- Joseph Joubert
La plupart des gens ne meurent qu'au dernier moment; d'autres commencent et s'y prennent vingt ans d'avance et parfois davantage. Ce sont les malheureux de la terre. -- Cline
La plupart des livres d' prsent ont l'air d'avoir t faits en un jour avec des livres de la veille. -- Chamfort
La police doit tre une mre et non pas une commre. -- De Ligne
La politique: quelle salet ! -- Gustave Flaubert
La politique a sa source dans la perversit plus que dans la grandeur de l'esprit humain. -- Voltaire
La posie est ce qu'il y a de plus rel, c'est ce qui n'est compltement vrai que dans un autre monde. -- Charles Baudelaire
La posie est le langage de tous les cultes. -- Mme de Stal
La posie est une maladie du cerveau. -- Alfred de Vigny
La posie, c'est tout ce qu'il y a d'intime dans tout. -- Victor Hugo
La principale difficult avec les femmes honntes n'est pas de les sduire, c'est de les amener dans un endroit clos. -- Jean Giraudoux
La raison du plus fort est toujours la meilleure. -- Jean de La Fontaine
La raison est toujours mesquine auprs du sentiment; l'une est naturellement borne, comme tout ce qui est positif, et l'autre est infini. Raisonner l o il faut sentir est le propre des mes sans porte. -- Honor de Balzac
La religion est la maladie honteuse de l'humanit. La politique en est le cancer. -- Montherlant
La religion, c'est l'opium du peuple. -- Karl Marx
La rponse est le malheur de la question. -- Maurice Blanchot
La science du beau est une drlerie invente par les philosophes pour la plus grande hilarit des artistes. -- Emile Zola
La science n'a pas de patrie. -- Louis Pasteur
La seule force, la seule valeur, la seule dignit de tout; c'est d'tre aim. -- Charles Pguy
La sincrit est une ouverture de coeur. On la trouve en fort peu de gens; et celle que l'on voit d'ordinaire n'est qu'une fine dissimulation pour attirer la confiance des autres. -- La Rochefoucauld
La socit ne doit rien exiger de celui qui n'attend rien d'elle. -- George Sand
La socit ne vit point d'ides ngatives, mais d'ides positives. -- CH St-Simon
La socit, qui rapetisse beaucoup les hommes, rduit les femmes  rien. -- Chamfort
La soif insatiable de tout ce qui est au-del et que rvle la vie, est la preuve la plus vivante de notre immortalit. -- Charles Baudelaire
La solitude est une infirmit, voil ce que c'est, on devient seule comme on devient impotente. -- Elsa Triolet
La souffrance profonde de tous les prisonniers et de tous les exils est de vivre avec la mmoire qui ne sert  rien. -- Albert Camus
La statistique est la premire des sciences inexactes. -- E & J Goncourt
La terre est ronde pour ceux qui s'aiment. -- Jean Giraudoux
La terre nous en apprend plus long sur nous que tous les livres. Parce qu'elle nous rsiste. L'homme se dcouvre quand il se mesure avec l'obstacle. -- Saint-Exupry
La timidit rend les hommes farouches, quand ils se font surtout un devoir de ne la pas surmonter. -- Mme de Caylus
La vanit nous rend aussi dupes que sot. -- JP C de Florian
La vertu dans le monde est toujours poursuivie; Les envieux mourront, mais non jamais l'envie. -- Molire
La vertu est le triomphe de la gnrosit sur l'intrt. -- Duc de Lvis
La vertu n'irait pas si loin si la vanit ne lui tenait compagnie. -- La Rochefoucauld
La vertu s'affermit par un remords heureux. -- Voltaire
La vie est un voyageur qui laisse traner son manteau derrire lui, pour effacer ses traces. -- Louis Aragon
La vie est une tempte; il faut s'accoutumer  tenir la mer. -- Alfred de Vigny
La vraie noblesse s'acquiert en vivant, et non pas en naissant. -- Guillaume Bouchet
La vritable cole du Commandement est la culture gnrale. -- Charles de Gaulle
La vrit est en marche, et rien ne l'arrtera. -- Emile Zola
La vrit et la justice sont souveraines, car elles seules assurent la grandeur des nations. -- Emile Zola
La vrit existe: on n'invente que le mensonge. -- Georges Braque
La vrit jette, lorsqu'elle est  un certain carat, une manire d'clat auquel l'on ne peut rsister. -- Cardinal de Retz
La vrit, comme le soleil, ne peut pas rtrograder. -- PH d'Holbach
Laissez donc jouer un enfant, et mlez l'instruction avec le jeu. -- Fnlon
Lato sensu. Au sens large. -- Locution Latine
Le Bonheur tait ma fatalit, mon remords, mon vers: ma vie serait toujours trop immense pour tre dvoue  la force et  la beaut. -- Arthur Rimbaud
Le beau parler n'corche pas la langue. -- Jean Lebon
Le beaucoup savoir apporte l'occasion de plus douter. -- Montaigne
Le bien perdu rend l'homme avare. -- Alfred de Musset
Le bon sens n'aura donc jamais de hros ? -- Armand Salacrou
Le bonheur est dans l'amour un tat anormal. -- Marcel Proust
Le bonheur est exigeant comme une pouse lgitime. -- Jean Giraudoux
Le bonheur est salutaire pour les corps, mais c'est le chagrin qui dveloppe les forces de l'esprit. -- Marcel Proust
Le bonheur n'est jamais triste ou gai. Il est le bonheur. -- Armand Salacrou
Le but du monde est que la raison rgne. -- Ernest Renan
Le calembour est la fiente de l'esprit qui vole. -- Victor Hugo
Le coeur a ses prisons que l'intelligence n'ouvre pas. -- Marcel Jouhandeau
Le coeur a ses raisons que la raison ne connat point. -- Blaise Pascal
Le concept d'ennemi n'est tout  fait ferme et tout  fait clair que si l'ennemi est spar de nous par une barrire de feu. -- Jean-Paul Sartre
Le consentement des hommes runis en socit est le fondement du pouvoir. Celui qui ne s'est tabli que la force ne peut subsister que par la force. -- Diderot
Le despote en se faisant despote devient esclave. -- Pierre Leroux
Le despotisme a surtout beau jeu lorsqu'il peut rpondre aux peuples qui murmurent: c'est vous-mmes qui m'avez voulu. -- Augustin Thierry
Le destine des individus est encore bien plus obscure que celle des peuples. -- A de Tocqueville
Le devoir des grands Etats est de servir et non de dominer le monde. -- HS Truman
Le devoir est de vaincre, et un inluctable despotisme participe du gnie. -- Mallarm
Le difficile n'est pas de monter, mais, en montant, de rester soi. -- Michelet
Le glaive de la justice n'a pas de fourreau. -- Joseph de Maistre
Le got est le bon sens du gnie. -- Chateaubriand
Le grand ennemi de la France, c'est la culture gnrale qui potise et dramatise l'univers et nous en drobe la ralit. -- Marcel Aym
Le gnie cre, l'esprit arrange. -- Duc de Lvis
Le gnie est plus libre dans un habit flottant. -- MJ H de Schelles
Le gnie reprsente un pour cent d'inspiration et quatre vingt dix neuf pour cent de transpiration. -- TA Edison
Le jour o personne ne reviendra d'une guerre, c'est qu'elle aura enfin t bien faite. -- Boris Vian
Le langage des dieux n'est point fait pour les sots. L'art qui rend immortel ne plat qu' des hros. -- E Louis Boulle
Le lit est l'endroit le plus dangereux du monde: quatre-vingts pour cent des gens y meurent. -- Mark Twain
Le livre est l'opium de l'Occident. -- Anatole France
Le luxe est une sorte d'imposture, par laquelle les hommes sont convenus de se tromper les uns les autres et parviennent souvent  se tromper eux-mmes. -- PH d'Holbach
Le mal se fait sans effort, naturellement, par fatalit; le bien est toujours le produit d'un art. -- Charles Baudelaire
Le manque d'argent est tellement le mystre de ma vie que, mme lorsque je n'en ai pas du tout, il a l'air de diminuer. -- Lon Bloy
Le mariage doit incessamment combattre un monstre qui dvore tout: l'habitude. -- Honor de Balzac
Le masculin est ml de fminit, le fminin est pur. -- Cline
Le mensonge est essentiel  l'humanit. Il y joue peut-tre un aussi grand rle que la recherche du plaisir, et d'ailleurs est command par cette recherche. -- Marcel Proust
Le merveilleux, c'est la contradiction qui apparat dans le rel. -- Aragon
Le moins que l'on puisse demander  une sculpture, c'est qu'elle ne bouge pas. -- Salvador Dali
Le monde a commenc sans l'homme et il s'achvera sans lui. -- Claude Levi-Strauss
Le monde est beau, et hors de lui, point de salut. -- Albert Camus
Le monde est plein de braves gens qui ne voient partout que des gredins. -- Jacques Chardonne
Le monde est un livre dont chaque pas nous ouvre une page. -- Lamartine
Le monde sera sauv, s'il peut l'tre, que par des insoumis. -- Andr Gide
Le motif seul fait le mrite des actions des hommes, et le dsintressement y met la perfection. -- Jean de La Bruyre
Le moyen d'aimer une chose est de dire qu'on pourrait la perdre. -- CK Chesterton
Le moyen de ne pas varier, c'est de ne pas penser. -- Ernest Renan
Le mpris distingu, les rparties sches, s'ils n'imposent pas  l'adversaire, sont  peine des satisfactions intimes. -- Marcel Aym
Le mpris est un sentiment froid, qui ne pousse  aucun procd violent. -- Diderot
Le nationalisme est une maladie infantile. C'est la rougeole de l'humanit. -- Albert Einstein
Le naturel ne se perd pas. Ce qui se dfait d'un ct se refait d'un autre. -- Marcel Aym
Le nvros btit des chteaux en Espagne; le psychotique croit y habiter; le psychanalyste rcolte les loyers. -- J Van Rillaer
Le papillon ne peut pas vivre sans la fleur. -- Jim Manzi
Le petit garon qui jette des pierres dans le torrent et admire les ronds qui se forment dans l'eau, admire en fait une oeuvre o il bnficie du spectacle de sa propre activit. -- Georg Hegel
Le peu que je sais, c'est  mon ignorance que je le dois. -- Sacha Guitry
Le plaisir de la critique nous te celui d'tre vivement touchs de trs belles choses. -- Jean de La Bruyre
Le plus grand bien que nous faisons aux autres hommes n'est pas de leur communiquer notre richesse, mais de leur dcouvrir la leur. -- Louis Lavelle
Le plus grand des larcins est celui de la gloire. -- J de Rotrou
Le plus libre de tous les hommes est celui qui peut tre libre dans l'esclavage mme. -- Fnlon
Le plus prcieux de nous-mmes est ce qui reste informul. -- Andr Gide
Le plus sage se tait. -- Pierre Gringore
Le plus vulgaire des hommes est un artiste ds qu'il mime ses malheurs. -- Alain
Le pome est une grappe d'images. -- Gaston Bachelard
Le pote est celui qui inspire bien plus que celui qui est inspir. -- Paul Eluard
Le privilge des grands, c'est de voir les catastrophes d'une terrasse. -- Jean Giraudoux
Le pcheur est ignorant. -- Descartes
Le savant n'est pas l'homme qui fournit les vraies rponses; c'est celui qui pose les vraies questions. -- Claude Levi-Strauss
Le secret de russir, C'est d'tre adroit, non d'tre utile. -- JP C de Florian
Le sentiment que l'homme supporte le plus difficilement est la piti, surtout quand il l'a mrite. La haine est un tonique, elle fait vivre, elle inspire la vengeance; mais la piti tue, elle affaiblit encore notre faiblesse. -- Honor de Balzac
Le seul mot de libert est tout ce qui m'exalte encore. -- Andr Breton
Le silence des peuples est la leon des rois. -- Mirabeau
Le silence est comme le vent: il attise les grands malentendus et n'teint que les petits. -- Elsa Triolet
Le silence est le parti le plus sr de celui qui se dfie de soi-mme. -- La Rochefoucauld
Le soleil des vivants n'chauffe plus les morts. -- Lamartine
Le sommeil dvore l'existence, c'est ce qu'il y a de bon. -- Chateaubriand
Le symbole des ingrats, Ce n'est point le Serpent, c'est l'homme. -- Jean de La Fontaine
Le tact dans l'audace, c'est de savoir jusqu'o on peut aller trop loin. -- Jean Cocteau
Le talent provient de l'originalit, qui est une manire spciale de penser, de voir, de comprendre et de juger. -- Guy de Maupassant
Le temps dcouvre les secrets; le temps fait natre les occasions; le temps confirme les bons conseils. -- JB Bossuet
Le temps use l'erreur et polit la vrit. -- Duc de Lvis
Le thtre est une de ces ruches o l'on transforme le miel du visible pour en faire de l'invisible. -- Louis Jouvet
Le travail loigne de nous trois grands maux: l'ennui, le vice et le besoin. -- Voltaire
Le visage humain fut toujours mon grand paysage. -- Colette
Le vrai est trop simple, il faut y arriver toujours par le compliqu. -- George Sand
Le vrai moyen de gagner beaucoup est de ne vouloir jamais trop gagner et de savoir perdre  propos. -- Fnlon
Le vrai peut quelquefois n'tre pas vraisemblable. -- Nicolas Boileau
Le vrai rveur est celui qui rve de l'impossible. -- Elsa Triolet
Le vritable patriotisme n'est pas l'amour du sol, c'est l'amour du pass, c'est le respect pour les gnrations qui nous ont prcdes. -- Fustel de Coulanges
Les Hommes sont pervers; ils seraient pire encore s'ils avaient eu le malheur de natre savants. -- JJ Rousseau
Les absents ont toujours tort. -- Destouches
Les affaires ? C'est bien simple, c'est l'argent des autres. -- A Dumas Fils
Les affaires, c'est bien simple: c'est l'argent des autres. -- A Dumas
Les angoisses mtaphysiques sont une grande ressource pour les rats. -- Jean Dutourd
Les artichauts, c'est un vrai plat de pauvre. C'est le seul plat que, quand t'as fini de manger, t'en as plus dans ton assiette que quand t'as commenc. -- Coluche
Les beaux esprits se rencontrent. -- Voltaire
Les choses ne sont pas si douloureuses ni difficiles d'elles-mmes; mais notre faiblesse et lchet les font telles. -- Montaigne
Les choses, que la passion fait faire, paraissent ridicules  ceux qui n'en ont jamais sentie. -- Hortense Mancini
Les colonies sont faites pour tre perdues. -- Montherlant
Les contraires se connaissent l'un par l'autre: l'injustice de l'amour-propre se connat par la justice de la charit. -- JB Bossuet
Les destins n'ont jamais de faveurs qui soient pures. -- Andr Chnier
Les dictatures fomentent l'oppression, les dictatures fomentent la servilit, les dictatures fomentent la cruaut; mais le plus abominable est qu'elles fomentent l'idiotie. -- Jorge Luis Borges
Les enfants flattent quelquefois les veillards, mais ils ne les aiment jamais. -- JJ Rousseau
Les excs de la libert mnent au despotisme; mais les excs de la tyrannie ne mnent qu' la tyrannie. -- Chateaubriand
Les expressions toutes faites sont les plus intelligentes. -- Elsa Triolet
Les faibles dplaisirs s'amusent  parler, et quiconque se plaint cherche  se consoler. -- Corneille
Les faits ne sont rien, ils n'existent pas, il ne subsiste que de nous que des Ides. -- Honor de Balzac
Les femmes sont extrmes: elles sont meilleures ou pires que les hommes. -- Jean de La Bruyre
Les fleuves courent se mler dans la mer: les monarchies vont se perdre dans le despotisme. -- Montesquieu
Les foules  certaines heures sont l'avant-garde de l'ocan humain. -- Louise Michel
Les fureurs des foules sont crimes d'honntes gens. -- Jules Valls
Les gens bien portant sont des malades qui s'ignorent. -- Jules Romains
Les gens qui aiment ne doutent de rien. -- Honor de Balzac
Les gens qui donnent beaucoup sont sujets  prendre de mme. -- Le Pdt de Brosses
Les gens sans bruit sont dangereux: Il n'en est pas ainsi des autres. -- Jean de La Fontaine
Les grandes ides ne sont pas charitables. -- Montherlant
Les grandes oeuvres d'art ne sont grandes que parce qu'elles sont accessibles et comprhensibles  tous. -- Lon Tolsto
Les grandes penses viennent de la raison. -- Lautramont
Les grands embrasements naissent de petites tincelles. -- Richelieu
Les grands hommes, en apprenant aux faibles  rflchir, les ont mis sur la route de l'erreur. -- Vauvenargues
Les grands romans viennent du coeur. -- Franois Mauriac
Les hommes compatissent avec plaisir: mais ils admirent qu' regret. -- JF Marmontel
Les hommes de pense prparent les hommes d'action. Ils ne les remplacent pas. -- G Le Bon
Les hommes donnent l'impulsion aux affaires, et les affaires entranent les hommes. -- Duc de Lvis
Les hommes font les lois, les femmes font les moeurs. -- C de Ligne
Les hommes ne s'attachent point  nous en raison des services que nous leur rendons, mais en raison de ceux qu'ils nous rendent. -- Eugne Labiche
Les hommes rougissent moins de leurs crimes que de leurs faiblesses et de leur vanit. Tel est ouvertement injuste, violent, perfide, calomnieur, qui cache son amour ou son ambition, sans autre vue que de la cacher. -- Jean de La Bruyre
Les hommes sont aussi avares de louanges que prodigues de flatteries. -- Lamennais
Les hommes sont comme les animaux: les gros mangent les petits, et les petits les piquent. -- Voltaire
Les hommes sont des insectes se dvorant les uns les autres sur un petit atome de boue. -- Voltaire
Il faudrait essayer d'tre heureux, ne serait-ce que pour donner l'exemple. -- Jacques Prvert
Les hommes, dit une sentence grecque ancienne, sont tourments par les opinions qu'ils ont des choses, non par les choses mmes. -- Montaigne
Les ides scandaleuses sont de vieilles rengaines qui passent inaperues en s'abritant sous des habitudes. -- Marcel Aym
Les imbciles ont dans la fourberie des grces inimitables. -- Anatole France
Les imbciles s'aventurent l o les anges craignent de mettre les pieds. -- Alexander Pope
Les injures atroces n'ont jamais fait de tort qu' ceux qui les ont dites. -- Voltaire
Les inventions les plus tonnantes et les plus utiles ne sont pas celles qui font le plus d'honneur  l'esprit humain. -- Voltaire
Les jouissances les plus douces sont celles qui n'puisent pas l'esprance. -- Duc de Lvis
Les larmes s'arrtent toujours ds qu'on leur a trouv une utilit. -- Jean Giraudoux
Les livres ont les mmes ennemis que l'homme: le feu, l'humidit, les btes, le temps; et, surtout, leur propre contenu. -- Paul Valry
Les miroirs feraient bien de rflchir un peu avant de renvoyer les images. -- Jean Cocteau
Les obligations que la noblesse impose sont l'honneur et la gnrosit: en France, on y ajoute la politesse. -- Duc de Lvis
Les oeuvres les plus belles sont celles o il y a le moins de matire; plus l'expression se rapproche de la pense, plus le mot colle dessus et disparat, plus c'est beau. -- Gustave Flaubert
Les parvenus sont comme les singes desquels ils ont l'adresse: on les voit en hauteur, on admire leur agilit pendant l'escalade; mais arrivs  la cime, on n'aperoit plus que leurs cts honteux. -- Honor de Balzac
Les passions s'tiolent quand on les dpayse. -- Gustave Flaubert
Les passions sont aux sentiments ce que la pluie est  la rose, ce que l'eau est  la vapeur. -- Joseph Joubert
Les pauvres ont les coudes plus franches que les riches. Au sens propre. -- PJ Hlias
Les peuples seront heureux quand les rois seront philosophes ou quand les philosophes seront rois. -- Denis Diderot
Les peuples une fois accoutums  des matres ne sont plus en tat de s'en passer. -- JJ Rousseau
Les philosophes doivent leur rputation  l'importance des sujets dont ils s'occupent plutt qu' la manire dont ils les traitent. -- Cardinal de Bernis
Les philosophes ressemblent aux toiles qui donnent peu de lumire parce qu'elles sont trop hautes. -- Francis Bacon
Les pires ennemis d'un homme, ce sont ses compatriotes. -- Montherlant
Les plaisirs sont amers d'abord qu'on en abuse. -- Deshoulires
Les plus courtes erreurs sont toujours les meilleures. -- Pierre Charron
Les plus grands coeurs, hlas ! ont les plus grandes peines. -- Thophile Gautier
Les plus grands potes du monde sont venus aprs de grandes calamits publiques. -- Victor Hugo
Les prjugs occupent une partie de l'esprit et en infectent tout le reste. -- N de Malebranche
Les sentiments produisent le courage actif, et la philosophie, le courage passif. -- MJ H de Schelles
Les sots, les paysans et les sauvages se croient bien plus loin des btes que le philosophe. -- Rivarol
Les souvenirs du bonheur pass sont les rides de l'me. -- Xavier de Maistre
Les tragdies des autres sont toujours d'une banalit dsesprante. -- Oscar Wilde
Les vertus se perdent dans l'intrt, comme les fleuves se perdent dans la mer. -- La Rochefoucauld
Les vrits sont des fruits qui ne doivent tre cueillis que bien mrs. -- Voltaire
Les mes, comme la matire, ont des limites. -- Charles de Gaulle
Libert, galit, fraternit ! paroles vaines, funestes mme, depuis qu'elles sont devenues politiques; car la politique en a fait trois mensonges. -- Louis Veuillot
Lorsqu'une oeuvre semble en avance sur son poque, c'est simplement que son poque est en retard sur elle. -- Jean Cocteau
Lorsque l'on n'a pas de quoi rendre, Il n'est pas permis d'emprunter. -- Etienne Pavillon
L tout n'est qu'ordre et beaut, Luxe, calme et volupt. -- Charles Baudelaire
Ma besogne du Dictionnaire de la langue franaise me fait penser  celle d'un amant mdecin oblig de dissquer sa matresse. -- Rivarol
Ma chute originelle, c'est l'existence de l'autre. -- Jean-Paul Sartre
Ma dfinition d'une oeuvre d'art serait, si je la formulais: "Une oeuvre d'art est un coin de la cration vu  travers un temprament. " -- Emile Zola
Ma philosophie est toute du coeur et point de l'esprit. -- Louis Pasteur
Mais mourir c'est souffrir; et souffrir est un mal. -- Lamartine
Mais que diable allait-il faire dans cette galre. -- Molire
Malheur  la connaissance strile, qui ne se tourne point  aimer, et se trahit elle-mme. -- Bossuet
Mens agitat molem. L'esprit meut la masse. -- Locution Latine
Mes cranciers sont de deux espces: les uns ne savent pas que je leur dois; les autres le savent et le sauront longtemps. -- Marivaux
Messieurs, ce que nous vous demandons  tous, c'est de nous faire des hommes avant de nous faire des grammairiens ! -- Jules Ferry
Mirabeau est capable de tout pour de l'argent, mme d'une bonne action. -- Rivarol
Moi, il a fallu que j'attende l'ge de trente-deux ans pour que mon pre me donne son dernier coup de pied au derrire. Voil ce que c'tait que la famille, de mon temps. -- Marcel Pagnol
Mon Dieu, protgez-moi contre mes amis, quant  mes ennemis, je m'en charge. -- Voltaire
Mon pre, un brave homme, me disait: "Ne perds jamais ton ignorance, tu ne pourras jamais la remplacer". -- EM Remarque
Mon verre s'est bris comme un clat de rire. -- Apollinaire
Mon me a son secret, ma vie a son mystre. -- Flix Arvers
Mort, la seule de mes aventures que je ne commenterai pas. -- Franois Mauriac
Mourir pour une cause ne fait pas que cette cause soit juste. -- Montherlant
Mourir, c'est accomplir un acte d'une porte incalculable. -- Anatole France
Mfiez-vous de la vrit, dit ce procureur (parat-il), elle est vraie pour tout le monde. -- Jean Giono
N'estime l'argent ni plus ni moins qu'il ne vaut: c'est un bon serviteur et un mauvais matre. -- A Dumas Fils
Naturam expelles furca, tamen usque recurret. Chassez la nature avec une fourche, elle reviendra en courant. -- Locution Latine
Natre, c'est seulement commencer  mourir. -- Thophile Gautier
Ne faites pas seulement l'aumne, faite la charit: les oeuvres de misricorde soulagent plus de maux que l'argent. -- JJ Rousseau
Ne peut tre beau que ce qui est grave. -- Anton Tchekhov
Ne se porte pas bien qui vit sans tudier. Que dis-je, le repos sans culture intellectuelle, c'est la mort, le tombeau d'un vivant. -- Jacques Peletier
Ne sentirons-nous jamais que le ridicule des autres ? -- Montesquieu
Ne vous y laisser pas surprendre; Un ami si sage et si tendre, Est bien plus dangereux qu'un amant dclar. -- Etienne Pavillon
Ni l'ignorance n'est dfaut d'esprit, ni le savoir n'est preuve de gnie. -- Vauvenargues
Nil novi sub sole. Rien de nouveau sous le soleil. -- Locution Latine
Nos vertus ne sont, le plus souvent, que des vices dguiss. -- La Rochefoucauld
Notre grande erreur est d'essayer d'obtenir de chacun en particulier les vertus qu'il n'a pas, et de ngliger de cultiver celles qu'il possde. -- Marguerite Yourcenar
Notre orgueil nous met si vite au fait de celui des autres, et en gnral les finesses de l'orgueil sont toujours si grossires. -- Marivaux
Nous aimons quelquefois jusqu'aux louanges que nous ne croyons pas sincres. -- Vauvenargues
Nous aimons tant l'humilit dans les autres: quand travaillerons-nous  la former dans nous-mmes ? -- Louis Bourdaloue
Nous aurons le temps d'tre humains lorsque nous serons vainqueurs. -- MJ H de Schelles
Nous avons tous assez de force pour supporter les maux d'autrui. -- La Rochefoucauld
Nous avons un nom propre. Mais l'est-il si souvent ? -- Herv Bazin
Nous n'avons jamais  rougir de nos larmes, car elles sont comme une pluie sur la poussire aveuglante de la terre qui recouvre nos coeurs endurcis. -- Charles Dickens
Nous n'irons plus aux bois, les lauriers sont coups. -- Thodore de Banville
Nous ne savons donc presque rien; cependant combien d'crits dont les auteurs ont tous prtendu savoir quelque chose ! Je ne devine pas pourquoi le monde ne s'ennuie point de lire et de ne rien apprendre. -- Diderot
Nous ne sommes nous qu'aux yeux des autres et c'est  partir du regard des autres que nous nous assumons comme nous. -- Jean-Paul Sartre
Nous ne trouvons gure de gens de bons sens, que ceux qui sont de notre avis. -- La Rochefoucauld
Nous nous consolons rarement des grandes humiliations; nous les oublions. -- Vauvenargues
Nous promettons selon nos esprances, et nous tenons selon nos craintes. -- La Rochefoucauld
Nous sommes beaucoup plus malheureux dans le malheur qu'heureux dans le bonheur. -- Armand Salacrou
Nous sommes habitus  juger les autres d'aprs nous, et si nous les absolvons complaisamment de nos dfauts, nous les condamnons svrement de ne pas avoir nos qualits. -- Honor de Balzac
Nous sommes le premier de tous les franais qui crivmes contre la Rvolution avant la prise de la Bastille. -- Rivarol
Nous vivons dans un monde o l'chec des autres devient plus important que notre propre russite. -- Philippe Bouvard
Nous vous avons donn la libert; sachez la conserver. -- Napolon Bonaparte
Nul n'est mchant volontairement. -- Socrate
Nulla dies sine linea. Pas un jour sans une ligne. -- Locution Latine
Nulle puissance humaine ne peut forcer le retranchement impntrable de la libert d'un coeur. -- Fnlon
O douleur !  douleur ! Le Temps mange la vie. -- Charles Baudelaire
O le beau compliment  charmer une dame, De lui dire d'abord: "j'apporte  vos beauts "un coeur nouveau venu des universits ! -- Corneille
Oderint, dum metuant. Qu'ils me hassent, pourvu qu'ils me craignent. -- Locution Latine
Omnia vincit amor. L'amour triomphe de tout. -- Locution Latine
On admire le monde  travers ce qu'on aime. -- Lamartine
On aime sans raison, et sans raison on hait. -- JF Regnard
On aime toujours  trouver aux choses plus de finesse qu'il n'y en a. -- Le Pdt de Brosses
On blesse l'amour-propre; on ne le tue pas. -- Montherlant
On commence  s'apercevoir que l'on vieillit quand le poids des bougies dpasse celui du gteau. -- Bette Davis
On croit mourir pour la patrie; on meurt pour des industriels. -- Anatole France
On devient moral ds qu'on est malheureux. -- Marcel Proust
On est ordinairement le matre de donner  ses enfants ses connaissances; on l'est encore plus de leur donner ses passions. -- Montesquieu
On finirait par devenir fou, ou par mourir, si on ne pouvait pas pleurer. -- Guy de Maupassant
On n'est jamais servi si bien que par soi-mme. -- CG Etienne
On n'est jamais si heureux ni si malheureux qu'on s'imagine -- La Rochefoucauld
On n'est jamais tromp par celles qu'on voudrait. -- Sacha Guitry
On n'est jamais trop g pour s'instruire. -- Benjamin Franklin
On n'est point un homme d'esprit pour avoir beaucoup d'ides, comme on n'est pas un bon gnral pour avoir beaucoup de soldats. -- Chamfort
On n'crit pas un roman d'amour pendant qu'on fait l'amour. -- Colette
On ne badine pas avec l'amour. -- Alfred de Musset
On ne btit pas l'avenir en automatisant le pass. -- Xavier Dalloz
On ne ment jamais tant qu'avant les lections, pendant une guerre et aprs une chasse. -- Bismarck
On ne met rien dans son coeur; on y prend ce qu'on y trouve. -- Marivaux
On ne nat pas femme: on le devient. -- Simone de Beauvoir
On ne pense que par image. Si tu veux tre philosophe, cris des romans. -- Albert Camus
On ne perd jamais que d'une voix, et cette voix fait la diffrence. -- Marquise de Svign
On ne peut corriger les hommes qu'en les faisant voir tels qu'ils sont. -- Beaumarchais
On ne peut dsirer ce qu'on ne connat pas. -- Voltaire
On ne prte qu'aux riches. Et l'on a raison. Les pauvres remboursent difficilement. -- Tristan Bernard
On ne reoit pas la sagesse, il faut la dcouvrir soi-mme, aprs un trajet que personne ne peut faire pour nous, ne peut nous pargner. -- Marcel Proust
On ne sait jamais qui on pouse; le mariage vous l'apprendra. -- Jacques Chardonne
On ne saurait aller trop loin dans la connaissance de l'homme. -- Emile Zola
On ne saurait rien aimer ou har qui ne soit d'abord connu. -- Lonard de Vinci
On ne se dbarrasse pas d'une habitude en la flanquant par la fentre; il faut lui faire descendre l'escalier marche par marche. -- Mark Twain
On ne triomphe de la nature qu'en lui obissant. -- Francis Bacon
On ne voit bien qu'avec le coeur. -- Saint-Exupry
On offense plus en refusant une prire, qu'en dsobissant  un commandement. -- M de Scudry
On parle beaucoup trop aux enfants du pass et pas assez de l'avenir - c'est--dire trop des autres et pas assez d'eux-mmes. -- Sacha Guitry
On passe souvent de l'amour  l'ambition, mais on ne revient gure de l'ambition  l'amour. -- La Rochefoucauld
On perd ce que l'on tient quand on veut gagner tout. -- JP C de Florian
On peut tre honnte homme et fort mauvais poux. -- JF C- D'Harleville
On s'ennuie quand on aime mdiocrement. -- Crbillon
On sait d'ailleurs que le Dsir n'est pas d'humeur  se contenter d'une femme. -- Claude Perrault
On sait que le propre du gnie est de fournir des ides aux crtins une vingtaine d'annes plus tard. -- Louis Aragon
On sent que (les loups) ce sont des btes avec lesquelles on peut s'entendre, sinon avec des paroles en tout cas avec des coups de fusils. -- Jean Giono
On transmet son sang, on ne transmet pas son gnie. -- Chateaubriand
On tue un homme, on est un assassin. On tue des millions d'hommes, on est un conqurant. On les tue tous, on est un dieu. -- Cline
On veut toujours que l'imagination soit la facult de former des images. Or, elle est plutt la facult de dformer les images fournies par la perception, elle est surtout la facult de nous librer des images premires, de changer les images. -- Gaston Bachelard
Or, l'on reproche svrement  la Vertu des dfauts, tandis que l'on est plein d'indulgence pour les qualits du Vice. -- Honor de Balzac
Oter l'espoir au vice, c'est donner des armes  la vertu. -- Duc de Lvis
O finissent les lois, la tyrannie commence. -- W Pitt
O serait le mrite, si les hros n'avaient jamais peur ? -- Alphonse Daudet
Par Saint-Georges, mais o est donc pass ce dragon ? -- Freddy Mini
Parmi les plaisirs de la vie, la musique ne le cde qu' l'amour, mais l'amour mme est une mlodie. -- Alexandre Pouchkine
Pas besoin de gril, l'enfer c'est les autres. -- Jean-Paul Sartre
Pense avant de parler, et pse avant d'agir. -- Shakespeare
Pense fait la grandeur de l'homme. -- Blaise Pascal
Peu d'oeuvres donnent beaucoup d'amour-propre, beaucoup de travail donne infiniment de modestie. -- Honor de Balzac
Peuples libres, souvenez-vous de cette maxime: On peut acqurir la libert; mais on ne la recouvre jamais. -- JJ Rousseau
Plaisir d'amour ne dure qu'un moment, Chagrin d'amour dure toute la vie. -- JP C de Florian
Plus l'artiste est parfait, plus seront spars en lui l'homme qui souffre et l'esprit qui cre. -- Thomas Eliot
Plus l'offenseur m'est cher, plus je ressens l'injure. -- Jean Racine
Plus le visage est srieux, plus le sourire est beau. -- Ladr
Plus on juge, moins on aime. -- Honor de Balzac
Plutt que le matre d'cole, le critique doit tre l'lve de l'oeuvre. -- Eugne Ionesco
Plutt souffrir que mourir, C'est la devise des hommes. -- Jean de La Fontaine
Potius mori quam foedari. Plutt mourir que se dshonorer. -- Locution Latine
Pour bien crire il faut aimer Racine, et, pour bien faire, aimer Corneille. -- Joseph Joubert
Pour dsirer laisser des traces dans le monde, il faut en tre solidaire. -- Simone de Beauvoir
Pour faire de grandes choses, il ne faut pas tre un si grand gnie; il ne faut pas tre au dessus des hommes; il faut tre avec eux. -- Montesquieu
Pour faire la paix, il faut tre deux: soi-mme et le voisin d'en face. -- Aristide Briand
Pour moi, je n'ai qu'un besoin, celui de russir. -- Napolon Bonaparte
Pour perdre une moisson il ne faut qu'une nuit. -- Charles Beys
Pour progresser, il ne suffit pas de vouloir agir, il faut d'abord savoir dans quel sens agir. -- G Le Bon
Pour qu'un cologiste soit lu prsident, il faudrait que les arbres votent. -- Coluche
Prends donc l'habitude de considrer que les choses ordinaires arrivent aussi. -- Jean Giono
Prenez garde que l'avarice gagne peu, et qu'elle se dshonore beaucoup. -- Fnlon
Proltaires de tous les pays unissez-vous ! -- Karl Marx
Prouve-moi l'inertie de la matire et je t'accorderai le crateur. -- Le Marquis de Sade
Prouver que j'ai raison serait accorder que je puis avoir tort. -- Beaumarchais
Puisqu'ils ont os, j'oserai aussi, moi. La vrit, je la dirai; car j'ai promis de la dire, si la justice, rgulirement saisie, ne la faisait pas, pleine et entire. Mon devoir est de parler, je ne veux pas tre complice. -- Emile Zola
Puisque la morale tire son origine de la politique, comme les lois et les bourreaux, il s'ensuit qu'elle n'est point l'ouvrage de la nature. -- JO de La Mettrie
Punir un assassin de mort, c'est ajouter un crime au crime. -- Blaise Pascal
Qu'est-ce que l'Homme dans la nature ? Un nant  l'gard de l'infini, un tout  l'gard du nant, un milieu entre rien et tout. -- Blaise Pascal
Qu'il est dur de har ceux qu'on voudrait aimer. -- Voltaire
Qu'importe le flacon, pourvu qu'on ait l'ivresse ? -- Alfred de Musset
Qu'une me gnreuse est facile  sduire ! -- Jean Racine
Quand Paris se sent morveux, c'est la France toute entire qui se mouche. -- Marcel Aym
Quand je pourrais me faire craindre, j'aimerais encore mieux me faire aimer. -- Montaigne
Quand l'amour veut parler, la raison doit se taire. -- JF Regnard
Quand la France aura fait entendre sa voix souveraine, croyez-le bien, Messieurs, il faudra se soumettre ou se dmettre. -- Lon Gambetta
Quand la bourse se rtrcit, la conscience s'largit. -- Nol du Fail
Quand la fortune nous exempte du travail, la nature nous accable du temps. -- Rivarol
Quand la haine des hommes ne comporte aucun risque, leur btise est vite convaincue, les motifs viennent tout seuls. -- Cline
Quand le peuple ne parle pas, ne crie pas ou ne chante pas, il ferme les yeux. Il a le tort de fermer les yeux. -- Jean Giono
Quand le vin est tir, il faut le boire, mme s'il est bon. -- Marcel Pagnol
Quand les femmes se ne prtent plus  la mdisance elles s'y adonnent. -- Emile Augier
Quand les lois seront justes, les hommes seront justes. -- Anatole France
Quand les riches se font la guerre, ce sont les pauvres qui meurent. -- Jean-Paul Sartre
Quand mes amis sont borgnes, je les regarde de profil. -- Joseph Joubert
Quand on court aprs l'esprit, on attrape la sottise. -- Montesquieu
Quand on donne un baiser  quelqu'un c'est qu'on avait envie d'tre embrass soi-mme. -- Sacha Guitry
Quand on n'a pas d'imagination, mourir c'est peu de chose; quand on en a, mourir c'est trop. -- Cline
Quand on n'a pas de caractre, il faut bien se donner une mthode. -- Albert Camus
Quand on ne sait rien faire, il faut avoir de l'ambition. -- Wolinski
Quand on ne travaillera plus le lendemain des jours de repos, la fatigue sera vaincue. -- Pierre Dac
Quand on ne veut pas tre faible, il faut souvent tre ingrat. -- Diderot
Quand un philosophe vous rpond, on ne comprend plus ce qu'on lui avait demand. -- Andr Gide
Que de routes prend et que de raisons se donne le coeur pour en arriver  ce qu'il veut ! -- A Dumas Fils
Que l'homme est petit quand on le contemple du haut de la Mer de glace ! -- Eugne Labiche
Que le lecteur ne se fche pas contre moi, si ma prose n'a pas le bonheur de lui plaire. -- Lautramont
Quelqu'un disait que la Providence tait le nom de baptme du Hasard; quelque dvot dira que le Hasard est le sobriquet de la Providence. -- Chamfort
Quelque dlicat que l'on soit en amour, on pardonne plus de fautes que dans l'amiti. -- Jean de La Bruyre
Quelque soit le challenge, rien ne s'opposera au succs d'une quipe dtermine. -- Didier Rochereau
Qui bene amat, bene castigat. Qui aime bien, chtie bien. -- Locution Latine
Qui n'aime point le vin, les femmes ni le chant, il restera un sot toute sa vie durant. -- Luther
Qui ne sent point son mal est d'autant plus malade. -- Corneille
Qui rgne en tyran doit prir en coupable. -- Philippe Habert
Qui veut voyager loin mnage sa monture. -- Jean Racine
Quiconque aima jamais porte une cicatrice. -- Alfred de Musset
Quiconque est souponneux invite  le trahir. -- Voltaire
Quiconque n'a pas de caractre n'est pas un homme, c'est une chose. -- Chamfort
Quiconque ne sait pas souffrir n'a point un grand coeur. -- Fnlon
Quiconque sait aimer, peut devenir aimable. -- JR de Segrais
Quoi de plus absurde que le progrs puisque l'homme, comme cela est prouv par le fait journalier, est toujours semblable et gal  l'homme c'est  dire toujours  l'tat sauvage ! -- Charles Baudelaire
Raconter tout serait impossible. -- Guy de Maupassant
Recevoir, prendre, et demander, voil le secret en trois mots. -- Beaumarchais
Reconnatre un objet usuel consiste  savoir s'en servir. -- Henri Bergson
Redde Caesari quae sunt Caesaris, et quae sunt Dei Deo. Rendez  Csar ce qui appartient  Csar, et  Dieu ce qui appartient  Dieu. -- Locution Latine
Redouter l'ironie, c'est craindre la raison. -- Sacha Guitry
Requiescat in pace ! Qu'il repose en paix ! -- Locution Latine
Riche vilain vaut mieux que pauvre gentilhomme. -- M Regnier
Rien de plus original, rien de plus soi que de se nourrir des autres. Mais il faut les digrer. Le lion est fait de mouton assimil. -- Paul Valry
Rien n'assure mieux le repos du coeur que le travail de l'esprit. -- Duc de Lvis
Rien n'est indiffrent, rien n'est impuissant dans l'univers; un atome peut tout dissoudre, un atome peut tout sauver ! -- Grard de Nerval
Rien ne flatte les gens davantage que l'intrt que l'on prend, ou semble prendre,  leur propos. -- Andr Gide
Rien ne nous rend si grands qu'une grande douleur. -- Alfred de Musset
Rira bien qui rira le dernier. -- JP C de Florian
Rprimez, vous aurez moins  punir. -- Duc de Lvis
S'il est plus satisfaisant pour l'amour-propre de convaincre, il est plus sr pour l'intrt de persuader. -- Duc de Lvis
Sa raison de commettre le crime, c'est prcisment de le commettre sans raison. -- Andr Gide
Sachez couter, et soyez sr que le silence produit souvent le mme effet que la science. -- Napolon Bonaparte
Salut ! demeure chaste et pure, o se devine, La prsence d'une me innocente et divine. -- M Carr & J Barbier
Sans la justesse de l'expression, pas de posie. -- Thodore de Banville
Sans la participation de l'odorat, il n'y a point de dgustation complte. -- Brillat-Savarin
Sauf au prix d'un effort de gnrosit aussi rare que le gnie, on est toujours barbare envers les faibles. -- Simone Weil
Savoir aimer, c'est ne pas aimer. Aimer, c'est ne pas savoir. -- Marcel Jouhandeau
Savoir par coeur n'est pas savoir. -- Montaigne
Se faire tuer ne prouve rien; sinon qu'on n'est pas le plus fort. -- Denis Diderot
Se plaindre de mourir, c'est se plaindre d'tre homme. -- Jean de Rotrou
Se vouloir libre, c'est aussi vouloir les autres libres. -- Simone de Beauvoir
Servir, lutter, faire sa part pour que la vie soit toujours meilleure. -- W Laurier
Seules les choses sont: elles n'ont que des dehors. Les consciences ne sont pas: elles se font. -- Jean-Paul Sartre
Si ces hiers allaient manger nos beaux demains. -- Paul Verlaine
Si ceux qui disent du mal de moi savaient exactement ce que je pense d'eux, ils en diraient bien davantage. -- Sacha Guitry
Si j'avais devant moi l'ternit ce n'est pas la rsignation, c'est la patience que je prcherais. -- Elsa Triolet
Si l'amour ruine des hommes qui ont du bien, il en fait souvent subsister d'autres qui n'en ont pas. -- Alain Ren Lesage
Si l'on n'est pas sensible, on n'est jamais sublime. -- Voltaire
Si la France est un pays des hommes libres, elle est celui des hommes vrais; et cette libert vaut bien l'autre aux yeux du sage. -- JJ Rousseau
Si le doute et l'erreur ont rendu malades les socits modernes, nous savons que Dieu fait les nations gurissables. -- Frdric Ozanan
Si les femmes voulaient s'entendre, Les hommes les plus fins ne seraient que des sots. -- J Desmahis
Si les insomnies d'un musicien lui font crer de belles oeuvres, ce sont de belles insomnies. -- Saint-Exupry
Si nous n'avions pas d'orgueil, nous ne nous plaindrions pas de celui des autres. -- La Rochefoucauld
Si nous n'avions point de dfauts, nous ne prendrions pas tant de plaisir  en remarquer dans les autres. -- La Rochefoucauld
Si nous rvions toutes les nuits la mme chose, elle nous affecterait autant que les objets que nous voyons tous les jours. -- Blaise Pascal
Si on ne comprend pas l'utilit de l'inutile, l'inutilit de l'utile, on ne comprend pas l'art. -- Eugne Ionesco
Si on ne peut plus tricher avec ses amis, ce n'est plus la peine de jouer aux cartes. -- Marcel Pagnol
Si on tait  de certaines gens leur ridicule, il ne leur resterait plus rien. -- CJF Hnault
Si toutes les filles du monde voulaient se donner la main, tout autour de la mer elles pourraient faire une ronde. -- Paul Fort
Si vis pacem, para bellum. Si tu veux la paix, prpare la guerre. -- Locution Latine
Si vous mprisez le corps, supprimez-le. -- Nietzsche
Si vous voulez aller sur la mer, sans aucun risque de chavirer, alors, n'achetez pas un bateau: achetez une le. -- Marcel Pagnol
Si vous voulez avoir des ides propres, changez de chemise. -- Francis Picabia
Souvenons-nous que la tristesse seule est fconde en grandes choses. -- Ernest Renan
Souvent le dsespoir a gagn des batailles. -- Voltaire
Sur les dfauts d'autrui, l'homme a des yeux perants. -- Destouches
Telle est l'invitable loi: les ingalits sociales sont toujours en proportion inverse de la force de l'autorit publique. -- Fustel de Coulanges
Tempus edax rerum. Le temps qui dtruit tout. -- Locution Latine
Tenir le langage est, pour le gouvernement, ncessit. -- Andr Gluksmann
Tous les espoirs sont permis  l'homme, mme celui de disparatre. -- Jean Rostand
Tous les hommes ne sont pas capables de grandes choses, mais tous sont sensibles aux grandes choses. -- Alfred de Musset
Tous les tres viennent de peu, et il s'en faut de peu qu'ils ne viennent de rien. -- Joseph Joubert
Tous pour un, un pour tous. -- A Dumas
Tout a t dit. Sans doute. Si les mots n'avaient chang de sens; et les sens, de mots. -- Jean Paulhan
Tout ce que je demande aux Politiques, c'est qu'ils se contentent de changer le monde, sans commencer par changer la vrit. -- Jean Paulhan
Tout ce qui est autorit me donne envie d'injurier. -- Paul Lautaud
Tout ce qui est beau est indtermin. -- Joseph Joubert
Tout ce qui est exact est court. -- Joseph Joubert
Tout ce qui n'est que suffisant ne suffit jamais. -- Marivaux
Tout conseil est mauvais quand il est impos. -- Franois Ponsard
Tout existant nat sans raison, se prolonge par faiblesse, meurt par rencontre. -- Jean-Paul Sartre
Tout homme a le droit d'tre vaniteux tant qu'il n'a pas russi. -- Disraeli
Tout homme bien portant peut se passer de manger pendant deux jours, de posie, jamais. -- Charles Baudelaire
Tout homme qui vous blme de trop parler de vous, ne le fait que parce que vous ne lui laissez pas toujours le temps de parler de lui. -- Crbillon
Tout le monde se plaint de sa mmoire, et personne ne se plaint de son jugement. -- La Rochefoucauld
Tout parti vit de sa mystique et meurt de sa politique. -- Charles Pguy
Tout a... c'est des histoires de femmes. -- H Meilhac & L Halvy
Toute flamme est un feu humide. -- Joseph Joubert
Toute l'eau de la mer ne suffirait pas  laver une tache de sang intellectuelle. -- Lautramont
Toute ma vie je me suis fait une certaine ide de la France. -- Charles de Gaulle
Toute nation a le gouvernement qu'elle mrite. -- J de Maistre
Toute rvolution qui n'est pas accomplie dans les moeurs et dans les ides choue. -- Chateaubriand
Toutes les bonnes maximes sont dans le monde; on ne manque qu' les appliquer. -- Blaise Pascal
Toutes les grandeurs de ce monde ne valent pas un bon ami. -- Voltaire
Tranchons-en: le merveilleux est toujours beau, il n'y a mme que le merveilleux qui soit beau. -- Andr Breton
Trompez-moi bien et je vous tiens quitte du reste. La vie est-elle autre chose qu'un mensonge ? -- Chateaubriand
Trop de dsirs naissent de trop de force. -- Andr Chnier
Tu quoque, filli ! Toi aussi, mon fils ! -- Locution Latine
Un amant qui ne peut dpenser qu'en soupirs, N'est plus pay qu'en esprance. -- A Combaut
Un art qui a de la vie ne reproduit pas le pass, il le continue. -- Auguste Rodin
Un bon mot n'est un bon mot qu'en ce qu'il dit une chose que chacun pensait, et qu'il la dit d'une manire vive, fine et nouvelle. -- Nicolas Boileau
Un caractre bien fade est celui de n'en avoir aucun. -- Jean de La Bruyre
Un esprit mdiocre croit crire divinement; un bon esprit croit crire raisonnablement. -- Jean de La Bruyre
Un fond de modestie rapporte un trs gros intrt. -- Montesquieu
Un fou ne saurait tre gal en perfection sur le point o il draisonne. -- L'Isle-Adam
Un frre est un ami donn de la nature. -- Gabriel Legouv
Un homme n'est pas malheureux parce qu'il a de l'ambition; mais parce qu'il en est dvor. -- Montesquieu
Un homme qui sait tout comprendre est trs malheureux. -- Maxime Gorki
Un homme sans souvenirs est un homme perdu. -- Armand Salacrou
Un homme seul est toujours en mauvaise compagnie. -- Paul Valry
Un jaloux ne trouve toujours plus qu'il ne cherche. -- M de Scudry
Un jour on sentira la commodit d'avoir un dictionnaire qui serve de clef  tant de bons livres. Le prix de cet ouvrage ne peut manquer de crotre  mesure qu'il vieillira. -- Fnlon
Un langage sonore, aux douceurs souveraines, Le plus beau qui soit n sur les lvres humaines ! -- Andr Chnier
Un livre n'est pas un chef-d'oeuvre: il le devient. -- E & J Goncourt
Un malheureux qui est  jeun, ne raisonne pas du tout comme un malheureux qui vient de faire un bon repas. -- JB Louvet
Un matin, l'un de nous manquant de noir, se servit de bleu: l'impressionnisme tait n. -- Auguste Renoir
Un menteur est toujours prodigue de serments. -- Corneille
Un mdecin consciencieux doit mourir avec le malade s'ils ne peuvent pas gurir ensemble. -- Eugne Ionesco
Un peu de jalousie veille, Un amour heureux qui s'endort. -- Deshoulires
Un peu de passion augmente l'esprit, beaucoup l'teint. -- Stendhal
Un peuple en tat de rvolution est invincible. -- Maxime Isnard
Un peuple malheureux fait les grands artistes. -- Alfred de Musset
Un rve est la moiti d'une ralit. -- Joseph Joubert
Un seul dsir suffit pour peupler tout un monde. -- Lamartine
Un seul tre vous manque, et tout est dpeupl. -- Lamartine
Un sot trouve toujours un plus sot qui l'admire. -- Boileau
Un vritable roi n'est ni mari ni pre. -- Corneille
Un crivain, un penseur ne doit jamais avoir d'influence personnelle. Sinon il cesse d'tre un penseur ou un artiste; il est aptre. -- Lon Blum
Une certaine continuit dans le dsespoir peut engendrer la joie. -- Albert Camus
Une civilisation de l'homme seul ne dure pas trs longtemps. -- Andr Malraux
Une doctrine, quelle qu'elle soit, politique, religieuse ou sociale, ne se produit jamais sans trouver des contradicteurs que d'adeptes, et ne recrute quelques soldats qu'aprs avoir fait beaucoup de martyrs. -- Louis Blanc
Une exprience bien faite est toujours positive. -- Gaston Bachelard
Une femme qui a un amant est un ange, une femme qui a deux amants est un monstre, une femme qui a trois amants est une femme. -- Victor Hugo
Une injustice n'est rien, si on parvient  l'oublier. -- Confucius
Une libert qui ne s'emploie qu' nier la libert doit tre nie. -- Simone de Beauvoir
Une oeuvre doit porter en elle-mme sa signification entire et l'imposer au spectateur avant mme qu'il en connaisse le sujet. -- Henri Matisse
Une seule dmonstration me frappe plus que cinquante faits. -- Diderot
Une cole n'est jamais qu'une halte dans la marche de l'art, de mme qu'une royaut est souvent une halte dans la marche des socits. -- Emile Zola
Veni, vidi, vici. Je suis venu, j'ai vu, j'ai vaincu. -- Locution Latine
Verba volant, scripta manent. Les paroles s'envolent, les crits restent. -- Locution Latine
Vitam impendere vero. Consacrer sa vie  la vrit. -- Locution Latine
Vivre ce n'est pas seulement changer, c'est continuer. -- Pierre Leroux
Vixit. Il a vcu. -- Locution Latine
Voici mon second Proverbe: c'est qu'il faut qu'une porte soit ouverte ou ferme. -- Alfred de Musset
Voici venir l'Hiver, tueur des pauvres gens. -- Jean Richepin
Voici venir l'hiver, lieu des pauvres gens. -- J Richepin
Volontiers on fait cas d'une terre trangre; Volontiers gens boiteux hassent le logis. -- Jean de La Fontaine
Votre bouche dit non; votre voix et vos yeux disent un mot plus doux, et le disent bien mieux. -- Andr Chnier
Voulez-vous apprendre les sciences avec facilit ? Commencez par apprendre votre langue. -- Cardinal de Bernis
Vous ne me dgoterez pas de la guerre. On dit qu'elle anantit les faibles, mais la paix en fait autant. -- Bertolt Brecht
Vous oubliez que les fruits sont  tous et que la terre n'est  personne. -- JJ Rousseau
Vous possdez le talent de charmer; Vous saurez tout, quand vous saurez aimer. -- Parny
Voyez, messieurs, comme ils sont tristes, Les gens qui rvent le pouvoir ! -- H Meilhac & L Halvy
Vrit dans un temps, erreur dans un autre. -- Montesquieu
Warerloo, Waterloo, Waterloo, morne plaine. -- Victor Hugo
il y a une espce de honte d'tre heureux  la vue de certaines misres. -- Jean de La Bruyre
je sais de quelles petitesses meurent les plus grands amours. -- Jean Anouilh
Errare humanum est, perseverare diabolicum. L'erreur est humaine, persvrer est diabolique. -- Locution Latine
I need love and... I need to be loved. -- SC & PF
La douleur se propose comme une solution  la douleur, comme un deuxime amour. -- Marguerite Duras
Dans la mort, il y a une treinte. -- V. Woolf
Se connatre, dtour pour s'absoudre. -- Paul Valry
La supriorit de l'architecte le plus maladroit sur l'abeille la plus experte rside en ceci que l'architecte porte d'abord la maison dans sa tte. -- Karl Marx
J'aime ceux qui ne cherche pas derrire les toiles une raison pour prir ou pour s'offrir en sacrifice. -- Nietzsche
Il n'est pas ncessaire d'esprer pour entreprendre. -- Jean Lartguy
Si mourir, c'est se dsintresser, il a commenc  mourir en mme temps qu'il remet chaque chose  sa juste place. -- Jean Lartguy
C'est une femme amoureuse. Elle a cess d'exister en tant qu'tre raisonnable. -- Jean Lartguy
La sympathie est la clef de la connaissance. -- R. Rolland
Une bonne journe est celle o le pass s'est tenu  peu prs tranquille. -- Jean Rostand
Une vrit est un mensonge qui a longtemps servi. -- Herriet
La haine devra-t-elle toujours engendrer la haine alors que l'amour restera incapable de prolifrer ? -- Moorcock
L'existence est un paradoxe. Tout ce qui est bien est galement Mal. -- Moorcock
La piti tue le vritable amour. -- Moorcock
L'air est apparemment  la mme temprature que mon sang. -- J. Harrison
Vous savez ce qu'est le charme: une manire de s'entendre rpondre oui sans avoir pos aucune question claire. -- Albert Camus
Les hommes ne sont convaincus de vos raisons, de votre sincrit, et de la gravit de vos peine, que par votre mort. -- Albert Camus
Marcher dix jours avec quelqu'un, c'est vivre dix ans avec lui. -- Jacques Lanzmann
Un jour le besoin d'vasion nous saisit comme le besoin d'aimer ou d'tre aim. -- Jacques Lanzmann
Si la citation est un art de bon aloi, l'exactitude de citer un auteur est un talent. Elle nous habitue  la prcision,  l'abngation et, le croiriez-vous  la modestie. -- Karl Petit
Ce qui permet de distinguer un gnie d'un bcheur, c'est sa capacit de voir ce qui se passe et non ce qu'il s'attend  voir. -- J. Brunner
L'ultime but de la science est de fournir une thorie unique qui dcrive l'univers dans son ensemble. -- S. W. Hawking
Etre aim n'est rien. C'est tre prfr que je dsire. -- Andr Gide
Briser le langage pour toucher la vie. -- Artaud
La meilleur faon de gagner du temps, c'est de savoir en perdre. -- JJ Rousseau
J'ai souvent eu l'impression de traverser ma vie comme ces touristes amricains traversent un pays tranger: pour voir le plus de ville possible. -- C. Collard
Je n'ai jamais t que l'ombre folle d'un inconnu qui garde ses secrets. -- Tardieu
L'amour peut driver d'un sentiment gnreux: le got de la prostitution, mais il est bientt corrompu par le got de la proprit. -- Charles Baudelaire
Il existe trois sorte de baiser de femme: furtif, convulsif et agressif. -- M. Vtsyyana
L'absence est  l'amour ce qu'est au feu le vent; il teint le petit, il allume le grand. -- Bussy-Rabutin
Prolonger des adieux ne vaut jamais grand chose; ce n'est pas la prsence que l'on prolonge, mais le dpart. -- E. A. Bibesco
L'idal, quand tu travailles avec les gens, c'est d'abord la fidlit. Qui est une exigence. -- Javan Hristie
Et comme chaque jour, je t'aime d'avantage, aujourd'hui plus qu'hier, et bien moins que demain. -- R. Gerard
Je puis regretter d'avoir menti, d'tre la cause de ruines et de souffrance, mais fuss-je sur le point de mourir, je ne pourrais me repentir d'avoir aim. -- G. Greene
Quand elles nous aiment, ce n'est pas vraiment nous qu'elles aiment. Mais c'est bien nous, un beau matin, qu'elles n'aiment plus. -- Paul Geraldy
Elle tait une de ces femmes qui ont des amis partout, de tout ge, et dans toutes les classes sociales. Elle tait une de ces personnes qui ne regardent pas avant d'aimer. -- A. Bryce Echenique
Elle, elle aimait avant de regarder et c'est comme a qu'elle allait dans la vie, avec un sourire qui rendait les gens joyeux et des yeux verts qui cachaient le secret de sa gait et de sa gnrosit. -- A. Bryce Echenique
Pendant que l'me demande un chose, le plaisir en exige une autre; ainsi l'me, devenue captive du plaisir, devient en mme temps ennemie de la raison. -- Bossuet
Les amis sont dangereux, non point tant par ce qu'ils vous font faire, que par ce qu'ils vous empchent de faire. -- H. Ibsen
Qui jamais ne connut ce que c'est que l'amour, n'a jamais pu savoir ce que c'est que la peine. -- Thomas
Il y a des choses qu'on ne peut dire qu'en embrassant... parce que les choses les plus profondes et les plus pures peut-tre ne sortent pas de l'me tant qu'un baiser ne les appelle. -- M. Maeterlink
Ne pas chercher  forcer quoi que ce soit. Ne pas courir derrire une hypothtique logique. Ne chercher que ce que l'on a envie de faire, l o l'on se trouve bien. -- Frdric Boyer
La beaut est une source inpuisable de joie pour qui sait la dcouvrir. -- A. Carrel
Le plaisir est le bonheur des fous. Le bonheur est le plaisir des sages. -- R.W. Emerson
Ma mmoire et mes sens ne sont que la nourriture de mon impulsion cratrices. -- Anatole France
L'avantage d'tre clibataire, c'est que, lorsqu'on se trouve devant une trs jolie femme, on n'a pas  se chagriner d'en avoir une laide chez soi. -- P. Leautaud
Nous vivons avec nos dfauts comme avec les odeurs que nous portons: nous ne les sentons plus; elles n'incommodent que les autres. -- Marquise de Lambert
Il faut se ressembler un peu pour se comprendre, mais il faut tre un peu diffrent pour s'aimer. Oui, semblables et dissemblables... Ah ! Qu'tranger pourrait donc tre un joli mot ! -- Paul Geraldy
Une lettre parfaite est une lettre qui ne contient qu'une ide. Si vous avez une ide, dites-l et arrtez-vous. C'est dj si beau d'avoir une ide ! -- P. Reboux
Il y a des femmes dont l'infidlit est le seul lien qui les attache encore  leur mari. -- Sacha Guitry
Il est certain que la peur la plus ancienne et la plus profonde dont l'homme ait jamais t la proie est la peur de l'inconnu. -- A. Derleth
N'est-ce-pas merveilleux de se trouver ainsi dans un pays inconnu ? -- P. Highsmith
Il aperu dans ses yeux bleu lavande, les tranges veinures sombres qui irradiaient de sa pupille comme les rayons d'une roue... L'image tait du reste peu approprie et ne rendait gure justice  la splendeur de ses yeux. -- P. Highsmith
Celui qui se perd dans sa passion a moins perdu que celui qui a perdu sa passion. -- Saint Augustin
Il n'y a pas d'autre mort que l'absence d'amour. -- Barjavel
La plupart des hommes ne veulent pas nager avant de savoir le faire. -- Hermann Hesse
Mais si tu as besoins pour ton plaisir de la permission des autres, tu n'est vraiment qu'un pauvre type ! -- Hermann Hesse
Les choses amusantes, il faut les goter jusqu'au bout. -- Hermann Hesse
Tous ceux qui s'approchent d'une femme risquent qu'on se moque d'eux, c'est l'enjeu. -- Hermann Hesse
Quelle est votre ambition ? Devenir immortelle... et puis mourir. -- Godant
On est puceau de l'horreur comme on l'est de la volupt. -- Cline
Je suis les liens que je tisse avec l'autre. -- A. Jacquart
La plupart des gens regardent les choses comme elles sont et se demandent: "pourquoi ?". Moi, je regarde comme elles pourraient tre et je me demande "pourquoi pas ?". -- R. Kennedy
Les paroles servent mal le sens mystrieux des choses, elles dforment toujours plus au moins ce qu'on dit; il se glisse souvent dans les discours quelque chose de faux ou de fou... -- Hermann Hesse
La sagesse d'un homme a toujours aux yeux de certains autres un petit air de folie. -- Hermann Hesse
La trahison est l'apanage des hommes, leur don. -- L. Bodard
La beaut est dans l'oeil de celui qui regarde. -- A. E. Van Vogt
On exprime souvent les mensonges les plus cruels par le silence. -- R. L. Stevenson
Un vritable ami vaut souvent une ribambelle de parents. -- M. Higgins Clark
Qu'est-ce-qu'un ami ? Une me unique en deux corps. -- Aristote
Plus vive est la flamme de la passion, plus rapidement se consume le feu du dsir. -- M. Ennis
Nos coeurs ont trop de chose  se dire pour que nous placions de nouveau entre eux la barrire de nos poitrines nues. -- M. Ennis
Le professeur ne doit pas apprendre des penses... mais  penser. Il ne doit pas porter l'lve mais le guider si l'on veut qu' l'avenir il soit capable de marcher de lui-mme. -- Emmanuel Kant
La chose la plus importante  toute la vie est le choix du mtier: le hasard en dispose. -- Blaise Pascal
L'essentiel n'est pas de gagner mais de participer. -- Pierre de Coubertin
Le temps est un grand matre, il rgle bien des choses. -- Corneille
L'ducation nous apprend les rgles de la vie. L'exprience nous apprend les exceptions. -- M. & A. Guillois
La gait, la sant changent l'hivers en t. -- Dsaugiers
Rien de grand ne se fit jamais sans enthousiasme. -- R.W. Emerson
Le pessimisme est d'humeur, l'optimisme est de volont. -- Alain
L'exprience est un emprunt fait au bonheur. -- Joseph Joubert
Rien ne se perd, rien ne se cre, tous ce transforme. -- Lavoisier
Le vrai philosophe n'attend rien des hommes, et il leur fait tous le bien dont il est capable. Il a l'hypocrisie en horreur, mais il plaint le superstitieux; enfin il sait tre ami. -- Voltaire
Tout est pour le mieux dans le meilleur des mondes possibles. -- Voltaire
Ce qui est tragique dans la vie des hommes, c'est moins leurs souffrances que leurs checs. -- Thomas Carlyle
Tant qu'un peuple est contraint d'obir et qu'il obit, il fait mieux, si tt qu'il peut secouer le joug et qu'il le secoue, il fait encore mieux. -- JJ Rousseau
Tout crivain refait le monde, parce qu'il est impuissant  restituer parfaitement une ralit dont la structure complexe chappe  la parole. -- Jacques Bens
Rien ne m'empchera de penser que l'amnistie est l'expdient des gouvernements faibles. -- Herv Bazin
L'amour est une mer dont la femme est la rive. -- Victor Hugo
I love you but I am not in love with you. -- Woody Allen
Sex without love is an empty experience. -- Woody Allen
Dans les moments difficiles, on se rend compte de la formidable rsistance humaine et de nos capacit d'adaptation. -- Bruno Peyron
Il faut tre rsolument optimiste, bagarreur - On est jamais si peu performant que dans l'incertitude -. -- Bruno Peyron
Mais jouer, c'est vivre, c'est apprendre  vivre. Jouer  aimer, c'est apprendre  aimer. Il faut aimer le jeu, c'est aimer vivre et c'est aimer aimer. Sinon le jeu n'est pas bon, Il est refus de vivre et d'amour. -- Pierre Camarra
IL n'y a d'aventure que s'il y a souffrances, difficults, acharnement  survivre pour atteindre un but, fut-il mythique, rel ou drisoire. -- Jacques Lanzmann
C'est en poussant son corps hors de ses limites qu'il se dfinit le mieux  l'intrieur de ses frontires. Dcouvrir son corps, en mme temps que le paysage travers et les gens rencontrs, donne une signification supplmentaire au voyage. -- Jacques Lanzmann
"Les mystres n'ont jamais t de mon got", dit-il. "Alors la vie elle-mme ne doit pas l'tre davantage". -- Moorcock
Tous les hommes rvent, mais les plus dangereux sont ceux qui rvent avec les yeux ouverts. -- F. Forsyth
Les gens sont larges d'esprit avec les crivains, comme avec tous les autres cingls. -- F. Forsyth
C'tait le premier moment d'attirance, le plus beau, celui o, entre deux tres qui viennent de se rencontrer, rien n'est encore jou: aucune dcision, ni habitude, ni horaire - rien ne presse... -- Ismail Kadar
A l'exception des enfants (qui n'en savent pas assez long pour poser les questions importantes) peu d'entre nous passent beaucoup de temps  se demander pourquoi la nature est telle qu'elle est. -- Carl Sagan
L'amour, c'est l'occasion unique de mrir, de prendre forme, de devenir soi-mme un monde, pour l'amour de l'tre aim. C'est une haute exigence, une ambition sans limite, qui fait de celui qui aime un lu qu'appelle le large. -- R.-M. Rilke
Le bonheur est un parfum que l'on ne peut rpandre sur autrui sans en faire rejaillir quelques gouttes sur soi-mme. -- R.W. Emerson
Vous ne toucherez point un paillon sans faire tomber la poudre qui colore ses ailes; vous n'analyserez point l'amour sans en faire vanouir le charme. -- O. Pirmez
La mort est pour demain; car elle est toujours en avance; il faut cesser de ne pas s'aimer  la folie. Les lunes de miel sont un rve trop fugace; chaque jour doit en tre une. -- A. Jardin
Le suicide n'est qu'une sortie de secours piteuse et illgitime; il est plus beau et plus noble de se laisser vaincre et abattre par la vie elle-mme que par sa propre main. -- Hermann Hesse
Le retard est la politesse des artistes... L'artiste plat autant que par son oeuvre, par sa rvolte contre les conventions. -- Andr Maurois
Aimer: quel mot vague ! Il mle tout: une bagarre bestiale, une tendresse, une maladie... -- Andr Maurois
Un homme mari n'est plus qu'une moiti d'homme. (Et pas la meilleure moiti). -- Andr Maurois
J'aime attendre ce que je n'attends pas. -- Andr Maurois
Le bonheur que l'on attend est plus beau que celui dont on jouit... -- Andr Maurois
Il en est des confidences comme des femmes; celles que nous dsirons trop fort nous fuient, celles que nous redoutons nous poursuivent. -- Andr Maurois
IL pense qu'tant avant tout un actrice, elle joue chaque amour comme un rle nouveau et cherche  le jouer parfaitement. Elle y russit et, tant qu'elle est en scne croit  son personnage. -- Andr Maurois
Et puis l'art semble toujours plus vrai que la nature. -- Andr Maurois
L'amiti disparat o l'galit cesse. -- Abb Aubert
Lorsque je possde un secret, je me garde comme de la peste de prendre des airs de conspirateurs. Je ne modifie en rien mon comportement habituel; et si je parle, j'vite simplement, de mettre la conversation sur une pente dangereuse. -- Isaac Asimov
La culture nous apparat d'abord comme la connaissance de ce qui a fait de l'homme autre chose qu'un accident de l'univers. -- Andr Malraux
La civilisation est la sphre de l'utilitaire, la culture est celle des valeurs. -- Mac Iver.
Aucune philosophie n'a jamais pu mettre fin  la philosophie et pourtant c'est l le voeux secret de toute philosophie. -- Gusdorf
On ne peut apprendre la philosophie; on ne peut qu'apprendre  philosopher. -- Emmanuel Kant
Angoisse mtaphysique: ou l'apaiser avec un Dieu, ou la noyer dans le plaisir, ou la gurir par des pilules. -- Jean Rostand
La seule chose qui nous console de nos misres est le divertissement et c'est pourtant la plus grande de nos misres. -- Blaise Pascal
J'aime les gens distraits; c'est une marque qu'ils ont des ides et qu'ils sont bons: car les mchants et les sots ont toujours de la prsence d'esprit. -- C de Ligne
Savoir, c'est savoir qu'on sait. -- Alain
Il n'y a pour une conscience qu'une faon d'exister, c'est d'avoir conscience qu'elle existe. -- Jean-Paul Sartre
Les hommes veills n'ont qu'un monde, mais les hommes endormis ont chacun leur monde. -- Hraclite
Platon disait que les bons sont ceux qui se contentent de rver ce que les mchants font en ralit. -- Freud
Les sentiments nobles sont devenus moins suspects depuis que la psychanalyse en a dgag les racines ignobles. -- Jean Rostand
Le freudisme, si fameux, est un art d'inventer en chaque homme un animal redoutable, d'aprs des signes tout  fait ordinaires. -- Alain
Seul, notre propre corps peut nous torturer. -- Buytendijk
Il n'y a pas de bonheur intelligent. -- Jean Rostand
L'amour du prochain est attention. Selon la premire lgende du Graal..., le Graal, pierre miraculeuse qui rassasie toute faim, appartient  quiconque dira le premier au gardien de la pierre, paralys et souffrant: Homme, quel est ton tourment? -- Simone Weil
Rien de grand ne s'est accompli dans le monde sans passion. -- Georg Hegel
Le suicide est le dnouement de la passion parce qu'il en est la substance. Toute passion est suicide: oubli de soi sans abngation. -- Lanza del Vasto
Ignoti nulla cupido (Formule scolastique: on ne saurait avoir aucun dsir de ce que l'on ignore. ) -- Locution Latine
Comme l'amour, l'art n'est pas plaisir, mais passion. -- Andr Malraux
Le got est toujours barbare quand il mle les dsirs et les motions  l'apprciation de la beaut. -- Emmanuel Kant
L'habitude est "la transformation de l'vnement en proprit". -- Paul Valry
Si les habitudes vivantes sont un instrument de l'action cratrice, l'homme de l'habitude est un malade qui marche vers sa mort spirituelle. -- E. Mounier
Si l'habitude ne nous simplifiait pas les choses, s'habiller ou se dshabiller suffirait pour nous  l'emploi d'une journe entire. -- Maudsley
La posie montre nues sous une lumire qui secoue la torpeur les choses surprenantes qui nous environnent et que nos sens enregistraient machinalement. -- Jean Cocteau
Toute dcision est un drame qui consiste dans le sacrifice d'un dsir sur l'autel d'un autre dsir. -- Claparde
Etre, c'est agir; l'action est l'existence mme. -- Ravaisson
La caractre d'un homme fait son destin. -- Dmocrite
Le moi se compose d'une me, d'un corps et d'un vtement. -- James
Deviens ce que tu es. -- Nietzsche
Toute crature humaine est un tre diffrent en chacun de ceux qui la regarde. -- Anatole France
Je n'existe que dans la mesure o j'existe pour autrui. A la limite, tre c'est aimer. -- E. Mounier
Dans la solitude il faut agir comme si on tait vu du monde entier et quand on est vu du monde entier il faut agir comme si on tait seul. -- Lavelle
Regarder les vnements de notre propre vie avec les mmes yeux dont nous regardons ceux de la vie d'un autre, c'est une mdecine convenable. Regarder les vnements de la vie des autres comme s'ils taient les ntres, cela nous ruinerait  fond. -- Nietzsche
Le suicide est un mot mal fait. Ce qui tue n'est pas identique  ce qui est tu. -- Jouffroy
Je suis "une chose qui pense" mais "les choses que je sens et que j'imagine ne sont peut tre rien du tout hors de moi et en elles-mmes". -- Descartes
Je ne manque pas de dire que je vois des hommes. Cependant, que vois-je de cette fentre sinon des chapeaux et des manteaux ? -- Descartes
Le solipsisme est un fou enferm dans un blockhaus imprenable. -- Schopenhauer
Il n'y aurait pas pour moi de plus grand chtiment que d'habiter tout seul le paradis. -- Goethe
On cesse d'aimer si quelqu'un ne nous aime. -- Mme de Stal
Comme on vit mal avec ceux que l'on connat trop. Comme on vit mal avec ceux que l'on ne connat pas du tout. Comme on vit bien avec ceux que l'on ne connat pas trop. -- Alain
L'enfer, c'est les autres. -- Jean-Paul Sartre
La solitude est  l'esprit ce que la dite est au corps. -- Vauvenargues
Quelle vanit que la peinture qui attire l'admiration par la ressemblance de choses dont on n'admire point les originaux. -- Blaise Pascal
La musique est une mathmatique sonore, la mathmatique est une musique silencieuse. -- E. Herriot
Demandez  un crapaud ce que c'est que la beaut: il vous rpondra que c'est sa crapaude avec deux gros yeux ronds sortant de sa petite tte. . Interrogez le diable il vous dira que le beau est une paire de cornes, quatre griffes et une queue. -- Voltaire
Le petit chien de M Bergeret ne regardait jamais le bleu du ciel incomestible. -- Anatole France
Quand le langage ne sert plus  donner des ordre ou  dcrire, la couleur  camoufler, la maison  habiter, la plante  nourrir, alors commencent le pome, la peinture, le palais et le parc. -- Roger Vaillant
Le devoir est ce qui est contraire  la nature. -- Schopenhauer
Dans les propositions je me domine, je me cde, je me permets, je et me sont ils diffrents ou non ? On pourrait rduire l'analyse de la morale  dcider si ces deux pronoms sont rellement ou fictivement diffrents. -- Paul Valry
La vraie morale se moque de la morale. -- Blaise Pascal
Que si le moi est hassable, aimer son prochain comme soi mme devient une atroce ironie. -- Paul Valry
Je m'aime trop pour pouvoir har qui que ce soi. -- JJ Rousseau
Comment pourrait-il y avoir un bien commun ? Ce mot se contredit lui mme. Ce qui peut tre commun n'a toujours que peu de valeur. -- Nietzsche
L'tat entre en conflit avec la religion, les intrts de la famille s'opposent  ceux de la patrie. Comment pourrions-nous nous contenter d'obir  la socit puisqu'elle est en nous divise contre elle-mme ? -- Le Senne
Pour qu'une action soit... lgale, il suffit qu'elle soit conforme  la loi; mais pour qu'elle soit morale... il faut en outre qu'elle ait pour mobile l'ide du devoir que prescrit la loi. -- Emmanuel Kant
La vraie morale ne s'occupe pas de ce que nous pensons et voulons, mais de ce que nous faisons. -- Trotsky
Pour parler schmatiquement: en 1880 on aurait pu rsumer les rsultats de l'analyse morale par cette formule: mme les coupables sont innocents ! Aujourd'hui, il faudrait renverser les termes et dire: mme les innocents sont coupables ! -- Jean Guitton
On ne fait pas ce qu'on veut et pourtant on est responsable de ce qu'on est: voil le fait. -- Jean-Paul Sartre
Il n'est rien qui ne colle davantage  la peau que le souvenir du pouvoir. -- Isaac Asimov
Je ne fais pas le bien que je veux, tandis que je fais le mal que je ne veux pas. -- Saint Paul
Nous dfendre quelque chose, c'est nous en donner envie. -- Montaigne
L'homme a cr le pch, et il repousserait cet enfant unique rien parce qu'il dplat  Dieu, le grand-pre du pch ? -- Nietzsche
Tant qu'on fera perdre la vie aux voleurs et aux meurtriers, les vols ne se commettront jamais sans assassinats. -- Le Marquis de Sade
Il n'a jamais tu une mouche, dit le dfenseur. Les mouches qu'il n'a pas tues ont t porter la peste dans une province entire, dit l'accusateur. -- Jean Guitton
Celui qui ordonne violences et tortures n'a pas la vue du fait ni par consquent la forte impression sur l'imagination. L'excutant obit  un suprieur et se sent irresponsable. -- Nietzsche
Ce qui nous force  mentir, c'est le sentiment de l'impossibilit chez les autres qu'ils comprennent entirement notre action. Mme le mensonge le plus compliqu est plus simple que le vrai. -- Paul Valry
Ce n'est pas la faute qui provoque le remords, mais le chtiment. D'o l'utilit non seulement sociale mais mtaphysique de la justice. -- Jean Dutourd
Le remords est la seule vertu qui reste au coupable. -- Voltaire
Si l'on fait abstraction de l'utilit sociale, quelle diffrence y aura-t-il entre le meurtre commis par l'assassin et celui commis par le bourreau ? -- Guyau
Jsus aimait les mchants, non les bons; le spectacle de leur indignation morale le poussait mme  la maldiction. Partout o l'on jugeait, il prenait parti contre ceux qui jugeaient. Il voulait tre un destructeur de la morale. -- Nietzsche
La justice est faite pour rassurer ceux qui n'ont pas affaire  elle. -- Brckner
On n'entend dire parfois  propos de tel ou tel criminel qu'il n'a l'excuse ni d'une hrdit vivieuse, ni d'une mauvaise ducation. Affirmation pour le moins trange et digne de M Jourdain quand il ne voulait ni prose ni vers. -- Jean Rostand
Je ne croirai  l'humilit chrtienne que quand je verrai un homme pieux s'humilier devant un homme qui ne l'est pas. -- Nietzsche
L'enfer, c'est d'avoir perdu l'espoir. -- Cronin
Une me aristocratique a le respect de soi. -- Nietzsche
Le droit c'est "l'ensemble des conditions qui permettent  la libert de chacun de s'accorder avec la libert de tous. " -- Emmanuel Kant
L'Etat est un immense cimetire o viennent s'enterrer toutes les manifestations de la vie individuelle. -- Bakounine
Ni Dieu, ni matre. -- Jean Grave
Pour les anarchistes, le problme humain est aussi simple que celui des noix. Brisez la coquille dure des institutions sociales et gotez le coeur savoureux; mais j'aurais aim savoir si jamais les noix pousseront sans coques sur les arbres. -- Arthur Koesthler
Vivre sa vie, c'est toujours gcher la vie des autres. -- E. Herriot
Pour qu'on ne puisse pas abuser du pouvoir, il faut que, par la disposition des choses, le pouvoir arrte le pouvoir. -- Montesquieu
La cohsion sociale est due en grande partie  la ncessit pour une socit de se dfendre contre d'autres. C'est d'abord contre tous les autres hommes qu'on aime les hommes avec lesquels on vit. -- Bergson
Que me servirait que ma patrie ft puissante et formidable, si, triste et inquiet, j'y vivais dans l'oppression et dans l'indigence ? -- Jean de La Bruyre
Par ces temps de spcialisation  outrance, il n'est que deux professions qui ne requirent ni diplme, ni exprience: la politique et la presse. La premire dcide du sort des Etats, la seconde fait l'opinion. -- Albert Mousset
Le verbe dsarmer est irrgulier dans toutes les langues. Il n'a ni premire personne, ni prsent, ni pass, il se conjugue surtout au futur et  la deuxime personne. On ne dit pas: je dsarme ou j'ai dsarm, mais du dsarmeras. -- E. Herriot
Tout travail travaille  faire un homme en mme temps qu'une chose. -- E. Mounier
Tu mprises l'ingnieur et son art. Tu ne voudras ni donner  son fils ta fille, ni pouser toi-mme la sienne. -- Platon
Comment et pourquoi je n'cris pas ma manire d'alller sous l'eau aussi longtemps que je puis rester sans manger, c'est  cause de la mchancet des hommes qui s'en serviraient pour assassiner au fond des mers. -- Lonard de Vinci
Ce n'est point le perfectionnement des machines qui est la vraie calamit, c'est le partage injuste que nous faisons de leur produit. -- Sismondi
Sous la forme machine(dans le systme capitaliste)le moyen de travail anantit les conditions d'existence; l'ouvrier, comme un assignat dmontis, n'a plus cours. -- Karl Marx
Les chemins de fer ont accentu le mauvais ct de la nature humaine, les mchants peuvent dsormais accomplir leurs mauvais desseins avec plus de rapidit. -- Gandhi
Vous parlerez d'amour quand il aura mang. -- Apollinaire
Le travail machinal de l'homme est l'esclavage transitoire d'un mcanisme imparfait. -- Fourasti
Une classe sociale est une collectivit de personnes qui jouent le mme rle dans la production. -- Boukharine
Les proltaires sont "les complments vivants d'un organisme mort". -- Karl Marx
Le producteur lui-mme n'a droit  son produit que pour une fraction dont le dnominateur est gal au nombre des individus dont la socit se compose. -- Proudhon
Karl Marx est n  Trves, dans un pays catholique, d'une famille isralite rcemment convertie au luthranisme. Sa pense sera prophtique comme celle d'Isral, dogmatique comme celle de Rome, rvolte comme celle de Luther. -- Daniel Villey
Il n'arrive point de barrique de sucre en Europe qui ne soit teinte de sang humain. -- Helvtius
J'appelle bourgeois quiconque renonce  soi-mme, au combat, et  l'amour pour sa scurit. J'appelle bourgeois quiconque met quelque chose au dessus du sentiment. -- Lon-Paul Fargue
Les orgueils blesss sont plus dangereux que les intrts lss. -- Louis de Bonald
L'avenir est la seule proprit que les matres concdent de bon gr aux esclaves. -- Albert Camus
Il n'y a pas de libert de conscience en gomtrie. -- Comte
Libert: c'est un de ces dtestables mots qui ont plus de valeur que de sens, qui chantent plus qu'ils ne parlent. -- Paul Valry
Une preuve de la libert tuerait la libert. -- Alain
Toute dfinition de la libert donnera raison au dterminisme. -- Bergson
La libert de notre volont se connat sans preuve par la seule exprience que nous en avons. -- Descartes
La raison que M Descartes a allgu pour prouver l'indpendance de nos actions libres par un prtendu sentiment vif interne n'a point de force... Nous ne nous apercevons pas toujours des causes, souvent imperceptibles, dont notre rsolution dpend. -- Leibniz
L'illusion de la libert vient de la conscience de notre action et de l'ignorance des causes qui nous font agir. -- Spinoza
Un homme ivre croit dire d'aprs un libre dcret de l'esprit ce que, revenu  son tat normal, il voudrait avoir tu. -- Spinoza
L'me humaine est un espce d'automate spirituel. -- Leibniz
On pourrait calculer la conduite future d'un homme avec autant de certitude qu'une clipse de lune ou de soleil et cependant soutenir en mme temps que l'homme est libre. -- Emmanuel Kant
Nous sommes libres quand nos actes manent de notre personnalit entire, quand ils l'expriment, quand ils ont avec elle cette indfinissable ressemblance qu'on trouve parfois entre l'oeuvre et l'artiste. -- Bergson
Si je connaissais toujours clairement ce qui est vrai et ce qui est bon, je ne serais jamais en peine de dlibrer quel jugement et quel choix je devrais faire, et ainsi je serais entirement libre sans tre jamais indiffrent. -- Descartes
Mieux vaut la libert aux enfers que l'esclavage aux cieux. -- Milton
La libert consiste  ne dpendre que des lois. -- Voltaire
L'homme n'est pas libre dans la mesure o il ne dpend de rien ni de personne. Il est libre dans l'exacte mesure o il dpend de ce qu'il ne peut pas aimer. -- Thibon
Entre le faible et le fort, c'est la libert qui opprime et la loi qui libre. -- Lacordaire
Un seul petit mot montre le lien entre le don et la libert. C'est le mot merci; comme le dit Chesterton, si l'homme n'tait pas libre, il ne pourrait pas dire Merci pour la moutarde. -- Fulton Sheen
L'homme est le seul tre qui prouve le besoin d'accomplir des actes inutiles. -- Lecomte de Noy
L'homme est pour l'homme l'tre suprme. -- Karl Marx
Dieu, qui nous donne l'tre, aime en nous le consentement  ne pas tre. -- Simone Weil
Cromwell allait ravager toute la chrtient, la famille royale tait perdue et la sienne  jamais puissante sans un petit grain de sable qui se mit dans son uretre. -- Blaise Pascal
Personne, parmi les hommes, lche ou brave, ds qu'il a vu le jour, ne peut se soustraire au destin. -- Homre
Si Dieu n'existe pas, tout est permis. -- Dostoewski
La mort est une surprise que fait l'inconcevable au concevable. -- Paul Valry
L'horreur de la mort n'est qu'un sentiment confus qui n'branle l'me que pour la conservation d'un corps tellement oppos au bonheur. -- N de Malebranche
Le philosophe ne pense  aucune chose moins qu' la mort et sa philosophie est une mditation de la vie, non de la mort. -- Spinoza
Ds qu'un homme est n il est assez vieux pour mourir. Heidegger, L'Etre et le temps. -- Heidegger
Nous sommes "un condamn  mort qui se prpare bravement au dernier supplice, qui met tous ses soins  faire belle figure sur l'chafaud et qui, entre temps, est enlev par une grippe espagnole. " -- Jean-Paul Sartre
Pourquoi se plaindre de possder dans le temps une limite ? Sans limite, il n'y a pas de forme. Sans forme, il n'y a pas de perfection. -- Lanza del Vasto
Le divin, c'est peut-tre ce qui, en l'homme, rsisterait au manque de Dieu. -- Jean Rostand
Percevoir la blancheur du papier, c'est sensation; percevoir le papier blanc, c'est perception. -- Dunan
Sentir, c'est juger. -- Eugne Delacroix
Nous voyons la couleur que nous savons que les objets ont. -- Lagneau
Cet horizon lointain, je ne le vois pas lointain; je juge qu'il est loin d'aprs sa couleur, d'aprs la grandeur relative de choses que j'y vois, d'aprs la confusion des dtails. -- Alain
Je ne touche pas ce d cubique. Non. Je touche successivement des artes, des pointes, des plans durs et lisses et runissant toutes ces apparences en un seul objet, je juge que cet objet est cubique. -- Alain
La chose perue n'est pas d'abord une signification pour l'entendement, mais une structure accessible  l'inspection du corps. -- Merleau Ponty
La mmoire est par essence un fait biologique, par accident un fait psychologique. -- Ribot
L'odeur dans l'air glac des brindilles de bois c'tait comme un morceau du pass, une banquise invisible dtache d'un hiver ancien qui s'avanait dans ma chambre. -- Marcel Proust
Le souvenir d'une agression peut provoquer la colre, nous ragissons violemment  ce souvenir, mais cette colre est une raction prsente, une motion prsente, bien plutt que le souvenir d'une motion. -- Eugne Delacroix
L'avenir du bonheur n'est plus du bonheur, le souvenir de la douleur est douleur encore. -- Lord Byron
L'oubli, condition d'existence. -- Gusdorf
Je n'ai pas encore assez oubli pour avoir des souvenirs. -- Jean Rostand
L'imagination tourmente moins que le souvenir. -- Andr Gide
Une bonne journe est celle o le pass s'est tenu  peu prs tranquille. -- Jean Rostand
Nous sommes faits de la mme toffe que les songes. -- Shakespeare
Nous tressuons, nous tremblons, nous palissons et rougissons aux secousses de nos imaginations. -- Montaigne
Entre aimer et imaginer qu'on aime, quel dieu verrait la diffrence ? L'homme prouve ce qu'il imagine prouver et dans le domaine du sentiment le rel ne se distingue pas de l'imaginaire. -- Andr Gide
Jouer, c'est rver avec tout son corps. -- Georges Duhamel
L'imagination est "la facult de rendre sensible ce qui est intellectuel". -- Joubert
L'imagination ne peut rendre sages les fous, mais elle les rend heureux  l'envi de la raison qui ne peut rendre ses amis que misrables. -- Blaise Pascal
Les avenues de la rverie sont les avenues prfres du diable. -- Julien Green
Une utopie est une ralit en puissance. -- Roger Vaillant
Rve de grandes choses; cela te permettra d'en faire au moins de toutes petites. -- Jules Renard
Si je veux penser  un chiligone, je conois bien  la vrit que c'est une figure compose de mille cts, mais je ne puis imaginer les mille cts d'un chiligone. -- Descartes
L'crivain original n'est pas celui qui n'imite personne, mais celui que personne ne peut imiter. -- Chateaubriand
L'humanit ne se pose jamais que les problmes qu'elle peut rsoudre. Le problme ne surgit que l o les conditions matrielles pour le rsoudre existent dj. -- Karl Marx
Le gnie est fait d'un dixime d'inspiration... et de neuf diximes de transpiration. -- TA Edison
L'intelligence... est la facult de fabriquer des objets artificiels, en particulier des outils  faire des outils et d'en varier indfiniment la fabrication. -- Bergson
L'homme est intelligent parce qu'il a une main. -- Anaxagore
L'intelligence est la capacit de rsoudre des problmes nouveaux. -- Claparde
L'intelligence n'est pas une fonction isolable. Elle est, dans tout comportement, la plasticit qui permet d'chapper aux automatismes inns ou acquis. -- Zazzo
L'homme intelligent se mesure  ce qu'il ne sait pas comprendre. -- Roger Vaillant
Le mtier des intellectuels est de remuer toutes choses sous leurs signes, noms ou symboles sans le contrepoids des actes rels. -- Paul Valry
Nous sommes  la fois tonnants et tonns; les animaux ne sont qu'tonnants. -- Rivarol
L'homme est le seul animal qui sache qu'il doit mourir; c'est aussi le seul qui puisse dvier de la ligne sociale en cdant  des proccupations gostes. Cette double imperfection est la ranon de l'intelligence. -- Bergson
Le langage est une activit symbolique, artificielle qui s'exerce au moyen d'organes primitivement engags dans les activits d'un autre ordre. -- Ombredane
La parole est la pense extrieure et la pense est la parole intrieure. -- Rivarol
Les penses naissent toutes habilles. -- Oscar Wilde
La pense n'est rien d'intrieur, elle n'existe pas hors du monde et des mots. -- Merleau Ponty
La parole n'accompagne pas une pense dj faite, mais l'accomplit. -- Merleau Ponty
On ne sait ce qu'on voulait dire que lorsqu'on l'a dit. -- Joubert
L'intention du dialogue nous parat tre celle d'une gense rciproque. C'est dans le dialogue que les ides se forment plus encore qu'elles ne se communiquent. -- Forest
Le langage est "ce beau domaine qui s'tend des profondeurs de la musique aux sommets de l'algbre". -- Alain
L'homme a parl son geste. Pourquoi ? Darwin en donne une forte raison qui est que le cri est compris aussi la nuit. -- Alain
Il y a des gens qui n'auraient jamais t amoureux s'ils n'avaient jamais entendu parler d'amour. -- La Rochefoucauld
Le jugement est la facult de penser le particulier comme contenu dans le gnral. -- Emmanuel Kant
Dans la croyance, il y a quelque chose de louche. La croyance c'est ce qui sans tre un acte de connaissance veut se faire passer pour tel. -- Goblot
Les tmraires... croient qu'ils savent, les sages... savent qu'ils croient. -- Jean Rostand
Croyance signifie essentiellement confiance: une assurance contre la crainte. -- Bergson
La persistance d'une opinion ne prouve rien en sa faveur. Il y a encore des astrologues. -- Jean Rostand
On peut convaincre les autres par ses propres raisons, mais on ne les persuade que par les leurs. -- Joubert
Une chose qui convainc n'est pas vraie pour autant. Elle est seulement convaincante. Remarque destine aux nes. -- Nietzsche
Les peuples se font des autres peuples l'image que leur ont donn leurs journaux; les membres d'une Eglise se font d'une autre Eglise celle qu'on leur inculque dans la leur. -- Tournier
La plupart attrapent une opinion comme on attrape la rougeole, par contagion. -- Jules Payot
Je pense comme ma terre, disait un propritaire... Les uns pensent comme leur terre, les autres somme leur boutique, quelques-uns comme leur marteau, quelques autres comme leur bourse vide qui aspire  se remplir. -- Joubert
C'est la croyance et non la raison qui mne le monde. L'erreur a cr beaucoup plus que la vrit. -- E. Herriot
C'est  travers une faon de vivre qu'on opte pour une manire de penser. -- Abb Joly
Il n'est pas indiffrent que dans la langue franaise ancienne, le mot doute (d'abord fminin) ait eu d'abord la signification de crainte qui persiste dans redouter. -- Delay
Ce n'est pas le doute, c'est la certitude qui rend fou. -- Jules Romains
La science n'a pas besoin de l'intolrance parce qu'elle peut prouver sa vrit; la mtaphysique n'y a pas droit parce qu'elle ne peut pas la prouver. -- Michel Verret
Le fanatisme est une surcompensation du doute. -- Jung
Moins un culte est raisonnable, plus on cherche  l'tablir par la force. -- JJ Rousseau
Il est bien plaisant de voir deux disputeurs de grammaire ou de mtaphysique montrer de la colre. C'est donc que chacun d'eux craint de souponner que l'autre ait raison. -- Alain
Nous pouvons tout sur nos ides qui sont impuissantes, rien sur nos motions qui sont toutes-puissantes. -- Payot
Je nommerai homme de jugement celui qui surmonte les ides sans les mpriser. -- Alain
On peut concevoir une barbarie savante, on ne saurait concevoir une barbarie lettre. -- La Harpe
Une poque de barbarie commence; les sciences la serviront. -- Nietzsche
La science a besoin de la philosophie dans la mesure o elle veut parvenir  se comprendre comme oeuvre de l'esprit. -- E. Le Roy
Le nombre de livres crits sur l'lectron en cinquante ans est sans doute plus grand que le nombre de livres crits sur la lune en cinq cents ans. Exister par le livre, c'est dj une existence, une existence si humaine, si solidement humaine ! -- Gaston Bachelard
Un microscope est un prolongement de l'esprit plutt que de l'oeil. Un instrument est une thorie matrialise. -- Gaston Bachelard
Le gnie de Newton a consist  dire que la lune tombe alors que tout le monde voit bien qu'elle ne tombe pas. -- Paul Valry
Il n'y a point au monde de lunette ni d'observatoire d'o l'on voit autre chose que des apparences. La science consiste  se faire une ide d'aprs laquelle on pourra expliquer toutes les apparences. -- Alain
Connatre, c'est mesurer. -- Brunschvicg
Il ne faut pas dire que la science est utile parce qu'elle nous permet de construire des machines. Il faut dire: les machines sont utiles parce qu'elles nous permettent de faire de la science. -- Poincar
Si elle n'a pas rponse  tout, peut tre la science, du moins, aura-t-elle remde  tout. -- Jean Rostand
La vrit scientifique n'arrive d'ordinaire au grand nombre que lorsque elle a cess d'tre vraie. -- Jean Rostand
La science ne se soucie ni de plaire, ni de dplaire, elle est inhumaine. -- Anatole France
Il est malais d'imaginer  quel point, d'ordinaire, un savant se dsintresse de l'oeuvre d'un autre savant si celui-ci n'est pas un matre qui le protge ou un lve qui l'honore. -- Jean Rostand
Je croyais qu'un savant tait toujours un homme qui cherche une vrit, alors que c'est souvent un homme qui vise une place. -- Jean Rostand
La science a fait de nous des dieux avant que nous mritions d'tre des hommes. -- Jean Rostand
La logique est "la science de la preuve". -- J. Stuart Mill
La logique est la morale de la pense. -- Rickert
Ce n'est pas la cigu, c'est le syllogisme qui tue Socrate. -- Paul Valry
Les procds de la logique formelle ne sont pas ceux de la pense qui se fait, mais ceux de la pense qui se parle. -- Pradines
Les mathmatiques sont "la science de l'ordre et de la mesure". -- Descartes
Une dmonstration n'est pas autre chose que la rsolution d'une vrit en d'autres vrits dj connues. -- Leibniz
Les axiomes doivent tre conus comme purement formels, c'est  dire dpourvus de tout contenu intuitif. Ces axiomes sont des crations libres de l'esprit humain. -- Albert Einstein
Nos axiomes une fois formuls, nous n'auront plus besoin de savoir ce que c'est qu'un point, un plan; un aveugle, quelqu'un qui n'a aucun sens pourra parfaitement comprendre la gomtrie. -- Elie Cartan
Le mathmaticien fabrique "un canevas purement logique sur lequel on pourra si l'on veut broder des figures gomtriques. " -- A. Reymond
Les mathmatiques sont la seule science o on ne sait pas de quoi on parle ni si ce qu'on dit est vrai. -- Lord Russel
Le mathmaticien fabrique des rcipients vides. C'est un tonnelier, non un vigneron. -- Michel Duffieux
Les mathmatiques n'ont pas besoin pour tre vraies que leurs objets soient rels... Le mathmaticien construit, sans autre instrument que sa pense, une science dont les objets n'ont de ralit que dans sa pense. -- Goblot
Dieu, toujours, fait de la gomtrie. -- Platon
Notre science tend toujours aux mathmatiques comme  un idal. -- Bergson
Les mathmatiques sont... l'espranto de la raison. -- Gaston Bachelard
Ce qu'il y a d'incomprhensible, c'est que le monde soit comprhensible. -- Albert Einstein
L'preuve "exprimentale" est "une crise de croissance de la pense". -- E. Le Roy
Pour la physique je croirais n'y rien savoir si je ne savais que dire comment les choses peuvent tre sans dmontrer qu'elles ne peuvent tre autrement. -- Descartes
Loin de signifier l'absence de relations, de lois ncessaires, le hasard manifeste au contraire leur trop d'abondance, leur trop de complexit eu gard  nos possibilits pratiques d'information et de prvision. -- G. Vassails
Le calcul des probabilits n'est que "le calcul d'un dterminisme partiellement inconnu au moyen des lments qu'on peut en connatre". -- Paul Moy
Le hasard est le dterminisme qui se comporte comme s'il avait une intention. -- Bergson
Ce qui est hasard  l'gard des hommes est dessein  l'gard de Dieu. -- Bossuet
La thorie physique est "un systme de propositions mathmatiques dduites d'un petit nombre de principes qui ont pour but de reprsenter aussi simplement, aussi compltement et aussi exactement que possible un ensemble de lois exprimentales." -- Duhem
L'volution est un vnement auquel personne n'a assist et qu'on ne peut reproduire. -- Jean Rostand
La slection naturelle est tout aussi aveugle qu'un accident de chemin de fer ou qu'une guerre moderne. -- Cunot
La biologie est la moins mathmatisable des sciences parce que la plus lourde en contenu concret. -- Jean Rostand
Connais toi toi-mme: maxime aussi pernicieuse que laide... Quiconque s'observe arrte son dveloppement. La chenille qui se connatrait elle-mme ne deviendrait jamais papillon. -- Andr Gide
Nous russissons  mieux nous connatre en sortant de nous-mmes et les circonstances nous permettent souvent de dceler dans des socits diffrentes des ntres le jeu de forces qui agissent galement dans les ntres mais  notre insu. -- Fauconnet
Les peuples heureux n'ont pas de sociologie, mais ils ont des moeurs, des institutions et des lois. -- Monnerot
La nature, on l'explique; la vie de l'me, on la comprend. -- Dilthey
Les prvisions sur le retour de la comte de Halley n'influent pas sur son orbite. Mais la rumeur de l'insolvabilit de la banque de Millingville eut une consquence directe sur son sort. Prophtiser son effondrement suffisait  le provoquer. -- Merton
Le transit du chemin de fer de Lyon  Marseille est moins variable que le dbit du Rhne dont il suit les voies. -- Charles Gide
Quand on entreprend d'expliquer un phnomne social il faut rechercher sparment la cause efficiente qui le produit et la fonction qu'il remplit. -- Durkheim
Ce que nous appelons les institutions ncessaires ne sont souvent que des institutions auxquelles nous sommes habitues. -- A de Tocqueville
L'histoire est dans la situation d'un physicien qui ne connatrait les faits que par le compte rendu d'un garon de laboratoire ignorant et peut tre menteur. -- Seignobos
Un document est un vieux papier que la dent des rats, la ngligence des hritiers, les flammes de l'incendie... les exigences de la chaise perce ont pargn par hasard. -- Alain
La critique est une mthode scientifique destine  distinguer le vrai du faux en histoire. -- Halkin
Le bon historien n'est d'aucun temps ni d'aucun pays. -- Fnelon
La ralit historique, parce qu'elle est humaine, est quivoque et inpuisable. -- Raymond Aron
L'histoire justifie ce que l'on veut. Elle n'enseigne absolument rien, car elle contient tout et donne des exemples de tout. Elle est le produit le plus dangereux que la chimie de l'intellect n'ait labor. -- Paul Valry
On a beau faire crotre l'effort, varier les mthodes, il n'en rsulte jamais qu'une vidence qui est l'impossibilit de sparer l'observateur de la chose observe et l'histoire de l'historien. -- Paul Valry
L'histoire est la rponse que pose au pass mystrieux la curiosit, l'inquitude, certains diront l'angoisse existentielle. -- Marrou
Jean sans Terre a pass par ici, voil qui est admirable, voil une ralit pour laquelle je donnerai toutes les thories du monde. -- Thomas Carlyle
L'histoire est la science des choses qui ne se rptent pas. -- Paul Valry
Ce n'est pas la mmoire qu'il faut transmettre, c'est l'Histoire. -- Jorge Semprun
Ce qu'on fait n'est jamais compris mais seulement lou ou blm. -- Nietzsche
Toutes les vrits seraient bonnes  dire si on les disait ensemble. -- Joubert
Il faut aimer la vrit plus que soi-mme et les autres plus que la vrit. -- R. Rolland
La vrit, pensa Scobie, n'a jamais eu de valeur relle pour aucun tre humain. Elle est un symbole que poursuivent les mathmaticiens et les philosophes. Dans les rapports humains la bont et les mensonges valent mieux que mille vrits. -- G. Greene
La fausset d'un jugement n'est pas selon nous un argument contre lui. La seule question est de savoir dans quelle mesure ce jugement maintient la vie. -- Nietzsche
La vrit du christianisme est-elle dmontre par la fermet des chrtiens, leurs vertus, leur panouissement ? Il faut dmontrer la vrit autrement que la vracit. -- Nietzsche
Les efforts bienfaisants d'une religion ne prouvent rien pour sa vrit, tout aussi peu que le bonheur que l'alin gote  son ide fixe prouve quoi que ce soi pour la sagesse de cette ide. -- Nietzsche
Les vrits consolantes doivent tre dmontres deux fois. -- Jean Rostand
Le microscope lectronique rassure l'inventeur de la mcanique ondulatoire. Mais une thse sur le nant ou un beau pome, en quoi se prouvent-ils ? -- Guitton
Celui qui revient dans l'espace ne revient pas dans le temps. -- Janklvitch
Descartes a log la vrit  l'hostellerie de l'vidence mais il a nglig de nous en donner l'adresse. -- Helvtius
Il n'est pas de tyran au monde qui aime la vrit; la vrit n'obit pas. -- Alain
Les amis de la vrit sont ceux qui la cherchent et non ceux qui se vantent de l'avoir trouv. -- Condorcet
Le paradoxe est la passion de la pense; un penseur sans paradoxe est comme un amant sans passion. -- Kierkegaard
Deux hommes s'ils veulent s'entendre ont d d'abord se contredire. La vrit est fille de discussion, non pas fille de sympathie. -- Gaston Bachelard
Ds qu'on a pens quelque chose, chercher en quel sens le contraire est vrai. -- Simone Weil
Vrit en de des Pyrnes, erreur au del. -- Blaise Pascal
Moins on connat le monde, plus facilement on l'explique. -- Brunschvicg
Tout ce qui est rationnel est rel, tout ce qui est rel est rationnel. -- Georg Hegel
Quand dix personnes qui pensent la mme chose se runissent, elles ne pensent plus. -- Alain
Une foule n'est accessible qu' des motions, elle est incapable d'une attitude d'esprit objective. -- Jules Payot
Camons avait pris pour devise: je ne dirai jamais que la vrit. On trouvera donc naturel qu'il ait vcu dans l'exil, dans les prisons et dans la pauvret. -- Roger Vaillant
Tous les efforts de la violence ne peuvent affaiblir la vrit... Toutes les lumires de la vrit ne peuvent rien pour arrter la violence. -- Blaise Pascal
Il n'est rien qui soit plus vritablement  nous que nos erreurs. -- Brochard
Qu'est-ce donc que le temps ? quand personne ne me le demande, je le sais; ds qu'il s'agit de l'expliquer, je ne sais plus. -- Saint Augustin
La mditation sur le temps est la vritable preuve du philosophe. -- Alain
Le prsent: ce pont sans tendue qui divise en deux le temps sans bornes et qui demeure en place, invariable, semblable  un perptuel midi auquel ne succderait jamais la fracheur du soir. -- Schopenhauer
O Temps Suspends ton vol C'est le voeux du pote, mais qui se dtruit par la contradiction si l'on demande: Combien de temps le Temps va-t-il suspendre son vol ? Un temps plus pur continuera pendant l'arrt du temps. -- Alain
Le tragique est toujours dans l'attente, non dans la catastrophe. Aussi le temps se trouve tre le personnage principal de toute tragdie. -- Alain
L'homme ordinaire ne se proccupe que de passer le temps, l'homme de talent de l'employer. -- Schopenhauer
Je suis, j'existe, cela est certain, mais combien de temps ? Autant de temps que je pense... je ne suis donc, prcisment parlant, qu'une chose qui pense, c'est--dire un esprit. -- Descartes
Je ne peux me reprsenter dans mes penses une chose sensible ou un objet  part la sensation que j'en ai, l'objet et la sensation sont identiques et ne peuvent s'abstraire l'un de l'autre. -- Berkeley
C'est le phosphore qui pense en nous. -- Feuerbach
Chez moi, les ides ne sont rien d'autre que les choses matrielles transposes et traduites dans la tte des hommes. -- Karl Marx
Les Ethiopiens font leurs Dieux noirs et avec le nez camus, les Thraces disent que les leurs ont les yeux bleus et les cheveux rouges. -- Xnophane de Colophon
Fait capital et d'une immense porte, une conception anthropomorphique de Dieu nous est  la fois philosophiquement interdite et religieusement ncessaire. -- Feuerbach
Il ne suffit pas du tout  l'homme de savoir si Dieu est. Il veut savoir s'il est quelqu'un et s'il rpond. -- Lanza del Vasto
Deus abscondidus, Dieu cach. Si Dieu n'et permis qu'une religion elle et t trop reconnaissable... s'il n'y avait des martyrs qu'en notre religion, de mme. -- Blaise Pascal
La religion consiste  croire par volont, sans preuve et mme contre les preuves que l'esprit, valeur suprme et juge des valeurs, existe sous les apparences. -- Alain
Le parfait athisme se tient au sommet de l'chelle sur l'avant-dernier degr qui mne  la foi parfaite. -- Dostoewski
L'athisme est le sel qui empche la croyance en Dieu de se corrompre. -- Lagneau
Ceux qui croient en un Dieu y pensent-ils aussi passionnment que nous qui n'y croyons pas  son absence ? -- Jean Rostand
Il n'y a jamais eu qu'un seul chrtien et il a fini sur la Croix. -- Nietzsche
Le mme instinct de vie loigne l'incroyant du dsespoir et le croyant de la saintet. -- Jean Rostand
Autrefois on cherchait  dmontrer qu'il n'y a pas de Dieu; aujourd'hui on montre comment cette foi en l'existence de Dieu a pu se former. -- Nietzsche
L'athisme est une ngation de Dieu et par cette ngation de Dieu pose l'existence de l'homme. -- Karl Marx
L'homme pauvre possde un Dieu riche. -- Feuerbach
La religion est le soupir de la crature accable, le coeur d'un monde sans coeur... Elle est l'opium du peuple. -- Karl Marx
Athisme, signe de force d'esprit, mais jusqu' un certain degr seulement. -- Blaise Pascal
L'existence d'un Crateur incr sera en contradiction flagrante avec le principe (de causalit) au nom duquel nous nous flattions d'avoir russi  faire surgir du nant la Cause premire. -- Brunschvicg
Nous n'aurons pas expliqu le pourquoi de l'tre parce que nous aurons imagin un Etre sans pourquoi. -- Brunschvicg
Un Dieu prouv ne serait pas Dieu, il ne serait qu'une chose dans le monde. -- Jaspers
La seule excuse de Dieu, c'est qu'il n'existe pas. -- Stendhal
Quand bien mme cette immense fabrique (l'univers) apporterait les plus extraordinaires merveilles et ne coterait qu'une seule larme d'un seul enfant, moi, je refuse. -- Dostoewski
Le diable n'est que l'oisivet de Dieu. -- Nietzsche
C'est dans l'existence du mal et dans la souffrance des innocents que l'athisme trouve sa base permanente de ravitaillement. -- Gabriel Marcel
Si Dieu est un Dieu artiste, n'est-ce-pas au sens nronien du mot ? -- Brunschvicg
Le drame d'un homme se fraie le chemin  travers le drame des autres. -- Javan Hristie
La crainte de Dieu nous est aussi ncessaire pour nous maintenir dans le bien que la crainte de la mort pour nous retenir dans la vie. -- Joubert
On ne peut cesser de croire en Dieu sans cesser au pralable de l'aimer. -- De La Bonnardire
La foi est l'habitude de croire une chose par l'autorit de quelqu'un qui vous l'a dit. -- Bossuet
La foi n'a pas besoin de la preuve, elle doit mme la regarder comme son ennemie. -- Kierkegaard
Que m'importe que Dieu n'existe pas ? Dieu donne  l'homme de la divinit. -- Saint-Exupry
L'activit est une affectivit manque. -- Janklvitch
Une minute de patience quivaut  dix anne de tranquilit. -- Borniche
Ne pouvant avoir le sourire de l'amour, je me condamne  sa grimace. -- Franois Truffaut
Toute rencontre est un risque, une aventure, une grce. -- E. Mounier
Il n'y a rien qu'un hrosme au monde: c'est de le voir tel qu'il est, et cependant de l'aimer. -- Michel-Ange
La perfection dans un homme, c'est d'tre ouvert. -- P Emmanuel
Chaque instant, et quoi qu'il advienne, me pntre de joie. Oh ! je suis merveilleux ! -- W Whitman
"Ni aujourd'hui ni jamais, la richesse ne suffit  classer un homme, mais aujourd'hui plus que jamais la pauvret le dclasse." -- Charles Maurras
"La dcadence d'une socit commence quand l'homme se demande : "Que va-t-il arriver ?" au lieu de se demander : "Que puis-je faire ?" -- Denis de Rougemont
"Tout le rve de la dmocratie est d'lever le proltaire au niveau de btise du bourgeois. Le rve est en partie accompli." --  Gustave Flaubert
"L'avis de la majorit ne peut tre que l'expression de l'incomptence." -- Ren Gunon
"La dmocratie, c'est l'art de diriger le cirque  partir de la cage des singes." -- Henry Louis Mencken
"Des sottises faites par des gens habiles ; des extravagances dites par des gens d'esprit ; des crimes commis par d'honntes gens... voil les rvolutions." -- Louis de Bonald
"Il faut peser les voix et non les compter." -- Joseph de Maistre
"La dmocratie ? Savez-vous ce que c'est ? Le pouvoir des poux de manger des lions." -- Georges Clmenceau
"Une esprance collective ne peut donc pas tre dompte. Chaque touffe tranche reverdit plus forte et plus belle. Tout dsespoir en politique est une sottise absolue." -- Charles Maurras
"L' homme suprieur est celui qui remplit son devoir." -- Eugne Ionesco
"C'est le devoir qui cre le droit et non le droit qui cre le devoir." -- Franois-Ren de Chateaubriand
"L'efficacit est la rvolution dirige par les conservateurs." --  Roger Nimier
"Tous les hommes naissent libres et gaux en doigts." -- Alain Sanders
"L'lection, c'est la mare des mdiocrits." -- Honor de Balzac
"Je n'ai jamais vot, je ne voterai jamais pour rien ni personne. Je ne crois pas aux hommes." -- Louis-Ferdinand Cline
"L'lection encourage le charlatanisme, dtruit d'avance le prestige de l'lu, l'oblige  s'humilier devant ceux qui doivent lui obir." -- Ernest Renan
"L'histoire est crite par les vainqueurs." -- Robert Brasillach
"La vie ne vaut pas la peine d'tre vcue si ce n'est pour la brler au service d'une grande cause." -- Jos Antonio Primo de Rivera.
"La France [...] a toujours cru que l'galit consistait  trancher ce qui dpasse." -- Jean Cocteau
"Si j'avance, suivez-moi ; si je meurs vengez-moi ; si je recule tuez-moi." -- Henri de la Rochejacquelein
"Ayant dit un nombre prodigieux de sottises, la Rvolution en a fait dire encore plus." -- Jacques Bainville
"La Rpublique, en France, a ceci de particulier que personne n'en veut et que tout le monde y tiens." -- Comte de Gobineau
"L'lection encourage le charlatanisme." -- Ernest Renan
"Ma personne n'est rien, mon principe est tout." -- Comte de Chambord
"Si vous avez rsolu d'tre patriote, vous serez obligatoirement royaliste, la raison le veut." -- Charles Maurras
"Il n'est pas une ide ne d'un esprit humain qui n'ait fait couler du sang sur la terre." -- Charles Maurras
"Il faut refaire des hommes libres." -- Georges Bernanos
  1. Once you have their money, you never give it back.
  3. Never pay more for an acquisition than you have to.
  6. Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity.
  7. Keep your ears open.
  8. Small print leads to large risk.
  9. Opportunity plus instinct equals profit.
 10. Greed is eternal.
 13. Anything worth doing is worth doing for money.
 16. A deal is a deal...until a better one comes along.
 17. A contract is a contract is a contract...but only between Ferengi.
 18. A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all.
 19. Satisfaction is not guaranteed.
 21. Never place friendship above profit.
 22. A wise man can hear profit in the wind.
 27. There's nothing more dangerous than an honest businessman.
 28. Whisper your way to success.
 31. Never insult of a Ferengi's mother...insult something he cares about instead.
 33. It never hurts to suck up to the boss.
 34. War is good for business.
 35. Peace is good for business.
 40. She can touch your lobes, but never your latinum.
 41. Profit is its own reward.
 44. Never confuse wisdom with luck.
 47. Never trust a man wearing a better suit than your own.
 48. The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife.
 52. Never ask when you can take.
 57. Good customers are as rare as latinum--treasure them.
 58. There is no substitute for success.
 59. Free advice is seldom cheap.
 60. Keep your lies consistent.
 62. The riskier the road, the greater the profit.
 65. Win or lose, there's always Hupyrian beetle snuff.
 75. Home is where the heart is...but the stars are made of latinum.
 76. Every once in a while, declare peace....it confuses the hell out of your enemies.
 79. Beware of the Vulcan greed for knowledge.
 82. The flimsier the product, the higher the price.
 85. Never let the competition know what you're thinking.
 89. Ask not what your profits can do for you, but what you can do for your profits.
 94. Females and finances don't mix.
 95. Expand...or die.
 97. Enough...is never enough.
 98. Every man has his price.
 99. Trust is the biggest liability of all.
102. Nature decays, but latinum is forever.
103. Sleep can interfere....   [cut off]
104. Faith moves mountains...of inventory.
106. There is no honor in poverty.
109. Dignity and an empty sack...is worth the sack.
111. Treat people in your debt like family...exploit them.
112. Never have sex with the boss's sister.
113. Always have sex with the boss.
121. Everything is for sale, even friendship.
123. Even a blind man can recognize the glow of latinum.
139. Wives serve, brothers inherit.
141. Only fools pay retail.
144. There's nothing wrong with charity...as long as it winds up in your pocket.
162. Even in the worst of times, someone makes a profit.
177. Know your enemies...but do business with them always.
181. Not even dishonesty can tarnish the shine of profit.
189. Let others keep their reputation...you keep their latinum.
190. Hear all, trust nothing.
192. Never cheat a Klingon...unless you can get away with it.
194. It's always good business to know your customers before they walk in the door.
202. The justification for profit is profit.
203. New customers are like razor-toothed greeworms.  They can be succulent, but sometimes they bite back.
208. Sometimes the only thing more dangerous than a question is an answer.
211. Employees are the rungs on the ladder of success. Don't hesitate to step on them.
214. Never begin a business negotiation on an empty stomach.
217. You can't free a fish from water.
218. Always know what you're buying.
223. Beware the man who doesn't make time for oo-mox.
229. Latinum lasts longer than lust.
236. You can't buy fate.
239. Never be afraid to mislabel a product.
242. More is good...all is better.
255. A wife is a luxury...a smart accountant a necessity.
261. A wealthy man can afford anything except a conscience.
263. Never allow doubt to tarnish your lust for latinum.
266. When in doubt, lie.
284. Deep down, everyone's a Ferengi.
285. No good deed ever goes unpunished.
